I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

Harry,

You're such a prat you know that? After that last journal entry you've got everyone thinking we're getting married! Not that I object or anything, but do you think you might get around to asking me before just deciding to announce it? Yes, I know you were teasing as well as venting some frustration towards what Ron and the others did to you, but still, when do you plan on letting them off the hook? I mean, mum and dad haven't said anything, I think Mum's too distracted making wedding plans to care and Dad, well he's merrily at work out in the shed. But I think the Order of the Red-Headed Prats is starting to get seriously worried you're going to turn me into a scarlet woman or something.

Ok, I admit, I don't really mind if they think I'm a scarlet woman, and I don't care if you make me one either. I kind of like the idea that I'm the only one that seems to get through that thick skull of yours to let you know that we care about you. I also like the fact that I have to snog you senseless to do it. Thanks for letting me!

You know things aren't easy for any of us anymore Harry, and they're only going to get more difficult and dangerous. I don't want to face them alone, I've done that already, it wasn't fun. If you want me to chase you so we can have a private 'discussion' or practice our 'conversational skills', please feel free to act on it. But please don't run away because you're scared Harry, that isn't like you at all and you know it.

It's a horrible truth having such a big family and dreading the fact that we probably won't all live through this regardless of what happens. I'm actually kind of grateful Percy has distanced himself from us. Maybe he'll be safe hiding under Fudge's coattails. I doubt it too, but you never know. I'm more afraid for Bill and the twins. Bill's always been a tad reckless when it comes to work, throwing himself into breaking all those curses, it's only a matter of time before one blows up in his face. And the twins, well, you know them, they're smart enough and all, but I don't know if they'll ever grow up enough to not laugh at the danger we're facing. Come on now, who else would come up with a practical joke that gives you a bloody nose?

I'm not too worried about Charlie, he should be safe enough for now in Romania with the dragons. I'm not too worried about Ron either, he's usually at Hogwarts like us. It's not like any of us can ever get into any trouble there now is it?

Mum knows how to take care of herself and you know what her temper can be like, she'd probably scold the death eaters into submission for scuffing up the floor. Dad, well, after what happened last Christmas, I think he might be the first one to fall and that terrifies me Harry. If you hadn't seen him in that vision, he'd have died and I don't know what would have happened then. Actually, I do know what would have happened, you wouldn't have been the only orphan at Hogwarts cause mum would have died of a broken heart not long afterwards.

You scare me sometimes Harry, because Hermione was right, you do have a hero complex, you do feel the need to rush off to save everyone from whatever danger they're facing, or from whatever danger you think they're facing. Quit being such a selfish bastard! If you died because you think it'll solve all of life's little problems, do you have any idea what it will do to the rest of us? Do you know what it will do to me?

I love you Harry James Potter, and running away from me won't change that fact in the slightest. All it will do is piss me off. And trust me, the next time you run, I won't snog you senseless to bring you around. You think Fred and George were kidding about my bat-bogey hexes? Think again. You run away from me and I'll hex you so badly, you'll think you got run over by the Hogwarts Express. Get the picture?

Now, onto more pleasant thoughts, I love you! I love you! I love you! And don't you forget it. I still want to know what I did with my hands that made you so excited that you called me a vixen. Not that I object mind you, because there isn't much about you I can object to.

Do you think we could get in some quidditch practice tomorrow before Hermione arrives? Ron should be properly distracted by her impending appearance, it should be fairly easy to get the quaffle past him. We really need to figure out a way to get those two together, it'd be nice to go a day or two without them bickering at each other.

Anyway, I love you Harry, I hope you have pleasant dreams.

Ginny

Ginny

Of course I'll have pleasant dreams. If I don't, I have you to beat some sense into my rather thick skull.

And yes, of course I know I'm a prat. But in my own defense, my mind tends to go to mush when you're kissing me, I suspect it has something to do with a lack of oxygen. And don't worry about the 'wedding', I've already explained, at rather great pains by the way, to Ron, that it was simply a way to get back at them for scaring me like that. I still can't believe they did that to me. I don't what's worth, that they pulled that on me, or that I was dense enough to believe it.

It's going to be a long time before any of them are completely back in my good graces. I know it's petty and vindictive to hold grudges, but after what they did, I'm finding it very difficult to forgive them.

I do plan to marry you someday Ginny, but I also plan on asking you properly when I think we're both ready, and we both know we aren't there yet. But maybe someday? Maybe? Please? How long are you going to make me grovel Ginny? I'm dying here! Why won't you answer me? Oh yeah, I'm writing in the journal. It gets a little confusing when I can smell the fragrance of your hair, or still feel your hands tracing patterns up and down my back. That's what you've done to me Ginny, and I don't know if I'll ever have the grace or eloquence to fully tell you what I'm feeling for you at this moment except to say that, despite all the logic of the situation, I love you. I've gone and fallen completely in love with you and I can't explain it, but I know I don't want to be apart from you if I can help it.

Even now I know you're down in your bedroom, sleeping comfortably, and it's killing me knowing I can't just walk down the stairs, enter your room, climb into bed with you and hold you close. Believe me, it's not for lack of wanting, but I think that would be the one sure way to go from your parents good graces to your parents very bad graces.

As for your family and Voldemort, now you know what I'm so frightened of. Not just what's already happened to you in your first year, yes I remember what happened, but what might happen in the future. I'm not just frightened of what might happen to YOU, but what might happen to the rest of your family and what effect that would have on you.

I know what it's like to loose family Ginny, and I know what it's like to be alone. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, you least of all. It hurts to know the people you care about are at risk and that there's nothing you can do to help them. That's why I had to get to the Ministry last June, not because I have a hero complex, but because my family was at risk. That's something Hermione doesn't understand, and part of me hopes she never does. I hope she never has to worry her family is truly at risk. It's an evil, vicious, rotten feeling deep in the pit of your stomach and you think it's going to eat you up. It's horribly worse then a Dementor, far, far worse.

I still have nightmares you know, from the third task. I still see Cedric lying there and there's nothing I can do to help him, because he's gone. That's why I wanted to help Sirius, because I couldn't bear the thought of seeing his lifeless eyes staring up at me, asking where I was and why I didn't come to help him.

God, you don't know how badly I want to run to you right now and just hug you and not let you go. It's so frightening Ginny. First he stole my parents from me, then my childhood, now I can't even have one normal year. I don't even know what normal is Ginny. If I'm not keeping Voldemort from getting some odd trinket, or filling his hands with some prophesy, I'm in hiding because someone's trying to kill me, or is trying to kill someone close to me.

I swear, if I actually manage live long enough to have children, I'm going to spoil them rotten. I'm going to give them every single little thing I never received. They're going to have a home they'll always feel welcome in, plenty of friends, an enormous bedroom, they won't ever want or need for anything, especially love, I'm going to love them so much, it'll smother them. And I fully expect you to hold me to this Ginny, you're the one person I trust with this and noone else. I don't think the others fully grasp what it's like, and I pray they never do.

By the way, did you hear about the prophecy Trelawney made about me? Well apparently she 'saw' that I'm going to become Minister of Magic and wind up having twelve children. You feel up to the task? You don't have to answer right away, but I figure I'd give you some time to think about it and let it sit in. It'll give us plenty of time to come up with their names. We could always name them after ourselves, you know, walk down the street followed by six little Harry's and six little Ginny's. How's that sound? Nah, I think it's a little bit much myself. Maybe name ten of them after us, give the other two different names.

Anyway, yes, I agree, we need to do something about Ron and Hermione, if only for our own sanity. Fred and George won't be around to distract us, though you'll be mercifully distracted by your OWL's, I wonder when we'll be getting our results for those, I'm kind of curious to see how I did. Maybe we can lock the two of them up in the attic with the family ghoul, let him pester them into action. Short of that, maybe just hit them on the head and toss them in the river. We'll talk more about that tomorrow.

Speaking of tomorrow, my birthday is the day after tomorrow and no one has said a word about anything. Now I know things have been hectic, but your mother isn't the type to let a birthday go by without baking a cake and sending along some sweets, this leads me to believe that perhaps there's a, oh what's the phrase I'm looking for, oh yes, a surprise party being planned is there? Not that I'd object, I'd just like to know if I should be properly surprised.

And yes, I'll do some scrimmaging with you tomorrow, on the sole condition that it isn't all quidditch, if you know what I mean. My jaw is still a little sore from that workout you gave it when we got back here from Little Winging, I think I need to give it a workout.

I'm going to get some sleep now because my head is starting to droop a little bit, but I'm not afraid, I have the perfect reason to wake up in the morning and she's sleeping not thirty feet from where I'm sitting right now.

I love you Ginny,

Harry