Another Prisoner, Another Professor

The first Defense Against the Dark Arts lesson.

"Are you sure you're all right, Harry?" Hermione asked as they headed off for Professor Black's class.

"Fine," Harry muttered. The last thing he needed was Malfoy overhearing Hermione and finding another excuse to jeer at him - not that Malfoy needed much of an excuse. The incident with Neville's potion, though it seemed to have gained Harry some respect from the other Gryffindors, had given Malfoy the perfect opportunity to taunt him loudly during lunch and give a repeat performance of his Harry-passing-out impression, to the delight of the entire Slytherin table.

The Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, its walls covered with smiling photographs of Lockhart during the previous year, had undergone a redecoration. The walls were hidden behind embroidered tapestries in royal blue, gold, crimson, and silver; the windows were all wide open, and Professor Black was standing at the front of the room, looking over some papers. "Hello," he said when he looked up, and smiled. "Everyone find a seat."

Parvati and Lavender promptly rushed for desks in the first row. Harry sat in the second, with Ron on his left and Neville on his right. Hermione sat in front of him, next to Lavender, and looked eager to begin taking notes.

Black began to pace the front of the room. "I understand that during your last year there was a dueling club started, which was taught by an incompetent professor and failed disastrously." Ron snorted. "Is it safe for me to assume that none of you have been properly trained to duel?"

There was a general murmur of agreement.

"All right, that's where we're starting." Black stopped his pacing and looked out at the class. "You, in the front row, with the long braid."

Parvati, who had been doodling something on a bit of parchment, looked up and blushed. "Me?"

"Yes, what's your name?"

"Parvati Patil." She exchanged looks with Lavender, who giggled.

"Couple of nutters," Ron muttered under his breath.

Black seemed unperturbed. "Parvati, yes, I had your sister earlier today. I want you to hold out your wand - yes, point it at the floor - and say Serpensortia, can you do that?"

"I - what does it do?"

"That sounds familiar," Harry whispered to Ron. "I've heard that somewhere before..."

"Ah," said Black. He had a roguish sort of grin on his face. "Half of dueling is the element of surprise. Now, concentrate and say, Serpensortia."

Parvati looked at Lavender, then stretched out her hand and pointed the tip of her wand at the floor just in front of Black. "Serpensortia."

An enormous golden snake seemed to burst from her wand like a spring being released; everyone shouted, and Neville jumped up onto the desk behind him. The snake wove its way around Black's feet and darted its tongue at his boots. "I've noticed several people in this castle seem to be afraid of snakes," Black said casually, watching the serpent slither off to the far corner of the room. Neville was still standing rigid on the desk with a look of terror on his face. "Therefore, this could make a very useful spell in a serious duel."

A duel, yes, that was where Harry had seen it before; it was the spell that Malfoy had used during the dueling club the previous year.

"Well, no wonder everyone's afraid of snakes!" Ron blurted out. Black tilted his head to look at him. "There was a bloody enormous one Petrifying the school last year!"

"Yes," Black replied. "But this one is far from a basilisk, I believe. In fact, I'm not even sure that it's poisonous."

"You're not sure it's poisonous? You're not sure?"

The snake turned from the corner and made its way down the aisle, its gilded scales gleaming in the light from the chandelier. It stopped at Harry's desk and flicked its tongue. I don't want anything to do with these humans, it said. I'm just hungry for a nice juicy rat.

"I don't think it's poisonous," Harry said.

Not poisonous, the snake replied. Just hungry.

"Ron, you left Scabbers back in the tower, didn't you?"

Black crouched down near Harry's desk to look at the snake. "Parvati, you wouldn't happen to want a new pet, would you?"

She looked horrified, her eyes wide. "Not a snake!"

"This illustrates my point exactly. This entire school, Slytherin House excluded, has had a particular terror of snakes ever since I was a student. I think you would all do well to capitalize on that fear in duels."

Hermione raised her hand; Black looked up, one of his fingers idly stroking the snake's back. "Hermione, was it?"

"Yes, Professor, and I was wondering - do you think we'll ever really need to duel someone? Isn't learning about dueling just likely to cause a lot of trouble, if people get into quarrels?"

"Damn," Ron moaned. "She's going to ruin it..."

"I suppose that's a possibility," Black said. He looked, Harry thought, completely unworried by the thought - and by the snake, which was now sliding over his wrist. "Dueling is a valuable skill, though not without its drawbacks. Would anyone like this snake?"

Seamus Finnigan started to raise his hand but apparently thought better of it.

"All right. Evanesco." The snake disappeared, and Black stood. "Well, we've got more to cover this class. Neville, you can sit back down again. Now, let me see...Locomotor Mortis, the Leg-Locker Curse. Are you familiar with that spell, Neville?"

"Yes," murmured Neville, who had suffered it in their first year.

"It's not the most effective thing possible in a duel, but I think you've all had enough excitement for one class. Besides, it works well as both an impediment and a distraction. Go ahead and try it out, Neville."

Neville looked up, startled. "Me?"

"Yes, you," Black replied, smiling slightly.

"On - on who, sir?"

Black's quick gray eyes searched the room. "Well, as no one looks very eager to volunteer...go ahead and try it on me." When Neville hesitated, he added, "Yes, you heard me, go ahead," and braced himself against the wall.

Neville took his wand from his pocket and pointed it at Black's legs, looking as though he expected to be in trouble at any minute. "Lo-Loco - "

"Start over, without the hesitation." Black leaned his head back, his long hair sliding on his shoulders. "A friend of mine stuttered once casting Orchideous and instead of a bouquet of flowers ended up with a deformed porcupine, which didn't go over too well with the girl he fancied." Parvati and Lavender giggled again, Lavender leaning forward in her seat and smiling broadly.

"They really couldn't get more obvious, could they?" Hermione whispered to Harry in a disgruntled voice.

"Locomotor Mortis!"

Black's legs snapped sharply together, but a second later he was standing normally again. "Not bad for a first try. We'll practice the Leg-Locker Curse for the rest of class. Neville, you can partner with Ron; Hermione, go with - you, in the third row by the aisle - "

"Seamus Finnigan, sir."

"Thank you. You, next to him, you're Dean Thomas, aren't you? Yes, you can partner with Lavender, which leaves Harry and Parvati. All right, everyone find a bit of floor in the back and take turns trying to curse each other."

Seamus was not happy about being pairing with Hermione; she continued to lock and re-lock his legs for the rest of the class, whereas he only managed to successfully curse her once towards the end. Ron and Neville each managed to lock each other's legs together twice. Dean and Lavender were both victorious more times than not, while Parvati seemed almost afraid to curse Harry.

"I'm not going to hold it against you, you know," he said after he'd caused her to fall over for the third time.

"All right, end of class!" Black called. "Please take a list of curses as you leave, I expect all of you to be able to successfully perform five of the fifteen by next class - yes, Dean, I'm going to be testing you - and I want you all to talk to me if you have substantial bruising, as I don't want Madam Pomfrey after my blood."

"Bit of a nutter about snakes, isn't he?" Ron said to Harry and Hermione as they headed down the corridor. "Maybe that's why he gets on with Hagrid, neither of them are too worried about students getting their heads bit off."

"I don't think it's that he isn't worried," Hermione said, stopping for a moment to rearrange her overflowing book bag. "I just think he's not more afraid of them than he is of anything else. I mean, it's a little silly when you think about it, isn't it? They're only snakes."

"I've got one word for you, Hermione," said Ron as they reached the stairs. "Pipes."