Lily's Charm

NotEvenHere

Story Summary:
In a story that spans two decades, Lily and Severus attempt to dispel the power of the Dark Mark after her life is threatened by Eileen Prince. Seventeen years later, Harry uncovers a long-buried truth which changes the course of his life. AU. Complete.

Chapter 25 - Tentative

Posted:
07/20/2008
Hits:
1,468


1996

Severus was less than pleased as his bedroom door creaked open. He opened only one eye, keeping his head firmly where it rested on the headboard, wishing he hadn't moved quite so sharply earlier. The door continued to open slowly. Lupin's concerned face peered around the edge.

Lupin's features dissolved into a ridiculously sappy smile and with a muffled sigh, Severus brought his head up and opened his other eye. As much as he did not want to be disturbed right now, he was certain he owed a great deal to the werewolf.

"Lupin," he greeted, keeping his voice low so he wouldn't disturb Harry, who was still leaning into Severus' side.

"Severus," Lupin returned, still smiling, "it's good to see you well again."

Severus inclined his head, resisting the urge to demand the reason for the intrusion, but Lupin spoke up almost immediately anyway. "Poppy asked me to give these to you," he explained, holding out two vials. Severus nodded and Lupin set the vials on the night table. "She says you're to take both of them within the next hour," he added and Severus nodded again. Lupin gazed at him for a minute as though trying to decide whether or not to say whatever was on his mind.

Stifling his annoyance, and thinking of the boy sleeping in the crook of his arm, Severus said quietly, "I assume you've been here the entire time."

Lupin didn't even look surprised at Severus' inference. He nodded. "We didn't think it wise to leave Harry alone."

Although Severus had already surmised that would have been the case, Lupin's words still made him tense. "Poppy said he hasn't been eating or sleeping." Without meaning to, Severus was asking Lupin for a confirmation.

Lupin sighed and although not invited to do so, he sank into Severus' desk chair. Severus raised an eyebrow at his presumption but didn't comment as Lupin clearly felt Severus needed to understand how his son had been affected by the events of this past week. And Severus wanted to understand; he needed to know how best to approach Harry's recovery.

"Severus, he thought you were dead," Lupin said with a weary sigh. And again, the words wrenched Severus. He looked down at his son, sleeping so contentedly and he silently swore revenge on Voldemort. "He was convinced of it, even when we tried to tell him otherwise," Lupin stressed and Severus looked up at him again in surprise.

"Perhaps I prepared him too well for the possibility." He frowned but Lupin was shaking his head.

"Severus," he said intently as he leaned forward in his chair, "Harry saw you being tortured by Voldemort."

A tremor convulsed through Severus and before he could stop himself, he realized he had dug his fingers into Harry's arm. He froze as Harry stirred, but the boy didn't wake; Severus carefully pulled his fingers away from his son's delicate skin. Closing his eyes to focus himself, he calmed his raging flames before opening his eyes once more. Lupin was watching him with concern.

"Are you certain?" Severus asked calmly, though his mind was churning with what this might mean for Harry's mental health in the upcoming weeks.

Lupin nodded, looking grief-stricken. "He became violent when I tried to tell him you were alive. He said he saw Lucius chanting Avada Kedavra...before that he was virtually comatose. He wouldn't respond to anything or anyone."

Severus let his eyes slide closed again as his head thumped softly against the headboard. Damn Voldemort! Severus knew immediately that those particular visions must have been courtesy of the bastard. Lupin started speaking again and though Severus took in every word, he couldn't open his eyes.

"He tried to act normally once he found out, but I'm fairly certain he was ignoring all of his emotions. He was almost like a zombie, simply going through the motions," Lupin told him. Severus sighed and opened his eyes despite his intentions and gazed down at his son again.

Well, at least both of the mini-breakdowns Harry had had in the past few hours made more sense. And Severus was certain it wouldn't be the last over the course of the next few weeks...not if Harry had buried every trace of emotion he'd had for a week now. That combined with lack of sleep and food... Training his exasperation away from the helpless child in his arms, Severus glared at Lupin.

"Perhaps if you would have fed him, he might have fared a bit better," he snapped. He realized his tone was harsh and accusatory but he did not try to modify it, feeling very real irritation that his son hadn't been better taken care of. "I believe you agreed to care for Harry when I could not. This is your idea of taking care of him? Nutritive Potions?" he sneered.

Lupin was staring at him with an air of incredulity. "I tried to get him to eat!" he exclaimed quietly, eyes flicking to Harry.

"You must not have tried very hard," Severus growled, hard pressed to continue in his low tones.

Lupin gaped at him. "As I'm sure you've noticed, Severus, your son is extremely stubborn!"

'Why did you not simply order him to eat then?" Severus demanded quietly.

Lupin threw up his hands, overly agitated. "I did! He refused, over and over again. He finally started agreeing to eat whatever I'd bring him but I know it was simply to appease me. I don't think he ate much of it, if anything at all." He shook his head. "I don't even think he realized he wasn't eating. Frankly, Severus, I don't know how you're going to do much better. I can't imagine he'll be ready to get back to normal so soon."

Severus set his jaw. "He will eat," he said in a hard tone, tightening his arm around his son. Because this was an issue Severus was willing to argue about.

"He probably will," Lupin agreed after a moment, smiling and shaking his head again, as though he was amazed by the idea. "You do seem to have a way with him," he said lightly.

Severus narrowed his eyes, attempting to determine if the assertion was meant as a slur, but he decided that it was most likely against Lupin's moral code to insult a man who had just woken from the dead.

"I don't think he's going to be willing to leave your side anytime soon," Lupin said abruptly, looking pointedly at Harry. Severus ran his hand unconsciously over Harry's hair.

"I have no intention of making him leave," he said, more sharply than he meant to. Lupin was predictably unperturbed by his tone.

"Of course not," he agreed, with a little nod, settling himself more comfortably against the chair. Severus raised an eyebrow, wondering just how long Lupin intended to stay; he looked as though he was readying himself for an annoyingly long chat. "Albus is anxious to speak with you...did you know?"

Lupin's voice was almost exaggeratedly carefree and Severus had the distinct impression that Lupin was in fact doing exactly what Harry had earlier. But of course, the werewolf could only be thinking about Harry if he was indeed attempting to reassure himself that Severus was all right. And yet, he felt unsettled by Lupin's concern.

"That is indeed shocking news," Severus drawled, not bothering to keep the sarcasm at bay as he attempted to ignore the waves of unease tripping through him. Lupin smiled again, making Severus wish he could just order the werewolf to get out. It was only the sound of Harry's contented breathing that stopped him from doing just that.

"He wants to discuss Lucius," Lupin explained. "He activated your Portkey. Lucius begged Voldemort to let him be the one to deliver the Killing Curse just so he could." Lupin seemed to be watching Severus carefully but Severus did not react outwardly. He had already surmised as much.

Severus asked calmly, "Is Lucius still alive?"

Lupin nodded, seeming unsurprised by the question. "Voldemort apparently did not suspect Lucius...foolish," he mused. "Several of your Slytherins have been expelled though."

Severus' eyebrows lifted in surprise. "Nott?" he deduced swiftly. Lupin nodded.

"They captured Nott Sr. in Hogsmeade and questioned him under Veritaserum. Gregory Goyle and Vincent Crabbe have been removed as well, along with three more seventh years who had already taken the Mark. All of them admitted to plotting to aid in removing Harry from Hogwarts."

Severus was heartened by the news. Harry would be infinitely safer now. And he couldn't deny that he felt a rather vindictive pleasure that the two men who had spearheaded his vicious assault would suffer now.

"Excellent," he approved.

"Albus still has no idea how Voldemort found out, though," Lupin said, eyeing Severus as though expecting to be enlightened. Severus considered not answering, but he knew that no matter that their friendship still bothered him, Lupin would not do anything to hurt Harry.

"I told Harry that my shields slipped."

Lupin studied him closely for a moment, before nodding once.

Grateful that Lupin understood, Severus said, "I presume our relationship has been publicized already."

With a grimace, Lupin reached into his robes and handed over a folded copy of the Daily Prophet. Scowling, Severus read Rita Skeeter's article through quickly and then with a muffled growl, he flipped it toward the end of the bed. "She should be strangled," he decided seriously.

Lupin nodded his agreement, smiling slightly. "Are you going to let Harry read it?" he asked quietly.

Severus leaned against the headboard once more; he felt completely drained. Of course he would have liked to shield Harry from the unpleasantness the following weeks were going to bring, but he knew Harry well enough that he understood his son would not appreciate being coddled.

"You need to sleep, Severus," Lupin said abruptly. "Will you let Harry know I came by?" Lupin's voice had thinned with ill-concealed emotion, making Severus extremely uncomfortable.

"I will," Severus agreed. Looking away, he said gruffly, "Thank you for taking care of Harry." He hoped Lupin would not find it necessary to reply.

"We were all relieved Harry was able to bring you back," Lupin said quietly.

"I'm sure Harry appreciates your concern for my welfare," he acknowledged stiffly, his eyes still trained on the heavy door.

Lupin gazed at him for a minute. "It is not only for Harry that we were concerned," he murmured softly. Severus clenched his jaw with this confirmation of his earlier suspicions. He didn't answer and after another minute, Lupin smiled a small smile. "I will stop by later in the day, if you don't mind." Severus nodded stiffly and Lupin, still smiling, turned and left the room, closing the door softly behind him.

Severus stared at the closed door, wishing he could Obliviate that conversation from Lupin's memory, as well as from his own.

--

Harry made a small groaning sound as he pulled himself back into the realm of consciousness. He felt a moment of disorientation as he sifted through the past night's events. Not really meaning to, he resettled himself against his father and then as he realized he had obviously fallen asleep like this, his cheeks warmed and he felt a panicked urge to jump up and leap over the edge of the bed.

"Good morning," Severus' deep voice rumbled before Harry could follow through. He stilled. He glanced up, feeling the heat creep up his neck again. But his father didn't seem bothered that Harry was curled up next to him like a little kid. And truth be told, there was a part of Harry that felt contented leaning into his father's side.

"Morning," he finally answered. "How do you feel?"

"I am well," Severus answered as he handed Harry's glasses over.

"Thanks," Harry murmured as he put them on. He pulled up a bit from his father's side and looked him over critically before asking, "Did you sleep?" Severus looked mildly amused by Harry's question.

"I did," he answered. Harry nodded, feeling relieved.

"Have you taken any potions yet?" he inquired immediately, remembering Pomfrey had said that he would still need to take something to help him to get stronger.

"Yes. Lupin brought them to me," Severus told him and Harry nodded once again.

"Good," he approved, satisfied that his father really was okay. Severus gazed down at him, still looking amused.

"Have you any other questions?" he asked, his mouth almost smiling again. Harry smirked at him.

"No," he answered. He frowned in thought. "Well, actually, yeah. Do you want me to help you get out of bed?"

"I would like to speak to you first," Severus answered, his mouth turning down in a slight frown. Harry tensed. But he couldn't think of anything he'd done recently that would warrant a lecture, so he shrugged.

"All right," he nodded as he sat up straighter and twisted around a bit so that it was less of a strain on his neck to look at his father. Severus rested his hands on either side of the bed, next to Harry's knees. He leaned forward a bit, narrowing his eyes. He seemed to be studying Harry intently and Harry wondered exactly what he was looking for.

"How are you feeling?" Severus finally asked, sounding very tense. Harry shrugged.

"I'm all right."

"I spoke with Lupin earlier." He paused, his eyes shadowed with concern. "He said you refused all his requests to eat." Harry bit his lip. Those conversations with Remus were vague against his memories.

"I meant to eat..." At least Harry thought he had. Severus' face relaxed a bit.

"A self-imposed fast is a common reaction to stress," his father assured him and Harry nodded, relieved as it seemed he wasn't going to comment on how irresponsible he'd obviously been. Severus gazed at him for a moment before asking, "Do you feel ready to begin eating again?"

Harry felt certain his father was really inquiring over his mental state. He was about to answer in the affirmative anyway, when his eyes fell on a folded copy of the Daily Prophet at the end of the bed.

Harry Potter...Junior Death Eater?

With a gasp, Harry snatched up the paper.

The true nature of Harry Potter seems to rest securely with Severus Snape, Hogwarts Potions Master, once believed to be a former supporter of He Who Must Not be Named. After recent events, there is no doubt that Snape, until two nights ago, was still one of You Know Who's most loyal followers. Unfortunately, for this duplicitous Potions Master, his darkest secret finally came to light this fateful Halloween, exactly fifteen years after Harry Potter became the only person to survive the Killing Curse.

Harry continued to read as his breathing quickened, his face beginning to flush in anger.

For sixteen years, Snape carried around his shameful secret. And after years of careful concealment, Snape's Master finally learned the shocking truth: Snape's son is none other than Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived.

Once Snape's treachery was discovered, He Who Must Not Be Named ordered Snape to bring Harry before him. Snape agreed, eager to rid himself of the wretched weight of his own deceit. But Snape's repeated efforts were no match for the courageous Ministry Aurors, who foiled Snape's final bold plot to allow Death Eaters access to Hogwarts, to kidnap The Boy Who Lived. Snape is said to have cried out Harry's name on his dying breath, cursing the son he had tried so hard to kill.

The circumstances which led to Lily Evans carrying a Death Eater's child are still unclear, though one can only assume it was not by her own choice-

Harry's vision blurred in rage and his fist clenched around the paper and without any warning, it was plucked from his hand. His eyes shot up. Severus was standing in front of him, gazing at him calmly; somehow he'd managed to get out of bed on his own.

"She-she was trying to imply that you-you-" Harry sputtered furiously, unable to say the dreadful word. His father nodded once.

"Yes."

"And she said you were trying to bring me to Voldemort!" he continued, his voice ringing with outrage. His father simply nodded again, his face passive. Harry's face burned. "But, everybody will believe it!"

"Do not exaggerate, Harry," Severus chided. "Some will undoubtedly believe Ms. Skeeter's version-"

"Version?" Harry echoed in disbelief. "Her deliberate lies, you mean. You're not even dead!" he erupted.

"Harry," his father said quietly, "it will do little good for you to lose your temper over the lies written in the Daily Prophet. This will not be an end to it." Harry opened his mouth to retort, but snapped it closed almost immediately, remembering he'd promised himself he wouldn't argue with his father anymore.

"Right," he agreed with a firm nod. Severus raised his eyebrows in surprise at the easy acquiescence.

As though he didn't entirely believe that Harry had gotten his message, Severus continued, "Your classmates will have read the article, and it is likely that by now, there are even wilder assertions running rampant throughout the school."

Harry groaned. "Shit," he moaned. He glanced up sheepishly. "Sorry." But strangely, Severus didn't comment on his cursing.

"You will need to prepare yourself before you return to classes. Even your fellows in Gryffindor Tower will certainly not ignore this issue," Severus was saying, but Harry was barely listening as he thought about the prospect of returning to class. He was dreading it; he was looking forward to a return to the Tower even less.

"Harry?"

Harry shook himself. "Erm...what did you say?" he asked. Severus was peering at him.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked, and Harry was brought up short by the direct question.

He didn't think he was ready to discuss exactly what he had been thinking, so he said vaguely, "Just not looking forward to going back to class." Severus narrowed his eyes, making Harry's insides twitch with his not-quite-honest response. After all, lying probably wouldn't go well with his self-imposed promise.

"You are concerned with the reactions of your classmates?" his father inquired.

"Yeah," Harry said quickly, apparently unable to cap off the lying. But what else was he supposed to say?

Severus pursed his lips, and Harry was almost sure he would challenge his answer, but after a moment, he said only, "You need to eat breakfast."

Harry cocked an eyebrow. "So do you."

His father mimicked his expression before turning slowly to his bureau. His movements were stiff and Harry felt a pang of guilt that he had been poring over Rita Skeeter's slanderous article instead of helping his father out of bed. With quick steps, Harry made it to the bureau first and opened it swiftly. Severus nodded his appreciation and Harry leaned his shoulder against the wall as he watched him picking out a set of clothing. Severus, once his arms were full of fabric, turned to Harry and raised his eyebrows. Harry smiled at him.

"I didn't think you owned anything but black," he mused. Severus' upper lip curled slightly.

"It seems I am full of surprises," he returned. Harry laughed as he pushed off from the wall and closed the wooden doors.

Harry walked beside his father, who moved even more slowly, down the short corridor. When they reached the door to the washroom, Harry's stomach began to flutter nervously. There was no reason for it, he told himself firmly. It was only a shower. Fifteen minutes. Severus was gazing at him again and Harry fidgeted under the scrutiny. Severus squeezed his shoulder firmly, before turning into the washroom; he closed the door softly behind him.

The sound echoed through Harry's head as he listened to the pounding of his own heart. And that was when Harry decided he had gone completely, barking mad. Not only had he made a complete fool of himself last night, blubbering all over his father...now he was frightened of a shower.

"Bloody hell," he muttered as he braced himself against the wall and slid carefully down its smooth surface, bringing his knees slowly upward until he was sitting like a lunatic on the hard stone floor. There was no hope for it. He would just accept that he was a mess. Harry folded his arms on top of his knees, propped his chin up on them and listened to the pulsing of his father's shower.

--

Severus would have preferred to remain underneath the hot water for much longer than the five short minutes he allotted himself, but his son's face had given away too much pain. He knew Harry was probably pacing in the sitting room, uncomfortable even with the brief separation. Severus dried and dressed quickly, smirking again as he pulled on his dark green shirt, a color as close to black as he could find. Feeling strangely empty without his wand to tuck into his sleeve, he pulled the door open and almost stepped on his son.

"Harry?" he questioned quickly, his pulse quickening. Harry brought his head up. Harry smiled up at him, though the expression was distinctly sad. "Are you all right?" Severus asked.

Harry considered him before asking, "Do you think I'm mental?"

Caught off guard, Severus stared. "I beg your pardon?" he queried, flummoxed.

"I didn't even know I wasn't eating!" Harry lamented, shaking his head a little. Severus narrowed his eyes.

"Harry," he begin, trying to placate, "as I explained-"

"And I'm sitting here...like a nutter, because I'm afraid you'll leave again," Harry told him, seeming not to even notice that Severus had spoken. Harry took a deep breath. "And I don't want to go back to class because then I won't be able to make sure you're all right." Harry said this last part quickly, releasing the pent-up breath.

Severus gazed down at his son, covering the reproach that wanted to slip through. He had suspected that Harry hadn't been completely truthful with his reason for feeling discomfort about attending classes again. He suspected as well that Harry was expecting some sort of reprimand for his incomplete honesty, and yet, Severus couldn't bring himself to do it. Not after his son had been through so much. Pursing his lips against the frown, Severus simply reached a hand down.

Harry, looking surprised, grasped Severus' hand and allowed himself to be pulled up off the floor. When Harry was standing, Severus said, very firmly, "There is nothing wrong with you, Harry, I assure you. You have been through a terrible strain-"

"You were a spy though," Harry pointed out and Severus felt a second's irritation with his son's constant interruptions. "You don't quit eating and start lounging about on dungeon floors, do you?" he asked quietly and Severus immediately felt a surge of guilt for feeling annoyed at his son.

"Even I do not always handle my emotions well," he offered, hoping to reassure. Harry sighed.

"Yeah," he murmured, looking decidedly dejected.

Wanting to distract him, Severus encouraged, "Perhaps you will feel better once you eat." Harry nodded, not looking convinced at all. Severus turned toward the sitting room and letting out another small sigh, Harry followed.

As soon as they entered the large room, Severus used the Floo to order two simple meals, his movements smoother than they had been before his shower. When their meals popped into existence on the small table beside the fireplace, Harry sat, eyeing his small portion of porridge and pumpkin juice; he looked queasy.

"Not to your liking?" Severus asked mildly. Harry looked up at him rather blearily.

"No, it's all right...just the idea of eating...well, it makes me want to sick up," he admitted bluntly, looking as though he was about prove that statement true at any moment.

"Do you think you might be able tolerate the juice?" Severus asked, keeping his voice even, so that Harry wouldn't feel unduly pressured; there was a light sheen of sweat on his forehead.

Harry nodded jerkily, not even trying to answer. He gripped the glass in his hand and took a shaky sip. He kept the rim of the glass pressed against his bottom lip, his eyes closed.

"Do not push yourself," Severus advised. Harry waited another few seconds and took another tiny sip before lowering the glass back to the table, his fingers still clamped around it. "Are you all right?" Severus asked gently.

Harry finally opened his eyes. "Yeah, I think so," he nodded, the motion much smoother.

"Take a few more sips," Severus directed, "and then the porridge will sit better." Severus watched closely as Harry's face went through several emotions, at least two of them lingering around defiance before he nodded stiffly and picked up the glass again. He took four slow sips before obediently spooning up a small bite of the plain porridge and with a quick glance at Severus, he placed it in his mouth.

Harry barely chewed, seeming to prefer to rid the porridge from his mouth as soon as possible. Severus kept his gaze trained on his son until he'd taken two more tiny bites. Satisfied that Harry was not going to be ill, he turned to his almost identical meal and finished it at a much more reasonable pace.

Even as Severus placed his spoon back into his empty bowl, Harry's own bowl was still more than half-full. "How do you feel?" Severus inquired. Harry's face had lost a bit of its pallor, though the skin under his eyes was still deeply shadowed.

"Better, I guess," Harry admitted with a small smile.

"Excellent," Severus murmured and then both of them turned toward the sound of the Floor flaring.

"I'll get it," Harry offered with a little chuckle, though Severus could find nothing particularly amusing about the strange phraseology. Severus turned around slowly as Harry pushed himself up from the table. "Morning, Madame Pomfrey, Professor McGonagall," he greeted when he was standing in front of the fireplace.

"Good morning, Mr. Potter," Poppy returned and Severus noted again the way Harry bit his lip at the moniker, just as he had earlier this morning when Severus had said it. He narrowed his eyes briefly in thought.

"May we step through?" Minerva asked politely and Harry nodded, gesturing for the two witches to enter.

"Severus, have you taken the potions I gave to Remus?" Poppy demanded without preamble.

"I have," he told her as she stepped closer and began waving her wand up and down; she nodded.

"Your recovery is proceeding nicely," she declared. Severus knew as much; he was after all, used to healing after serious injuries. Without waiting for a response, Poppy turned abruptly to Harry. She performed another Diagnostic Spell and nodded in satisfaction. "I see your father persuaded you to eat." Harry flushed.

He glanced over at Severus before answering, "Yes ma'am."

Poppy smiled and said to Severus, "Continue small meals of soft foods, for both of you for at least three days. Then you may gradually begin adding a greater variety to your diet. Harry should take a Nutritive Supplement once a day; I presume you have ample supplies in your stores?"

"I do," was all Severus said, indicating that he agreed with her treatment plan for both himself and Harry.

Minerva, who had been silent until this point, turned to Severus and informed him, "As Harry has missed classes for a week now, Severus, his professors are most anxious to see him again." Severus didn't miss the way Harry stiffened, though his black eyes had not left Minerva's stern face.

"Severus," Poppy interrupted, "I think it would be best for Harry to remain here at least until he's eating regular meals again. He needs to catch up on his sleep as well."

Severus understood immediately; she was just as concerned with Harry's mental health as his physical. He inclined his head; she returned the gesture and turned back to Harry.

"Follow your father's instructions exactly," she ordered briskly. Harry nodded, his features relaxing considerably and Severus was grateful for the Mediwitch's concern.

Minerva said tersely, "I will expect you to ensure that Harry does not fall any further behind then, Severus."

Severus narrowed his eyes at her tone. "Is it your custom to give orders to all of your students' parents, Minerva?" he asked icily.

Minerva pinched her lips together, but to Severus' great satisfaction, she had no answer.

"Floo me if you need anything, Severus," Poppy put in hurriedly before Severus could comment further and when Severus nodded, the Mediwitch ushered Minerva into the Floo; Poppy was smiling as she called for the Hospital Wing.

"Will you be able to get my assignments?" Harry asked once the women had left.

Severus stood carefully. He moved to sit in one of the softer armchairs while the breakfast dishes vanished from the table. Harry sat on the other chair's plush arm, slouching comfortably.

"I will Floo your Professors. I can begin tutoring you tomorrow," Severus answered. Harry sat up straighter.

"You're going to tutor me?" he asked, sounding nervous at the prospect. Severus eyed him.

"You have an objection?"

Harry shook his head quickly. "No, sir."

Severus frowned, disliking the formal title; his tone must have been sharper than he'd intended. "Perhaps tutor was not the correct term," he allowed. "I will retrieve your assignments and should you have questions, I will answer them."

Harry nodded as he slouched again. "What about Potions, though?"

"We will brew in my lab here. We can begin this afternoon on your Nutritive Supplement," Severus told him. Harry smiled.

Severus gazed at his son in amusement. "You are eager to brew a potion?" he asked.

Harry shrugged, still smiling. "Well, I did enjoy it last time, remember...no tedium?" he teased.

Severus smiled slightly, enjoying the sensation of his son wanting to participate in something he himself had always found so much pleasure in. He considered his next words carefully, deciding he needed to understand what Harry was feeling.

Severus shook his head, and attempting to sound amused, he said, "I do not believe I ever would have believed that Harry Potter would be so eager to brew a potion."

Harry bit his lip again, just as had Severus expected he would. He watched for a moment as Harry picked at one of the threads in the chair's arm.

"Is something bothering you, Harry?" he asked. Harry looked up and Severus recognized that his son was considering simply saying no. But finally, Harry shrugged.

"My name."

Even though Severus understood what Harry meant, he repeated, "Your name?"

Harry nodded, his fingers twisted together, a clear sign of his distress. "Yeah. If I was any other person, nobody would care. It's all because I'm Harry Potter, the bloody Boy Who Lived," he said miserably, casting his eyes down once more.

"It does not help that I am Severus Snape, Death Eater," Severus pointed out. Harry looked up sharply.

"You're not a Death Eater," he said heatedly and Severus was taken aback by the vehemence in his son's voice. Harry swallowed and continued, his voice softer, "But that's all anyone's going to see when they look at us: Potter and Snape."

Although it pained him to admit, Severus knew Harry was right. "There is nothing we can do about the perceptions of others," Severus said quietly. Harry frowned.

"I could change my name...show people that I really want to be your son."

Severus shook his head, having prepared himself for this. "Changing your name at his point, would cause unnecessary uproar with the public," Severus told him. Harry sagged.

"But I thought you'd want me to have your name. You seemed pleased that mum considered herself Lily Snape and that she considered me that way as well."

Severus' chest constricted at the quiet hurt in his son's voice. He said reassuringly, "Of course I would be pleased for you to take my name." Harry nodded reservedly, sensing Severus would say more. Severus sighed. "It would however, be perceived as my pressuring you into it. Rita Skeeter would likely write a follow-up article about that very notion."

Harry considered that.

"You're right, I suppose," he finally conceded with a frown.

Relenting a bit at his son's morose expression, Severus suggested, "Perhaps you could combine the two names."

Harry's lips twitched and his eyes began to sparkle with mirth. "What, like Harry Snotter?" he asked innocently. Severus glowered at him and Harry laughed. The sound warmed Severus. He shook his head in amusement.

"I was thinking more along the lines as using Snape as a second middle name," he told his son pointedly. Harry tilted his head in thought. Then he sighed.

"Well, Voldemort can't live forever," he concluded resignedly. "I guess I'll just have to wait."

Severus was about to reply when green flames reappeared in the fireplace; Severus frowned at the second interruption. Even before his face appeared, Severus knew it would be the Headmaster.

"Good morning, Severus, Harry. May I step through?"

"You always do," Severus said with a pointed look. Harry's lips twitched again. Albus shook his head in amusement and stepped onto the hearth rug.

"How are you, Severus?" he asked. As Severus was growing tired of this constant query, he ignored it.

"What can I do for you, Albus?"

Albus' eyes crinkled with mirth. "We have many things to discuss," he said mysteriously and Severus pursed his lips in annoyance.

"Lupin informed me already about the Slytherins...and about Lucius as well."

"Ah. Wonderful, dear boy," Albus enthused, choosing a seat on the sofa and folding his hands in his violet-covered lap. He gazed at Harry and Severus.

"Was there something else?" Severus pressed, after a moment had passed. Albus glanced meaningfully at Harry. Harry frowned, not missing the look; his face fell.

"Harry, I'd like a word with your father," the Headmaster said gently.

"Albus," Severus began, his tone warning the Headmaster not to overstep his bounds, but Harry interrupted him again.

"It's all right. I should go get dressed anyway."

Severus narrowed his eyes at the way Harry's voice trembled slightly. Severus wanted to tell his son he didn't have to leave, but his rational mind convinced him that Harry would only get over his fears if he faced them, so he nodded. And then he watched, his worry deepening as Harry slowly stood up with a little nod, as if in personal encouragement, before walking quickly out of the room. Severus continued to watch until Harry had rounded the corner into the corridor. He let out a sigh and turned back to the Headmaster. Albus was peering at him over his half-moon spectacles.

He didn't say anything though until they had both watched Harry walking swiftly past the sitting room again, on the way to the washroom this time. Harry's eyes were turned determinedly forward, his jaw stiff. If Severus hadn't known what was bothering his son, he would have thought him furious about something.

Albus waited until they heard the water turning on and then he said, "I spoke with Poppy. She is very concerned about Harry's mental state."

Severus glared at the Headmaster. "I was under the impression that as a Mediwitch, Poppy would respect Harry's privacy," he snapped. Albus shook his head.

"You know very well I am kept informed about the health concerns of all the students, Severus. Harry is no different, even as your son," he said reprovingly. Severus' jaw clenched with the rebuke; he didn't respond.

Albus sighed. "He's been under a terrible strain.

"I hadn't noticed," Severus said sarcastically. The Headmaster lifted his eyebrows.

"Really, Severus, there is no need to be so tetchy. I'm simply concerned about Harry."

Severus closed his eyes, forcing himself to get his temper under control; Harry's insecurities were setting his nerves on edge. "My apologies, Albus." Albus smiled at him kindly.

"Quite all right, Severus," he assured the Potions Master. He leaned forward in his chair. "Have you had time to consider the circumstances surrounding your rather unusual trip beyond the veil?" he asked abruptly. Severus raised his eyebrows at the unexpected question.

"I do not know what you mean," he admitted. Albus frowned slightly.

"Did you not wonder, Severus, why you did not simply move on, as we all do when we die?"

Severus frowned.

"Lily said it was because I wasn't ready to leave Harry."

Albus' eyes twinkled as he shook his head. "Those who aren't ready to leave, remain here as ghosts, Severus, do they not?" When Severus had no response, the Headmaster continued, "I think Lily's Charm affected Harry instead of Lily."

Severus narrowed his eyes. "That's impossible," he said firmly. Albus smiled.

"Lily was already expecting Harry when she cast the Impentribiilus Charm, was she not?"

Severus nodded automatically; he remembered well that very issue being the source of a heated argument between himself and his wife. Albus nodded again, looking satisfied.

"The Charm was designed to destroy Voldemort, but I believe, Severus that it also bound you and Harry together."

Severus stared at him, as the foreign words settled into his brain.

"It was not meant to work that way, Albus," he denied. "Lily enhanced the Impentribiilus Charm so that she and I would be able use Voldemort's Mark against him. There was never any intention of creating any sort of connection between us other than when we would have activated the Charm...and certainly not a connection with Harry." Albus nodded, his blue eyes bright with excitement.

"Yes, yes, Severus...but don't you see? Lily designed it to destroy Voldemort completely, including all the pieces of his soul. His soul, Severus," Albus stressed delightedly. "You should have left this world, Severus, by all rights. How else can you explain what happened to you, if your soul is not connected with Harry's? Neither Poppy nor I could find you. We called you, over and over...and yet, you only heard Harry..."

Severus was still staring.

"But that means..." he began, but he couldn't finish. Albus clasped his hands together, his blue eyes suddenly very intense.

"Yes, I think so, Severus."

Severus' mind was reeling. It was too much. It was impossible and yet, if it was true...if Harry could replace Lily...

"It is a lot to take in, my boy," Albus said quietly. Severus nodded mutely. It was indeed. Albus stood up and patted Severus' shoulder gently. "Take time to recover and let Harry recover as well. We will discuss this again when both of you are ready...I almost forgot," he said cheerfully, pulling out a dark, thin wand. "Your new wand...Ollivander was more than happy to oblige."

Severus took the proffered wand silently, testing the feel of it in his hand. It was exactly like his old one. "Thank you," he said, grateful to have a wand again. Albus nodded.

"You are quite welcome, my boy. I will stop by again in a few days." Severus inclined his head, still immersed in his thoughts.

He watched distractedly as the Headmaster went up in flames. And then he realized with a start, that the shower was still running. It had been much too long. He stood up as quickly as his stiff joints would allow, anxiety taking over as he walked toward the corridor. He turned the corner and only narrowly avoided stepping on Harry for the second time that morning.

Harry was sitting on the floor, his knees drawn up to his chin; he was hugging his legs to his chest. Though he'd changed his clothes, his hair was perfectly dry, showing no evidence at all of having been wet recently. Harry had obviously been eavesdropping. Severus stared down at him, immediately forcing back his annoyance. Harry looked up at him.

--

"Are you all right?" his father asked stiffly. Harry nodded quickly as he pushed himself up and then he waited for the rebuke, wishing fervently that he could've managed to keep his promise for more than eight hours. "Did you take a shower?" Severus asked, in that same stiff tone.

Harry wanted to admit that he hadn't, that he'd only quickly changed his clothes but as his half-truth earlier had possibly saved them a row, an outright lie would probably do the same, so he nodded. Severus narrowed his eyes. After a moment of silent consideration, he nodded as well.

"I assume you have some questions about what you heard."

Harry blinked up at his father. Some questions? Surely that wasn't all he was going to say about Harry listening to private conversations? Of course, this could very well be an attempt to trap him into admitting he'd been eavesdropping, he mused. His father was a Slytherin, after all.

"I didn't really hear much," Harry lied again, feeling the familiar prick of guilt. The muscles around his father's jaw twitched before he nodded once more, accepting Harry's lie. Harry shifted uncomfortably.

"I need to compose a note to your professors, requesting your assignments," Severus said, his voice still a little too stiff for Harry's comfort. "You should rest for awhile if you plan to assist me with the Nutritive Supplement after lunch. You may rest on the sofa if you wish."

"All right," Harry agreed. Severus nodded curtly and turned slowly toward the sitting room. Swallowing nervously, Harry followed. He was itching to ask his father about his mum' Charm, but now that he had acted as though he hadn't heard the conversation, he didn't see how he could.

He hadn't really understood what they were talking about except that it sounded like his soul had somehow connected itself with Severus when his father and mum had cast his mum's Charm. And his father and Dumbledore had obviously thought they'd made some sort of amazing discovery about the Charm...something that had rendered Severus almost speechless. Harry turned the conversation over and over in his mind as he watched his father scratching his quill against a piece of parchment at the table.