An Experiment Gone Wrong

Nearly a month had now passed since Severus and Remus had returned from St. Mungo's. Severus had actually taken nearly 10 minutes before he'd returned from visiting the Malfoy's, and when Remus had questioned him later that night on the visit, all Severus seemed to do was scowl. Far as Severus was concerned, the kid was pure veela and pure Malfoy, which by any standards meant bad news.

Remus didn't push the issue either, nor did he reveal to Severus that James had done something to the baby Draco. Mainly because he himself didn't know what it was and he didn't want Severus to think James had pulled something awful on the kid. Remus was sure though that whatever James had done to Draco wasn't bad, so he pressed it to the back of his mind and forgot bout it until the time would come.

Severus and Remus ended up going into muggle London not more than a few days after that night to finally get that Italian dinner. Severus admitted the food was quite good, but convincing Remus to try some 'real' Italian food, he talked to Albus and presented Remus with a surprise one afternoon.

Severus took Remus down to the Floo network in Hogsmeade, told him only the name of a pub grate he'd never heard of, and to wait when he arrived. When they stepped outside of the small dimly lit wizard pub, Remus realized exactly where they were, and his heart was singing. It was the city of Venice.

With it's visions of love, it's bridges and waterways, gondoliers singing gently on the wind, it was a paradise. They spent the day walking through the piazzas, and they had dinner in a lovely little restaurant where Remus had to admit did have the best tasting lasagna he'd ever eaten. Remus also found out that Severus had no plans even to go back to Hogsmeade or the school that night, instead they spent a quite evening in a small muggle hotel in south Venice, and things couldn't be going more perfectly they thought.

However reality started to seep in. Just after getting back from Venice Severus got summoned to a Death Eaters meeting. He was afraid, but with the help of the Order he took up his courage and attended. When he returned it was a palefaced Remus and a pacing James and Sirius that met him in Albus's office. They had of course waited for him to return, Remus on pins and needles with worry.

Thankfully nothing major had come of the meeting to Severus's relief. Mainly it was nothing more or less than Albus and the others already knew....that Voldemort was announcing the birth of young Draco Malfoy to the fold, and that he would grow up as part of the next generation of Death Eaters A glint in James's eyes however at that information seemed to make Remus uneasy, and again he had to resist the urge to find out just what James had done. But knowing his friend like he did, if James didn't want to say anything, he wouldn't.

Other than that Severus and Remus occupied themselves with various other things. They began working again on the potion a week before the full moon, both confident that it would work this time. As the full moon got closer as well Severus couldn't believe how much the lunar phase did seem to affect werewolves...and now that included himself. He was having a devil of time adjusting actually the closer the moon got, not having near the experience yet in being able to control himself like Remus did.

Their lovemaking became not just passionate but almost like a duel of wills. Between their growing strength coming to the surface, their needs intensified to the point of pain. Severus found that not only did they have to brew the Wolfsbane as the moon got closer, but another cauldronfull of Curacion Potion, not to mention they had to use a heck of a lot of healing spells during that week before the moon.

Even the returning staff noticed the tensions in these two men, though they were thinking it was on different reasons. It got to the point where Severus and Remus didn't even dare look at each other over meals, for they both knew if they did they wouldn't be able to control their urges for each other. And neither of them had any desire to start having sex right there in the Great Hall. So either they ignored each other fully, or they didn't bother to show up at all to meals, usually the latter won out.

The night before the full moon as they lay together in what Severus had began to think of as 'their' bed, he told Remus he was going to go with him to the Shack after all. As a human though, not as a wolf. And this scared the hell out of Remus. He didn't like it at all, he was afraid for Severus, but Severus remind him that he always got his way, and nothing Remus could say would stop him.

Severus argued that there really was no more danger since he could no longer be turned into a full werewolf anyway now since the binding. And even Remus had to agree on that and finally accepted that he was not going to be afraid of Severus's being there. He knew it was going to be difficult actually for him to physically be there right at that crucial moment, but he knew if he was going to love Remus in entirety, this was one obstacle he had to overcome.

Now it was the night of the full moon, and moonrise was only a scant few minutes away. They both headed out to the shack, each of them deep within their own thoughts. When they got there Remus got himself undressed and started to pace. Despite promising Severus he wouldn't be nervous, Remus was anyway. And Severus knew it.

"Remus stop it. Nothing is going to go wrong you git. You've been taking the potion everyday this week, and I know it's going to work this time," Severus said scowling at his mate.

"I know...it's just that....promise me that if anything goes wrong you'll leave immediately Sev...I don't want to hurt you..." Remus said in a pleading voice.

"I will make no such promise. I will not leave you alone, whether it's as a man or a wolf. Now sit down you're going to transform any second and you're pacing is making me nutters," Severus said with a glare.

Remus muttered but did sit down on the floor next to Severus, and just in time it seemed. Within the next few seconds the familiar pain began to flood through him, and he let out a scream of pure agony. Not more than a minute later, the werewolf was the one howling as the last remnants of the pain began to ebb away.

Severus was now the one who was scared, no question there. Being round Remus when he was just coming out of a transformation was one thing, but this....this brought back a flood of bad memories. *Don't panic...just don't panic. Don't be afraid...it's only Remus...if you show him fear...well just don't show fear...that's right Severus...breath and calm down...you've nothing to fear from him anymore...he's your lifemate...you love him...keep only those thoughts right now...* Severus's mind said soothingly.

Thankfully for Severus it worked, and that wasn't the only thing working. The werewolf had growled slightly at first at seeing Severus invading it's territory, but the calming of Severus's fears made the werewolf only puzzled. At least it wasn't attacking, which was a good sign. The werewolf eyed Severus wearily, unsure of this stranger but then something extraordinary happened, and Severus couldn't have been happier.

The werewolf came over and sniffed at Severus, and a light of recognition came into it's yellowed eyes. Gently it licked Severus's fingers, and with a growl of actual contentment, it curled up next to Severus, putting it's head into his lap. Severus felt the strong emotions coming from the werewolf, and it put a soft smile on his face. He could hardly believe it when he knew it really was Remus now inside the beast, and not a cold blooded killer. If it had been, he wouldn't be feeling the love and affections he was now, for only Remus would have done that.

A movement from Remus caused Severus to jump, not from fear but from what the werewolf was doing. "Oh no! You stop that right now Remus Lupin! Don't even try that!" he said firmly, pushing the werewolf's muzzle away from the certain area that the werewolf was nuzzling.

The werewolf gave off a small whine that was more a pout than anything else, but he did turn his muzzle away and just rested his head on Severus's knees instead. Severus put his hand on Remus's back and began to stroke his fur, amazed at how soft it actually was. About halfway after midnight though the werewolf got a bit restless, and getting up looked longingly at the trap door, then back at Severus.

"Oh I see, you're bored is that it? You want to go out?" Severus said with a slight grin.

The werewolf nodded and pawed the trapdoor, a pleading look in it's eyes. "Oh alright, I suppose we could go out...only for a bit though mind you. When I say we have to come back, we come back got it?" Severus said firmly while pointing his finger towards the werewolf. "Now, stand back and wait until I'm ready."

The werewolf padded over to the other side of the room as asked and waited while Severus opened the trapdoor and transformed. Moments later the two wolves were happily careening round the Forbidden Forest without a care in the world. Remus yet again astounded Severus with his knowledge of the grounds they were travelling on, and Severus had a tiny pang of regret that they hadn't gone out sooner then they had.

Time seemed to fly and before Severus even realized it his internal alarms went off signalling the break of dawn. He was thrilled when Remus didn't need urging to go back, that was even more proof that the potion was working and Remus was for the most part, the one in control of the werewolf. They hadn't 'talked' much in their respected forms this time, only a few phrases like 'Let's go here!" and "Come On!" was all that they really needed to think at each other.

When they finally found themselves coming back through the trapdoor of the shack it was again just in time. As soon as Severus retransformed from his wolf form and closed the trapdoor Remus himself retransformed. Severus was at his side in seconds, checking him over to make sure he was alright They both had been pretty wild out there tonight and both men sported a few cuts and bruises, but over all nothing major. Even as Severus was checking Remus over he could see pretty much everything beginning to heal now that he was back in human form.

Checking himself over he saw the same healing process, so he didn't give it another thought. He redressed Remus with a spell and reopened the trapdoor. Gathering Remus in his arms, he went back out to the tunnel and out of the Whomping Willow. Unfortunately Poppy Pomfrey was already waiting for them both, and she didn't look too happy.

"About time, sunrise was 10 minutes ago. Now don't give me that look Severus Snape I am not going to ask you to bring him to Hospital Wing. I just wanted to make sure you both were alright that's all. I know you're taking good care of him afterwards, but I refuse not to be concerned. Considering you two haven't barely been seen this week I wasn't even sure you would be here," she said in firm voice.

Severus scowled but nodded at her, not wanting to cause a scene at the moment. "For reason I will not explain to you Madam there was due cause not to appear most of this week," Severus said huffily. "Now if you'll excuse me I'll take Remus back to our room now. Good day," he said and promptly walked away before she could answer.

Yet again Poppy looked after the retreating form of Severus shaking her head. She hadn't missed the words 'our room' from his mouth, and suddenly a lot began to click into place. Though this week they had seemed quite out of sorts with each other during meals, and the tension was enough to be noticeable between them, she began to realize it wasn't because of uncomfortableness with each other, but something far more.

As she started to walk back to the castle she stopped midstep and realization dawned on her. A slow smile spread across her face as she now remembered something she'd seen on Severus not that long ago. She knew Remus and Severus had grown close since he began his stay at the castle, she had no problem even with the fact they were probably even lovers at this point.

However, if she suspected correctly now, what was now going on between them was far beyond simple lovemaking. Far beyond even just simple love. With a new lilt in her step and a whistle on her lips she strode towards the castle, Albus Dumbledore's office as her destination. She thought it was time the two of them had just a little chat about the school's potion master, and the lost duckling that was Remus Lupin.

Back in their room Severus had already put Remus back into the bed, changing him into one of his own silk pyjamas, the red ones he knew Remus had grown attached to now. After making sure he had a vial of Curacion Potion nearby, he headed off to take a quick shower. When he got done he put on his black silk pyjama's and slipped into the bed next to Remus, drawing him tightly into his arms. With a soft kiss on his lifemate's cheek, he himself drifted off to sleep.

It was dinnertime before either of the two men began to stir. Severus was the first one to really wake up however, and reached over for the vial of potion. Uncorking it he drank a small sip himself, then made sure Remus took the rest of it. He put the vial back on the dresser and snuggled back into bed, pulling Remus back into his arms again with a contented sigh.

"You're alright love?" he asked Remus softly while brushing aside a lock of his hair from his eyes.

"Mm...I am now love....have I said how spot on that potion of yours is?" Remus said back just as softly and slightly yawned and stretched a little, brushing his body up against Severus's lightly.

"Mmm, yes I believe you have...." Severus said absentmindedly, breathing in deeply the scents that were mingling in the air. It was an earthy smell that came to him, from their nighttime excursion. It was sweet with the scent of green leaves and sweetened grass that mingled with his own scents from when he had showered earlier. And he loved it.

"Oh...you've already showered....I can smell the vanilla and patchuli oil...." he said almost with a pout.

"I did....but....I can always...take another one if you want..." Severus said with a small grin, the implications thick in the air. Now that his body was waking up his wolf scent wasn't the only thing working on the lunar phase.

"I think..." Remus said softly and leaned in brushing his lips on Severus's, "that would be...a wonderful...idea..." he said a bit breathlessly.

Severus gave a small growl, unable to control himself any longer. Remus's scent was too tantalizing to him, and the brush of his lips drove him over the edge. The shower was forgotten for the moment as their needs warranted filling. The only thing on their minds at the moment was the echoes of their growls and moans, and the heated words of passion that accompanied them.

Several hours later, after spending themselves for the moment, they finally did manage to get into the shower. It was Remus who first realized though just how late it actually was. Walking back into the room from the bathroom, he was still drying his hair off when he said, "You know we missed all three meals today Sev. You think we could do a kitchen raid?" he said hopefully.

Severus laughed and nodded. "We could, though wouldn't it just be easier to just send for some food by house-elf?"

Remus grinned. "Yeah, it would be...but...it's way more fun to get it for yourself. I used to love raiding the kitchen back in my school days. Oh come on Sev, it'll be fun. We can feel just like kids again!" he said with a chuckle.

Severus rolled his eyes and shook his head. "You can feel like a kid again, personally I wouldn't want to. I hated my childhood thank you, and have no wish to ever repeat it again."

Remus laughed. "Not that you've told me much bout your childhood Sev so far, but I can understand that from what you have told me. One day though I wish you would tell me everything....and not just your childhood," he said thoughtfully now.

Severus looked at his lifemate sharply for a moment, though not really in anger but in a small way...fear. He was actually afraid to tell Remus things, though suddenly he really wasn't sure why. "Everything? Do you....do you mean that Remus? You really want to know what it was like for me? Not just my childhood...but...everything before us?" he asked quite seriously.

Remus looked deep into Severus's black eyes and nodded. "Yes Sev, everything. We're lifemates now, we shouldn't have secrets from each other. Face it Sev, school term starts next week, and you know I can't be here when it does. I want to know you...everything bout you...so I have something to remember when I'm off in gods know where next. And I...I want you to know everything bout me too Sev. Not just what I've told you so far but everything else..."

Severus didn't really know what to respond to this request. He was so afraid to tell Remus the truth, what he had been, what he had done...and especially what he had been in Paris with Stephan. Not that long ago he had briefly thought bout Stephan, and the more he had the more he'd realized that if truth be told, he finally came to terms with the fact that he was nothing more than one of the boys of Stephan's designs and under Stephan's rules.

Stephan had always picked out everything, from his clothes to his lovers, giving him expensive presents, showing him off as his 'boy', and in reality, that was nothing more then being a paid male whore. And that in itself made Severus fear most of what Remus would think of him. He didn't want Remus turning from him in disgust at what he'd allowed himself to become, even if till now he hadn't realized that was all he had been back then. But the look in Remus's eyes was too much for him, and with a sigh he nodded his head.

"Alright Remus, I'll tell you...but I warn you now...what you'll hear...it's...I'm not proud of...and I'm not talking bout being a Death Eater because that would be actually easy to talk about compared to some things..." Severus said nervously.

Remus could hear the anxiety in Severus's voice, and knew he was worried. Walking over to him he took Severus's chin in his hand and said in a soft voice, "Severus Snape listen to me. I promise you on everything I hold holy that I will never think less of you...I didn't walk away from you when I found out you were a Death Eater...and no matter you tell me next I still won't. You're my lifemate, I love you...and I always will..."

Severus couldn't even respond, he just swept Remus into his arms and gave him a tight hug. He let his body talk for him, pouring out his love and feelings for Remus, along with his fears and hopes. And Remus understood it all, and returned it in kind.

Breaking apart the hug after a few moments, Remus said, "Come on Sev, let's get some food...it's always better to talk on a full stomach don't you think?" he said with a small smile, easing the tensions.

Severus smiled back and nodded, relieved that for the moment he'd have a reprieve from telling Remus the truth. "Yes you're right. Let's go find that pear then shall we?"

Half an hour later, arms laden with all sorts of dishes from the helpful house-elves in the kitchen, they were halfway back to the dungeons when they got stopped by Albus. "Ah, just the two people I needed to see," he said though he didn't have his traditional smile, nor the twinkle in his eyes.

"Err..Albus...couldn't this wait an hour or so? We haven't quite had our dinner yet..." Remus began but a wave of Albus's hand cut him off.

"No no I'm afraid it won't. I need the both of you to come to my office right now if you would please. You can have your meal there, but it is very important," he said firmly, and with that swept off towards his offices.

Severus scowled. "Typical. Just like McGonagall, he always knows when people don't wish to be bothered."

"Right now I"m inclined to believe that myself." Remus said with a mutter, but in the end they did head themselves over to Albus's office.

The said the password for the day which was "Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans" and headed up the spiral staircase to the main office. They were surprised however that when they got there they weren't alone. In fact, everyone from The Order was there as well, and they were a bit solemn faced at that. Dropping the food on Albus's desk, no longer even hungry at the somber tone in the room, they took a seat next to each other on one of the sofas that had been saved for them.

"Albus...James...Sirius? What's going on?" Remus said worriedly, looking from one to the other.

Albus sighed and nodded. "I'm afraid we some bad news. Terrible news really, and it was at James's request we're having this meeting now," he said somberly.

"James? What is it? What's wrong? Did something happen?" Remus said puzzled and suddenly afraid. Now that he looked at his friend he could see traces of tears shed earlier, in fact it looked as if James had been crying for a while now.

James sighed deeply and nodded to his friend. "Something awful's happened Remy...I...I can't even believe it myself...." he said and to Remus's surprise a fresh wave of tears started to flow. Getting up he walked over and put his arm round James, comforting him.

"Oh James.....tell me what happened....please?" he said softly.

"Oh Remy! They're dead! He...he killed them just like that!" James blurted out through his tears, his sobs coming louder now.

"Dead? Who? Who's dead James?" Remus said very concerned now. "Not...not Lily and Harry? Tell me it's not them!"

James shook his head and sniffed. "No...it's not them, thank gods for that. They were there at the house but Lily apparated out just in time...but...she...she couldn't save them....I should have been there....I should have been there!" he said wailing now.

"James, it's not your fault. You didn't know, none of us did. We never thought they'd be at risk...." Arabella said softly.

"Will someone please tell me what the bloody hell happened already?" Remus said a bit exasperated now.

"Remus...it's...the Evanses. They...Lily had taken Harry over there to see her parents and...." Arthur said quietly, but found he couldn't go on either.

Sirius took over, his own voice breaking with tears still. "Voldemort must have been keeping an eye on their home Remy. Like Arabella said...we never thought they'd be at risk for...for something like this. James had to do some work at the ministry yesterday and...Lily decided to take the baby to her parents for the afternoon...."

"And that's when it happened. It wasn't Voldemort himself from what Lily said but...well right now she's not really thinking clearly...she's not sure what she saw," Alastor said with a light grunt.

"They...they're dead then..." Remus said in a flat tone of voice, and James nodded through his sobbing.

"Yeah...oh gods Remy...I should have been there! I could have done something...anything! They were like my own parents Remy, I was a son to them..and now...they're gone! Just like my real parents! He takes away everything...everyone I love!" James said balling his fist up angrily. "He'll pay for this, I swear he will pay!"

"James please! I know you're upset right now but you cannot just think it will be that easy..." Albus began quietly.

"NO Albus! Not this time! I'm sick of it, I won't let him get away with it anymore! What good is being who I am if I can't protect the people I love? Tell me Albus? Huh? What good is it?!" James screamed now.

"James enough! Much as I hate to say this, you cannot take on Voldemort and the entire group of Death Eaters yourself, especially when you're not thinking clearly. Trust me on this, I know better then anyone. You cannot just waltz in without a plan James, not if you want to live," Severus said now stepping into the conversation.

James glared at Severus almost as if all this was his fault and Remus didn't exactly like that. "James he's right. I know you don't want to hear it, least of all from him, but he is right. I know this is hard on you, gods know I loved Lily's parents too, but if you want revenge, anger isn't going to solve anything," Remus said softly.

James choked back another sob and lowered his head, his anger leaving him. "Oh Remy..." he sighed deeply. "You're right, you're both right. I'm just so tired of burying the people I love...."

"We will avenge everyone James, we will...but we've got to have a plan first," Remus said gently, handing James a linen handkerchief of his.

"And that Remus, is part of what is your goal for us now," Albus said quietly causing Remus and Severus to look at his sharply.

"What do you mean Albus? What goal?" Severus said more sharply then he probably should have.

"Now Severus, you were both aware that Remus couldn't stay here once term starts. I had hoped that I could have waited until that time, unfortunately this event speeds up matters. Remus, I'm am sorry on this but tomorrow I am going to have to ask you to leave and begin your journeys," Albus said leveling his gaze on Remus.

Remus stared at him in shock, surely he hadn't just heard what he thought he had. "T-tomorrow? Not....not...t-tomorrow Albus...." Remus said in a whisper.

Albus sighed and nodded his head. "I'm afraid so Remus. If I could, believe me, I would wait. But there is far more at stake now than I first realized. Voldemort is growing stronger, and though till now I have slightly hoped my reports were wrong, it seems they are not. You did agree when you joined The Order that you would do what was necessary to protect the wizarding world, and I ask no less of that from you now."

Though Remus was feeling dizzy and faint at the thought of leaving Severus so soon, he knew Albus was right. He had made a promise to him and The Order, and he would not back down now. Walking over and sitting down next to Severus, not even realizing that he had slipped his hand into Severus's own hand, he nodded his head.

"What do you want me do to Albus?" he said in a strong voice, and knew that if ever he needed to be a Gryffindor with courage and bravery, this was the time.

* * * * *