Every Guy has a Soft Spot for a Cat

Hello Draco and Harry,

I assume you are reading this together...and both of you in your jammies, how cute!

Yes, I have your dearest kitty, Harry Butterwick the Fourth (You don't my adding the Fourth do you? It sounds much more dignified.), but you must remember that he was mine to begin with. I had every right to take him back.

Sorry to have inconvenienced you in any way. I hope that we may all move on with our lives as best we can. HB the Fourth will be fine. I am very grateful to you for taking care of him. Thank you.

My sincerest thanks and apologies,

Mysterious Person

"What?" snapped Draco. "That's it? It's just over? No hidden clue to lead us onward?"

Harry frowned at the letter in silence.

Draco scowled. "The nerve of some people."

"This person is obviously mad," said Harry.

"That's the least insane I have ever heard them be!" Draco cried. "The letter...it sounds normal! Rational! Completely sensical!"

Harry shrugged. "I don't know... 'the Fourth' thing seemed rather strange to me."

"Oh come on. It does sound pretty damn dignified if you ask me!"

"You know what this means, don't you?" Harry gave Draco a meaningful look.

The blonde blinked. "What?"

A determined grin erupted on the Gryffindor's face. "A quest."

"A quest?" Draco looked confused.

"A quest," Harry repeated.

"I'm sorry. You'll have to elaborate. I'm afraid heroic missions aren't in the Slytherin line of work. I'm unfamiliar."

"We rescue HB the Fourth from the clutches of the previously mad, now quite sane catnapper."

Silence.

"As in...we go get him," Harry said.

"Oh."

The Gryffindor rolled his eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes at me!" Draco snapped.

Harry repeated the action.

"Don't!" The Slytherin's voice had become increasingly whiney.

"Do you ever shut up?" Harry groaned.

"Do you ever not suck?" Draco mimicked in return.

"I hate you."

"I hate you more."

They stood glaring at each other. Their bodies were a scant inch or so apart, breaths mingling in the darkness.

Harry's eyes wandered a moment, his thoughts drifting back to his dream. He turned away quickly. "Oh Merlin, no!"

Draco seemed perplexed. "What?"

"Nothing," Harry muttered. "Certainly not thinking about you naked..."

"What was that?"

Harry struggled to find a word that rhymed with naked. "I said...certainly want stinking about new bake...ed..."

"That makes no sense."

"Erm...you're pretty?"

The blonde perked up. "Oo, thank you."

That was not at all the direction Harry had wanted to go. "I didn't mean...er...crap...I..." He sighed in defeat. "You're welcome."

The Slytherin had a smirk very reminiscent of HB the Fourth's on his face. "So about this questical adventure of ours..."

Harry managed to turn around but continued to avoid Draco's eyes. "Yes?"

"I'm not so sure about it... Who would be going?"

Harry frowned. "Just the two of us."

The Slytherin was up to some sort of mischief. Harry could tell.

"Danger? Braverism? Swashbucklery?"

The Gryffindor was thoroughly confused. "I guess."

Draco picked nonexistent lint off his sleeve. "Then I have just one thing to say."

"What's that?"

A wicked grin appeared. "When do we leave?" He paused. "Oh, that and...I know you like my ass."

Harry stumbled back a bit in horror. "I--I like what? What makes you say that?" he stammered.

The Slytherin had started toward the door. "Because everyone does. I mean, look at it. It's pretty awesome."

Harry found himself studying the other boy's rear immediately. He had to admit...it was pretty awesome...as far as that kind of thing went.

Draco paused at the top of the stairs. "I'll see you tomorrow to plan all the daring do and such."

Harry nodded. "I promise you, Draco, we'll find HB the Fourth."

The Slytherin struck a triumphant pose--hands on hips, groin jutting out (much to Harry's discomfort), chin aimed high. "Soon it will all come to an end," he announced ominously. "Mission solved. Mystery accomplished.

Harry didn't even bother to correct the other boy as the blonde leapt down toward the common room with glee. "Oh boy."

He headed back to his bed and crawled in. It was at this moment that he began to wonder why none of his roommates had been woken by all the noise. It seemed strangely convenient...as if an author was writing a story about him and had not bothered to realize this detail until the end of the chapter.

Harry then realized that he had discovered far too much and went to sleep.