It's Not Easy Being Green

Chapter 4: Super Bonus Chapter!! Learning Secret No Jutsu!!!

--------Laszlo-------

Laszlo sat on his porch and sighed. Things hadn't gotten off on the right foot. Not at all. Nathanyel was lonely, homesick, and depressed. It really affected his performance. In fact, they'd had to resort to chores in the village as part of the training, and even that seemed to be a bit much for him. Shinji wasn't happy.

And neither was Florian.

While Laszlo didn't particularly like the idea of sending reports of Nathanyel's progress to him, it couldn't be helped. Although he didn't usually seem it, Nathanyel could be stubborn, hot-headed, and completely irrational. It made for a very difficult student. And none of them were exceptionally good teachers in the first place, except for maybe Louis. But he didn't know much at all about these things.

Laszlo frowned to himself as he adjusted his glasses. That wasn't good enough for Florian. Nothing was.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Florian? Are you okay?"

"Tch." He shrugged.

"You don't look so good." Laszlo edged a bit closer to him and tried to look at his eyes. Florian just shoved him away.

"What do you know, eh? You're only six." Laszlo crossed his arms.

"Hmph. It looks like I know a lot more than I will when I'm sixteen."

"Shut up." But he was smiling, and that was good.

"Did Dad give you that medicine again?" Florian nodded. "Did you have to go to the lab?" Another nod. "And you're sure you're okay?" Laszlo managed to scramble onto Florian's bed and sit next to him.

"...Yeah. As long as it's not you." Laszlo frowned.

"I don't like this. I... I want to run away, and never come back." He didn't think he'd get very far, though. "Is that bad?"

"No. It's smart." Florian sighed. "I keep hearing tonight's the end of it for me. I promise, after tonight, everything will be fine. I'm going to get you out of here."

"I wouldn't want to go without you."

"Don't be stupid. I can't protect you forever." He stared down at his wrists; Laszlo didn't like to look at them. The veins on Florian's wrists looked swollen and bruised, like they were ready to burst. He even bled sometimes. There was a mark kind of like it on the back of his neck, too. Laszlo had one, as well, and it hurt when he got upset. He didn't even like to think about it. "Especially not from myself."

"It's okay. I'll stay with you." Laszlo hugged him.

"You always were an idiot. You'll just end up like me."

"I don't care." Florian sighed and put an arm around him, frowning.

After that night, Florian was gone most of the time, and He was always around. It was alright, though. Florian always was bad at keeping promises, anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Uncle Laszlo? Why are you holding your neck?" Laszlo nearly jumped out of his skin.

"Nathanyel! You're good at sneaking up on people." Nathanyel sat down next to him and have him a scrutinizing look. Those eyes...

"What's wrong with your neck?"

"It's nothing."

"Hmph." Nathanyel scowled at him and leaned forward, narrowing his eyes. Laszlo nearly laughed aloud; the boy was so expressive, it was difficult not to know what he was thinking.

"Alright, then. Let me put it this way: I'll tell you what's wrong with my neck when you tell me what's wrong with yours." Nathanyel took a deep breath and held it, then puffed out his cheeks. "I see. You don't know, then, do you?" Laszlo reached out and slapped his cheeks, causing the air to exit with a rather rude sound. "Well, same here." He stood up and brushed the dirt off the back of his robes. "Come on inside, now. It's getting dark."

Laszlo walked into the house, but Nathanyel didn't follow him. He decided not to push the issue. Nathanyel had a lot to think about, after all.

--------Nathanyel-------

Nathanyel wiped some sweat out of his eyes, then continued punching the wooden target Shinji had set up. He was going to improve, no matter what. All he had to do was practice and work hard. Uncle Laszlo had said that the stronger he got, the better he'd be at controlling himself. He wanted that. "Nathanyel!" Uncle Laszlo was standing by the back door to the house, watching him. "Come inside, now! It's time for dinner!" Nathanyel just kept punching. "Come on! Even Olivia's done for the day!" He tried to shut out the noise and keep going. "Nathanyel!" He wasn't going to stop. He was going to make himself into someone to be proud of. He was going to make Uncle Laszlo and Shinji and Lucius and Severus and Olivia all proud of him. He wasn't going to fuck things up anymore.

"Nathanyel!" Uncle Laszlo caught his next punch. "What's gotten into you? Stop this and come inside for dinner."

"No!" Nathanyel yanked his arm out of Uncle Laszlo's grip and continued punching the target. "I'm not stopping! I'm not going to give up."

"I never said you had to." Uncle Laszlo stopped him again. "But you're going to push yourself too hard if you don't at least get something to eat. I don't want you getting worn out."

"I don't care." Nathanyel tried to shake him off, but it wasn't as easy as before.

"Do you want a fight? Is that it?" Nathanyel stopped struggling and frowned down at his feet. "Why won't you rest?"

"I... I need to get stronger. Like you said. I need to train and get better." Uncle Laszlo paused for a moment, then let go of him and stepped back.

"Oh?" He nodded.

"I am tired. But more than that, I'm tired of messing up all the time. I'm tired of making mistakes and making people ashamed of me. I don't want... To be ashamed of myself." He took a deep breath and started punching again. "I want to be strong. I want to be confident. I want to be someone that people can be proud of. I want to be proud of myself. That's all." Uncle Laszlo watched him for a very long time before answering.

"...Alright. Come inside whenever you're ready." and he smiled, and looked very proud.

Nathanyel punched a little harder after that.

---------------

"Hey, Nathanyel." He looked up from his miso ramen to see Olivia standing next to him. "I thought you already ate?"

"I'm eating again," he replied. "Need to keep up my strength." She sat down next to him and watched him eat for a bit. "Something wrong?" He was getting a bit annoyed.

"You're improving really quickly," she replied. He shrugged. "I'm serious. When I say quick, I mean quick." Nathanyel raised an eyebrow and stuffed more noodles in his mouth. "What's with you lately?"

"What do you mean?" He raised the bowl to his mouth and gulped down the broth.

"You're acting like a prick."

"Who's acting like a prick?" He grinned.

"Don't be an arse." She scowled at him.

"I'm not being a prick, I'm just getting involved in my training. Is there something wrong with that?"

"No."

"You don't see me calling you a bitch every time you toss a kunai my way."

"I do not toss, I throw." Nathanyel just snorted. "Shut it." He liked teasing Olivia; she got angry so easily. Kind of like Severus. It made Nathanyel miss him a little bit less.

"Alright, let's go spar."

---------------

Nathanyel bit his lip, hard, and tightened his fists. He needed to find a way to calm himself down. "You're shaking," Olivia pointed out needlessly.

"I noticed!" Nathanyel took a few deep breaths, but it didn't exactly help.

"Don't worry about it," she advised. "This tournament isn't anything too serious. It's against the rules to kill your opponent, you know." That didn't comfort him. "And you won't be fighting anyone above your level."

"What?" Nathanyel didn't really know much about the tournament.

"There are different ranks that the fighters are grouped into. From the top, it's: S, A, B, C, and D. I'm in B, and you're in C."

"So we're not fighting together?"

"No." That just made him feel worse. "But like I said, killing's not allowed. After all, this tournament is mostly just around for tradition. My mother's side of the family's been participating for years."

"She's in it this year, right?"

"Yeah, S rank." She grinned. Nathanyel gulped.

"So I'm not facing anyone too strong, right?" Olivia rolled her eyes.

"You need to be more confident in yourself. You're good, but you'll never win if you don't think you can. It's a psychological thing."

"Oh."

"Look on the bright side! At least you're not D rank. That would be embarrassing." She nodded her head towards a group of people nearby. "Just a bunch of kids."

"Er... A lot of them look my age." She snorted.

"You're stronger than them."

"But... They've probably been training a lot longer than I have."

"It doesn't matter." he glared at her. "For them, I meant." Nathanyel sighed. "You've trained harder, anyway."

"...I'm as good as dead."

"How many times do I have to tell you? There's no killing in this tournament."

"I meant figuratively." She wasn't satisfied with that.

"You'll be fine! Stop worrying!" Somehow, though, Nathanyel knew there was something to worry about.

--------Laszlo-------

Laszlo rubbed his eyes as he put another pot of tea on the table. He was sitting on the porch outside, watching Nathanyel train. The stars were out already, but he didn't look like he was about to stop anytime soon. Laszlo yawned and looked down at his tea. He knew Nathanyel was troubled by what had happened at the tournament, so he's been meaning to talk to him.

Which was why he'd been sitting outside for six hours straight. He always had been the worst sort of coward. But it was something he had to do.

So, he set down his tea, got up, and made his way over to where Nathanyel was practicing with throwing knives. "Nathanyel... We need to talk."

"Later." Laszlo could only thank his experience with Florian for his minute knowledge of how to deal with Nathanyel's problem.

"Not later. Now." He caught Nathanyel's wrist and waited.

"...Fine." Laszlo let him go.

"Come sit and have tea with me. You look tired."

"I'm alright."

"Please." He hesitated.

"Sure." So they sat.

"It's not your fault, you know."

"If I can't control myself, then it's my own fault," he snapped.

"Is this how you always talk to people who try to help you?" There was silence after that. They just sipped their tea and watched each other. Finally, Nathanyel broke the silence.

"Is this how you always carry a conversation?"

"I assure you, I'm laughing on the inside."

"Hmph." Laszlo knew he was doing badly, so he just went for it.

"There's something I need to tell you."

"...It's alright. I understand if you want me to go." Nathanyel frowned down at his tea. "I don't blame you."

"That's not it."

"Is it about the tournament? Because I was disqualified?"

"I told you that wasn't your fault."

"So then whose fault was it? If I was disqualified for malicious intent, one would think it was my fault."

"Nathanyel..."

"So I almost killed someone and it wasn't my fault?"

"No. It wasn't." Nathanyel just scowled at him. "It's partly my fault. The bandages I gave you... To wrap around your arms... They have wards on them. But I didn't make the wards strong enough. And I entered you in that tournament when I should have known you weren't ready."

"So you're disappointed in me?"

"No, of course not. You did very well, except for the insane killing rampage part." He grinned, and Nathanyel hesitantly smiled back. "But you know... This all started with your grandfather." The smiled fell off his face when Laszlo said that. "You... Might not like to hear this, but..." He took a deep breath. "You're so much like Florian was." Nathanyel didn't look happy at all. "It's almost like... You're turning out how he should have." Laszlo was starting to think that it might be a little too early to talk about it, from the look on his face.

"I don't want to be like him," he whispered.

"I know. You're not him, Nathanyel, you're... Yourself. But what's happening to you... The same thing happened to your father."

"No."

"Yes. And something similar to me, as well." Then he showed Nathanyel the mark on his neck.

"It doesn't look like mine." Laszlo nodded as he turned back around.

"But Florian's looks like yours." There was silence.

"I don't want to turn into that." Nathanyel was shaking.

"Neither did Florian." He looked frightened. "Listen, Nathanyel. I brought you here to do what I can to stop it. You've been doing excellent with your physical training, but you need more mental discipline. Otherwise..."

"I know."

"I'm sorry. I never wanted something like this to happen again." He didn't know quite what to say next. Nathanyel was progressing so quickly... It was scary. "Are you... Having dreams? About water?"

"...Yes. Blue water. And wolves."

"And... Anything that... Happens?"

"You mean like premonitions?" Laszlo nodded. "I... No."

"I... Well, just don't worry. You won't turn out like Florian." Not if he could help it, at least. "I promise." He hoped it was one he could keep.

"U-Uncle Laszlo... Why...?"

"I don't need a reason." Slowly, Nathanyel nodded. Then, he stood up, walked away, and continued training. Laszlo didn't want to just leave it at that. "Hey. Can I join you?"

"Alright." Well... It was a start.

--------Nathanyel-------

"One... Two... Three... Four..."

"You're doing it wrong."

"Shut up." Nathanyel flicked Olivia's forehead and resumed his pull-ups.

"Oi! Dad!" Uncle Laszlo adjusted his glasses as he raised his eyebrows. "When's Shinji getting here?"

"Your mother is going to be with you today."

"Why?"

"Because she's going to teach you about seals." Olivia snorted.

"Seals?"

"It'll be a good lesson." It was then that Aunt Tsuki joined them. The only thing about her teaching them was that she didn't speak much English. In fact, she knew about as much English as Nathanyel knew Japanese. It was a good thing Uncle Laszlo was there to translate.

It actually did turn out to be a good lesson. "Seals take mental concentration to activate, so you'll have to increase your meditation time." Olivia wasn't too fond of that suggestion. "When used properly, they can be very effective. However, as with all things, their power depends upon your power."

"Borrrrring," Olivia yawned.

"Boring, but useful."

By the end of the lesson, Nathanyel finally had one thing that he was better than Olivia at. It was a very good feeling.

---------------

Nathanyel gulped, hard. Uncle Laszlo had signed him up for another tournament, and he was afraid of a disaster like the last one. It also didn't help that there were some people around who recognized him and gave him a rather wide berth. "Ignore it," Olivia ordered.

"Hm." Shinji nodded; he'd come with them, just in case.

"You'll be fine. You've improved since last time. We signed you up for B rank in this one, actually." Nathanyel was ready to strangle her.

"You what? I'm not as good as you are!"

"I know. But you've got potential."

"I'm dead."

"Well... Look at it this way. It's an opportunity to grow!"

"I'll kill you!" Some of the surrounding people edged away from him. "I'm going to get the shit beaten out of me, I know it."

"You won't. Don't be such a nervous Nellie."

"That's a stupid phrase."

"You're stupid. You know you'll be okay."

"What if I won't?"

"Oh well." She shrugged.

"How very encouraging."

---------------

Nathanyel was very relieved once the tournament was through. He'd been quite successful, in his opinion, since nothing truly horrible had happened. Uncle Laszlo's strengthened wards must have worked. Olivia was very disappointed, though, since he'd only finished tenth out of thirteen. "I beat three people, didn't I?" Nathanyel grumbled.

"But you lost! Lost!" He shrugged.

"Oh well."

"You are so out of it." She walked away, frowning. Nathanyel turned back to his ramen, thankful to have some time to himself. Well, not really to himself. He never had that anymore.

"You're boring," He growled, crossing his arms and watching Nathanyel slurp noodles. "You never do anything worth being a part of." Nathanyel ignored Him. "You never even do anything worth witnessing."

"I sure love ramen," Nathanyel proclaimed loudly.

"I want to taste blood," He hissed. "I need it." He reached out, baring his teeth.

"Nathanyel, are you in here?" Uncle Laszlo called out. Nathanyel blinked, looking around; He was gone.

"Yes."

"Ah, good, I've been looking for you." Uncle Laszlo sat down next to him, looking slightly worried. "Were you talking to someone?"

"I..." Nathanyel wanted to lie. "I..." But he couldn't. "I can hear... I can see... It." He didn't want to say anything more.

"...Oh. Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about." Uncle Laszlo seemed troubled.

"Do you know what's happening? What's going on?" Nathanyel waited for an answer, but there was only silence. "Why? Where's It coming from?"

"You don't want to hear this."

"I do, I do."

"...It isn't... Real." Nathanyel blinked, not quite sure what that meant.

"What?"

"It's all in your head." No.

"No! No, it's not! I can see-"

"I know you can." Uncle Laszlo took a deep breath. "So could Florian."

"But... But... You mean... I'm mad? That's it, that's all?"

"That isn't all. It's... The things you can do are real. But... You've been seeing someone, right?" Nathanyel nodded. "Someone who looks like you?" He gulped. "That is you. It's just you."

"You're wrong."

"I'm not." Nathanyel was having trouble breathing. "Nathanyel... Calm down."

"I... I'm not insane!"

"I know you're not... But you need to know that you can control yourself." Nathanyel got up from the table. He didn't want to hear any more. He didn't want to talk. "Maybe it was too soon to tell you this."

"It's not true! I'm not mad, I know what I see!"

"Nathanyel, that's not all, you don't understand-"

"Yes I do!"

"Nathanyel-"

"I'm not mad!" He was bleeding.

"Obliviate!"

---------------

Nathanyel woke up with a pounding headache. He was on the floor, and Uncle Laszlo was kneeling over him. "...What happened?" He had a slightly panicked feeling in his chest, and there was something in the back of his mind that was nagging at him. Something important that he needed to remember.

"You collapsed. I think it might have been from the excitement of the tournament and your fatigue. Tell me, how are the wards holding up?"

"They're fine..." Nathanyel remembered eating ramen... And then He was there... Then everything went blank.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine."

"Good." Uncle Laszlo helped him up. "I'm glad."

"Yeah..."

"Do you want to finish your ramen?"

"...Alright..." But he knew there was something he was forgetting.

---------------

Nathanyel didn't want to go back. He knew what would be waiting for him. It wasn't that he was afraid, just that he wasn't stupid.

Well... Maybe a little afraid.

"Here we are." Uncle Laszlo smiled nervously down at him as they stood at the front door. He hadn't actually arrived at the house himself in a long time, so Nathanyel knew that there was something wrong... Something very wrong.

"What's going to happen?" He asked.

"Shh. You'll see." And they entered the house.

"Ah. Finally." Nathanyel narrowed his eyes as his father greeted them. "I've been waiting." The only audible sound was the tapping of his shoes against the floor as he approached. "How are you... Nathanyel?"

Nathanyel didn't answer.

"I see." He turned to Uncle Laszlo. "Was there any improvement?" Uncle Laszlo gave a single nod. "Excellent." He grinned at Nathanyel. "So all my hard work has not gone to waste." He crouched down, then, and took Nathanyel's wrists, examining them. "Bandages?"

"Yes," Uncle Laszlo murmured. "For the trip."

"Oh?" Nathanyel knew right away that he wasn't deceived. "So you're a liar, now, on top of being a coward?" Uncle Laszlo clenched his jaw. "It doesn't matter. Hard work always pays off in the end." He smiled pleasantly at Nathanyel. "Isn't that right, son?" Nathanyel held his tongue. "Come, now, you mustn't be so shy around your father."

Nathanyel didn't want any trouble. He just wanted to go up to his room and stay there until it was time to go back to school. However, things didn't seem to be going that way. His father appeared to be expecting something. Carefully, he made sure his arms and neck were covered.

"You must be smarter than I thought," his father commented blithely. "So... Let's see if you've really improved as much as I've heard." Warily, Nathanyel backed up. "I know you want to attack me." Yes, he did, but not when he was at a disadvantage. "I see the look in your eyes. You hate me, right?" He didn't answer. "You want to kill me, don't you?" He didn't know he was that transparent. "Come on. I won't stop you."

"Do it," Uncle Laszlo muttered.

It seemed he had no choice in the matter.

So he did it. He charged his father and punched as hard as he could; he was on the floor before he knew what had happened. "That was good." Nathanyel frowned and got up, then charged again. Once more, he was on his back. "I suppose I shouldn't have expected too much out of you."

Growling, Nathanyel stood again, and reached for the knife he'd carried with him on the trip back. He couldn't miss... It was an opportunity he couldn't pass up.

But he missed. The knife hit the wall, and he hit the floor. He pushed himself up onto his hands and knees, but something hit him hard in the ribs, and he fell again. "I suppose it's alright. For you at least."

"I'll kill you," he panted. "I'll kill you." The last thing he saw was a foot rushing at his face.

---------------

"...Lucius?"

"Get up. You've got to go to King's Cross, you know." Nathanyel cracked his eyes open, grinning.

"I knew you'd come."

"Stop acting like an idiot and get up. You're holding everyone up." Nathanyel pushed himself out of bed, wincing slightly at his sore ribs.

"I missed you." Lucius snorted. "Did you miss me?"

"Pff. Just get dressed." Nathanyel grinned; he knew Lucius would miss him.

"Are you coming to the station?"

"No. I'm here on other business. I just thought I'd make sure you weren't missing any limbs while I was at it." He swept his eyes over Nathanyel. "Everything seems to be in place."

"Thanks." He smiled, but Lucius just rolled his eyes.

"I need to get out of here, anyway. See you at Christmas, then."

"Bye, Lucius." Nathanyel managed to slip through Lucius' defenses and give him a short hug.

"I knew you wouldn't change too much."

"You'd be surprised."

"Hn." Lucius swept out of the room, grumbling. Nathanyel sighed.

"Oh well... I guess I'll always be a screw-up."

"You're pathetic," He muttered.