A Life More Ordinary

Grimmauld Place, September 1, 1992

"I can't find my wand!"

"It's on your bed," Sirius said, not turning around from where he was re-checking to make sure Harry's books were all together. "Where's your History of Magic book?"

"I don't know," Harry said, impatient as he swiped his wand from the covers which had never been put to rights after he woke up. "I don't even know where my trainers are!"

"Right here," Sirius said, scooping them from the desk and handing them over to Harry, who took them and laced them swiftly, not even looking up. "Accio History of Magic textbook," Sirius said and with hurried fluttering, the book slid out of the under the bed and flew into Sirius' palm. "All right, that's all of them.

"We're going to be late, Sirius," Harry said, his anxiety over the prospect driving his voice up an octave.

"We're not going to be late."

"We need to move along," Remus said as he came in holding a stack of clothes which had somehow found their way downstairs. "Or we'll be late."

"I told you!"

"Harry, mind your tone please," Remus said. Harry fell silent and looked away from Remus' small frown. "Are we ready, then?"

"Looks like we found everything," Sirius answered, plucking a final pair of socks from the top of the bookshelf; he handed it to Harry with a bolstering smile. "Oh! Let me fetch you some galleons for the train."

He went across the corridor and came back a moment later with the promised coins. He halted just inside Harry's room. Remus was holding the Marauders' Map and James' cloak.

"I didn't Remus," Harry was saying quite emphatically.

"Harry-"

"I didn't," Harry insisted as he shook his head.

"What's going on?"

Harry and Remus turned.

"What are those doing in here?" Sirius asked.

"I didn't take them!" Harry exploded.

"Hey," Sirius said with surprise. "I wasn't accusing you-"

"Remus already did," Harry said; his arms crossed over his chest with jerky movements.

Sirius refrained from glancing at Remus as he said quietly, "Where were they?"

"They were in my trunk but I didn't put them there."

"And you don't know how they got there?"

"I didn't take them, Sirius," Harry said, looking up again; his arms were stretched taut at his sides.

Having never been confronted with a question of Harry's honesty, Sirius didn't know what to say. He didn't really think Harry wanted either the map or the cloak badly enough to steal them; and it wasn't very clever besides as there would be no one else to blame the theft on.

"All right," he finally said, most of all not wanting to believe that Harry would lie to them. "I suppose they just got mixed in with all the packing yesterday." Sirius could easily see that Remus wasn't of the same mind, but they'd agreed long ago that it was best not to argue in front of Harry. There would be plenty of time for that after Harry was safely on the train.

"We'd best be going," Sirius said and got no response; Harry wandered to his bookshelf and began idly running his fingers over the bindings. Remus went across the corridor, presumably to put the cloak and map away.

Harry watched him walk away and Sirius tended to securing the trunk. "Anything else?" Sirius asked. Still mute, Harry shook his head. Sirius sighed.

Remus stopped in the doorway and took a final look around Harry's room. "Is everything ready?"

Sirius took a second look as well. "Seems to be."

Remus nodded and with a quiet command, the trunk and Hedwig's cage were floating along after him and down the stairs. Once they were all in the parlor, Sirius remembered the galleons he'd collected--in his pocket now--and then Harry had to go back upstairs to fetch the coin purse he'd left on his desk.

"I don't think he would lie to us," Sirius said in a low voice once Harry had cleared the stairs. Remus shook his head.

"I didn't accuse him of lying," he said just as quietly. "But the map and cloak were in his trunk; how else could they have gotten there?"

Sirius didn't have an answer to that, and if he was honest, Harry's reticence made him wonder if Harry was feeling guilty. But he just wasn't willing to believe Harry would lie to them.

"But why would he lie?" Sirius finally asked, glancing up the empty staircase.

"So he wouldn't be punished."

Sirius pursed his lips as he immediately rejected that reasoning. Harry had never been unwilling to accept the consequences of his actions. Remus sighed.

"I know you like to think the best of Harry, but he's like any other normal child and obviously he wanted the cloak and map badly enough that he took them. Why wouldn't he want them? Especially as they belonged to James."

That made Sirius pause his protest. "You think he took them because they make him feel closer to James?" The words made his chest ache, though he knew it was a childish reaction. It was stupid to be jealous of the father who would never get to see his son grow up.

"If you could have something of Mr. Potter's, wouldn't you want it?"

Sirius said nothing and the following silence reminded both of them that Harry was still upstairs. Making certain his tone would be light, Sirius called, "Harry!"

A second later, looking a bit breathless and adjusting the pack over his shoulders, Harry emerged from the landing.

"Did you find it?" Sirius asked and Harry patted his pack.

They Apparated to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters with only minutes left to spare. Remus took the trunk to the man in the furry orange hat while Sirius checked that Harry had his wand and mirror, and then wasted no more time in giving Harry a hug. "Write to us in the morning and let us know how the train ride was," he said. Harry nodded into his shoulder. He seemed reluctant to let go and when he did, he didn't go immediately to Remus.

The whistle sounded then. "Come on, Harry!" Ron shouted from a window where he was leaning out.

Suddenly panicked, Harry grabbed Hedwig's cage and yelled, "Bye!" as he leapt up the three steps into the train. The train lurched and Harry nearly toppled back onto the platform, only just managing to catch himself. "I'm all right!" he called, watching as his parents shot forward as though to catch him. They relaxed a little and Harry waved once more before ducking inside.

He readjusted his bag, shifting its weight more evenly against his back. The bloody thing weighed a ton. He was still panting a bit from the impromptu jump into the train--he couldn't believe they'd almost missed it. Of course, if Remus hadn't demanded an explanation about the map and cloak, they wouldn't have been quite so late.

So if Remus hadn't gotten a hug, that was his own fault, Harry thought grumpily and then immediately regretted thinking it even though he was still irritated with Remus. As if he'd ever go into their room and snoop around. He didn't even know where they kept the map and cloak.

Even though the cloak did technically belong to him.

Harry tried to squelch his irritation; no need to make Hermione start asking questions already. He waved at Ginny as he passed a compartment where she was sitting with a blonde girl Harry didn't recognize. The girl smiled dreamily at him.

The rest of the compartments were mostly filled and Harry smiled as Ron's head poked out of one further down the train. But before he could make it very far, Draco stepped out of a different compartment and stopped short when he saw Harry.

"Hi," Harry said, feeling suddenly more cheerful.

Draco's pale eyes darkened, his mouth instantly scowling and Harry took an involuntary step back. "Draco..." But in that same instant, Draco's face cleared and he cocked his head, looking confused to find Harry standing there in front of him.

"Hi Harry. Did you just come aboard?"

"Er... yeah," Harry said, eyeing his friend carefully. "We nearly missed the train."

"You should get yourself a house-elf. Remus and Sirius can certainly afford one."

"My trunk was turned over this morning after breakfast. That's why we were late," Harry said with a shrug as he followed Draco down the train to where Ron, Hermione and Neville were already comfortable. "Sirius spelled most of it back in."

"House-elves are faster," Draco said prosaically.

"Wizards don't need elves to do things we can already do," Hermione said with a small frown. Draco sighed in that put-out way of his and dropped in the empty seat across from her, but he didn't argue the point and Hermione immediately launched into a lecture about the correlation between Muggle slavery and house-elves.

Ron groaned while Neville and Harry exchanged resigned looks. Draco was staring at the window and didn't even seem to notice that Hermione was talking, but Harry was too busy wishing Ron would quit making gagging noises to pay much attention to his blond friend.

--

The Gryffindors made their over-excited way up to the dorm many hours later, with full bellies and mouths that would not be quieted; no matter how many times Percy ordered it. And though Harry had enjoyed the train ride with his friends and riding in the carriages pulled along by the great winged thestrals that nobody else could see, the mirror in his pocket seemed to weigh more than it had when he'd started out on the Express.

He supposed that it had looked rather suspicious that the map and cloak had just been sitting there in his trunk, but honestly how stupid did Remus think he was? If he was going to steal them, he'd have hidden them better! But more importantly than that, Sirius had believed him.

So why hadn't Remus?

"Harry?"

Harry blinked, finding Ginny surrounded by a group of other first years; she was tapping his arm. All of the other girls were giggling. The portrait had already swung open and Percy was waiting impatiently.

"Oh," Harry said, wishing he wouldn't blush. "Er, sorry. You first," he said to the girls which set them off into peals of laughter for some reason. They brushed past him and he heard one of them say, "Harry Potter... Can you believe it?"

"Ron said some of the other kids were weird when they find out you're Harry Potter," Ginny said as she ducked past him; she smirked. "I didn't believe him..."

Harry sighed and turned quickly away from the girls as they continued to goggle at him and went up to his dorm. The other boys were already in various states of undress, except Draco who was taking neatly-folded pajamas from his trunk.

"Where were you?" Ron asked as he hopped into his bottoms.

"Talking with Ginny."

Ron paused, starkers from the waist up. "She wasn't crying or anything was she?"

"Ginny?" Harry scoffed as he dragged his trunk over to his bed. "Ginny doesn't cry."

"Yeah," Ron said and felt around blindly for his shirt. "Thought she might be homesick."

"Don't think so."

"One of the first year boys looked like he was about to cry when we came in," Seamus piped up from across the room. "That Creevey kid who kept asking for your autograph," he said to Harry.

"We were all homesick," Harry reminded them.

"Not me," Ron said definitely.

The other boys rolled their eyes but didn't argue.

"Hey Draco," Ron said as the blond headed for the loo, "did your mum send along one of her brilliant parcels with sweets?"

Draco continued on toward the loo without answering, his eyes unwavering.

"What's his problem?" Seamus asked as the door closed behind him.

Harry shrugged, eyeing the door. "I don't know. Maybe he's tired."

Seamus snorted. "You sound like me mam."

"Shut it," Harry said with a grin; he gave the other boy's shoulder a shove and Seamus smirked. Harry's grin quickly faded as he lifted his trunk's lid. Right on the top sat the Invisibility Cloak and the map. Before he could process that, Ron snatched the map away.

"You brought it!"

"What is it?" Dean asked, leaning over from his bed on the other side of the room.

"It's a map of Hogwarts! With all sorts of secret passages-"

"Really?"

"Where did you get it?" Neville asked.

"Ron, give it back," Harry interrupted the other boys quickly but even though he reached out for it, Ron spun away and went to pore over it with Dean and Seamus.

"He's got a cloak that can make him invisible too," he said excitedly. "We'd be able to sneak around Filch for sure."

"I can't believe Remus and Sirius let you bring it," Seamus said. Harry was too busy staring at the Invisibility Cloak, sitting calmly on the top of his neatly stacked clothes to bother with answering. Two thoughts rioted around his brain: one, there was no way they could be in his trunk; and two, Remus was going to kill him.

"Let's see the cloak," Seamus. Harry shook his head numbly, his fingers already tangled in the slippery material. What was he supposed to do now? Contact Sirius with the mirror and tell him? Because surely they'd notice it was missing even though Harry had no idea how it had gotten in his trunk--twice now. But what if Sirius didn't believe him this time?

Seamus was leaning over his shoulder now, trying to see what was so special about the shimmering fabric. But before he could demand to try it out, Percy's head came around the door. He cleared his throat and all the other boys turned to look at him.

"What do you want?" Ron asked with a scowl.

Percy's eyebrows made a disapproving line before he turned to Harry. "Remus is outside the portrait hole, Harry. He wants to speak with you."

Harry's stomach dropped. "Remus is here?"

"Yes," Percy said, gesturing him forward with an impatient hand. "I don't know why he didn't use the Floo, but he couldn't come in through the portrait hole, of course, since he doesn't have the password. And it's nearly past curfew but since he is your guardian-"

"He gets it, Percy," Ron grumbled. "We don't need a lecture about the rules."

Percy's eyes narrowed. "All of you should be in your beds," he snapped. "Harry, come along now."

Harry vacillated as Percy stood there in the doorway. Should he bring the cloak and map down with him? Remus would be even more irritated if he didn't--even if Harry hadn't taken them. He swallowed and gathered the cloak close to his chest. Ron's eyebrows shot up as Harry took the map clumsily from the bed. Harry pursed his lips and was grateful that Ron didn't ask any questions.

Harry trailed down the long flight of stairs after Percy and found himself wishing that Percy was still next to him as the portrait swung open and Harry stepped through on his own. Remus was waiting for him on the other side.

Remus frowned as his normally calm brown eyes travelled over the loot in Harry's arms.

"I didn't take them," Harry blurted, his cheeks already beginning to tingle. Remus folded his arms over his chest.

"Then would you care to explain how they came to be at Hogwarts?"

The items in question were clutched tighter to Harry's jumper. "I don' know."

"You don't know?" Remus echoed. He shook his head, then took Harry's shoulders and leaned down so that he and Harry were eye to eye. "Harry, Sirius and I put the cloak and map away for a reason; though neither of us considered that you weren't responsible enough to have them, you've proven otherwise now."

Harry's stomach burned, with anger this time. "I didn't," he tried to insist but Remus narrowed his eyes, something that Harry had never seen him do in anger and though it made him more indignant he didn't know how to respond.

"Harry," Remus said in a tone that was unusually exasperated, "you have them in your hands. And yet, you're lying to me- ."

"I'm not-"

"Enough." Remus' soft command cut off the protest. He straightened but Harry didn't tilt his neck to meet his eyes again; not until Remus said quietly, "Look at me."

Harry looked, his fingers wrinkling the map as they clenched.

"I want you to tell me the truth, young man. Right now."

Harry felt the muscles in his gut coiling and he wanted to shout at Remus that he hadn't done it; to release the tension there, but all he could do was stand there and said in a voice full of whispered anger, "I am." And then when Remus didn't look any closer to believing him, he mumbled, "Sirius would believe me."

Remus dropped down again so that his face was only centimeters from Harry's and his fingers gripped more firmly. "Sirius believed you earlier. But I know he'll be very disappointed that you aren't willing to admit your mistake."

A hot flush burned Harry's cheeks as the words kicked him soundly in the stomach.

"Unless you want to tell me the truth," Remus went on in that same low tone, "you'll miss Gryffindor's first match."

Harry slowed his breathing as tears burned his nostrils. But he didn't argue. "Fine," he said hoarsely and then before Remus could see him cry, Harry pushed the bundle of fabric and the parchment into Remus' hands and half-dove through the portrait hole. The Fat Lady's picture thudded behind him.

His breath hitched as he stood there staring at the fireplace without really seeing it. But he forced himself not to cry, no matter how his sinuses burned. He hadn't taken the stupid map and no matter how much he wished he could have his dad's cloak, he hadn't taken that either.

They were supposed to believe him. Especially Sirius.

Hurt easily made way for anger, until it made his temples pound. He yanked his mirror from his pocket, all of the anger he couldn't unleash on Remus, about to explode.

--

"Sirius."

The hissed syllables startled Sirius from the numbers he was tabulating. Ollivander lifted his head from the piece of wood he was carving, his eyebrows high.

"Is that Harry?"

Sirius nodded even as he twisted round in his chair and pulled the mirror from his cloak. Harry glared up at him from the surface.

"Harry? What's the matter?"

"I didn't do it!"

"What?" Sirius said blankly. "Didn't do what?"

"Remus said you wouldn't believe me but I didn't take them, Sirius. I didn't!"

"Hey," Sirius said gently, "slow down, kiddo. When did you speak with Remus?"

Harry's face--already flushed--deepened to a cherry red as he pulled in a few quick breaths. "He... was here." The fast breaths stopped abruptly as Harry struggled and then his face crumpled.

"Harry..."

But Harry was gulping and couldn't answer as tears gathered in his eyes. Sirius swore under his breath and then said so Harry would hear, "I'll be right there." Harry didn't protest and a minute later, Sirius stepped out into the Gryffindor common room.

Harry was standing in front of the portrait hole with his arms hugging his waist.

Hoping for a bit of privacy, Sirius took his godson's arm and maneuvered them out into the corridor and then pulled Harry against his chest; Harry's arms stayed firmly where they were, but Sirius held him anyway as Harry struggled with his tears, his own heart pounding an anxious rhythm. What the hell had happened?

But he forced himself not to ask yet. He waited and eventually the stiff posture eased and somewhere along the way, Harry's fingers had knotted themselves into Sirius' shirt.

"What happened?" Sirius asked quietly.

There was a fair bit of snuffling before Harry answered, "I didn't take them."

Sirius smoothed his palm over Harry's wayward hair. "What didn't you take?"

A few slow steadying breaths. "The map... and Dad's cloak."

Confused, it took Sirius a moment to respond and when he did, he tried not to let his irritation with Remus show. Why would Remus come here to talk about what had happened this morning? "Remus came here to ask if you took them?"

Harry shook his head, his face still hidden. "They were here," he mumbled.

Still absently stroking the back of Harry's head, Sirius said, "I don't understand. Remus brought the map and cloak with him?"

So Harry explained that he'd found them in his trunk after he'd arrived in his dorm and how Remus had come to demand an explanation. The effort not to cry began again as he finished, "...but he wouldn't believe me."

Sirius didn't respond immediately, as he tried to figure out what had possessed Remus to storm in here in the first place and then to just leave Harry on the verge of tears?

Harry looked up, his worried, red-rimmed eyes brimming again. "I didn't Sirius," he said hoarsely; he was holding his breath again.

"All right," Sirius said softly, tucking Harry's head back into his chest. "Shh..."

After a moment, Harry lifted his eyes again. "You believe me, don't you?"

"Of course I do." The words came automatically to Sirius' tongue and once said, he realized that it might not have been the best answer. But one glance at the relief on Harry's face and he didn't care that he and Remus were supposed to present a united front. He brushed his fingers through Harry's hair, reassuring, "We'll sort it out, all right?"

Harry nodded and Sirius handed him a handkerchief. While Harry mopped, he said in a sniffly voice, "I didn't even have my trunk until we went upstairs. That's where I found it; you can ask the other boys and then... maybe Remus will believe me."

He sounded so hopeful that Sirius felt another rush of irritation for Remus. "I'm sure it was just a misunderstanding," he said. It sounded stupid and Harry peered at him with doubtful eyes as he lifted his glasses to scrub the last of the not-quite tears away. Sirius sighed and plucked the glasses from Harry's face. "I'll explain it to him."

That wasn't much better but Harry nodded while Sirius cleaned the smudged lenses before slipping the glasses over Harry's ears once more.

"Thanks," Harry murmured, adjusting them and blinking up at Sirius. Sirius smiled, thinking his godson looked especially young. He ran a thumb over his kid's mussed hair and Harry smiled a little too.

"Why don't we sit for a bit?" Sirius suggested. "And you can tell me about the train ride and the feast." He and Harry sat against the wall next to the Fat Lady, who eyed them with a fair amount of suspicion. "Did you have fun?"

"Guess so," Harry said with a half-shrug.

"You only guess so?" Sirius echoed. He elbowed Harry playfully in the ribs and got another brief smile. "Didn't you stuff yourself full of sweets and play Gobstones until your fingers wore off?"

Harry shook his head, looking only vaguely amused. "We ate a few chocolate frogs--Ron and me. But Draco was acting weird."

"How so?"

Sirius waited while Harry shifted restlessly, finally putting a loose arm round his shoulders; Harry settled against Sirius' side. He tangled and untangled his fingers as he answered, "Dunno. He didn't talk nearly the entire ride on the train... or at dinner."

"Maybe he's homesick."

"Yeah. Maybe."

Together, they watched the Fat Lady hopping into a neighboring painting. The wizard she spoke with craned his short neck to see Harry and Sirius and then they spoke in whispers, staring all the while.

"All of you were getting on well at the end of last term, weren't you?" Sirius asked, drawing Harry's attention from the gossiping portraits.

"Sure. Seamus likes to gripe at Draco and Ron still thinks he's a snob but we're all friends. I don't think he's mad at us or anything."

"No," Sirius agreed and gave Harry's bicep a squeeze. "I'm sure he'll be back to his chipper self tomorrow."

Harry yawned through is nod, but since he made no move to get up, Sirius didn't suggest it.

"Why were you at Ollivander's so late?" he asked when he was no longer pulling in oxygen.

"Remus has a deadline at the end of the week," Sirius reminded him. "No distractions." Sirius tried another smile; both of them well knew how focused Remus became near a deadline.

Harry didn't respond to Sirius' attempt at humor and Sirius floundered for a moment before he said, "Ollivander was carving his new batch of walnut."

Harry looked up, his green eyes suddenly bright with interest. "Yeah? Which cores was he going to put in? Had he tested them yet?"

The questions ran together and Sirius grinned. Harry peppered him with as many other questions as he could think of, and Sirius was more than happy to provide both of them with a distraction.

--

Remus wasn't in the kitchen when Sirius Flooed in awhile later and Sirius was grateful for that at least. He didn't want to shout at Remus any more than Harry did, but that's what he would do if he didn't give himself a few moments to calm down. He couldn't believe Remus had just left him there to cry.

Sirius didn't care that Remus certainly hadn't meant to do that. And he didn't care that Remus had as much right as he did to lecture Harry. But surely Remus should have seen that Harry wasn't lying.

Why else would the kid get so upset that Remus didn't believe him? He'd been practically hysterical. Well, perhaps not hysterical, but he had been adamant that he hadn't taken the bloody cloak and map.

Lying about it made no sense; not when he'd been caught with the evidence.

Sirius sighed and raked his fingers through his hair. He wasn't going to feel any less irritated, he realized as he stared through the doorway into the parlor. Drawing in a breath that he hoped would calm him enough, he went to the library door and knocked lightly.

He pushed the door open. Remus looked up and immediately furrowed his brow. "You're home early. Is everything all right?"

"No, it isn't," Sirius said, coming no further into the room. "I just came from Hogwarts. Harry contacted me as soon as you left."

Remus frowned, surprise evident in his eyes. "He did?"

"Yes. What did you say to him?"

"I found the map and cloak missing; I told him I was disappointed that he'd taken them-"

"He didn't take them."

Remus sighed. "Sirius, he had them with him when he met me outside the portrait hole and then he stood there and lied to me."

"He was in tears when he contacted me."

"He was?"

"Yes," Sirius said and folded his arms across his chest. "He was."

Remus grimaced but then the guilt cleared from his face and he shook his head. "He was probably upset because I punished him."

Sirius' back straightened indignantly. "Punished him?"

Remus set his quill down; it left a splotch of ink against his parchment. "He lied, Sirius and he stole from us-" Remus paused and tilted his head. "He didn't tell you?"

Sirius scowled. "He was obviously too embarrassed."

"That he's not allowed to play in the first Quidditch match?"

Confused, Sirius let his arms fall from where they were secured to his torso. "You banned him from Quidditch?" He shook his head and waved away a response though, ploughing on to more important things. "Do you even hear what you're saying, Remus? Harry wouldn't steal from us. And lying about it doesn't even make sense. Why would he bring the map and cloak down with him and then pretend he hadn't taken them?"

"If he was feeling guilty..." But the words were without conviction and Remus simply looked confused.

"He was distraught at the thought that you wouldn't believe him," Sirius said, doing his best not to allow more anger into the discussion. "I told him I would explain it to you, and I think that helped..."

Remus' quiet brown eyes flashed and Sirius trailed off.

"So you just went in there and told him you'd fix it?" Remus shook his head as he pushed himself to his feet. "Completely undermining what I'd just said?"

Sirius didn't want to admit that that's exactly what he'd done. "What was I supposed to do?" he demanded quietly. "He was crying; insisting that he hadn't taken them."

"I went there tonight to speak to Harry. I had the situation well in hand-"

"You left Harry nearly in tears," Sirius countered. "He called me because he was upset and I wasn't going to ignore that."

"I didn't know he was so upset." There was an edge in Remus' soft voice. "He threw the cloak and map at me and stormed back into the dorm. If I had known he was so distressed, I wouldn't have left."

Well, you should have known, was the immediate retort that Sirius wanted to make. But it would have cut Remus deeply, so he said nothing. And he and Remus stood, staring at one another.

"But you knew," Remus finally said, speaking the words that Sirius had wanted to avoid. Remus pressed his lips together, the hurt settling in his features.

"He was near tears when he contacted me," Sirius told him, Remus' pain amplifying in his own chest; wanting to explain away the incongruity. But Remus was too adept at seeing his own failings.

"You should have contacted me," he said. "Harry will only be confused if you and I say two different things."

Sirius' automatic sympathy was immediately trod upon. "You still don't believe him?"

Remus picked his quill up, clenched it briefly in his hand and set it down again before he said, "I want to believe him. Of course I do, but how else did they get in his trunk, Sirius?"

"I don't know," Sirius admitted, "but he's never given us any reason not to trust him. And I can't believe he'd lie after you told him he'd have to miss Quidditch. What would be the point?"

Remus had no answer for that.

"You should go speak with him in the morning," Sirius said and again, Remus frowned. "Perhaps let him know you've thought it over and you believe him-"

"I know how to speak with Harry without coaching."

Offended by the curt rebuff, Sirius said, "I didn't say you don't. But you were wrong tonight. Harry didn't take anything."

"Is that the only reason you're angry, Sirius?" Remus asked with narrowed eyes. "Or are you irritated that I scolded Harry at all?"

"Of course I'm irritated," Sirius said, feeling grumpier by the second. "He didn't do anything and you stormed in there and didn't even listen to him. How is that supposed to make me feel?"

"I dealt with the situation as best I could, Sirius," Remus said in a low voice, "and you had no right to interfere."

"You didn't see how upset he was!"

"How could I have?" Remus retorted. "Harry didn't contact me!"

Sirius didn't answer the accusation. How could he?

Once again, the two men stared at one another, both of them hurting for different reasons.

"I can accept that you and Harry have a bond that I'll never be part of," Remus finally said, subdued now.

"Moony-"

Remus swallowed and shook his head. "You rescued him, Sirius. Gave him his first home, his first unconditional love. I can't compete with that... I don't want to, but don't make it even harder for me." He glanced briefly away. "Even if I did make a mistake."

Sirius didn't know what to say, and he moved aside so that Remus could walk past and up the stairs. Sirius stared after him, wanting to follow and do something to make everything all better, but he didn't know how.

He'd known that those feelings were there; recognized as well that Harry came to him first about everything. He never discouraged it and he never would, though he had always done everything he could to foster the relationship between Remus and Harry. Harry loved Remus though, of that Sirius was certain. Remus knew it too and yet, it changed nothing.

Sirius stayed in the parlor for a long time that evening, staring at words in a book and making no sense of them. When he went upstairs, Remus was lying in bed; still awake. He turned his head when Sirius came in, watching while Sirius swapped his trousers and smart shirt for pajama bottoms.

But neither of them spoke as Sirius slid under the covers. They stared at the white ceiling together and after long, unbearable minutes, Sirius reached for Remus' hand. Their fingers twined effortlessly together, the ceiling still holding their attention.