Professor Lupin's Apprentice

XVI: Summer School

I dreaded facing Professor Snape for the next Potions class, and especially for my next Thursday session. When I walked into the dungeon on Wednesday morning, he gave me a feeble smile, which I returned with equal weakness. After our last discourse, he seemed to think I was fragile. I can't help thinking Snape felt he'd saved my life with trying to turn me against Remus. I think he honestly believed that, which was the saddest part of all. He was so deep in denial, and he would never forgive Remus for something that wasn't even remotely his fault. Thankfully, he didn't ask me—or order me—to accompany him for subsequent visits to the Shrieking Shack until we were ready to test my potion, nor was Remus mentioned for a while afterward. But Potions class went on, our Thursday afternoon sessions went on, and life in general went on.

For the remainder of February, I watched and stirred as Snape added ingredients. The first Thursday in March, however, he unlocked his cupboard and told me to retrieve the ingredients myself. This was trickier than it sounds because he had several forms of some of the components. In addition, sometime when I hadn't been there, he'd rearranged the contents, so I could no longer rely on the shape of the bottles or labels. But I managed to find all the correct jars and bottles on the first try by the end of March. In April, he allowed me to mince the wolfsbane petals myself and help measure the other ingredients. And, on the last Thursday of term in May, he let me attempt my first potion unassisted. This was only an informal gauge of my progress, which was good as my first Wolfsbane potion was a miserable failure. Instead of sneering, however, Professor Snape was sympathetic.

"I couldn't do it for six months myself," he said, in an oddly comforting tone. "You'll get it one day."

"I was hoping to get it before term was over," I said sadly.

"Why is that?"

"Well, so I won't forget everything before September."

"We can still work on it over the summer, if you like. You live in the area, do you not?"

I was surprised. "Yes, I do, but I thought you'd be leaving for the summer—to visit family."

"I haven't any family to visit," he replied, shaking his head. "Well, none who claim me, anyhow. I usually devote the summer to my own research, but ... I wouldn't mind spending some extra time working on this ... with you."

"Thank you, sir. I am very grateful."

"It's no trouble, Miss Rhoades. I'm happy to help," he said, again smiling genuinely. This grin was wide across his face, surreal and bordering on silly in its innocence, and his eyes lit up in a way I've never seen before. It almost made me forget this man tried to delude me into thinking my fiancé was an attempted murderer.

Almost.

"I will still need considerable time, however, to work on my research," Snape continued. "Would mornings or afternoons be better?"

"Afternoons, I think," I said. "I'm not much of a morning person."

"Pity. I thought you might be interested in observing my research, as well."

"Oh ... Professor Snape ... I wouldn't want to get in the way."

"You would never be 'in the way,' Miss Rhoades. You are always welcome in my dungeon." His brows furrowed suddenly, and he added, "That doesn't sound very good, does it?"

I giggled. "No, it sounds decidedly bad, but I can still appreciate the sentiment."

"If you'd like, take a week to recuperate from exams."

"If it's quite all right with you, I'd rather start Monday."

He nodded, smiling again.

"Thank you for all your help this term, Professor Snape."

"My pleasure, Miss Rhoades."

After that, I went home. In my excitement, I told Remus all about the offer of extra tutoring during the summer. I thought he'd be happy, or at least grateful. Instead, his face showed only concern.

"Snape fancies you, Wart," he warned.

"Don't be silly, Moony!" I chided. "Just because he feels comfortable enough around me to smile?"

"That's a fairly good indicator. He never smiles."

"I'll admit I haven't known him as long as you have, but I do feel I know him a little better, regardless. I think I would know if he fancies me. Has it ever occurred to you that the man has no friends? And that could conceivably account for the overwhelming majority of his perceived nastiness?"

Remus' jaw dropped. "Perceived? How much of his actual nastiness do you think it accounts for?"

I sighed audibly. "Oh, Moony ... Would it cause you great physical pain to give Snape the benefit of the doubt occasionally?"

He put his hand to his chest and feigned a heart attack, coughing and sputtering.

"You are incorrigible!" I snapped.

"And you're stubborn, but that's what I love about you the most," he said, drawing me into his arms. Then his whispered throatily in my ear. "Admit it—you like my depravity, don't you? Just a little bit?"

I hesitated a moment for effect. "Yes," I muttered, pushing him away. "I'm going to Diagon Alley tomorrow. Do you want to come with?"

"What for?" he asked.

"Well, because I enjoy your company—most of the time, that is."

"Ha, ha, ha. I meant what are you going to Diagon Alley for?"

"I thought I'd pick up some things for Professor Snape. I've exhausted his supply of ingredients for Wolfsbane Potion this term."

"He's really going to want in your knickers if you start bringing him gifts."

Now my jaw dropped. "I thought you were a gentleman?"

"I can't afford to be delicate when it comes to Snape. I'd like to see how much you've learnt, though. I'll tag along, certainly, if only so you can prove you haven't been snogging every afternoon all this time."

"Oh, drop it, will you? Your jealousy's a bit tiresome at times."

Remus and I had to scour three apothecaries the next day to find all the components, and he indeed appeared impressed with the extent of my knowledge. Not nearly as impressed as Professor Snape was when I presented him with the ingredients the following Monday afternoon. He appeared deeply touched and thanked me so sincerely, I actually found myself wanting to hug him for that, although the urge was transitory.

Since there was no grade involved, and I had the means to procure my own supplies, Snape allowed me to prepare test potion after test potion every afternoon. Most of my attempts were laughable, but he never laughed. Instead he dipped a finger into the potion, telling me within seconds exactly where I'd strayed along the path to perfection. From one taste, he knew I had ground this seed too coarsely, or I had gone over half a drop on that liquid. And I marvelled more than once at how well the man knew his art.

When my frustration became too much, Professor Snape would make me sit, explaining some area of his research to me to get my mind off my pique. His research was fascinating, and this helped immensely. He also confided some of the more sordid aspects of his past. He told me how he'd once been a Death Eater, but he parted ways with the Dark Lord and began to spy for Dumbledore. He even showed me the Dark Mark on his arm. When I asked why he'd left Voldemort's service, he said he'd rather not say.

We had many long talks in the dungeon. Since there were no Slytherins around during the summer to overlook our exchanges or become jealous, Snape opened up to me quite a bit. I was flattered he considered me trustworthy enough to tell me all these things, and I told him quite a bit about myself as well. If Remus knew how much we'd talked, he would have been even more jealous than he already had been. And sometimes I thought that, if he and Remus hadn't been bitter enemies, Severus Snape and I might have become good friends.

Then one day in mid-June it happened. I stirred the cauldron slowly, as he circled me, almost like a predator. When asked what the next ingredient was and I answered, he retrieved the substance off his many shelves. He simply handed me the bottles or jars, giving no indication as to amounts. Then he stood close, quizzing me about the properties of the constituents in hushed, barely audible tones. Why was this herb used instead of that? Why was it dried instead of fresh? What would happen if I used too much? Too little? What side effects did it produce? Could anything be added to alleviate such adverse reactions without diminishing the potion's efficacy? The man was certainly thorough, even if he had few other redeeming qualities.

His hot breath lingered on my neck as he spoke. As imperceptibly as I could, I arched away from the warmth. I had no wish to offend him, but neither did I enjoy being this close to him, mostly because I was engaged. When the final component was added, and the liquid began to smoke, which he'd previously indicated was a good sign, I turned to ask for his assessment.

"What do you think, Profess—"

In an instant, his arms were around me, his lips locked onto mine in an insistent kiss. I tried to push him away, but he was stronger than I'd estimated and—as much as I hate to admit it—he was a fairly good kisser. If only for his ardour and the urgent desperation with which his mouth savaged mine, my knees buckled. I groped for support, my hands finding his neck. When my legs steadied, and the first flood of his passion subsided, I finally managed to wrench free from his arms.

"Professor Snape!" I gasped.

He staggered as if I'd slapped him with my words, his usually sallow complexion transforming into a strange tint of orange as he blushed.

"Forgive me—Miss Rhoades ... I didn't—that is—I don't ... I—I'm sorry—if—"

"Professor," I said, my chest still heaving from the shock. "I am flattered, but it's simply too soon. To me, it as if he died ... I'm not ready for another ... relationship ... yet." Remus would have cringed if he'd heard me say that.

"Oh—I didn't realise—or I never ... I'm sorry ... Sometimes ... one can confuse—passion ... for one's subject—with..."

I knew he liked me as a student—possibly even a friend—but before today, I hadn't realised his feelings went any deeper than that, despite Remus' warning. This was a side of him I was sure most people never saw. Not only the awkward attempt at a pass, but the outpouring of emotion that followed. Flustered and embarrassed obviously didn't come easily for the Potions master. Not that they are easy for anyone, but these feelings seemed to be especially traumatising for him. I wondered how to best handle the situation without wounding him any more. Approaching slowly, I squeezed his upper arm.

"Professor Snape ... Severus ... I understand completely, and it's all right. I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression."

He shook his head, still blushing. "No ... I should have known ... I didn't think ... Naturally, you need ... time..."

"It's perfectly all right. I do understand."

His gaze fell to the floor, and he seemed to recover his composure as he looked past me to the smoking cauldron.

"Well," he squeaked awkwardly, then cleared his throat. "Well, that is promising. Now we've only to test your potion. Does your nephew live nearby?"

"Oh! Oh no ... Long ways off, I'm afraid. Germany."

"Indeed? I've heard Germany is a good place for werewolves to hide. Well, no matter. We'll use Lupin again." With a cruel glint in his eyes, he added, "I do hope you're a good enough potion-brewer not to kill him."

My eyes went wide. I hadn't read anything about Wolfsbane Potion being fatal if not brewed properly. What did he know that I didn't? I then chastised myself for thinking I'd missed anything. After all, he wouldn't let me try it on my "nephew" if there were any possibility of the potion's killing him, and he'd repeatedly tasted the potion himself.

"See you at seven?" he asked. Again, it was anything but a request.

"Yes, Professor Snape."

I gathered my bag, and he again let me use his fireplace and Floo powder to go home. When I entered, Remus was on the sofa, reading. He put down his book, rising to greet me.

"How was your day?" he asked, after kissing my brow.

"Moony, I don't think I can keep this up much longer."

"That bad, eh?" he asked, rubbing my arms. "You'll get the potion right any day now. I know you will."

"I think I did today," I said, shrugging.

"That's wonderful news! Why so glum?"

"I just hope it works tonight, is all."

He lowered his head to meet my eyes. "What's the matter, Wart?"

I bit my lip. "You have to promise you won't run mad if I tell you."

"I promise," he said slowly. "What is it?"

"Snape kissed me."

"WHAT?!?"

"Now, calm down!" I said, stepping between him and the fireplace. "You said you wouldn't go mad."

His hands clenched into fists. "That's before I found out—Snape—kissed—my fiancée!"

"He thinks we've broken up," I reminded him very quickly, grabbing his arms. Remus looked as if he was about to murder the man. "It is to our advantage to let him think that. You have to forget about this until we test my potion. If it works, after that it won't matter, and you can thump him to your heart's content. But until then, I'd appreciate it if you keep your jealousy in check."

Remus took a couple of deep breaths. And, although most of him calmed down, a wild look in his eyes still said, "My mate! Mine! Mine!!!" That would probably shock or bother, even scare, some women, but not I. In fact, I quite liked his possessiveness. There was never any question in his mind I was the only one for him, and he was the only one for me. Never did I have those nagging doubts some women experience of "Does he still love me?" Remus loved me with a maddening, animalistic passion. To those who haven't experienced that, I'm sure the thought would be frightening. When one is in the middle of it, however, such passion is anything but.

"The good news is," I continued after he'd calmed down, "I should be able to get some hairs for Sirius off my robes. Will you help me look?" He nodded, following me to the bedroom. As I unbuttoned my robes, his possessive eyes transformed quickly into bedroom eyes.

"How I love to watch you come out of your robes," he said, folding his arms over his chest and leaning against the dresser.

"Not now, Moony. We need to look for hairs and—with black hair on black robes—that won't be easy."

Remus took my robes from me, draping them gingerly over the vanity chair, before gathering me in his arms.

"That can wait," he said.

"Moony—" He silenced me with a kiss. "Why are you always so randy on the full moon?"

"I would have thought that was obvious," he said, nuzzling my neck.

"Do you get some particularly kinky thrill out of shagging me before you see Snape?"

"Actually ... I do," he said between love bites. "Why ... do you ... ask?"

If Snape's breath on my neck earlier made me uncomfortable, Remus' was at the exact opposite end of the spectrum. That wouldn't have been readily apparent, however, to any voyeurs who happened to glimpse both events, since my reaction looked similar. Every inch of my flesh puckered into goose pimples. I also closed my eyes and flushed both times, I'm sure. The only visible difference was that I arched my body away from Professor Snape whilst I most certainly arched toward Professor Lupin.

Remus was quite jealous of my spending time with Snape, although my time in the dungeon was necessary. His human mind knew he had no logical reason to fear Snape's attentions or even his recent advance. But that concept is difficult, at best, to explain to the wolf. I usually indulged his pre-transformation affections since this helped him tolerate my time with Snape much better. Of course, the fact that he was an incredible lover didn't hurt matters either, and he also wouldn't feel up to such trysts for days afterward. But we didn't have time for that now. I would have to be back in the dungeon in a short while, and Sirius was counting on us.

"Don't make me have to use these," I said, lifting the collar and lead Harry and Ron gave him for his birthday from the vanity and brandishing them at him.

Remus took half a step backward and proceeded to beg like a dog, holding his hands up in front of him like paws and panting excitedly with his tongue hanging out.

"I don't mean I'm taking you a walk; I mean I'll restrain you if I have to."

His begging became more enthusiastic, and he added a head-bobbing nod.

"Damn! There goes my best threat!" I threw the collar and lead over my shoulder as he laughed and pulled me to him again. "All right, Moony. But we've only got a couple of hours, so let's get a move on."

He carried me to the bed, and I set my alarm, just in case we fell asleep. An hour later, we had my robes spread on the coverlet, scrutinising the material under bright wandlight for Snape's hairs. Eventually we located some that were too short and unctuous to belong to me. We placed those ten hairs in an envelope, which we sealed for the night before our wedding.

Remus had already been taking Professor Snape's Wolfsbane Potion for the seven days prior to this. If my potion weren't right, however, his transformation would be almost as awful as those before the potion, and the Shrieking Shack would become haunted once again. The week before helped some, but tonight's dose was the vital one. When I arrived in the dungeon, Snape was bent over his desk, writing in his research journal.

"Nervous?" he asked, barely looking up.

"Extremely," I answered, wringing my hands.

"If it smokes, the potion is almost certain to work," he reassured. "I have some things I want to finish up here. You go ahead. I'll be along with the goblet in a few minutes."

I nodded, and left the dungeon on my way to the Shrieking Shack. Remus was there when I arrived and lighting a fire, even though it was June.

"In case you need to make a quick exit," he said, his back still to me.

"Oh, Moony," I said with a sigh.

I knelt beside him at the hearth, laying my head against his shoulder and caressing his hair. He leant into my touch for a moment, but then he seemed to have second thoughts.

"Don't. Snape could be watching us."

"How?"

He nodded toward the fire.

"Not yet, but I plan to employ that method later," an icy voice said from the doorway.

Remus and I both turned, startled.

"Don't look so shocked," Snape said. "You knew I would be here shortly. It's almost as if you wanted to be caught ... I'm not sure why you persisted in the charade so long anyhow. I would still have gladly helped you learn to prepare the potion, Miss Rhoades."

"You would?" Remus asked before I had the chance.

"Of course I would, Lupin! I have sincere admiration for this lady's talent, even if her choice of friends lacks wisdom. And I'll be glad to finally be rid of you."

"How did you figure it out?" I asked.

"I'm not nearly as thick as you both seem to think," Snape replied. "Incidentally, your reaction earlier when I suggested an ill-prepared potion might be lethal was priceless. In addition to that, every full moon he reeks of lust. I'll wager you don't know the reason for his amorous bent on this particular day either, do you, Miss Rhoades? He is 'marking his territory,' if you will."

"Severus, is humiliating Melinda really necessary?" Remus asked in an exasperated tone, rubbing his eyes. "Can you not simply accept for once the better man has won out?"

"I think 'predator' would be more a more fitting noun." Snape's lip curled into a sneer. "I've been meaning to ask you, Lupin, how does it feel to be a kept man?"

Remus' expression turned stony for a fleeting instant but then faded into shrewd, and he laughed without mirth. "Well, I suppose I should tell you, Severus. After all, you'll never have the opportunity to find out on your own, will you?"

Snape's black eyes reflected pure hatred. I thought he might lunge, intent on duelling, any second.

"Gentlemen, please!" I said, stepping between them. "If you're quite finished comparing the size of your wands, I'd like to test my potion!"

They both turned toward me, stunned. I saw the faintest flicker of a smile on Remus' face and I was fairly certain, had he not been infatuated with me, Snape would have given me a detention for that comment. Instead he flushed a sickly orange and backed away, offering me the smoking goblet.

I took the cup and turned to Remus, pecking his lips lightly. "Good luck."

"If this doesn't work—" he began, but I put a finger to his lips. He drank the potion in several halted gulps, grimacing, and handed me the empty goblet. "It doesn't taste any different to yours, Severus ... No offence."

"None taken, for once," Snape replied. "Come along, Miss Rhoades. We can watch from my office."

"You aren't going to lock her in with me?" Remus asked sarcastically.

"No, Lupin. I'm not like your friend Black."

"Ah," Remus said, snapping his fingers. "I walked right into that one, didn't I?"