The Adventures of Larry Porter

First Day

Larry awoke early the next day and looked around the room that he shared with the three other Hufflepuffs. He was hesitant to call them boys because he was not sure he could tell without closer examination, and he definitely didn't want to get that close. He had slept with one eye open just in case. He quietly showered, got dressed and headed out the portal of the Hufflepuff common room. Larry was hungry and he was not sure where he was supposed to go for breakfast. He stopped the first person he saw in the hallway, a rather self important looking fellow who appeared to be a couple of years older than Larry.

"Oi, mate, can you tell me where a fellow can get some grub around here?"

Looking disdainfully down his nose at Larry, the older boy replied. "You would think that they would do a better job of keeping the first-years informed as to what is going on around here, or that the first-years would pull their heads out and pay better attention when their betters were instructing them."

Larry smiled and whispered in a voice so low that the other boy couldn't hear him. The boy then did exactly what Larry wanted him to do; he lowered his head so that he could hear.

"THUNK!"

As soon as the boy had bent down, Larry head-butted him, dropping the older boy like a felled ox.

"I suggest that you pull your head out mate, so that you don't fall for that one again."

Now, with a slight headache, Larry continued his quest for food, leaving the older boy in a heap on the hallway floor. He rounded a corner and saw three girls ahead of him; they were giggling and talking about what they were going to have for breakfast.

"Ladies, do you mind if I tag along, I'm afraid that I don't know the way to the dining hall."

The girls stopped and took a long look at Larry. They were a little older than Larry, but his disarming good looks seemed to appeal to them so they bade him follow them.

"Sure you don't mind walking with all us girls?" asked the pretty blonde one.

"Mind...?" "Why luv, I would imagine I will be the envy of every boy in the place when I walk in with you lovelies!"

The girls all giggled excitedly. Larry may have been a little prick, but he certainly had a way with the women.

In no time at all they arrived at the Great Hall; Larry immediately spotted Patty.

"Sorry to leave you my lovelies but I have a previous engagement. Perhaps we can share breakfast another time?"

The girls all looked disappointed and waved as Larry headed for the Gryffindor table, where he plopped down beside Patty.

"Morning luv, how do I get something to eat?"

"How would you like to get to your own table, Hufflepuff?" asked a boy with curly red hair and a gold badge on his chest.

"How would you like to have that badge stuck up your ar-"

"It's all right Percy. Unfortunately he is with me, special assignment for Professor Dumbledore," said Patty.

"Well mind your manners if you are going to sit here, first-year," said a very pompous sounding Percy Weasley.

"Or what, you sanctimonious piece of sh-"

"Larry, that is quite enough," said Patty with an edge to her voice that would have cut wood.

"Geeze, Patty, all I wanted was some breakfast and ferret-face here-"

At that moment, a golden plate popped up in front of Larry and all sorts of other dishes appeared on the table, dishes filled with scrambled eggs, ham, bacon and toast. There were also bowls of hot cereal and jugs of pumpkin juice, along with pots of hot tea. In front of Larry, there appeared a special pitcher.

"Oi mate, what's that you have there?" asked a brown skinned boy sitting across from Larry.

Larry took a sniff from the pitcher and smiled, it was hot coffee.

"Seems like the cooks here have my preferences down," smirked Larry.

Percy looked at Larry with contempt and stomped off.

"Who is that git, Patty?"

"That git is Percy Weasley. He is a prefect, he has authority over you, you had better straighten up and show some respect for him."

"Hey, did you guys hear? A sixth-year Ravenclaw boy was assaulted in one of the third floor hallways. I guess he has a concussion and has been taken to hospital," announced a Gryffindor boy who had just shown up for breakfast.

Larry kept his head down and concentrated on his breakfast, not saying a word. He could feel Patty's eyes boring into him.

"I'm not going to ask if you know anything about that, Larry."

Larry just shrugged his shoulders and continued to feed.

As two more boys now joined the group, Patty gave Larry a nudge and whispered in his ear, "See the boy on the left, the one with the scar on his forehead? That's your cousin, that's Harry Potter."

"Humph... doesn't look like much to me."

"Well, he is, and you had better find a way to make friends with him so that you can get close to him."

"Oh, right..."

"Hey there, red," said Larry to the boy sitting next to Harry. "I remember you from the train station, had a nice little chat with your Sis and your Mum, I'm Larry Porter."

"Uh... Ron Weasley... and this is Harry Potter."

"Hi Potter, nice to meet you," said Larry in a matter-of-fact way.

The others at the table noticed immediately that Larry didn't seem too impressed with who Harry Potter was.

"Larry was raised by Muggles, he doesn't know much," explained Patty.

"Hey-".

"Oh, all right, he doesn't know much about our world, yet," conceded Patty.

"Me too; brought up by Muggles that is," said Harry with a friendly smile.

He doesn't seem like such a bad sort, Larry thought to himself, maybe this won't be so bad after all.

"If you are in Hufflepuff, what are you doing at the Gryffindor table?" asked a voice from a new arrival.

It's miss fuzzy top, thought Larry.

"He is working with me on a special assignment for Professor Dumbledore. Do you have a problem with that... Miss... Granger isn't it?

"Yes, Hermione Granger, I was just curious, no offense meant."

"None taken," replied Patty, with a sickening sweet smile.

"Hey there fuzzy top, remember me?" asked Larry, beaming at Hermione with his most charming smile.

"Uh... yes, Porter isn't it? And my name is Hermione."

"Ah yes, Hermione, that sure is a mouthful, I'll have to work out a nickname for you."

Hermione looked at Larry with more than just a little disdain as she took her seat at the table.

"Attention please everyone, I have your class schedules," announced a rather severe looking witch who had just arrived at the table. Larry remembered her from the ill fated sorting feast; she was Professor McGonagall, she taught 'transmissions' or something like that. Larry was excited about having the opportunity to work on cars.

"Larry, you had better get over to the Hufflepuff table to get your class schedule," whispered Patty.

"No need for that Miss Disbro," said Professor McGonagall with a note of irritation in her voice. "I have Mr. Porter's schedule with me. I have just come from a meeting with Professor Dumbledore; he explained to me that even though Mr. Porter is a Hufflepuff, he will be attending classes with the Gryffindors. The need for this was not explained to me, but I am sure Professor Dumbledore has a good reason. I do know that this decision came about as the result of some type of compromise between Professor Dumbledore and the Sorting Hat; it seems they had been arguing about switching Mr. Porter to Gryffindor house but the Sorting Hat would have none of it. So, in lieu of switching houses, Mr. Porter is taking classes with the Gryffindors and the Sorting Hat is in therapy."

Larry accepted his schedule and looked at it disapprovingly when he realized that Professor McGonagall taught 'Transfiguration' and not 'Transmissions'.

Patty moved closer to Larry and whispered in his ear. "I imagine that this is part of Dumbledore's plan. You take classes with the Gryffindors so that you can stay closer to Harry."

"Well, the class thing is okay, but I still don't like having to be in Hufflepuff with all of those wussies..."

"Speaking of the Hufflepuffs, I think it would be a good idea for you to join them for the remainder of breakfast, you know, to get to know them better."

"Aw... Patty, do I have to? Sitting with them will spoil my appetite."

"Go, Larry!"

With a few muttered swear words, Larry ambled over to the Hufflepuff table and inserted himself between two first year Hufflepuff girls.

"Hi," said the girl to his right. "Isn't this exciting? I see that our first class today is transfiguration, we have it with Ravenclaw; I can't wait."

"Erm... well, I'm on a different schedule than you. I have potions the first thing this morning, with Gryffindor."

"Potions...? How come you're on a different schedule Larry? Aren't you going to have any classes with us?" asked a first year boy from across the other side of the table.

"It's a special deal," said Larry glancing at his housemates, who all looked at him with an aura of mistrust on their faces.

"Don't you want to have classes with us, Larry?" asked Simone, the girl on his right.

"Well, er... ah... it's not that, it's just what I've been told to do and I always do what I am told." Larry laughed inwardly at his last statement...

There was suddenly a disturbance from further down the Hufflepuff table. A couple of big oafs who were wearing the colors of Slytherin had surrounded a tiny little Hufflepuff girl. They had evidently taken something from her and were merrily playing a game of keep-away, while she was in tears at her vain efforts to retrieve her possession. Harry recognized the two goons as the ones who had been harassing that Longbottom kid in Diagon Alley. They had taken a little figurine of a cat from the girl and were tossing it back and forth over her head. The next time the one called Crabbe tossed the figurine; Larry deftly stepped in and snatched it out of the air.

"Hey, what are you-" Crabbe started to say, but then he immediately recognized Larry and he began to back up. The other one, Goyle, did not seem to want to tangle with Larry again either. Both of them beat a hasty retreat to the Slytherin table where they huddled up with a blond haired surly looking boy.

Larry handed the figurine back to the little girl.

"Thank you ever so much," she managed to get out between sobs. "This little cat was the last present my Mummy gave me before she died, I don't know what I would do if anything happened to it. Those two boys have been picking on all the Hufflepuffs, they are quite frightening."

"Don't you worry about those two sugar; I can handle them. My name is Larry, Larry Porter."

"Oh thank you Larry, you are ever so kind... and brave. My name is Betty, Betty Whiteside."

"Pleased to meet you Betty..."

Larry turned and looked around at the Hufflepuff table; it seemed as if the eyes of everyone there were locked on him.

"I wish you were around all of the time Larry, I think those two are going to be nothing but trouble for us all year," said a brown haired boy who had a look of fear in his eyes.

A smile crossed Larry's face as he realized that this was a chance for his first business opportunity at Hogwarts.

"Tell you what mates. How about we enter into a little business arrangement? Let's say for... oh... three Knuts a week, each, I will supply you protection from those two goofs and anyone else who might want to mess with you."

The Hufflepuffs chatted excitedly amongst themselves; it appeared that Larry's idea was being met with a great deal of enthusiasm... from everyone but Betty that is.

Betty slowly turned away from the group and sat down by herself at the end of the Hufflepuff table. A small tear glistened on her cheek as she lowered her head.

"I wonder what's wrong with her," Larry said to himself.

A little Hufflepuff boy standing next to Larry spoke up, "Her family is very poor. I would imagine that three Knuts a week is quite beyond her means. It's a shame, she probably needs your help more than anyone else and at the same time she is the least able to afford it. By the way, I'm Chauncy, Chauncy Nightengale."

Chauncy, I would have bet on it, thought Larry to himself.

Larry continued to watch Betty as she hung her head and sobbed silently. As he watched, a strange feeling came over him; it was like nothing that he had ever felt before. There was a feeling of sadness, a tightening of his stomach, a sudden desire to do something about little Betty's situation. Larry was feeling compassion... he didn't like it at all.

Larry plopped himself down beside Betty.

"Hey sugar, I was wondering if I could get you to help me out with something."

Betty turned to Larry, trying to hide her tears. "Sure, Larry, I would do anything for you. You have been so kind to me. What can I do?"

"Well sugar it's like this. It looks like most if not all of the Hufflepuffs are going to take me up on my offer of seeing to it that they aren't bothered by those Slytherin goons or anyone else for that matter. That's a lot of people to keep track of every week, to make sure that they have paid and all. With the special assignment I am working on for Dumbledore, I just don't see how I can handle it all. If my little enterprise is going to succeed I am going to need an assistant. What say you take the job luv? You mark it down when people pay, sort of keep a record for me. In return, I will provide you with protection and pay you three Knuts a week. What do you say?"

"Oh Larry!" Betty squealed. "I would love to help you. Three Knuts a week, that's so much. Are you sure that isn't too much? Oh yes, yes, yes... I'll do it! I'll do a good job for you!"

Betty threw her arms around Larry and gave him a tight hug. Larry smiled; pleased with himself that his sudden attack of compassion didn't keep him from noticing that little Betty's boobies were coming along nicely...