Swept From the Past

Chapter 45: Harry's Spring Ball -- part one

Harry and Ron were on the way to the library when Harry noticed Hagrid at the end of the corridor. Hagrid's face was scratched and he had a bruise over his eye.

"Hagrid!" Harry exclaimed, stepping forward to the half-giant.

"Hullo," Hagrid said.

"What happened to you?" Harry asked, thinking of all the animals Hagrid kept in his hut. What creature had Hagrid adopted now?

"You look awful," Ron commented.

"Em," Hagrid replied, "it's nothing. Jus' Grawp. Yeh know him. Always playin' with everything. Reckon he's a little teasin' these times. Outta brin' friends ter play with him, but Dumbledore wouldn' agree. Says it'd be dangerous for people."

"You're kidding?" Ron replied ironically.

"Dunno why he thinks that," Hagrid responded. "Grawp's as sweet as a lamb. Wouldn' hurt anyone."

Grawp wouldn't hurt anyone? Probably not on purpose, but it wouldn't make any difference!

"What about your bruises?" Harry asked.

"Sometimes, he can' control his strength," Hagrid replied. "Outta see when he finds a new game. Looks so happy!"

A new game? What? Throwing trees on people? Harry could imagine a happy Grawp destroying the forest for fun. The centaurs must be thrilled to have him in the forest...

Harry cast a quick glance at Ron. From his expression, Harry could tell he agreed. Harry could almost hear him say 'mental' in his head. Yes, Hagrid was a bit... naïve when it came to Grawp or any other creature he adopted.

"So," Hagrid said, "ready for the Spring Ball?"

"Yeah," Harry replied.

"No," Ron responded.

The Spring Ball was in three days. The whole school was completely agitated. Everyone was talking about it. Harry was anxious, but happy about the event. For once, he would go with the girl he wanted. Ron's opinion was quite different. He was always complaining about the Ball. He kept saying the Ball was the most awful thing that had ever happened at Hogwarts -- except for Marietta and the Slytherins.

"Wanted ter go with Olympe, er... I mean Madame Maxime," Hagrid said, "but she'll have an important staff meeting in Beauxbatons. Couldn' put it off." He looked disappointed.

"Oh," Harry said, not knowing what to reply. "Sorry."

"Think I'll stay with Fang," Hagrid said.

"Fang?" Ron repeated, a grimace on his face.

"Yes, Fang," Hagrid replied. "The poor dog's depressed."

"Depressed?" Harry asked.

"For almost two months," Hagrid said. "Since the day the girls fought over that Alphonso..."

Harry frowned. He remembered that Ginny had fought too.

"Why would he care about girls fighting?" Ron asked. "He's a dog!"

"It's not 'bout the girls," Hagrid replied, a look of irritation on his face. "He ran after a cat and I found him in a bush o' brambles. He's been traumatised! Poor Fang, he barely leaves the hut now. Seems scared o' everything. I've asked Poppy, but she said she didn' know what ter do. He's even scared o' me!" Hagrid sniffed.

"Er," Harry said, "I'm sure Madam Pomfrey will find a solution."

"Yeah," Ron added. "If she can give Malfoy his hair back, she can heal a dog..."

"Hope so," Hagrid said. "I'll ask Flitwick fer advice. Loves dogs. Maybe he'll know something ter do?"

Harry repressed a smirk. The idea of the little man examining a big dog like Fang was funny.

"See yeh in yer next Care o' Magical Creatures class," Hagrid said. "Must go now."

"Bye," the boys replied.

"Er," Harry added, "say hello to Fang for us!"

Hagrid nodded and left.

"A depressed dog," Ron said when they were away. He rolled his eyes. "Fang's always been a coward."

"You know Hagrid," Harry responded. "He's kind of... er... overprotective when it's about animals and strange creatures. Remember Norbert...

"Yeah," Ron replied. "And Fluffy, the three-headed dog who almost ate us... Or Aragog..." He grimaced. "I should ask Burns to teach me a good spell to repulse spiders. They're disgusting!"

"Yeah," Harry replied.

Burns... Harry had often thought of her and the memories she wanted to give to him. He had wanted to speak to her ever since he had learnt about those memories. But between asking Ginny to the Ball and dealing with Ron's strange attitude, he had neither the time nor the courage to speak with Burns.

Harry didn't know how he could bring up the subject. How could he say 'Hello, I broke into your chambers and discovered you had a present for me'? Burns would be furious and could have a crisis...

But Harry had to say something. He felt guilty. His mother wouldn't have wanted to see her best friend that way. Although he hadn't especially appreciated the scene he'd witnessed in the Pensieve -- come on, seeing someone kissing Snape -- Harry had felt pity for Katarina. The stern, cold, miserable Burns he knew must have suffered a lot. And Harry didn't want to add to her burden. Taking her memories? No. It wasn't fair.

"I have something I need to do," Harry said to Ron. "I'll find you in the library when it's over."

"Okay," Ron replied. "I hope it's hexing Marietta."

Harry laughed. "I'll think about it," he replied. Then he went to the Defence Against the Dark Arts class, hoping that he'd find Burns. He took a deep breath and entered the empty classroom. Then he knocked at Burns' office door.

"Come in," she said.

Harry gulped and entered.

Burns was seated at her desk, writing. She raised her head to stare at Harry and arched an eyebrow.

"Master Potter?" she asked.

"Er," Harry said, "Professor Burns..."

"So?" Burns asked.

Harry felt very ill at ease. He stood in front of Burns, unable to reply. His stomach ached. What would Burns say? How would she react? Taken by a rush of courage, he spoke. "Idonwantyourpensieve," he said in one breath.

"What did you say?" Burns asked. She frowned.

"I... I don't want your Pensieve," Harry repeated more clearly. He gulped again.

"My Pensieve?" Burns snapped. "What Pensieve?"

"The Pensieve you kept for me," Harry continued bravely. "I..." He gasped for air. "I don't want your memories of my parents."

It was hard for Harry to utter that sentence. He gave those memories up. He gave his parents up, and the hope he would know more about them. He swallowed a painful lump in his throat.

"And you know the existence of that Pensieve because...?" Burns hissed.

"Because I entered your chambers," Harry responded bravely. "I wanted to know the truth. I've read the letter."

Burns' jaw clenched. "So you entered my chambers, although it was forbidden and put your nose into my stuff. And you guessed my password. I suppose that you are proud of yourself. I should give you detention, but I don't think that the Wizarding World would be happy if you were transformed into a vampire." She paused. "Leave my office now."

What? Burns wanted Harry to leave? He hadn't expected such a reaction. He had thought she would yell at him, punish him. He hadn't expected disdain and disregard...

"But--" he said.

"There's no 'but,'" Burns retorted. "You don't want my Pensieve. Fine. It won't change anything. I'll do as I had planned. It's not my problem if you don't like my present..." She motioned for Harry to leave.

Harry felt infuriated. "You don't understand!" he exclaimed. "This present... it's too much! I don't want you to hurt yourself because of me! I don't want my mother's best friend to die! This is unfair!"

"Life is unfair," Burns snapped. "That's all."

"You can't say that!" Harry shouted. "You're alive!"

"Not for long," Burns replied. "Fortunately."

"You gave me the photo album," Harry exclaimed, "you gave up your memories for me! You wrote on the letter that, in other circumstances, you would have taken care of me as if I was your son! What circumstances? What happened? Why didn't you--" He wanted Burns to explain why she hadn't taken care of him.

"Why didn't I what?" Burns snapped. "Take care of you at the time?" Her eyes flashed. "Do you think I had enough strength to take care of anyone? I didn't have strength for myself!" She paused. "I'm indebted to Sirius Black because he saved my life. It's a magical link. But I would have preferred if he had let me die. Everything would have been over..."

Harry saw a quick touch of emotion pass through her eyes. She buried her head between her hands. After a few seconds, she seemed to breathe with effort.

"I was an Auror," she said. Her voice quavered. "I should have understood something was wrong. I should have... I should have helped your parents..."

"My parents?" Harry asked. His heard pounded fast. What...?

"She mentioned James and Lily..." Burns said.

"She?" Who was Burns talking about.

"She said Voldemort would take care of them," Burns continued, as if she was in a trance. "And I... I was going to be killed. I wanted to die. I thought it was too late... for me... for them... for you... for everyone..." She paused. "After..."

Harry listened attentively. After what?

"I... I was delirious..." Burns added. "I... 'Potter,' I called. Sirius went to search for you... your parents... but it was too late... If he'd arrived earlier, maybe... Oh, why didn't I understand the truth? If I had known..."

Harry couldn't utter a word. Burns thought she was responsible for his parents' death?

"He broke my heart," Burns said, lost in her thoughts. "He knew it would destroy me..."

Yes, Harry had understood that part about Snape. But what had happened exactly?

Suddenly, Burns laughed devilishly. Harry stepped backwards.

"You should go now," Burns said. "I'm dangerous. Too dangerous to care for a baby. I'm even dangerous to myself. That's the price for my wonderful power," she hissed. "No life, no family, nothing but power. A great knowledge in fighting I've learnt from Lord Grindelwald himself."

Harry's mouth fell agape. "Lord Grindelwald?" he exclaimed. "But he's dead!"

"Yes, he's dead," Burns responded. "But he left a part of himself in the Emerald Star when he died. My heritage. He transmitted the skill of the Dark Arts to me. The art of fighting with cold steel. The art of surviving... I owned those abilities in me, but I couldn't access them. Until Hallowe'en... When my vision broadened. When I realised I had lost everything. The only thing that remained in me was my power. My malediction."

"Your maledic--" Harry said.

"Yes," Burns interrupted. "The Grindelwalds are linked to suffering. They are meant to suffer and make people suffer. That is the price for power."

"Didn't you have a choice?" Harry asked. He thought of his experience with the Sorting Hat. He could have been sorted in Slytherin, but he had chosen Gryffindor... Unlike Voldemort...

Burns snorted. "You are a Parselmouth," she said. "Did you choose it?"

Harry couldn't reply. It was true. He hadn't even known he was a Parselmouth until his second year. And he was linked to Voldemort although he hadn't wanted it. Voldemort had chosen for him.

"Go away now," Burns said. "As I said, I'm dangerous."

Burns stared at Harry with a commanding stare. The boy didn't insist and stepped backwards.

He was about to open the door when he turned around. He wanted to say one last thing before leaving.

"Pettigrew betrayed my parents," Harry said. "And Voldemort killed them. If Sirius had arrived earlier, he'd have been killed too. I... All of this was... meant to happen," Harry continued, thinking of the prophecy. How difficult it was for him to admit he'd been meant to lose his parents... His conversation with Burns had moved him deeply.

"If you're responsible for what happened to them," he said, "I'm responsible too. Voldemort was searching for me."

Harry left the office without waiting for an answer. He realised he hadn't been ready to speak about his parents. Since he had lost Sirius, it was more difficult for the boy to talk about death. His missed his godfather. Harry swallowed his coming tears and headed toward the library.

***

Severus Snape was seated in the staff room. What had that big oaf of Hagrid just said to Flitwick? That his dog had pursued a cat the day the girls had fought over Alphonso? Hmmm... What a coincidence...

Severus had wondered why Alphonso had risked approaching the castle in his human form. But maybe he had taken his cat's form, thinking he'd be able to reach the castle easily. Anyone watching would have thought him a simple cat. But if the dog had attacked him, Alphonso would have been forced to take his human form again. At least to make the dog flee. Then he had met the girls. He'd transformed, but too late. The girls were under his charm and knew he was the cat...

Yes, it was logical. Severus couldn't believe Alphonso's story, knowing he wanted to seduce Burns. The git had probably thought that if he increased his charm, Burns would feel something for him. But he hadn't succeeded. Burns was as cold with him as she was with Severus.

Really? No. Burns had kissed Severus in Grimmauld Place. He hadn't made it up! But what did it mean? If Burns wasn't sensitive to Alphonso's Veela Charm, was it linked to the connection Severus had with her? He was the only one able to touch her when she was suffering. The only one able to cure her. Even Dumbledore couldn't do anything... Burns seemed to be insensitive to everything and everyone... except to Severus... Only when he touched her.

Severus opened the book Infamous Pirates of the Twentieth Century he had found in the Restricted Section. Dumbledore hadn't wanted to give him answers, so Severus had decided it was time to inquire about Grindelwald. It was the only way to fill in the blanks about Burns.

Among the biographic information, a few things caught Severus' attention:

"Lord Grindelwald had two passions in life: the sea and his young wife, Emerald Jamsee. (...) Lord Grindelwald commissioned one of the greatest magical ships ever seen. He called it the 'Emerald Star,' in the honour of his wife. (...)

In 1940, when Grindelwald was on the Pacific Ocean, Emerald Jamsee was kidnapped and killed. People said Lord Grindelwald almost died from sorrow and fell gravely ill. He turned to the Dark Arts and became a very powerful Dark Mage, full of hatred for those who had murdered his wife."

"He searched for them all around the world, crossing the airs and the oceans to take his revenge. (...)"

So... Grindelwald had loved his wife passionately. As Burns had loved Severus. Grindelwald had turned to the Dark Arts when Emerald had been killed. As Burns had turned to the Dark Arts when... Severus' heart tightened. Damn Hallowe'en day!

Grindelwald and Burns also had vengeance in common, although Dumbledore had said that Grindelwald's powers were not based on it. Hmmm...

"(...) The final battle with Dumbledore was so violent that it drained Grindelwald of his vital energy and powers. Known to have a weak heart, Grindelwald succumbed in the final attack. No cure could be found. Before dying, Grindelwald said that 'only his wife could have saved him.'"(...)

So... Only Grindelwald's wife could have saved him, as only Severus could save Burns. Probably because Emerald and Severus were at the origin of Grindelwald's and Burns' problem. Grindelwald had lost his wife forever, and Burns... Burns had lost Severus.

Which meant that... A secretive hope entered Severus' mind. Dumbledore's words echoed in the Potions master's mind:

'The Barrier Keeper was meant to protect the school,' Dumbledore had said. 'Such powers are not based on vengeance.'

Then Severus remembered the conversation between Burns and the Dark Lord:

'Courageous and upright,' the Dark Lord had said, 'that is the reason why your ancestors were chosen. To protect innocent children from evil. But Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff didn't know that Salazar Slytherin had changed the rules. A worm in the apple. What your powers are based on turned out to be your weakness.'

'My powers are based on vengeance,' Burns had replied sharply. 'Vengeance is my strength, not my weakness.'

Little girl," the Dark Lord had replied, laughing, "I am glad I didn't take your powers. They disgust me."

So Burns had a power linked to protection. A power that the Dark Lord had felt disgusted. Nothing to do with vengeance... but...

'Salazar Slytherin was a clever wizard,' Dumbledore had said. 'He gave the other founders of Hogwarts what they wanted. The Barrier Keeper acquired a great power. Great, but frail. Vengeance is the result, not the cause.'

Then Severus understood.

Burns' powers were not based on vengeance. They were based on love.

A great power, but frail. Her weakness.

It was probably the reason why the Dark Lord had wanted Severus to make her drink a Love Philtre. Had the Dark Lord really wanted to take Katarina's powers? Or had he just wanted to break her from inside? To be sure that she would be destroyed? Dumbledore had said that the Dark Lord didn't know everything about Burns' powers. Maybe the Dark Lord had been afraid that Katarina would have become more powerful than he was? Maybe he had wanted to see if he could transform her powers first? In case they would destroy him? For his safety, he had asked Bellatrix Lestrange to do the job...

But... there was something strange. Even if Burns couldn't recreate the Barrier because she had turned to the Dark Arts, she still was more powerful than most of people. So... if her powers were based on love, it meant that...

Severus' eyes widened from the shock. He gasped. His heart pounded very fast. He was the only one able to save her, and only his contact could heal her... The first time he had touched her bare hand, she had jumped and said his name... The last time he had kissed her, she had kissed him hungrily for a few seconds...

Things appeared clearly to him now:

Burns still loved him.

She had buried her feelings deeply within herself, hoping that they would disappear. Maybe that was why she had to get rid of her memories. To forget. But when Severus touched her, he touched that hidden part within her. The love she rejected. It explained why she had suddenly kissed Severus so passionately in Grimmauld Place... why she had broken off the kiss and seemed terrified... why they had stared at each other for several seconds when Burns had fallen over Severus, that day the girls had fought in the classroom... why she danced alone in the corridors...

Severus had hurt Katarina so deeply that her love had transformed into despair. Even Dementors couldn't bear her feelings of pain. Even a stupid bastard with a powerful Veela Charm didn't have any effect on her. Katarina Burns suffered because she still loved Severus and didn't accept it.

'You know her,' Dumbledore had said. 'Find her weakness. If you want to save her...'

And Severus was more determined than ever to save her... It was time for him to repair his mistakes.

***

Harry stood in the crowded Gryffindor common room. He had put on his dress robes for the Spring Ball and was waiting for Ginny. Ron stood proudly beside him in the dress robes Fred and George had bought him. He had straightened up and looked self-confident. Harry was happy. For once, his friend wouldn't be ashamed of his poverty.

"What's Ginny doing?" Ron asked. "I'd like to go to the Great Hall."

"I thought you hated Balls?" Harry said.

"Yeah," Ron replied, "but I'm hungry. I need food."

"You don't have to wait for us," Harry responded. "Where and when are you meeting... er... Marietta?" he asked awkwardly.

Ron grimaced. "Dunno," he said. "I didn't listen."

"But," Harry said, "she won't be... pleased."

"Hmmm," Ron replied. "Don't care. Don't want to be her prince charming. If I must spend an awful evening, she will too."

Harry didn't doubt that Ron wouldn't make any efforts. But how would Marietta react?

Harry saw the door of the girls' dormitories open. His heart pounded fast. Was Ginny ready? No, it was just Hermione -- an elegant Hermione. She was wearing a lovely violet dress, and -- surprisingly -- she was wearing a touch of make-up. Her hair seemed smooth and was raised in a high bun, where a red rose was pinned. She looked pretty.

Ron stared at her for a few seconds, then he looked away.

"Ginny is still preparing herself," she said. "She's a bit late because she helped me with my hair."

"Nice hairstyle," Harry replied.

"Thanks," Hermione responded.

Ron snorted. Hermione screwed up her eyes.

"At least," she continued, "there's one boy with taste in Gryffindor. I mean two, counting Dean." She smiled at Dean, who had stood up from his chair and offered his arm to her. "See you later, Harry."

Hermione stepped forward, hung on to Dean's arm and left the common room.

Ron followed them with his eyes until they disappeared from view. Harry sighed. Ron was so jealous when it was about Hermione...

Several minutes later, Ginny entered the common room too. She was wearing a long blue dress which sparkled. Her hair was braided and raised in a bun.

"You look, er... very nice," Harry said shyly, not knowing which words he could use.

"Thanks," Ginny replied. "The dress is a present from Bill."

"What?" Ron exclaimed. "He bought you a dress? Why didn't I get anything? He's my brother too!"

"He said you could wear the dress if you wanted," Ginny said, giggling.

Ron grimaced.

"Come on," she continued, "Fred and George bought you new dress robes. Now I have some too." She paused. "So," she said, looking at Harry, "I think we can go now."

Harry nodded.

"Yeah," Ron replied. "I'm starving!"

They left the Gryffindor common room and went toward the Great Hall.

"Ron," Ginny said, pointing at a corridor on the right. "The Ravenclaw common room is that way."

"And?" Ron asked.

"What about Marietta?" Ginny asked. "I thought you were going with her."

"She knows where the Great Hall is," Ron replied, visibly bored. "So she'll find it alone."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Fred's right," she said. "You've been raised by baboons before coming to live with us. You don't know anything about manners, and even less about girls."

"Don't want to," Ron replied. "Girls are annoying."

Harry didn't share his point of view. Some of them were not that bad, especially those with red hair...

"And he's my brother..." Ginny said. She rolled her eyes again and sighed at Ron's stubborn attitude.

Soon, they reached the Great Hall. The Hall had been redecorated. Big crowns of spring flowers had been hung everywhere. Golden and silver flower petals drifted from the magic ceiling. It was strange to look above his head and see a snow of petals coming from a cloudless, evening sky. It seemed that the petals came from the stars itself.

Two house tables had been positioned along the sides of the hall and laden with an appetising buffet. Chairs had been placed all over the place. The Head Table had disappeared. It had been replaced by a stage which floated at one meter above the floor.

Harry's mouth fell agape when he saw the group Dumbledore had chosen: there was a big creature which looked like Chewbacca wearing a kilt, two mummies, and three zombies. One of the zombies was singing and the other creatures played instruments.

"Oh!" Ginny exclaimed. "It's the Garbage People!" She clapped energetically.

"The what?" Harry asked. Had he heard right? He stared at Ron with a puzzled look.

"The Garbage People," Ginny replied. "A new group. Pretty famous now. Said they were inspired by a Muggle group."

"Yeah," Harry responded, laughing. "Probably the Village People, although it's not the same music."

"'Don't like this music," Ron commented.

"You don't understand anything about music, Ron!" Ginny said, rolling her eyes.

Ron snorted and turned around, more interested in the drinks than in Ginny's speech.

"Are they all... er... monsters?" Harry asked.

"Some of them are wizards who modify their looks with spells," Ginny continued. "Do you see 'Funky Yeti,' the percussionist? His real name is Ian Kefleg. It's a shame he's cast this spell, because he's very cute in real life!" Ginny giggled.

Harry felt a little jealous, but he didn't show any sign of it.

"And see 'Mum'?" Ginny continued.

"Who?" Harry asked. Had Ginny just mentioned Mrs. Weasley?

"Mum!" Ginny repeated. "It's her pseudonym. The mummy on the left with the guitar! Her real name is Gina Johnson."

"How do you know it's her?" Harry asked. The two mummies looked identical.

"Because of her strips," Ginny responded. "They're white."

"And...?" Harry asked, not understanding Ginny's comment. The second mummy's strips seemed to be white too.

"Look at the other mummy," Ginny explained. "Her strips are yellowish. It's because she's a real mummy. Ian found her in an Incan temple four years ago. She liked his music and wanted to be a part of the group!"

"What about the zombies?" Harry asked.

"The singer is a wizard," Ginny said. "Bob Hart, known as 'Creepy B.' He's so cool! Bill knows him!"

"And the other zombies?" Harry asked, staring at the zombie with the bass and the other at the drums.

"It's the 'Zombie Brothers'!" Ginny responded. "Great musicians in the seventies, but loved smoking plants. Died tragically. They wanted to keep playing music after their death. Bob brought them back. He's their mentor now."

"But they're dead," Harry said.

"Yes," Ginny replied.

"Which means they don't know what they're doing," Harry continued, puzzled. "They just obey er... Bob?"

"Yes," Ginny repeated.

"Weird!" Ron commented, a grimace on his face. Ginny glared at him.

"Look!" she exclaimed suddenly. She pointed at the zombie at the drums, who'd started to play with his bones.

Although the zombie played pretty well, Harry turned around and served himself a drink. His enthusiasm had fallen. He was annoyed by Ginny's attitude. She seemed happier about the group of musicians than about Harry's presence with her. The boy had the awful feeling he didn't exist for her. When he turned around, Ginny had left to approach the floating stage.

Harry sighed.

"This Spring Ball's awful," Ron said. "Oh no!"

"What?" Harry asked.

"Marietta," Ron replied. He stared at his shoes. "Hope she didn't see me..."

But Marietta had seen Harry and Ron and was walking in their direction. She was dressed in a shiny blue dress and her hair was tied with clips. She didn't look happy.

"Ron!" she said angrily. "You were supposed to wait for me in front of the Ravenclaw's door!"

"Must have misunderstood," Ron grumbled.

Marietta threw him a murderous stare.

"I want to dance!" she exclaimed.

"You can dance alone," Ron responded.

"I'm not McGonagall," Marietta snapped.

Ron turned red. Harry understood the message.

"So?" Marietta asked.

"Fine," Ron responded coldly. "But don't complain if I crush your toes."

Harry didn't doubt Ron would do anything for revenge. Marietta would have to watch out for her feet for the rest of the evening.

Someone tapped on Harry's shoulder. Lupin, dressed in nice green dress robes.

"Professor Lupin!" Harry exclaimed. "The Healers allowed you to come to the Ball?"

"Yes," Lupin replied. He smiled softly. "Professor Dumbledore did his best for me to be here tonight. It's been a long time since I've been to a Ball." He paused. "So," he said, "did you manage to clear up your problem of... partner?" Harry felt Lupin was a little embarrassed. Maybe he was offering to help Harry?

"Yes," Harry replied. "Er... she... invited me."

"Good," Lupin responded. He looked at Ron, who was reluctantly moving his body on the dance floor with Marietta.

"Ron doesn't seem to be enjoying himself," Lupin commented, probably to change the subject.

"No," Harry replied. "I don't blame him."

"Most boys don't like to dance," Lupin said.

"What about Dad?" Harry asked.

"Oh," Lupin replied. He scratched his head. "For James and Sirius, it was quite different. Dancing meant being the centre of attention, so... Yes, they liked dancing. In their fifth year, I remember they'd danced a tango together. They were not very talented, but it worked... Everyone gave them a standing ovation after their performance."

"I can imagine," Harry said, laughing.

"Harry," Ginny interrupted, taking his hand and making him jump at the contact. "Can we dance now?"

"Er... yes," he replied, feeling more awkward than ever.

Lupin smiled at him and gave him an encouraging look.

Harry followed his silent advice and went to the dance floor with his partner. He was not a very good dancer, but strangely, Lupin's presence reassured him. He started to move and tried to fight his shyness in front of Ginny. It would be a long evening.

***

Severus Snape was seated on a chair in the Great Hall. He hated these stupid Yule and Spring Balls! It reminded him of bad memories. Although he had made up with Katarina on the evening of the Spring Ball, he had never been her partner. Each time he'd attended a Ball after they had broken up, it had been painful to know that he would never be with her. Never...

But 'never' was before she had come back. Before Severus had realised Burns still loved him. For the last three days, it was difficult for the Potions master to get used to that idea. Each time he saw Burns, she looked at him disdainfully -- when she looked at him. He felt he was just a stupid idealist, a dreamer who hoped although there was no hope. But there was hope. Burns had kissed him willingly. The memory of that kiss gave Severus strength.

Burns entered. Severus' heart pounded faster. She was dressed in a long, elegant black dress. Her hair was raised in a bun and locks of her curled hair framed her face. For once, she was wearing black satin gloves to match the dress. Beautiful.

The Potions master's heart almost stopped. Alphonso hung onto her arm. Severus felt he was reliving his own seventh year's Spring Ball. The git had a large grin on his face, exactly like that bloody Black! Severus' fists clenched.

Burns' face was impassive. She entered the Hall and approached a nearby table. Alphonso pulled out a chair for her. She sat without a word. Alphonso sat too. Severus glared at him. Then he stared at Burns.

Black earrings hung from her ears and a discreet silver necklace with a diamond pendant circled her neck. Her scar had disappeared from her cheek -- thanks to the Magical Make-up. It was Katarina. His Katarina, who still loved him, although she refused to admit it.

Burns noticed Severus' insistent stare and looked at him icily. Then she looked away and served herself Firewhisky.

Alphonso stood up and appeared to ask her for a dance. Burns shook her head. She moved her hand as if she was chasing a fly away, motioning for him to leave her alone. Alphonso looked disappointed, but he obeyed. He went to the dance floor and found himself a partner.

Severus smirked and took advantage of the situation. He stood up and took the seat next to Burns. She ignored him.

"So there is really a woman hidden under that dark green cloak," he said. "I knew she was there, but I started to doubt I would see her again. She's very enticing."

"I'm surprised you call her a woman," Burns replied coldly without looking at him. "Death Eaters don't really consider that half-blood females are women."

Severus was irritated by her comment, but he kept control. Getting angry was not the best way to communicate with Burns.

"No they don't," he said softly. "But I do. Since I fell in love with a wonderful girl. I was awful to her, because I denied my feelings for her. Then I kissed her in a library and we started to have a long relationship. I wanted to marry her. I loved her."

"Is that Yeti wearing a kilt?" Burns asked.

"What?" Severus replied. What was...

"Nothing," Burns said. "Something I read on a student's paper."

"Did you listen to me?" Severus hissed.

"No," Burns replied. She stood up and left the Great Hall, leaving Severus in despair. She hadn't even looked at him.

***

Professor Burns left the Great Hall. Yes, she had listened to Snape's bloody speech. And as long as he had talked, she had felt tears coming to her eyes. What happened to her? She had managed to utter a few sentences to change the subject. She didn't want the git to notice her emotion. Emotion? Were wet eyes really emotion? Allergies probably.

How dare he say he had loved her? Burns remembered that awful day, when she had learnt the truth. When she had realised that Snape had just used her and had planned to kill her...

***

London, Hallowe'en, Katarina's first year as an Auror.

Katarina was walking down a London street under her invisibility cloak, following Severus at a discreet distance. He had left her apartment, saying he had to do something in town as he often did. But this time, Katarina had decided to follow him. Although Sirius Black was a liar, although he had told her rubbish to spoil her life, Katarina wanted to know. She wanted to be sure. She hated the feeling of suspicion that had invaded her heart. She wanted to feel confident again, before she took that step to the altar. It was meant to be a very important moment, something true. And there was no place for suspicion.

Katarina bumped into a thin wizard with a big pumpkin in his hands. She had almost forgotten it was Hallowe'en, she was so focused on her wedding. Damn! Where was Severus? He had disappeared from view. Katarina ran to the corner of the street and looked around. No Severus. She followed the street on her right, but she couldn't find him. Fortunately, she had enchanted one of the buttons on his coat. The perfect way to locate him if he hadn't left town.

She took a map out of her robes. She uttered a spell and pointed her wand at it. The district where Severus was walking appeared in red on the parchment. Katarina realised Severus was in another district, far away from where he had been several minutes ago.

"Either he used a Portkey," Katarina thought, "or he Disapparated."

She frowned. Severus' location changed again... and again... and again... What the hell was he doing by Disapparating all the time? Now, Severus was near Knockturn Alley. Katarina's heart beat hard. Was it possible that...? No, it couldn't be!

He'd sworn there was no other woman! And why would he have hired a prostitute? It was nonsense. He'd said he wanted to wait until their wedding night... No... Severus surely had a good, logical explanation. Nothing to do with... No! How could she think that? Sirius Black was just a liar, and she was just a stupid, paranoid woman! She had to trust Severus!

For a few minutes now, Severus' location hadn't changed. Katarina Disapparated and Apparated to Diagon Alley. Now she had to find her fiancé. Still hidden under her cloak, she began a methodical search. She paced the streets from end to end, without seeing any trace of Severus. He had probably entered one of the buildings.

Katarina swore. Why didn't she have a map with the properties of the Marauder's Map when she needed one? She stared at her map. Severus was still here... somewhere. The young woman waited again, watching people coming home, observing the houses, staring at the windows, expecting to find a clue.

Katarina hadn't checked down Knockturn Alley, hoping that she would find her fiancé in the other streets. But soon, when the streets had emptied, she realised she had to have a look there. Just to be sure. Knockturn Alley was not welcoming, especially at night. It was the perfect place to be murdered. Katarina passed by a tramp, playing with a knife covered with blood. She saw a hag with a crow on her shoulder, feeding the crow live chicks. Katarina was disgusted. She was glad she had taken her invisibility cloak with her.

The street was deserted when she heard the sound of voices. A woman's giggling voice... something strangely unpleasant. That was not the first time she heard this voice, but...

The voices grew louder, heading in her direction. Katarina remained still. She wanted to know to whom they belonged. Three people came into sight. Katarina's eyes widened. In the darkness of the evening, she distinguished three Death Eaters, their faces hidden under masks.

Katarina didn't breathe. The Death Eaters passed close by her. The woman kept laughing, her laughter joined by the second Death Eater. A voice she knew, but couldn't place. The third Death Eater didn't speak.

Katarina completely forgot about Severus and put her map in her robes. She heard scraps of conversation.

"I hope they'll speak about it in press tomorrow," the woman said. "I love when people read what we've done. Their looks when they discover they knew the victims! It's so thrilling!"

The Death Eaters laughed.

Katarina shivered. So they had planned to attack people during the night? Katarina decided to follow them. In other circumstances, she would have been more prudent. She would have warned other Aurors. But the situation was urgent. And the memory of her parents' murder was awakened. She couldn't leave and let them attack more innocent people.

Katarina pursued them silently. She walked along the streets, hoping that the Death Eaters would not decide to Disapparate. Soon, the streets became familiar. Katarina had a lump in her throat.

"I'll get rid of the baby," the woman said. "The Dark Lord will be delighted." She paused. "That thing was born only last year. How can it be a menace?"

"It won't be soon," the second Death Eater replied. This voice was so familiar. Where had she heard it before?

So they were meant to kill a baby born last year? Katarina immediately thought of Harry. The Ministry had informed her that the Potters were in danger. They were hiding somewhere, but Katarina didn't know where. And those streets... they looked familiar. The Death Eaters turned at a corner and went in a residential alley. Katarina had already been there. She knew someone who lived here. But who was...?

Katarina gasped. Augusta Longbottom, Frank's mother, lived here. She was Neville's grandmother, so probably the Longbottoms' Secret Keeper. Alice and Frank were hiding like James and Lily -- although Frank kept going on missions sometimes -- and Neville was born last year. Katarina decided she couldn't let them attack that poor woman. She couldn't let them find the Longbottoms and kill Neville. She had to find a way to attack them and...

One of the Death Eaters stopped walking. The others stopped too and turned to him. Katarina stopped moving too.

"What's the matter?" the woman asked.

The Death Eater laughed hard. Katarina wondered why. Suddenly, he spun around, facing Katarina, and yelled "Expelliarmus!" Katarina hadn't expected that attack. She was hit by the spell and was projected backwards, losing both her invisibility cloak and her wand. She fell hard on the street.

"Here's one for you, Bella," the Death Eater said. "A little distraction!"

Bella? Of course, the woman was Bellatrix Lestrange, suspected by the Ministry of being a Death Eater. Katarina regretted that she had not followed the elementary rules taught by Mad-Eye Moody. Why hadn't she asked for help? Why had she acted like a novice? Now, she had to get back her wand, which had fallen a few meters away. Otherwise she would be killed.

"Crucio!" the man uttered. But Katarina was quicker. She rolled several times on her right and avoided the attack. A jet of light hit the place where she had been just a few seconds ago. She stood up quickly and leapt for her wand. But too late.

"Accio wand!" Bellatrix cried. The moment Katarina was about to reach her wand, it flew into the woman's hand...

***

"Capt'n!" Alphonso's voice called, interrupting Burns in her thoughts.

"What?" Burns replied.

"I saw you leave the Hall," Alphonso said. "Is that git... Snape... bothering you?"

Burns sighed. "It's a complicated, private history," she responded. "Very complicated. None of your business..."

"You look tired, Capt'n," Alphonso replied. "If you need rest, I've learnt that there is a magic room called the Room of Requirement. You'll have what you need in there."

"I've learnt about that room too," Burns said. "I think I'll follow your advice. I need to think... alone..."

"Could you save a dance for me?" Alphonso asked.

"All right," Burns replied. "One dance..."

Alphonso smiled and left. Burns took the staircases. Soon, she reached the seventh floor. Then she walked in the corridors and faced the tapestry of Barnabas the Balmy.

"Teaching trolls to dance the ballet," Burns said. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. She conjured a glass of Firewhisky and drank its contents. Then she walked past the section of blank wall three times. 'I need a place to take rest,' she thought. 'Where I can think quietly.'

A door appeared in the wall. Burns entered. The room was large, but simple. It contained just a bed and a big mirror propped against the wall. Like the one she had seen in Dumbledore's office at the beginning of the year.

She approached the mirror and gasped. She let her empty glass fall onto the floor and break. What was...?

Within the mirror, she saw the image of herself -- pregnant -- and with Snape. They were kissing passionately as if their lives depended on each other.

Burns closed her eyes an instant, hoping that the image would disappear. How cruel! She opened her eyes again and stared at the image, although her vision blurred. She felt tears drop on her cheeks.

***

Severus Snape was hidden behind a suit of armour in the corridors. He had seen Burns leave the Hall, then Alphonso. He had followed the git and heard his conversation with Burns. She had reserved a dance for the git! Damn! Severus tried to calm his anger and thought. So she would go to the Room of Requirement? Fine. He'd learnt about that room too. It was time for him to speak to her.

He took another way and reached the seventh floor as quickly as possible. Then he noticed Burns' presence in the corridors. She walked to the blank wall and stared at the tapestry of Barnabas the Balmy.

"Teaching trolls to dance the ballet," Burns said, sarcasm in her voice. She shook her head, conjured a glass of Firewhisky and drank its contents. Then she walked past the section of blank wall three times and entered the Room of Requirement. She didn't close the door behind her. After a few seconds, Severus heard the sound of broken glass. What was going on? He didn't hesitate. He ran to the opened door.

Burns stood in front of the Mirror of Erised. Her eyes were fixed on the image it reflected. But... was she crying?

Dumbledore had recently explained to Severus what properties the mirror had. With luck, it would show Burns what she refused to admit. Severus entered the room silently, stepped forward and stopped two meters behind Burns. She didn't notice his presence.

"What do you see in that mirror?" he asked, making her jump. Burns spun around and quickly wiped her icy tears. She glared at him.

"I don't see anything in that bloody mirror," she snapped. "And I didn't allow you to follow m--"

"You're lying," Severus interrupted. "The Mirror of Erised shows your deepest desire. And I'm sure that your deepest desire is not to disappear. Not anymore."

"You don't know anything about my deepest desires," Burns retorted.

"Then I'll tell you mine," Severus said. "I see you in the mirror. Us. Together. Clothes not allowed."

"Fascinating," Burns replied icily. "I see Alphonso in the mirror. He shows me his muscles and then we're shagging like rabbits!" She smirked.

Severus scowled. Was it true? This idea revolted him. No. It couldn't be. Burns was just lying to anger him. It worked.

"You see me in the mirror," he responded as quietly as possible, trying to control his jealousy.

"You?" Burns replied. She laughed. "Why would I see an awful greasy git in a mirror that shows desires?"

Severus' patience was over. His jealousy got the upper hand.

"So you see that bastard in the mirror!" he exclaimed. "And you went to the Ball with him!"

"I go with whom I want," Burns replied.

"Couldn't you find better than that... gigolo?" Severus snarled.

Burns laughed again. "You're giving me advice? It has never bothered you to hire prostitutes!"

"What?" Severus shouted. How could she say that? Severus had never hired any of those women. He despised the men who paid for their services.

"Oh, you heard well," Burns replied.

"That's rubbish!" Severus exclaimed.

"It's not worth lying again," Burns retorted. She looked irritated.

"I'm not lying!" Severus barked. "I never paid any prostit--"

"What about Charisma?" Burns interrupted.

"Charis--" Severus was dumbfounded. Charisma? The prostitute he...

"It's not the same!" Severus exclaimed. "I paid her for information! Not for sex! I made a wager with Thomas Brown! The Dark Lord wanted information. I had to get it before him. For the sake of the Order!"

How did she know about that bloody prostitute? Damn! How long had he spoken to that woman? A minute, maybe? And now Burns thought he'd had sex with Charisma!

Burns snorted.

"Oh, don't snort," Severus exclaimed. "I'm telling you the bloody truth!"

"And I bloody don't care," Burns replied. "Alphonso asked me for a dance," she added, looking at the door. "It wouldn't be nice to make him wait," she said ironically.

"That git tried to seduce you!" Severus yelled, enraged. "And he'll try again!"

How dare that prat approach Severus' ex fiancée? Burns belonged to Severus! She was HIS!

"How funny that such a comment comes from your mouth!" Burns hissed.

"I didn't..." Severus said, barely controlling his anger. He hadn't tried to seduce her! Not that way! He'd wanted her to love him because he loved her. Not for what she thought!

"At least, Alphonso fancies me," Burns retorted. "I don't disgust him! As I didn't disgust Sirius Black! I should have run to him from the beginning instead of falling in love with a Slytherin bastard who never wanted me!"

Severus was angry beyond reason.

"I'll show you how wrong you are!" he shouted, pointing at the bed. "And maybe you'll realise you want this as much as I do!"

"Rubbish!" Burns spat. She made a few steps to leave the room. Severus grabbed her arm.

"Oh no, you won't leave again," he said. "We have a problem and we'll sort it out, Katarina!"

"Don't call me that, Snivellus!" she shouted. "And leave me alone!"

"Not until you realise you still love me, stupid girl!" Severus hissed.

She slapped him hard. Severus' cheek was on fire. The Potions master grabbed her wrist before she could slap him again. He held her firmly. Burns tried to shake loose of his grasp, unsuccessfully.

"I hate you," she spat. Her eyes were throwing daggers.

"And I love you," he replied.

He violently pulled on her arm to make Katarina step forward, grasped her waist and kissed her passionately. She moaned and tried to push him away. But soon, she kissed him with the same ardour. Her hands went up his chest, her arms around his neck and her fingers dug in his scalp. Severus' arms wound around her waist. His hands squeezed and stroked her body through her thin dress.

How long did they kiss? Severus didn't know. Time seemed to have stopped.

But suddenly, Burns broke off the kiss and pushed Severus away. She looked terrified.

"Do not ever kiss me!" she spat.

"Stop pushing me away!" Severus replied. "Stop being afraid of me!"

"I'm not afraid of anything," Katarina retorted. She snapped her fingers and Disapparated.

***

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