The Infinite Theatre

Chapter 4

Infinite Theater Les Miserables Cast:

Company:

Jean Valjean: Rubeus Hagrid

Javert: Severus Snape

Marius: James Potter

Eponine: Lily Evans

Fantine: Molly Weasley

Cosette: Narcissa Malfoy

Thenardier: Arthur Weasley

Enjolras: Sirius Black

Madame Thenardier: Penny Artichoke

Gavroche: Bill Weasley

Young Cosette/Eponine: Nymphadora Tonks, Hestia Jones

Ensemble:

Barricade Boys:

Fuilly: Remus Lupin

Joly: Peter Pettigrew

Combeferre: Gareth Corner

Courfeyrac: Timmy Sparks

Grantaire: Frank Longbottom

Provaire: Eric Braque

Lesgles: Mark Foil

Whores:

Whores will be appearing in Javert's death as the barricade women.

Whore 1: Bellatrix Black

Whore 2: Rolanda Hooch

Whore 3: Sandra Sinistra

Whore 4: Marsha Vector

Whore 5: Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank

Whore 6: Jane Shawte

Whore 7 :Emmeline Vance

Whore 8: Amelia Bones

Factory Girls:

Factory girls are also doubling as Barricade Chorus

Factory Girl 1: Dolores Umbridge

Factory Girl 2: Arabella Figg

Factory Girl 3: Poppy Pomfrey

Factory Girl 4: Irma Pince

Factory Girl 5: Catherine Crouch

Solo Roles

Bishop: Albus Dumbledore

Fauchelevant: Harvetis Ollivander

Claquesous: Antonin Dolohov

Bamatbois: Lucius Malfoy

Labourer: Florean Fortescue

Farmer: Zach Zair

Constable 1: Cornelius Fudge

Constable 2: George Croaker

Dual Roles:

Foreman/Convict 1: Amos Diggory

Pimp/Convict 2: Quirenius Quirrell

Montparnesse/Sailor 1/Convict 3: Walden MacNair

Brujon/Sailor 2/Convict 4: Gregory Kickle

Babet/Sailor 3/Convict 5: John Sykes

Nun/Beggar: Pomonoa Sprout

Hair Lady/Beggar: Minerva McGonagall

Beggars/ Chorus:

Those who will be appearing in scenes such as The Wedding and all Barricade scenes as well as others.

Tylie Kuipers

Alicia Kober

Donna Vilniff

Krishna Fishner

Aaron Hamilton

Ted Lewis

William Aguire

Dillan Seymour

Jahn VanEgmond

Ken Kapteyn

Alana Sambey

Danielle Gray

Tiffany Fox

Genevieve Romard

Ian Shanahan

Jared Williams

Amber Ear

Tyler Plum

____________________________________________

"Oh, God," Lily groaned, reeling slightly backward.

"Hey, steady there," Remus said catching her elbow.

"I got Marius," James said quietly, a small, pleased smile on his face, as if he were concealing his pleasure, lest it showed weakness.

"Who the hell is Ahnjollrass?" Sirius asked, sounding out the word.

"And Jolly?" Peter asked.

"Oh God," Lily repeated, scanning the sheet of parchment tacked to the the window of the Infinite again.

"Eponine?" Remus said, reading the name correctly, "is that what you wanted?"

"Y-yes," Lily managed, looking again. "B-but, how? I think I need to sit down," she said, flopping down on the sidewalk.

"O...K..." James said, exchanging glances with Remus; Sirius was still sounding out his character name, "what's say we go over to the Lion's Den?"

They managed to drag Lily into the corner booth and forced a few sips of tea into her before she would register what had happened.

"So, you are happy, right?" James asked hopefully, passing Sirius the rare cup of coffee he had ordered.

"I guess, yes. Yes I am completely happy," Lily finished properly.

Then, after a few silent moments, she added, "for you."

"Lily!" James groaned, "what's wrong with Eeponinee?"

"Eponine," Remus corrected.

"Right? What's wrong with that part?"

"Nothing, I'm just kidding. I guess I'm just surprised that I was up there with the Company. I really didn't expect much."

"Why not? You kicked arse in your auditions," Sirius said, pouring a frightening amount of sugar from the tip of his wand.

"Thank-you Sirius!" Lily said, surprised at his bout of kindness.

"Besides, the Swiggley bloke said Eponinee wasa good part, from the summary he gave," James said.

"Oh, I'm sure she is," Lily agreed.

"Hey, did you see who got a whore?" Sirius said, pulling the sheet of parchment from his cloak pocket.

"Sirius, did you steal that from the window?" Lily demanded, snatching it away.

"I didn't not steal it!" Sirius said defensively, reaching for it.

"But that means you did-" Lily sighed haughtily, burying her eyes in her palm. "Nevermind. Who got a whore, Sirius?"

"None other than my darling ickle cousin Bella," Sirius announced, pointing to the parchment where a list of women's names were stated beside a list of whores:

Whores:

Whores will be appearing in Javert's death as the barricade women.

Whore 1: Bellatrix Black

Whore 2: Rolanda Hooch

Whore 3: Sandra Sinistra

Whore 4: Marsha Vector

Whore 5: Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank

Whore 6: Jane Shawte

Whore 7 :Emmeline Vance

Whore 8

: Amelia Bones

_________________________________________

"She's Whore #1," Remus observed, tilting the parchment towards him.

"Well of course she is!" Sirius said in a drawling voice, "and she probably slept with every member of the casting board to get it!"

"Augh! Swiggley? Dumbledore?"

"Oh, c'mon, Prongs! I know Swiggley looks pretty gay, but Bella wouldn't give a rat's arse what he was wearing. Clothes come off."

"And Dumbledore's got those dreamy blue eyes," Lily said with a grin, nudging James' side.

"Hey, speaking of Swiggley, Lily, I wanted to tell you earlier: guess what?"

"You can't decide who's arses are tighter? Mr. Lawrence's or Dumbeldore's?" Lily guessed, flagging down a waitress for a refill.

"Ha ha," James replied dryly, shuddering. "And just for that, I'm not going to let you guess and have the chance to be smarter than me! Swiggley's a Metamorphagus."

"What?"

"You heard me. Do I have to define it too?"

"Out of Hogwarts half a year and already losing her smarts," Sirius said sadly to Remus, shaking his head.

"Oh, shut it; I know what a Metamorphagus is," Lily growled irritably. "But how did you figure that out, James?"

"Didn't you notice how green his eyes were the other day? Or how his hair, which, was specifically bright orange and curly a few weeks ago, was straight and blonde at the Callbacks?"

Lily looked thoughtful as she doctored her refill with sugar and cream.

"No, I suppose I didn't... but that's probably because I was so nervous about the auditions; I wasn't really observant."

"Come off it," James moaned, pulling the casting parchment towards him.

"No really, -"

"Who's Javert, anyway?"

"I suppose a large role, since he's listed second to the top," said Remus.

"Then why in hell did Snape get it?" James asked, wrinkling his nose distastefully.

"Admit it James, he was pretty good during the callbacks," Lily said, prickled because of James' observation skills and her own failure.

James opened his mouth to protest, but Remus' arched eyebrow made it closed again.

"For a greasy wanker," James muttered, lifting his mug to his lips.

"James!" Lily reprimanded.

"OK, there's no denying he needs a bath," James said defensively.

"Even so-"

"Hey, my kid cousin made it," Sirius observed.

"Nymphadora?" Lily asked, craning her neck to see, "you mean your great kid cousin, don't you?"

"Well yeah, but I didn't know she auditioned."

"Well we didn't get to see the children's tryouts, did we?" Lily asked in a somewhat bossy voice that made James frown. Perhaps he'd preferred Nervous-Out-Of-Her-Wits Lily to original; after all, it'd lasted a good two weeks, and for once, he'd been in charge.

James had had a taste of the sort of freedom he hadn't experienced for two years and he had liked it.

James wanted it back.

"You'll need cyanide and a shovel," Sirius said suddenly, looking right at James.

James jumped as if he'd recieved an electric shock and gave Sirius a very questioning look.

Sirius shrugged; no one else had noticed. Peter was currently in the loo and Lily and Remus were having an animated chat on everything they'd heard of Les Miserables; it was, after all, a brand new musical.

"It was written by Victor Hugo during the French Revolution, in the days of Napoleon, did you know that?" Lily asked Remus excitedly.

"I'm not going to kill Lily, Sirius," James said in a low voice.
"I read it when I was younger. I know a lot about the characters, but of course, that would have changed when they wrote the musical, wouldn't it?" Remus replied to Lily.

"Just a suggestion," Sirius shrugged again.

"Not necessarily," Lily said to Remus. "In some aspects, perhaps, especially scenarios, but other than that, I doubt characters would change much."

"Besides, even if I did want to kill her, which I don't, wouldn't it be easier to use a certain curse?" James asked indifferently.

"I agree with that. The book is very long; I wonder how long the musical will be?" Remus said thoughtfully.

"One would think, but the use cyanide and officials would track the murder to a Muggle case, (what self-respecting wizard uses cyanide?) therefore making you an impossible suspect. And of course, if you disposed of the body with a shovel, officials may never have the chance to discover what killed her," Sirius said in a low, dry voice.

"You're sick. You're very, very sick," James said, standing.

He grabbed Lily by the arm and pulled her up with him.

"Get your cloak; we're leaving," he said to her.

Very taken aback by James' sudden behavior, Lily stumbled to the hooks and got her cloak, then waited by the door.

"You stay the hell away from her, got it?" James said in a very dangerous voice.

"What's wrong?" Remus asked, frowning.

"Whoa, how'd this suddenly get all suspenseful?" Sirius asked innocently.

"I... don't know." James said, going kind of limp in the shoulders.

"C'mon Prongs, I was just blowing some smoke up your ass. Lily's great; I don't want to kill her," Sirius said jovially.

"Kill who?" Remus asked, completely confused.

"I mean yes, she's a pesky thing sometimes, but murder is hardly the solution," Sirius continued.

"What? Murder?" Remus asked again, sitting up and glancing at Lily, who was still standing by the door, waiting.

"I mean," Sirius chuckled here, "it's not like I've got a bottle of cyanide and a shovel in the same closet where I keep my broomstick waiting at home for this specific reason."

"Cyanide? Who said anything about cyanide?" Remus asked nervously, looking from a calm, serene Sirius to an increasingly agitated James.

"Exactly," Sirius said.

"OK... I think this has gone on long enough," James said, grinning. "It's starting to creep even me out."

"Indubitably, old chum," Sirius agreed, standing too. "Not to mention it was a completely pointless exercise."

"What? So are we going to muder Lily or what?" Remus asked, standing.

When both James and Sirius glanced at Remus, he grinned too.

"What? You don' think I know how to play your sick game?" he demanded, tying his scarf.

"Hey guys, are we going or what?" Lily asked from the doorway.

The four left together, and five minutes later, a very confused Peter Pettigrew arrived back from the bathroom to four empty coffee mugs and a tab.

Chapter 5

"Our first rehearsal, I can't wait!" Lily exclaimed, clearing the dishes away from the table and depositing them into the sink. She waved her wand carelessly at it and the pots and plates began to wash themselves as she joined James by the fireplace.

"It's not an actual rehearsal; you know that, right?" James asked as she joined him and picked up Les Miserables the novel for the fiftieth time that day. She was reading it agian, and had resorted to magic in her usually Muggle-approached chores more than once that day.

"I know; it's a full cast meeting, but it's the first, and just think; we're going to be recognized for the parts we landed for the first time since we got them!"

"My, my, aren't you the cheerful power monster?" James asked jovially, poking Lily's side.

"Don't- I'm not a power monster, I'm just thrilled at the prospect of having such a good role; you know, I'd forgotten that Eponine dies in the book? Maybe she dies in the play too. I hope so. And being recognized isn't the only reason I'm excited. We get our scripts tonight too."

"Sure," James said, poking her again.

"Quit it-"

"What? This?" This time James grabbed her side and squeezed.

"James! Stop it!" Lily laughed, the shrill but real laugh she used whenever he tickled her.

"Or this?" James grabbed her other side and squeezed with both hands.

Lily kicked out and rolled over, in an attempt to excape, but James wrapped his arms around her front and pulled her closer, tickling her more mercilessly than before.

Lily was wriggling and laughing uncontrollably, trying desperately to pry James' hands away, but he held fast.

She rolled over onto her back in her agony, and tossed her head back.

"James, please-"

"Who's a power hungry monster?" James asked in a babyish voice.

"Please!"

"Who's a monster? Who's a monster? Whosamonsta?"

"M-"

"Sorry?" James tickled harder, laughing at her reaction.

"M-me! James, p-please!"

Tears were streaming down Lily's cheeks now; her sides hurt from laughing so much.

James suddenly stopped tickling, though his hands remained in their respective positions at her sides.

Lily cautiously took his hands; she was still afraid he'd start up again.

But James was now looking at her in a different kind of light.

Lily smiled, and wiped her tears of laughter off with one hand.

James caught that hand as it made to drop again, and the two held each other's eyes.

"Did you know, that in the book, Eponine's in love with Marius?" Lily asked quietly.

"Oh? And how does that end?" James asked, bringing his face closer to hers.

"Well I could tell you, but it would ruin the mood," Lily murmured, enjoying his breath on her cheek.

"Oh, well, in that case..." James said with a little grin.

"Marius falls for some chick named Cosette, and Eponine dies before she can tell him how she feels."

Lily rolled her eyes. James sat up suddenly. Sirius had arrived suddenly, and had apparently helped himself to a carton of pumpkin juice. He was now sipping on this carton, leaning casually against the doorframe of the living room.

All that was missing was a box of popcorn.

"And in this story, your Cosette is the lovely Narcissa Malfoy, who, by the way, is a cousin of mine, so if you get married, we'll be related, except she's already married to Lucius Malfoy, which would make for a very interesting marriage indeed."

Lily and James stared for moment, then James slowly backed off Lily and she sat up on the couch.

"I told you we should have changed the locks when he burst into the bathroom," Lily growled.

"I did," James growled back.

"How did you know about the love triangle?" Lily asked curiously, depsite herself.

Sirius shrugged. "Moony came over yesterday, determined to teach me everything about the damn story."

"Oh, that's what I should do with James," Lily said.

James groaned. "No... I'll pick it up as I go along."

"No... you won't have anything to base your character on!"

"He's a ladies' man!"

"No he isn't! He loves one girl. One! And Eponine loves him because she doesn't know any better!"

James frowned. "I like the term 'ladies' man'."

"Well, you're wrong. There's more to life than ridiculously good-looking people."

Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Sounds like you're having a difficult time convincing yourself."

Lily rolled her eyes before she launched herself off the couch and disappeared into the kitchen.

James watched after her, then turned to Sirius.

"We were having a nice conversation!" he snapped.

"More like a nice snog," Sirius scoffed, finishing his juice and making the carton disappear.

"Yeah, well it was obviously better than what you were doing before you had to come here and piss us off."

Sirius shrugged. "What can I say? Watching you trying to snog Lily in a way that makes her as happy as you are amuses me."

James' eyes narrowed. "It disturbs me that you find spying on my fiancee and I amusing."

Sirius shrugged again. "I know. I need a girl."