An Experiment Gone Wrong

Severus Snape, Potions Master of Hogwarts and head of Slytherin House, was glaring. This year seemed to be a test of his patience for some reason, more so then the last 5 years he'd had these particular people in his dungeon classroom. The last class of his day would have to be double Potions with Gryffindor and Slytherin houses he groaned inwardly.

All the other years this class was either in mornings or afternoons, but this year Albus had decided to move it up to the last, making for a very irritable Potions professor. Another problem with this time slot was the these particular houses were apparently at their utmost worst at this time of day as well. As usual, the Gryffindors had gone and made a mess of things this class, particularly Neville Longbottom.

He sighed. He really had no grudge against this boy other then the fact he seemed to be a total Squib in almost everything, and worse, couldn't manage to make a single potion correctly without the help of Granger the know-it-all. Even when he did them right, it was more of a fluke then anything else. He had finally given up pairing him with anyone but Granger at this point, figuring at least his potions wouldn't either melt or blow up. He really didn't think he could handle much more of the boys ineptness this year. And to think he still had one more year to go with Longbottom, which didn't please him at all.

Seeing Potter and Weasley at the moment whispering about something and grinning didn't help his already blackened mood either. Obviously they were so busy not paying attention to him that they'd slipped in 2 more bat wings then the potion called for. "Potter, Weasley! 5 points from Gryffindor for not paying attention and adding too many bat wings! Anymore of that and you'll both be serving detentions!" he yelled out gruffly. The look on both boys faces was priceless, though did little to ease his mood.

Unfortunately the 2 extra added bat wings wasn't very acceptable to the potion that the class had been making. If Severus had been paying more attention himself, he would have realized this, but as it was he didn't until it was too late. Moments later as he was just bout to get to the cauldron, a loud "BOOM" echoed round the classroom and Ron Weasley, Harry Potter and one very irate Severus Snape were covered in a sticky gooey pink liquid.

"That's IT! Detentions for both of you for the next week! And 20 points off - EACH!" Severus barked out totally disgusted now and glared at the two boys with a look that even his own house seemed to cringe from. "Clean this up - NOW! And report to me tomorrow after dinner for you're first detention!" he said with a hiss.

"Draco, watch everyone while I go clean up. Anyone steps out of queue and they'll wish they hadn't," he said glaring at the rest of the class now, Slytherin's included, which notably were subdued. He doubted that they would get out of queue again now, but you never could tell.

He finished cleaning himself up quickly, rejoined the classroom and relieved Draco Malfoy, the only student who actually was any good in his class other then Granger, and thankfully was one of his house. For the rest of the class Ron and Harry cleaned the floors, walls and anywhere else the goo had gotten on, whilst Severus kept a firm eye on them and the class, walking round the boys making sure they got every last drop cleaned up.

Finally the bell sounded ending the class, and the room was once again empty, this time for the rest of the evening. He sat down in his chair wearily, and something on his desk caught his eye. It was the lunar calendar, and it had a red circle round tonight's date. For a second he forgot why it was circled as such, then he saw why, the moon phase. Tonight was the full moon, and that brought back a lot of memories. Painful memories. He closed his eyes, going back in time to nearly 17 years ago when everything in his world seemed to begin to turn upside down.

* * * * *

"But professor, you cant be serious! Your not old enough to retire now, why do you even think about it?" the young man said both angry and puzzled.

"This is what I've been preparing you for during the past year, even though I never actually let on. The truth is Severus, I'm ill, quite ill actually, and I want to spend the remainder of the time I have left in peace. I'm sure you can understand this."

"Ill?! But..but...there's 'nothing' Madame Pomfrey cant fix! How can a wizard get ill? I thought..."

The professor cut him off with a wave of his hand and sat down wearily at his desk. "Normally you're right, wizarding medicines and chemists are quite more advanced then those in the Muggle world. However, in this case, neither magical, nor Muggle medicines can cure what's wrong with me. I've searched the world over, both Muggle and wizarding alike, but alas I was in vain, there is no cure for this ailment. I could prolong my life if I so choose, but I have chosen not to. I"m truly sorry m'boy, I regret leaving believe me. But with my recommendations, Albus has agreed to my request.

"Request sir? What do you mean?" the boy said still very much puzzled what could possibly be wrong that wizarding medicines or a good potion couldn't cure, and still very upset by this man's sudden departure.

The man looked deeply at Severus. To the eyes of the boy, he seemed far older then his 40 something years of age. By wizarding standards, 40's were young as wizards and witches tended to have a lifespan far longer then ordinary Muggles. He studied the boy carefully now, taking in everything about him. He wasn't much to look at, certainly not 'attractive' like those Gryffindor boys Potter, Black and Lupin, even Lucius Malfoy had more attractiveness to him being part Veela. His personality was one of indifference, cold and withdrawn really, and certainly not popular with either males or females as the professor had never seen him date either sex.

But that's not what drew this man to the boy. It was his potion making skills that first got his attention since the first weeks of school 7 years prior. The boy had a knack for potions, and over the years had turned into quite an accomplished potions expert. And if truth be told, this man felt that the boy before him could probably teach him a few tricks of the trade. This boy was sheer brilliance, no doubts bout that. Granted he was also tuned to the dark arts was a plus, but it was strictly the potions that he'd had in mind when he'd spoken to Albus Dumbledore a few days ago. Yes, the position he'd suggested would serve this boy well.

"I'm going to tell you the truth behind why I must leave Severus. I couldn't tell you sooner, not while I was still your professor, for reasons, but now it doesn't matter. I know you, and I know you'll keep my secrets safe. You're like a son to me Severus, I always regretted not following the one person who meant more then the world to me. If you ever do get the chance to have a child, take it, for sometimes even potions can't replace what the feeling of love and being loved is like. There was someone, long ago when I went to school here, but things happened, and it couldn't work out with us. Too many external differences, and we parted ways, though we never forgot each other. As if I could ever forget him," the professor said, a lost look in his eyes.

"Him sir?" Severus said surprised. He'd never expected his friend, his mentor to be that way.

The professor nodded, a sad smile across his face. "Yes him. I knew from when I was young what I felt towards men Severus. A lifemate is a lifemate, the sex rarely matters. Which is why even some purebloods have had to mix with Muggles and halfbreeds over years just to keep the bloodlines going. He was a Ravenclaw however, smart as a whip, but none too courageous I'm afraid. When the wars started in the early 40's, his family decided to turn tail and run, moving as far from England as possible," he said rather sadly now.

"They went to America actually. They thought they'd be safe there, and luckily they were. Yes, the wizarding and Muggle wars kept their attacks here in Europe thank the gods, but even when it was all over, he and his family stayed there. They're still there today. We kept in touch over the years, but till now we've never seen each other since that time. It's to him now I am going, to spend my time happy. He doesn't even care what's wrong with me, he still loves me as much as I love him." The man gave a small almost hidden smile at those words.

"Sir? May I...may I ask what exactly 'is' wrong with you?" Severus said slowly, his mind still reeling by the previous information.

The older man looked at him and sighed deeply. He knew this was coming, expected it really when he'd told Albus a few weeks ago about his decision to leave at the end of term. Nodding his head towards the boy, he began his tale.

"Very well, I'll tell you. You might recall that last summer I told you I was going to visit my sister in Siberia. Gods know why she had to live in such a barren place, but her husband was doing some work regarding dark creatures for the ministry, and there was a nice infestation of them in that part of the world. They had warned me never to leave the house after dusk, because the types of creatures there usually came out after that time. How my brother in law was able to go out there was beyond me, but he did."

"One day however, my sister decided to join him in his studies, she did sometimes I gathered. They told me they would be back by around midnight, and not to venture to go looking for them. I certainly didn't. A little past midnight I heard a sound outside, and I foolishly opened the door thinking it was them, but it wasn't. Not by any means." The professors eyes seemed to show an emotion that almost made Severus's blood run cold. It was fear he saw, pure fear in those eyes.

"Sir, if you're not up to this..." he began, but was again cut off.

"No, I have to tell you. You have to understand Severus. I knew my brother in law was investigation several dark creatures, I hadn't somehow registered one of those was the..the werewolf. A predator that during the full moon has no sense of right or wrong, only of killing and death. It was this very creature that was now before me. A giant grey wolf with almost human eyes. My mistake perhaps was looking into those eyes, and not running. It cornered me inside the house, and before I knew it, had attacked," he said and a visible shiver ran down his body.

"It ripped open my leg, and I could hear myself screaming with pain. Next thing I know I heard a shot behind the creature and it was dead. My brother in law and sister were there, they had shot it with a silver bullet. Silver, depending on the strength of it, will kill a werewolf outright, though in small doses or unpure silver, it will only poison it. But I digress. You know this already from the study you had I believe in Defense Against the Dark Arts class earlier this year on werewolves yes?"

Severus nodded, unsure to trust his voice. They had indeed, studied werewolves earlier that year, but that wasn't the only reason he knew all about them. There was a certain Gryffindor, Remus Lupin, who was one as well. He found out the hard way after a nasty joke played by Sirius Black last year, one which nearly cost him his life. Though he knew it had been his own fault for reasons he would never admit to anyone, and he highly regretted Potter had been the one to save him.

In the end, he found out what Lupin was, how he could have missed it from the last name actually was beyond him, but Dumbledore had a talking to him and forced him to never reveal what he had found out. Severus may have been a lot of things, but he wasn't a fool, and he knew better then to cross Albus Dumbledore. Not to mention he certainly couldn't afford to be expelled from school.

The professor continued with his tale. "Since you already know bout them, you know then that once someone is bitten, there's a high chance, in point of fact, an almost 99% chance that they too will be turned. Alas, I was not to be in that last 1%. I found out all too well on the next full moon what had been done to me, and what I had now become. I begged my sister and brother in law after that to destroy me, but they refused. They sat me down after the transformation and told me with my knowledge of Potions, I of all people should be able to find a way to combat this. Though my brother in law had pointedly told me there was no 'cure', he had heard of cases of werewolves being able to be calmed during the transformations. I spent the rest of the summer going all over the world to see what I could find, though there wasn't much to go on."

"Obviously I wasn't about to reveal why I wanted this information, even to a wizard a werewolf is a shunnable offense, not even really human anymore. Just a beast, a monster if you will. But in the end, I did find a person to speak with me. An old man in China who knew of many herbs that could possibly help. Believe it or not, he was a Muggle, not a wizard. How he found out about me I still don't know, but he did, and he wasn't afraid of me."

"For nearly a week, he and I devised methods using certain herbs and such to help. And in the end, we did indeed come up with something. Though only temporary, the 'Wolfsbane Potion' would keep me calm long enough to get through the transformations. Luckily, there was one more full moon before term started and I was able to test the remedy, and indeed, it worked. The old Chinese man sat with me during the whole time, and I was basically rendered immune to the internal urges of the wolf. However, this came with a price."

"What price sir?" Severus said, reeling from the fact that his friend had just revealed such a secret to him, and not sure how to react yet.

"A very heavy one I'm afraid young Severus. True this potion did it's job, but it has a very nasty side effect. One of the main ingredients is nightshade, commonly referred to as belladonna, I know you're aware of it?"

"Yes sir, of course. I believe however, that in small doses it is only poisonous, but in a large dose, it can kill in a short time frame, which is why some dark wizards tend to use it. It's taste is concealable and it's very easy to ground into a fine powder which can be placed in food or drinks." Severus said, glad he'd remembered that from Herbology.

The professor smiled. "Very good, you do indeed know your herbs. Unfortunately, for this potion, nightshade is a main ingredient, which as you know, if taken on a steady basis, even if it's once a month, has the unfortunate side effect of poisoning the body. Since the quantity required in the potion is not great, but not small either, the poison never has a chance to fully leave my body from month to month. Which is why now, a year later, I'm suffering from the consequences. I've been able to hide my transformations right here in my rooms at Hogwarts, and Albus has made sure that I have always had a cover-up for the day of the full moon. I have to take the Wolfsbane Potion over a week before the actual transformation, but now sadly, I can no longer do this. The poison has caught up with me Severus, and I'm dying, simple as that," he said sadly, knowing how upset his young student was going to be.

"Dying?! But...but professor..isn't there any way to fight this? It's not your fault what's happened to you, it's not fair! There's got to be a way to fight this!" Severus said, not angry really but feeling betrayed.

The professor shook his head. "I wish there were Severus, I truly wish there were. Now I am tired of fighting it really, I don't have the energy to carry on teaching, nor fighting against what I am. I want to go live with David in America and be happy for what time I have left, nothing more. For you young man however, it was my recommendation to Albus that I want you to take over my position. I know you're young, but you have a mind for Potions that I've never seen in anyone, not even myself. You're sheer brilliance, understanding and knowledge of Potions is pure amazement to me sometimes. And I can think of no one better I'd trust giving up my position here to you," he said then, smiling with true sincerity at Severus.

Severus was stunned. "M-m-me? I...I couldn't...I mean...are you sure? What if I fail you? What if I mess it all up? I...I..."

"Severus Snape, you are the only reason I'm even willing to leave. If I thought my job was going to be handed out to a bungled git, I'd stay. But I know this job is in good hands. You will do fine. Have trust in yourself Severus, I do." He smiled.

Severus swallowed and nodded, precariously close to tears. "I will sir. And I promise you that one day I will even perfect that potion of yours...'Wolfsbane" right? Leave me the list of ingredients, I will see to it. No one should suffer like this, not even...." Severus said stopping himself from revealing the name he promised he wouldn't.

He tried desperately to hate Remus Lupin for that time a year ago, in the end he couldn't, not after he finally realized it wasn't really Lupin's fault but Black's. Lupin had been nothing more then an innocent pawn in a game of jealous hatreds. Instead he tried to hate Lupin for what he was, a monster...a pariah on the wizarding and Muggle worlds. But now his friend, his mentor was the same thing, and he began to open up to seeing Lupin in a new light once again.

Almost as if his professor was reading his thoughts he said, "I knew this would be hard on you Severus, but I'm glad to see you have the convictions I told Albus you would. You should know that I knew what Remus Lupin was the moment I came back from the summer holidays, and sure enough, he sniffed me out immediately as well. Little thing about being a werewolf, always know your kind." He chuckled.

"He never approached me though, nor I him about it. We both tended to stick to ourselves during transformations. But we both know the pain of what we are. Severus, help him. I never gave him the Wolfsbane Potion, I couldn't bear the thought of destroying his life anymore then it would already be once he realized how difficult it was going to be out in the world of werebeast haters. I was grateful Albus allowed me to continue here at school even. If you can one day, perfect the potion, seek Remus out and help him, if nothing else...as a last request from me." He had a look of sadness now again in his eyes that even Severus couldn't say no to.

Severus sighed, it hurt him to know that he was losing the only person he could ever called 'friend', "All right professor, I will, for your sake....and his. Will I see you again after today?" he said hopeful.

"No, I think not. I'm leaving right after dinner for America, flooing out from Hogsmeade. I'm not one for long, drawn out goodbyes, nor are you I'd imagine, so I wont, I'll just leave you with those words. Take care of yourself Severus, feel free to post me if you want at David's, Albus had the address. Good luck with the potion. Goodbye Severus," he said softly, wishing against wish that it didn't have to end like this.

"Take care too professor, I will write. Thank you." Severus nodded to his professor and turned and walked out of the classroom. When he got outside he stopped to replay the events in his mind, making sure it was all for real. He knew he had a lot to learn about teaching Potions, but he knew he'd had a very good role model in what to do, so he felt confident he'd be all right. He had no clue of course, that but a short time later, events would happen that would make him become what he worst feared, and that his life was going to take a drastic turn, possibly for the worse.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~