The Infinite Theatre

The Infinite Theater

Chapter One

A Community Project

"Honestly Padfoot, what did you expect? A large sign that read 'WELCOME STUD' and a line up of beautiful women waiting for you to sleep with them?" James Potter asked lazily, leaning on one elbow and sipping his coffee.

"No, but it would've been a start," Sirius Black replied moodily, taking another shot from the bottle of Cosmic! Vodka he'd persuaded the waitress to leave at the table. "Or at least a crowd of beautiful girls; they didn't have to be in a straight line or anything. And the sign didn't have to be large, either." He downed another shot and passed the bottle to Remus Lupin, who took it but did not drink.

"I'll pretend I'm not hearing this, and that we're having a pleasant, intelligent conversation about the many different types of medicinal herbs and fungi used for curing common maladies." He passed the bottle to Peter Pettigrew, who accepted it hastily and took a lage gulp that sent him coughing dryly.

"But surely, the party wasn't that bad, was it?" James asked, thumping Peter on the back. "I mean, the music was good and there was lots of food."

"Prongs, I know you're engaged, so I understand that the female body no longer holds any aspect of pleasure or excitement for you, but I'll still try to explain. Parties without girls, no matter how good the music or tasty the food, are shitty."

James gave Remus a bewildered look.

Remus rolled his eyes.

Sirius snatched the bottle of Cosmic! back from across the table and downed the rest.

"Ok, Padfoot, I get that you're upset, but just because I'm engaged does NOT mean that I'm... I'm gay or something! I still appreciate the 'female body' as much as the next guy. It's just that I'm-"

"No longer able to experience variety?"

"No-"

"Are so completely whipped by your fiancee that you consider turning gay just so that you won't risk even looking at another woman again, lest she deprives you of the already meager amount of sex you do get?"

James slammed his coffee mug down.

"I am NOT whipped," he said loudly.

Sirius chose to reply by executing a series of whiplashing sound effects and flicking his wrist, grinning mockingly.

With an enraged roar James reached across the table for Sirius' throat when the door to the Lion's Den burst open and Lily Evans entered, then looked around before hurrying down toward their corner table.

As if it were routine, Peter got up and slid on the other side of Remus so Lily could sit with James.

Her hair was tied in her usual braid and she impatiently brushed loose tendrils from her startlingly green eyes as she slid into booth beside James.

"Hey guys," she said heavily as she shrugged off her shoulder bag and cloak.

"Hullo Lily," Sirius, Remus and Peter chorused.

James touched her cheek with the back of his hand.

"You're ice cold," he said. "Didn't anyone tell you it's still winter?"

"It's early March, James," Lily argued. "It may not be mild yet, but when the warm winds come, I'll be ready for them." She finished this last part of the sentence with a determined air, smiling with anticipation.

Sirius, Remus and Peter exchanged sideways glances.

"Until then, do yourself a favour and wear a winter cloak?" James said, offering her some coffee.

"I may or may not have already put it into storage, and no thanks, I'll get my own," Lily said, looking around for a waitress.

After Lily had procured a cup of coffee and small talk ("how are you?" "Good, how about you?") had been brushed to the side, Sirius ordered another drink.

"I honestly don't know how you can drink at nine in the morning," Lily said with disgust, sipping her coffee, which had been doctored with sugar and cream until it was as sweet as a malt.

"It's like your coffee," Sirius shrugged. "It wakes me up in the morning."

Lily wrinkled her nose.

"And what about when your livers shrivel up and die inside of you? Then how will you wake up?"

"Well then I'll just drink more, because the liver problem will no longer be a problem!"

Lily rolled her eyes.

"You're so attractive when you do that, you know?" Sirius teased.

"But not as attractive as you when you're drunk off your arse and vomiting into my hedges," Lily shot back.

"It wasn't the drink, it was your Muggle meatloaf!" Sirius retorted.

"Ooh!" Remus and Peter chorused, looking to Lily for the next comeback.

"Oh! That reminds me!" Lily gasped, snatching up her bag and rummaging through it. "You know that old theatre, just up the road?" At the blank stares, she prodded "It was once used for Shakespeare but was closed down years ago? When the owner died?"

"How did you get that out of my zing towards your muggle meatloaf?" Sirius asked her incredulously.

Ignoring his remark, Lily continued.

"Well someone's bought it now and it's reopening! And, guess what they're doing for their first show?"

Lily found what she was looking for yanked a slightly crumpled piece of paper out of her bag and threw it onto the table.

She spread it open to reveal a black poster, with the words The Infinite Theater Proudly Presents: Les Miserables written across the center in flashing letters.

Beneath it read: Auditions begin on Sunday, March 21st.

Those requiring furthur information may come to the theatre at 12:00 sharp on Saturday, March 13. Don't be shy! Give your talent a try!

"Well?" Lily demanded, looking eagerly at all of them.

"Well what?" Sirius asked, shrugging and returning to his drink.

"Well, what do you think?" Lily looked to James, hoping for a positive opinion.

"It's very..."

"Infinite?" Remus tried, grinning.

"Very funny--seriously, guys! Do you think you'll audition?" Lily was eager, persistent. She looked like it was Christmas.

Sirius snorted into his glass, Peter mumbled something incoherent, and Remus bit his lip.

James, however blanched and blurted "are you nuts?"

Only then did Sirius look up, eager to see what would become of that remark.

Lily set her eyes on his. "What do you mean?"

James reddened a little. "Well come on Lily! Me? Sing?"

"It does sound rather far-fetched," Sirius said in a false, elitist voice.

"I happen to think you have a great voice," Lily said matter-of-factly.

"When have you heard me sing?" James asked incredulously.

"Oh, please! You sing all the time in the shower, and I'll have you know that it sounds wonderful."

Remus, Peter and Sirius all snickered, but Lily rounded on them.

"And you Remus! I know you can sing, because I've heard you at your place when you're washing your dishes." Remus went slightly red, and bent his head over his muffin.

"Peter is always humming, though I don't know about his singing," Peter grinned nervously, "but I'm sure Sirius can act because he's such a lying smart-arse!"

"Hey!" Sirius sputtered, his mouth full of vodka.

"Well I've heard that smart-arses make very good actors!" Lily replied casually. "But come on, guys, think of how much fun it would be!"

"And also of how much work!" Sirius said, mimicking Lily's excited tone.

"Why must you mock me?" Lily asked in a falsely hurt voice.

"Because it's so damn easy, Lily. Listen," Sirius said, taking on a slightly more serious tone (though the vodka was obviously getting to him because he sported a very frivolous grin). "I'm sure this thing will be lots of fun, and the outcome will be incredible, and I think I speak for everyone when I say we'll definitely be there to watch you on opening night."

Everyone else nodded, and Lily's face fell.

"Honestly, don't you ever get sick of being lazy and pessimistic? And don't you three ever tire of doing everything he says?"

"Nice try, Lily, but your reverse psychology doesn't work on us," Sirius replied. "Our minds are too powerful."

"I didn't-" Lily tried, then shook her head and stood. There was no arguing with an increasingly drunk Sirius Black.

"Look, I can't force you to give this a go, but you really, really should."

She picked up her bag and slung it on her shoulder, turning to leave.

"Where's she going?" James asked, watching her disappear out the door.

"So how about that play, eh?" Sirius said suddenly. "Fancy seeing what it's all about?"

Remus frowned. "But you just said-"

"The problem with you Moony, is that you focus too much on what's been said, and not enough on what should be done." When he said this, Sirius tried to point accusingly at his friend, but seemed unable to control where his finger pointed and nearly poked Peter in the eye instead.

"Watch it!" Peter cried, throwing his hands up to protect himself.

Sirius threw a few Sickles onto the counter and stood, reaching for his cloak.

"Well? What are you waiting for?" he demanded of his friends, standing before them looking ridiculously determined and mighty.

"Right," James muttered. "I s'pose we could give it a go. I mean, we could just go to the meeting. No one said we have to stay after that, right?"

Remus nodded slowly. "Alright then. I just hope they don't mind me missing a few rehearsals a month. Peter?"

Peter smiled nervously. "You know me," he said, "if you guys are in, I'm in."

"Good on ya!" Sirius said loudly, clapping him on the back and tying his cloak on. "Now all we have to do is worry about that shady-looking redhead," he added, shifting his eyes suspiciously.

"You mean Lily?" James asked, clasping his own cloak around his neck.

"Yeah... 'Lily,'" Sirius said, wavering slightly on the spot.

"I think that before we do anything, we'd better get a Madam Helga's Hangover Cure," Remus muttered to James. "Maybe Lily was right about drinking in the morning."

"Or in Sirius' case, drinking in particular," Peter quipped, eyeing Sirius, who was now filling his pockets heavily with the complimentary mints provided by the cafe. He also seemed to be carrying on a one-way conversation with the cloak rack.

"I'll take as many as I want- I'm a paying consumer!"

"D'you reckon he'll remember deciding to do the play once he's sober?" Remus asked James lightly as they each took Sirius under an arm and led him out the door.

"Are you kidding? He'll probably be drunk during the audition, rehearsals and every single performance," James replied, pushing open the cafe's door.

Chapter Two

For Those Interested

Once James, Peter and Remus restored Sirius they sauntered casually by the Infinite Theatre and found it had also been restored. The box office was gleaming, there were red carpets inside the brass doors and the marquee was flashing coming events in gold lettering.

"Fancy schmansy," Sirius remarked offhandedly, swaggering up to the window and peering inside.

"Look, here's the poster," Remus said, appearing beside him and pointing to a poster hanging on the other side of the glass.

"Well it's the thirteenth next week," James observed, checking his watch, which displayed not only the time but the days of the week as well (he had had a wonderful time showing this to Lily, until she had informed him that the Muggle world had watches like that too). "Fancy we should make an appearance?"

"I suppose so," Remus replied. He sounded lightly amused by the prospect.

"Well, well, well," a sneering voice said, causing them all to turn around. Lily stood behind them, her hands tucked in the pockets of her muggle spring jacket and a smug smile pasted on her lips. (A/N: I bet you thought it was Malfoy!") "What on earth would four 'high and mighty' Gryffindor graduates be doing at the entrance of the Infinite Theater, staring at a promotional poster, no less, especially when they're obviously too 'cool' to show any kind of interest?"

The three Gryffindor graduates stared, confused, at Lily until she sighed and stepped forward.

"Sudden change of heart?" she asked, somewhat hopefully.

The three immediately shrugged and looked uninterested.

Lily laughed.

"Oh come off it! You obviously aren't here because you're on your way by!"

"How do you know that?" Sirius challenged.

"Because this is at the end of the street and the only building after it is the Library!" Lily retorted.

A second's pause, then-

"We're on our way there-"

"For Remus-"

"He likes books-"

"They're good for... reading."

Now it was Lily's turn to stare.

"Right... So are you planning on showing up tomorrow?"

"Well I thought-"

"Seems like an okay idea-"

"They made me do it-"

"It's good for... acting."

Lily grinned suddenly and beckoned them to follow her.

"Lovely. But it's freezing out here. Why don't we go to the house?"

"Sounds good-"

"Will there be whisky-"

"I guess so-"

"It'll be good for... warmth."

Lily slipped her arm in James' and the five headed back towards town.

***
"Remind me again why I'm not wearing my blue robes?" James grumbled, buttoning up a set of dark ones as Lily curled her hair beside him.

"Because they've got holes in the elbows and the only reason you still have them is because you won't let me throw them out!" Lily replied jerkily, fluffing her hair with one hand.

"You can't throw out my things. They're my things!"

"As you're wife-to be, I retain full possession of anything that was, is or is going to be yours."

"You know, why bother with a wedding at all? You two are already so officially married," Sirius piped up from behind them, his reflection in the mirror revealing him lying spread out on their large four poster, munching messily on a pumpkin pasty.

"Sirius, what have I told you about coming in our room and eating on our bed?" Lily spun around irritably.

"Only do it if you're lying naked beside me? Ouch! Prongs, uncalled for!"

James had punched his shoulder. A brief wrestling match ensued.

"Come on you two, we've got to get going," Lily said, tearing herslf away from her reflection and heading for the door.

"Reckon this is where our tax Galleons have gone?" Remus muttered to Sirius as they entered a very plush, fancy theatre. He too had taken Lily's warning to dress nicely to heart, and had borrowed a pair of James' robes, though they were a little too baggy on his thin, sickly frame.

"Hey! Maybe!" Sirius said, as if having a revelation. "That's good money I could have spent on firewhisky. What a terrible loss. Hey! Plush velvet!"

He threw himself onto one of the deep red seats in the theatre and rubbed it appreciatively.

"Touch it, Moony! It's like my arse after a bubble bath!"

"Way more information than I needed to know," Lily quipped meekly, moving one seat over to keep a distance.

"Ditto," James said, settling between them and draping an arm around Lily's shoulders.

"I third that," Remus added, noticeably removing his hand from the armrest he shared with his friend.

"What kind of bubbles?" Peter asked absent-mindedly, presently occupied in rubbing the seats himself.

He looked up as all four of his friends leaned forward to stare at him with looks of curious disgust.

"What?"

Lily diverted her attention from the strange wizard and focused on her surroundings.

The theatre was very large, complete with balcony, and though it was lit with house lights, it still managed to remain looking classic and romantic.

The theatre was nearly full to the brim with prospective actors. There were some she knew, and some she didn't, but Lily smiled when her eyes fell upon those who had familiar faces.

Arthur and Molly Weasley were two for example, as well as their son, who Lily had not yet met.

A few rows behind them she spotted a few members of the Prophet, as well as a few rows over she recognized teachers from Hogwarts, including-

"Look James, McGonagall!" she nudged James excitedly.

James scanned the throng of people and-

"And Hagrid!" he said very loudly, though it wasn't heard far over the constant chatter that filled the theatre.

All five craned their necks and looked to the back, where sure enough, Rubeus Hagrid stood near the back in his tatty overcoat and shaggy beard, looking both excited and terrified.

"What the hell-" Sirius burst out suddenly, sitting up straighter. "What's that wanker doing here?"

Lily soon found he was referring to a couple sitting in one of the private balconies, looking much too smug to encourage any mingling.

It was Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy.

"They must want a part in the play," Peter offered.

"No, I thought they were just here for the matinee!" Sirius replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Hold on," James said, hitting Sirius' shoulder. "Speaking of wankers..."

Sirius whirled around to see Severus Snape sitting discreetly behind them a few rows away, staring at the floor.

"Merlin, I don't know about this Lil," Sirius said, shifting irritably. "Seems it's turning out to be a pretty shady cast of characters."

"Oh, don't be silly Sirius," Lily assured him, "there's nothing saying that they're going to make it in. They're probably just here for show."

"Oh yeah? What's Snivellus here for?" James challenged.

Lily shrugged. "Maybe he's talented."

Suddenly, the theatre began to quiet and the five turned to face the stage.

And Sirius let out a mad bark of laughter.

Lily shrank in her seat.

James stuffed a couple of knuckles in his mouth to keep from laughing.

Remus closed his eyes and shuddered.

Peter followed suit with Remus, not quite sure what to make of it.

"Attention, your attention please ladies and gentlemen!"

The director had climbed up on stage.

"That must be Lawrence Swiggley," she whispered restrainingly to James.

He was still shaking with suppressed laughter.

"Oh, don't James. He's a very dedicated man!"

James shook harder.

Lily focused back onto Swiggley.

He does have a point, she thought with an inward giggle.

Lawrence Swiggley, though academically very impressionable upon Lily, was not as one would imagine him to look like.

He was dressed very flamboyantly in what appeared to be large, puffy purple parachute pants. He wore a gold waistcoat with a bright green cravat, and sported a pair of shiny yellow boots.

Over top of this ridiculous outfit, a rich green-blue cloak was draped over his shoulders, tied under his chin with a large silky ribbon. Perched jauntily on top of his head was a ruby red hat, decorated with silver stars.

He was an amiable man, with a large toothy smile and very noticeable blue eyes that twinkled. He had a head full of very orange curls, and a rather large, bulbous-like nose.

"Ah, that's better," Lawrence Swiggley said, smilng broadly, clasping his hands happily behind his back and rocking jovially on his heels.

"Firstly, I would like to express my deepest pleasure that we have had such an incredible turn out! Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that there would be so many passionate members of the Wizarding community!

"Secondly, I feel obliged to address those of you who do not know exactly why you are here. It is to partake in what may possibly be the most incredible dramatic production in the history of the Wizarding world since the Shakespeare that was performed hundreds of years ago in this very theatre.

"Les Miserables, the story of criminally reprieved Jean Valjean, being pursued by the merciless and determined policeman Javert. Desperate Fantine, willing to do anything for her daughter. Hard as nails Gavroche, abandoned and raised on the street. Lonely and impoverished Eponine, pining for a love that cannot be; for the passionate Marius who loves the innocent Cosette, two lovers from first sight tested by fate. Courageous Enjolras and his band of students, fighting for the rights of the People. And of course, the treacherous Thenardiers, who provide the comic relief for the miserable.

"All this and a cast of beggers, prostitutes and soldiers make up the incredible production of love, trust and the wonders of forgiveness. It is a truly remarkable play, where no one is unimportant. Where everyone counts. When there is equality among the people."

"Is he repeating himself?" Sirius muttered to James, who snorted.

Lily, however, and Remus as well, were in awe.

"Doesn't it sound incredible?" she breathed in James' ear.

Swiggley straightened himself a little more, and grinned broadly at the audience before him over his rather large build.

"Once again, I am thrilled with the turn out. However, there are so many of you all that I'm afraid we'll have to separate audition times.

"Auditions will take place as they are posted, Sunday, March 21st, followed by another on the next Saturday, the 27th. My casting crew and I ask that ladies auditioning arrive at the designated time that will be given, which will be in the morning. Any gentlemen wishing to audition will then be slotted time in the afternoon. There is a stack of forms in the lobby, and I will ask you to fill them out with information anbout your background, leaving your name and address here for us. You will be owled before the end of the week, giving your audition time. Please remember to bring your information forms when you arrive at the audition. The 27th will be used for callbacks, in which we will be selecting the few for the parts as leads, and solo lines. Rest assured, however, that just becuse you have not been called back, it doesn't mean that you are not in the play.

"Also," he said, to which Sirius groaned, "I will be giving you the music sheets of the song you are to audition for. I encourage you that because we do not have time for acting auditions, to give your very best while singing."

There was silence in the theatre, and then-

"Any questions?" he asked, peering into the assembled.

Silence.

Suddenly, Sirius spoke up.

"Where do you buy your outifts?"

There was a bit of scattered laughter, mostly coming from the four men in the front row and Swiggley himself.

"Madam Malkin's special edition catalogue. I suggest you take a look, good sir. They have wonderful slacks."

Sirius raised an eyebrow.

Lily cast him a warning glance and raised her own hand.

"Who makes up the casting crew?" she asked politely.

"Ah, I've been waiting for that one," he said delightedly. "May I introduce the casting and stage crew of Les Miserables: Madam Rosmerta," to this, a smiling woman came out on stage in glittering heels. Polite applause ensued.

"Lance Perkins," a man in his late sixties entered after Rosmerta and took a place beside her. Again with the applause.

"Bertha Jorkins," a pretty though robust blonde woman came onstage, smiling winningly.

"And last, but certainly not least, Albus Dumbledore!"

There was a collective gasp from the audience, followed by tumultuous clapping.

Dumbledore came onstage, smiling warmly and took his place humbly by the side of Bertha Jorkins.

"These dedicated and generous individuals are the ones who will be helping to make this show a success. Let's have another round of applause for them!"

The audience applauded obediently.

"Now, if there are not any more questions," Swiggley said in conclusion, "thank-you again for coming, please pick out a form on your way out of the door! See you all next week."

The crowd broke and the theatre became full of departing chatter. Those on the stage exited though the curtains.

The five fought their way to the lobby in relative silence (if you counted Sirius breaking out into song composed of his own tune and just mixing up the information Swiggley had given as lyrics silence).

Grabbing the forms, they spilled out onto the street with the rest of the crowd, being jostled this way and that.

Suddenly, a gust of wind hit them all and some of the forms were blown from the hands of anonymous individuals. Peter included.

"Hey! My form!" he gasped, chasing after it.

It was blown onto the entrance carpet. Peter dove after it, placing his hand on top of the slip just as a dragon skin boot stomped on it as well.

"Ouch!" Peter yelped, trying to wrench his hand away, but the boot stayed firm.

Peter looked up and saw with a quiver that it belonged to Lucius Malfoy.

James, Remus and Sirius charged forward to the side of their friend.

"Excuse me, Mister Malfoy, but um, you're standing on my hand," Peter squeaked.

Lucius smirked, but glanced up in time to see James, Remus and Sirius arrive.

"Of course," he said, lifting his foot smarmily and stepping back. "My apologies, Pettigrew. I did not see you er, down there on the ground."

Peter grabbed his form and scrambled up to his friends.

"I'm surprised you're even here at all," James shot, feigning an upper-class accent, "coming to the community theatre like a middle class wizard? What will become of you, Lucius?"

Lucius sneered, curling his lip.

"My business here is no business of yours, Potter. Besides, I was about to ask you the same question. I imagine you're here for your fiancee? Ah well, it is good to be supportive. Even one as untalented on the stage as you."

No reaction, then, Lucius added causally, with a malicious glance at Lily, who was hanging behind, in excited conversation with a neighbor.

"I was just on my way to speak to the director about allowing her kind to participate in a Wizarding theatre production. After all, we want to retain a clean reputation for the Reopening. We don't want any disgusting Mudbloods mucking it up."

James lunged forward, but with the combined efforts of Remus and Sirius he was held back.

"You're wrong Malfoy," he snarled. "It's dark wizards like you that give our world a bad name."

Lucius only smirked.

"I am one of the benefactors aiding and supporting this, Potter, as you well know. You may want to be a little more genial in future."

Lucius held out his arm and was joined by Narcissa, who sneered at the four. They then edged away from the crowd and Apparated.

Only then did Remus and Sirius let go of James, who stumbled forward, panting angrily.

"Bloody wanker!" he spat, straightening up and looking round for Lily.

"Don't listen to him Prongs," Remus advised. "There is no way that Malfoy can persuade Lawrence Swiggley to disclude Muggle-borns.

"How can you be so sure?" James asked, his eyes still fixed worriedly on Lily. If Lucius had been right about anything, it was his reason for being here. It was all about Lily, and her excitement had been the reason he'd wanted to come. If she was suddenly not allowed to participate...

"Because his mother was a Muggle-born."

"How do you know that?" Sirius asked curiously.

Remus shrugged. "You may not have made the connection because he was a Hufflepuff, but Lawrence Swiggley was Head Boy our first year at Hogwarts."

"So what, did you have tea parties with him or something?" Sirius prodded, wanting the answer to his question. Ususally Remus put his short attention span into account when answering questions.

"Of course not," Remus snorted with a dismissive glare at his friend, "he tutored me for a time when I was missing so much class. I usually did all right for most, but that didn't stop me from needing remedial potions."

"Certainly this information will not be useful in the future. That answer was a large waste of any time I could have spent thinking about soup!" Sirius muttered to Peter, who giggled nervously, not knowing what to make of that.

***

"Lily?"

"Mmm?"

"Is uh, something wrong?"

"Why would you say that?"

"Because usually when we snog you don't call me Mr. Swiggley."

Lily sat up and rested her elbow on the back of the sofa.

"I'm sorry," she apologized, running a hand through her hair, "I guess I'm just really nervous about tomorrow; I keep thinking about the casting crew."

James shrugged and sat up too. "All right, I understand. But, did you have to use the name Mr. Swiggley? I mean, I'd prefer to be called Dumbledore over Mr. Swiggley. At least Dumbledore has those sexy eyes."

Lily raised an eyebrow.

"Well come on Lily, whose eyes are that blue?" James demanded defensively.

Lily shook her head and straightened her robes.

"If I wasn't absolutely sure you weren't gay... oh that reminds me; Sirius is coming for dinner and audition rehearsal tonight, do you want to help me in the kitchen?"

Now it was James' turn to raise an eyebrow.

"Why does the word 'gay' remind you of Sirius?"

Before Lily could reply, another voice issued from the doorway.

"Because we have a pact that if you do take the road less travelled someday, I'm her back-up hubby," Sirius said.

He was leaning againt the doorway of the living room, a brown shopping bag in one hand.

"How long have you been standing there?" Lily asked, standing.

She damned the day she had let James give that man a spare key.

"Let's just say James let it slide three times before asking you about Mr. Swiggley," Sirius replied, entering the living room and handing Lily the bag.

"I brought the cakes."

"Ooh, thanks you stinking pervert," Lily said snatching the bag and exiting to the kitchen.

"Hey, it's nothing I haven't seen before!" Sirius retorted into the next room.

"All right, Prongs?" he asked, sinking down onto the couch beside James.

James shrugged and adjusted his glasses.

"I s'pose. She's really wrapped up in the auditions tomorrow. She keeps singing the song they owled her and is always on my back to do the same."

Sirius laughed. "Let me guess, mate: she sold you a snog for a song?"

At James' emotionless face, Sirius doubled over, clapping his hands.

"Bravo!" he gasped, sitting up. "She sure does know how to handle you!"

James rolled his eyes. "Well apparently it's Mr. Swiggley who's getting all the action."

Sirius fixed James with a malicious smirk. "Oh come on! I think it's kinky! I mean, that guy is pretty yummy, especially for a lonely girl like Li-"

James didn't even wait for Sirius to finish his sentence before throwing himself onto his best friend and giving him the flogging of a lifetime.

"Ouch! Ok! Ok, I give," Sirius gasped, shoving James off and rolling over. Then, with another sideways glance, he added, "I guess you're pretty lonely too, eh Big Boy?"

Another thrashing, this time not ending until Lily called them for dinner.

Afterwards, they sat and watched Lily rehearse. She begged the boys to try, but they both replied "not without a snog," (which resulted in another beating on Sirius' part).

And so over the faux pas screams of agony Lily sang, trying desperately to sound like the beautiful voices she heard from the singing Sowl she'd recieved a day before.

Afterward she collapsed beside James on the sofa.

"How was it?"

"Lovely," James replied.

"Inspiring," Sirius contributed.

"No it wasn't it was awful!" Lily cried, jumping up again and reaching for the dark blue envelope.

"I'm trying it again."

"Oh, come on Lily!" James said, standing up and making his way to the cabinet in the corner, "you've sung the song at least fifty times already!"

He opened the cupboard and pulled out two bottles of butter beer and a flask of firewhisky.

"It needs to be perfect, James!" Lily stressed. "Did you see how many people were there?"

"True, but Lily, it's better to leave it at that than lose your voice completely, right?" Sirius said helpfully.

"I s'pose you're right," Lily said slowly, accepting the butterbeer and putting away the envelope.

"Bloody genius," James muttered sideways to Sirius.

"What the hell d'you think I'm here for?" Sirius replied, taking a long swig of firewhisky.

***

"I can't do this James," Lily said suddenly, clutching James' arm, a definite note of panic in her voice.

"Wha? What do you mean you can't?" James asked, bewildered. They were on their way out the door, cloaks on, bags around their shoulders, forms and time tickets in hand.

"I- I don't know. I just can't." Lily was staring at the door as if it wanted to swallow her up.

"Lily, love, we're about to go out the door," James said carefully, not wanting a Lily attack in his front foyer.

"I know that, don't you think I know that?" Lily dug her fingers into his arm and cast him a terrified look.

***

"Merlin's balls, this is like N.E.W.T.s all fucking over again!" Sirius said loudly, following a dutiful Remus up the Potter's front walk.

"Don't remind her of that when we get in there," Remus warned, not looking back.

"Why does she have to get so riled up over these things?" Sirius asked incredulously. "It just ruins it for the rest of us!"

"Well not everyone has a complete disregard for responsibility, Padfoot," Remus reminded him, stopping to knock on the door.

"What responsibility is there in singing a song? Don't knock, you dolt; just go in."

Remus shrugged and opened the door, revealing a very harried James who seemed to have been on his way to let them in.

"Thank Merlin you're here, Remus," James said breathlessly.

"You insult me," Sirius said, feigning a scandalized look. James ignored him.

"Where is she?" Remus asked anxiously.

James pointed to the living room, where Lily was curled up on the couch, head in her lap.

"She's not crying, is she?" Sirius asked, edging behind Remus. "Because I don't think I can handle crying."

"You're not here to handle anything Padfoot," James said. "If anything, you'll make her more upset."

"Then why am I here?" Sirius demanded as Remus entered the living room.

"For the food," James said, leading him to the kitchen and leaving Remus to work his magic.

"Hi Remus," Lily said, looking up and appearing very pale.

"Hey Lily," Remus said, sitting beside her. "So, ready for auditions?"

Lily rolled her eyes and returned her head to her lap.

"I'll take that as a no," Remus said, trying to sound bemused.

"It's not that," Lily protested, "it's just that I want a certain character and I'm so scared that i won't get it; I've never lost anything in my whole life, but I've never done anything like this before either!"

Remus smiled in the way that he did whenever Lily was upset, and patted her shoulder.

"Lily, you're one of the most prestigious people I've ever met when it comes to succeeding. I have total faith that you'll accomplish what you're setting out to do. And hell, even if you do get a different part I know you'd excel in making it the best part you've ever played."

"Plus, don't sweat it if you fail. There's a first time for everything."

"Sirius!" Both Remus and Lil whirled around to find Sirius standing over them, eating a chocolate frog.

"I'm sorry!" James said, hurrying into the room. "He said he wanted some milk and when i turned around he was gone!"

"It's okat," Lily said, standing, "because I'm not going."

"WHAT?" James, Sirius and Remus stood before her, gaping. This was the girl who had practically forced them into joining, except Sirius, who had been drunk when he'd decided to join. Still, the effect was similar.

"I'm not risking losing faith in myself by not succeeding. I'm just going to avoid the whole thing."

"Lily, do you realize what you're saying?" James asked weakly, grabbing his hair with a frustrated hand.

"Of course I do. Now you guys go along to your auditions, and I'll have lunch ready when you get back."

"What's for lunch?" Sirius asked.

"Meatloaf, why?"

***

"Sirius, untie me right now!!!" Lily screamed as they approached the theatre. Sirius had not waited a moment after hearing the lunch menu (he hated Muggle meatloaf) before hexing her with a binding curse and dragging her forcefully across town.

"Silencio" Sirius said, flicking his wand at her. "Save your voice for the audition, Lily," he said, grinning.

They entered the theatre, and it wasn't until after Remus had made Lily promise to settle down did Sirius remove the spells.

"You are in so much trouble," Lily said to James. "I'm serious-"

"No, I'm Sirius!"

"-this means no sex for a week!"

Both Remus and Sirius shuddered simultaneously, causing Lily to glare at them both.

"Well Lily, you're here, so you might as well accept the fact that you're doing the audition. Get over it."

James was pissed because she had been so difficult, and so very selfish. It was so unlike Lily, and he had gotten her through N.E.W.T.s in seventh year; he would know.

Lily, unaccustomed to James speaking to her like that, quieted down.

Sirius' name was called (men were being called for auditions first) and he swaggered confidently through the silvery veil leading to the audition room.

Remus was next of the five of them (Peter arrived just before he was called, mumbling an excuse about his mother making him dress smartly) and Peter came next.

Soon, after, Peter Pettigrew, Tyler Plum and Kirk Potick came James Potter.

"That didn't go too badly," James said, returning.

"Good," Lily said, genuinely pleased that he felt so confident about it.

Slowly they worked through the Q's, R's, S's etc, and finally, at Zach Zair, the men were done.

Then the women started. There were far more women than men, and this gave Lily a long time to collect herself.

Did she? Of course not.

"Lil, settle down!" Sirius said, coming back from a trip to the Lion's Den with five large coffees.

"I can't settle down!" Lily said, gulping her coffee at lightening speed.

"I'll take that," James said, gently prying her fingers from her cup. "The last thing you need is to be any more wired than you already are."

The P's began shortly after the coffee.

"Amber Ear."

Five minutes went by.

"Mary-Ann Errin."

Five minutes later.

"Charlene Esick."

Lily felt her throat tighten. It was the shortest fifteen minutes of her life as the voice announced again,

"Lily Evans."

"Good luck in there," James said, kissing her cheek.

Lily hardly felt it. Remus patted her back and Sirius issued a loud catcall that may or may not have earned him a punch from James, but Lily honestly didn't register much.

She walked through the doors and into a small black room. There was a large mirror on one wall and Lily turned away immediately, knowing that the panel of judges were on the other side. She was strongly reminded of the police detective shows her parents used to watch and how interrogation rooms looked very much like this one.

Suddenly, a voice came loudly into the room.

"Good afternoon, Ms Evans. Can you turn and face the mirror and you can begin whenever you're ready."

Lily swallowed and turned to face the mirror.

She took one deep breath, then another. Then, from the diaphragm, like her mother had told her...
"Do you hear the people sing?"