Harry Potter and the Rise of the Phoenix

Chapter 10 ~ Home

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These wounds won't seem to heal.
This pain is just too real.
There's just too much that
Time can not erase.

Evanescence ~ My Immortal
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Harry woke up, a soft pillow behind his head and someone holding his hand. He fought back the urge to throw up everything in his stomach and opened his eyes, staring at the interlocked fingers. Ginny. He groaned, letting go of her hand. He couldn't let that happen to her.

He looked into her eyes, pleading with her to understand. He couldn't lose her. Not like that. Not that way. He silently willed her to understand. She was too important. The horrors he had seen haunted his eyes. She couldn't be yet another casualty of this war. Not another name on the long list of those dead because of him! He would protect her the only way he could think of: he had to say goodbye.

Ginny looked back at him, hurt evident in her eyes. It was quickly replaced with anger; somehow she knew what he was about to do. She lifted her hand and placed a finger against his lips, keeping him from saying the one thing she didn't want to hear. "It won't help, Luv," she told him softly, leaned down, and replaced her finger with her lips for a quick kiss.

"He destroyed Privet Drive," Harry replied, not scared or surprised, not even shocked. His voice was full of pain and misery. This surprised several of those around him, including himself. What in the world was so important about Privet Drive that it would hurt him this much to see it destroyed? That place was the opposite of everything Harry held important, it had caused him years of agony, and it had hurt him.

"Then doing that would be even more foolish," Ginny said. "You hated your relatives and Voldemort still went after them. Can you pretend to hate me?" Harry looked into her deep brown eyes and shook his head. There was no way he could hate such an angel.

"I can't lose you guys," Harry said, closing his eyes so that he didn't have to look at her. He heard Hermione's gasp and knew Ron must be somewhere nearby the witch.

"Why do you think you'll lose us?" Hermione asked, her voice both hesitant and eager. She was always curious. If she hadn't been, Harry would have been worried.

"Why not?" Harry asked. "I've lost everyone else." His statement was met by silence. A heavy, oppressive silence. "Exactly."

"Harry, luv," Ginny said softly. "You asked me to show you how to love, way back when. The number one rule for love is this: it is unconditional and unending. You can try to push us away as far as you can, but we will never leave you alone. Don't even try. I promised you that I wasn't going to go anywhere, and I'm not. Harry, there are some things worth dying for, and love is one of them." He looked up into her eyes, the truth shining from them. "You push me away, and you'll hurt me worse than Voldemort ever could." Harry nodded his head, understanding what she was saying. And yet...

"Thanks," he said honestly. He knew it wouldn't be that easy, but he wouldn't push them away. He remembered his old thoughts on that idea. It just wouldn't work. But, what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. "And the Dursleys weren't there, so He wasn't able to kill them. They're still alive."

"Then what's the matter?" Ron asked.

"Tom destroyed the whole block where Harry used to live," the voice of an old man said sadly. Harry turned his head and glared at the headmaster. He had just entered with Thia who walked over to stand next to her brother and sister-in-law. Mrs. Weasley was speaking with the three healers, McGonagall, and Snape. The Weasley brothers were all talking in a far corner, Ron and Hermione were standing next to his bed, and Ginny was still sitting on it. "Your relatives are safe at Hogwarts, Harry."

"Yip-de-do-da," Harry said scornfully. "What about every other family on Privet Drive? The ones who loved their children and never abused them? That little girl... Mary..." Harry choked on his words, fighting to keep the tears back. He was not going to cry! "She's the only one that ever showed me an ounce of love there! AND HE KILLED HER!" He looked around the room wildly, trying to make sense of his senseless world. "She was only six or seven! She didn't deserve to die! No one on that street did! WHY COULDN'T YOU PROTECT THEM INSTEAD OF THE DURSLEYS?"

A ringing silence followed Harry's outburst. He looked the old man in the eyes, the anger burning inside of him wanting to be freed. Harry hurt so much on the inside that there had to be some release. Dumbledore seemed to be at a loss for words. Everyone else was holding their breath, not sure what they should say or do. Harry needed time to think, alone, without all these people here.

"Leave, please," Harry said softly, his voice disguising his anger and pain. "I need to think." Remus, Tonks, and Thia were the first to leave, seeming to understand right away. The others looked at him questioningly. "Please, just go." The three healers were next, followed by the Weasley brothers. Bill returned and practically dragged Mrs. Weasley out of the room. Professor McGonagall left next, sweeping Dumbledore and Snape out before her. Now the room only contained Ginny, Ron, and Hermione. "Please, leave, I need to be alone." Tears started to fall down Ginny's cheek and Harry carefully wiped them away. "Please," he repeated, looking in her eyes. She nodded and left, followed rather reluctantly by Hermione and Ron.

Ginny stopped at the door and turned back to look at him. "Harry, I love you. You know that, right?" He nodded; there were only a few things he was surer of in this world. "Okay."

Ron shut the door behind him and Harry sighed when it clicked shut. He climbed out of bed and dragged a desk chair over to the window. The starry sky above was clear, but over to the west, rain clouds billowed their way towards them. They'd be lucky to get a full day of sun today. At least it had been nice this week. Harry sneered at his reflection in the glass. He was just distracting his mind, keeping it from reliving the events of the night before.

What had happened last night? Wasn't his stay at the Dursleys supposed to keep the wards up for a full year after he left? He had said that the wards around Privet Drive fell because he had turned seventeen. Maybe his stay this year hadn't been long enough. Or Dumbledore just wanted him to suffer. Or He had figured out how to get past them. Or... There were too many or's!

In the grass below his window he spotted some clover flowers. Harry opened it and reached down to pick a few. Conjuring a small crystal vase filled with water, Harry set the flowers in it. Mary, what a truly remarkable little girl Harry recalled. She had yelled at the Death Eater that held her captive, telling him that his mommy would spank him and that he was a bad, bad man. A smile crept onto Harry's face at her tenacity. The second the monster had realized that Harry liked the little one... Harry closed his eyes as the scene played in front of his mind's eye. He had condemned her to a long and painful death.

One lone tear made its way down Harry's cheek. If that demon would do that to a little girl who had only given him flowers, what would he do to Ginny or Ron or Hermione? The rest of the Weasleys? Remus and Tonks? Thia? Professors McGonagall and Snape? Druce? Althea? Bryant? His classmates? The D.A.? Harry slumped into his chair as dry sobs shook his body. This wasn't fair!

"IT'S NOT FAIR!" Harry screamed to the empty room. "I DIDN'T COME BACK FOR THIS!" He stood, throwing the chair at the far wall in frustration. "I WANT TO FIGHT, NOT WATCH THE KILLING! I COULD HAVE DONE THAT THERE!" His knees gave way sending him crashing to the wood floor in a heap.

"Why me?" Harry asked, barely above a whisper. "Why?" His body trembled with grief, but still no tears fell. "Am I still human?" Harry asked the empty room. "I can't cry, only hurt. IS THAT WHAT IT MEANS TO BE HUMAN?" Harry screamed at Gryffindor, wherever the old fool was. "I DON'T WANT IT! GIVE THE DAMN PROPHECY TO SOMEONE ELSE AND LEAVE ME BE!" He rested his head in his arms and seethed. How dare that man mess with his life like this.

"Harry?" Ron asked from right next to him. Harry looked up into the concerned and worried face of his best mate.

"I told you to leave me alone," Harry replied coldly, not wanting anyone to see him like this.

"Well, I figure that seeing as our rooms are connected by the bathroom, this technically is my room as well," Ron claimed. "And seeing that it's my room, you can't kick me out."

"You've been hanging out with Hermione too much," Harry told him, little emotion filtering into his voice. "You're starting to think logically."

"It was bound to happen," Ron said with a shrug. "Are you alright, mate?"

"Just leave me alone," Harry replied, as he stood back up and stalked to the window. He watched Ron's reflection stand and walk toward him until he was standing next to Harry. They stood in silence, Ron looking at the clover flowers in confusion.

"You know, people ask me what it's like being best mates with the famous Harry Potter," Ron said, breaking the silence. Harry looked up at Ron, disgruntled. He continued, ignoring Harry's glare. "I always ask them who they mean, 'cause I haven't thought of you as 'the famous Harry Potter' for a long time. You're just Harry and Harry's life sucks in almost every way. I don't know how you keep going. I would have quit years ago. You've been adopted into a great family and I'm glad to be a part of it. But that seems like it's all you got sometimes.

"When you collapsed, everyone freaked out. Ginny, mum, and Thia had to get us all under control, while Nettle, Quirke, and Zane checked you out. We were so worried, all sixty-one of us. You might be an orphan that has had a crap life, but there are, at the least, sixty-one people who love you, Harry. No, sixty-two. Dumbledore may have made a mistake, but he does love you." Harry turned his back to the window and sank to the floor, hugging his legs to his chest and resting his head on his knees.

"It's just not fair," Harry finally replied. Ron sat next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, silently letting Harry know that he was here for him. That single act broke the dam, releasing months' worth of agonizing tears.

Ron watched Harry for a moment, startled. "Oh, shit," he muttered under his breath. What was he supposed to do? He didn't know how to deal with guys when they cried. He couldn't leave the room, even if he wanted to. Harry looked so miserable and alone, and Ron couldn't leave him like that. That left only one option. Awkwardly, Ron threw an arm around Harry's shoulders and hugged him close, offering all the comfort he could to his best mate, his brother.

Harry cried into Ron's shoulder. Ron sat there, watching the misery his best friend had been carrying flow out of him. Hopefully this cry would help Harry cope with everything. The door opened and Ginny's head peeked in with Hermione's head peering over her. The door started to open further, but Ron shook his head. Harry wouldn't want them to see him like this. He mouthed to them that he could handle it and they should go. Hermione nodded and her head disappeared, but Ginny was watching Harry's quaking shoulders. "Go away," he mouthed again, and this time Ginny left.

Harry wasn't sure how long he cried into Ron's shoulder, but it seemed like it was forever. When the tears stopped falling, he pulled away and just rested his head against the wall, his arms still wrapped around his legs. "I hate it," he said in a scratchy voice. Ron was silent, just sitting next to him. Harry knew he should explain, but he didn't know how. What was there to say?

"Everything seemed... normal yesterday," Harry continued. "Sure, my family's a bit odd, but they're mine," he said with a faint smile. "You beat the twins in the cake eating contest, Hermione got to spend time with her 'grandparents', and Ginny was just happy helping me survive the party. But then... He had to ruin it, and... Now, whenever I remember my seventeenth birthday, all I'll be able to think of is Privet Drive." He fell silent and Ron watched him, worry evident on his face. "I won't remember snogging Ginny in the pantry or going to the Rietvelds' or the party or the gifts--"

"Wait," Ron said, halting Harry. "You were snogging Ginny in the panty?" Harry laughed, a real true laugh and nodded. "I knew it! The twins owe me three galleons!"

"You were betting on us snogging?" Harry asked flabbergasted. Ron looked away, embarrassed. "The same brothers that were about to kill me for snogging her in the living room, were betting on whether or not we were snogging in the pantry?"

"Yeah, so we grew up a tiny bit," Ron said sullenly. "Mind, you, only a tiny bit, seeing as we were betting on it." Harry smiled and laughed at what his best mate had said. "Is there any way I can help you, Harry? I don't like sitting around watching you suffer alone. Neither does Hermione or Ginny. Let us help."

"You have, Ron," Harry said softly, looking at his knees. "Thanks." They sat in silence, the first light of morning shining through the open window. The birds started singing outside, their music mixing with the sound of the fountain in the garden. "He terrifies me, Ron. I never really understood just how powerful that monster is until I was his captive. He still has power over me. Small things trigger flashbacks and I'm there, being tortured again. Or I'm about to kill Scarface. Or Ginny... I live in fear of these flashbacks: when will they hit, what will trigger it, where will I be, who will be with me? I can't talk about it, 'cause I'm afraid it'll cause a flashback. I can feel the pain as if it was really happening at the moment. How am I gonna face Him like this?"

Harry looked at Ron and saw that his friend was just as confused as he was. Harry sat there, his confession hanging between them. He started to regret saying anything. Just when he opened his mouth to take it all back, Ron started talking.

"In all honesty," Ron began, looking at his hands in his lap, "I'm not sure, Harry. But, the thing that got Ginny and me angriest when Charlie started to hint that you were dead... was... we were thinking the same thing. How could you be alive after weeks of torture? And when you put your dad's ring on... and Ginny knew you were alive... we started wondering if you were sane, or if you had been reduced to something like the Longbottoms. Seeing you alive was a relief. Seeing you fight at Malfoy's was amazing."

"And then I almost killed Ginny and Scarface," Harry muttered darkly.

"Well, I wouldn't blame you if you killed Nott," Ron replied. "I also understand that you thought a Death Eater was pretending to be Ginny. In your place, I'd have acted the same way."

"You don't have to lie to make me feel better," he told Ron angrily.

"I'm not," Ron informed him, his temper rising. "If I had been told Ginny was dead and then saw her, I'd think some Death Eater was trying to fool me. The thought of a Death Eater pretending to be my little sister is disgusting. Don't call me a liar without proof, Harry."

"I'm sorry," Harry said. "It's just... What if I had done it?"

"You can't play the 'what if' game," Ron said with a shrug. "You didn't. That's all that matters."

"It's hard not playing when I dream that I did," Harry muttered.

"You can't put up silencing charms anymore, Harry," Ron told him with force. "It hurts me seeing you hurting, and if you hide it I can't help even that little bit." Harry looked away, not promising anything. "Really, Harry, I mean it, you can't."

"Alright," Harry finally said, relenting. "I just don't like interrupting your sleep. It's bad enough when one of us has to wake up several times a night."

"It's a privilege that goes with being the famous Harry Potter's best mate," Ron replied with a laugh. He stood up to look out the window before continuing. "My older brothers used to sit up with me when I had nightmares, so don't worry, your older brother will do the same for you. Not to mention, it gives me a good excuse to make sure my sister is in her bed and not yours." Harry laughed at that.

"Yeah, and if you're in here, then I know you're not with Hermione," Harry replied. "Have you talked with her dad?" Ron paled at that thought.

"Yeah," he said faintly. "It was horrible. I thought he was going to kill me when I asked. But then he smiled and said, 'I hope you survive it.' What kind of advice is that? Really?" Harry could only laugh.

"Good advice," Harry answered. "You want to marry Hermione Jane Granger. Hermione. Remember, the crazy witch who's smarter then every Professor and follows every rule by the book. She could out talk... anyone." Ron was laughing now, and Harry stopped to join in. "She's perfect for you. You figured out how you're going to ask?" Ron went pale again.

"I have no clue," he replied honestly. "I'm horrible with the romantic stuff. Got any ideas to help me?"

"Nope," Harry replied. "I'm just as lost, Ginny's the one to ask. Only thing is she'd blab to Hermione. So you're stuck."

"No kidding," Ron grumbled. "Should I go to one of my brothers?"

"Not the twins," Harry replied quickly.

"Merlin, no!" Ron replied. "Only an idiot with a death wish would go to them! But maybe Bill or Charlie?"

"Not Percy?" Harry asked in return. Ron just glared at him and Harry shrugged an apology. "No idea 'bout the other two. I don't really know them."

"Wish I had a guy like Remus for a guardian," Ron muttered.

"I'm sure he'd help if you went to him," Harry assured him. "Actually, that's not a half bad idea."

"Mmm," Ron replied non-committal. "How's it going with Ginny?"

"Are you asking as her protective older brother or my best mate?" Harry asked guardedly.

"Best mate," Ron replied with a frown. "Nothing seems the matter."

"Yeah, I know..." he trailed off. "It's just... something isn't right, and I keep doing stupid little things that hurt her. Like kicking you guys out. She was really hurt by that. But, I just needed to think, and by the way I'm mad at you."

"For what?" Ron asked slightly confused and alarmed.

"For not letting me think in peace," Harry replied. He waited a second and then relented, adding softly, "But thanks for coming back."

"Don't mention it," Ron said. "So... something's off, you just don't know what."

"Exactly," Harry said with a sigh. "Ron..." he stopped, not sure if he wanted to say what he wanted to say. But, he had to ask someone. "What happens if I don't succeed? What happens if he kills me?"

"Voldemort can't win," Ron said with a cocky grin. "You know why?" Harry shook his head. "Because Ginny will kill you if you let Voldemort kill you." Harry looked at Ron as if the boy had gone insane. "Look, the final fight may be just yours, but we'll help you in every way we can. You won't really be alone."

"Thanks," Harry said softly. "My mum told me that I didn't have to fulfill the Prophecy if I didn't want to."

"Did she?" Ron asked.

"Yeah, both in the letter she wrote me and when I was 'visiting' her a couple of weeks ago."

"A letter?" Ron asked, wondering how he had gotten a letter from his dead mum.

"In her gift," Harry answered.

"You finally opened that then?" Ron asked. He looked over at Harry, the question in his gaze.

"Yeah, she wrote me a letter before she died, and gave me loads of pictures," Harry replied. "What do you think?"

"Do you want to forget about it? Do you think you really could?" Ron picked a clover flower out of the vase and started rolling the stem between his fingers.

"Yes, I can think of nothing better then forgetting about it," Harry answered. "But I can't. And he wouldn't let me anyway."

"Why can't you say Voldemort any more?" Ron asked, staring at the flower as if he had never seen one before. Harry looked at him surprised. Ron usually was the one that let things lay until he was ready to talk about it. Well, not about the Prophecy and it seemed not about this.

"I... I don't know," he answered honestly. He stood and went to look at the damage he had caused. A few shattered picture frames, a huge dent in the wall, and the chair broken. "Maybe it's a bit out of respect. He's as powerful as Hell, Ron. A bit out of fear as well, his Cruciatus hurts like Hell. Don't do that." Ron looked up at him. He had been pulling the petals off the flower without thinking. Several quick spells repaired the damage to pictures, wall, and chair, and Harry sat in the fixed chair wearily. "I'm afraid that if I say his name, he'll hear and..." Harry shrugged.

"He pulled me into his mind last night. I was wide-awake and he dragged me into his mind. Do you know how scary that is? I wonder if he can read my thoughts even now? He could, when I was at Malfoy's. He didn't even have to be in the cell. I guess that's the main reason I don't say it. He's seen the inside of my mind, he knows everything about me, and that terrifies me. A person's mind is the one place they're supposed be free in. And He just..." Harry shivered. Ron put the flower back with its brothers and walked the short distance to Harry.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up bad memories," Ron apologized. "What's up with the clovers? There were some on your desk when we picked you up from the Dursleys."

"I was swinging at the park one day, when this little girl, Mary, came up to me and gave me a bunch of flowers," Harry replied, dead pan. "Clovers, weeds, but it meant more to me than anything else. In a world with so little love, this little girl could see I needed a bit of love... She was an orphan, lived with her aunt and cousin or maybe it was her brother. Her aunt yelled at her for talking to the dangerous Harry Potter," he finished with a short bark of a laugh. It reminded Ron of the laugh Sirius would give whenever someone brought up his stay in Azkaban. "He killed her when he sensed the small amount of affection I had for her. It was long and drawn out. She was kept alive until the very end." A few tears ran down Harry's cheeks. "She showed me love, and I condemned her to that death!"

"Wouldn't she have died anyway?" Ron asked, trying to understand.

"Yes, but not like that," Harry replied. "It would have been quicker, and with less pain. Nott was just going to use the Killing Curse. He was seconds away..."

"I'm sorry," Ron apologized softly. Harry shook his head softly.

"I just want everything to go back to the way it was before," he said softly, ignoring the tears that were still falling. There was silence, both men staring out the window at the sunrise.

"I wonder what it would be like to have a normal life," Ron mused out loud.

"Normal is what you make of it," Harry replied cryptically.

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The day following Harry's birthday was a stressful one for everyone except Harry. He felt relief after his talk with Ron. The adults seemed worried about something, and they weren't telling him what. Ginny and Hermione weren't talking to him, and Harry couldn't help but wonder what he had done this time. Harry saw Dumbledore a few times that Saturday, but every time he entered a room with the headmaster in it Harry would turn around and leave. He wasn't ready to forgive the old man for last night's mistakes so soon.

He was sitting in the garden, enjoying the calm between rain showers. The world around him was soaking wet. A thin ray of light reflected off the raindrops, engulfing the garden in miniature rainbows. It was hard to believe that he was at the center of a war. It was hard to believe a war was raging outside this garden at the back of a Muggle home. Harry shivered, not from the wet stone he was sitting on, but from the thought of Him coming here and destroying yet another garden and home he had learnt to love.

"Harry," Ron said, walking toward him where he sat underneath a huge plant. This was where Ginny and he had had that 'talk' or rather kissed the other day. "There you are. Mum says you need to come in for supper. She's not going to let you skip tonight."

"I didn't mean to skip lunch," Harry said standing.

"I know, you even came into the kitchen," Ron replied, as they started heading back toward the house. "Of course, once you saw Dumbledore you high-tailed it out of there."

"Yeah," Harry muttered. "Any idea why Ginny and Hermione are angry with me?"

"No," Ron paused thinking. "Maybe 'cause you didn't invite them in this morning."

"I'm still angry at you for that," Harry informed him half-heartedly.

"That's what I told them," Ron answered with a laugh. "They didn't believe me."

"I'd be angrier if talking hadn't helped," Harry assured him, silently thanking him once more. They entered through the kitchen door and he grabbed a platter of food and carried it into the dining room. Harry froze when he saw Dumbledore sitting at the table. He turned to leave quickly, but Ron was blocking his way.

"I'm sorry, mate," Ron said quietly, "but Mum would skin me alive if I let you leave. Just suffer through it." Harry glared at him, but turned around and placed the food on the table. Taking the open seat farthest from the headmaster, Harry turned to say hello to Tonks and Remus who were on his right. Ron took the seat on his left. The twins sat in between Ron and Ginny. Hermione was sitting next to Ginny, while her mum was on the other side. Mr. Granger was sitting at the head of the table talking to Dumbledore who sat on his left. Mrs. Weasley was presently sitting in the chair next to Dumbledore, Bill was next to her, and his fiancé was on his other side. Charlie was sitting in the chair next to Melissa, and Thia took the chair next to Charlie and across from Harry.

Harry was careful not to look at Dumbledore, as he wondered what was going on. They seemed to be waiting for two people, for two empty places were in front of Tonks and Remus. The twins were giving Ron a hard time for the Cannon loss to the Harpies last weekend. Harry carefully tuned it out, trying to guess whom the other two people were.

"He caught the snitch!" Ron finally yelled at them, unable to keep his temper.

"So what," George replied. "The Cannon chasers let the Harpies fly all over them."

"Whatever," Ron said moodily.

"Little touchy about it, are we?" Fred teased his brother. Ron turned his back to them and looked at Harry pointedly.

"So, Harry, how are you?" Ron asked loudly, trying to drown out the twins' laughter.

"Never better since the Harpies won," Harry replied dryly. Ron swore quietly (Heaven forbid Mrs. Weasley hear him!) and turned to face forward, just as the door opened. Professors McGonagall and Snape entered. They took the empty seats, McGonagall apologizing for being late.

"Don't worry about it, Minerva," Mrs. Weasley answered. "Let's eat before it gets cold." The Weasley boys dug in heartily, but Harry wasn't feeling too great. He had just remembered the messages he had to give to Snape. How in the world would he tell Snape that? Guilt gnawed at his insides as he realized that he had forgotten to give them at Christmas time as well.

"Harry, have some mashed potatoes," Remus said, passing the dish to him. Harry blushed as he realized he had been staring at Snape for a few minutes now. Grabbing the dish, he piled some mashed potatoes onto his plate and passed it on. He loaded his plate with everything Mrs. Weasley and Mrs. Granger had made for supper.

"How was the office, Thia?" Tonks asked, a huge smile on her face. Thia mumbled something under her breath and then placed a fake smile on her face.

"It was just dandy, Nymphadora," she replied cheerfully. "And if you're not careful I'm going to make you go in as well!"

"You wouldn't!" Tonks replied horrified, ignoring the use of her first name. "That's below the belt, Thia."

"It may be, but it's not going to stop me," Thia replied. "Severus, I think I remember Sam saying that you were a Cannon fan." Ron dropped his fork and the food on it into his lap, his mouth hanging open.

"Aye," Snape muttered.

"Ron," Mrs. Weasley reprimanded her son. "Close that mouth when there's food in it!" He was still too shocked to respond, so Harry stepped on his foot. This caused the boy to yelp in pain and glare at Harry, but at least his mouth was closed.

"What do you think of their chances this year?" Thia continued, looking past McGonagall who sat between them.

"Better than they have ever been," Snape finally replied, realizing that he would have to socialize.

"That's an understatement," Charlie replied. He leaned back to get a better view of Snape. "I don't think they'll go anywhere this year, but if they get a few decent chasers and a keeper worth his keep, they'll have a rather good front."

"They're good the way they are," Ron replied, looking not at Snape but at his brother. It seemed that Ron was willing to discuss Quidditch with his brother, if not with his least favorite professor.

"They got their butts handed to them by a group of girls," Bill replied.

"Excuse me!" Ginny and Tonks replied at the same time. Every other woman at the table glared at him as well, including Melissa.

"Sorry," Bill replied, ducking his head and not looking at his fiancée. "What I meant to say was they lost to a great team, by more points than they would have if they were a decent team themselves."

"It wasn't as bad as the papers made it out to be," Snape replied coolly. "I didn't think the game was half as bad. The Cannon's just need a decent keeper, and they'll be fine. Rangeloff is a hell of a chaser in her own right. And Drewitz will be good given a year or two of training. Those two ladies will be a force to be reckoned with in a few years."

"You were at the game?" Ron asked jealously.

"Yes," Snape replied, taking a bite of chicken before he was asked another question.

"I just think they need a few more women on the team," Ginny said loudly. Hermione, Melissa, Quirke, and Tonks all laughed at the joke. "If their best players are women and they were beat by a 'group of girls,' just goes to show which gender is better at Quidditch." This time all the ladies laughed.

"What's that Weasley?" Harry asked, a huge grin on his face. "I think they only make decent chasers, haven't met a good female seeker yet."

"That's 'cause you've only met Cho," Ginny replied scornfully. "I could take you."

"You're on," Harry replied with a smile.

"No, you are not," Quirke said quickly. "No Quidditch. You'll be lucky if you get permission for September."

"What?" Ron and Harry said together.

"No way!" Harry continued. He looked at McGonagall for confirmation.

"It's up to your healers, Mr. Potter," she said in a tone fully proving she was sorry for the fact.

"That doesn't matter anyway," Hermione said. "You can't fly here, there isn't any protection from Muggles."

"Well," Dumbledore finally said, "you will be moving to Hogwarts on Tuesday."

"Why?" Harry asked, a bit louder and angrier than he meant.

"Though you're safe here, I believe that Hogwarts will help protect your mind from Voldemort," Dumbledore answered, a dejected tone lacing his voice. "Hopefully moving you back there will limit his ability to attack your mind as he has."

"Really?" Harry replied dryly. "I don't remember it ever affording me more protection."

"Harry, show some respect to your headmaster," Thia scolded.

"Sorry, Thia. I don't remember it ever affording me more protection, sir." Dumbledore looked Harry in the eyes, staring deep into his soul.

"I would like it if you let me help you," Dumbledore slowly answered. "You will also be restarting your lessons from last year, including the extra lessons from myself. Your physical exertion will be kept to a minimum, but all your teachers believe they have more than a little to still teach you." Harry glared down at his plate. "What is the matter, Harry?"

"Are you even going to ask if I still want to take lessons?" he replied quietly and seriously, not looking up. There was a silence as the adults exchanged glances.

"Would you still like Occlumency lessons?" Thia finally asked. Harry nodded his head and she smiled.

"You still up to getting your bum kicked by a couple of girls and a werewolf?" Tonks asked with a laugh. Harry smiled and laughed.

"Not to mention Bryant," Thia said laughing still harder. Harry grimaced but laughed all the same. "And Althea and Druce?" Harry nodded again. "And Dumbledore?" Harry stopped laughing and stared down at his plate again. He knew he needed the training, but could he spend so much time alone with the man? "Harry?"

"Of course," he finally said.

"Then what was the problem to begin with?" Remus asked, confused by Harry's responses.

"I don't know," Harry replied. "I guess... No one asked if I wanted to fulfill the Prophecy, and if I thought I could really get rid of it I would. It might sound childish or whiny, but I would just like it if you guys asked me before you made choices for me. I'm seventeen now, so you don't even have that control any longer."

Tonks threw her arms around him and hugged him. "Sorry 'bout that, kiddo! We'll ask next time! Starting now. Once we get you settled in--" she looked at Quirke. She lowered her voice and continued on, "Once settled in, do you want to have a seeker competition against me? We'll see which gender is better."

"You're on," Harry replied, looking at Quirke with an innocent smile.

"I'm going to have to confiscate your broom, aren't I?" Quirke replied with a faint smile. "Just as long as Nancy doesn't find out, I have nothing against it. It'll be good for you even. And I think you can handle it."

"Thanks," Harry said with a bright smile. He returned to his meal, happy with the world for a brief moment.

"Speaking of Occlumency lessons," Dumbledore spoke up once more, "would you consider taking them from Professor Snape? He is a much more accomplished Occlumens." Harry looked up from his food and at Professor Snape. The man had a neutral look on his face, showing neither displeasure nor pleasure at the prospect.

"Would you like to teach me, Professor?" Harry asked politely.

"I have been asked to, yes," the man replied.

"But do you want to?" Harry replied, not letting the point drop.

"I could find a few better uses for my time," Snape finally replied. "But none more important. The headmaster is right, there are few out there more equipped to train you in guarding your mind from the Dark Lord." Harry nodded in understanding.

"How would this affect everything?" he asked after a few moments' thought.

"Meaning?" Thia asked confused.

"Classes with you guys, the others, and regular ones... and Professor Dumbledore," Harry explained. "Will I have to squeeze more in, along with the D.A., Quidditch, and homework?"

Thia looked at the others, surprised. Apparently they hadn't thought of that. "Well, that's up to you. How much more can you handle?"

"As much as I have too," he replied. "I want this over with sooner rather than later. He's had too much time to kill and destroy as it is."

"We can work it out as we go along," Remus answered him. "Just don't burn yourself out, there's no point in that."

"I won't," Harry promised him. "Anything else, Headmaster?"

"Yes," the man answered, rummaging in his pockets. "I was asked to pass this to you today." It was passed down to Harry and he looked at the Gringott's seal. "I believe it is your inheritance. You are seventeen years and a day old today, and it's traditional for inheritances to be given on this day."

Harry nodded and slit open the letter. He glanced at the letter, skimming it. One page was a list of vaults, highlighting certain items. Another page informed him of properties owned by the Potter family. The letter itself said that as long as he was a student at Hogwarts, Gringott's would look after his holdings for him. Sometime before he graduated, a meeting would need to be arranged.

"Can we deal with this later?" Harry asked, turning to Remus. Remus quickly glanced down the table to look at Dumbledore. "Remus, I'm asking you."

"Of course we can, Harry," Remus replied. "It's your property and your inheritance. I'm not even sure what you inherited. James never had a lot of time to sort through his parent's stuff before you were born."

"Let's deal with it at Christmas then," Harry decided. "Is that all, Headmaster?"

"For today, that is all," Dumbledore replied with a slight nod. The conversations returned to normal run of the mill subjects and Harry felt like the spotlight had been removed. The following year promised to be an interesting one, busy to be sure, but interesting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harry sat near the front door, watching everyone else rush around the house. He had managed to find all his belongings quickly and packed his trunk the night before. Something about not being able to go far distances without tiring out had kept everything nearby. Ron, however, was still looking for the quill Hermione had given him last Christmas and the cloak he had worn outside the day before.

"Everyone got everything?" Mrs. Weasley called over the bustle.

"No, Ron's still looking for stuff," Harry replied, leaning back against the wall. He had been sitting there for close to an hour now, but it seemed the pre-Hogwarts chaos applied here as well. Ron wasn't the only one missing things. Tonks couldn't find her Auror hat and Thia couldn't find her Auror robe. Harry had seen Remus looking around for them, but also keeping a close eye on his own trunk. He had the sneaking suspicion that the werewolf had "borrowed" the ladies' stuff to cause some problems. Ginny couldn't find some of her stuff, but Hermione was all neatly packed, and her trunks were neatly arranged across from Harry. She was off helping to look for others' stuff.

"Found it!" Ron shouted from somewhere deep in the house.

"Found your cloak, Ron," Hermione shouted from another direction just a minute after him.

Thia came racing down the stairs looking hectic. She was going to run past him, but he reached out and grabbed her sleeve. "Remus is watching his trunk rather closely," he whispered to her. "You might want to check there."

"REMUS LUPIN!" she shouted storming over to his trunk. She threw open the lid and started flinging things around until she yelled in triumph. "Tonks, I found your hat," she yelled out before turning on her brother. "When we get to Hogwarts..."

"What?" he challenged.

"You'll see," she replied cheerfully. Tonks came running through the hall, skidding to a halt. "Remus had it."

"I should have known," she replied, tossing the hat unceremoniously into her trunk. "I'll get you when we're back at Hogwarts."

"As will my sister, apparently," he replied dryly not worried at all. Ron and Hermione entered the front hall, lugging Ron's stuff between them. "Ginny, where are you?" Remus shouted out to the house.

"Coming," her ringing voice called back, and Thia rushed off to help her. They came in carrying Ginny's trunk a few minutes later.

"Now, is everyone ready?" Mrs. Weasley asked.

"I think so," Harry replied. "If not, I'm sure Remus, Tonks, or Thia can come back and get whatever we left behind."

"Sure, we're just your slaves," Tonks muttered darkly, as she grabbed one side of Harry's trunk while Remus grabbed the other. Harry jumped off of it quickly so they didn't have to carry his weight.

"I offered to help carry my stuff," he replied. "It was you, Tonks, who decided I was 'too delicate'." Tonks laughed as they carried the trunk out, Hedwig's empty cage perched precariously on top. Thia took one look around outside and waved her wand to make her stuff float out. Harry smiled; they weren't supposed to do any magic outside. A Muggle could be walking by and see them, but Thia was in charge, so she could do as she pleased.

"Grab hold," Remus said about ten minutes later, holding out a bent golf club. Harry touched the cold metal with one finger, while the other fingers were wrapped around his birdcage. The other hand gripped his trunk tightly. There was a delay as Remus struggled to tap the portkey and hold on to it at the same time. Finally, there was the familiar pull behind his navel, and then the crumpled mess of limbs and luggage. Harry disentangled himself and stood up.

Soaring before him, silhouetted against a gray stormy sky, was Hogwarts Castle. A calm settled over Harry: he was home. As long as he stayed out of the hospital wing, he was glad to be here. Briefly, a memory from Friday night passed before his eyes.

A flat charred landscape, surrounded by square houses with their perfectly trimmed lawns and hedges, was at Harry's feet. Bodies of the families that used to live on this black block were scattered among the wreckage. Directly in front of Harry was the bloody mess of bone and muscle that used to be Mary. Here and there Harry saw a body of a kneazle belonging to Mrs. Figg. He even remembered a few of their names. Nothing remained of the block Harry had called home, reluctantly, for the past sixteen years.

"You alright, Harry?" Remus asked, gripping the shaking boy's elbow. Harry didn't hear him as his imagination pictured a razed Hogwarts. Huge stones littering the grounds, turrets knocked off, towers pulled down. Fires burning the portraits and tapestries and raging in the Forbidden Forest. The mangled bodies of his classmates laying among the wreckage. Glass from the hundreds of windows glittered in the grass, reflecting the red light of the fires. The smell of smoke burning his nostrils and darkening the blue sky. He shook his head, banishing those images.

"I'm not going to let him," Harry said aloud, determination ringing clear. He was not losing yet another home to that demon!