Summer Happenings

Something about Susan

Harry appeared fairly normal for a boy who was two weeks shy of his seventeenth birthday. His room was as untidy as his hair. His glasses were held together by a piece of tape. The most obvious visible giveaways that Harry was different were the lightening-bolt-shaped scar on his forehead and his pet snowy owl, Hedwig. While most boys Harry's age spent their time thinking of girls, music and video games, Harry spent his hours plotting the destruction of Voldemort, a very real and very evil wizard, who was bent on controlling the world. And since Voldemort was convinced that Harry was the only person who could keep him from ultimate power, Harry had to plan carefully just to stay alive. In fact, if not for Harry's own combination of luck and wizarding skills, Voldemort might have been successful in killing Harry in one of five previous attempts.

Harry was examining his extensive notes while struggling to remember a bit of conversation he had had with Dumbledore, the late Headmaster of Harry's school, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. A loud knock at his bedroom door caused Harry to jump, disturbing his train of thought. Dreading the answer, because he thought he knew who it was, Harry said, "yeah?"

"I need to talk to you," came the reply. It was Harry's corpulent, self-absorbed bully of a cousin, Dudley.

"I'm busy. Go away," replied Harry.

"But this is important. Open up!" And without further invitation, Dudley tried to bang through Harry's locked bedroom door. After about three minutes of this, Harry was so annoyed that he finally unlocked the door and let Dudley in. It was the only way to get some peace and get back to work.

"What is it, Dudley? And make it quick! I'm busy here," said Harry.

"Busy doing what?" Dudley asked with an air of frustration. "It's the middle of the bloody summer. You can't have homework from that freak school of yours!"

"Dudley - just because you have the attention span of a turnip doesn't mean everyone does. I happen to have important things I need to review within the next two weeks. After that, you needn't worry about me as I won't be darkening your doorstep again."

Ignoring the slight on his character (as he usually did when things confused him), Dudley went into it. "Harry - there's this girl... Don't look at me like that! I'll slug you!"

Holding back what he really wanted to say, Harry prompted Dudley with, "You must impress her no end with your sophisticated wit. Do you threaten her too?" Harry really didn't want to think about Dudley's love life. Talking to Dudley was bad enough. But wasting his time on his git of a cousin ... Dudley had about as much chance of impressing a girl as Harry had of taming his perpetually messy hair.

"Well, you seem to know something about these things. That's why I am asking you for advice," said Dudley. "Plus, that old friend of yours with the blackened hand last July got me to thinking. He seemed to think Mum and Dad had abused me somehow - like there was something wrong with me. I don't know why he would say that, but it makes me think there may be more out there for me. Maybe you could help me sort it out." Dudley paused before continuing, "I don't want to just be known only as a bully my whole life."

This stunned Harry. Why on Earth would Dudley ask Harry for advice? Normally, Dudley just punched Harry in the stomach and let it go at that. A thousand moments of humiliation at the hands of Dudley raced through Harry's mind. But he quickly put them aside. Harry had bigger things to worry about, and the sooner he could get Dudley out of his room, the sooner more important issues could be addressed. He would have to save his disgust at his cousin for another day. Nonetheless ... why would Dudley come to Harry? Certainly Dudley's rat-faced friend Piers Polkiss would be a better resource.

"Why me?" asked Harry tentatively.

"I hear you talking in your sleep from time to time. I figure you must know something about how to talk to a girl. The way you mutter in your sleep ... about Ginny..."

"Leave her out!" exclaimed Harry as he stepped toward Dudley in a threatening manner. "You could never understand that." Harry knew that this was true. His feelings for Ginny were hard enough for Harry to understand, let alone his dimwitted cousin. And "not being noticed" was about the furthest from his problems where Ginny Weasley was concerned.

"I'll show you what I understand," said Dudley while flexing his muscles and refusing to be backed down by his smaller cousin. "Either hear me out or I'll thump you!"

Severe anger rose in Harry's head. He tried as hard as he could to not think about Ginny. But alas - it was no good. Harry had felt about Ginny as he had felt about no other girl. The younger sister of his best friend Ron, she had had such a crush on Harry once that she couldn't even speak in front of him. But during the last few weeks of school before Dumbledore was killed ... Harry wondered if he could ever again be that happy.

Harry would see Ginny in two weeks, as her oldest brother Bill was getting married. While he was looking forward to seeing Ron, Harry knew it would be uncomfortable with Ginny as he had told her that they couldn't see one another any more. Ginny had taken it well, but Harry knew she wasn't happy. Maybe he could conjure a nice gift for Ginny to thank her for being such a good sport. He would work on that as soon as Dudley was gone. That thought was a little calming, and Harry got back on the task of getting his cousin out of his room.

"Look - never mind about Ginny," said Harry as he worked to gain control of his anger. And then, wincing at the thought, he asked, "What about this girl?"

Begrudgingly, Dudley lowered his fist. He had loved to torture Harry about anything and everything. But ever since a pair of Dementors had attacked the two of them in the alley by Wisteria Walk, Dudley had given Harry a little wider berth. Harry knew this, but didn't ask why. It was enough that Dudley kept his distance. But the fact that he was in Harry's room was a sign, Harry thought, that Dudley must be desperate.

"Well, she - er - Susan - she's beautiful! She moved to Surrey recently. I see her in the bookshop all the time," said Dudley, beginning to show a dreamy look on his face that made Harry shudder.

"Bookshop? I didn't know you could read!" Harry interjected.

Ignoring that comment, Dudley continued. "She seems awfully distraught about something, but won't talk to anyone about it - as least as far as I can tell. It's as if something really bad happened and she's just trying to escape. I don't know. I can't stop thinking that I want to be the one who makes her smile. And I don't want to come off as a prat either. I figured the way I hear you go on about Ginny ... it sounds like - well - it sounds like she likes you a lot more than you like her ... How did you get her to notice you?"

Harry was bursting inside. The truth was that he really liked Ginny. In fact, that was the whole problem. The paradox of his love life was that if he cared for Ginny, he couldn't be near her. Facing a cruel and ruthless tyrant who would stop at nothing, Harry knew that Ginny could easily be used as the bait in a deadly trap. Harry had already shown himself to be vulnerable to acting rash and stupid when the people he cared for were threatened. If Lord Voldemort knew how Harry Potter felt about Ginny Weasley ... Oh yes - Harry had more on his plate than mere girl trouble. But he couldn't think about that now.

"Dudley - girls are tricky. You must know you can't beat her up to make her like you. What are you expecting to do?" asked Harry.

"Can't you use your ... your 'thing'? You know - make her like me?" asked Dudley.

"Even if I could, I wouldn't do that. I'm afraid you're on your own there, Dudley. Now leave me alone!" said Harry. He stepped to close the door to his bedroom, but stopped short.

Harry seemed to be feeling something very odd. Was he feeling sorry for Dudley? It couldn't have been easy for Dudley to ask for help - especially from Harry. And there was something different Harry could see in Dudley's face. The situation seemed to require Harry to show the kind of compassion that was simply not known or even comprehended in the Dursley household - even if he wasn't entirely sure why.

"What are your intentions with this 'Susan'?" Harry asked tentatively. "What is it that makes you want to make her smile? What exactly are you hoping to accomplish?"

"Well - you remember two years ago? Near Wisteria Walk ... that weird blackness. I felt like no one would ever see me as amounting to anything in my life. Like I would never know 'love'. It was horrible! It was like - "

"Like you could never be happy." Harry finished the thought for Dudley. Dementor attacks were an experience all too familiar to Harry. "Wait!" Harry erupted suddenly. "You told your mum and dad that it was me who cursed you with my wand!"

"I've thought about that," said Dudley. "If it had been you, you wouldn't have carried me home with that old Figg woman. I sure wouldn't have."

"Maybe there is hope for you, Dudley. That was a relatively lucid observation," mused Harry.

"Well, ever since then," continued Dudley, "I've wanted to prove I could be somebody... somebody important. And if I could make Susan Bones smile again... well, I really want her to like me."

"Did you say 'Susan Bones'?" gasped Harry. It couldn't be! Susan Bones was a classmate of Harry's at Hogwarts. If he meant the same person, Dudley would have his hands more than full. Susan was a witch - the last type of person Petunia and Vernon Dursley would ever allow fraternizing with their "Ickle Diddidums", who incidentally also saw the world of wizards as unacceptably abnormal.

The Dursleys loathed the mere existence of a wizarding world - Harry's world. It was just too ... too different. The thought caused Harry's heart to leap. What if Dudley were to come home with a witch? Uncle Vernon would flip!

"I'll have no more of HIS kind in my house!" Harry could imagine Uncle Vernon screaming while the vein in his forehead pulsated.

But something else occurred to Harry. Susan was a friend and a member of "Dumbledore's Army". The DA was a Defense Against the Dark Arts club that Harry had led back at Hogwarts. Harry also knew that Susan had lost an aunt in the war with Voldemort the previous summer. Less than a year before that, that same aunt, Amelia Bones, was had been amazed at Harry's ability to produce a corporal Patronus - the very charm that had saved his cousin from the Dementor. It had been exceedingly advanced magic for a boy of fifteen.

Harry thought that Susan would be better off were she with someone who could at least make her feel a little protected. So why would she choose to be with Dudley? Could he make her smile?

"Surely not!" Harry thought. Beyond how his parents would feel about it, Dudley was a bully - the last thing Susan needed in her life. But maybe ... maybe Susan could show Dudley how to control that particular side of his personality ... maybe even find some good avenue for it. Then again, maybe Voldemort would just quit seeking immortality and ultimate power.

"Yeah - Susan Bones. That's her name," said Dudley.

"Now wait a second!" thought Harry. Certainly Susan won't want to have anything to do with him! There couldn't be anything redeeming in his cousin. Not his idiot of a cousin. Harry loathed Dudley. And yet again, something he saw - perhaps that little bit of Aunt Lily that Dudley must possess - told Harry that this was the right thing to do. In fact, something completely inexplicable made it seem urgent. The mere thought made Harry's eyes water.

Harry spent the next hour discussing girls with his cousin. While Harry was far from an expert, he certainly understood more than Dudley.

"What a sixteen-year-old could learn in a few short weeks of spring," Harry thought to himself. The one part Harry did not share was the heartache of knowing you had to say goodbye - the ache that now caused Harry to dream of Ginny almost every night.

Occasionally, having to choke back the urge to be ill, Harry listened to what Dudley had to say too. It was an odd discussion. Normally Dudley didn't seem to care what Harry had to say about anything ... well, anything other than the pain or ridicule that Dudley was inflicting at any given moment.

Harry ultimately convinced Dudley that the right thing to do when a girl won't talk to you doesn't involve hitting the person she is with. And in the end, the two had cooked up a plan. Somehow, Dudley was going to invite Susan Bones to dinner at the Dursley house. It would be strange and uncomfortable, but he was resolved to do it.

Dudley had no idea that Susan Bones was a witch and Harry certainly wasn't going to tell him. But Harry was also not going to allow Susan to suffer Dudley without some assurance that she would be treated well. There was simply too much suffering going on these days. And the Bones family had already had more than anyone should. Dudley took great pains to reassure Harry that he was resolved to do what was needed to shake off that horrible feeling that Harry knew was the residual of the Dementor attack. It was easy for Harry to imagine how profoundly a Dementor could affect a person. Whenever they got close to Harry, the Dementors caused him to relive the murder of his parents at the wand of Voldemort. Whatever memory Dudley was reliving must have been equally powerful to bring about these changes in his personality.

Harry decided that he would have to have a chat with Susan. She was shocked to see him walk through the bookshop door on a steamy July afternoon.

"Harry? Harry Potter? What are you doing here?" Susan gasped. But she smiled. She seemed happy to see a familiar face even if it did like a bit of a shock.

"I live here. Well, I live here during the summers," explained Harry.

"I had no idea," said Susan.

"What about you? What brings you to this part of England?" asked Harry.

Susan paused before answering. Purposefully, she began, "My family wanted to get away from the war. Losing Dumbledore was a horrible shock. My mum decided I should take a part-time job here and learn more about how Muggles lived. It's been very interesting, really ... So what brings you by?"

Harry was wondering what he was doing here himself. He never would have gone out of his way like this before to help out his cousin. "I heard you were working here and I wanted to come and talk to you," Harry told her while gritting his teeth.

"Well, Harry - I can take lunch in a little bit. I'm still learning this blasted cash register," Susan said, as she scowled at the display. "I don't know how Muggles can stand these infernal ... devices!"

Harry thought that Mr. Weasley would be in awe of Susan at this moment, as he found everything in the Muggle world (the world of non-magical folk) utterly fascinating. Of course, at the thought of Mr. Weasley, Harry's stomach did a somersault. Very soon, Bill Weasley would be getting married and Harry would have to face Ginny. Even worse, he would have to face the Weasley family, in whose eyes he knew he had lost a bit of favor over breaking his relationship with the youngest of the family.

After Susan had muddled through the process of using the "void" button on the register to cancel the sale of a copy of "Money Management for Dummies" to a particularly impatient customer, it was time for her to take lunch. She and Harry chose a hamburger stand nearby and were soon seated at the concrete table on the side of the building, eating their hamburgers from the waxed-paper-lined plastic baskets in which they were served. Susan paid for lunch. Harry gave her two sickles for his, as all he had was wizard money.

Susan began the conversation nonchalantly while they ate. "So Harry - do you suppose Hogwarts will be completely different with Dumbledore - well - with Professor McGonagall in charge?"

Harry was completely unprepared for this. Susan was unaware that he had resolved not to return to school, given the task he knew he must face to defeat Voldemort.

"Well, Susan - I suppose it will be, but I won't be there to know. I can't go back," said Harry.

"What are you talking about, Harry?" gasped Susan. "It's our N.E.W.T. year! You have to go back!"

As he had promised the former Headmaster, Harry had not explained to anyone but Ron and Hermione about the Horcruxes in which Voldemort had sealed a piece of his soul in order to gain immortality. As much as he trusted Susan as a member of the DA, he simply wasn't going to go back on his word to Dumbledore. Harry couldn't discuss his private lessons with anyone but Ron and Hermione. In the private sessions with Dumbledore, Harry had learned much about Tom Riddle and his transformation into Lord Voldemort. Harry resolved to lie.

"I've decided to not sit the N.E.W.T. exams," Harry said.

"Oh come on, Harry. Maybe you think you can convince some people, but you can't put that by me. I know you want to be an Auror and hunt down dark wizards!"

"How do you know that's what I want?" Harry asked with a look of surprise on his face.

"I've talked to Mrs. Figg and she told me. She told me how proud the members of the Order are that you want to catch dark wizards."

"You know about the Order?" Harry asked. He was surprised that any Hogwarts students outside of himself, the Weasley family or Hermione Granger knew about the Order.

"Well - yeah. Mrs. Figg explained all about the Order of the Phoenix. She felt I should know how Death Eaters killed Uncle Edgar's family and what he was doing at the time. I understand that Molly Weasley wasn't very happy about me knowing so much though. She seemed to think that I already had plenty to 'be getting on with.'" Susan paused. In a choked voice, she continued, "Since my Aunt was killed a year ago, I've heard from a number of people connected with the Order. And then what happened to Dumbledore ... They're all scared, Harry. I'm scared too."

Harry thought back to a picture he had seen of the Order of the Phoenix - the group that had banded together to fight Voldemort before Harry was born. Thinking of his parents fighting alongside Susan's uncle steeled Harry's resolve all the more. Protecting Susan seemed more important than helping Dudley. But he had a promise to keep.

There was a long silence before Susan tried to change the subject somewhat. "So Mrs. Figg told me your greatest ambition is to become an Auror. You can't do that without a lot of N.E.W.T.s!"

"Well, I-I've changed my mind," lied Harry. "I have new priorities." This last statement was actually partially true, as Harry's new priority was to defeat the vilest wizard of all time - and to bring risk to as few of his friends as possible in the process. If that meant putting off N.E.W.T. work, then so be it.

"Harry ... you simply must come back. I've thought a lot about this. We really need to reform the DA. With Dumbledore gone, the Order of the Phoenix is just getting weaker. Certainly you can appreciate how deeply my family has been involved in this war - you who have also lost so much. It's time there was new energy infused into this fight. We need to reform the DA."

Harry's heart sank. Voldemort had caused suffering to so many families and the Bones family was right near the top of that list. Susan's aunt, Amelia Bones, was a very clever witch who had worked for the Ministry of Magic, but was now dead at the hands of Voldemort himself. The Muggle papers mentioned it as the murder of a "simple woman who lived alone," but Harry knew the truth. He thought back to the portrait of the original Order that had been given to him by Alastor Moody. He remembered the smiling faces of original members of the order. Moody had described Edgar Bones as a great wizard, and yet his entire family was killed. There was no point in lying to Susan, really. She understood as well as any the importance to beating Voldemort for good. But she also had to understand why Harry couldn't bring others into this fight - his fight, now that the very person who had given Voldemort a reason to kill Harry's parents had murdered Dumbledore.

"Susan ... I can't go back to school. I have to stop Voldemort. And I can't drag others into harm's way," said Harry in an exasperated voice.

Susan stood up suddenly, giving Harry a start. "If you think this is only your fight you can just go and die on your own fighting it." She began to cry and collapsed back onto the bench. "I'm sorry, Harry. It's just that we've all lost so much. All of us. Can't you see that this is not just your battle? W-w-we need to stick together, Harry. We all need one another."

Harry put his arm around Susan as her sobbing subsided. Of course he had to admit that she was right. He knew that the fight against Voldemort would affect a lot more than just himself. And it was ultimately selfish to keep others from helping him at least some.

As he comforted her, Harry remembered why he had come to see her that day. He hated himself for this, but he knew it would work. "Susan," he began tentatively, "if I agree to think about coming back to school ... will you do me a favor?"

After explaining the situation to her, Harry knew that he deserved far worse than the rather dirty look she gave him.

"Harry - your cousin is horrible!" Susan expained that she had seen Piers Polkiss and gang in action and knew that Dudley was with them at times.

Harry had to explain again how the Dementor attack had affected Dudley and how 'Big D' was now a lot more reluctant to pick on children. Harry's only caution was to avoid the Confundus Charm on Dudley or his gang, as the effects would be probably be unnoticeable. At least Harry knew that if Dementors ever showed up in Little Whinging again, Susan could drive them off. Susan could summon a very impressive eagle Patronus, a skill which she had learned at the DA meetings a year and a half before.

"The DA," Harry thought. "I guess that's what this is all about."

Perhaps it was when he suggested she use the Langlock jinx on Dudley should he step out of line that she seemed to come around. She must have understood that Harry was sincere about considering returning to Hogwarts and re-forming the DA. He could also see in her eyes that she realized he understood the sacrifices her family had made in the war against Voldemort. Harry would give it a genuinely good-faith consideration. He certainly owed that much to Susan Bones.

He returned the discussion to the subject of his cousin.

"He's a bit of a git, but he knows that I won't let him step out of line," Harry assured her. "But I do need to warn you about my Aunt and Uncle too ..."

Before leaving, Harry selected a booklet on etiquette from Susan's bookshop (with her help of course) and promised that Dudley would adhere to its every word - or else.

After returning home, he handed the booklet to Dudley, saying, "Read this!"

Dudley took it and looked as though he was going to be sick.

"Read this? Can't you just tell me what to do?" simpered Dudley.

"No I can't. You want to date her, after all." Harry saw that Dudley was beginning to ball up a fist. "And quit with the fist or ... we'll have to see how you look with a pig's nose!" Harry said as he extracted his wand from his pocket. "If you can't treat me with respect, you'll stand no chance with Susan. Piers might be impressed with that kind of thing, but I happen to know that Susan Bones can take care of herself."

"You know her?" whined Dudley, cringing at the sight of Harry's wand.

"Dudley - if brains were transmissions, yours would be stuck in neutral. Just be nice to her, will you? And remember that she is smarter than the average dunce with whom you normally spend your time. You don't want to mess this up!"

Harry soon learned that Dudley had successfully approached Susan and issued an invitation. Well, for Dudley it seemed successful because she didn't laugh when he tripped over the steps in front of the bookshop where Susan was working or when Piers feigned retching at the thought of Dudley asking her "to join my family for an evening frivolity". Somehow, the mention of the prize-winning puddings created by Aunt Petunia seemed to be the clincher. Perhaps this was because Harry had shared the story of how a house-elf had used a Hover Charm to drop a pudding on the head of a guest several years earlier and almost leading to Harry's expulsion from Hogwarts.

"You seem to have that 'expulsion' problem a lot!" laughed Susan.

Dudley did not know about the conversation Harry had had with Susan. She now knew that the Dursleys did not approve of magic and agreed to keep it a secret that she and Harry even knew one another. And of course, Susan had seen Dudley's gang in action. It would be a challenge not to comment on his behavior in front of his parents. Not that they would have understood, of course, being rather blind when it came to their son.

When Susan arrived at Privet Drive, she wore a skeptical look. Harry could tell that she was still getting used to existing in the Muggle world. Aunt Petunia seemed particularly pleased to hear Susan comment on how nice the house looked. Clearly, it had been useful to warn Susan about the peculiarities and vanities of the Dursley family.

Harry was relieved to see that Dudley seemed to be on his best behavior. It was a little shocking, really. Uncle Vernon's comment that Harry could learn a thing or two from Dudley's debonair manner even made Harry chuckle a bit. Aunt Petunia fawned over how gentlemanly Dudley was and how gracefully he was growing up, at which point Harry needed to excuse himself, for fear that the laughter he was suppressing would destroy the mood.

Dudley struggled a bit with his manners here and there. It was to be expected: the entire concept of being nice to a person was foreign to him. But the fear he remembered from the Dementors - of being a failure in the eyes of all, of never knowing love - seemed to drive Dudley in ways nothing had before. While he had always known how to inspire fear (a good punch to the arm generally worked), what was new to him was dealing with his own fears - at least doing so without hitting someone. But boxing was clearly not going to work if he wished to impress Susan. Harry had made this clear.

"The only way to keep a girl's attention is to at least occasionally listen to what he has to say," Harry remembered explaining. "And it doesn't hurt to remind her that she is pretty."

Susan was beginning to smile a little more. Being careful to not discuss Hogwarts specifically, she talked about school and about her summer job at the bookshop. To the amazement of even Aunt Petunia, Dudley listened politely, laughing at all of the right times. Harry wasn't sure it would last, but he could see that, Aunt Petunia's observations notwithstanding, Dudley had indeed grown up a great deal since that fateful night by Wisteria Walk. Perhaps he wasn't destined to be a thug his entire life. Perhaps, despite all previous evidence to the contrary, there were some very unDursleyish redeeming qualities to Harry's cousin.

"Must be the Evans in him," Harry thought to himself. "Something that skipped Aunt Petunia."

The night ended pleasantly enough. Harry resolved to thank Susan for being such a brick. He knew he had to give very earnest consideration to returning to school on September the first.

Before going to bed, Harry found himself looking into the mirror. He saw his familiar face looking back. He saw the familiar scar that seemed to control his destiny and served as a reminder of what he had to do next, although his untamed hair almost kept it hidden. But his eyes seemed different tonight. Harry's green eyes reminded so many people of his mother, Lily Evans Potter. Tonight, they seemed to glow. Somehow, he had been able to see a small bit of good under the train-wreck that was his cousin. Perhaps he was seeing the world just a little bit differently after this night.

His mind drifted. Without realizing it, he found himself thinking of Ginny Weasley. He really wanted to share the story with Ginny - explain to her how he seemed to see things a little bit differently tonight. But then fear gripped him. He wondered if the Weasley family could still see some good in him after how he had left Ginny.