- Rating:
- PG
- House:
- Astronomy Tower
- Genres:
- Humor
- Era:
- Multiple Eras
- Spoilers:
- Philosopher's Stone Chamber of Secrets Prizoner of Azkaban
- Stats:
-
Published: 01/12/2002Updated: 01/12/2002Words: 1,696Chapters: 1Hits: 2,592
Ten Storytellers For One Bedtime Story
Smoke
- Story Summary:
- You need ten storytellers to tell one home-made bedtime story
Chapter 01
- Chapter Summary:
- You need 10 storytellers to tell 1 home-made bedtime story
- Posted:
- 01/12/2002
- Hits:
- 2,592
- Author's Note:
- of course to Quinn (marleystar) my beta reader.
To Melo, an Italian poster, who gave me the idea for the story the storytellers will tell (it is not Cinderella. Cinderella was just a pretext).
To my grandmother who told me the story of Cinderella when I was a kid, but Italian style (yes there is a Cenerentola tale, of XVII century, with the fairies, more than one, from Sardinia, but where she is a terrible girl. And a killer, as well. Very different from Perrault. Much more different from Disney.).
Ten Storytellers For One Bedtime Story
"I have no intention to feed my goddaughter those stupid sexist fairy tales!"
Harry gazed at her, doubtfully: "Well... I always considered Cinderella to be a classic fairy tale."
Hermione tilted her chin with a defiant glitter in her eye: "A classic sexist or a sexist classic I dare say... The female characters are all negative."
Harry smiled "Well, I may agree about the stepmother and the stepsisters..."
"Oh no! Every time you read these stories, you accept the lesson that the aggressive female always fails while the submissive female always achieves!
"Well, you mean that poor Cinderella is the true negative character?" said Ginny.
"I’m ashamed of you Ginny! Cinderella is dangerous: she is beautiful and sweet and terribly passive. And she succeeds in reaching her goal (marriage, if you can call that a goal…) due to these so-called qualities… It’s totally unrealistic: do you really want to corrupt your daughter's mind, leaving her searching for the impossible? Success from passivity, I mean! Believing your wishes will come true only if you dream them often enough? Or spending all her free time trying to become beautiful? This way all she might become is just another anorexic teen."
Harry sneered. "Well, I had had to figure out your reactions about a ‘girl’, who cooks, cleans, and sews for her family… she should be outside killing dragons, I guess, on your opinion..."
"You are completely wrong, Harry! I have nothing against a woman who chooses to take care of her family… The trouble is that Cinderella, after all that cooking, cleaning and sewing doesn't enjoy a proud sensation of completion. She harbours among the ashes, feeling degraded. She does her work, and a substantial amount of work I must say: raising a family is not as simple as serving hot dogs during a Quidditch match, I’m sure.
But you perceive her in degradation, filthy as the ashes! That's the disturbing detail! That the classical female works, in this sexist tale appear silly and worthless! Cinderella should be proud to be able to do so many different and useful things perfectly, instead! And, if this is what she really wants, she should try to build her own family!"
"Well, what about the glass slipper? I always found it very funny, the idea of Cinderella leaving her glass slipper to the Prince… And so endearing: the candlelight, the ball, the smell of the roses in the garden of the Castle. The two lovers forgetting the whole world, the music playing softly, far in the dark, and Cinderella mindlessly leaving her glass slipper on the grass of the park. So lovely…" said Ginny, with a dreamy look in her eyes.
Hermione blushed, and then whispered uneasily "Ginny, the glass slipper is a … well, a symbol of something once lost, never comes back again… Something you may loose if you stay late alone at night with Prince Charming, while your family warned you to come back home early… Something the Prince tastes… and likes… and would like to taste again…"
"Hmmm what do you mean?" asked Harry suddenly interested.
"Well… virginity of course!"
Ginny blushed furiously and brought her hands to the mouth.
Harry burst out laughing.
After a while Ron stepped into the room, stole a glance to Hermione and gently asked "I was listening to this madness from the hall… So… ok, the stepmother is negative, Cinderella is negative, and the glass slipper is NC-17… but there is a godmother in this tale… Do you have something against the godmother too?"
Hermione didn't look at him, but said quietly "Of course… she is the godmother of the young woman, and all she thinks about is presenting her a beautiful gown for a Ball… No good godmother would ever present her beloved goddaughter a gown! Never!"
Ginny stole her a malicious glance. "You mean you'll never give a dress to my little daughter? This sweet and beautiful, and, unluckily, not so passive baby?"
Hermione blushed slightly and impatiently: "Oh no, Ginny, don't be so literal.. But I was simply thinking that good books are generally better than beautiful gowns."
Ginny, clearly feigning offence said "But if one day your little goddaughter would like so much to go to a Ball, instead of the usual library? What would you do? Hand her a book?"
"I really hope she will not become a Ball addicted silly ditz!" Hermione's voice sounded severe.
Harry gently stroked her shoulder: "My very dear Mione… if I remember correctly, some years ago, you too, you went to a Ball. And it took you three hours to get ready… I remember this perfectly, just as it was yesterday."
Ron's ears turned a delicate shade of red and he mumbled "Harry’s right! You played the mysterious girl all the week, not telling to anyone who was your date. And you kept all the evening fraternising with the enemy. Fanning your eyelashes to that demented Krum. A grown man harassing a child, who couldn’t correctly pronounce your name…"
Ginny grinned broadly. "Well, actually, you met him at the library… Maybe I’m undervaluing the romantic power of libraries dust…"
Hermione felt suddenly left without words, but she was saved by the twins: Fred and George rushed into the room.
"What are you waiting for?"
"There are people dying of starvation, downstairs!"
Harry answered gently. "We can’t come down for the dinner, until the kid is sleeping. And she closes her eyes, only with a good story!"
George said, sheepishly. "You could simply hex her."
"Perfect! I know a pair of interesting charms that could work wonderfully," said Fred
"Not on my daughter, morons!"
"Dear Harry, we tried a lot of charms on Ginny when she was a little kid, and now, look at her! You should be grateful to us for the rest of your life!" said Fred.
Ginny waved her wand menacingly "I remember very well your so called charms… point your wands to my daughter and I'll transform both of you in a couple of toads!"
George looked at her in disbelief. "I don’t want to interfere in the way you want to raise my niece… But my dear younger and more inexpert sister, I find your education rather… daring.
First you want to tell her sexually oriented tales with Charming Princes and Scarlet Cinderella’s snogging in the dark… "
Harry and Ron sneered. Hermione rolled her eyes. Ginny blushed furiously.
George went on, very severe: "And now you want the innocent young-woman-to-be to look at family abuses scenes. Horridly performed by her own mother."
Ginny tapped the tip of her wand nervously on the palm of her hands.
Fred grinned maliciously "By the way, I think our mother would be curious to hear your words about dances, roses, and mindless giving away glass slippers to Princes…"
Harry blushed. "Ginny is my wife now, and any detail concerning glass slippers is our own business, now!"
George drawled, "Actually I don’t agree too much about the slipper theory, I mean, if I remember correctly in this tale there is also another man, who helps the Prince retrieving Cinderella… And he wanders through the Realm testing the glass slipper on the most charming princesses of the country…"
"Lucky man!" mumbled Fred.
"Fred! Shame on you!" cried Ginny and Hermione together.
"Oh, you mean you can speak so freely about sexual symbolism, and now Fred can’t? You are against the symmetry of thoughts? Or you mean that the slipper quest was simply a male sexual celebration, kind of rape on few random victims, using the marriage possibility as a tempting reward and the King's power (the patriarchal establishment) as a cover? And Fred should be ashamed of this fantasy flickering through his mind? Or of not being aware of the intrinsic violence of the foot testing?" said George lazily.
Hermione burst out laughing. She always had a soft spot for George, and she would have liked to have a brother like him. She shrugged, yes, it was true, she would have really liked to call George "brother". His sense of humour was more subtle, definitely, than Fred's. And he didn't indulge in proud and sarcasm as… as that dumb proud clueless old-fashioned git of Ron Weasley, her so called best friend.
Fred chuckled and continued: "Well, let's not lose our time about tiny details… We were listening to all the fuss you were making, and we had the impression you were not able to figure out a good tale, everyone of you might listen without feeling disgusted…"
George smiled gently "And of course, we thought that you needed a wise advice, from older relatives."
"Hexing my daughter is not exactly wise advice."
"You are young, Harry, and this is the first child you have to cope with… Your daughter is the first Weasley of the new generation. After another couple of kids you'll understand the subtle charm of charms.
But if you really do not want to use magic, then, the best thing will be inventing a tale…" drawled George.
Fred "All of us, obviously."
Hermione: "And why should it be better than an old tale?"
"Because everybody will bring something of himself. Besides, Hermione," And George winced, "what world would be this one, if we all agreed on everything?"
Hermione smiled. "This is a good idea, actually."
Fred smiled exultantly "I’ll start the story, but then, my very dear Ms Granger, everybody must continue, especially you!"
"Why me?"
"Because you’re the one who doesn’t like Cinderella!"
Fred chuckled, "Shut up!
Once upon time in a very far Realm, there was a wonderful Charming Prince, named Fredericus…"
To be continued