The First Date

The First Date *gasp!*

Narrator: Three cheers! Ron has finally gotten the girl of his dreams aka Hermione. Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray! HIP HIP HOORAY! Now they are on their first date. Hermione has invited her parents to the Burrow for dinner. First, description of Hermione's 'rents in brief:

Laura: When faced with something new, spazzes out.

David: Way, way, WAY overprotective of his *one and only daughter*.

Sound intriguing? Let us watch.

Hermione: Mum, Dad, these are Ron's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley? You may recall in Diagon Alley that day?

David: How could I forget?

Molly: Hello, come on in, make yourself at home.

Laura: *whispering to Mrs. Weasley* You might not want to say that, David runs around naked at home.

Molly: Oh, my!

*Seating Arrangement* Head: Arthur Left side: Molly, Laura, Fred, George; Right side: Ginny, Hermione, Ron, David

*All eating*

David: *taps Ron on shoulder* Repeat after me.

Ron: *unsure* Umm... okay?

David: I will treat Hermione Elizabeth Granger like the *precious* jewel that she is.

Ron: Umm...I will treat Hermione Elizabeth Granger like the precious jewel that she is.

David: Good start. Now put more feeling in it.

Hermione: *just now realizes what's going on* Daddy! Don't bug Ron!

David: But he needs to know how special you are!

Hermione: Daddy, he does, now calm down.

David: Ok precious.

Molly: *showing pictures to Laura*...And here's Ron in the bathtub, oh, he was such an adorable baby!

Ron: Mum! *shrill voice. blushing deeply. Very embarrassed.*

Molly: *not getting it* Yes, dear?

Ron: Mummy, a little voice inside of me is saying put the pictures back in the scrapbook.

Molly: No, dear, it's probably just the wind.

Ron: *quietly to Hermione* I give up.

Fred: Mrs. Granger, would you like a dinner mint? *Irregular for our beloved Gred and Forge to be acting so politely,hint hint*

Laura: Why, yes, thank you, I would. What sweet boys you have, Mrs. Weasley. *Yeah, right* *takes the mint*

Ron: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *flies across the table and knocks the mint out of her hand*

Laura: My word! I have never seen such an insulting and rude boy! *Incase you did not get it, she just contradicted what she just said* Come, Hermione, I forbid you to see him!

Hermione: Mom, look!

*The mint has flown into Ron's mouth*

Ron: *looks at Hermione* BAAAAA! BAAAAA! Fred, what did you do to this thing?!?! *looks at Hermione again* MOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

George: *now on the floor with Fred dying laughing* We jinxed *snort* it so if you *snort* eat it and you see some one you consider *snort* hot beyond reason you will make an animal noise *snort*

Hermione: Fix this! NOW! I will not spend my first date with my boyfriend oinking whenever he looks at me!

Fred: Okay, we'll try...

Hermione: *grabs Fred's collar in a threatening way* You don't try. You do.

Fred: *thoroughly scared expression* Yes, Ma'am. Right away Ma'am

Ron: NEIGH!

George: *Casts a spell on him* There, good as new.

Ron: Umm...Hermione, what's wrong with your mum?

Hermione: *looks at Laura who is on the floor spazzing out and going into a seizure/tantrum* She doesn't take to change quite nicely. When I told her I had a boyfriend she pulled her hair out for weeks. Anyway, if that mint really did do what Fred and George said it would do...

Ron: *blushes deeply* Yeah.

Fred: Moo Mints! Come in mint, chocolate, cinnamon, brown sugar, and olive! Buy them today!

Ron and Hermione: Shut up, Fred!

Ginny: Has anyone noticed I haven't spoken at all in this fanfic? Of course you haven't! You're too busy wrapped up in Ron and Hermione's date that you couldn't even think about poor, innocent, insignificant Ginny! You are such a rude person! Then again, I don't really notice anything about you either. You are not important in my life. I think about school and Harry and family and friends and Harry and what's coming tomorrow and Harry. I never think about you. I don't even know your name. In my life, you don't exist. I'm sorry. I'll try to do better I promise. I'm so glad we had this talk.

Arthur: Enough! Even though I haven't spoken in this fanfic either... oh well! I am now! Now, about those machines that you Muggles like to watch programs on, those teleported visions, what are they called?????

*********30 minutes later************

*Everyone is in different places so Ron and Hermione head up to the balcony FLUFF ALERT! FLUFF ALERT!*

* I shall now start to write correctly*

*not*

Hermione: So...

Ron: Yeah...

Hermione: Why the hell are we beating around the bush? Screw this! *Snogs Ron passionately*

Ron: *Widens eyes, but enjoys this feeling suddenly...*

Kiss: *Gets deeper*

*and deeper*

*and deeper*

*5 million fathoms*

Narrorator: Suddenly, (you all knew this would happen) everybody bursts in. This you would not like to hear about. Shouts of "My precious baby!" and "You took the oath!" slither across the room. Seizures, laughs and catcalls, and unnecessary Good Charlotte singing. Very chaotic. Well, eventually Ron and Hermione got married, had seven red-headed kids and a flying car. Ron has a Quidditch career that only plays on Wednesdays, and Hermione is a writer and the Hogwarts librarian.

THE END