Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman?

Chapter 3: Confessions

As the ministry cars pulled up in front of the Weasley home, Harry decided the best thing to do was try to sort all of his feelings out, and take the bull by the horns. Although he was uncomfortable with it all, he also knew he would have to tell Ron what was going on inside of him. That in it self was going to be a difficult task. Ron, God love him, was oblivious to almost everything "emotional", unless it was spelled out for him. He had thought Ginny having a "crush" on Harry was weird to begin with; heaven only knew how he would respond to Harry's emotions. He was so wrought up, he wished he had someone to talk with about his feelings; like an adult who had been there. But that was also an embarrassing conundrum.

"Harry!" He was startled out of his musings by Ron's exasperated voice. "What is it?" he asked absently. Ron looked at him funny, shook his head, and said, "Well, I've only called your name four times!" "I was saying, after we've unloaded our things in my room, we ought to go down by the lake and go for a swim." "That sounds good," Harry replied absently. Ron observed him once more with curious scrutiny, and asked him what was wrong. Harry looked up at Ron, trying to decide how to tell him. "There's something I need to talk to you about, but I don't know how you're going to take it." " What's wrong?" "Weeelll....let's just wait until we get down to the lake, and maybe by then I'll have the guts to tell you." Ron looked at him, and thought, "Harry acts like he's done something horrible, and that I'm going to beat the shit out of him for it. What in the hell could possibly be wrong?"

They went into the house without another word and proceeded upstairs, only to be stopped halfway up by the presence of Ginny, who was having trouble getting her trunk up to her room. Ron was behind Harry, and at first didn't see what the holdup was, therefore running right into Harry, almost knocking him over. "Bloody hell, man!" "What did you stop for?!" It was then Ron realized what the holdup was, shook his head, and opened his mouth to make a remark about sisters and the nuisance of having one, when he spotted Harry's face. His eyes just about bugged out of his head. He then happened to see the look on Ginny's as well. They were both quite flustered looking, seemed tongue-tied, and couldn't seem to stop looking at each other. No way! This was SO not happening! He didn't know weather to be grossed out, or amused, or both. He certainly would have never thought Harry would ever feel that way about Ginny! Although the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. They had become pretty good friends over the last year, and nobody knew better than Ron how sneaky these type of emotions were, and how they seemed to knock you flat, coming at you like the Hogwarts Express. Harry mentally slapped himself, and thought, "Pull it together, Potter!" "You don't want to give it away this stupidly!" He cleared his throat, and said, "W-would y-you like some help with your trunk?" God!! He sounded like a stuttering idiot! Ginny smiled softly, her brown eyes lit up, and said, "Sure. Follow me this way. This thing is so horribly heavy." Ron watched for a minute more, then grinning, thinking of ways to tease Harry, said he'd see Harry upstairs. Harry mumbled something intelligible, and heaved Ginny's trunk onto his shoulders. He followed her down the hall to her room, and stood hesitantly in the doorway. She looked back at him curiously, and beckoned him in with a hand. She didn't understand why he hesitated, seeming afraid, and tense. It wasn't because her trunk was thrown across his shoulder, although it was heavy. But what it was, she couldn't fathom. He had been acting strangely for the last month, now that she thought about it. He had seemed more withdrawn, almost like something was bothering him, had him on edge. She felt a little hurt, wondering if she'd said or done something to anger him. And today he had seemed more broody than usual. She was quite sure she had done a pretty good job in hiding her feelings from him since the start of their friendship, not wanting to loose such close ties were he to find out how deeply she felt. She loved him with everything that was in her, with every fiber of her being. Becoming friends with him had become at once a balm, and a deep pain, to her soul. For she was certain Harry would never truly understand what was in her heart. Like how much she needed to be touched, held, given reassurances that he felt the same. Plus, although it was possibly wrong to feel this way at such a young age, she wanted to be the one who would proudly carry the Potter name to future generations. She sighed softly at her musings. It would do no good to daydream. It was funny how things worked though. Just this year past for some reason, Ginny seemed to have attracted attention from two other boys. She had been slightly embarrassed, especially with the teasing she had received. Colin Creevy had decided that Ginny was the "ultimate" photogenic goddess, and begged to accompany her to Hogsmeade for the first several visits. At first she had been all for it, hoping to "wake" up Harry. But then Neville Longbottom had become interested, and it was no longer so funny. While she wasn't attracted to Neville anymore than she was Colin, she and Neville had become somewhat friends since she had accompanied him to the Yule Ball two years before. She explained that she wasn't interested in either one of them and only Colin seemed to except the rejection good-naturedly. Neville had truly seemed crushed by her pronouncement and it bothered her because she truly didn't want to loose such a good friend. But things had worked out, and Neville had taken interest in a fourth year Hufflepuff.

She looked back at Harry, and smiling curiously at him beckoned him once more. He came into the room hesitantly and set the trunk down on the floor. "Harry......um......can we talk later?" He looked slightly flustered as he answered, "Sure, how about after dinner, when everything's calmed down some?" She smiled shyly, and nodded looking away from him. "Well....I guess I'll go see what Ron's up to.......ok?" She smiled softly, and hurriedly turned to the door.

Once outside the room, Harry slapped himself on the forehead and groaned. 'What an idiot!' He had the perfect chance to tell her, and he had just stood there like an idiot. Maybe he should have been placed in Slytherin after all! Because he surely wasn't acting like a brave Gryffindor! Feeling defeated, he slowly made his way up the stairs to Ron's room. What he wasn't expecting when he reached the bedroom was the look Ron gave him when he entered. Ron's bushy red brows were raised in question, and his goofy, half-grin was in place. Harry looked at him blankly for a moment, then began to turn the color of a peony. Ron couldn't help it, he had to laugh. "So, Harry, did the talk we were gonna have, well, did it concern a certain red-headed girl?" Harry, uncomfortable, blurted, "Oh, sod off, you wanker!" He sighed as he sat down on the camp bed placed near Ron's bed. "Yeah, it did. I wasn't sure how you would feel, but I knew I needed to tell you my intentions before telling her." "Intentions?" This was getting more interesting by the moment, and Ron loved seeing Harry so discomfited. "Oh, come off it mate! I'm just messing! I actually think it's pretty cool that you wanna get with Ginny." Relieved, Harry let his breath out in a whoosh. "I thought that you might want to pound on my head when I told you. You know. Her being your little sister, and all." Ron smiled mischieviously, " Only if you hurt her, mate." "Not likely!" "So....when are you going to fess up 'bout 'Mione?" Ron blanched in surprise, then turned the shade of a peony himself. Harry sniggered happily at having caught him off guard. "Alright, who's the aggravating wanker?" "Just curious is all. I mean, come off it Ron; you two have been circling one another for ages.......you might as well tell each other you love one another and get it over with!" "You're a fine one to talk! But your right; I'll make a deal with you......" Harry was not sure he liked the gleam in Ron's eye, but shrugged, and said, "What kind of deal?" "Well, we agree that we will "fess up" to the girls and see what happens....I mean, if we don't we're both going to be bloody buggerin crazy by the end of summer if we don't." Harry sighed, agreed relunctantly to the idea, and turned to find his swimming shorts.

Several hours later, after swimming all over the lake, and dunking each other many times, they were lying on the bank drying in the sun. They lay there and lazily talked about everything from Quidditch, to their last school year coming up, and eventually, working their way back to the topic of the girls. "Ron, can I ask you something?" Ron murmured drowsily, then choked when Harry asked his question. "What do you mean, 'How do you know when you really love a woman'?" "Just what I said! I mean, what defines 'love'?" Ron looked at him uncomfortably, and said, " I dunno Harry. I only know that I like how I feel when I'm around her. The way the room becomes brighter, how she seems to have this look to her that makes feel I could climb the tallest mountain....you know.." Ron felt slightly embarrassed by Harry's curious scrutiny. "I just wished there was someone I could ask that has already been there." They lay quietly for a while longer, before Ron jumped up excitedly. "Harry! I know who we could ask! My brother Bill! I mean, he's recently married, and all. I bet he could tell us how we're supposed to know!" Harry smiled, and said, " Let's go back to the house and owl him; no wait, isn't he coming here tomorrow? Maybe we could ask him then!" "Brilliant!"

That night after supper, Harry went on his walk with Ginny, both of them feeling a little awkward at first. "Harry......." "Ginny......" They both laughed nervously. Harry cleared his throat, and tried again. " Gin, there's something I've been wanting to talk to you about for some time now. I- I know I've been a little distant lately, but, really, I haven't meant to be. You see, the thing is.......'Alright Potter! Pull it together!' Ginny , I like you....a lot! And I wondered...wouldyougooutwithmeandbemygirlfriend?" Feeling like quite a stupid prat, Harry stared down at his feet, afraid to look at her face. He was very surprised when suddenly Ginny's arms went 'round him and she whispered in his ear with an ecstatic, 'Yes! I'll be proud to be your girlfriend!' He couldn't quite believe his luck, and feeling very excited, he grinned at Ginny, taking away her breath, and began kissing her. They were both startled to feel an electric jolt go through them when they joined lips. Encouraged by the sweet taste of her soft pliant lips, Harry gently swept his tongue across them. Ginny gasped in surprise, allowing Harry to slip his tongue inside. They were both so very hungry for more, and began to, as it would appear to anyone observing them, devour each other. The delicious mating of tongues made them both hungry for more. But Harry, needing to catch his breath pulled gently back. He held Ginny's face in his hands happily, and gazed adoringly up into his eyes. Was this love? They both secretly hoped so.

"Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman?"

To really love a woman

To understand her - you gotta know her deep inside

Hear every thought - see every dream

And give her wings when she wants to fly

Then when you find yourself lying helpless in her arms

You know you really love a woman

When you love a woman you tell her that she's really wanted

When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one

'Cause she needs somebody to tell her that it's gonna last forever

So tell me have you ever really - really really ever loved a woman?

To really love a woman

Let her hold you - 'til you know how she needs to be touched

You've gotta breathe her - really taste her

'Til you can feel her in your blood

And when you can see your unborn children in her eyes

You know you really love a woman

When you love a woman you tell her that she's really wanted

When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one

'Cause she needs somebody to tell her that it's gonna last forever

So tell me have you ever really - really really ever loved a woman?

You got to give her some faith - hold her tight

A little tenderness - gotta treat her right

She will be there for you, taking good care of you

You really gotta love your woman....