Harry Potter and the Veil of Mystery

Chapter 5

The Sleepover

When Harry recovered from the usual disorientation of traveling by Floo powder, he looked around and quickly saw Hermione, Ron, and Ginny standing in the living room, talking. They walked over to greet him.

"Hi, Harry! Great to see you again, finally," Ron said cheerfully.

"You doing okay, Harry?" asked Ginny.

"Yeah, pretty good... even better, being here, with you guys, and in a house where 'wizard' and 'magic' aren't dirty words. Where are your parents?" he asked Hermione.

"They were supposed to be back by now, but they're running late with some stuff they had to do," she said. "They called and said they'd be another half hour."

"Okay, Hermione, are you going to tell us now?" asked Ron.

"Tell you what?" asked Hermione, confused.

To Harry, Ron said, "She's been acting like there's something she wants to tell us, but didn't want to do it until you got here. You know, it's this 'I know something you don't know' sort of expression."

Hermione looked at Ron sourly. "That's the problem with spending so much time around people, they start to work out things like that. I guess I have to work on my poker face."

"Your what?" asked Ginny, looking blank.

"Guess that's not really a phrase in the wizarding world," Harry noted. He glanced at Hermione, whose expression said, go ahead, tell them. He tried to make his voice sound casual as he said, "Hermione and I found out who next year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is."

"Oh, boy, I feel like there should be somber music playing, a dirge maybe," said Ron, grinning. "In fact, I was thinking, in the room where they teach that class, there should be a plaque that reads 'Hall of Misfortune'-you know, like 'Hall of Fame'-with the subheading, 'Hogwarts' Distinguished Defense Against the Dark Arts Teachers, and Their Tragic Fates,' and then a gallery with each teacher's portrait, and below, a description of how they met their unhappy ends." Ginny chuckled a little, but Hermione was frowning, which Ron did not notice.

"Anyway," continued Ron, "So who's the poor sap they've got to do it this year?"

Harry almost smiled; he couldn't wait to see the look on Ron's face. "That would be me."

Ron looked blank for a second, then laughed. "No, c'mon, seriously, who is it?"

Harry glanced at Ginny; he could tell by the astonishment on her face that she believed him.

"I'm afraid I'm serious, Ron," Harry said. "Dumbledore said it was because of what I did with the D.A. He wants me to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts."

Ron looked at Hermione, in shock. She nodded. "It's true, Ron. That's why I really wanted to tell you, but I wanted to wait for Harry,"

Ginny's look of astonishment had transformed to one of joy. "You're going to be teaching us? Oh, that's so great!" She was so excited that the last word was more like a squeak. She rushed forward and threw her arms around Harry. "Congratulations!"

Harry chuckled and hugged her back. He glanced at Hermione, who looked very pleased. "Seems there's a lot of hugging involved in this teaching business," he joked. To Ginny, who had just released him, he said, "Thanks. At least I know there'll be one friendly face in my classes."

She playfully shoved him in the chest. "Are you kidding? People will be thrilled!"

Harry looked as if he didn't believe her, but didn't want to contradict her and rain on her parade. "That would be nice," he said.

The news was registering with Ron only very slowly. "You're really serious?"

Harry decided to have mercy on Ron, and explain it so that it didn't sound so off-the-wall. "Okay, here's the main reason. You got an Outstanding on your O.W.L. for Defense Against the Dark Arts, right?"

"Yeah, I did. How'd you know?"

"Because Dumbledore told me that every fifth year in the D.A. did, too. He figures I'm largely responsible, and hopes I can do it for the whole school."

"Every fifth year in the D.A.? Wow, that is impressive..." Ron was starting to come out of his shock. "Funny, when I think of it like that, just doing in classes what you did in the D.A., it doesn't seem so strange. It's just that we think of teachers as these authority figures who are all strict and give out detentions and stuff... I can't see you doing that, but I can see you helping people learn. I guess that's what Dumbledore wants." He looked at Harry more seriously. "How do you feel about this? I mean, I'd be terrified, if it was me."

"I think my reactions were pretty much the same as yours... shock, disbelief, terror..." Harry smiled. "But I've had a whole, what, forty-eight hours now to get used to it, so I'm not doing so badly now. Hermione has been serving as my cheerleader and self-confidence builder, and now it looks like she's got company," he said, looking at Ginny, who smiled back and nodded.

"You'll be great, Harry," she enthused. "You'll be wonderful."

He shook his head in surprise at her attitude. "Like I said to Hermione, you just keep telling me that."

"Okay, we will," said Ginny.

"Anyway, I've gotten used to the idea a bit, but I'm kind of worried about how the Slytherins are going to act. There's bound to be a test of my authority, probably early."

"You can give out detentions, can't you?" Ron asked.

"Yes, and Dumbledore pretty much told me that I was going to have to do so at some point." Harry said.

"And it's going to be mostly Slytherins," Ginny speculated, "partly because they don't like you anyway, and partly because Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff won't be trying to get on your back. Their prefects were in the D.A., so they'll be telling their houses to give you a break. So the point is, don't give Slytherins a break because it seems like you're only giving them detentions. That's bound to happen."

"Snape'll be on me, asking why I'm only giving his house detentions."

"Just tell him to go get stuffed," Ron suggested.

"Yeah, right," Harry said. "That'll work."

"Actually, Ron's right, though you have to be a little more polite than that," Hermione said. "But you do have to be firm. You tell him that the students in his house are testing your authority, and as he well knows, a teacher has to put his foot down. Then tell him that if he tells his house to behave properly in your classes, the detentions will stop."

"Hang on, let me write this down," Harry joked.

"I think you'll know what to say when the time comes," Hermione assured him.

"Wait a minute, how am I going to give detentions?" Harry asked, suddenly in a mild panic. "The teacher has to be there as well, and I'll be studying or with Quidditch practice. The Slytherins'll start getting detentions on purpose so my time'll be all messed up."

"Didn't McGonagall tell you?" asked Hermione in surprise. "After you left Hogwarts the day before yesterday, I was asking her about some of this stuff, how it would work with you teaching, and I asked about detentions. She said that any detentions you give would be served with her."

"Excellent," said Ron. "That should be a pretty good deterrent."

Harry was relieved. "That was good of her. I hate to think of what might happen if I had to do them myself. Funny, I'd never looked at detentions from the teacher's side of it until now. It never occurred to me that they might rather be doing something else as well."

They heard a noise coming from the fireplace and turned around; Neville was recovering his balance, then walking towards them. "Hi, everyone!" he said cheerfully.

"Hi, Neville," they all said, almost in chorus. "Thanks for coming," said Hermione.

"Thanks for inviting me," Neville said. He looked around. "This is neat, I've never been in a Muggle house before. Is this what most are like?" he asked, looking at Harry and Hermione.

"Bit bigger, I think," said Harry.

"Yes, it is, a little bit," agreed Hermione. "My parents are dentists, so their income's a little above average, but we're not rich or anything. You'll get the tour of the house when my parents get back. It should be any time now."

"My dad would be going nuts," said Ron. "Asking about every little thing, how does this work, how does that work..."

"Oh, Hermione, I just remembered, I need to ask you what you've told your parents about the stuff we've done, you know, the dangerous stuff," Harry said. "How much of it do they know?"

"If in doubt, don't say it," she said. "The first year, with the Sorcerer's Stone, I told them everything, and my mother almost had a heart attack. Not that she was angry, just really worried. And in the second year, I couldn't very well avoid telling her that I was Petrified for a month or so. She was pretty worried about that, too. So in the third year, when you saved us from the dementors, well, she didn't hear anything about that, or us setting Sirius free, or the Department of Mysteries. No reason for her to worry needlessly."

"So, Neville, have you heard the news about Harry?" asked Ron, looking eager to get to see someone else's reaction.

"You mean about him teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts?" Neville asked guilelessly, as though there might be other news about Harry he hadn't heard.

"Yeah, that," said Ron, looking rather less eager.

"How did you find out, Neville? Not many people have been told, I thought," asked Hermione.

"My gran wrote Professor Dumbledore a letter recently, and he mentioned it when writing her back," said Neville. "She just got it today." Looking at Harry, he said, "Congratulations, you really deserve it. I mean, I got an Outstanding on my Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.! Last year at this time, I didn't think I'd be able to manage an Acceptable. Being in the D.A. made all the difference."

"Well, you worked hard," said Harry. "I'm not sure that I deserve credit for your effort. I hope people know that they won't get better unless they try as hard as people did in the D.A. last year."

"Maybe you should mention it in your introductory lectures," suggested Hermione.

"Don't think I'm going to be doing much lecturing... but is that something I should really go out of my way to say? 'Hey, people, you won't get better unless you try'? Seems kind of obvious." Harry found that he didn't want to think about giving lectures; he just wanted to do what he'd done in the D.A.

Hermione's parents returned, and things went the way such things normally do: introductions, a tour of the house, a chat in the living room, and then dinner. Hermione's mother had offered to cook dinner, but Hermione knew that having dinner in a Muggle home was quite a novelty for Ron, Ginny, and Neville, so she wanted to avoid anything they might normally have at home or at Hogwarts. She asked her parents to get a couple of takeaway pizzas and some Cokes. Hermione and her mother had baked some chocolate chip cookies earlier in the day to have for dessert.

The pizza was a big hit with Neville and the Weasleys, and Harry as well, who hadn't had as much pizza in his life as he would have liked. They had three large pieces each, and were so full that they decided to wait until later to have the cookies. Then the Grangers went upstairs, so the kids could chat without discomfort or the oppressive feeling of close parental supervision.

Hermione started off by asking Harry to tell the whole story of what had happened with Malfoy's visit to Privet Drive, and how it had led to Dumbledore's visit and the Dursleys' increased tolerance of discussion of magic. Harry had to first explain to Neville how the Dursleys were about magic and how he was generally treated in the past, which earned him amazed looks from Neville.

All were spellbound at Harry's recounting of the tale about Dudley and Malfoy, and offered only brief interjections ("the swine!", "good for him!", "nice to see Dudley being useful for a change") throughout. They debated just how much trouble Malfoy was in, whether he might get off with a warning, whether Malfoy's family connections would do him any good now that his father was a known Death Eater, and whether he could or would argue that it was self-defense. They shared the hope that his actions could get him expelled from Hogwarts, but agreed that it was unfortunately unlikely.

Harry asked Ron about Weasley family news. "Not much that I haven't already told you by owls," Ron said. "I did just find out that Fred and George are planning on moving out soon. They've been looking for a place for a month or two, since they left Hogwarts, and they said yesterday that they've found someplace they like, it's just a matter of finalizing it."

"That'll leave only you and Ginny at home," Hermione noted. "How do your parents feel about that?"

"Well, they don't know yet. Fred and George haven't exactly been on the best terms with Mum lately. She was really upset when they left Hogwarts before they graduated."

"They should get a Special Award for Services to the School, if you ask me," said Harry, "for what they did to Umbridge." The others laughed; Harry continued, "Seriously, they probably kept her off balance and occupied, so she couldn't make whatever changes she might have been planning sooner."

"We agree with you, Harry, and we tried to tell Mum how helpful they'd been, but she places less value on that than she does on a diploma," said Ginny. "She wasn't there, she doesn't know how it was with Umbridge there. I mean, if even Hermione was encouraging rebellion, you know things were bad."

"It's not only that," Ron continued, "but she's unhappy about the shop, too. Don't worry, Harry, she's not unhappy with you specifically for giving them the money to start it. She reckons you'd been through a serious trauma and weren't thinking straight." Harry started to protest, but Ron cut him off with a gesture. "I know, it was nothing like that, but I think Mum doesn't want to be angry at you, so she came up with a reason why it wasn't your fault. They told her that you practically forced it on them-"

"Which was true," Harry cut in.

"-but Mum had decided that it was their fault, and nothing was going to change her mind. Anyway, things were kind of tense between her and them when they got home. They're not happy with her, either, because they reckon-and Ginny and I agree, of course-that they've done nothing wrong. There was a bit of a blow-up a few days after Ginny and I got back. I guess Mum had made one comment too many, and Fred said, 'I suppose you'd still have us take a leaf from Percy's book?' And George said, 'There's things more important than how far you get in the Ministry. At least Dad understands that.'"

Harry winced, and Ginny nodded. "Yeah, it was pretty bad. They were right, though. You'd think Mum would take a lesson from what happened with Percy. I think she just had to take some time to get used to their dropping out and the shop, but they were getting tired of her picking at them. I don't blame them. I think they've made up since that happened, and Mum's trying not to comment on it so much. But she's still not happy, and they know it, so they want to get out. I'm glad they can afford to do it."

"How does your father feel about the shop?" asked Hermione.

"He's not bothered at all," said Ginny. "Whatever they do is fine with him, which only upsets Mum all the more. But Mum puts more stock in accomplishments and honors and things like that. She was so pleased at Ron's Outstanding Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L. that she's forgotten she ever told us not to be a part of the D.A. Just wait until she hears you're a teacher, Harry, she'll have kittens."

"Yes, more hugging," quipped Harry. "Part of the dangerous life I lead."

"Well, let's watch the movie, shall we?" Hermione said, reaching for the tape and putting it in the videotape recorder. She started the movie after explaining to Ron, Ginny, and Neville how the machines and the tapes worked. When Ron caught on, he said to Harry, "Ah, kind of like the Omni-view, isn't it?" Harry agreed, and thanked Ron for the present.

They watched the movie in silence, except for a pause for Hermione to explain as best she could how special effects worked. Hermione's mother came downstairs halfway through the movie and made them buttered popcorn. It turned out that while popcorn tended not to be served at Hogwarts, it was common enough in the magical world, and the one who had eaten it least was Harry.

After the movie, as they were eating the cookies with milk, Hermione asked Harry why Dudley had asked her about Harry's close shaves on the phone. "Why is he so interested all of a sudden?"

"I'm not sure," Harry said. "It was almost like turning a switch. Whatever it is, all of a sudden my being magical doesn't bother him at all. It's very strange, I can tell you that. That's probably why I said yes when he asked about the Snackbox; I was startled because he'd never asked me for anything before."

"Maybe," Ron suggested, "it all sounds glamorous to him. Exotic, strange creatures, brushes with death... he doesn't see the other side of it. You know, worry, nightmares, that kind of thing." He picked up another cookie.

"You've had nightmares about the stuff we've gotten ourselves into?" Harry asked, surprised. He hadn't known that.

"I'd be surprised if any of us hadn't," said Hermione. "The mind has to deal with this stuff somehow, and if we don't talk or think about it, it'll come out in dreams."

"Well, maybe the three of us, but maybe not Neville or Ginny, they haven't done as much stuff as we have," said Ron.

"Oh, right, having Voldemort take you over and use your body against your will, no, that's nothing to get bothered enough about to have nightmares," Ginny said with annoyance.

"Well, then, how about you, Neville?" tried Ron.

Neville gulped. "Well, this isn't like wake-up-screaming scary, but... I've had the same dream a few times since then. I'm at the Department of Mysteries, in that room where Dumbledore found us, and I'm holding the prophecy, but in the dream, the prophecy has my name on it, not Harry's..."

Harry's heart almost stopped. Neville could have no way of knowing that the initial prophecy was ambiguous enough that the subject could have been him instead of Harry. Was Neville's unconscious mind giving him accurate information? Or was it just a strange coincidence?

"...and at some point it pops out of my hands and flies across the room, and into the... what do you call that thing, like a gateway... that thing that Sirius fell through when he died... I'm sorry, Harry..."

Harry shook his head and made a 'don't worry, go ahead' gesture.

"Well, you know what I'm talking about... anyway, it went through that, and disappeared, and I started walking over, following it. I was walking up the steps to the gateway, and I heard these voices telling me to cross through it, it was my destiny, the prophecy said I would. I pass through it and suddenly I'm falling, and that's when I wake up."

No one said anything for a moment as Neville looked at their faces for reactions. Finally Ginny said, "I don't know about you, but I'd say that qualifies as a nightmare. I mean, basically, you're dreaming about your own death."

"Yes, and it makes sense, since you saw someone die there," Hermione said, quickly casting an apologetic glance at Harry, "and you could have died yourself. Have you thought consciously about the fact that you could easily have died?"

"Oh, yeah, once or twice..." Neville said, making a poor attempt to feign a casual attitude. Then, giving up the pretense, he added, "... a day..." He grinned nervously.

"Well, it's hardly surprising, since you had the hardest time of anyone there, except Harry," said Hermione. "I mean, you were tortured... how can that not affect your dreams?"

"That's the strange thing; being tortured hasn't come into my dreams at all," said Neville. "I agree, you'd think it would. I mean, I think about it when I'm awake at times... daydreams about what I'd like to do to Bellatrix Lestrange before she dies a horrible and painful death." The others all looked at Neville sympathetically; they knew this very uncharacteristic attitude was because she had caused Neville untold pain, both last month and when he was a baby. "But I imagine you must too, Harry, she did something awful to you, too..."

"Actually, Neville, I haven't thought about her that much. I agree, you'd think I would... I don't know, maybe it's because I..." He trailed off. He hadn't intended to tell anyone about this, but the tone of the conversation was confessional, and they all had been with him there, they would understand... he felt a need to unburden himself.

They were looking at him expectantly. "You have to promise to tell no one this, absolutely no one," he said. They nodded as if to say of course, you don't need to tell us that. He swallowed and went on. "After seeing her kill Sirius, I think I was in denial for a few minutes. I thought he was coming back. When it finally started hitting me that he wasn't, I think I just went into a blind fury." The others looked at him anxiously. "After she escaped from the room, I screamed, said I'd kill her, something like that, and went after her. I don't know what I expected to do; I'm no match for her, but I wasn't thinking. I entered the lobby as she was at the end of it. She threw a spell, I think it was a Killing Curse, at me, which I dodged, hid behind something. She taunted me, doing that baby voice she did earlier. 'Did you loooove him?'" He shook his head, in anger again from the memory of it. "The next thing I knew, I leaped out from where I was hiding, pointed the wand at her, and yelled..." he paused for a few seconds, "... Crucio."

The others gaped; their mouths hung open and their eyes were wider than Harry thought they could get. In an absurd, random thought at a time such as this, Harry thought, I really wish I had a camera right now.

Hermione was the first to speak. "Oh, my God... oh, Harry..." She broke into sobs and leaned into him, crying on his shoulder and holding onto him. Harry was bewildered; this wasn't a reaction he expected. He put his arm around her shoulder in a comforting gesture, feeling that it was very strange that he should need to.

After a few seconds, she started sniffling and trying to stop crying. Ginny leaped up to get a box of tissues, and put them in front of Hermione. Haltingly, Hermione said to Harry, "I'm sorry, I know this is strange, but I just... I was empathizing with you through the whole story, and... the fact that you did that, I know you, you would never do that, you must have been in so much pain..." She blew her nose, then continued. "I guess I went on empathy overload. I felt too much of your pain. But it makes me understand how what you did could happen. You weren't yourself."

She extricated herself from Harry and sat back up, blowing her nose one last time. Ron finally spoke. "No one else was there, were they? I mean, you could do life in Azkaban for that..." He still looked in shock.

"Yeah, I know, that was why I mentioned the bit about, you know, not saying anything..." Harry forced a small smile. "But no, no one else was there, I'm sure."

"He'd never be convicted anyway," argued Ginny, "considering the circumstances."

"Whether that's true or not, obviously it was the farthest thing from my mind at the time. I do know that the Muggle courts say that to be convicted of a crime, you have to have been mentally competent when you committed it. I'm pretty sure I wasn't."

"What happened then?" asked Neville. "Did it work?"

"For less than a second," Harry said. "She screamed and went down, but got right back up again. She told me it was obvious I'd never done that before, and that to do it so it lasts you have to be focusing on wanting to inflict pain, you have to enjoy it." He paused, thinking. "I hope to hell I never get that bad off, that I could do that."

"You won't, Harry," Hermione said fervently. "I promise you, you won't."

He nodded. "I was sort of afraid to tell you about it, afraid of what you'd think of me," he admitted. "It's a horrible thing to do, whatever the reason."

"C'mon, Harry," said Ginny. "We know who you are, and it's different from a few seconds of madness in a horrible situation. We know you."

"Yeah, Ginny's right," echoed Ron. "We know that's not who you are."

Harry looked troubled; he had been focused on having lost Sirius recently and hadn't thought about this incident so much. "But it's obviously at least some small part of who I am, if even in that state of mind, I could do it. It's there, somewhere."

"It's there in all of us, Harry," Hermione said. "We're all capable of something like that, or worse. It's part of being human, of having free will. You can't judge yourself by a lapse of control at an unbelievably stressful moment; the human mind can only take so much, and the death of a loved one is the most stressful moment in a person's life. To have that person's killer taunt you about what she'd done, about the loss you suffered... is a provocation almost beyond imagining. Next to that, what you did... seems understandable."

"To me, especially," Neville said grimly.

"She taunted you, too," Harry said quietly. "About your parents. Before she tortured you."

The others looked shocked again; they hadn't known what Bellatrix had said to Neville.

"And if I'd had a wand, and had enough magical ability to think that the Cruciatus Curse would do any good, I'm almost certain I would have done it, maybe sustainably. I don't know," said Neville. "But it wouldn't surprise me at all."

"That woman is evil, just plain evil," said Ron, disgustedly. "And at least half mad, too, she kept losing control, Malfoy's dad had to keep holding her back."

"What happened after that, Harry? Was that when You-Know..." Neville sighed. "I guess I'd better get used to saying it...was that when... Voldemort arrived?"

"No, that was a few minutes later. She kept trying to get the prophecy, she didn't know that it had broken. I told her that it was broken; she didn't believe me, she kept trying to Summon it. I taunted her, saying her boss would be angry. She cried out to Voldemort, pleading with him not to punish her. I said, he's not here, he can't hear you. Then suddenly, he was there, saying. 'Can't I, Potter?' Then I just froze; I couldn't move or do anything. I don't know if it was me, or a spell of his. Then he sent the Killing Curse at me, which as you know, Dumbledore arrived just in time to block."

"What was he like, Harry?" asked Ron. "When he was facing... oh, all right... when he was facing Vol- Voldemort?"

"He was so calm, it was amazing," Harry related. "It was like he was having a casual chat with someone. No fear, no anger, just an intensity, but a subdued one, if that makes any sense. Very focused. He's talking to Voldemort-calling him 'Tom,' by the way, I guess since he knew him at Hogwarts when he was Tom Riddle-while at the same time casting and blocking spells, making sure that I'm protected. It was like he could do two or three things at once, effortlessly. It was amazing. I'm sure I could have appreciated it more if I hadn't been in such a state.

"I don't remember all of their conversation, but I do remember one thing," he continued. "Dumbledore said there are other ways to destroy a man than to kill him. Voldemort said there was nothing worse than death. Dumbledore said that one of Voldemort's greatest weaknesses was not understanding that there are things worse than death."

"I wonder what he meant," Ron mused. "What could be worse than death?"

"I don't know, but I have an idea," said Harry. He related his conversation with Dumbledore two days ago at Hogwarts about the extent to which Voldemort could be said to still be human. "So," he concluded, "maybe Dumbledore meant the way Voldemort is living now, a kind of living death, at least for Tom Riddle, who really isn't around anymore. All Voldemort is, is a body occupied by evil. But maybe Dumbledore meant something else, I don't know."

"Do you think maybe the prophecy had something to do with it? I really wish I hadn't broken it," said Neville mournfully.

"It's better that you did, Neville, trust me," said Harry confidently. "If you hadn't, he would probably have gotten it. That could have been bad."

"Well, we can't know how bad it would have been, since we don't know what it said, can we?" pointed out Ron.

Harry said nothing. Hermione looked at him and suddenly understood.

"You know... you know what it says, don't you?"

Harry thought for another minute, and nodded. He knew he had to be careful.

"How did you find out? Did you know all along?" asked Ron, with a slight undertone of being annoyed if Harry had known and not told them.

Harry shook his head. "Dumbledore had it. He told me, in his office right after all that happened, exactly what it said. As far as I know, he and I are the only two people in the world who know what it says."

There was silence for a few seconds. Then Ron burst out with, "Well, c'mon, are you going to tell us, or not?" They looked at him expectantly.

Looking at them earnestly, Harry said, "I can't. Not because Dumbledore told me not to, but because your lives would be in danger if you knew, and knowing won't help you in any practical way."

"I don't think there's any of us who aren't willing to take that risk," said Ron fervently. The others nodded.

"I'm not willing to take that risk," Harry almost shouted, taking the others aback. "I've had enough people die for me. I'm not going to have any more if I can help it. Knowing it won't help you, and it won't help you help me."

"How would knowing put us in danger?" asked Ginny.

"If he found out that you knew-and he has powers we don't understand, we can't know he wouldn't find out-you'd be targets. He'd have his Death Eaters grab you, and bring you to him. He'd force it out of you, then kill you."

"But we wouldn't..." Ron trailed off, realizing that he was wrong.

"Tell him? You would," said Neville emphatically. "Any of us would. You hear about the Cruciatus Curse, you know it's horrible, but you can't really know until you've experienced it. We can't begin to imagine that much pain. How long did they do it to me, Harry?"

"About five seconds."

Neville shuddered. "Believe me, it felt like longer than five seconds. A lot longer. There aren't enough words to describe it. Anyone would break. Or..." he trailed off, unable to finish his sentence.

"Or suffer your parents' fate," Harry finished. Neville nodded. "I can easily believe it," Harry said. "Last year, when Voldemort did it to me, I don't know how long it was, but all I could think was that I wanted to die, just so the pain would stop." He made eye contact with each of the others in turn. "I won't risk that happening to you. Not over this."

"Couldn't we just lie to him? How would he know?" asked Ron.

"Dumbledore said that both he and Voldemort are expert Legilimens, which means they know if they're being lied to," Harry responded. "Only a powerful Occlumens could lie without being detected."

"Isn't it a problem that we know that you know?" Ron pressed. "I mean, he grabs one of us, makes us tell him that you know? Isn't that worse for you?"

Harry shook his head. "If Voldemort could have gotten me, he would have by now. It's not for lack of trying. And once he gets me, the prophecy doesn't matter anymore."

"How does he even know about the prophecy, then, if he's never heard it?

"He knows a part of it. Dumbledore told me that one of his people was present and heard the first few sentences before being made to leave." Harry thought for a minute. "I guess I could tell you that part safely; he knows it, so there's no danger if you do."

They nodded in anticipation.

"Let's see, how did the first part go..." Harry struggled to remember the words as accurately as he could; he had played them back in his head several times. "'The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies.' That's as much as Voldemort knows of the prophecy."

Everyone sat quietly for a minute, trying to digest this and figure out what it meant. Then Hermione said, "Your birthday is at the end of July. When exactly was the prophecy made?"

"About sixteen years and one month ago."

"One month before you were born," said Hermione.

"What does it mean, 'thrice defied him?'" Ron asked. "What does 'defy' mean in this case?"

"I think it means 'escaped,' like they got away from him though he intended to kill them but couldn't."

"But your name isn't mentioned?" Ginny asked. "It couldn't have been anyone else?"

"It is me," Harry said, "but at the time the prophecy was made, Professor Dumbledore told me, they couldn't know for sure who it was that the prophecy referred to. He said that at that time, there were two wizard children it could have referred to. I was one."

"Did he say who the other one was?" asked Ron.

Harry wasn't sure whether he should say it, but in a fundamental way he felt Neville had the right to know. "Yes, he did," said Harry. He stared at Neville.

Neville was the last one to work out what Harry's stare meant. Hermione gasped. "You mean... the other one it could have been... was Neville?"

Harry nodded, and kept his gaze on Neville. "Your birthday is only a few days away from mine. Your parents fought Voldemort."

Neville appeared to be in complete shock. His facial expression was unmoving, staring straight ahead.

"But the prophecy had your name on it," Ginny pointed out. "So how did they know that it was you and not Neville?"

"My name was put in later," Harry said. "At first there was a question mark; they didn't know. Later events, combined with knowing the rest of the prophecy, made it clear that it was me."

"But Voldemort didn't know that, right?" asked Hermione. "When he went after you, he didn't know for sure it was you, it could have been Neville as far as he was concerned, couldn't it?"

"Yes," Harry answered. "He couldn't know. Even Dumbledore doesn't know for sure why he chose me. Maybe he was going to do both of us, and happened to try for me first. We can't know."

"Wow... this tells us enough to understand what happened to Neville a bit better," Hermione said, now looking at Neville with great sympathy. "Neville's parents were attacked shortly after you were," referring to Harry, "Voldemort was gone... but maybe his followers still weren't sure which one it was..."

"Yes, I've thought the same thing," agreed Harry. "They probably guessed it was me by then, but they probably wanted to do in Neville too, just to be sure. Maybe Neville's parents had hidden him, just in case... Lestrange and the others caught his parents, tried to make them tell them where Neville was, so they could go kill him..."

"...and if there's anyone who could refuse to crack under torture, it would be a parent trying to protect their child," Hermione finished. "They knew what would happen if they wouldn't tell, but they didn't... to protect Neville..." Hermione looked on the verge of tears again, as did Ginny. Even Ron was having a hard time keeping his face free of emotion.

"We don't know this for sure, of course," Harry said heavily. "Dumbledore didn't say that specifically, one way or the other. But it seems like it might have happened that way. It makes sense."

Neville finally reacted. He bent down towards the floor, his face in his hands, and started sobbing. The other four glanced at each other, then looked down. They knew he had more than enough reason.

Ginny, who was sitting next to Neville, moved over closer to him. She put her arm around his shoulders, and held his arm with her other hand. She kept doing so for another minute or two, until Neville had cried himself out. He took some tissues and blew his nose. "Sorry," he murmured.

"Are you kidding?" asked Ron. "I felt that way myself, and it wasn't even my family. It would be strange if you didn't react like that."

"Believe me, no one thinks any less of you," Harry assured him.

Neville nodded and slowly regained his composure. "I'm going to have to ask my gran some questions about this. Where was I, did it happen that way, maybe she doesn't know, or just hasn't told me." He looked at a clock; it was 11:45, fifteen minutes until he had to go back home. "I was going to pop back home to try to convince her to change her mind, to let me stay overnight. But now I'm just going back. I'd love to stay, but I have to find out some things."

"Boy, can I understand that," said Harry.

"Can I ask you something else about the prophecy, Harry?" Neville asked.

Harry wanted to help Neville as much as he could. "Of course. I'll answer if I think it won't be unsafe for anyone."

Neville nodded. "You said that it turned out that the prophecy was about you. Was that fixed in stone? Was it always going to be you, no matter what? Or, is it the case that, if some events had gone differently, it could have been me instead of you? Do you see what I mean?"

Harry did. "Yes, and I'm sorry, Neville, but I don't know, even knowing the whole prophecy. It could be that it was set in stone, but it could be otherwise. I'm not sure that even Dumbledore knows."

"I understand," said Neville. "Well, I think I'll go now. I'm probably not going to get much sleep tonight anyway. Got a few things to think about." He stood, then all the rest did too.

"Neville... now I'm wondering whether I should have told you this or not. Would it have been better if I hadn't?"

"Of course, Harry, you should've. I'm glad you did. I want to know as much about this as I can. It's my life, after all."

"I'm glad you feel that way," Harry said. "I felt like you deserved to know."

Neville walked over to the fireplace. "Thanks again for having me," he said to Hermione and the others.

"Thanks for coming," said Hermione. She walked up to him and patted his arm, after which Ginny did as well. He smiled, both heartened and embarrassed by the gestures of sympathy. He said goodbye, shouted his home's name, and disappeared into the fire.

'The four of them stayed up for a while, eating more cookies and talking about Neville, the prophecy, and the events at the Department of Mysteries. It was a relief for Harry to talk about it, even if it was not about Sirius specifically; talking about the events in general helped to desensitize him to dwelling on Sirius every time the Ministry of Magic or the Department of Mysteries was mentioned. They set up and got into their sleeping bags on the living room floor, talked some more, and eventually fell asleep.

The next morning at breakfast Harry told the others about his Occlumency lesson scheduled for later that day. They were happy for him that he didn't have to study with Snape, though Hermione was mildly annoyed that he hadn't mentioned it to them until then ("it's not as though there hasn't been lots of other stuff to talk about," he pointed out). Harry told them that the lesson was supposed to take place in the Burrow, which surprised Ron, as he hadn't known.

At noon, it was decided that they would all go back to the Burrow, including Hermione, who was hoping she could put in a good word for the twins with Mrs. Weasley. Harry and the Weasleys said goodbye to Hermione's parents, and they took the fireplace to the Burrow.

The Weasleys' living room was empty, which to Harry was unusual; his experience was that the house was a hub of activity. Ron's father was at his job, and Harry imagined the twins were tending their shop. They didn't see Mrs. Weasley. Harry walked over to the clock that gave the location of every Weasley; hers was on 'shopping.' "Looks like we're the only ones here, then," said Ron. They all sat down in the living room.

"So, tell us about what Dumbledore said when he told you about the Occlumency lessons," said Ron. Harry related it as best he could remember, up to where the conversation turned to Harry's teaching position. Ron took mild umbrage at Harry's description of him as unusually vulnerable to Malfoy's taunts.

"But it's true!" insisted Hermione, as Ron scoffed. "As soon as he starts saying stuff, you lunge for him, you don't even use your wand. You need to do what Professor Dumbledore says, ignore him. They're only words."

"Didn't you haul off and slap him once?" Ron reminded her.

"I'm not saying I'm perfect," she admitted. "But I usually just try to be dignified and ignore it. He always does it to you because you react so well. Harry is better; except for that incident after the Quidditch match last year, he usually ignores it or insults him back. If you can't ignore him, at least come up with some good insults to use against him for this year. You can make it a summer project."

"This is an interesting suggestion from you... a summer project that doesn't involve schoolwork," smirked Ron.

"Like there's much chance of getting you to do schoolwork in summer," she retorted.

Harry chuckled. "I've got to say, after a month of being ignored at the Dursleys', it's even good to listen to you two quibbling." Ron and Hermione laughed.

"It really must be bad there," said Ron, though of course he knew.

As 1:00 approached, Harry said, "By the way, when Dumbledore arrives, don't clear out right away. I want to ask him something with you all there."

Right on time at 1:00, Dumbledore appeared in the Weasleys' fireplace. "Ah, Harry, Hermione, Ron, Ginny, how nice to see you all. I trust you had a pleasant time last night?"

"Well, pretty much," Harry answered, "but some of it was pretty serious; we talked about the stuff that happened last month. So you couldn't say that was 'pleasant,' exactly, but it was probably a good thing." He paused. "Professor, can I ask you a few things before we start the lesson?"

"Certainly, Harry," Dumbledore said. "Go ahead."

"When we were talking about the Department of Mysteries, there was a point when Hermione figured out that I knew what the prophecy was." Dumbledore looked concerned. "I wouldn't tell them what it said; I didn't want to put them in unnecessary danger."

"Although we tried to get him to," admitted Ron.

"But I did decide that it was okay to tell them the part of the prophecy that Voldemort already knew, since they couldn't get in trouble from that. I thought it couldn't add to their danger. Do you think that was all right, or should I not have even done that much?"

Dumbledore thought for a moment. "It is not an easy question to answer. On the one hand, the less information disseminated about the prophecy, the better, and one cannot be faulted for being too cautious. But for friendships to be close, confidences must be shared, and this prophecy weighs heavily on Harry. I am sure Harry would have liked to tell you all and share his burden, and I know you would have wanted to help him. But he is right, it is too dangerous for you to know. I would say that what he did seems like an appropriate balance."

"It was pretty hard for Neville to hear," said Ginny. "It was easy to understand why. We all felt awful for him. Is what we think true? Did his parents lose their minds protecting him?"

"We will probably never know," said Dumbledore. "The only people in a position to know are the perpetrators. But it stands to reason."

Harry looked puzzled. "But when I saw that scene in the Pensieve, Crouch-the father-said that they were trying to get information on where Voldemort was."

"Yes, that was what was assumed at the time," Dumbledore confirmed. "But the younger Crouch denied involvement, and the other three were disinclined to give any information as to their motivations. I was the only one who knew the prophecy, and I did not wish to make it public, feeling it was likely that Voldemort would rise again. And to have told you that they might have had another motivation for their attack on Neville's parents would have meant telling you of the prophecy, which I was not ready to do, to my regret. I should have recognized at the time that fate was providing me a perfect opportunity to do what I knew, even then, I should have done." He paused. "And what was your second question, Harry?"

"I was wondering if it would be okay if they joined the Occlumency lessons with me," said Harry. "Not that they especially need it, of course, but if they're willing, it would help me a lot. I didn't do very well with it last year, and I thought part of the reason might be that I didn't have anyone I could share the experience with, who could know exactly what I'd been through."

Dumbledore looked at the others, asking them a silent question. They all nodded. "Normally I would hesitate, Harry, as lessons for four may necessitate a different approach than lessons for one, and your situation is unique. But you make a good point about the advantages of companions. I warn you, however, that some aspects of this may involve things that are quite personal being shared or known. Does this disturb any of you?"

Three heads shook as one, and Ron shook his a second later, looking embarrassed that he was the only one who hesitated. "I did not think it would," continued Dumbledore, "but it was necessary to ask. Well, shall we get down to it, or did you have another question?"

"Yes, Professor," said Harry. "When we were talking in your office a few days ago, you said, 'One of the great but not well understood truths of life is that what we do to another, we do to ourselves.' What does that mean, exactly? That's not literally true, is it?"

"In a physical sense, no, but it is real enough nonetheless. One could say that it is psychically true, or spiritually true. If you do a kindness for another, one done with no thought of compensation or expectation, you feel better about yourself. So, in essence, you have done a kindness to yourself. If you harm another, it is because you yourself have been harmed. A perfectly content and happy person would never deliberately harm another; the thought would never occur. The harm that you do another comes from the harm that has been done to you, and reinforces it. Doing harm becomes acceptable, and a cycle of harm is perpetuated. This is very damaging, so in harming another, you harm yourself. If you kill another, you do not literally kill yourself, but you kill a part of yourself-the part that can look in the mirror and not be disturbed. You have done something to another that can never be rectified, and the damage to yourself can never be fully repaired. I could give more examples, but I think you understand my point. Does that answer your question?"

"Yes, I guess so," Harry said. "I had never thought of it that way before, but it makes sense. I asked because last night I was telling them about what happened in the Department of Mysteries, after Sirius died, when I chased after Bellatrix Lestrange. I didn't tell you this, but at one point after I caught up with her, she taunted me about Sirius, and I lost all control. I-"

"I was aware of it, Harry. Even though I was not in the room, I am sensitive to... certain types of spells within a certain radius, and that one was impossible not to notice. I assume that you are now thinking of your action in terms of what I said, that your action may have caused grievous harm to yourself?" Harry nodded again.

"I would say that you are right to be concerned, and that the very fact that you are concerned is reason to think that you should not be overly concerned. The primary factor to consider here is the overwhelming stress you were under. It is literally difficult to imagine more stressful circumstances. I would be deeply concerned if you had done what you did with forethought and deliberate intent, or if you had been able to sustain the spell. I assume the spell's effects were brief?"

"Yes, very brief. She told me that you have to enjoy inflicting pain to make it work for any length of time. She almost seemed pleased that I'd done it, now that I think about it."

"I would hardly be surprised. What you did could be described as a small step in the direction of the Dark forces. No doubt she would have been pleased to see you make more steps in that direction. That is how people end up as Dark wizards, in many cases: a succession of small steps, moral compromises, ignoring of the conscience, and a slowly growing lust for power and dominance. That is how it sometimes happens. But it can also happen another way: if a person suffers a terrible loss or defeat and succumbs to the darkness instead of fighting his way through it, the transformation to darkness can be very rapid. Bellatrix Lestrange may have been hoping that would happen with you, her taunting designed to push you along such a path. She informed you of how to make the pain caused by the spell last longer to give you incentive to try again. If I may ask, what were the exact words of her taunt?"

Harry told him; Dumbledore nodded somberly. "I am not surprised. Like their master, the Death Eaters see love as insipid, useless, a weakness. He trains them to banish it, to despise it. She wanted you to see it as a weakness, to feel ashamed of it. Banishing love is another step towards darkness. Now, bear in mind, the word 'love' is often misunderstood as referring only or primarily to romantic love. Love is equally appropriately used to describe bonds of friendship, closeness, and affection. There is a famous Muggle quote: 'No greater love hath a man for his fellow man than that he lay down his life for him.' The love you felt for Sirius was so great that the pain of losing him was equally great, and it was this pain that she hoped to capitalize on.

"To get back to the original thrust of your question, you did cause yourself harm by your actions, but it was a temporary harm. It was of a cautionary nature, the type in which a child touches a hot stove and so learns not to do so again. I think it is highly likely that if you ever found yourself in a similar situation, you would not do what you did this time. Not because you would consciously choose differently-you did not consciously choose in this incident-but you would unconsciously choose differently."

Harry fervently hoped that Dumbledore was right. He was willing to take it on faith for the time being, as he was with anything Dumbledore said. "Thank you, Professor." Dumbledore tilted his head in acknowledgment.

"Shall we begin the Occlumency lesson, then?" Dumbledore asked. Harry and the others exchanged glances and nodded. Dumbledore conjured four cushiony, comfortable chairs and gestured them to sit, which they did.

"Firstly, Harry, I would like you to describe in some detail the nature of the lessons you received from Professor Snape last year. It will help me in choosing where to start." Harry spent the next five minutes giving Dumbledore the highlights of his lessons with Snape, and Snape's methods. Harry thought he saw Dumbledore's face cloud up a few times during the account, which was remarkable, because Dumbledore almost never showed any negative emotion. He soon discovered that he wasn't the only one who had noticed.

"Thank you, Harry," said Dumbledore. "I now have a good idea of where to begin. Yes, Hermione?" he asked, seeing her hand in the air.

"Professor, you don't approve of what Professor Snape did with Harry, do you? I could see it in your face, and that's very rare for you."

He nodded. "You are quite perceptive, Hermione. But yes, I am human, and my feelings will show in my face from time to time. I would have preferred that these did not, because a fundamental rule of teaching at Hogwarts is that teachers do not criticize each other in front of students. But your question deserves an answer.

"No, I do not approve of how Professor Snape handled Harry's lessons. The largest problem was that he simply told Harry to clear his mind, without giving any specific instruction on how to do so. There are methods, disciplines, practices, which Professor Snape knows. He seems to have utilized a 'learn by doing' approach. His approach is technically defensible; no doubt there are some instances in which it could work. But I do not think he chose this method because he thought it would be efficacious."

"In other words, he did it so that he could have an excuse to beat up on Harry mentally," said Ron angrily.

"I would not put it that way, Ron, but I can see why you would," allowed Dumbledore. "Professor Snape may well have thought that his way was best. I cannot know his intentions for certain."

"But you suspect them, or you wouldn't be upset about it," Hermione noted.

"I would be disturbed in any case, because the instruction Harry received was counterproductive," Dumbledore explained, not exactly addressing Hermione's comment. "It is a necessary part of learning Occlumency that the instructor attempt to break into the student's mind; practice is as necessary as learning theory. But I will not do so here for at least three or four lessons. First, I will attempt to help build the skills that will enable you to clear your minds. This will help you gain greater confidence when we do actual practice."

Dumbledore then proceeded with the lesson, explaining the fundamentals of relaxation, clearing one's mind, and dealing with distractions. He had them try it for a minute or two three times. He asked them how well they felt they did and what their problems were. After a little over an hour, he called a halt.

"I think that will do for now," he said. "We will resume on Wednesday, the same time and place. In the meantime, I urge you to practice clearing your minds at least three or four times a day, and especially before going to bed. It is not only useful for the sake of the class, but also for your general well-being." Dumbledore then bade them farewell and departed.

Harry was the first to speak. "Well, that was way better than any class I had with Snape, to put it mildly. It actually left me feeling more like I might be able to clear my mind, not less."

"He was really upset about what Snape did to you, I could tell," said Hermione. "For him, that was practically an emotional outburst. I'd love to be a fly on the wall when he talks to Snape about it."

"Snape'll just lie, and deny that he wanted to harm Harry," pointed out Ron.

"Could he lie to Dumbledore?" asked Ginny.

"It's hard to say," said Harry. "I wouldn't think so, because this is Dumbledore. But then again, we think Snape's serving as a spy for the Order, which would mean that he could lie to Voldemort. And if he can do that, maybe he can lie to Dumbledore."

"I don't know... I'd never bet against Dumbledore being able to overcome any wizard's magic," said Ron.

"Good point," agreed Harry.

"Well, what do you think, Harry?" asked Ron. "D'you want to hang out here for a while, maybe have dinner with us? Or do you think the Dursleys'll miss you if you come home late?"

"I don't know... I hadn't really thought about it. They don't care whether I'm there or not, for the most part, so long as I don't bother them. On the other hand, I don't know what their reaction will be if I come traipsing through the fireplace at, say, 10:30 when they're watching the telly. I just hate to go back; it's like volunteering to step into a prison when you could be free. I don't know what I should do."

"I hate to say it, Harry," said Hermione, "but the prudent thing to do is to go home now, or at least in a few hours, maybe 4:00 or 4:30. Definitely before your uncle gets home, whenever that is."

"That's usually around quarter to six," supplied Harry.

"Okay, no later than five, then. Sometime tonight, explain your situation with the Occlumency lessons, and say that some days you'd like to stay over at the Weasleys' for dinner, and ask what they think would be a good time for you to come home. Because you don't want to disturb them by using the fireplace when they're watching TV, and so on."

"Or, I could come home at two a.m., when they're in bed for sure," joked Harry. "No, I suppose you're right. I'll try it your way."

"That's great, Harry. Did you hear that, Ron? Harry said, 'No, I suppose you're right. I'll try it your way.' You ought to give that a try once in a while, too," teased Hermione.

Ron gave her a 'very funny' look. "I'll be sure to do that, Hermione. Just as soon as I get through reading 'Hogwarts: A History.' Should be any day now."

"Is anybody else hungry?" asked Ginny, derailing Ron and Hermione.

It turned out that they all were, so they trooped into the kitchen to see what was around. They ate, then talked for a while. Eventually, regretfully, Harry headed back to Privet Drive.