Rating:
PG
House:
Schnoogle
Characters:
Harry Potter Hermione Granger Ron Weasley
Genres:
Humor Crossover
Era:
Multiple Eras
Spoilers:
Prizoner of Azkaban
Stats:
Published: 07/02/2004
Updated: 07/02/2004
Words: 2,913
Chapters: 1
Hits: 1,552

An MST

Lexi

Story Summary:
What happens when the Marauders, Harry, Hermione and Ron are thrown into a room, together? What if there was a muggle girl and a paperback book waiting for them?

Chapter 01

Posted:
07/02/2004
Hits:
1,552
Author's Note:
I'd like to thank my Betas for being so patient! Hope you like!


1996

"Do you have any idea why we were called here, of all places?" Harry Potter asked his two best friends, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley.

"No clue," Ron answered his freckles sparkling on his cheeks and his hair so red it looked as if it were on fire.

"Same," Hermione chimed in, her bushy brown hair bouncing behind her as they strolled down the corridors to the Room of Requirement. They were two floors away.

1979

"Why in the hell were we called to the Room of Requirement?" James Potter asked his three best friends, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew.

"N-no cl-clue," squeaked short and fat Peter, his beady black eyes watering as they always did.

"Same," handsome Sirius agreed. His long black hair fell gracefully as he and his friends strode through the hallways of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Remus shrugged his broad shoulders. His blonde hair that was speckled with brown made him look pretty good looking to most of the girls, but not like Sirius or James did.

2004

Taz tapped her foot impatiently, waiting for her guests to arrive. She tossed her head back to get her blonde hair out of her blue eyes. She held a paperback book in her folded arms. Just as she began to pace the Room of Requirement, the door opened. Three Hogwarts students stepped in, a girl with bushy hair and two handsome boys. Just as they had stepped inside and closed the door it opened again. This time, revealing four boys. The first three gazed awkwardly. Taz coughed, trying to break the silence. Apparently no one had noticed her, for they all looked at her with the same confound expression. Taz grinned.

"No interruptions please, at least not until I am through. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter, please, meet Harry, Hermione, and Ron. They are from the future as am I. They are from 1996, I am from 2004. Now why are they here and why should you care about them? Well, for one, James, wonder why Harry looks exactly like you? He's your son. Sirius, your Godson. Remus, your friend and former student, Peter, well, you'll find out later. They know most of your future selves, but not all. You will find out more about them in this book I have here with me that I have brought from the future muggle world," she said, taking a deep breath. "All seven of you will read this book in my company. Don't worry; time outside of these doors has stopped until you are finished with this book. You can make your next class, Hermione and Remus. You three," she pointed to Harry, Ron, and Hermione, "I need to speak with you in private. The rest of you may wait here and chat." Taz led the three to a far corner of the room.

"I guess you're pretty surprised?" Taz asked them all, Harry in particular.

"What is that book? Why'd you bring us here? Why does that rat have to be here?" Harry asked a little shaky.

"It's about your third year. I thought it would be easier for them to understand with you all here and I thought you might want to meet them. There was no way I couldn't keep Peter away--they insisted he come and if he couldn't come, they wouldn't. Does that answer most of your questions?" Taz answered.

"Ever thought of what changing the past could do to the present--future---past. . . whatever 1996 is to now!?" a frustrated Hermione inquired in a puzzled way. Taz laughed.

"Yes. It would be no different then how it is--think about it. The only difference would be that James and Lily were alive, but you have to realize, the Marauders might not believe us!" Taz shot back. Hermione sighed.

"Alright then. I guess we could always modify their memories if anything went wrong."

"Exactly," Taz replied.

"Fine with me," Harry piped up, though he sounded a little hoarse.

"Shall we begin?" Taz asked.

"Unless they have any questions," Ron finally spoke. The four of them went back to the Marauders.

"Do you have any questions?" Taz asked straight out.

"Just two," Remus answered simply.

"How do we know we can trust you?" Peter asked. His voice calmer than Harry had ever heard it. Taz and Hermione had to hold Ron and Harry back.

"Why so unsure?" Harry snarled.

"Whoa there, hot shot!" Sirius calmed. Harry stopped struggling, as did Ron.

"Prove it," James shot back, his eyes narrowing at the two boys.

"You want proof?" Harry chuckled, "I'll give you proof. Ask me any question about you four, any question at all."

"What do we call ourselves?" James asked, crossing his arms.

"Easy, the Marauders," Harry smirked.

"Our nicknames are . . .,"James tried once more, a little shocked that he knew the answer.

"Moony is Remus, Wormtail is Peter, Padfoot is Sirius, and Prongs is James."

"One final question: What is this?" James pulled out a blank piece of parchment.

"Give it here," Harry ordered. He stuck out his hand and James reluctantly gave him the parchment. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good!" Harry chanted as he pointed a thin wooden wand tip to the parchment. A map then appeared.

"Ok, we trust you. For the time being," James answered.

"Are we going to read that book or not?" Remus asked.

"Yes. I'll read first." Taz answered. She opened the book.

"Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban"

The Marauders shuddered.

"Wait! There's more proof!" Remus suddenly jumped, "Harry Potter. Harry, what's your middle name?"

"James," Harry said simply.

"Huh?" James said stupidly.

"And James's middle name is Harry. Cool!" Sirius said. Hermione and Taz muttered something under their breath that sounded oddly like 'boys'.

CHAPTER ONE: OWL POST

Harry Potter was a highly unusual boy in many ways. For one thing, he hated the summer holidays more than any other time of the year.

"Have to agree with you there, kid. Holidays are the worst!" Sirius said shaking his head.

"You're telling me!" Harry muttered.

For another, he really wanted to do his homework but was forced to do it in secret, in the dead of night. And he also happened to be a wizard.

"What's so weird about that?" James asked.

"You're forgetting that this is a Muggle book!" Remus and Hermione said in unison. Sirius and Ron shook their heads.

"Oh, great! Now we have two! One was bad enough!" Sirius and Ron shuddered.

"Terrific! Now we have these two to worry about as well!" James and Harry sighed.

"Like father, like son," Taz and Hermione laughed.

"I feel left out," Peter pouted.

It was nearly midnight, and he was lying on his stomach in bed, the blankets drawn right over his head like a tent, a flashlight in one hand and a large leather-bound book(A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot) propped open against the pillow. Harry moved the tip of his eagle-feather quill down the page, frowning as he looked for something that would help him write his essay,--
"Witch burning in the fourteenth century was completely pointless--discuss. I hated that essay, though Wendelin the Weird was pretty cool," Remus finished.

"Oh, Wendelin the Weird was awesome!" Sirius exclaimed.

"I must agree with you there!" James grinned. Taz, Ron, and Harry nodded vigorously.

"She was okay," Hermione shrugged.

"Okay?" Taz, Ron, and Harry repeated.

"Yeah, pretty much," Hermione shrugged again.

The quill paused at the top of a likely-looking paragraph. Harry pushed his round glasses up the bridge of his nose,--

Everyone looked at James and Harry.

"What?" they asked. They both pushed their glasses up to their eyes.

"Geeks?" Ron whispered to Sirius.

"Uh-huh!" Sirius nodded.

"I heard that!" James and Harry yelled at them.

"Just joking, mate!" Sirius calmed.

moved his flashlight closer to the book, and read:

Non-magic people--

"Oh! Oh! I can recite the whole paragraph!" James volunteered, "Non-magic people (more commonly known as Muggles) were particularly afraid of magic in medieval times, but not very good at recognizing it. On the rare occasion that they did catch a real witch or wizard, burning had no effect whatsoever. The witch or wizard would perform a basic Flame Freezing Charm and then pretend to shriek with pain while enjoying a gentle, tickling sensation. Indeed, Wendelin the Weird enjoyed being burned so much that she allowed herself to be caught no less than forty-seven times in various disguises. I told you!"

"Uh---he's right!" Taz stared in awe. James gave Sirius a high-five.

"You know, I just realized something," Remus said with a puzzled look on his face, "If Harry is James's son, then why does he have to do his homework in secret? That doesn't sound like James or anyone he would marry. Who is your mum, Harry?" Harry turned a chalky white.

"Er---it's a secret. You'll find out in a minute," Harry said.

Harry put his quill between his teeth and reached underneath his pillow for his ink bottle and a roll of parchment. Slowly and very carefully he unscrewed the ink bottle, dipped his quill into it, and began to write, pausing every now and then to listen, because if any of the Dursleys heard---

"Dursley? Where have I heard that name before? Hey, and shouldn't it be 'Potters', not 'Dursleys'?" James asked.

heard the scratching of his quill on their way to the bathroom, he'd probably find himself locked in the cupboard under the stairs for the rest of the summer.

"I wouldn't let that happen!" James exclaimed, "Who are these Dursleys any way? I know I have heard that name before, somewhere!"

The Dursley family of number four, Privet Drive, was the reason Harry never enjoyed his summer holidays. Uncle Vernon--

"Oh, God! I'm related to these people now!" James cried.

"You aren't the only one," Harry groaned.

"Poor Harry and James!" Ron and Sirius sighed.

Aunt Petunia--

"I know where I've heard that name before! Lily Evans sister, Petunia, is dating a guy, Vernon Dursley!" James yelled, starting to stand up.

"And how, exactly, do you know this?" Hermione asked.

"We have our ways," Sirius gave a sneaky grin.

and their son, Dudley,

"Dudley," Remus snorted. They all laughed.

were Harry's only living relatives.

"What?" the Marauders asked in shock.

"There has to be some kind of catch," Remus muttered, his brow furrowed.

They were Muggles, and they had a very medieval attitude toward magic. Harry's dead parents, who--

"H-he's not dead!" Sirius yelled. A few tears ran down Sirius's cheek.

"Calm down, Sirius," James said. Remus had paled and Peter had started muttering to himself. Harry glared at Peter, but only Sirius noticed.

who had been a witch and wizard themselves, were never mentioned under the Dursley's roof. For years, Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon had hoped that if they kept Harry as downtrodden as possible, they would be able to squash the magic out of him.

"That's impossible to do to a Potter!" Harry and James said crossing their arms. Everyone else laughed.

"Stop that!" Harry and James said to each other. "No! You stop! Argh!"

"Harry, let your poor father be," Hermione giggled.

"'Poor father'?" James and Harry repeated.

"James, that's awfully cruel," Sirius grinned.

"'Cruel'?" Harry and James said, "Ok, I'm getting tired of this! Ugh!"

"Ok, I'll silence one of you and the other, well, the other just say whatever," Remus sighed, "Silencio!" He flicked his wand in James direction.

"Yes!" Harry jumped up, "I'm free! Ha, ha!" he pointed at James. Hermione flicked her wand. "Hey!" Harry's mouth moved but no sound came out. James now jumped up and laughed silently in Harry's face. Everyone else laughed along with him.

"Take it off!" Harry and James mouthed. Remus sighed and muttered the counter curse.

To their fury, they had been unsuccessful.

"Ha ha ha ha ha!" James said in a sing-song voice.

These days they lived in terror of anyone finding out that Harry had spent most of the last two years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The most they could do, however, was to lock away Harry's spellbooks, wand, cauldron, and broomstick--

"You play Quidditch?" Sirius asked excitedly, James looking just as eager.

"Are you kidding? 'Course I do!" Harry answered.

"What position?" James asked, leaning forward.

"Seeker, you?" Harry replied getting excited.

"Chaser, and Sirius here is a Beater," James said.

"Ron's a Keeper," Harry added. Hermione rolled her eyes.

at the start of the summer break, and forbid him to talk to the neighbors.

This separation from his spellbooks had been--

"Wait a minute," Remus said, "If they took away your books, then how do you have A History of Magic?"

"Well, it's obvious, isn't it?" Sirius asked, "He's a Potter, he's bound to get in trouble! Duh!"

a real problem for Harry, because his teachers at Hogwarts had given him a lot of holiday work. One of the essays, a particularly nasty one about shrinking potions, was for Harry's least favorite teacher, Professor Snape,--

"Snape? A professor? Has Dumbledore gone mad?" the Marauders asked in awe.

"Some think he has," Hermione said in a tone you would use to comment on the weather.

who would be delighted to have an excuse to give Harry detention for a month. Harry had therefore seized his chance in the first week of holidays. While Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and Dudley had gone out into the front garden to admire Uncle Vernon's new company car (in very loud voices,--

"Show offs," Sirius muttered.

"I couldn't agree with you more, Sirius. Not a bit more," Harry sighed.

so that the rest of the street would notice it too), Harry had crept downstairs, picked the lock on the cupboard under the stairs,--

"See? I told you he was a Potter!" Sirius said.

"Yes, Sirius, you did," an exasperated Remus said.

grabbed some of his books, and hidden them in his bedroom. As long as he didn't leave ink spots on the sheets, the Dursleys need never know that he was studying magic by night.

Harry was particularly keen to avoid trouble with his aunt and uncle at the moment, as they were already in an especially bad mood with him, all because he'd received a telephone call from a fellow wizard one week into the school vacation.

"Two things. One: what's a fellytone?" Sirius asked. Hermione sighed.

"It's a device that Muggles use to contact one another with. It's like floo-ing someone, but you can't actually see them, only hear them." Taz explained.

"Oh. Two: Which one of you did it?" Sirius asked Ron and Hermione.

"Ooooooh! I say it's Hermione!" James said.

"I'd say it's Ron," Remus said.

"Would you like to bet on that?" James asked.

"Of course," Remus answered in a sly tone.

"How about twenty galleons?" James suggested.

"You're on," Remus answered calmly and confidently.

Ron Weasley, who was one of Harry's best friends at Hogwarts, came from a whole family of wizards. This meant that he knew a lot of things Harry didn't, but had never used a telephone before.

"Ha! In your face! He's never used a fellytone before, so it must have been Hermione!" James yelled.

"I'm not paying yet. It hasn't said who actually called," Remus replied confidently.

Most unluckily, it had been Uncle Vernon who had answered the call.

"Vernon Dursley speaking."

Harry, who happened to be in the room at the time, froze when he heard Ron's voice answer.

James looked dumbstruck.

"Pay up," Remus said holding out his hand, palm up.

"B-but--," James stuttered.

"Tut tut. Going back on a bet, are you?" Remus asked.

"Well, no, but--,"

"No buts, pay up, now," Remus interrupted. James grumbled and gave a boastful Remus twenty galleons.

"Thank-you," Remus said, pocketing the money.

"HELLO? HELLO? CAN YOU HEAR ME? I--WANT--TO TALK--TO--HARRY--POTTER!"

Ron was yelling so loudly that Uncle Vernon jumped and held the receiver a foot away from his ear, staring at it with an expression of mingled fury and alarm.

"WHO IS THIS?" he roared in the direction of the mouthpiece. "WHO ARE YOU?"

"RON--WEASLEY!" Ron bellowed back, as though he and Uncle Vernon were speaking from opposite ends of a football field. "I'M--A--FRIEND--OF--HARRY'S--FROM--SCHOOL--,"

Uncle Vernon's small eyes swiveled around to Harry, who was rooted on the spot.

"THERE IS NO HARRY POTTER HERE!" he roared, now holding the receiver at arm's length, as though frightened it might explode. "I DON'T KNOW WHAT SCHOOL YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! NEVER CONTACT ME AGAIN! DON'T YOU COME NEAR MY FAMILY!"

And he threw the receiver back onto the telephone as if dropping a poisonous spider.

Ron shivered. "I don't like spiders at all, poisonous or not," he said.

"Well, that was rude of him!" Hermione stated. Everyone stared at her (it would be now that you would hear those annoying crickets). "Well, it was!" It was still quiet. Taz blinked, shook her head and continued to read into the silence.

The fight that had followed had been worse than ever.

"HOW DARE YOU GIVE THIS NUMBER OUT TO PEOPLE LIKE--PEOPLE LIKE YOU!" Uncle Vernon had roared, spraying Harry with spit.

"Ugh! Sorry, mate!" Ron said to Harry.

Ron obviously realized that he'd gotten Harry into trouble, because he hadn't called again.

"Well, gee, who would've guessed that?" said Peter sarcastically. Harry glowered. Sirius noticed this again, and made a mental note to talk to Harry, alone.


Author notes: Please review! Hope you liked! The next chapter should be up shortly.