If Love is a Game...

Chapter Eighteen

Getting Ready

He lay quite still on the ground, panting hoarsely. His eyes were closed and he lay still, sprawled on the ground. He tried to take deep breaths, he really needed them, but it hurt and the panting didn't make it any better on his weakened body. His chest rose and fell a little and his back was pressed against the cold floor, yet he was burning up. It was winter and he felt like he was having a heat stroke. He just continued to pant.

It had been a very rough night for Remus, a very rough and long night indeed. After all, transforming into a werewolf and back to human was excruciatingly painful. He could barely move a muscle in his body and just breathing seemed to be miserable enough. Without anyone there to help him to his feet and comment on what a great night they had, Remus didn't think he could get up. He just lay there, perfectly still and in pain.

After what seemed like an hour, Remus forced himself to get to his feet. He pushed himself up off of the bed and tried to stand up, but his body was very weak and he collapsed onto the bed.

Well, at least it wasn't the floor you landed on this time, Remus mused.

The bed was not clean with the fresh scent of winter. No, it was dirty and therefore it wasn't as appreciated by Remus as much as it had been the first time he'd collapsed on it alone. He pushed himself up, wondering if he would die at an early age because of the pain transforming caused him. He tripped and smacked into the wall, feeling as if he could not walk. He grasped something cold--his robes. He slipped them back on and almost fell over again. He grabbed the doorknob and caught himself. He pulled himself back up to his feet and froze.

He had given no excuse for his sudden leave. Sara was bound to be very suspicious and Peter might still be in the Hospital Wing. And looking at his state, she'd probably begin to wonder if he'd gotten in a fight with a troll or something. So, he stumbled backwards and fell onto the bed. Maybe if he could just take a nap, he would look better and he could make up a better excuse. Slowly, Remus drifted off into a deep sleep that not even a tornado could wake him from.

~*~

Krystyna didn't much like the afternoons at her house, and especially not this one. Her parents and brother and sister had come back home, and it seemed they came back just to annoy her greatly. With her mother bustling around the entire house exuberantly, Marlena taking every chance she got to pick at how Krystyna looked in the morning, and Samuel eyeing her very peculiarly, she had no chance to regain the happiness she had captured earlier on in the morning.

"Krystyna, it's the afternoon, take a shower!" Mrs. Melanie shrieked anxiously, pounding on her door loudly. Krystyna growled and tossed in her bed. She just wanted to take a nap; she was tired. "Krystyna, now, you hear me young lady, unlock this door right now!"

"You can do it yourself, you have a wand!" Krystyna shouted agitatedly, putting her pillow over her head to block out her mother's voice. Her mother obviously didn't like that because the next thing she knew, her door was wide open and she was pulled out of her bed and onto the floor awkwardly along with her blanket.

"Mum!" Krystyna yelled furiously.

"Don't you dare talk like that to me!" Mrs. Melanie hissed acidly. Krystyna didn't much care what her mother thought at the moment. Right now, she was exhausted and she just wanted to rest. Her mother dragged her to her feet and put the blankets back on the bed while Krystyna glared at her through her groggy, green eyes.

"Oh, hush, I'm tired, do you want me to look all groggy at the Malfoy Manor, mother?" Krystyna said back rather stupidly. Mrs. Melanie tried not to glare at her.

"A shower will do you wonders," Mrs. Melanie told her. She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms across her chest.

"I already took a shower, mum," Krystyna replied stubbornly.

"I don't care!" Mrs. Melanie growled, pushing Krystyna out of the room as she tried to push back furiously. Of course, she was rather tired and wasn't as strong as usually. "You are going to take another shower whether you like it or not!"

She pushed Krystyna in the bathroom and let her turn around. Mrs. Melanie grabbed the handle of the door and looked up at her.

"You have to be perfect for Lucius," Mrs. Melanie said softly.

Krystyna pulled a wretched face, completely revolted with the idea and said, "Ew, I don't want to be perfect for that idiot--"

Mrs. Melanie slammed the bathroom door in her face, leaving her locked in a bathroom. There was no other option than to take another shower to appease her mother so she could at least have something to eat. As Krystyna turned on the water, she thought about the bright side--there weren't many.

Well, I'll definitely be able to eat because my parents can't starve me at the Malfoy Manor, now can they, Krystyna thought as she undressed and hopped in the shower. And I'll have Lorena there with me so once we're excused from the dinner table I'll be able to go to her room with her; unless they make me go with Lucius, but I doubt that. So...I'll have Lorena there and I'll be able to eat. Those are my bright options to this dark story. Now that's just peachy.

She rolled her eyes in the shower and continued to scrub herself down until she thought her mother would be pleased. She stopped the water and got out, wrapping at towel around herself. She found her wand on the counter and grabbed it. As she used the Drying Charm, she wondered if Lorena was going through the same situation. She also wondered if her letters had gotten through her father's scanning process (although he really doesn't have one quite like that) and if any had gotten to who they were addressed to. She really wished she was at Hogwarts still. The holiday season was turning out to be a dark and miserable time. It was more of a drag than cheerful spirits.

~*~

James had never seen Sirius this anxious since he'd first asked Krystyna out. He watched helplessly as Sirius ran around the entire house like a maniac, talking out loud to himself as everyone got ready. He didn't even know what was wrong with his best friend until he stopped Sirius from almost ramming into Lily, who was trying to tell Petunia that Sirius was not paranoid.

"Hold up, Padfoot; what in the world is wrong with you?" James demanded rather concernedly, gripping Sirius by his shoulders to stop him from continuing his rampage outside the house. "You've been talking to yourself all day and running everywhere like a maniac. What's up with that?"

"Christmas--Krystyna--present--none--mad--don't know--" Sirius spluttered incoherently, flapping his hands crazily and his eyes very wide, as if he had just drunk a gallon of coffee. James didn't know what to make of what he was saying. Petunia was looking at him in horror while Lily had her eyebrows raised worriedly. "Christmas--present--what to get--scared--seeing her--tomorrow--confused--Krystyna--miss her--Christmas--"

"Hey, what's your problem?" James questioned loudly, trying to shake the nonsense out of Sirius, who was still looking wild and crazy, his black hair all messy.

"He's a nutter!" Petunia shrieked shrilly, terrified of him.

"Now, Petunia, let's not get carried away," Lily said soothingly, attempting to calm her sister down with no prevail. Petunia was downright afraid of him. "I think he's worried about his girlfriend and--"

"You brought a mad man into our house!" Petunia screamed piercingly, interrupting Lily. "Your friends with a dangerous, psychotic freak!"

James rounded on her quickly and glared at her furiously. "Hey, Sirius is not a dangerous, psychotic freak, got that?! He can be a little crazy at times, but he's not dangerous, I promise!" he exclaimed angrily. Petunia screamed even louder. James looked back at Sirius. "Hey! Hey!"

He was getting no rational response from Sirius, who was looking pale and ill at the same time, strangely enough. Sirius was trying to pursue, but James wouldn't let him until he got a full explanation of what was going on with his friend.

"Hey, snap out of it, Sirius!" James shouted over Sirius' stammers. He shook him again, but Sirius kept talking gibberish and nonsense incoherently. James rolled his eyes, but got a crazy idea out of the blue. He grinned evilly. "Hey, Sirius, I heard Krystyna's making out with Malfoy in the Astronomy Tower tonight."

"What?!" Sirius boomed bemusedly. He almost fell over backwards, but James pushed him back up to his feet. Sirius looked around everywhere. "What was that? Krystyna--making out--Malfoy--Astronomy Tower?!"

"Hehe... Er, just kidding with ya, Sirius," James sniggered. Sirius stopped and looked back at James, who was sniggering. Lily rolled her eyes while Petunia had stopped screaming. He looked around at all of them and scratched his head. "Now that you're calmed down--sort of--tell us what's wrong."

Sirius took a very deep breath. "It's Christmas Day tomorrow and I have nothing for Krystyna. I don't know what to get her because she didn't tell me what she wanted and I'm confused. I'm scared that I might get her something she doesn't like and she'll be mad at me because she might think that I don't love her, which I really do, and I miss her a lot and I want to see her, but I don't know how to," he said, all in one large breath. He took another deep breath. James was gaping at him with his jaw dropped and Lily had her eyebrows still raised. Petunia was still looking scared.

"Lil, I think I'll take Sirius to Diagon Alley, alright?" James told his girlfriend. She thought about it and then nodded her head, thinking that it sounded right. "Do you want to come? I mean, you obviously know what Krystyna's likes and dislikes--unlike this thick-skulled guy beside me."

"Hey!" Sirius yelled, jokingly affronted by James's comment. "I'm not that stupid!"

"Well..."--she glanced at Petunia--"Of course I want to come, silly!"

"Have money, Sirius?" James asked. Sirius nodded his head. They grabbed their coats and boots because it had snowed at Diagon Alley. Lily grabbed her and James's money before she huddled together with them. James waved to Petunia. "Adieu, Petunia!"

With three loud pops! James, Sirius, and Lily immediately disappeared in thin air, going to Diagon Alley. Petunia, never seeing anyone Apparate before, freaked out and shrieked. Her mother, Mrs. Evans, had to run up the stairs and calm her down with some hot tea.

~*~

Lorena was lucky enough to hide away in her room at the Malfoy Manor before Mrs. Malfoy did her raid to clean everything--and everyone--in the house up. With a cheerful smirk on her face, she heard as Mrs. Malfoy yelled at Lucius for missing a strand of hair while combing.

Then came the time when Mrs. Malfoy pounded on her bedroom door. She'd avoided it this far and she was proud enough about that. Reluctantly, she stalked over to the locked door. Before she opened it, she conjured a mirror with her wand to check herself in it. Her hair and make up (she rolled her eyes and pulled a face) needed to be done. She wasn't allowed to put on her dress robes until an hour before the Melanies came over so she wouldn't crease it too much, but she was fine with that. She opened the door to get a slur of shouts in her face.

"Lorena, your hair and make up; what's wrong with this picture?!" Mrs. Malfoy shrieked, horrified that Lorena had been in her room all day and had done nothing but taken a shower and prepped herself up for what was going to be a dreadful night.

"Do you want me to mess it up?" Lorena replied serenely, folding her arms across her chest and grinning slightly. "You know perfectly well that you don't like the way I style my hair and you know that I usually don't wear make up. I think I look just fine naturally, thank you very much."

Mrs. Malfoy huffed and she puffed and--as that one Muggle story went--Lorena was afraid that her aunt my blow her room in--if that was even possible. She looked at Mrs. Malfoy calmly, as if she wasn't on the verge of strangling her at all. Really, she didn't know why Mrs. Malfoy was so nervous about tonight; it wasn't that big, was it?

"You really do have wonderful complexion and if you would just try once in a while to do something with that beautiful platinum blond hair of yours, you'd look absolutely astonishing. I guess I'll have Estella do your hair and make up; she's so wonderful at it and she just loves doing it," Mrs. Malfoy murmured quietly to herself.

Estella Stiles was Marcus's fiancé, a fashion and make up artist that gave tips and advice to witches and wizards in a small column in the Daily Prophet on page two called Estella Styles, which she proved to be rather good at. Lorena had thought it rather humorous, but chose not to point it out when around her family. She, unlike most of everyone married to a Malfoy, did not have the usual platinum blond hair, but dark brown hair with blond streaks. She also had blue eyes, but Malfoys--and Fawcetts--usually had grey or blue eyes.

"Whatever, auntie," Lorena sighed passively, rolling her eyes. She heard a loud ringing and looked back around inside her room. A clock on her wall was chiming for another hour. She looked back at Mrs. Malfoy with a faint grin. "You have three hours. Think you can decontaminate any scum left in this house by then?"

"I'm going to get Estella," Mrs. Malfoy said quickly, bustling off once more. "Estella! Estella, come quickly and fix up Lorena, would you, dear?"

Estella walked out of her room with elegant composure, a light smile painted on her face and her blue eyes resting calmly on Mrs. Malfoy. She was looking amazing, as usual. She nodded her head and Mrs. Malfoy rounded the corner, shouting for some random house-elf furiously. Estella looked up and saw Lorena gazing at her dully, her light smile turning into a grin. She shut her door and walked over to Lorena, motioning her to come forward.

"Well, we've got two hours to find the perfect you," Estella said elegantly. Lorena was bored of how perfect she acted. "Shall we get to it, hm?"

"Like I have a choice?" Lorena replied sardonically. She shut her door loudly, unlike Estella, and began to traipse down the dark corridor for the master bathroom where all the make up and things were at to "fix" her up. Lorena turned around and rolled her eyes as Estella glanced at her reprovingly, evidently disliking how loud she really was. "C'mon, powder puff, we ain't got all day, now do we?"

Estella didn't much like that either. "I'm not a powder puff, you insufferable brat," she scoffed angrily. "I'm a fashion editor in the Daily Prophet that is much admired. I, unlike you, actually know how to make my features radiate perfectly."

"And I, unlike you, know that inner beauty is all that matters when it comes to guys that are decent and respectable," Lorena replied sweetly, smirking softly. "As someone once said, it's what's on inside that counts. Outer beauty fades as you get older, but inner beauty is priceless and never dies away."

"But you also have to impress those boys and men out there," Estella said stubbornly. Lorena began to crack up, even though she knew she shouldn't.

"Listen; besides what you may think, I wouldn't need to impress those boys and men with my image because they would like me for who I am; not for what I look like, okay?" Lorena replied coolly. "I think I might just have that guy already in my mind so I have no need to look like some Muggle clown, which creep me out anyway. Just get on with this so my aunt won't freak, okay? They say you're good at it, which you really are, but I'm just not one of those kind of...girlie girls."

It was an insult and a compliment at the same time. Quite strange, but she'd managed it. Estella thought about what she had said for a second and then decided that she could forgive her soon-to-be little cousin. Besides, she loved doing someone else's hair and make up. And from what she heard, she was going to have to impress one of Lucius' friends that were coming to the dinner. Lorena turned back around and headed for the bathroom with Estella following behind her. How good it felt to finally be able to insult someone again.

~*~

Remus had finished his nap and had felt much better, considering that he had been a werewolf for one entire night and bitten himself. He wandered into the Hospital Wing to see Peter sitting in his bed, slurping on some soup. Sara was not there. He sighed with relief as he shut the door behind himself quietly, trying not to make his appearance that noticeable. However, Peter heard and looked up at him with concerned eyes and a nauseous face, still.

"Remus--you're back--I'm so sorry--did you have a--you look rough!" Peter exclaimed disjointedly, his eyes very wide with anxiousness. Remus slowly made his way over to his friend. He plopped down on the bed beside his.

"Thanks," Remus muttered sarcastically, a twinge coming from his stomach as he hunched down to ease the pain in his back, which was proving to be worse than the stomach pain. He frowned at Peter, who was looking more worried than usual.

"Remus, I'm sorry--does it hurt?" Peter questioned apprehensively. Remus rolled his eyes. That was one of the bluntest questions he'd been asked, and he'd been asked a lot.

"Oh, no, it doesn't hurt at all," Remus snapped sarcastically. Peter recoiled slightly in his bed and looked down at his feet. He knew it must've been pretty bad for Remus to snap at him like that because he usually was never that brash. Immediately, Remus felt guilty for doing that. It wasn't Peter's fault at all; it was no one's fault. They couldn't have done anything because Peter, in his rat form, would not have been able to control a fully grown werewolf.

"I'm sorry, Peter, I shouldn't have snapped at you like that," Remus murmured regretfully. Peter looked up at his friend, hopeful that he might get better.

"You should go ahead and find a bed, Moony; Madam Pomfrey will take one look at you and shriek," Peter told him under his breath. "She was in a right state when both Professor McGonagall and Professor Lector said that they couldn't find you last night."

Remus could only imagine what it must've been like for them last night. They were probably worried sick that a full grown werewolf was stalking the grounds of Hogwarts, able to attack any student at any moment all night. He felt a pang of slight anger. Didn't they trust him?

No, of course they don't trust you, Remus; you're a nasty werewolf and werewolves can never be trusted, the blasted things, because they are evil, sly, dark, and dangerous. What were you thinking, trusting all those people? a voice in the back of Remus's mind nagged tryingly.

Remus felt a little down and looked down at his feet, which were in his dirty shoes. He shuffled them around until he kicked them off, feeling even worse when he saw scratch marks on them. They didn't trust him, but he tried so hard to do what they wanted. Did they even care if he almost killed himself, gnawing and scratching at himself without realizing it?

"What happened?" Remus asked in a barely audible whisper. Peter bit his lip, but continued on with the story, nevertheless.

"Well, they kept looking at me strangely and Sara wanted to know why. I didn't tell her, of course, but they came over and asked us if we'd seen you lately. We both said you ran out quickly and you were really nervous," Peter explained slowly. He nodded his head, understanding. "Well, they left, but they kept coming in at night, saying that they still hadn't found you. If Professor Lector comes in here, he'll probably bombard you with more questions than you can handle, Moony; so be prepared."

Remus nodded his head again, completely understanding what Peter was saying. If Lector was the first one to see him--besides Peter--he would in no doubt be loaded with demands and questions of his whereabouts and what he was doing. Then, Madam Pomfrey walked out of her office looking very tired and frightened. She didn't even glance at Peter and him as she bustled passed them, but immediately stopped. She looked back at them and saw Remus sitting in the bed next to Peter, looking terribly worn out and battered up.

"Oh my goodness, Lupin, you're back!" Madam Pomfrey shrieked worriedly, rushing over to him as quickly as possible and checking him over immediately. Remus knew she was just worried about his condition and his state, but he really wished she wouldn't do it. Every spot she touched seared with pain and only made him feel worse.

"My goodness, I was completely worried about you all last night, my dear boy!" Madam Pomfrey gushed out. "You should've come straight to me or one of the professors! Oh, you look absolutely dreadful, pulling and biting at yourself all night long with no one there to keep you company. How awful it must've been for you--"

Suddenly, the doors burst open. Peter snapped his head up and spewed some pumpkin juice on his bed sheets. He started choking and Madam Pomfrey checked him, paying no attention whatsoever to whoever came into the Infirmary. It was Professor Lector, the Potions Master.

"It's nearly two in the afternoon and I've still seen no sight of Lupin--" He looked around and saw Remus sitting on the bed with an old thermometer sticking out of his mouth awkwardly. He didn't much like the Muggle ways of taking one's temperature.

Lector just sort of stared at him for a second, nothing being said between Madam Pomfrey's scoldings on why Peter shouldn't guzzle pumpkin juice down so quickly because it could kill him. Remus waved at his Potions' professor awkwardly and laughed nervously.

"Hehe...hello, Professor Lector, have a good night sleep--I hope?" Remus said very anxiously, trying his best to smile with no prevail. Lector's cold glare iced through his stare.

"Lupin--what--were--you--thinking--last--night?" Lector snarled, advancing on him so threateningly that he actually leaned back in his bed when he got close.

"I was thinking on the lines of getting my arse out of here and somewhere safe," Remus said quietly, sort of angry with Lector for not trusting him. He was one of the most rule abiding--well, he broke the rules often and broke the rules just being friends with James and Sirius--students at Hogwarts and here Lector was, giving him a lecture on to obey rules.

"You could've bitten someone--a student, perhaps!" Lector hissed acidly, clenching his fists together tightly and looking full of rage.

"But I didn't, I went to the Shrieking Shack all by myself because I had no time whatsoever to find anyone to help me there," Remus muttered angrily, acting as though Peter didn't know anything about him being a werewolf and wanting to keep it secret. "It's not like I could run up to some random student and say, 'Hey, I'm going to hide in the Shrieking Shack, can you tell a professor?' That would be kind of stupid, you know."

"What did you do last night?" Lector growled madly, grabbing his shirt collar and pulling, raising him up off of his bed a little. This had to be abuse. The wounds on his back smarted as the back of his robes became tight on his skin. His muscles ached with pain. If he wasn't a good pupil, he would've punched Lector right then and there he was so ticked off at him. And that was definitely not like him. He tended to be rather moody and impulsive after full moons.

"I was--"

Madam Pomfrey shrilled when she turned around and saw Lector grabbing Remus by his shirt collar in his fit of rage. She unquestionably did not approve of this at all. She immediately pulled the professor off of him and almost slapped him.

"How dare you--"

"I need to know what he did--"

"I was practically killing myself--"

"Killing yourself--?" Peter blurted, looking slightly green and queasy suddenly. He looked as though he was about to faint.

"You bit yourself--?"

"He needs his rest!"

"Ah, calm yourself, you insufferable woman; he looks fine to me," Lector muttered, shrugging her off completely. Madam Pomfrey looked appalled with the man and very affronted.

"Well, excuse me for trying to keep a student healthy!" she cried out madly. "Of course, you care more about your bloody position than a student's welfare!"

Remus found that he was rather infuriated by Lector's statement too. He didn't know how painful it was to transfer into a werewolf and then back to a human. He didn't know how it felt in the morning to feel the bite marks of the night before. He didn't know that it felt like he was falling apart at the seams from so much biting and scratching.

"Oh, yeah, I look fine, but IT FEELS LIKE BLOODY HELL TO ME!!!" Remus roared very irately, trying to sit up and force his way to Lector to pummel him. Madam Pomfrey was surprisingly strong and pushed him back into the bed.

"You need your sleep," she hushed.

"He doesn't--the stupid--the pain--" Remus spluttered heatedly. Madam Pomfrey pushed Lector out of the Hospital Wing and came back with some medicine Remus presumed was a Sleeping Draught. Having no other option, he drank it and felt his head fall against the pillows. As his vision darkened, he saw Peter looking at him worriedly. Remus fell asleep once again.

88

"Sirius, stop--wait for me--do something other than run!" James shouted loudly, chasing after his best friend once again as he dashed out of yet another store frantically. Lily trailed behind her boyfriend, trying her best not to giggle too much. Sirius jumped into another store. James, growling with frustration, pulled a face of irritation and walked in. Lily jogged in behind him cheerfully.

"Do you think she'll like this?" Sirius demanded, holding up something. "What about this? Or this? Is this something Krystyna would like, Lily?"

He kept picking up random things and setting them back down to pick up another thing on a shelf quickly. James, at the moment, was being mesmerized by a silver spinning instrument and started gaping at it stupidly, drooling a little while Lily was trying to calm Sirius down.

"Sirius, hold on, okay?" Lily said, sniggering still. After a few more attempts, she had finally gotten Sirius to stay put and to stop fiddling with objects. "I know what she really wants, but I think she'd get mad if I told you because she'd say it would be too expensive."

"I don't care!" Sirius yelled hastily, looking anxious to hear the perfect present he could get for Krystyna because he had no idea what to get her. He had never been good at that kind of stuff and was sure to get it all wrong by himself. Lily was a real life saver, she truly was. She rolled her eyes at him, knowing that he'd probably get the most expensive thing in the world for Krystyna if she really wanted it that badly.

"She says it's expensive though..." Lily sighed deeply.

"I--don't--care!" Sirius yelled loudly, frustrated with everything completely. He knew that he should have gotten Krystyna something sooner than this, but he had no idea and was all too smitten with her to do anything, really. Lily was just being stubborn.

"Well, her broom's finally gone to the blitz and not so good anymore," Lily told him serenely. "What she really needs--and really wants--is a new broom."

"A new broom! Yes, that's perfect! I got it!" Sirius exclaimed joyously. "Thanks, Lily! I'm off to the Quidditch Supply Store!"

Sirius clapped his best friend, who was still gaping at the silvery instrument stupidly and drooling even more now, on his shoulder, his eyes looking very groggy. He didn't even budge or snap back at Sirius for doing that to him.

"James, you might want to stop drooling, you're in public and in front of Lily, I might add," Sirius said quietly. James suddenly snapped out of his trance-like state and looked around. A few people were staring back at him rather amusedly. He turned his head around and saw Lily giggling uncontrollably. He suddenly blushed with embarrassment. "Good-bye, you two."

Sirius bounced out the store once again. James glanced at Lily and scratched his head. It suddenly hit him. "Oy, we've got to follow him!" he said loudly. Lily giggled and nodded her head. They ran out after him, just in case he did something to accidentally hurt himself or someone else.