Metamorphoses

Metamorphoses

Chapter 3: Wings

It was not hard for Severus to avoid Remus and his new Gryffindor friends during the next few days. Their class had been kept busy with homework -- their teachers had not been stingy with those, even if they had only just started their first term at school. He had caught a few glimpses of Remus at mealtimes, and sometimes in the Library, but Remus had been busy with other things, and Severus was not sure if Remus even saw him.

Severus's conscience had been nagging at him ever since he snubbed Remus at the Great Hall after the Welcoming Feast. He wanted to apologize, but had not gathered enough courage to face Remus yet. He was afraid of how Remus would act towards him after what he did, especially now that Remus had spent considerable time with Hogwarts' new resident bullies, Sirius and James.

Thankfully, Severus was spared from dwelling on the situation too much. He had brought three antique books with him to school, and they had so intrigued his new roommate, Seth Avery, that the boy had taken it upon himself to abduct Severus every free time they had. Seth dragged him off to the Library, or their dormitory, to pore over the books with him, as Severus was not keen on lending them out. They were part of his father's treasured collection of ancient volumes, and had been given to Severus as a gift when he got accepted to Hogwarts. ("These will serve to complement your studies," his father had said at the time, looking at Severus as if he needed all the complementing he can get. "Take care of them well. They are much older than you." He did not have to add "And more valuable," for Severus to get the exact gist of what he was really saying).

"Get a load of this," Seth said, pointing at an illustration of a huge cauldron with rats, twigs, and what was probably a wizard, in a configuration that made Severus's stomach turn. "I didn't realize this was even possible!"

They were at a secluded corner of the Library, hidden from Madam Pince's view by the towering History of Magic shelf, but Severus still cast a glance around to make sure that she had not heard Seth's outburst.

"Yes, well. It's just making me hungry. What time is it, anyway?" Severus whispered, feigning disinterest. The most revolting things were always the ones that fascinated Seth. And although Severus thought he was fairly thick-skinned, it was apparently not thick enough for some of Seth's morbid ideas.

Seth looked at his bronze pocket watch, which looked even more antiquated than Severus's books. "It's almost lunch. Come on, let's go to the Hall. I'm a bit hungry, myself." He gathered his things and stood, walking to the doors without looking behind, seemingly fully confident that Severus would be right behind him.

Severus rolled his eyes, stuffed the books in his bag, and followed Seth out of the Library. In his hurry, the underside of his bag snagged on a tusk of the boar-shaped gargoyle guarding the entrance. It ripped open, scattering all of his things to the floor.

"Drat," Severus said, frowning at the mess. "You go ahead. I have to bring these books up to our room first. I'll catch up with you at the Hall," he said to Seth.

"Won't you need help with those?" Seth asked.

Severus shook his head, squatting on the floor to gather his things. He could feel Seth watching him, probably deciding whether to lend a hand or not.

"If you're sure," Seth eventually said. "But don't be too long. I'll save you a seat."

Severus nodded distractedly; he was wondering how he could carry all of his things up to his room with the gaping hole on his bag. He collected them into a pile, but small items (like his inkbottles and Magic White-Out) kept rolling away. He could still feel Seth standing behind him, and he finally decided to accept the boy's offer to help. Severus twisted to face him, a sheepish smile on his face. "Hey, I think I need your help after all..."

He stopped in mid-sentence, his mouth hanging open in disbelief. Seth had gone, and the person standing behind him was --

"Well, well. Interesting books you seem to have here, Severus Snape," Sirius drawled, looming over Severus, his mouth curling at the last word, as if it had a bitter taste he wanted to spit out. He picked up Severus's volume of Forbidden Spells: A Theoretical Discourse by Tituba Mather, and showed the cover to his friend James, who had then bent over and snatched Severus's other books as well.

As James straightened up, he shuffled through the books. "20th Century Approach to Mediaeval Blood Magic... Moste Potente Potions... Why, Severus, are you perhaps attending a special DARK ARTS COURSE that the rest of us aren't?" James asked, his voice loud enough to be heard by every student in the corridor.

No, no, no, no... I'm having a nightmare. This isn't really happening, Severus thought desperately. He thought he had gotten away from them, after being ignored for several days, but it looked like they did not forget too easily. Feeling extremely vulnerable scrunched down on the floor with the two looking down on him, Severus quickly stashed his things in his broken bag and stood. A few small items fell off, but Severus ignored them. He clutched the bag to his chest, in part to prevent it from bursting open and sending all of his things to the floor again, in part as an involuntary reflex to armor himself against the onslaught that were Sirius and James.

Many students stopped what they were doing to watch the scene.

"Hand them back," Severus said, holding out a hand to the two. He tried his best to keep his face blank, but was irritated to see that his hand was shaking visibly. He snatched his hand back to his chest, clutching at his bag tightly. "Hand them back, or...or..."

"Or what, Nancy-boy? Will you whip out your ickle wand and give us a good curse?" Sirius challenged.

"Wouldn't put it past him," James agreed, nodding and surveying the audience that had gathered to watch them.

"Know more curses than most seventh years, don't you, Big, Bad Nancy-boy?"

Severus's fear disappeared, slowly replaced by a boiling anger, as their accusations began to sink in. Curses? Dark Arts? What were they trying to imply? How dare they? They hardly even knew him! If there were any evil in this place, it was them!

Taking deep breaths, Severus slowly lifted his chin up so that his nose was angled to the ceiling, and gave the boys a plastic smile. "Yes, sure. Of course, since I've just got my first real wand less than a week ago, I've had to cast evil hexes with my training wand all through primary school," he said, in a low, clipped voice.

Tentative scattered laughter sounded in the corridor. Sirius's face colored, but James only calmly stared at Severus, his eyes unblinking behind his glasses, making him look like an owl studying its prey.

James took an insolent step forward. "Considering your background, Severus -"

"What's going on here?" a loud, authoritative voice spoke.

When Severus looked up, he saw that the voice belonged to the Slytherin Prefect, whose name he had since learned was Lucius Malfoy. He was marching towards them, his expression as pleased as a cat that just caught three mice in the act of stealing cheese. Their audience slowly disappeared upon his arrival at the scene, leaving the four of them alone.

Lucius halted in front of them, turning so sharply that his platinum, chin-length locks spread like a lady's fan flicking open, before settling back down on his head. His steely gaze flashed briefly to Severus before lingering on James and Sirius.

"Well?" he asked the two.

Sirius shrugged and smiled at Lucius, his eyes wide and liquid, as though he did not have any idea what the older boy was talking about. James, who managed to maintain his calm and unreadable expression, arranged the controversial books in a neat stack on his arms and held them out to Severus.

"We were just helping him pick up his books," he announced in a clear voice, patting Severus lightly on one shoulder. "We'll see you around. Be careful next time, okay?" he said to Severus, smiling angelically, before walking away with his friend.

Lucius stared at their backs, his mouth twisted in obvious dislike. Severus decided to go on his way before the Prefect's freezing gaze landed on him, too.

***

Severus mulled over the events in his head as he hurried to the dungeons, where the Slytherin dormitories were. He was now more puzzled than angered, trying to understand why Sirius and James attacked him like that. And it was an attack, rather than their usual attention-seeking bullying. Severus was quite certain that he was not the only one who noticed the difference. The only time Severus heard their audience laugh was when he made the sarcastic remark about his training wand; and even this was subdued, as though they laughed only to acknowledge his wit, and not because they felt any kind of enjoyment at what was happening.

He thought back on every incident that he came into contact with the two, thinking perhaps that he had done something that offended them; but he could not remember doing anything, or acting in any way, that could make them single him out for this kind of treatment. And what exactly had they meant with their Dark Arts comment, and 'Severus's background?' What background was that? Why would they think he knew any curses? Just because he carried those books? It was not like Severus was the only student who had access to adult material. Why, just the other day, Madame Pince confiscated illustrated volumes of Sex Magick from a group of Gryffindors! Surely, those books were worse than the ones Severus's father gave him.

Hypocritical buggers, the lot of them, Severus thought. He wished he had known some curses, though. He did not miss the implied threat in James's parting words, and he vowed never again to be caught unprepared. Besides, he would just love to make James and Sirius suffer a bit. Thoughts of Sirius's thick hair going up in flames, and James's eyes popping out of their sockets began running through Severus's head, bringing a satisfied smirk on his face.

"SEVERUS!" a voice suddenly blasted into his ear, almost causing him to let go of the bag clutched to his chest. It was just then that he became aware of two boys flanking him. And the one on his right, the boy who screamed at his ear, was Remus.

Severus stopped walking, and carefully lifted a finger to poke Remus between the eyes. He wanted to make sure Remus was not just a vision caused by his earlier psychological trauma.

"Ouch, hey!" Remus said.

Severus smiled then, joyfully shoving James and Sirius to the very back of his mind. Remus, here! And not looking angry with him at all!

"We've been walking with you for almost the whole length of the corridor now, and you didn't even notice!" Peter said. He was the one walking on Severus's left side.

"Remus, Peter," Severus greeted them. "Many thanks for blasting my eardrum to pieces, by the way."

Remus laughed.

Remus laughs at every little thing. Severus had almost forgotten all about that.

"We were planning on having lunch by the lake. Want to come with us?" Remus asked, supplementing his invitation with a sharp tug on Severus's sleeve.

"It'll be fun, Severus! See, we already took some food from the Hall," Peter piped in, shoving a wicker basket in front of Severus's nose.

Smells of warm bread and something roasted wafted from the basket, making Severus's mouth water. If Remus's presence had not already made the picnic impossible to refuse, these delicious food-smells surely did.

Remus was looking at Severus with a hopeful expression, still not relinquishing his hold on his sleeve.

"Er... is it alright if I bring a friend along? Seth Avery - one of my roommates -- he's waiting for me at the Great Hall," Severus asked.

Remus's grip on Severus's sleeve relaxed, and his face brightened considerably at Severus's acceptance. Severus was taken aback by his reaction. Had Remus actually been afraid that Severus would turn him down?

"Sure! The more, the merrier," Remus said. "Meet us near the flutterby bushes; we just need to run to our dorms for a sec."

"And try to score more food!" Peter called out, as he and Remus ran to the Gryffindor Tower.

***

A few minutes later, Severus walked out of the castle carrying a paper bag filled with chocolate mint creams and sugar nuggets. He took a roundabout route to get to their meeting place, giving wide berth to the newly-planted Willow, which was currently whomping at the rocks James and Sirius were lobbing at it.

Stupid gits, Severus thought, silently cheering on the Willow to land a blow (or ten) to the two boys harassing it. He hurried on to the flutterby bushes, where Remus and Peter were waving chicken legs frantically at him.

"Sorry if I kept you waiting, I had to drop my stuff off at the dungeons first," Severus said, throwing his paper bag to Peter and sitting gingerly down on the slightly damp grass.

"Here," Remus said, handing him a roasted chicken leg and a slice of corn bread. "Where's your friend?"

"He was already done eating when I got to the Great Hall," Severus answered, pretending to be concentrating on taking huge bites off his chicken. Seth had not wanted to go when he learned that Severus was having lunch with Gryffindors, but Severus did not intend to tell Remus that.

"Too bad. Maybe next time, then," Remus said.

"James and Sirius couldn't make it either," Peter added. "We went up to the Tower to fetch them, but they said they had some things they needed to do."

"Ha! They're over there, entertaining the masses by tormenting the Whomping Willow," Severus informed them, nodding his head to the general direction of the tree.

"Groovy!" Peter gushed, craning his head to catch a glimpse. Severus forced down the scowl that was threatening to appear on his face.

Remus stayed silent, but his brows were creased in a frown. So, it seems Remus hasn't taken to idolizing his popular friends, unlike almost everyone else in school, Severus mused. Severus wanted to hug him.

"Oh! I almost forgot. I got this from the Tower as well," Remus said, twisting around to reach for something behind him. It turned out to be Severus's sleeping blue cat.

"Cat!" Severus exclaimed. "I'd been wondering where he goes off to when he disappears." Severus took the cat from Remus and placed it gently on his own lap. It mewled once, but otherwise did not show any signs of waking.

Remus tickled Cat's belly. "She follows me around sometimes. This morning, I woke up at my bed and found her cuddled by my feet."

Severus swatted his cat tenderly on the ear. "Traitor," he whispered to it jokingly. It was highly unusual for his cat to show affection to anyone else, but then again, his cat had never met anyone like Remus before, either.

"I didn't know you liked cats," Peter said between gulps of carrot juice. He tried to tempt Cat with a bit of chicken, but she did not even open her eyes. Throwing the untouched chicken to the lake, Peter said, "Speaking of, have you had Professor McGonagall yet? She can turn herself into a tabby! With spectacle-markings and everything!"

Severus nodded enthusiastically, nibbling on a piece of bread. "We had Transfigurations yesterday. I can't believe an Animagus is teaching in our school! Who would have thought something that neat could happen here?"

"Yeah, it's so far out, isn't it?" Remus added, straightening up, his eyes as wide as they could possibly go.

"Oh, oh, oh!" Peter gushed, bobbing up and down, "Do you think she'll teach us how to become Animagi? Because I was thinking I'd want to turn into something that can fly, like maybe an eagle or something." He spread his arms wide and flapped them around like wings.

Severus thought he looked more like an earthbound penguin than an eagle in flight. Quelling his urge to laugh, Severus thought about what he wanted to transform into. "I think I'd prefer to change into something nocturnal. An owl maybe, but then I'm not really good at flying... Probably a wolf..."

"A wolf!" Remus said, his grin getting even wider. "Really?"

"Of course, really! Who wouldn't want the ability to roam over the forest, under the moonlight, every night?"

"I guess I hadn't thought of that. But wouldn't people be scared of you?"

"Why would they? If I met someone like that, I wouldn't be scared. Besides, who cares? Wolves are so far out," Severus said, imitating Remus's elongated way of saying the last phrase.

Remus smiled. "Yeah," he said slowly, a satisfied look on his face.

They lounged lazily on the grass, smiling at each other and nibbling contentedly on chocolate mint creams and sugar nuggets.

"I'm beginning to think Transfigurations will be my favorite course," Remus said, lying down on his back, using his arms for a pillow.

"Mine, too," Peter agreed.

"What's your favorite so far, Severus?"

Severus hesitated before answering. "Er... Potions," he said, his voice sounding apologetic even to his ears. He was aware that most students considered Potions nerdy.

Remus levered himself up on one arm to look at Severus. "I see. Why Potions, then?"

Severus shrugged. As far back as he could remember, he had always enjoyed working with mixtures and draughts. Maybe he liked the unforgiving exactness of it. There was nothing remotely subjective, or biased, or vague, about Potions-making.

"Well?" Remus prodded, still apparently waiting for an answer from Severus.

"Because I'm pretty good at it, I guess. I spoke with Professor Jigger yesterday, and he said he was thinking of giving me advanced Potions coursework next term." Severus tried to keep his voice from sounding too proud.

"Wow," Remus said.

"Yeah, wow. That was pretty cruel of him, giving you extra load," Peter said, his face scrunching up in disgust.

Remus looked at Severus and grinned as Severus rolled his eyes. "Anyway, I don't think it's all that uncommon, Peter," Remus said. "I heard our Defense teacher has been talking to a first year girl about special sessions on crystal protection charms. They're supposed to be really powerful."

"That must be Moira," Severus said. "She's in Slytherin, too. You should see her wand -- it's pure clear crystal, and looks so fragile I keep expecting it to shatter at the simplest spell. Her family is heavily into crystals. Here, look, she even gave me this." Severus loosened the neck of his school robes to pull at a leather cord looped around his neck. Hanging from it was a clear, trapezoid-shaped crystal pendant, only slightly larger than a fingernail.

Remus sat up and moved closer to Severus, reaching out his hand to gently cradle the delicate-looking crystal. "What does it do?" he asked.

"Moira said it protects me from malignant spirits."

"Moira said that, huh?" Remus said, lifting his face up so that he was almost nose-to-nose with Severus, a wicked grin slowly spreading on his face. "Was that the girl you were chummy with during the Welcoming Feast?"

"Oooh, Severus has a girlfriend," Peter said in a singsong voice, winking at Remus.

"Er-- uh--," Severus stuttered, waving his hands in the air while shaking his head vigorously.

"It must have been love at first sight," Remus said, crossing his arms over his chest and nodding slowly.

"It's not like that--"

"Severus has a girlfriend..."

"And there you're already exchanging gifts. What did you give her, Don Juan?"

"No, no, she also gave pendants to the other--"

"Severus has a girlfriend..."

"OH, SHUT UP," Severus said, taking a playful swipe at Peter's head.

Rolling to his side to evade Severus, Peter crashed into a quivering flutterby bush. Some of its pale green leaves had gotten dislodged, floating over their heads in graceful arcs.

Remus snatched one from the air before it could fall to the ground. "They look like pretty little butterflies, don't they?" he said. He studied the leaf closely, running a finger along the edges of its curved lobes. Severus fervently hoped it would make him forget about his teasing.

"Hmm." Remus bounced the delicate leaf gently on the palm of his hand. He pulled out his wand, pointed it at the leaf and whispered, "Wingardium Leviosa!" The leaf floated up and up, its two lobes fluttering in the air like real butterfly wings, in time with Remus's wand flicks. Severus found himself holding his breath; he thought it was the most magical thing he had ever seen.

Picking up another leaf from the ground, Severus used the same spell to levitate it towards Remus's leaf. Time seemed to stop as the leaves circled each other in the air, until a gust of wind blew them over the lake, and out of their sight.

Peter was on his feet, jumping around and clapping enthusiastically. "That was groovy, guys! Do it again! Do it again!"

Remus smiled at Severus. "Nah," he said, plopping himself back down on the grass.

Peter glanced at Severus, a pleading look on his eyes. Severus shrugged and started playing with Cat's nose.

Looking deflated, Peter lightly kicked at the flutterby leaves left on the ground. "No fair," he said, pouting.

"Want to see more, Peter?" Severus heard someone behind him say. Before he could turn around, the same voice shouted, "WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!"

A heavy, hard object hit Severus on the side of his head, making his eyes water at the sudden explosion of pain. He had a fuzzy awareness of panic-stricken voices, Cat's venomous hissing, and something cool being pressed to his head; before a million fluttering butterflies crowded around his head, blocking his vision, turning his world to black.