The Seven Year Itch

Chapter 4

"That can't be true!" Julie exclaimed again. "Why am I never that lucky?"

They were making their way down to the Great Hall to eat breakfast, and Lily was telling the others about her 'detention'.

"Because Slughorn's in love with Lily and not you," Dorcas said. Lily pulled a face.

"The mental image makes me sick," she said.

"Mental?" Dorcas snorted. "Come on, Lily, I know what you two did last night..."

Julie laughed as Lily scowled at Dorcas.

"And Potter didn't take any notice?" Julie asked.

"Nah," Lily said. "I went back to the dungeons at quarter to nine and waited there for him. I think he was pretty surprised that everything was clean. He probably thought I wouldn't manage to clean everything in time so he could make me clean the rest tonight."

***

Lily told her other friends how she had escaped from that awful detention, earning a lot of laughter.

Later that day, when she was heading outside for her Herbology lesson, she heard someone calling her name.

"Lily! Oi, Lily!"

She turned around and saw Adam Blume, a good-looking Ravenclaw in her year. He was tall and had longish, brown hair.

"Hi, Adam," Lily said, smiling awkwardly. She could feel herself go red.

Why? she screamed inwardly. That handsome guy's talking to me and I am BLUSHING! Why?

"You know, it's my birthday next week, I'm going to become eighteen," he told her.

"Oh," she said.

"Yes, and I'm having a party in our common room, on Friday night," he said. "D'you want to come?"

"Of course!" Lily said enthusiastically, blushing even more. "I mean-erm- yes, I want to come."

"Great," he said. smiling at her. "And you can bring your friends, Dora and Julia."

"Dorcas and Julie," Lily corrected him. "Yes, I'm sure they'd love to come."

"All right," he said. "Then we'll meet in front of the Great Hall on Friday night and I'll take you to our common room. Let's say... 8 p.m.?"

"Yeah, OK," Lily said.

"Cool," Adam said. "See you, Lily. And I heard how you got out of detention with Potter. Well done."

He winked at her before walking off to his class. Lily practically floated to the greenhouses.

"What took you so long?" Dorcas hissed.

"Adam Blume invited me to his birthday party!"

"Blume? He's good-looking," Julie said.

"Yes, I know. And he told me to bring you two with me! Friday night, Ravenclaw common room!"

"Well, Lily," Dorcas said, grinning. "Maybe he's gay, and he knows he can trust you and that's why he invited you: He wants you to help him with his coming-out!"

Lily glared at her. Dorcas laughed and embraced her friend.

***

On Friday night, Lily lay on her bed, doodling on a sheet.

"Lily, are you ever going to get dressed?" Julie said.

"Oh, Lily's writing diary!" Dorcas said, pinching Lily's cheek. Lily slapped her hand away.

"No, I'm a reporter and these are my notes. My first article will be an inside-report about mentally disturbed students at Hogwarts," Lily snapped, pointedly staring at Dorcas, who snorted.

"Yes, and the second one will be an inside-report about maltreatment at Hogwarts," Lily continued. "Imagine the headline 'James P. maltreats Hogwarts students'."

"James P.?" Julie asked, her eyebrows raised.

"Data protection," Lily replied, and, sighing dramatically, she added, "'Our reporter Lily Evans recently discovered that the DADA-teacher at Hogwarts, James P., maltreats his students'. Is that a good beginning?"

"Yes, but you also have to interview the students," Dorcas said. Promptly, Lily took her pencil case, pretending to use a microphone.

"We asked one of the seventh-year students, Dorcas M.," Lily continued in her business-like voice, "to tell us what has happened."

"It's so horrible," Dorcas cried, feigning sobs.

"I see. Could you tell us what happened?"

"He docked points because I talked in his lesson!" Dorcas screamed. "Gryffindor lost five points because of me! How am I going to live with that guilt?"

Julie snorted, shaking her head.

"But," Lily continued, "I heard Potter's not the only one. Were you sexually harassed by teachers like-Horace S.?"

Julie and Dorcas burst into laughter.

"I must ask you to take this seriously!" Lily said, trying to keep her face straight, "we have to help the students!"

Julie went into the bathroom, muttering something like, "Nutters, both of them."

Dorcas began again to fake sobs. "The teachers are so horrible to us!"

"All teachers?" Lily asked.

"All teachers except Professor Perlman!"

Now it was Lily's turn to laugh. Professor Perlman was the teacher for Muggle studies. He was about twenty-six or twenty-seven and very good-looking. A lot of girls liked him, including Dorcas.

Dorcas glowered at her. "I must ask you to take this seriously," she said with all the dignity she could muster. "We have to help the students!"

XXX

At eight p.m., Lily, Dorcas and Julie were waiting in front of the heavy oak doors of the Great Hall. After a few minutes, they heard someone whistling. Lily turned around.

"Hi, Adam!" she said, smiling brightly.

"Hey, Lily," he grinned back. "Hi, Doreen, Juliet."

"It's Dorcas."-"It's Julie," Dorcas and Julie said at the same time.

"Fine. Let's go."

Julie and Dorcas looked at each other, eyebrows raised, and then burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" Lily asked.

"Ah, nothing," Dorcas answered. "Come on, let's go."

When they arrived in the Ravenclaw common room, the party was already on.

"Here," Adam said, taking a bottle of beer and handing it to Lily.

"Thanks," Lily said, taking a sip.

"Hey, Lily!" Helen called, hugging Lily who had begun dancing to the reggae music that was playing. They followed Adam to the couches in a corner.

"...we just can't rely on that idiot," she heard Benjy saying.

"Are you talking about Potter?" Lily asked hopefully, sitting down next to Benjy. The others laughed.

"Nah, about Cornelius Fudge."

"Oh. He's that right-wing politician, isn't he? Department of Magical Catastrophes?"

"Yes, and I hope he stays there. That guy is a magical catastrophe himself."

Lily laughed, sipping at her beer.

A few hours later Lily was lying on the couch. She had drunk too much beer and now her head was reeling. Adam sat on the floor, next to her. Dorcas and Julie had already gone back to Gryffindor Tower.

"I gotta go," she said, trying to get up.

"Don't you want to stay here?" he asked, getting up as well.

"Nah," she said, staggering towards the exit.

"D'you want me to walk you back to your common room?"

She looked at him, her eyebrows raised.

"You can't even walk anymore," she told him. He shrugged.

"Good night," she said. But he grabbed her shoulders, and for a moment Lily thought he was going to collapse. Then he bent his head and kissed her on the forehead.

"Night, Lily."

She smiled and quit the Ravenclaw quarters. She might have jumped for joy if she just hadn't been so drunk.

Maybe he wanted to kiss my mouth, but he was too drunk and missed it! she thought.

Happily, she walked-or rather, staggered-back to the Gryffindor common room. But then, suddenly, somebody bumped into her.

While she was falling to the floor, she was sure that it was McGonagall or Filch. She saw herself losing her badge, or worse, getting expelled. She opened her mouth to start crying (or at least pretend to) or to tell some kind of excuse, but then she saw that it was-

"Remus? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question," he replied, offering her a hand which she gratefully accepted, as she had problems holding her balance. Damn beer. She and Remus had gotten along quite good when he had been at Hogwarts. "I was visiting James. And you should be in your tower, it's nearly three a.m." Then he looked closely at her.

"You're drunk!" he exclaimed.

"You're quite observative, aren't you?" she asked sarcastically.

"You're going back to Gryffindor Tower!" he said sternly. She rolled her eyes.

"That's what I was planning to do."

"Good!" Remus said, taking her upper arm and dragging her with him. "What if someone else had caught you? Filch, for example?"

"Or even worse, Potter," Lily said dryly.

"Do you still hate him?"

"Is the world still a sphere?"

"Ho ho," Remus said. "We're here. I hope I won't catch you walking around in the middle of the night again."

"I won't," she said, adding under her breath, "let you catch me again."

He shook his head, smiling slightly.

Before she closed the portrait hole, she looked back at Remus.

"But it was so wonderful, Remus. D'you want me to tell you a secret?"

He leaned closer to her, smiling at her girlishness.

"He kissed me!" she breathed. Then she was gone.

If she had stayed, she would have seen Remus standing there with an dumbfounded expression on his face.