Oblivious to the Obvious

Hermione sat alone in the common room, staring into the dying embers of the once roaring fire. She hates doing this, she really does, but sometimes we're required to do things we don't want to do, and she didn't want to contemplate existence, she really didn't. She was lucky tonight, because at that moment, Professor McGonagall walked into the common room.

"Professor!" Hermione said, just a little too loudly, as she jumped to her feet. "What are you doing here?"

"Ms. Granger, I am the head of Gryffindor House, I have a right to be here. If you must know, I came here to check on you."

"How did you know I would be up?"

"I've seen the concern in your eyes. I know that you're worried to death about Harry and Ron. After what happened at dinner, I knew you would be up."

"It's that obvious?"

"Yes, it is. It's also obvious that you were up this evening to try to protect Harry. I know you've been studying protection charms, defensive hexes, warding. You suspect that something bad is going to happen...and you're right."

Hermione looked up suddenly, and stared straight into McGonagall's eyes, searching for something, something that the professor couldn't identify.

"What do you mean? What's wrong?"

McGonagall told her, and Hermione collapsed.

********

"Hey Harry, do you remember that time when you and Hermione were...and I walked in...and we..."

"Yeah. I also seem to remember you vowing to never mention it. Ever."

"Oh yeah."

"What about that time in the showers? Do you remember when Fred and George were...?"

"RON!" Harry shouted. "Are you all right? Why are you suddenly bringing all this up?"

"Well, Fred and George just came out, and I was thinking that it could be genetic, ya know? That made me remember those other times. I can't remember a time when I was with a girl..."

"There was Padma."

"She really did need help carrying her books."

"Oh. What about Lavender?"

"Her underwear bit me. Her father is apparently very good with charms, and VERY overprotective, so I ended it with her."

"Why don't you tell me these things?"

"You never ask."

"Fine, fine. What about Hannah?"

"See, she and Padma had a Thing."

"A thing?"

"No, a Thing."

"Oh. You two hung out a lot, didn't you?"

"Actually, the three of us hung out a lot, but I kind of just watched."

"You watched?"

"Yeah."

"What about yesterday when you went off to meet that girl who sent you the anonymous note?"

"That girl was Dean. It was awkward. I ran away."

"You really should be more open-minded."

"HARRY! You know that I never tease Dean, and that I don't have a problem with him being...you know. It's just really creepy to think that he wanted me to..."

"I was just kidding, calm down."

"Oh."

"Fine, so that didn't work out. What about that time when you and Parvati went to the astronomy tower at two in the morning?"

"That? That was special. That was...great." Ron sighed as he remembered Parvati's special touch.

"See, there's a good example."

"Yeah, but that's the only one I can remember. You should know that. I told you how special that was."

"Yes, I remember. I told Hermione that I wanted a special moment. It's amazing what she can do. Did I tell you about last Thursday?"

"Last Thursday? I thought you two went to research?"

"You'd be amazed at the perverse ways she can use the word 'research'."

"Oh...why are we having this discussion again?"

"Because you're trying to prove you're not gay."

"Ok, I've done that. And I know you're not gay, although I don't think you should tell Neville that, he's still hoping."

"Neville?"

"Didn't you know?"

"Obviously not."

"You don't want to know why he wanted you picture, then.... it definitely wasn't for his scrapbook."

"NEVILLE!" Harry shrieked as he ran back up towards the castle.

Poor Neville. Up until today he'd benefited from Harry's ability to be completely oblivious to the obvious. Oh well, Neville deserved it anyway for what he'd done to Ron, giving him a used flobberworm.