Destiny of Souls

Chapter 21: Awakenings

It was just a few short weeks since Harry's friends had come to the castle. Kara ensured he stuck to his routine and the trio of trouble makers was wary of her constant hawk-like behavior. She never found them sneaking around the castle, and the House Elves confirmed for her that they spent the majority of their time in the Library studying. In the evenings, during his free time, Harry and Ron would play Quidditch while Hermione and Ginny watched. Out of obligation, Kara sat quietly on the sidelines of the Quidditch pitch as the two boys zoomed through the sky on their broomsticks.

Snape had been fairly absent in her life for the past few weeks. He would stop in for dinner or an evening and then leave again. Kara knew he was attending several Potions conferences as well as an International Conference on the Dark Arts. What interested her most was that he wasn't attending these as a front for Voldemort, he was actually interested in the topics. He had an honest interest in the Dark Arts, not only for the purpose of Defense, but the purpose of practical use too. No doubt some of this was pent up frustration at being constricted to doing the same Potions day in and day out; but he seemed to show a real passion for the more traditional Dark Arts. Black magic as the Muggles might call it.

She tried to ignore the surfacing feelings of guilt and loneliness she was feeling with him gone. She had pushed him away by taking on the responsibility of training Harry. It wasn't just a role she played when she was in the classroom with him. He was now her primary focus. The role of the mentor to the student with Inner Focus was a serious one. It required a special bond and the contract between them extended farther than just the grounds on which she was the teacher and he was the student. Kara had to now guide her prodigy towards his future much the way Nabokov had with her and Snape. Harry had a loving guardian in Sirius Black, but there were things he would never be able to relate to. Challenges he would never be able to help Harry meet and accomplishments he would never be able to celebrate. She was Harry's surrogate and Snape understood this all too well. It was driving them farther apart than Voldemort ever could. She at least longed for the ability to spend the precious evenings together, to plan their life with one another and she wished for the quiet times when she could hold him. When she would watch him read or pace. When she could see him thinking, his brilliant mind pouring over Potions formulas and his long graceful fingers wrapping around a large book. She missed him.

* * *

The students, Dumbledore and herself were sitting in the Great Hall several hours after dinner just before the end of July when Filch burst in the room.

"Headmaster, Professor Snape is back. He has a Death Eater with him. They're in the front entrance!" Filch managed to say as he gasped for breath. It was obvious the old man had run from the castle entrance to the Great Hall.

Before he even finished his sentence Kara was up and running through the castle halls. When she came to the entrance way she spied a heap of a man lying on the floor. He was dressed in heavy black robes and she didn't realize it was Snape until she rolled him onto his back and stared into his face.

His features were slack and his body limp. He was breathing.

She leaned down and began shaking his head in her hands.

"Wake up Severus. Wake up."

"He wont wake up dearest. Poisoned," Kara heard a semi-familiar female voice say. She looked up and saw Emily Lestrange standing in the large doorway. She too was clad in the blackest of robes but she was much healthier than when Kara had seen her last.

"Poisoned? What kind? Do you know what color it was?"

"Going to pretend we know a lot about Potions too are we?" Emily said in a bored voice. Kara was somewhat confused by this question. What else had Emily assumed she didn't know?

"Please Emily. What color was it?"

"Light green."

Of course, Kara thought. The Elixer of Fake Death. The poison itself wouldn't kill you, but if you didn't receive the antidote, starvation would. She reached into Snape's robes to fetch the solution to her problem, but it wasn't there. Neither was the Veritaserum he always kept hidden away in the rightmost pocket of his robes.

Something wasn't right here.

She pinned Emily Lestrange against the wall and ran towards the dungeons ignoring her protests at being captured. She nearly ran straight into the Headmaster.

"Emily Lestrange. Watch her. Something is going on, but I need to wake Severus up," she said as she strolled past the Headmaster in the opposite direction.

She fetched the necessary solution from his stores and headed back towards entrance way. When she arrived she found Dumbledore staring down the pinned Emily Lestrange. The former student cowering under the intense stare of her old Headmaster. Kara leaned down and poured the antidote into Snape's mouth. She waited a few moments and then began to shake him.

"Severus. Severus. Wake up."

No response.

She leaned down and put one palm against his left cheek and her own cheek against his other. She whispered in his ear.

"Severus. Severus. Wake up or I'm wearing pink to our wedding."

His body shook violently for a moment and then he opened his eyes. She gave a great sigh of relief and looked into his eyes for answers. What she heard made her blood boil. "Where am I? What is Snape's fiancé doing here?"

The man looked up and saw Emily.

"Why is Emily pinned against the wall? Oh no. She thinks I'm Snape."

Kara stood up and walked towards Dumbledore, stood in front of him and threw the imposter against the wall.

"Kara. What are you doing?" The man yelled. He did a perfect impression of Snape's notorious bad mood.

"Hello Sean," she said, bringing a look of shock to Snape's face that was very uncharacteristic, especially under pressure.

"I don't know what you're talking about Kara. You need to get your head checked."

Again, very un-Snape like.

Kara had nearly launched into a verbal attack on Sean Lestrange when a man in a heavy black glided through the castle doors, pulled down the hood of his cloak and stared at his two friends. It was Snape. She looked into his eyes and he returned the gaze. She positively identified him as she heard the confirmation float through her mind.

"Ah. Severus. Perfect timing." Began Emily Lestrange.

"Pretend you don't know I have Inner Focus," she heard in her mind as Emily Lestrange spoke.

"I do believe Severus has something to tell you. Something about him having Inner Focus."

"Don't be ridiculous Emily," Kara said in her most condescending tone. "I know everything about Severus. And he does not have Inner Focus."

Kara came very close to Emily Lestrange and breathed in her face, filling the immediate air around them with the smell of garlic and onions. Emily flinched slightly but continued on with her rant.

"Oh didn't tell her then Severus? Oh yes it's true Kara. We got quite a nice demonstration this evening. Do tell her."

Kara looked at Snape who held a guilty look on his face and seemed unable to speak. Kara feigned disbelief and hurt in an instant and moved away from Emily.

"Is this true Severus?" Kara spoke in a near whisper.

He said nothing, but simply looked away. His body reaction told her everything.

"How could you!" she yelled. She paused momentarily, thinking of the right way to yell at him for something she wasn't really mad at him for.

"Do you realize what this means? Why didn't you tell me? You could have gotten us both killed!" she fumed as she executed a tearing charm on herself. Water began to stream down her face in melodramatic fashion.

"After everything I did for you! After I stood up to Voldemort and made him unmark you. How could you lie to me like this?"

She ripped the engagement ring off her finger, walked over to him and picked up his hand. His eyes were wide in shock. He wasn't prepared for her to go this far.

"I will never marry you!" she spat as she turned on her heel and walked out of the room. When she'd past the corner that turned towards her quarters, a huge smile broke across her face.

She grabbed her Invisibility cloak from her wardrobe and headed back towards the scene. The Ministry wizards had arrived and were preparing to take the Lestranges back into custody. Cornelius Fudge was standing with Snape and Dumbledore as several Aurors chained the prisoners. She approached her fiancé and placed a light hand on his back to let him know she was there.

"Order of Merlin, First Class Severus. Excellent work."

Snape had a boyish grin on his face as he looked at Dumbledore.

"I just hope you realize the importance of keeping them separated in prison Cornelius." Dumbledore said in a firm tone.

"I understand. They will kept away from one another and the other prisoners. You have my word on that Albus. Now I must be going. Good evening Severus. Albus," he said as he tipped his hand towards them and followed the last of the Aurors out of the castle.

Kara took off her cloak when they were out of sight.

"What happened?" she asked as she grabbed hold of one of Snape's hands that he hand curled up into his familiar crossed arm stance.

"We had been planning for the last month of how to poison them and bring them in without them knowing I was involved. What I was not aware of was that Emily had put a poison detection charm on our cups and when Sean drank from his it went off. Emily knew instantly what had happened and she pulled her wand out and disarmed me. I didn't have my wand and she began hexing me. I had no choice but to defend myself."

"How did they end up back here?" Dumbledore asked.

"I Apparated out and she was left with Sean poisoned. She needed the antidote so I presume she used some of the Polyjuice potion we had stored and some of my hair from the bathroom. She knew Kara would save him if she thought he were me."

"Why did you want me to pretend I didn't know about your gift?" she asked.

"In case Voldemort finds out about me, it will be safer for you," he said casually as if he had the entire thing planned in his mind already.

When they had finished discussing the evening's events, Kara and Snape walked towards the dungeons together. It was the first night they had to spend with each other in over a month. They were both quiet as they approached his quarters. He had been distant with her in the past, but he seemed almost to the brink of hatred for her.

Surprising her, he stopped abruptly and turned to her. She was wrong. That was not hatred in his eyes, it was hurt. He looked deep into her eyes and she distinctly heard

"Please do not ever take this off again." As she felt his hand on hers, placing the engagement ring back on her finger.

She nodded and then followed him back to his rooms where they laid down in each other's arms and rested. It was the most peaceful sleep she had had in the past month.

* * *

She woke the next morning with her cheek resting on an uncharacteristically warm, hard pillow. There was a small amount of sweat between this surface and her face. It wasn't until she opened her eyes that she realized Snape had taken off his clothes in the middle of the night and she was nestled up against his smooth chest. She froze, immediately panicking as she mentally checked the status of her own clothes. They were still in place. With a sigh of relief she carefully rose up slightly, ensured his lower body was completely covered and found herself staring at the stark nature of his chest. She had never seen a man in this way before. Thirty-six years of intense study and professional dedication had left her with very little personal interaction, especially of the intimate kind.

She was fascinated by the smoothness of his skin. Kara always assumed men were hairy but had never stopped to consider whether Snape was. He had a small tuft just below his bellybutton that led somewhere down under the sheets. His bellybutton fascinated her. It was a small indentation in his stomach and not at all the gross disfigured hole she would have imagined. It was perfectly framed by pure white skin. Almost loveable she thought.

In all of their time together, they had always maintained an unspoken chastity. Hugging and holding, but never touching or undressing. He had unknowingly moved their relationship to a new level. It wasn't until she realized her mouth was open and she was slightly drooling on herself that she noticed Snape's eyes were open and searching her in a half tired, half amused state.

She closed her mouth and looked towards the top of the bed where his head was lying gracefully against the pillows; a devious look on his face. Her eyes were open like a child who had just been discovered stealing cookies before dinner.

She gained control of her emotions and carefully turned in the opposite direction and moved towards the end of the bed with her feet dangling towards the floor.

"Repulsed?" he asked in a sarcastic manner.

"Quite the contrary," she said, out of breath. How did she become out of breath? She wondered to herself.

He moved up behind her and began kissing her neck and up to her ears. He pulled the back of her robe down far enough to kiss the very bottom of her neck. She could feel his body press up against her back. She dared not look down as he kicked the covers off of himself.

"Severus?"

"Yes?" he replied as he paused in adoring her neck.

"Perhaps you should get dressed?"

He didn't seem to hear her. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her back into him. Her head leaned back against his chest and he used his free hand to move her head around to kiss her. She was overwhelmed with emotion. Her mind was clouded with passion for him and she had to close her eyes tight and remember what was happening in order to shake herself out of it.

"Severus," she said louder this time. He stopped his oral perusal of her neck and left the bed. She heard the rush of clothes as he put them back on. Her eyes shut tight as she heard him walk around to her side of the bed. He lifted her chin and she tentatively opened her eyes to find him fully robed.

"I'm sorry," he said with a wicked sneer on his face.

"For?"

"Assuming that was a look of want on your face."

"That is precisely what it was. You've nothing to be sorry for."

He raised his eyebrows at her. He no doubt wanted to know why she'd stopped if she wanted him.

"I was just unprepared for what... for that."

He nodded and pulled her to his chest in a hug. She found herself intrigued by the experience. Her chin was just inches from his bellybutton, the one she had been so entranced by just moments earlier. What would she give to be able to look at it again, to touch it, to kiss it? Without realizing she had done so, she raised a hand and began probing it through his clothes. She did this for several minutes before she looked up to wonder why he hadn't said anything and saw a very perplexed look on Snape's face. He was almost laughing at her. It was at this moment that she realized his lower body was uncomfortably pressed against her chest and she could notice he had taken great pleasure at her exploration.

"Kara?"

"Oh... uhh..." She leaned back, maneuvered around him and hopped off the bed.

"Sorry."

He continued to give her a very confused look as she nervously paced in front of the fireplace. What was she supposed to say now?

"I should have known you would want to wait. I apologize," he said finally, anticipating she was at a loss for words.

"Oh," she said as she stopped and looked at him. "It's not that. In fact, I have no opinion on the subject Severus. I had never even considered... I mean I know I should have... we are engaged after all... It's just I've never been... and well... I hadn't considered it."

She wanted to hit herself for stammering this way. She hadn't been this nervous since she had to explain to her old Headmaster why she had nearly killed three boys during a flying lesson.

"You've never?" he asked incredulously. "I would have assumed there would have been someone else. Someone at Durmstrang perhaps."

"No. There was never anyone." She said, almost shyly.

He nodded. She paced some more.

"You?" she asked nervously as she paused near the fireplace and glanced at the lilac rose that still held vigil there.

"Yes," he was almost afraid of his answer.

"Oh!" she said, her eyes going wide. But she didn't want to probe anymore; she honestly didn't want to know.

He walked towards her. She noticed his gentle glide, the way his hips moved, and the way he held his head up high. It was somehow all more sensual to her now. Why hadn't she seen this in him before?

She froze and couldn't move as his figure came towards her. Her eyes were big again and for some reason she almost feared him. Not because he was a powerful wizard, or because his presence made every sense in her body become more aware or because he was overall an intimidating man. No, she was afraid of something else now; her own attraction to him and what it was doing to her.

He wrapped his arms around her and rested his head on top of hers.

"I'm in no hurry," he said. The tone of voice indicated he was lying to her.

She looked up, a small smile erupting from her lips. His eyes met hers and she raised her eyebrows. She wanted to know what he was really thinking. He closed them.

"No fair," she said playfully.

"I refuse to let you read my thoughts Kara, lest you hear what I'm really thinking," he said in jest.

"Is that a bad thing?"

He opened his eyes and looked down at her. She heard. "My bellybutton wasn't the only part on my body enjoying that."

She erupted into a small laugh and he leaned down to kiss her. They held their deep passionate kiss for quite some time as their bodies unsurely pressed against one another. She ran her hands up and down his back and to his chest, where she was offered a great opportunity to probe his bellybutton. She could feel a slight, yet wicked smile erupt on his lips as they kissed and his hands rubbed the nape of her neck.

"I want you Kara," he managed to get out as their lips parted momentarily.

She had no response for this. Was she willing to give in this easily?

"I know you want me too," he continued. She pressed her mouth up against his again. She wasn't going to let him antagonize her this way.

He pulled back and looked in her eyes as he detected her diversion of the issue.

"Afraid of what you want?" he said sarcastically, a wicked smile growing on his face.

"I'm not afraid of you Severus," she said as she furrowed her brow and gave him a dark determined look.

He raised his eyebrows in a skeptical manner and stepped back from her a bit. The next thing she knew she was standing completely naked before him; her clothes lumped on the floor. He had used Inner Focus.

In what was almost a comical scene she looked down at her clothes, back to his face and to her clothes again all the while her face holding a very dangerous look. She took in several things. The first, obviously being that she was naked. The second was his reaction to it. His face was full of wonderment for a few fleeting moments until he returned his wicked gaze back at her for a response.

"You know Severus, an ordinary woman would find that extremely unfair of you," she finally said in a haughty tone.

"You are no ordinary woman Kara," he replied as he stepped back towards her and placed both hands on her face to kiss her deeply. It was almost as if he were afraid to touch her anywhere else. She returned his kiss and for several minutes she simply stood before the warm fireplace, naked, as he kissed her with nearly a foot of chaste emptiness between them.

All of a sudden she began feeling very dizzy and at first she attributed this to the myriad of hormones that must be rushing through her. But then it hit her and she pulled abruptly away, leaving his mouth open, tongue out as his eyes shot open. Harry had put on her Ring. She was grasping the bridge of her nose in frustration, attempting to convince herself it wasn't really happening.

"Kara? What is wrong?" he snapped.

"Harry put on the Ring," Kara replied as she moped to the wardrobe and began to put on her robes. She glanced over and noticed he was doing the same.

"If you want to wait here, I will come back as soon as possible," she added as she buttoned up her left sleeve.

"I would never miss a chance to see Harry Potter in pain. Especially with his incredibly bad timing," he snarled in a slow controlled voice.

She charmed her hair as they rushed towards Gryffindor Tower. She braced herself as they turned the last corner, expecting to find Harry crumpled in pain at the foot of the Fat Lady, but what she saw was enough to make her nearly faint.

Ginny Weasley was crumpled on the floor with him, nearly in tears. His head was lying in her lap and he was moaning softly. The front of his robes were open and Ginny had yanked the chain off his neck. She had Kara's ring firmly slid over one of her fingers and it took all her personal strength and both of Severus' hands on her shoulders to prevent her from killing Ginny on the spot for the transgression.