Out of Body, Out of Mind

A HARRY SITUATION

Hermione sped down the first floor hallway towards the History of Magic classroom. She went through the door only to be greeted by the sight of an empty classroom. Her eyes automatically traveled to the blackboard at the front of the classroom that Professor Binns always drifted through when class began. She went up to it and stepped through.

She found herself in a room that dimly resembled a study. Everything was coated in a thick layer of dust and looked like it hadn´t been touched in decades. There were two ceiling high bookcases crammed with books. In the corner was a lamp, desk and chair almost completely covered in cobwebs. And above the door was an antique clock, but there was no sign of Professor Binns. She glanced up at the clock. No wonder there weren´t any classes, it was lunch time. She sighed as she stepped out into the hall, wondering where it was that dead professors went during the lunch hour.

She made her way towards the great hall, but when she got there she saw only living professors and students. She glanced over at the Gryffindor table but found no sign of Harry or Ron. She had just stepped out into the entrance hall when a student in front of her ducked and a wooden stick flew right through her. She heard a cackling and looked up to find Peeves throwing sticks at passing First Years. She had never been so happy to see Peeves in her life!

"Peeves!" she cried running towards him. He was facing away from her now, laughing at the students as they ran. "Peeves!" she shouted, this time directly behind him.

He stopped throwing sticks and turned around suddenly. He looked daunted as he said, "What are you doing here? You`re supposed to be..." but he trailed off looking stunned.

Hermione felt a ray of hope surge through her. He could see her! She almost felt like throwing her arms around him and hugging him...except he was a ghost and that was impossible. "I need your help..." she began, but she was cut off by a chilling voice that spoke behind her.

"What right do you have to question me, you sniveling excuse for a spook?"

Hermione spun around and came face to face with the Bloody Baron.

"None," said Peeves instantly dropping the remaining sticks.

"Quite right," the Baron said coldly. "Why are you throwing things at Slytherins when there are so many Gryffindors in plain sight?"

"Oh," said Peeves, seeming to shrink back, "I thought they were Gryffindors."

The Baron sniffed and floated away without another word. Peeves made a terrible face at his back and swept down the retrieve his sticks, leaving Hermione standing alone.

She had been standing right between them and neither one had seen her.

She was worse off than a ghost, she was invisible.

* * * * *

Ron looked up from his Transfiguration essay to find Hermione staring dreamily at Harry. She had her chin propped up on one hand and was smiling in a way that Ron could only describe as...wicked. It was a half smirk half simper and it was starting to disturb him. He frowned confused and troubled at his female best friend. She had been acting strangely all afternoon. He hoped whatever was wrong with her wore off soon. He didn´t know if he could take her smiling at Harry like that much longer. Since when did she smile like that at anyone, anyhow? She had certainly never looked at him in that way.

Beside him, Harry threw down his quill. "Hermione," he whispered, "will you stop staring at me? I can´t concentrate."

"What?" she said snapping out of her trance.

"You were staring," Harry said.

Hermione´s face turned red, "No I wasn´t."

"You were," Ron said.

She looked at both of them, seeming to shrink from them. "No I wasn´t. I was reading," she said defensively.

Ron snorted, "What? That unopened book in front of you?"

Hermione looked down at the untouched book and Ron was startled to see tears in her eyes when she looked up again. "Oh yes!" she cried loud enough for everyone in the library to hear her. "Just go ahead and make fun of me. Gang up on me and call me a liar to my face!"

Every student in the library was now staring at them. Even Madame Pince was so shocked to see Hermione Granger causing an uproar that she didn´t make a move to shush her.

"Hermione," Harry said, "we aren´t making fun of you!" But she was already walking quickly towards the door wiping away a tear as she went.

"Honestly!" said Ron, slamming a book shut. "I think Neville´s turned her crackers!"

"Come on," said Harry getting up and grabbing the wand she had left behind. "We´d better find her and apologize."

* * * * *

Myrtle slammed the library door behind her and made her way down the hall, her cheeks warm with embarrassment. Of course she had been staring, but they didn´t have to be quite so rude about it, did they?

And how could she help but stare when Harry was sitting right there in front of her. Close enough to touch. Really touch. She had forgotten what that felt like. To feel the warmth and the comfort, brought on by mere skin contact.

"Myrtle!"

She was dragged out of her thoughts by the sound of Hermione calling her name. An instant later the girl was standing before her, hands on her hips and an angry look on her face that would have been intimidating if she hadn`t been semi-transparent and therefore harmless.

"Give me back my body, right now!"

"I can´t," Myrtle said stepping deliberately through her.

"Myrtle, you know this isn´t fair!" Hermione said floating so that she was blocking her way.

Myrtle stopped abruptly and looked at the girl who stood before her. "Fair?" she asked in a dangerously low voice. "Fair? Is it fair that Olive Hornby made my life here a living hell? Is it fair that I was murdered because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time? Is it fair that I´ve had to stay stuck in this school, crying in a toilet, for the last fifty years watching everyone grow up and move on, knowing I never will?"

Hermione stood speechless, taken aback at her outburst.

"Life isn´t fair, and death the bloody hell isn´t. So get used to it."

"Hermione," Myrtle looked over her shoulder to see Harry and Ron standing behind her, "who are you talking to?"

"No one," she said giving Hermione a sideways glance.

"Oh," said Harry, "I thought I heard you..."

"No," she said flashing them a nervous smile.

Ron and Harry exchanged a look she would´ve been blind not to see.

"They think I´m - you´re mad," Hermione said startled. Myrtle pretended not to hear her.

"Look," said Ron finally after an awkward silence, "we didn´t mean to upset you. We weren´t making fun of you."

"Yes you were," Myrtle said stubbornly.

"No, we weren´t," said Harry. "It´s just...you´ve been acting strange since you´ve left the infirmary. Running into doors..."

"You ran into a door!" Hermione said alarmed.

"...misplacing your wand, staring...I mean standing here talking to yourself."

"Hermione," Ron said slowly, "maybe we should go back and see Madame Pomfrey again."

"I´m fine," Myrtle snapped, annoyed at herself for behaving so foolishly. Hermione was right, they must think her out of her mind. "Really," she said in a softer tone when she saw they weren´t convinced. "I´m just tired, that´s all. I think I`m going to go to the Common Room."

Harry handed her wand and she took it feeling a thrill as her fingers brushed his for just a few seconds. "We´ve got Quidditch practice. We´ll see you later?"

"Mmmm, yeah," she said smiling at him.

"Oh, honestly!" said Hermione beside her as they watched the two boys disappear down the stairs.

* * * * *

Myrtle didn´t make her way towards the Common Room, instead she went straight to the corner of Hogwarts that had been her home for over half a century. She did a quick sweep of the stalls, locked the door and turned her attention towards Hermione. She couldn´t afford being seen talking to thin air again. Not only was it embarrassing, it would get her a first rate ticket to St. Mungo´s in no time.

"What?" she said annoyed, balancing herself on a sink.

"What? You´re in my body! What do you think?"

"I think you´re overreacting. It´s not that bad."

"Not that bad! I´m stuck in limbo while you´re parading around as me and making puppy eyes at Harry! It´s bad!"

"You aren´t in limbo," Myrtle said certainly, as she hopped off the sink and turned to regard herself in the mirror. It was quite a shock seeing Hermione´s face in the mirror instead of her own pudgy, pimply, pumpkin-shaped face. She smiled to herself realizing that for once in her life (or afterlife, rather) she was fairly pretty. And skinny to boot!

"You aren´t going to leave me here forever, are you?" Hermione asked a panicked look on her face.

"Of course not," Myrtle said pulling her hair back and looking in the mirror.

Hermione seemed to give a sigh of relief.

"You won´t live forever. Eventually you´re body will die and since you aren`t a ghost you`ll die with it."

There was a shocked silence and after a moment Myrtle stopped in her hair arranging to sneak a glance over at Hermione. She was crying. Myrtle put a hand on her hip and looked at Hermione in surprise. "Why are you crying?"

"I might as well not exist," Hermione sniffled. "No one can hear me, no one can see me. I´ll never be able to read, or write or talk to my friends, or see my parents. What did I ever do to you to deserve this?"

Myrtle stared at her speechless for a moment. She had never in her whole life (or afterlife) made someone cry. It had always been others that had made her cry in the past. It saddened her and there was a part of her that felt sympathetic tears just a blink away. She knew what it felt like, being invisible to others.

But there was something else there too, in making someone cry. A sort of power that made her feel stronger. A meanness that made her suddenly want revenge for all those years she had been invisible to pretty girls just like Hermione. This was her opportunity to make things right. This time she wouldn´t have to deal with Olive Hornby, or wretched glasses, or acne, or with everyone hating her. This time she would have a chance.

"Nothing no one else didn`t do," Myrtle said at last. "Stop crying. I won´t be stuck in your body forever. Once I complete my unfinished business I´ll willingly give it back to you."

"Really?" said Hermione looking up at her with wet eyes.

"Yes," said Myrtle.

"What unfinished business?"

"I died when I was your age. Much too young to have really lived. I never did the one thing every girl our age should do."

Hermione frowned at her, "What?"

"Not much of a romantic are you?"

"What? You mean fall in love?" Hermione said startled.

Myrtle gave a short laugh, "No. I fell in love, but I wasn´t loved back."

"Then what?"

"My unfinished business is that I have to be loved by someone I love."

Hermione´s eyes grew wide, "Surely you don´t mean..."

Myrtle smiled, "I want Harry Potter to fall in helplessly, hopelessly, falling over himself in love with me."

"But he wouldn´t be in love with you, he´d be in love with me!"

"But I would be you, so it would be me."

"Myrtle, you know that´s impossible!" Hermione said, her voice higher than usual.

"Impossible that anyone would love me?" Myrtle said feeling a little peeved at her nerve.

"No," Hermione said quickly, "I don´t mean that. I mean, impossible that Harry would fall in love with me. I´m his best friend. He´s never even shown an interest..."

"Make him."

"Make him!" Hermione said, clearly frustrated. "I can´t even pick up a book, how am I supposed to make him do anything?"

Myrtle sighed, "Do you want your body back or not?"

"Myrtle...I can`t!"

"It doesn´t seem to me that you´ve got much of a choice," Myrtle said, making her way towards the door. "Find me when you have a plan."

She shut the door behind her feeling drunk on the knowledge that for the first time ever she was the one wielding all the power. It was a nice feeling.

* * * * *