Talk is Cheap

A Little Conversation

"Harry?"

"Yes, Headmaster?"

"I cannot stress how important it is for you not to leave your house this summer. As rarely as you can."

"My family, sir. They- "

"I know they don't feel favorable to your magical background. Try to find a middle ground and work through this as best you can."

Small sigh. "Of course, Headmaster."

~~~~~~~

Slam.

"One of these days, Potter. One of these days."

"I look forward to it."

"Just let it go, Harry. We're almost at the station."

"...fine."

~~~~~~~

"Well, that was a smashing ending to Sixth Year."

"Git."

"He lives to piss me off."

"That's the only thing I can think of that explains his presence on this earth."

"I was thinking more like Narcissa and Lucius Malfoy having sex."

Silence.

Shrill scream. "Oh. My. God."

"The images...!"

"Hermione, that was the cruelest thing you've ever done to me. Ever. I won't be able to sleep for weeks."

"You don't think they look cute together?"

"They do make a stunning couple..."

"Ginny, you are not helping."

"Shut. Up. Now."

Sigh. "Does no one see the romance...?"

"Hermione! Stop."

"Fine."

"Yes, a truly smashing end to Sixth Year indeed."

~~~~~~~

"I'll see you later, Ron."

"Don't worry. We're going to twist Dumbledore's arm until he lets you come stay with us. At least for a few weeks. We won't abandon you to the Muggles."

Smile. "Thanks."

"George was looking forward to seeing you."

"Ron..."

"No pressure. I'm just saying, he likes you a lot."

"It's just... strange. Maybe something I can get over, but he still seems, like... like a brother."

"I think you just labeled him that way. Think about it, okay?"

"I will. I mean, he is cool and we've got a lot in common-"

"Please don't say he looks hot, or something equally disturbing."

Beat.

"He's gorgeous. And if I could get Fred in on the action..."

"Harry!"

"Sorry. Can't help myself." Smirk.

"That was awful."

"Almost as bad as Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy?"

"I really, really hate you."

Laugh. "I'll see you soon, okay, Ron?"

"Yeah. See you soon."

~~~~~~~

"Boy! Get in the car!"

"Yes, Uncle Vernon."

"I trust there won't be any funny stuff this summer?"

"No. Of course not."

~~~~~~~

"I mean, I'm Harry Potter, not God. What do they expect from me?"

Silence.

"I don't have all the answers! I'm not the answer! I am not some fricken messiah sent from above to save all human and magical-kind!"

Silence.

"I am not all-powerful, I am not a hero, and I am not... I...

Silence.

"I suppose I am quite insane trying to talk to an owl."

Hooting noise. Sigh.

~~~~~~~

"Thank God you're here!"

"That bad?"

"Well, more or less the same as usual."

"Bad enough, then. Come on, get in the car."

"Hello, Mr. Weasley."

"Good to see you again, Harry. Is that all your things?"

"Yes. Literally."

Awkward silence.

"Well, we're going to Diagon Alley later this week. You can buy whatever you need then."

"Aren't you going to say goodbye to your family?"

"They aren't home."

Silence.

"Yeah. So what's been happening at the Burrow?"

"Charlie stopped by last week, still raving about how you handled that Horntail. He's sorry he missed you. Ginny and Mum are in a fever pitch, and Fred has been practically sitting on George to keep him still."

"I... well..."

"It's your own fault you know. You're the one who wrote him over the summer."

"He wrote me first! What was I supposed to do, ignore him?"

"Aww, you're blushing. You like him, don't you?"

"Ron..."

"Harry and George sitting in a tree..."

"What are you, a First Year?"

"...K-I-S-S-I-N-G..."

"Idiot."

~~~~~~~

"Oy! Harry!"

"Hey, George."

"I..."

"For the love of God, snog all ready!"

Blush.

"Shut up, Ron!"

"Ronald Weasley!"

Sigh. "Sorry, Mum."

"You are so dead."

~~~~~~~

"So?"

"You honestly think I'm going to tell you?"

"I am your best friend..."

"So is Hermione."

"But she's a girl! She doesn't understand!"

"I would be going out with a guy. That makes her more qualified than you."

Beat.

"Going out?"

"Damn it."

"That's a good thing!"

"Well the thing is, Ron, we're not really... going out."

"So what is it then?"

"It's nothing. I just can't see George that way. Sorry."

"Don't be... well, don't say sorry. At least not to me. It's not your fault... Well, actually it is your fault. But don't worry, he'll get over it. Eventually."

"You are so much help, Ron."

Weak laugh. "Sorry."

~~~~~~~

"George, stop that."

"Sorry, Mum."

"You don't look sorry."

"Well, that's because I'm not."

"Calm yourself dear. You're making Harry blush."

~~~~~~~

"One of the definite perks of George liking me... no more practical jokes."

"Don't rub it in. User. Just because you're the only person in the house who didn't get hit with the slime in the showers. Can't believe he's still holding out for you."

"Oh, he'll get it eventually I suppose."

"And until then, you're going to be prank-free."

Laugh. "Ron?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for saving me from the Dursleys."

"No problem. I couldn't just leave you there. Those people are awful."

"I second that. So when's Hermione coming up?"

"She's not."

"She's... not?"

"Nope. We called it quits. For good."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. We were both getting tired of swinging between not talking because we were too mad at each other to think straight and not talking because we were snogging each other's brains out."

"Well, at least you're still friends."

" 'Course we are."

~~~~~~~

"I can't believe you've been here a month all ready."

"Yeah. School's in a week."

Groan. "Did you have to remind me?"

"Oh, I don't know. I'm kind of looking forward to it."

"Now you sound like Hermione. The woman is nagging me by proxy."

"Proxy? You know what that means? She'd be proud."

"Shut up."

"Aww, is ickle Ronniekins afraid he's turning into Head Boy material?"

"Shut. Up."

~~~~~~~

"Bye, George."

"I'll be seeing you, Harry."

Smacking noise.

"Oy, take care of him for me, all right, Ron?"

Eye roll. "Of course. Wouldn't dream of letting anyone harm a hair on his head."

"They'd better not. Or we'll test all the newest Weasley products on them."

"There's a thought. I hope it's Malfoy then."

~~~~~~~

"George kissed me. George. Kissed me. George kissed. Me."

"No matter how many times you say it, it's still true."

"George. Kissed. Me."

"Get over it all ready."

"George..."

"Gah! Stop it! It wasn't even a real kiss!"

"Of course it was a real kiss! Lip on lip contact counts as kissing in my book!" Pause. "Oh my God. George kissed me!"

"I'm begging you..."

"George... kissed me!"

Whimper. "... please stop..."

~~~~~~~

"Kill me. Kill me now."

"Ron, you are a complete drama queen. King. Whatever."

"I might as well die. Everyone's paired off except me. I mean, there's you and George..."

"Hey!"

"Well, sort of. But there's Ginny and Colin. Hermione and Dean. When exactly did that happen anyway? Seamus and... well, whoever he's going out with this week."

"This week happens to be that brunette Ravenclaw. A fifth-year, I think. But cheer up Ron. There are plenty of people for you to go out with. Lavender and Parvati, or how about that fifth year, Ashley? She's cute. And that's just our House!"

Groan. "Harry, please stop. You're making it worse. Ashley's going out with Neville. And Lavender is going out with Parvati."

"Oh. How do I miss these things?"

"You live in your own world."

Frown. "Apparently more than I thought."

"It's all right. Last year was... distracting."

"Having Death Eater assassins trying to kill me every week or so was kind of distracting, yes."

"Ah well. Let's not live in the past."

Laugh. "C'mon, I'm tired. Let's get up to the dorm."

~~~~~~~

"Hey Harry?"

"Yeah?"

"I just remembered something. Malfoy. What was up with him earlier?"

"I don't know. He was unusually quiet, wasn't he?"

"I think he's plotting something."

"Seamus, were they even talking to you?"

"Shut up, Dean! I'm just trying to be helpful!"

"Well, if he is, we'll get to the bottom of it."

"I don't think he actually is plotting something. Growing up around Fred and George, you learn to see a plot a mile away."

"Maybe. Think he's just not going to be so obnoxious?"

"Like that'll ever happen!"

"Shut up, Seamus!"

"Dean, I swear to God man..."

"Good night everyone!"

Silence.

"Good night, Neville."

"Sorry."

"S'all right. Just shut up."

~~~~~~~

"One thing I should have learned by now: Never get between Neville and sleep."

"Yeah. Normally he's so quiet, but when he's tired..."

"Rowr."

"Yeah."

"So what do we have today?"

"Potions. Bright and early the first day."

"Of course. With...?"

"The Slytherins."

"Of course."

"Try not to hex anyone this year, Ron. Snape takes off points for you existing, much less actually misbehaving."

"Can't help it. If Malfoy so much as looks at me sideways..."

"Deep breaths, Ron."

"I... You... " Growl. "I can't stand it."

~~~~~~~

"Today we will be making the Munatius Potion, which you all should have done essays on over the summer." Eagle-eyed stare. "The ingredients are on the desks, and you have exactly one hour to complete it. Beginning now."

"And so it begins..."

"Why do you keep saying that?"

"Saw it in a movie. It got stuck in my head."

"You're such a freak."

"Sure, insult your best friend. Good plan."

"S'not like there's anyone else around."

"We should actually be working on our Potion, so you're stuck with me for now."

"Right. In that case, does the asphodel go in before or after the holly?"

"Before." Pause. "Like now, Ron."

"Oh! Sorry."

Silence.

"Here's the holly."

"Thanks."

"Wait!"

"Huh?"

"What?"

"Don't put that in yet. You forgot the gillyweed. It'll explode if you put that in."

"Ah... thanks."

"Don't worry about it."

~~~~~~~

"That was the most bizarre experience of my life."

"Mine too."

"What?"

"It was surreal."

"What? What happened?"

"Completely unbelievable."

"Just... unreal."

"What ruddy happened?"

"Malfoy helped us."

Beat.

"Pardon?"

"Malfoy helped us. He stopped us from blowing up our cauldron."

"Hermione? Are you all right?"

"I've suddenly gone deaf. I thought I heard you say that Malfoy..."

"... helped us. Yeah. Twilight Zone."

"Do do do do do do do doooo..."

"Exactly."

"Umm, what's the Twilight Zone?"

~~~~~~~

"Chop this up, all right? I've got to get more powdered bicorn..."

"All right." Pause. "This good?"

"Yeah."

Long silence.

"Malfoy?"

"Yes?"

"Any particular reason you aren't trying to kill me this year?"

"Because I need you to kill Voldemort just as much as everyone else around here. Maybe more."

Very long silence.

"I don't understand."

"Don't worry, I'll speak slowly and use smaller words." Deep breath. "I don't want to be a Death Eater. I don't want Voldemort to win this war. I need you to win it." Pause. "And squabbling all the time was getting annoying."

"I... right."

"Could you get the toad warts?"

"Do I look like a house elf?" Pause. "Oh, fine. But you're chopping them up."

~~~~~~~

"He said what?"

"Shh!"

"Jesus Ron, be a little louder, why don't you?"

"Err, sorry. But he said what exactly?"

"He doesn't want to be a Death Eater. And he doesn't like Voldemort, basically."

"Is anyone else finding that hard to believe?"

"I don't know. Seemed like he was telling the truth."

"Well Hermione, what do you think?" Pause. "Hermione?"

"I'm not sure."

"What do you mean you're 'not sure'? What's to be 'not sure' about?!"

"Well, one, he's been acting different. And two, the Slytherins have been treating him different. Did you notice? I don't know what you'd call it, exactly. Crabbe and Goyle haven't changed, but Pansy was straight up rude to him."

"And that's strange, because she was all but announcing their engagement last year..."

"Blaise was off as well. And she was acting really strange, because she was almost... pitying. Pity. From a Slytherin. I don't know. It was weird. And everyone else seems to avoid him slightly. Not like getting up and leaving the moment he sits down. Not that kind of avoiding. But staying as far away as possible. Like he's got some sort of disease."

"You've been watching him an awful lot."

Shrug. "I always watch the Slytherins. Someone around here has to know what's going on."

"So, you think he's telling him the truth? And that's why the Slytherins are doing that?"

"I'm not sure. If they were all avoiding him, that would make sense. But there are all these different reactions. I'm not sure. I'm reserving judgement."

"So, basically you're telling me I'm the only one with any sense around here?"

"He could be telling the truth, Ron."

"Here's the big question: Why? Why the sudden switch in loyalties? Every year up until now he was You-Know-Who's biggest fan. Now, suddenly, he's on Harry's side."

"He might not have known what he was getting into. Not really. They think it's all evil fun-and-games. It's not. Being a Death Eater is pretty degrading, actually. Bowing, scraping, fighting for Voldemort's - "

"Stop saying his name!"

"Voldemort's attention. Maybe he finally got a taste of reality."

"Good. About ruddy time."

"I don't know about that."

"I wouldn't wish Voldemort-"

"You said his name again!"

"- on anyone. Well. Maybe a select few."

"Wormtail."

"Lucius."

"Umbridge."

"Is she still at St. Mungo's?"

"So they say."

"Would I be a horrible person if I said, 'good'?"

Pause.

"No."

"All right then. Good."

~~~~~~~

"Mr. Malfoy?"

"Yes, Professor?"

"Are you... all right?"

"Would you be?"

Sigh. "I'd hoped..."

Silence.

"You should understand that Hogwarts is open on all holidays. You're welcome to stay here through as many of them as you wish."

"Thank you, Professor, but I can't imagine that would go over very well."

"No, it wouldn't, would it?" Pause. "Was there any scars from your... incident?"

Bitter laugh. "There's a few. One rather large one."

"As I feared. Draco, you know I am always here..."

"I know. Thank you again, but I'm afraid it's too late."

Long silence.

"And what is it you wish, Draco? Where do your loyalties lie?"

"Not with him, certainly. I don't know if he knows that yet."

"Whatever you do, do not be careless around him. Hide your feelings, your allegiances. Hide everything and tell him nothing."

"No need to tell me that. That is exactly what I plan to do. I may be his, but I am not on his side."

"Draco, I... you know I can't help you. Not like that. But if you ever wish to change where you stand, or at least the direction in which you are facing, come to me."

"I... I will. I'll think about it." Pause. "After all, it can't really get much worse, can it?"

"I'm afraid not."

Silence.

"Good night, Mr. Malfoy."

"Good night, Professor."

~~~~~~~

"Hermione, please tell me that isn't a practice N.E.W.T."

"Umm... it isn't a practice N.E.W.T.?"

"For the love of God! It's October! OCTOBER! Six months until N.E.W.T.S. Six months! Hermione, you need a hobby. Really, you do."

"Shut up, Ron. Just because I want to be prepared."

"Quite honestly 'Mione, planning something six months ahead of time really is quite frightening."

"Thank you so much for backing me up on this one, Harry."

"Hey, it has always been dismally apparent where I stand on the subject of studying. I have no stand."

"And yet you are still in the top ten percent of the class. Sometimes I want to shoot you."

"Shoot me? How dreadfully Muggle of you. You must have meant hex."

"And you're in the top one percent. So why bother killing off us lesser beings?"

Sigh. "You're all driving me insane."

"I am really feeling the love this morning."

Soft singing. "Looking for love in all the wrong places, looking for love..."

"Now that's going to be stuck in my head all day. Thank you ever so much."

Beaming smile. "Welcome." More singing. "Looking for love in all the wrong places, looking for love..."

"Gah! Stop it!"

"What? Don't you want to sit and bask in my amazing vocal abilities?"

"No."

"Ow. That hurts. Really it does. Right here."

"There's something there?"

"So now you've confused me with Snape. I knew you were an idiot."

"Ow. That hurt. Really it did. Right here."

"Shut up."

Singing. "Looking for love in all the wrong places, looking for love..."

"Hermione!"

"What? You got it stuck in my head! You have no one to blame but yourself!"

Sigh. "It's just going to be that kind of day, isn't it?"

~~~~~~~

"... partnered project. I'll leave it to you to find a partner and decide upon a subject from the list. This is quite a weighty assignment. Make sure to do your best."

Shuffle of chairs.

"Oy! Hermione!"

"Ron..."

"Please? I promise to work on it. Really hard." Pout. "Really."

Sigh. "All right. But you'd better."

Awkward silence.

"Well."

"Yeah."

"Seems as though we're the only ones without partners."

"Did you want to work together? If you didn't, I'm sure Professor Flitwick would let us work alone if - "

"No. It's fine."

"A-all right. Should I meet you in the library later, then?"

"Is eight all right?"

"Fine."

"Okay." Pause. "See you then, I guess."

"See you then."

~~~~~~~

"Sorry about that. I didn't mean to abandon you, it's just..."

"No, it's all right, Ron. It won't be that bad. In fact, I'm sure it will be fine."

"Did you hit your head or something? We are talking about Draco Malfoy here, aren't we?"

"Yes. And admit it, he's been acting nice. Well, maybe that's not quite the word. But he has been acting polite."

"You did hit your head, didn't you?"

"Ron, you ass!"

"Well, sorry, but excuse me for being a bit hesitant about trusting him."

Cooing noise. "Poor baby. Is ickle Ronniekins holding a grudge?"

Growl. "Shut it, you."

"I'm just saying. He hasn't been an ass lately."

"Exactly. Be serious, Ron. Has he made one crack about you at all?"

"No."

"About anyone?"

"Not really."

"Then why are you so put off?"

"One month of good behavior excuses six years of making my life miserable? Don't think so."

Sigh. "Whatever, Ron. It's just a project after all."

~~~~~~~

"So what are we doing?"

"Hmm?"

"For the project. Any ideas?"

"The Vampire Convention of 988 would be a good one. The Great Hippogriff Migration of 1466 was on the list too, though it would not be my preference..."

"Afraid of hippograffs?" Small smile.

"No more than anything else. Their claws are a bit off-putting."

"Personal experience is great, isn't it?"

"Laugh all you want. My arm really was hurt that whole time."

"Really."

"You've certainly gotten the hang of that sarcasm thing. And yes, really. I don't heal all that quickly. I've a sort of... a magical immunity to healing potions. They don't work on me the way they do on normal wizards."

"Why?"

"No one knows. About one in every thousand or so wizards are the same way though, so I'm not a complete freak."

"I didn't say you were. I'd just never heard of it before."

"Well. Now you know."

Cough. "So, about the project?"

"We could also study the life's work of Gregory Madoc. Or the Wandless Magic Revolution. I'd go with..."

"Gregory Madoc."

"Yes, that's what I was thinking."

"Seems like the best idea."

"Right. Let's get started. I'll check in the Restricted Section."

"Madame Pince lets you in there?"

"I've got a permanent pass."

"Lucky. For you anyway."

"Mhmm. And you. For today anyway."

"Right."

~~~~~~~

"He still has all his limbs at least."

Sigh. "Yes, Ron, I'm fine. Thanks for asking."

"Why ask? I can see for myself."

"It's called common courtesy. Same thing that says you shouldn't talk about people who are standing in front of you."

"Bah. You spoil all my fun."

Sigh.