Not Just an Empty Emotion

Chapter 24-Turning Points

"So, what's going on?"

"Give me a chance, Kierre. I've tried speaking to him. I think he's a bit suspicious, but don't worry; I'll work on him."

"What have you said to him?"

"I've told him I've seen the light, basically."

"Seen what light?" Kierre snapped.

"Exactly. I've been a bit cryptic. I've just told him that I've noticed how he's been acting, and said that I feel distanced from my 'old life'. He didn't like it at first, but give me time."

"Good. But I need to know how much time?"

"As much as I need! I can't tell you how long it'll take, just that I will do it eventually! Right?"

"Fine. But don't get like that with me, Foster. You'll regret it."

"Whatever," Foster snarled back.

"I think it's time I paid our dear friend Draco another little visit..." Kierre muttered menacingly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Draco had left Yesterday's room feeling a lot happier than when he went in. The damage he had caused was not totally repaired but it was getting there. He had wanted to stay and talk it through some more, but Potter had insisted that they return to their common rooms, saying that in time it would work itself out. Draco smiled; he knew Potter was right. As usual.

"Out again, Malfoy?" said a voice. "Where to this time?"

Draco's heart sank as he looked up and found himself staring into the face of Kierre.

"What do you want now?"

"That's a bit rude, Malfoy. Maybe I should teach you some manners. Like how to answer questions when you're asked. Where have you been?"

"I've been out! Look what does it matter to you? I don't understand why you're so interested in me all of a sudden!"

"Because I know how Malfoys act. I know that only something seriously big could make a Malfoy behave the way you are. Got me? I want to know what it is...what's changed so much in your life, eh?"

"Nothing," snarled Draco. "I'm still Draco Malfoy and don't you dare suggest otherwise. I'm not up to anything."

"Yeah? Well I'm sorry but I'm not buying that crap! I'm not letting this rest, Malfoy. If there's something going on I want to know."

"Fuck off!" Draco yelled angrily. "I've had enough of this! Why the hell should I tell anyone what I'm doing? Don't mess with me Kierre, or you will be the one to regret it!"

He had gone too far. Kierre didn't even bother reaching for his wand; he just punched Draco as hard as he could. Draco tried not to yell out in pain but he couldn't help it; Kierre had a powerful fist. Draco writhed to try and avoid the blows, but to no avail. Finally he managed to get to his wand. He directed it at Kierre and moaned, "Expelliarmus!"

Kierre was thrown away from Draco into the opposite wall with a grunt of pain. He glared at Draco and looked as though he might quite like to resume the fight, but thought the better of it. He stood up and said dangerously, "See you soon, Malfoy."

Draco leant against the wall for support, clutching his stomach and trying to wipe the blood from his face. He knew he would have to move; he couldn't explain his injuries if he was found by anyone. He dragged himself to his feet, trying to ignore the pain, and made his slow way back to the Common Room.

The room was half empty, yet, once again, Foster was in there.

"Jesus, Malfoy!" he said when Draco came through the wall. "What the hell's happened to you?"

"What do you think has happened?" Draco replied darkly.

"Who was it?"

"It doesn't matter. It's nothing..."

"Doesn't look like nothing."

"Well it is alright?"

"Fine...fine. You should go to the Hospital Wing you know."

"I'm not going to Madam Pomfrey, I don't need to. I'll be fine."

Foster looked at him doubtfully. "Malfoy...is this...has this got anything to do with...what we were talking about the other day?"

"What?" Draco snapped. "What are you on about?"

"Well...maybe I was wrong...maybe I'm not the only one who's noticed you've changed. I'm right aren't I. Someone's-"

"I haven't changed!" Draco said heatedly. A few people glanced in their direction, and he lowered his voice. "I haven't changed and it's nothing to do with anything like that, alright?"

"Whatever you say, Malfoy," Foster replied in a calm voice that was full of disbelief. "But something's up with you."

Draco said nothing, just dabbed at his black eye with the back of his sleeve.

"You can talk to me, you know. When you're ready," Foster said. He got no reply again so he picked up his bag and walked out of the common room with a frustrated sigh. Draco thought for a minute, a slight frown on his normally blank face. He wished he could talk to Foster...he really needed to talk about Kierre and his problems about that with somebody. He'd already decided he couldn't talk to Potter about that so who else was there? Ginny Weasley? Hermione Granger? Crabbe? Goyle? He didn't think so somehow...

Yet here it was, the chance to talk, being offered to him on a plate, and here he was, refusing. Was he doing the right thing in refusing Foster's offer of friendship? Or would it be too much of a risk to confide in someone who had, as ye, provided no evidence that he really had changed?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hermione held up the Daily Prophet with a shaking hand, attempted to ignore the grotesque picture of hundreds of bodies beneath the menacingly glittering black-and-white Dark Mark, and began to read what it said, attempting to control her trembling voice.

"FIRST RALLY OF YOU-KNOW-WHO AND HIS SUPPORTERS

Last night, just weeks after You-Know-Who's first raid on a Muggle village, the Dark Lord, miraculously restored to his body after a fifteen-year absence, held his first "Death Rally". He was flanked by his supporters, known as "Death Eaters", as they paraded around the streets of London.

"Since the Minister for Magic, Cornelius Fudge, announced last June that You-Know-Who was back, the magical community has lived in terror of when and where he will strike. The first real confirmation that he had, indeed, returned, came four weeks ago when You-Know-Who and a select band of Death Eaters raided a Muggle village, killing over 100 people. On that occasion Ministry Aurors were able to act swiftly, reducing loss of life. Yesterday, however, they met resistance from Death Eaters, and other supporters of You-Know-Who, so were unable to recover the situation for some time.

Muggles who stood in the path of the mass of hooded and cloaked Death Eaters were killed instantly; any Wizard attempting to oppose them was tortured.

"A Ministry spokeswizard said, 'Unfortunately on this occasion the Aurors had received no prior intelligence about the rally, so it took quite a while for them to break up the crowds around the Death Eaters, and then to disperse the followers. Before we could capture anyone they disapparated, leaving destruction behind them. It is believed that last night's rally was successful, and You-Know-Who has captured some of our community's most prominent wizards, using all sorts of illegal curses in the process. There seem to be more Death Eaters than ever before, and it seems as though while You-Know-Who has been relatively quiet since his return he has used that time to drum up support.'

"We do not have any detailed accounts of the events of last night, just that from 7 o'clock until past midnight You-Know-Who and followers chanted anti-Muggle slogans, killed and tortured hundreds of people-Muggle and Wizard alike- and burned property. The exact number of dead is, at present, unknown, but it believe that more than 180 Muggles were slaughtered, along with over 130 Wizards. According to the Ministry of Magic seven Ministry Officials also lost their lives.

"The Daily Prophet can exclusively reveal that the Ministry of Magic is considering allowing Aurors to use the three Unforgivable Curses to capture Death Eaters, as they did in You-Know-Who's first reign of terror. The magical community will no doubt wish to know more details of these plans to ensure their own safety, and the Daily Prophet has written to ministry officials requesting more information."

"Cornelius Fudge said at a press conference this morning, 'We would beg the community to remain calm, and consult the information sent out to you lat summer for reassurance.'

"It's really started, hasn't it?" said Ginny quietly.

"It's the same as it was last time. This is a proper war now. Doesn't sound like they can do much more about it now than they could the first time round," Seamus Finnegan sighed bitterly.

"Only because they haven't been working on ways to improve the defences they already had!" Harry said. "If they'd listen to people once in a while...if they hadn't been so stubborn in the first place then maybe they could have things to defeat the Death Eaters!"

"And You-Know-Who!" Dean Thomas chipped in hopefully. Harry didn't say anything; no amount of preparation on the Ministry's part could stop Voldemort.

The crowd that had gathered to listen to Hermione read the article dispersed, muttering darkly.

"It's going to get worse, isn't it?" Harry muttered glumly.

Hermione put a comforting hand on his arm and said, "It's inevitable. Everything has to get worse before it can get better, Harry."

"I know..." he muttered. He knew better than anyone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why did you hit him like that?"

"I would've though that much was obvious. I wanted answers. He wasn't giving them to me."

"But people are going to notice he's been in a fight! Couldn't you be more...secretive about it? Less obvious?"

"It's not happening fast enough!"

"That doesn't mean you can go around beating the guy up! Because he doesn't answer the question right now, you resort to Muggle duelling? It's ridiculous when there's so much more we could do...more effective things. Beating him up is worthless. That's not going to get answers, don't you know that by now?"

"Well you do something about it then!" Kierre retorted angrily.

Foster was silent for a moment, then, his eyes over bright and an odd expression on his face he said softly, "OK. I will. Don't worry...I will..."

Kierre frowned at him slightly before deciding that it didn't matter what Foster was going to do as long as it got him the answers he wanted. "Are you sure? Then go out and do whatever it is."

Foster stood up, a slightly twisted smile on his face, nodded to Kierre and then strode away. It was time to get what he had been wishing for for so very long...at last he would be able to do it...and there would be nothing Malfoy could do about it...nothing at all...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So everything's OK now?"

"Yes, how many times do I have to tell you? And why can't you ask Potter?"

"I already have," Ginny said, "I just wanted to hear it from you, too."

"Well you've heard it now so..."

"Malfoy, are you sure everything's perfectly OK?"

"Yes!"

Ginny raised an eyebrow.

"Fine...it's just going to take a few days to get really comfortable with each other again, but that's all!" he said hurriedly at the look on Ginny's face. "I promise. I love him." He avoided her eye, and his voice was shy, almost as though he were still ashamed to admit it.

Ginny couldn't help but smile as she heard the infamous Draco Malfoy saying those words so sincerely, about Harry Potter.

"What?" Draco asked suspiciously.

"Nothing," Ginny replied innocently. "I'm just pleased, that's all."

Draco shook his head. "Whatever..." he said puzzled, and turned to walk down the staircase towards Snape's office, raising his hand as a goodbye.

He knocked three times on the door, his stomach twisting slightly in nerves.

"Come" Snape's brisk voice said from inside the office.

Draco entered the office feeling he'd rather stick his head in a barrel of rat intestines than face what he was about to, but he walked in and closed the door behind him anyway.

"Ah, Mr Malfoy. At last we reach our lesson. Are you fit to take it?"

"Yes sir," Draco said tensely.

"Good...we shall begin with-"

"Professor?" Draco cut in suddenly, willing himself not to throw up. Snape's eyes flashed in anger.

"What?" he spat.

"I...er...well, someone said you didn't...and I..."

"Spit it out, Malfoy! I haven't got all day!"

Draco took a breath-

"Idontwannabeadeatheater."

"Pardon?"

"I don't...I don't want to be a Death Eater," he repeated quietly. He looked at Snape's face and waited for the blow. But Snape's face did not alter. He did not flinch, nor did he make any other sign that he had heard Draco's admission.

"What?" he said coldly, at last.

"I don't support Voldemort. I don't want to hurt Muggles. I'm on the Order's side."

"How do you know about the Order?" Snape asked swiftly, his eyes narrowing furiously.

"I...can't say," Draco said apologetically.

To his surprise Snape accepted this without question. "Since when, and why have you decided this?"

"Since last summer when my Father first started to try and involve me in Voldemort's activities. I realised what they were doing."

"I see," Snape muttered. "I cannot deny that I have noticed a change in you, Malfoy, but I could not have imagined the extent...can you give me details?"
Draco blushed. "No sir," he said, "I can't. I've made a promise..."

Snape nodded again. "And why have you chosen to tell me this? When your father had asked me to teach you since I am a Death Eater myself?"

"I've told you because I don't want to learn it, and you don't want to teach it," Draco said defiantly.

Snape stood up swiftly. "What do you know? What do you mean I 'don't want to teach it'?"

Draco thought he detected a slight note of fear in his teacher's voice, something he'd never heard before. "I know you're in the Order. I know you've changed.... just like I've changed."

Snape sat down again, breathing hard. "I'm not going to ask you how you know, Malfoy. But I am warning you to keep this strictly secret. Understand?"

"Yes sir. I don't want anyone to find out about me, either."

Snape nodded. "Well, I suppose that's it, then, Malfoy. You are dismissed."

"Sir!"

"Yes?"

"I was thinking...well.... if my father finds out I'm not being taught..."

"I see..." Snape repeated. "What do you suggest? Lie? Would you lie to you father, and ask me to do the same?"

"No. Not really. I don't want to be taught to be a Death Eater...but I do want to fight Voldemort. It wouldn't be lying, not really."

"So I would still be teaching you..." Snape whispered. "Your father need never know the content of the lessons..."

"Not yet," Draco said. "He will eventually, but not yet."

Snape looked up, and stared at Draco for a minute.

"Well?" he snapped suddenly. "What are you waiting for? Wand out, let's begin."

*

The lesson passed in a haze for Draco. Snape took him through the basic defensive spells and jinxes, taught him about the way Voldemort and his Death Eaters worked, and began to teach him the tactics of the enemy-so he could avoid them. Draco left the lesson an hour later, with the promise that Snape would teach him more advanced defensive spells, and also spells to attack, and give him more information, as he grew more confident and able.

In a huge contrast to the lessons he had received over the summer with his father Draco thoroughly enjoyed the lesson. Not only was it interesting, but he liked learning the spells and perfecting those he hadn't been so great at, and also he found that it was made so much better by the fact that this was a cause he believed in-and now he was truly doing something to help fight Voldemort.

As he walked back to the Slytherin Common room he felt alive and enthused, as he had not done in a very long time; he was finally doing something.

He went straight up to his dormitory and sat on his bed with the emerald curtains drawn. He thought for a very long time about what he had learned that night, what he still had to learn, and how he could become fully useful in the War, and help Potter, himself, and others besides...

He sat there for maybe two hours, motionless and silent, before he next moved. He got up, and left the common room, strode along the dark corridors noiselessly, until he came to the kitchens. He tickled the pear in the picture of the fruit bowl, pulled open the door which appeared and went into the kitchen. Immediately a sea of tiny House Elves surrounded him, squealing questions and asking for orders.

He asked if he could have a mug of hot chocolate and in seconds he was holding a huge mug full of frothy chocolate. He turned to leave but as he did so a House Elf standing slightly apart from the rest, wearing a strange array of brightly coloured clothes and looking very nervous caught his eye. Dobby always avoided Draco when he went into the kitchens; the memories of dozens of punishments were still painful. In the past Draco had been quick to scowl at the elf, or else to ignore it, but now he felt different....it had feelings...deserved to be treated with respect...not only that but it had greatly aided Potter in their second year...

He looked the elf up and down, then looked it in the eye, and nodded once before leaving briskly. His last sight of the kitchens before the door closed again was of Dobby dissolving into hysterical sobs or mingled terror and joy.

He returned to the Common Room feeling relaxed a quite tired. He wanted to go to bed, drink his hot chocolate, and sleep. But as soon as he walked in he knew he couldn't do that.

Again there was just one person left in the common room.

And again that one person was Dominic Foster.