The Yellow Room of Insanity

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Chapter 2: The Insanity Continues, and the Evil Purple Stuffed Bunnies Return

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It was now early December, around ten o' clock in the evening. All of our characters were lounging about in the Common Room except for Lily and James, who were off at a Headperson meeting with Dumbledore, the Headmaster and McGonagall, the Headmistress. Katz, Jen, Jess, and Chan were all arguing over the title for their new song.

"It should be called 'Glass'," Chan said.

"I like 'Plastic'," said Nix.

"'Obsidian'," Katz insisted.

This argument went on for some time until James and Lily came in and tacked something onto the notice board. Then they came over and sat down.

"There's to be a ball on Christmas Day," Lily said.

"Dumbledore's going to make the big announcement tomorrow at breakfast," added James.

"Lily, do you think our new song should be titled 'Obsidian', 'Glass', or 'Plastic'?" Katz asked.

"Well, 'Plastic' is downright crazy. 'Glass doesn't sound that good. But I like 'Obsidian'. Go with that one."

"'Obsidian' it is," Katz said, grinning. Jen and Chan glared at her. "Hey, guys, come on. We're all doing the lyrics!" They sighed and nodded.

"But, you'll have to do them tomorrow," said Lily.

"Why?" asked Jess, confused.

"Because it's ten thirty, and it's time to go to bed."

"Oh, all right." They all trudged up to bed.

***In the Girl's Dorm***

Lily sat down on her bed, clad in her nightgown. Katz was sitting on her bed, lightly strumming her guitar, wearing a tank top and long pajama pants. Chan was wearing a very large night shirt and boxer shorts. Nix was wearing a large t-shirt and leggings, and Jess was wearing the same outfit as Katz.

"So Lily, has James asked you to go to the ball with him?" Katz asked.

"No, not yet. Hey, what guy do you want to ask you to the ball?"

"Remus," said Nix.

"No one," Katz said. The other four girls stared at her.

"What do you mean, 'no one'?" Chan asked.

"I'm happy single, thank you very much. Besides, you know that all boys are capitalist imperialists. And I defy all capitalist imperialists and pledge my allegiance to the Tsar."

The girls looked blank. "Huh?"

"Never mind. Anyways, does anyone want some sour gummy worms?"

"I do!" Lily, Chan, Nix, and Jess yelled. Katz went into her trunk and pulled out a bag of Trolli Brite Crawlers (TM) and passed them around. There was a chorus of 'mmm, yummy's.

Katz had just stuck a pink and blue one in her mouth when she heard a tapping on the window. She went over and saw an owl there. She opened the window, let the owl in, and took the letter that the owl held out for her. It then flew back out the window. Katz read the letter quickly and swallowed her gummy worm.

"Attention all members of Flaming Rose!" she called. They all turned to look at her. "Dumbledore wants us to meet him in his office at six AM tomorrow morning."

"'Kay, whatever." Katz rolled her eyes and went to bed.

**The next morning**

Katz woke up extra early, took a shower, and got dressed in her favorite pair of jeans and her personalized sweatshirt. When she came out of the bathroom, the others were already up and dressed. They headed down. Dumbledore met them in from of the gargoyle.

"Hello, ladies," he said. Nix, who was not a morning person, glared at him. He merely smiled. "I was wondering if you would play for part of the ball."

Katz raised her eyebrow. "How much is 'part'?" she queried.

"Oh, about five songs, maybe more."

"Huddle!" The girls grouped around Katz. "Do you think we should?'

"I don't see why not."

"We could do kareoke."

"It might be fun."

They straightened and turned to Dumbledore. "We'll do it," Katz said.

"Wonderful. Thank you girls."

"No prob, dude," said Nix with another glare. They walked off. "I'm going back to bed," she announced.

"I have to go borrow James' invisibility cloak," said Katz.

"Why?"

"You'll find out at breakfast."

With that, Katz skipped off. The other girls looked at each other, puzzled, then shrugged and headed back to Gryffindor Tower.

**Breakfast**

Nix, Chan, Jess, Lily, Remus, James, and Peter all sat at the Gryffindor table, eating breakfast. Katz and Sirius had disappeared.

Dumbledore had made his announcement about the ball and left.

**The Owlery**

"Do you think it will work?" whispered a voice.

"Katz!" Sirius said, whipping around. "You should be downstairs, putting the spells on him!"

She looked guilty. "I know, but I wanted to see how you were going to manage to get a bucket of soapy water with a little lemon juice into the Great Hall without being seen."

"Well, you see now," Sirius said, beckoning a few owls down from their perches.

"Okay. Bye!" She ran off.

Sirius began fastening the bucket to the owls' feet. Then he had them try to lift it. They couldn't, so he beckoned a few more down and tied the bucket to their feet. This time, they could lift it.

"Don't spill it, or drop it. You dump it on this person"-here Sirius produced a picture of Snape-"at the Slytherin table. I'm sure you are very intelligent owls, and this is why I entrusted the job to you. Do you understand?" Sirius was given several encouraging nips. "Thanks, guys. Now, off you go!" The owls flew off.

**The Great Hall**

Katz waited for someone to go out of the Great Hall so she could slip in. Presently, a Ravenclaw came out and she slipped in. Tiptoeing over to the Slytherin table, she got behind Snape and pulled out her wand. She began mouthing the words to the spells she and Sirius had altered to fit their plans.

When she finished, she headed back to the doors, where Sirius stood. She gave him a small tap, and her opened the doors. Quickly pulling off the cloak, she stuffed it in her bag and went back into the Great Hall. The others waved her over.

"Did you do it?" Sirius asked her. She nodded, grinning. They heard the flapping of wings.

"Ooh, mail's here!" she cried, jumping up. Many people were staring in wonder at the six owls that flew over the Slytherin table, carrying a bucket. All of the sudden, they dumped it onto Snape. Nothing happened, except Snape, with a cry, leaped out of his chair, thoroughly wet.

"It isn't working," Sirius hissed.

"Wait for it," Katz said with another grin.

Slowly, Snape's hair began to turn bright red, his skin yellow-gold, and his robes were turned bright red with little golden lions dotting them.

The entire hall burst into laughter, except the Slytherins and Snape. Katz and Sirius were down on the floor, laughing their heads off. Katz had tears of laughter running down her face.

"Oy, Snape!" Sirius called, standing up. "I didn't know you liked the Gryffindor colors!"

A look of dawning realization came onto Snape's face, which before had held a look of horror, disgust, and puzzlement. "BLACK! Blast you and your triple-cursed wash water!" he yelled.

Sirius had a look of pure innocence upon his face. "I didn't do anything," he said, crossing his fingers behind his back.

"You dumped SOAPY WATER on me!" Snape screeched.

"It has a bit of lemon juice in it, too," Katz offered helpfully. "And Sirius didn't dump it on you, the owls did."

"I suppose you had a part in this too, Potter?"

"Well, I did provide the soapy water with lemon juice induced spells."

Professor McGonagall came striding into the hall. She surveyed the scene before her with an impassive face. "Potter, Black, detention. Tomorrow night, with Mr. Filch in the trophy room."

Katz and Sirius looked at each other. And grinned. "Yes, Professor," they chorused. McGonagall exited the hall, followed by Sirius and Katz.

**The Next Night**

Sirius and Katz trooped into the trophy room, where Filch stood waiting.

"You're to polish all the trophies," he told them. "Without magic. Hand over the wands." They willingly gave them up. He left, pocketing the wands.

But little did he know that those were not their real wands. They were fake.

And so, Katz and Sirius got out their real wands and polished all the trophies with a couple charms. Then they soaked the rags with polish, rung them out a bit, and dumped the rest of the polish out the window. Wonder of wonders, an agitated cry was heard after they dumped the polish out. Looking down, they saw that they had accidentally dumped it onto Lucius Malfoy.

"Oops," Katz said, before bursting into laughter. Sirius joined her. When their laughter had subsided, Katz pulled out a two-liter of Pepsi, a bag of popcorn, and two cups.

For the rest of their detention time, they talked and ate. When Filch came in, he was amazed that they had gotten all the trophies to sparkle in suck a short time. Nevertheless, he handed them their wands and told them they could go.

On the way back to the Common Room, Katz noticed that Sirius kept stealing glances at her. However, he said nothing. Finally, at the end of the Gryffindor corridor, Sirius stopped and looked at her.

"Katz, I was wondering if you'd.... If you'd... go to the ball with me."

Katz stared at him. Color was flushing into his cheeks, and she knew she was turning red as well. Biting her lip, she said, "All right, I suppose. As long as I don't have to wear some horrible old dress from the 1800's." This caused them both to laugh.

They went into the Common Room, where they found a blushing Nix and Remus.

"Yes, I'll go with you," Nix said.

Katz sat down next to her, saying, "I see you've got a date for the ball."

Nix grinned. "Yeah. What about you?"

Katz nodded. "Ooh! Who?"

"Sirius asked me just now."

"You're going with Sirius?"

"Yep."

"Wow. James asked Lily right after you left. Jess and Chan are still without boys."

"The fourth and fifth wheels," said Katz with a grin. Nix chuckled.

"Well, I suppose"-yawn-"that we should"-yawn-"get to bed," she said, yawning again.

"Definitely," replied Katz.

***A few days later***

The girls all awoke to the loud tapping of an owl on the window. Katz was the first out of bed; she took the package, glanced at the addressee, and handed it to Lily, saying, "Special delivery for a Miss Lillian Evans."

Lily opened the package, and gave a small scream when she saw what was inside. The other girls all scrambled to see what it was.

It was a pair of glass slippers. "Put them on," Chan urged.

"Who're they from?" Nix asked.

"James, obviously. Unless, of course, Lily's got some other secret lover that we and James don't know about," Jess replied.

"Lily! Are you snogging with Malfoy?" Katz asked.

Lily hit her and Jess with a pillow, trying not to upset the slippers, lest they fall and break.

"Try them on," Nix said. "We want to see how they look."

Lily obliged. They fit perfectly. "Just like Cinderella," said Chan with a sigh. "Wish I had a Prince Charming."

Lily began prancing around in the slippers. They moved with her feet, oddly enough. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. The girls all dove under their covers, though Lily took off her slippers and stowed them in the box under her bed beforehand.

"Come in," they called, once safely under the covers. In came James, Sirius, and Remus.

"Guys," Katz said, "we're not decent."

"We came at a good time then," said Sirius coyly. Katz whacked him with her pillow. "Ow!"

"Well, you deserved it, you ornery thing, you." Sirius pouted.

"Did you get my present, Lily?" James asked anxiously.

Lily smiled and jumped out of bed. "Yes I did get it, and may I add that it's superb!" she said, kissing him.

"Now, now, no snogging," Remus said.

"Yeah, it might add to something more...." Sirius trailed off, a sick look on his face. Katz swatted him with her pillow.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Sirius Ethelfride Black!"

At this everyone stopped dead. "Y-your middle name is-is Ethelfride?" James asked, roaring with laughter.

Sirius looked horrified. "No, it most certainly is not!" He grabbed Nix's pillow and began to hit her with it. She shrieked, jumped out of bed, and ran away from him.

Pandemonium ensued in the 7th Year Girls' Dormitory.

**The Night of the Ball**

Katz descended the stairs right in front of Lily, Jess, Nix, and Chan. She wore a pretty, backless purple dress that brought out her eerie purple eyes. Her hair was braided and wrapped around her head.

Lily wore a green, strapless dress and her glass slippers. Her hair was pulled up in a handsome chignon.

Nix wore a black halter top dress. Her hair hung down.

Jess wore a periwinkle colored dress that had several spaghetti straps. Her hair was pulled up into a becoming bun.

Chan wore a blue dress that had spaghetti straps that criss-crossed her bare back. Her hair fell loose as well.

Katz also carried a bag with her. "What have you got there?" Sirius asked.

"Tis a secret," replied Katz. Sirius glanced down. Good. She was wearing normal shoes. She had threatened to wear her combat boots.

"Well, I suppose we'd better go down," said James. They all nodded and headed downstairs. When they were right in front of the doors, Dumbledore took Katz, Nix, Chan, and Jess aside.

"Could you girls play first?" he asked.

"Sure! We'll just need to change our outfits."

"All right then, thank you."

"No problamo." The girls headed to one of the bathrooms.

When they emerged, they all wore pants that matched the tops of their dresses. In fact, it looked like they were wearing jumpsuits.

"All right, let's get this show on the road," said Katz, who had been true to her threat. She was now wearing her black combat boots and a white feather boa.

All of the couples entered the Great Hall. The members of Flaming Rose stepped up to the stage.

"Are y'all having a nice evening?" ask Katz. A weak 'yes' was heard, but most people were staring at Katz's very eccentric outfit. Katz looked steadily on, and said, "I am unique. Deal with it."

"Yes, yes, we all know that," said Nix. "Now, this is a song by us. It's titled 'Obsidian'."

"Easy to break

Sharp like glass

You make my heart ache

With your bloody class

And it's all your fault,

It's all because

I'm obsidian, obsidian

You call me, ask for a date

I agree, and then you're late

You hate my friends

Dump them you say

Yet you keep yours

Tom, Sam, and Jay

Why can't you

Let me do what I want?

Easy to break

Sharp like glass

You make my heart ache

With your bloody class

And it's all your fault,

It's all because

I'm obsidian, obsidian

Can't go out at night

We always fight

Can't talk to boys

Help me, I say

You turn away

I'm sick of your toys

Easy to break

Sharp like glass

You make my heart ache

With your bloody class

And it's all your fault,

It's all because

I'm obsidian, obsidian

I'm obsidian,

And soon you'll see

That I'm tougher than

You think I am

I'm obsidian, obsidian, obsidian!"

Here Nix had an amazing heavy guitar solo.

"Easy to break

Sharp like glass

You make my heart ache

With your bloody class

And it's all your fault,

It's all because

I'm obsidian, obsidian

Easy to break

Sharp like glass

You make my heart ache

With your bloody class

And it's all your fault,

It's all because

I'm obsidian, obsidian

You're being mean

You can't be seen

You're using me."

There were cheers all around. Katz bowed, then said, "And now, we have a special prize for the Obsidian Queen of the Ball!" She pulled out a thin, black crown made of obsidian. "We have four nominees, one from each house. For Slytherin, we have Narcissa Cooper. For Hufflepuff, we have Savannah Hawthorne. For Ravenclaw, we have LeFay Young, and for Gryffindor, we have the great, the wonderful, the one and only Lily Evans! Come on up here, girls!" The four girls walked up to the stage and faced the students. "James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter will be counting the votes. When I point to the girl you want to win, raise your hand." Katz pointed to each girl in turn. In the end, Lily won, and was awarded the crown. She then was allowed to sing a song.

When she finished, Flaming Rose played three more songs, then stepped off the stage. They went and changed, though Katz still wore her combat boots.

Sirius greeted her when she got back with a smile that was to die for. They began to dance to a slow waltz.

Suddenly, the doors flew open. A large army of evil purple stuffed bunnies stood there.

Katz sighed and broke away from Sirius, saying, "Excuse me. I knew they'd come back." She pulled off the bottom of her dress, revealing the pants she had been wearing earlier. Pulling a knife out of her right boot, she brandished it and stood before the bunnies.

"So you came back for more, eh?" she asked them. "Why, hello, Captain Lint." The bunny stepped forward.

"Get her!" he cried, and the bunnies surged forward. They knocked Katz down by the knees, grabbed her knife, and proceeded to tie her up.

She swore. "My, such colorful language," said an amused voice. Katz turned to see a thin, anorexic blonde walk up to her.

"Kelly Reed! What the heck are you doing here?"

"That's right. Me. I've teamed up with Captain Lint because I've been wanting to kill you for a long time, Potter. And now I have my chance."

"Wait just a minute there!" someone yelled, running up. It was James. "Keep your hands off my cousin, you wench!"

Kelly laughed. "Such a British term, 'wench.' But you will not succeed in defeating me!" With this, she pulled out her wand and pointed it at James. "Stupefy!" James fell to the floor, Stunned.

Sirius came running forward, his wand out and pointing at Kelly, crying, "Stupefy!" She fell to the foor, Stunned, just like James. Sirius then began to untie Katz. However, Captain Lint had other plans. He came charging up, a feather boa in his hand.

"How dare you defeat my mistress!" he yelled, hitting Sirius with the boa. Sirius rolled his eyes and pointed his wand at Captain Lint.

"Desentigo!" Captain Lint exploded into thousands of tiny bits of fluff. When this happened, all the other bunnies froze, before exploding just like their leader.

When Sirius untied Katz and hepled her up, she smiled at him. "My hero," she said softly, kissing his cheek. At this, Sirius swept her off her feet and carried her outside, where they stood snogging under the stars.

***Two Years Later***

Sirius set Katz down, smiling at her as he climbed up onto their mode of transportation. She wrapped her arms around his middle as he picked up the reins and yelled, "Giddap, Killer!"

And so ends our story, as the crazy newlyweds set off to the location of their honeymoon upon the back of a six foot, bright blue, floating donkey with wings, a 'Just Married' sign spray painted on its rear.

And they lived happily ever after.

~Fin~