Questions and Answers

little_bird

Story Summary:
What happens when the past collides with the present and threatens to cast the Potters' and Weasleys' lives into disarray...

Chapter 54 - Awakening

Posted:
02/13/2011
Hits:
1,338


Hermione rubbed her gritty eyes, the tiny print of the enormous book in front of her beginning to swim and blur. 'Some things never really change, do they?'

Hermione's hands fell away from her face, and she blinked rapidly, clearing her vision. The figure leaning against the door frame coalesced into a tall, thin, woman, with a great deal of straggly blonde hair. Her slightly protuberant eyes were still dreamy, in spite of the shadows under them. 'Luna!' Hermione felt her face lift into a smile. 'How are you?'

Luna grinned and dropped into a chair. 'Exhausted. I've heard all of you talk for ages about it, and I should have paid more attention to you. But they're lovely, the boys.' She reached into her bag and pulled out a photograph. 'They look just like Rolf,' she said, holding it out to Hermione. A bit of the dreaminess vanished and Luna's gaze sharpened as she examined Hermione. 'You've looked better yourself,' she said with her characteristic bluntness.

'I'm fine,' Hermione murmured.

'That's not what I hear.' Luna wound her hair into a careless knot and jabbed her wand through it. 'You've completely stopped mentioning your mother in your letters, and Ginny's last letter said your mum was ill.'

'She is.'

'How ill is she? Ginny wouldn't say.'

'Dying and forgetting everyone and everything.' Hermione kept her answers terse. It kept other people from gratuitous displays of pity.

'Hmmm.' Luna slouched a little in the chair. She seemed to look through Hermione. 'And you're not terribly upset by the idea of your mum dying,' she stated.

Hermione's shoulders sagged a little. 'I could ask them to delay the inevitable, but I'm not. It's almost like someone's put Full Body-Bind curse on her mind. She doesn't remember me and barely remembers Ron, Rose, and Hugo. She forgot Dad died ages ago. I don't think she remembers how to read. And they have to bathe her, because if left to her own devices, she'll run the bath, but won't remember she hasn't actually gotten in it.' She gave Luna a wry, twisted smile. 'I'm a horrible person, aren't I?'

Luna shook her head. 'No, you're not. Just because someone can breathe and move around, it doesn't mean they're alive.'

'Mum's nothing like an Inferi,' Hermione objected.

'Of course she's not,' Luna said calmly. 'But the way you describe it, it's not as if she has any sort of life.' She paused for just a moment. 'I think you're more bothered by the fact you're not as upset as you think you should be.'

Hermione let her head fall to rest on her folded arms. She wasn't sure if she ought to laugh or cry, but she felt an insurmountable relief at being able to finally admit it out loud to someone. 'Yes...' She took several deep breaths, then lifted her head. 'How do you do that?' she asked.

Luna's head tilted slightly to one side, as she took in Hermione. 'It's a gift,' Luna said with a smile. 'But you said goodbye to your mother a long time ago, I think. You're just waiting now.' She leaned forward a bit. 'If you were truly upset, there would be a fortress of books on your desk right now, and not just one.'

Hermione tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear. 'Am I that transparent?'

'Oh, to people who know you. You always spent more time in the library at school if you were having a disagreement with Ron or Harry.' Luna motioned to Hermione's bag. 'And it's not even four in the afternoon, and you're ready to go home.' She shrugged. 'Mere observation.'

Hermione nodded and shifted the topic of conversation. 'I thought you weren't coming back to England until next summer.'

'We weren't, but Rolf finished his research early, and we thought we'd come home in time for the holidays. Try to find somewhere to live. We're staying with Daddy for the time being. Rolf and I decided to live in England full time, until the boys start Hogwarts. It was difficult enough just to get them here and I can't imagine trekking with them all over the world on research trips. When they're a bit older, we'll take them on short trips with us.'

Hermione felt her brows shoot up in surprise. 'What are you going to do in the meantime?'

'Revise Fantastic Beasts,' Luna replied promptly. 'That ought to take a good while. Rolf is somewhat attached to it. But it needs to be done. Hasn't been updated in years... Get with Dean to make an illustrated children's version of it. I'm not sure why it hasn't been done before.'

'Probably because some of the more dangerous creatures would frighten children,' Hermione said dryly.

'We'd leave out acromantulas,' Luna chuckled. 'And perhaps werewolves, but dragons will stay in.'

Hermione snorted. 'Hagrid would be very upset if you only have X and XX classified creatures in it.'

Luna nodded. 'Perhaps nobody will show him the book,' she said. 'After all, I've never told Daddy that Stubby Boardman wasn't Sirius Black...'

xxxxxx

Draco picked up the squashy ball from the table as he dropped into the chair. 'I told her... My wife. I told her about you.'

'How did it go?' Andrew flicked his wand and a glass of water appeared at Draco's elbow.

'She thought I was having an affair,' Draco muttered, fingers wrapped around the ball.

'That's a rather large leap to make,' Andrew observed.

'It wasn't,' Draco corrected. 'She's cognizant of my prior...' His mouth quirked in a moue of distaste. 'Indiscretions.'

Andrew frowned a little. 'Do you have a mistress now?'

'No. I severed that particular connection before I married Daphne.' Draco rolled the ball between his fingers. 'But Pansy made an unannounced visit to my mother's house last summer,' he murmured. 'First time I've been alone with her since a few days before my wedding fifteen years ago.'

'What is Pansy like?'

'She reminds me of my aunt Bellatrix,' Draco admitted, his lip curling. 'Now, at any rate. Didn't see it until I saw her last August, actually.' He picked up the glass of water and took a long sip. 'She's pretty, I suppose, if you like overblown women. Brittle. Tries too hard. She had her hands in my trousers, when a simple inquiry would have sufficed.'

'Did you like that?'

'Let's just say she didn't get much of a rise out of me,' Draco sighed.

'Did you want her to?'

'Sort of.' Draco began to methodically squeeze the ball. 'I don't like to let people touch me...' he stammered. 'Not since I got the...' He gestured to his left forearm. 'And Pansy wasn't one for the niceties associated with sex. She was strictly a shag and go kind of woman. But that evening, if she was touching me, then I wasn't invisible.' Draco gulped more water. 'No, not invisible - that's not the right word,' he corrected himself. 'Irrelevant.'

'Why do you think you're irrelevant?' Andrew let his pen still.

Draco let his eyes close. 'I'm not needed. My wife manages our son quite well without me. My mother doesn't need me for anything. When my father died, by the time I woke up the next morning, Mother and Daphne had already completed the arrangements between the two of them. And Daphne... she takes care of everything else. I'm just there.'

Andrew's eyes narrowed, as he contemplated Draco. 'Have you ever tried to do more than just be there?'

Draco shook his head. 'Why bother? I'll make a mess out of things, just like I always have.'

'That can't be true,' Andrew said. 'There must be something in your life you've done well.'

Draco looked down at the rug under his feet. 'Nothing.'

'And not even now?'

'No.'

Andrew set his notebook down and rested his elbows on his knees. 'The more you think you're a complete and utter failure at life, the greater the chance it will happen.'

'It always happens with me,' Draco muttered.

Andrew glanced at the small hourglass and stifled a sigh. 'Right. Time's up... But I'd like you to do something before you come back next time.'

'What?' Draco asked suspiciously.

'I want you to tell me one thing you can do, and do well.' Andrew managed to hide the grin playing around his mouth at the look of sheer terror on his patient's face. 'And you can do this. Nobody is absolute rubbish at everything they do. Not even you.'

xxxxxx

James stabbed at beef medallion on his plate and stuffed it whole into his mouth, ignoring his father's ostentatious throat-clearing meant to be hints. He swallowed with no small difficulty and reached for his glass of milk. 'Can I take Maya to see a film next week?'

Harry glanced at Ginny over the rims of his glasses. 'And where will you be doing this?' he asked idly, cutting his sprouts into small pieces.

'I was thinking London,' James said casually, a delicate flush coloring his cheeks.

'London, huh?' Ginny murmured. She shared another wordless look with Harry, then shook her head. 'Not until we meet Maya's parents.'

'You're joking!' James spluttered.

Harry gazed at Ginny thoughtfully, his brows knit. 'No... We've told jokes before, and, hang on... No, that was definitely not a joke.'

'There's a game in Falmouth next Friday,' Ginny mused. 'They're playing Appleby. We can all go to the game and stop by her parents' pub beforehand and meet them then,' she pronounced. 'You can bring Maya to the game, if - if - it's quite all right with her parents.'

'And there's no way we're going to let you run about London by yourself,' Harry told James. 'You're barely fifteen.'

'I won't be alone,' James retorted. 'Maya will be with me.'

'You'll go with Teddy,' Harry ordered. 'And if he can't go, your mum or I will go with you.'

James gasped, his mouth falling open, working soundlessly like a fish. 'That's... I...'

'That's the deal, James,' Ginny said. 'Teddy doesn't have to see the same film you do, but you're not to try and distract him so you can slip away. I will make sure that you don't see the right side of a broom until June if you do that.'

'Can she really do that?' Lily whispered to Al.

All shrugged. 'I'm not sure, but I don't want to be the one that finds out,' he replied.

'Fine...' James muttered, molding his mound of mashed potatoes into peaks.

'Make sure you owl Maya by Monday, so her parents know to expect us before the game.' Harry reached over and ruffled James' hair. 'Don't worry about it,' he said. 'We'll save the bare bum baby photos for later.'

'That does not make me feel better,' James mumbled into his potatoes. He pushed his plate away. 'May I be excused...?'

'But you've hardly touched your dinner,' Ginny objected.

'I'm not hungry,' James muttered sullenly. He shoved his chair away from the table, and carried his plate to the sink, all but dropping the plate into it.

Harry waited until James' footsteps on the staircase faded, then turned to Lily. 'Don't even think about asking to do that until you're forty,' he informed her just as James' bedroom door slammed shut.

Lily's eyes widened, and her face paled. Her head whipped around to Ginny so fast, the end of her plait smacked Al in the nose. 'Really, Mum?' she said fearfully.

'No, Lily,' Ginny sighed. 'That was a joke. But you're not going out alone until you're of age.' She eyed Al, calmly eating his dinner. 'Do you have anything you'd like to add to the discussion?' she asked.

Al contemplated the bowl of sprouts in front of him, and shook his head. 'No, I'm all right.'

'Brilliant,' Harry muttered. 'When is Scorpius getting here?'

'Ought to be here by lunchtime on Thursday,' Al said. He ran the tines of his fork through his potatoes for a moment. 'He, erm... Said something sort of odd before we came back...' Neither Harry, nor Ginny said anything, but waited expectantly. Al poked at his sprouts for a moment. 'He wondered if he... could stay here... if... he...' Al trailed off, looking miserable. 'If he ran away from home,' he muttered.

Al saw his parents exchange another silent look, and wondered how they could have an entire conversation without saying a word. 'Al,' Ginny began gently. 'Is Scorpius planning on running away?'

Al gazed at first his mother, then father, and shrugged. 'Not now. As far as I know...'

'Would he tell you?' Harry asked.

Al shifted uncomfortably in his chair and shoveled a forkful of potatoes into his mouth. 'I think so,' he admitted, swallowing. 'I hope so.'

Harry heaved a sigh, remembering his pledge of nearly a year ago to Ginny. 'He can stay with us,' he said quietly. 'But you'll have to understand if we at least owl his mother to let her know he's all right.'

'You don't sound very happy about it,' Al said to his plate.

Harry laid his fork down, and gently tipped Al's face up with an index finger. 'Everybody needs a place to run away to from home. Especially if things become unbearable. It will be fine.'

Ginny waited a few minutes, allowing the underlying tension to dissipate. 'Do you have any homework for the holiday?'

Lily nodded. 'Binns is making us write eight inches of parchment on the goblin rebellion of 1612,' she piped up, relieved that conversation had returned to something resembling normal.

'Is he still making you lot do that assignment?' Ginny snorted incredulously.

'I did it,' Al offered. 'My first year.'

'So did I,' Harry grumbled.

'It's a rite of passage,' Ginny said, with a smile.

'So is catching up on your sleep during Binns' class,' Harry added, ruefully. 'What about you, Al?'

'Essay on hinkypunks, and read the chapter dealing with werewolves.' He ate a few sprouts. 'Can I sit in the scouts' box on Friday? I need to add another team to my research for my Quidditch class.'

'You don't want to sit with us in the press box?' Ginny asked.

'No offense, Mum, but you lot talk too much,' Al grumbled. 'Can't hear the announcer because someone's yammering about who Aiden Lynch tried to feel up last month. And can I just say "ewww"? There are enough disgusting things in the universe without thinking about Aiden Lynch's hand up some lady's shirt. He's ancient!'

'He's got a point, Gin,' Harry told her, Summoning an apple crumble, and dishing it into bowls that he handed round the table. 'I've often wondered how you managed to write anything about the game.'

Ginny poured tea into a cup and glared at Harry over the rim as she sipped it. 'We happen to be talking about the game,' she retorted.

'I didn't think Aiden Lynch played anymore,' Lily interjected in bemusement.

'He doesn't,' Harry said. 'He hasn't played since before James was born. Had a roving hand then, too.' This time, the look he sent Ginny, made Al and Lily give each other confused looks of their own.

Al coughed a little, trying to regain his parents' attention. 'So do I have to have someone sit in the scouts' box with me?' he asked, his voice loud to his own ears.

Harry blinked, breaking eye contact with Ginny, his ears slightly pink. 'Yeah. I'll go with you. Get a chance to actually watch the game for once,' he said teasingly.

Lily, who had been determinedly working her way through her meal, suddenly spoke. 'Why do we have to have someone with us all the time? We've never had that before... We used to run all over the Harpies' stadium before, when Mum took us to games... Couldn't do anything, without someone running off and yakking to Mum.'

The next look Harry and Ginny gave each other held a note of worry. 'It's just now you're capable of getting into so much more trouble,' Ginny said lightly. 'Now that you have wands.'

Lily's round eyes narrowed suspiciously, but she didn't argue. She had a feeling it wouldn't end well for her.

xxxxxx

Harry rolled his sleeves down and buttoned the cuffs as he walked up the stairs after dinner. James' bedroom door was still firmly shut. He opened the door with a tap of his wand. 'Mind if I have a word?'

James was lying on his bed, glaring at the ceiling. 'You're going to talk to me whether I want you to or not.'

'I'm going to let that bit of attitude slide,' Harry said dryly, grabbing the chair from James' desk. He straddled it, folding his arms across the back. 'It's not that your mum and I don't trust you,' he said awkwardly. 'It's just that you're barely fifteen. And I know your mum and I have given you a great deal of latitude before, so I'm sure it feels like we're smothering you.' Harry paused, and took a deep breath. 'How much do you know about girls?' he blurted, in a strangled voice.

'I know where babies come from, if that's what you're asking,' James huffed.

'Well, actually, I was more interested in if you knew how to keep that from happening.'

James shrugged. 'I got the basics in primary school the last year I was there.'

'Right...' Harry rearranged his arms. 'First of all, you're too young to be shagging anyone, unless you're taking matters into your own hands, and in that case, you ought to clean up afterwards...'

James' face erupted into a flaming blush. 'Erm... Yeah... Learned that one at school,' he muttered. 'In the dormitory...'

'Of course,' Harry choked, feeling a blush creep up his own face. 'So anyway... You're too young to... well, you know... And if you're too young, your mum and I are definitely far too young to be grandparents. But at some point, and probably sooner than I would want, you're going to, and I'll sleep better if I know you know how to protect yourself and your girl... '

'All right...' James muttered warily.

Harry took a deep breath. 'First of all, there is a charm. They don't teach it at school, and it's not very effective, because you need to cast it right before... And well, if you're not really concentrating on it, it doesn't work very well...'

One of James' brows rose slowly. 'Is that how...?' he asked, making a gesture that encompassed his bedroom, and Al and Lily's as well.

'No,' Harry replied quickly. 'But it is how your grandparents had your uncles Percy, George, Fred, Ron, and your mum.'

James' face scrunched in disgust. 'Ew.'

'I'll teach you the incantation later,' Harry promised. 'There are also Muggle methods that do work quite well, but you have to use them every time.'

'And sex is supposed to be something that's fun?'

'That's what they say,' Harry said dryly. He waved his wand and a banana floated between them then pulled a small, foil-wrapped square from his pocket. 'This is a condom...'

xxxxxx

James repressed the urge to wipe his hands down his jeans. After several attempts, Harry was finally satisfied that he could put the condom on the banana. James poked at the now-bare banana with a cautious forefinger. 'Erm... You're not going to expect anyone to eat that, are you?' he asked. 'You'll Vanish it, right?'

Harry took in James' green face and obligingly jabbed his wand at the much-abused piece of fruit. It disappeared. 'Listen, Jemmy... Nothing is one hundred percent effective. Well, aside from not doing anything in the first place.' A brief vision of Ron and Lavender from their sixth year flashed through Harry's brain. 'And try to do this with someone you really like, and aren't just using to get someone else's attention.'

James nodded, feeling slightly queasy. 'Are we done...?'

'Yeah. And if you have questions...'

James nodded. 'Yeah.'

Harry squeezed James' shoulder. 'If it makes you more comfortable, you can talk to Teddy.'

'Okay,' James said faintly, still looking as if he was going to throw up. He slid across his bed, his back resting against the wall. 'Night, Dad...'

Harry got up and replaced the chair at the desk. 'Good night, Jemmy.' He reached across the bed and brushed his fingers over James' head, then left, feeling as if he had just shredded the last remnants of James' childhood. 'Happy-bloody-Christmas,' he muttered to himself.