Hermione Granger and the Order of the Phoenix

Now stay calm, Hermione told herself as she hesitated in front of the library. It's just a study session; it's not a date. There's no reason to get yourself all worked up over nothing.

Despite her reassurances, Hermione's nerves caught up with her and she ducked into the nearby loo to check on her appearance. Ginny had insisted on helping her pick out a suitable outfit that was nice but casual, and had decided on a pair of jeans and an emerald green jumper that was a tad too tight for Hermione's taste, but Ginny claimed that it was perfect. She had also somehow managed to twist Hermione's hair up into a simple, sophisticated twist-thing that Hermione had no idea how to ever duplicate, despite how much she liked the look. She looked nicer than usual, but not too nice as to attract attention to the fact that she was dressed up. Not that she really had anything to worry about; Ginny had carefully managed to make sure that Terry had asked her to study during Gryffindor Quidditch practice so Ron was out of the picture, and Harry was visiting Hagrid.

Oh, Hagrid, Hermione bit her lip as she recalled her failure to convince Hagrid to stick to Grubbly-Plank's lesson plan. She had tried, and tried to get him to see reason, but he just wouldn't listen to her and now look where he was. His inspection had not gone well at all, and if Umbridge took Hagrid away from her, it gave her another powerful reason to despise the DADA professor. She would be amazed if Hagrid escaped being suspended, and Umbridge's bias towards half-breeds just made matters worse. She had to admit that it had been very good to see Hagrid again, and she just didn't want him to be forced to leave so soon.

Hermione straightened her shirt and tightened her grip on her satchel, looking at her reflection steadily. She looked lovely, she knew that she did, and she was going to go spend time with a nice, sweet boy who was obviously interested in her, and at the same time she was wondering if Ron would be in the common room when she returned so he could see her dressed like this. He wouldn't notice, she reminded herself, he doesn't realize anything yet.

But Terry will notice, Hermione added with a slight smile. Terry told Michael who told Ginny who told her that he thought that Hermione had the prettiest smile in the entire school. He's going to notice you; he'll appreciate you.

So what are you waiting for, the voice at the back of her head nagged her, get in there so he can appreciate you.

**

"Wait, wait," Terry laughed as he leaned intently over the table. "You really did slap Draco Malfoy?"

"What, no one believes that I did it?" Hermione asked, arching one eyebrow. "I'm insulted."

"Well, Hermione, you don't exactly seem like the type of girl to slap the biggest git of the school," Terry replied.

"You'll find I'm full of surprises," Hermione retorted, smiling as she reopened her Arithmancy book. "But we're getting off topic."

"Yes, yes, of course," Terry flipped his text to the chapter they had been working on before once again getting distracted and settled down to reread the passage.

Hermione, who had of course all ready read the chapter twice, waited patiently. Things seemed to be going well. It had been obvious that the both of them had been rather nervous when first arriving, but once Hermione had began to lecture Terry on the principles of Arithmancy, she had relaxed; talking about her favorite subject certainly did wonders for her. Terry had visibly relaxed too, and managed to steer her into alternate topics of conversation. She was surprised how easy it was to open up to Terry. Granted, she often ended up just telling stories about her, Ron, and Harry, but it was still a nice change. It felt good to talk to someone one on one like this who wasn't a Gryffindor, and who wasn't a Weasley or Harry; it made for a nice change of pace.

But at the same time, she had to admit; she did miss her best friends.

"Oh, hello, Hermione!" Ginny sang out as she emerged from behind a bookshelf. "I didn't know you would be here!"

Liar, Hermione smirked as she gave Ginny a wave. Terry nodded back and returned to his book. Hermione shook her head at her friend, about to accuse her of spying on her, but that's when Michael also appeared from behind the same bookcase and Hermione noticed their disheveled hair. Ah, she realized with embarrassment, so they really don't study when they come here. She shifted a little with discomfort; it wasn't that she disapproved of snogging; it was just that there was a time and place, and the library certainly wasn't the proper place.

"So how're you doing?" Ginny inquired after Michael approached Terry and took the chair next to him. Ginny perched herself on the arm of Michael's chair and leaned comfortably into him. Michael reciprocated by wrapping his arm possessively around his girlfriend's waist and pulling her closer. "Having fun?"

"Sure," Hermione replied, gesturing to the opened books. "We've gotten loads of work done, right, Terry?" Terry nodded with a glance over at Michael that Hermione couldn't quite decipher.

"Uh huh," Ginny's tone indicated that she didn't believe a word Hermione was saying.

"Gin, I better walk you back," Michael said with a glance at his watch. "It's almost 9:00."

"Oh, right," Ginny chirped. She got to her feet and looked expectantly at Hermione. "Coming?"

"Of course," Hermione also rose and began to gather her things. She knew that Ginny and Michael would rather be alone so they could say good night properly, so she hung back. "You two go ahead, I have to get my things. I'll see you in a bit, Gin."

"Right," Ginny allowed Michael to pull her towards the exit but wiggled her fingers in farewell before disappearing into the hallway.

Hermione jerked her head towards the happy couple as she gathered her books. "They're such a good couple," Hermione said more to herself. God, she wanted that too; as trivial and irrelevant to her career and aspirations as it was to have a boyfriend, she couldn't help wanting it. She wanted it first and foremost with Ron, but since he wasn't ready, she guessed she would have to look for it somewhere else. But, as Hermione slung her satchel over her shoulder, she couldn't help feeling that it was somehow wrong to be walking along with Terry like this. Terry was chatting with her about some pointless thing, and she simply nodded her head, really watching other students pass them. Curfew was in less than five minutes, so several inter-house couples were hurrying back to their respective dormitories. Most of them gave Hermione and Terry a knowing look that disgusted Hermione more than anything. Yes, it now appeared that Hermione Granger had a boyfriend, but it didn't satisfy her as much as she had hoped. It still felt wrong, similar to the feeling she got whenever she spent time with Viktor.

"Hey, I never knew that your common room was around here," Terry's voice broke into her thoughts. "The Room of Requir..."

"Shhh!" Hermione warned, whirling around on Terry. "Don't!"

"Hermione, no one could hear us now," Terry rolled his eyes in annoyance. He reminded her forcibly of Ron at the moment, so she reacted in the same way.

"Terry," (She had to stop herself from calling Terry Ron) "anyone could be listening now." Her eyes meaningfully roved towards the portraits on the wall.

Terry snorted in impatience. "Hermione, everything is perfectly fine," he soothed in what he probably thought was a reassuring tone. However, Hermione only saw the condescending manner he displayed as he took her arm and continued to steer her down the hall. She fought the urge to jerk her arm away; honestly, she preferred it when Ron just snapped back at her.

"Terry, my common room is here," Hermione indicated the Fat Lady. Ginny and Michael had already said goodnight, much to Hermione's disappointment. She had hoped that Ginny would still be in the corridor so they could go into the common room together and avoid the dreaded awkward good-night-and-do-I-kiss-you-now-or-just-hug-you-or-shake-your-hand-or-just-walk-away moment that the end of dates always had. "Well, thanks for walking me, Terry."

"Not at all," Terry shifted his books under his arm and took a step closer. "I still don't think I understand the full theory, do you mind if we meet again, say tomorrow?"

"Well, I have to help decorate the Hall," Hermione began, but she paused slightly. She shouldn't blow off him off just because of one little thing Terry had done; she shouldn't compare him to Ron. Ron was acting like a prat, and she should be dating someone who was not like him. Terry certainly was much more serious and mature than Ron, so she instead of trying to invent excuses to avoid him, she should be clearing time for him. "But I suppose we could meet afterwards."

"Excellent," Terry said excitedly. "Shall we say around 7:00?"

"Uh, better make it, 8:00," Hermione amended. "I don't know how long decorating will take, and I don't want to keep you waiting." Actually, she didn't want to spend two hours with Terry just in case she found out that she really didn't want to pursue a relationship; one hour at a time would be perfectly adequate to ascertain if she wanted to continue dating him.

Terry smirked confidently. "I don't mind waiting for you," he whispered before dropping a quick kiss on her cheek. "See you tomorrow."

"Good night," Hermione called after him before giving the Fat Lady the password and slipping into the common room. She waved to Harry and Ron, who was playing chess, before heading straight to Ginny, who was gesturing eagerly to her.

"Well," Ginny asked in anticipation, "how was it? Did he kiss you? Are you going to see him again?"

"Fine; yes, on the cheek; and yes, tomorrow night," Hermione answered in succession.

Ginny watched her critically and shook her head. "You're still crazy about Ron, aren't you?"

Hermione laughed bitterly. "One date isn't going to change how I feel, Ginny."

"It did with me," Ginny remarked, settling back in her armchair with a defiance that Hermione saw through in an instant.

"Honestly?" Hermione asked shrewdly.

"No," Ginny admitted with a small voice after a long silence.

"Did it ever really change?" Hermione asked softly.

"No," Ginny answered after an even longer pause. She blushed crimson, reminding Hermione of the Ginny Weasley she had first met, who had repeatedly put her elbow in the butter dish whenever Harry showed up.

Hermione patted her friend sympathetically on the arm, and looked over at Ron, almost bursting to go over there, dragging Ron somewhere private, and telling him flat out that she fancied him, and she thought he fancied her, and perhaps they should discuss moving their relationship to another level.

"I know, Ginny," Hermione said under her breath, "and I don't think it's ever going to change."

**

"Hey, Hermione, we still on for tonight?"

Hermione tried to hide her irritation as she stopped. She was already late, and she didn't have time to chat. "Yes, Terry, we're still on."

"Great," Terry, sensing that she was in a hurry, waved and wandered out of the library. Hermione rolled her eyes as she hurried over to the Arithmancy section. She had to get this book now, but she was running out of time. She hastily scanned the titles of the books, and groaned with annoyance. Of course the book she needed was on the very top shelf. She swore under her breath as she stood on her very tiptoes, straining to lift her arms a few more centimeters so she could grab the book hovering just out of reach. She wished she could just do magic to get it down, but there was no magic allowed in the library, and as a prefect, she was a role model and had to abide by the rules. Otherwise, what would the younger students think of her? Still, it was very annoying that she couldn't manage to grab that book--she needed it for her Arithmancy essay, and she had to meet Ron in the Great Hall in a few minutes to help decorate for Christmas. Gritting her teeth in frustration, she tried again, but had no further success.

"Allow me," a smooth voice came from behind her.

A long arm stretched out over her head and easily plucked the fat Arithmancy text off of the shelf and lowered it down. Hermione took it and turned to give her thanks. She was quite surprised to find who it was; she had half-expected it to be Ron since he was the one she usually got to retrieve her books from the upper shelves for her.

"Oh, thank you, Zacharias," Hermione recovered quickly.

"Anytime," the blonde Hufflepuff said easily as he smiled down at her. "Anything else I can help you with? Any more books you need?"

Hermione opened her mouth to say no, but she paused to glance up at the top shelf. Did she need another book?

"Um, no, thank you," Hermione finally answered. "I'm fine now. Thanks for your help again."

"You sure?" Zacharias pressed. Hermione realized for the first time that he had kept his arm up, fingers casually resting on the upper shelf and bulging forearm blocking her path back into the main section of the library. Goodness, no wonder he's a Beater, she thought vaguely while gazing at the muscles.

"Yes," Hermione said firmly, "So, I..."

"Those meetings are going really well," Zacharias continued conversationally. Hermione typically wouldn't allow herself to get drawn into it, especially since she was already late to meet Ron, but Zacharias had been a pain in the neck to get to agree to the aims of D.A. It was about time that he came round, and Hermione wanted to enjoy that.

"I'm glad," Hermione said with a smile. "It's about time we learned some proper Defense around here."

"Yeah," Zacharias said offhandedly. "Thanks for getting me involved."

Her smile grew wider--she loved it when she managed to sway people to the proper point of view. "You're welcome."

"I never wouldn't have stuck with it if it weren't for you," Zacharias told her with a surprising amount of earnestness.

"Really?" Hermione said. "How..."

"Hermione?"

Hermione bent her knees to peer out from under Zacharias' arm, which was quickly lowered. "Oh, hello, Ron," she greeted him. "Sorry to keep you waiting; Zacharias and I were just talking..."

"Yeah, I can see that," Ron cut in. Hermione stared at him with surprise--his ears were flaming red and not because he was embarrassed. He was angry with her for some reason. Was he really that upset because she was a bit late? "But we've got to help decorate the Hall, remember?"

"Yes, of course I do," Hermione told him as she walked by Zacharias. "See you,"

"Bye, Hermione," Zacharias returned with a wide smile. He then brushed out of the library while Hermione walked over to Madame Pince to sign out her book. She was most surprised to turn around to tell Ron she was ready and find him standing directly behind her.

"What's the matter?" she asked him.

"What were you talking to him about?" Ron practically spat out.

"Zacharias?" Hermione shrugged. "He helped me get a book down, and we were discussing..." she trailed off when she realized Madame Pince was behind her, probably listening to every word. "Defense class," she finished meaningfully.

If Ron understood what she was saying or if he even cared, he gave no indication of it. "Yeah," he snorted with disbelief, "if you say so."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Hermione demanded, her voice rising. Madame Pince tactfully cleared her throat, reminding her students that they were in a library. Hermione gave the librarian a quick apologetic smile before quickly brushing past Ron. "Come on, Ron, we don't want to be late."

"It's your fault that we're late," Ron accused as they headed out of the library.

Hermione heaved a sigh. It appeared there was an argument brewing, and she might as well get it over with. "Is there a problem, Ron?"

Ron hesitated briefly before standing his ground and glaring right back. "Yeah," he replied, "I don't like you spending time with that git."

"You don't like me speaking casually to a fellow member of D.A.?" Hermione asked flatly. "Just so you know, and by the way, this is really none of your business, Ron, but I have no interest in spending more time than necessary with Zacharias Smith--he's really not my type, being that you are correct in your assessment of his being a git. Satisfied?" Thinking that the conversation was over, she turned on her heel and started again towards the Great Hall.

But apparently Ron thought otherwise, for he grabbed her by the arm and yanked her into an empty classroom. "What d'you mean, that's none of my business?"

Hermione stared up at him in shock--did he honestly think that she was expected to tell him everything? "Because it's the truth, Ron. You shouldn't be sticking your nose into that facet of my life."

"Fine," Ron said through gritted teeth, and Hermione could tell that he was coming close to exploding. "I won't interfere..."

"Good, now let's get..."

"...but just promise me you'll never talk to him again."

"What?" Hermione shouted in disbelief. "Ron, did you listen to a word I just said? You don't have any say in the matter--I'll associate with whomever I want to, regardless of what you think of it!"

"Fine, but with him? Hermione, he's almost as bad as Malfoy! Do you know what he did to Fred?" Ron yelled.

"Yes, Ginny told me," Hermione shot back. "He stole Fred's girlfriend and that's why he, George, and now you, it seems, act like immature idiots whenever he's around."

"We don't act like idiots!" Ron defended himself hotly.

"Oh, you do too!" Hermione responded, feeling her cheeks starting to turn pink. It bothered her enough that she had realized that the whole Yule Ball incident had really been a big brother act instead of a jealous rage after seeing Ron's reaction to Ginny and Michael--he didn't have to make her feel worse by having her endure another one. "Always trying to stir up a fight and everything, it's no wonder that Zacharias despises you lot..."

"Oh, so now you've been talking about us?" Ron accused. "That's just great, Hermione! Join up with the enemy, why don't you?"

"Or fraternize with the enemy?" Hermione mumbled under her breath, a sense of déjà vu permeating the air at Ron's words.

"What?" Ron asked impatiently.

"Nothing," Hermione snapped. "I haven't been talking to Zacharias about you and the twins; but it's obvious that there is animosity between the lot of you, it doesn't take a genius to figure that out!"

"Hermione, listen to me," Ron said earnestly. "He's no good, he's just using you to get to me--to us..."

Not again!

"Ronald Weasley!" Hermione practically screeched. She felt her eyes start to burn, but she didn't care. "How dare you!"

Ron looked very taken aback at her reaction to his words. "Wh--what?"

"First Viktor, now this!" Hermione screamed at him. "You really think that no boy will ever look at me or even want to spend time with me unless he's a Weasley, or Harry, or he has some dastardly ulterior motive, don't you? You really think that I'm that--vile--and repulsive, don't you?" Ron was gaping at her openly, his very familiar dumbstruck look on his face. "Don't you?"

"N-no," Ron said a little too quickly, "Of course not!"

"Then why are you acting like this!" Hermione yelled, "You didn't even get this bent out of shape when you found out about Ginny and Michael, and that's an actual relationship! There's nothing going on with Zacharias and me in the slightest, and I've already told you a thousand times that Viktor and I are friends! So there should be no problem, we shouldn't be having this argument, we should be in the Great Hall decorating, so come on!" Once again she tried to walk away from Ron, and once again, he jumped in her path to stop her progress. Hermione let out a weary sigh. "Ron, I'm tired of this, can't you just let it go?"

And she was. She was tired of holding back from him and hiding her feelings--she was a rather emotional person and it was exhausting to continue to keep up the charade. Ron wasn't making a move, and wasn't going to anytime soon since he probably didn't even feel the same way. And she had accepted that, and she was trying to move on with her life by going out with Terry. But it was very difficult to do that to when he acted all crazy like this, she couldn't help but wonder if it was jealousy, she got all hopeful again, only to be let down, and she was sick of it. If he would just act normally around her, and be his usual insensitive self, she would be fine. It was the moments that he was either incredibly wonderful or annoyingly irritating that she found herself yearning for more. Even right now--it was a dumb, stupid fight that shouldn't be happening, and she was incredibly annoyed with Ron right now, yet a part of her was wondering what would happen if she either just threw caution into the wind and blurted out what she was feeling right now or just even thrown her arms around him. Ugh, that is the most irrational thought I have ever had, Hermione screamed inside her head. Why, why, did she have to feel this way towards him? It would be so much easier to just forget about it and let it go, like Ginny had been egging her to do.

"I can't let it go," Ron told her angrily, "not until I know you won't be sneaking off with that git." She opened her mouth to argue, but he cut her off impatiently. "He hates our family, Hermione. He went after Fred's girl just for sport, he'd go after George's if George had one, and now he's going after mine..."

Ron realized what he said and instantly broke off mid-sentence. His ears were now a bright crimson from embarrassment instead of anger. Hermione found herself blushing as well and smiling--now she remembered why she didn't let it go. There were these few, wonderful moments that made it all worth it.

But of course, they were only moments.

"...you know, since I don't have a girlfriend." Ron finished awkwardly.

Hermione fully expected another wave of anger to wash over her, but only exhaustion overwhelmed her once again. Ron, you are such an idiot, she thought bitterly, as she let out one, short laugh and started towards the door. They really did need to get to the Great Hall.

But she couldn't resist dropping one more clue. This conversation wasn't getting interrupted, maybe they could finally get things out in the open.

"Ron," she said quietly, keeping her back to him while she gripped the doorframe tightly. Her heart was beating rather fast, and her stomach writhed nervously, but she forced herself to forge ahead. "Is there another reason you don't want me spending time with Zacharias, or Viktor?" She paused slightly. "Could it be because you--is there anything you'd like to tell me?" she amended quickly. She couldn't be too obvious, now could she?

"Uh--no," Ron answered in bewilderment.

"That's what I thought," she whispered, blinking back some tears. She had given him the perfect opportunity, and he blew it. Even someone as thick as Ron should have been able to see what she had trying to get him to say, and if he didn't say it, she just guessed that Ginny had been wrong about her brother's feelings all along. "We better get to the Great Hall; we're all ready dreadfully late."

Ron's face blanched when he realized that Hermione was about to cry, and instinctively his hand reached out for her. But she was already out the door.

**

There appeared to be an unspoken agreement between Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley that whenever they had a row about jealousy and relationships, they would pretend the conversation never happened the next day. Hermione rather hated that pact, but how on earth would she bring it up? Hi, Ron, how are you, let's hop back into that big row we had yesterday when you practically told me that you have no interest in me outside of friendship whatsoever so you can rip out my heart again, shall we?

No, she had to drop it until he brought it up, and that wasn't likely to happen anytime soon. They hadn't spoken to each other the rest of the evening, but by the next morning, Ron acted as though everything was normal. She assumed that he had chalked that argument up to be just another small spat they had that he forgot about the next morning. Prat, she thought for about the millionth time.

The only good that had come from the upsetting conversation they had had yesterday was that it had gotten her out of her "date". She had been so distracted that Terry had suggested about five minutes in that put it off for another night. She agreed, and he hadn't even offered to walk her back to the tower, so thank God she didn't have to worry about him trying to kiss her or anything like that. Even though Terry's affections would probably help her damaged self-esteem, it just wasn't enough. It would never be enough. Only Ron's affections would be enough to satisfy her. Hermione groaned and savagely poked at the remains of her breakfast. Sometimes she really hated the fact that she fancied her thick best friend.

Whoosh

Hermione blinked in surprise as an envelope was dropped onto her plate. She wasn't expecting a letter; she ripped it open and began to read, hoping that it would cheer her up.

Dear Hermione,

Hello, dear, how are you? I hope that everything is going well; we haven't heard from you in a while. I know that you're very busy with your studies and those end-of-term exams you told us about, but I should hope that you could still find time to write to your father and I every now and then.

The reason we're writing is to discuss the Christmas holidays. We received a very nice owl from Viktor Krum today. He told us about the invitation he extended to you about skiing in Bulgaria, and was kind enough to ask us along too.

Hermione, please know that your father and I would really like to spend some time with you over the holidays. Over the past couple of months, we've hardly had the chance to spend time with you at all. We miss you, darling, and would like to spend Christmas with you.

Your father and I have always wanted to go to Bulgaria, and we do have some family there we can stay with that is near the Krums. We think this would be a wonderful opportunity to travel, and most importantly, reconnect as a family. It would also be a nice chance for you to see your friend again, whom I sure you miss very much.

Please reply as soon as you can manage, and hopefully Dad and I will be picking you at King's Cross in a few weeks!

Love,

Mum

It was amazing how her mother could make her feel so guilty with such a short letter. But then again, guilt trips were a specialty in the Granger household. Hermione fingered the letter as she took a sip of her pumpkin juice. She had planned on staying at Hogwarts for the holidays as she had done for the past three years in order to keep Harry company and study for O.W.L.s. But now it looked like she was stuck. She had never even considered going to Bulgaria to see Viktor for the Christmas holidays; it was much too far away and she had to admit she was more than a little nervous about seeing Viktor again. But now it appeared to be inevitable that she had to face Viktor Krum. Her last words to him hadn't been entirely friendly; when he had pulled her aside to say good-bye, he had asked her once again to come to Bulgaria, and she had once again said no, and added that she was sorry but she didn't think of him as anything more than a friend and she didn't want to lead him on. He was rather disappointed, but he had agreed to just be friends. And he certainly had been a wonderful friend to her, writing to her at least once a month. Viktor had become an outlet for her; usually his letters were full of rants about whatever was currently plaguing her at the time, and he responded with cheerful descriptions about what he was up to and advice to her problems. His advice was typically useless, true, but it was the thought that counted. So, technically, she should be ecstatic to see Viktor again.

But she wasn't. She supposed that it was because she almost felt safer away from Viktor; if he was thousands of miles away, he couldn't try to make a move on her again. She had been content to have Viktor just be a pen pal, but now she had to see him.

Well, there's some good that could come of this, Hermione reasoned with herself. Maybe she needed to get away from the castle and get some distance between her and him. Seeing him around constantly certainly didn't help her get over him, and she couldn't even imagine how awful it was going to be when he finally got a girlfriend of his own. She had to get over him, for own sanity's sake as well as to save their friendship. God, she couldn't even imagine the thought of not having Ron as her friend. Hermione actually physically shuddered at the thought of life the way it was in third-year when Ron and Harry weren't speaking to her. She couldn't go back to that horrible place ever again. So she had to get over Ron, and maybe the Christmas holidays would be the perfect time to achieve that goal.

And she would also get to see her parents again. She had to admit that she did miss them, her dad especially. Her mum and her...well, her mum and her didn't get along exactly. She was almost exactly like her mum, so they often clashed over stupid, trivial things. Kind of like her relationship with some other person that she knew.

Speaking of that other person...

"Hey," Ron greeted as he dropped down on the bench alongside of her and loaded his plate full of eggs. His eyes fell on the letter Hermione was still holding, and he waved his fork towards it. "Whafthaft?" he inquired with a mouthful of food.

Hermione carefully flicked the specks of eggs Ron had splattered all over the parchment and moved it out of his reach. "A letter from my parents," she responded.

"Oho, thafremineme," Ron swallowed as Hermione looked speculatively at him. She had no idea what he had just said. "I got a letter from Mum last night, and she invited you and Harry to the Burrow for Christmas."

Oh, don't say that¸ Hermione thought ruefully. "Oh, Ron, I'd love to spend Christmas with you," she said earnestly. "But I can't. My parents want me to come home for Christmas this year."

"Oh," Ron looked disappointed as he shoved another heaping mouthful of food into his mouth. "Are you sure you have to?" he asked after he swallowed. "I mean, I just don't think it's a good idea for you not to be around, I mean," He avoided her eyes as he tried to put together a coherent sentence. "Harry needs you around." He finally blurted out.

Yes, Ron, I know that Harry needs all the friends he can get right now, but what about you? Do you want me around? But Hermione just shrugged. "I know, I feel badly too, but my parents asked me to spend the holidays with them since I spent most of the summer with you."

"Oh, yeah," Ron took his last mouthful and wiped his mouth. "Are you sure you can't come?"

"Yes, Ron!" Hermione snapped a little harsher than she intended. She really did want to go to the Burrow, and was rather disappointed that she couldn't, and Ron pressing the issue was only making her feel worse. "I'm going home this Christmas; my parents had already made the travel plans, so I can't back out now!"

"Travel plans?" Ron quickly asked, his voice immediately becoming sharp and he eyed her with suspicion.

Hermione bit the inside of her lip to stop her face from betraying her annoyance with herself. Why did you have to let that slip? She remembered clearly Ron's reaction when he finally figured out that she was still in contact with Viktor; he was still acting like an idiot about the whole Viktor situation. He would only get angry if he knew she was going to Bulgaria to see him, and right now, if she couldn't have Ron Weasley as her boyfriend, she was going to keep him as her best friend.

"Yes," she said coolly, hoping that her cheeks weren't flushed. "My parents are taking me skiing." That was true; she was going skiing. She just didn't divulge the full details of who else would be skiing with her.

"Skiing?" Ron's irritation quickly shifted to puzzlement. "What's that?"

"It's a Muggle sport," Hermione explained, "Skis are these wooden strips that you strap on your feet, and you go up to the top of a mountain with the skis on, and you slide down the mountain top."

Ron's face was red as he tried to contain his laughter. "Wait, wait, let me get this straight," He sat up straighter and counted off each element on a long finger. "You put wood on your feet, you go to a mountain, you slide down, and this is fun?"

"Well, you think that flying around on a stick and throwing around a ball is fun," Hermione retorted.

Ron was laughing too hard to care. Hermione couldn't help smiling at his obvious mirth; she could never stay angry and upset very long if Ron Weasley was around and in a good mood. It didn't seem very relevant to tell him that she actually had skied before and hated it. It was better to just watch him laugh.

**

Well, sometimes it wasn't the best thing to watch Ron laugh. It really depended on what he was laughing at. Like right now she was getting dangerously close to kicking his head in as he rolled on the hearthrug.

Idiot, she thought viciously. Honestly, how immature could he get? Harry had just come in looking all confused and dazed, and she knew instantly what had occurred. She had heard Cho Chang talking in the loo about wanting to wish Harry a proper Merry Christmas after D.A., and Hermione knew what that meant the minute she had walked in the Room of Requirement and saw the mistletoe hanging there. She had actually considered lingering under the mistletoe when she and Ron had left, but Terry Boot and Zacharias Smith had been the only ones who noticed and appeared to what to respond, so she had quickly ducked away without Ron, who had stayed behind to chat with Luna, Ginny, and Michael. As glad as she was that Ron was making a disgruntled attempted to get to know Michael for his sister's sake, she was not pleased that he had to stay behind to talk to Luna. Ginny had insisted there was nothing to be jealous of, but she couldn't help herself. It just seemed so obvious to her that Luna was interested in Ron, and even though Ron wasn't interested in her, she couldn't help that she didn't like anyone who was interested in who she was interested in.

Her thoughts had become rambling and incoherent, so Hermione knew that she had to vent her frustration some way. Ginny was off with Michael, Harry was with Cho, and she obviously couldn't discuss this with Ron, so there was only one other person: Viktor Krum. She had decided not to use names, but she would tell Viktor everything: that she had fallen for a friend and she thought she was going to go insane. Besides, it would give her something to talk to Viktor about when she saw him in a couple of days.

It had thrown her a bit that Ron had been completing his homework while she poured her heart out to Viktor about Ron, but it had to be done, and she couldn't do it with Lavender snoring away in her dormitory. But the thoughts of her letter had flown out of her head when Harry had arrived with that expression on his face and told them about kissing Cho. She couldn't be happier for Harry; he had fancied Cho for ages, and now he finally had a sweet, kind girl who would most likely be a very good influence on him. Hermione couldn't help thinking that Ginny would probably be the best girl for Harry out of sheer loyalty, but Cho Chang was a close second. Harry had been going through so much this year; he deserved to have some fun.

He did appear to be enjoying Ron's amusement of his situation, but Hermione was only disgusted. Idiot, she thought again as she looked back down at her letter, I should mention to Viktor how big of an idiot the boy I fancy is.

"Well?" Ron said finally, looking up at Harry. "How was it?"

Hermione didn't think it was polite to gawk at Harry, waiting for an answer, so she just kept her head down, scratching away at the parchment, but listening intently.

"Wet," he said truthfully.

Ron made an odd sound as Hermione couldn't help looking up from the table. Wet? There was the obvious connotation of what Harry had meant by that statement, but she never thought that Harry would be so graphic and lewd, and honestly, she didn't think that Harry had it in him to go that far during his first kiss. Knowing Harry, he probably had no idea how to kiss a girl properly.

"Because she was crying," Harry continued heavily.

Oh, God, not again, Hermione couldn't help thinking with annoyance. It seemed that every time Cho was in the loo, she cried. She had even cried when telling her friend about wanting to kiss Harry for Christmas; Cho claimed it reminded her of Cedric. Hermione knew that it must be awful to lose somebody you loved, but she thought that Cho was carrying it a little overboard. She always seemed to cry in a big crowd, so it seemed to Hermione that she just wanted attention. But then again, Hermione never liked to cry in front of people, but maybe Cho felt differently.

"Oh," said Ron, his smile fading slightly. "Are you that bad at kissing?"

Ron, how thick can you get?

"Dunno," said Harry, "Maybe I am."

"Of course you're not," said Hermione absently as she continued to write Viktor's letter.

"How do you know?" said Ron in a sharp voice.

Hermione briefly wondered why Ron got so defensive so suddenly before explaining. "Because Cho spends half her time crying these days. She does it at mealtimes, in the loos, all over the place."

"You'd think a bit of kissing would cheer her up," said Ron, grinning.

Don't slap him, it's not polite to slap your best friend, Hermione told herself tersely while she dipped the point of her quill into her ink pot. "Ron, you are the most insensitive wart I have ever had the misfortune to meet."

Hermione instantly felt guilty for speaking so harshly to Ron, but her anger faded as she realized that both Ron and Harry just didn't understand girls at all. She thought that after being friends with her for so long that they would have some concept of how a girl's mind works, but they really didn't have a clue. She rather felt sorry for those two, so she managed to calmly explain why Cho was crying so much. Granted, she had snapped at Ron again and told him that he had the emotional range of a teaspoon, but he deserved it and he really did. Honestly, she never knew anyone could be so thick! It irritated her so much, it drove her mad...it was part of the reason why she was crazy about him.

The words she was thinking poured out onto the parchment before she could even realized it, and she wrote on unconsciously, but still managed to discuss Harry's love life at the same time. The only thing that really distracted her was the paper suddenly being tugged on.

"Who're you writing the novel to anyway?"

Hermione hastily hitched it up out of sight. "Viktor."

"Krum?"

Well, well, well; it looked like Ron's miniscule emotional teaspoon included jealousy.

"How many other Viktors do we know?"

Hermione still wrote on for another twenty minutes, flushing out all concerns and frustrations she had about Ron with the utmost calm. She hurried out to her dormitory for bed, but instead of finding an owl, she carefully hid the letter in the bottom of her trunk. For some reason, it now didn't seem important to send it. She didn't need Viktor's advice on the matter; she just needed to get it all out of her system. And now that it was...Hermione bit her lip as she climbed into bed and blew out her bedside candle. Now that it was, she was whole-heartedly wishing that she could get another chance to get Ron under the mistletoe.