Blondes or Brunettes?

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Blondes or Brunettes?

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James Potter was desperately trying to hurry and finish his History of Magic essay (Write on the discovery of Apparition in three feet or more) so he can make it on time for this weekend's Hogsmeade visit. It was just his luck that Professor Binns had assigned the essay and he had totally forgotten about it until the last minute. He sighed in aggravation.

Just then, the portrait door swung open to the Gryffindor Common Room and two, high-pitched voices, ranting back and forth met everyone's ears. James inwardly groaned. Today was just not his day, first the lateness of beginning the essay and now...

Heather and Jennifer.

"I'm telling you! He prefers blondes, because blondes do have more fun!" screeched Heather, her blonde curls bouncing whenever she moved her head.

"The only thing blondes do have fun doing is being classified as stupid bimbos. We brunettes are under the category of being classy and intelligent. He'll obviously prefer brunettes," replied Jennifer, swinging her dark, brown hair behind her shoulder.

"I wouldn't be so sure, Jennifer," Heather spat, her eyes shining in malice. "You're talking to the person who topped your marks in Herbology. Why don't you go up to him and ask!" she said, pointing her finger to a particular corner.

James was startled that Heather's finger was pointing straight at him. He sunk lower into his seat, praying that maybe the girls wouldn't notice a head of messy black hair protruding from behind piles of books and parchment. Unfortunately, they did...

"James," said a singsong voice. James rolled his eyes and rose once again into a normal sitting position. He was met with Jennifer's face, set into a sugary smile.

"Yes?" he asked, trying hard not to sound impolite. There really was no reason to be rude (well except the fact that they were stalling him from completing his essay).

"We have a question for you," she continued, swinging her hair behind her back again. James feared that she was going to whip some innocent bystander in the face.

"Which do you prefer? Blondes," Heather said, cutting Jennifer mid-sentence, "or brunettes?" Her face turned sour as her eyes darted over to where Jennifer was standing. A temporary, shooting of daggers through vision passed between the two, but they simultaneously turned their heads to James.

James didn't know what to say. He was trying to think up answers that wouldn't hurt the other person, and trying to suppress the laughter that threatened to ring out because of the stupidity of the question. He looked warily between the two, and a thought struck him.

"Why, I find black-haired people most attractive!" he said, smiling exultantly, running a hand through his own black locks. Heather and Jennifer's faces were set to disgust however.

"Hmm...you do know that Snape has black hair, don't you James? You can't possibly find him attractive..."

"Of course not!" James shot back, a little too harsh than was necessary. "I was talking about people like me!"

The twins of terror (a whimsical nickname, dubbed by James' friend, Lily) set their faces back into flirtatious grins. They would have been pretty with that smile...but the look in their eyes scared James.

"Oh of course nobody could resist you!" Jennifer said, giggling in an unnaturally high tone.

"You are, after all, Hogwarts' most eligible bachelor!" Heather added, her giggles sounding peculiarly like mice hyperventilating. James could perfectly visualize Lily rolling her eyes at the pair in his head. He didn't blame her...

"But anyway, answer us...which do you like better? Blondes or brunettes?" Jennifer questioned, giving a suggestive wink in his direction. James thought fast...

"I like grey-haired people," he said, quickly. Heather and Jennifer's faces were one of pure appalling.

"What?"

"They hold such a true façade of knowledge and wisdom. Quite like Professor Dumbledore..."

"You have a crush on Professor Dumbledore? Oh James, that's so sickening!--"

"No, stupid, that's not what he meant!"

"Don't call me stupid. I'm not stupid! I beat you in Herbology and Defense Against the Dark Arts. I'm anything but stupid!"

"Could've fooled me..."

"What was that?"

While their bickering dragged on, James caught sight of his best friend, Sirius. He leaned his head past the fighting bodies of Heather and Jennifer (who had resorted to flailing their arms weakly at each other) and mouthed a plea for help. Confused, Sirius strolled over to where James, Heather and Jennifer were.

"What's going on?" he asked. Heather and Jennifer stopped fighting and looked up at Sirius, looking one hundred percent innocent.

"We were just asking which James prefers, blondes or brunettes," Heather answered. From behind their heads, Sirius could see James shaking his head vigorously and making gagging gestures.

"Er...well, I believe I can answer that for you..." he said, scratching his head.

"Really?" Jennifer squealed. She and Heather stepped forward towards him and looked at him eagerly.

"Well...you see...James actually prefers people with...um...with brown hair. Yeah, that's it. James likes people with brown hair!" Sirius said, stuttering.

"Brown! That's close to brunette. I win, ha ha!" Jennifer said, pumping her fist in victory. "Now, James would you like to go to Hogsmeade with--"

"No! Brown could be anything! Brunette is specifically a really dark brown. The brown Sirius is talking about could be a totally different shade of brown. Right, Siri?" Heather asked desperately, pouting like a little girl.

Sirius cringed at the nickname she gave him. "Well...yeah. I meant light brown. Quite like our friend Remus' hair," he said.

"You see? I still have a chance. James could still go to Hogsmeade with me!" Heather said excitedly. "We just need an exact answer, Siri. Blonde or brunette?"

Sirius looked helplessly at James and shrugged his shoulders. "Er...would you look at the time? I have to go, see you!" He bolted out of the room at an incredible speed. James sunk into his chair again, dreading...

"So, James. Since Sirius couldn't answer for you, blonde or brunette?"

James kept quiet.

"James?"

Out of the corner of his eye, James caught a glimpse of red hair. Finally, salvation had come, as that person approached the three of them. She stood behind James, looking puzzled.

"What's going on?" she asked light heartedly, yet eyeing Heather and Jennifer suspiciously. The girls looked at her, irritated that she had interrupted their interrogation.

"Hello, Lily," said Jennifer, coolly. "We were just asking James if he preferred blondes or brunettes."

Lily looked down at James, who was practically falling out of his chair from sinking so low, and noticed how distressed he looked. Then an idea came to her...

James was surprised to feel Lily's arms hug him around the neck...it was quite comfortable actually. Her scent carried a light dash of vanilla.

"Don't you guys know?" Lily inquired at the two girls, whose faces were contorted in jealousy and astonishment. "James prefers red-heads!"

Getting the idea, James snuggled closer to Lily and nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah...red-heads," he agreed. With a loud 'humph', Heather and Jennifer stormed off, not caring that the Fat Lady yelled at them for slamming her so hard.

Lily withdrew her arms from around his neck. "I just saved your ass, Potter," she said jokingly. James smiled with relief.

"Yeah. I owe you big time! Now I won't have to bring any of them to Hogsmeade," he said. Lily grinned and was about to depart when James took a hold of her arm. "Say, Lily...you just did me a big favour. How about I buy you a drink at the Three Broomsticks?"

Lily looked down at his hand, which was clutching her arm, and looked directly at his face. She smiled again and said, "Sure!" And the two headed off...James' unfinished History of Magic essay forgotten.

He had the whole weekend anyway...

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The End

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