Lie is a Life

The candles flickered eerily in the darkened dungeon. It was the Room of Requirement, only this time it wasn't being used for Defense Against the Dark Arts. They were here only because of their desperate need to be somewhere protected. Dumbledore had granted them special permission to use it. Hogwarts was the newest meeting place for the Order since Sirius' death. Things had been going fairly well since the Death Eaters had been imprisoned again. This time it was in the Ministry of Magic itself. The shop in Diagon Alley was profiting from the steady line of jokes it supplied the magical world with. Orders poured in from everywhere...at least until this past month or so. Now George knew why.

He was sitting on a leather couch and looking disturbed. Fred flinched when he saw the bitterness in his twin's eyes. His story was a grim and painful one to tell but the effect it had on his brother was nothing like what he had expected. They had been in the chamber so long that the tapers were almost out (of course they would re-build themselves when they reached the end of the wick but that was besides the point). Fred had hoped the George, in some way, would pull an end to their problems out of the air and assure Fred that it was all a dream or that everything would be all right. Since they could babble out childish jokes, and even before, the twins had always held this deep undercurrent of understanding and unquestioned loyalty to one another. This was the first time the bond had snapped, and it was Fred's fault. The tense cloud grew larger and larger and the longer the silence went on the harder it seemed to break it. George's eyes were so dark they were in danger of receding into the etched features of his face.

"You realize...." George began in a voice quite unlike his own.

"George, please. Don't...don't decide anything just yet. You're me, we're one, a twin...two designed for jokes...remember?" Fred tried to weakly inject some sort of humor into the situation. His attempt was hardly a shadow of a laugh and it resembled Harry's first Patronus more than it did a joke.

"Don't even fucking think about bringing up us as brothers. This is betrayal in a sense beyond the connection we share. You've condemned yourself, the shop, your future, half of what the Order has been working on and probably doomed me as well." In response to this comment Fred seemed to fully come to terms with his screw up.

"Look give me one night to relax or something, just the one. I... I'll go to dad, I'll take full responsibility."

"Yeah well you should, unless you want to lie and say I had something to do with it."

"I wouldn't! I never meant for such harm to come to you or me from this."

"Next time you try to enlist the darkest wizard ever for help, try and keep your head clear so you can see the fucking road in front of you."

It wasn't his intention...that was true enough but it was hard to take some things seriously in the world the Weasley twins had created for themselves. So he talked to the Malfoys; struck a temporary bargain with them. It wasn't supposed to turn out this way. The good side always wins right? All he wanted was a good, firm start for the shop. Their expenses were running higher than they imagined. Half of the money Harry gave them was spent on creating new items and the other half was set aside for monthly rent. What they had needed most was the essentials, building supplies, money to buy main line joke items like Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. The Malfoy's could have the money back, the stolen goods...it was theirs. But when Fred tried to give it back Draco, to end the deal Malfoy had laughed in his face.

"You expect this to be another one of your jokes, Weasley? Is that it...a laugh, a smile, and we just exchange the goods. Well don't be surprised if you find that it doesn't work quite like that, not for you. Not for a Weasley." And he spat at Fred's feet. He was way over his head and there was no turning back. It wasn't just a nightmare, it was worse: it was reality. Now he had no one to turn to. It was stupid, he knew. All he needed was money, a lot of it. Money, some system of transportation, and some good connections. Who comes to mind first when one thinks of money and certain illegal activities... the Malfoys of course, Draco Malfoy to be exact.

Draco. Fred thought. The bastard had only been a stupid snob at Hogwarts. No one to really consider threatening in the real world. Fred had assumed that eventually the jackass would outgrow his arrogant ways and perhaps lead a better life than his father. But the bitter secrets that had diminished his father's heart to nothing seemed to do the same for Draco. Well, it doesn't matter now. I'm through with life; I've ruined everything anyway. And I'm still feeling sorry for myself.

"There isn't anything left to do is there George? I'll just go off to the Ministry tonight, all right? I won't even wait for daylight to strike the earth. I didn't know where else to go, I knew I would just make things worse by not telling you before I did anything."

"You never knew did you?" Started off George. " I guess I wasn't such a foolish bastard to think that I might have gotten the better half of brains between us. The ministry is a playground. They'll send you where...Azkaban? You think they wouldn't know that You-Know-Who wouldn't just go there to get you. You haven't damaged him or anything. He probably just left things up to Malfoy. Why would you trust the bastard. You've only denied Voldemort power, the only thing he wants. You still don't get it, do you? You're dead. Go to the Ministry and everyone will know. Voldemort will know that we know. And so you condemn us all. And if you tell dad, he'll try and hide you. Hell, maybe he'll even ask the Ministry for help. Then we're all dead. But the damage is done. There is only one path left uncovered. You don't know. You never knew, never found out."

Fred shook after hearing such a speech. George, his brother, his other half was practically against him. For once there was nothing they shared. His life was over now...all because of a stupid bargain. Why? Why was life so fucking unfair. Why was he foolish enough to think he was invincible, out of the loop, that he followed another set of rules? WHY? While wallowing in self-pity, it dimly entered his mind that George had mentioned the possibility of a way out. A way to wake up from this sick reality. He hesitated inquire further as if the moment he asked the saving statement would vanish from his memory and leave nothing but the bleak future he had to face in front of him.

"I dunno. Don't save me George, I deserve to die. But save yourself; save the family...they were far smarter than I. I couldn't even stand up to Voldemort when it came to being selfish. Don't even fucking listen to me now. Forget all my existence." He contradicted himself...his whole life was a selfish pothole anyway.

"Yes, well I never actually fell in love with anyone, just the idea of secrecy and passion and the drama of it all. It seemed like ages ago. I tripped over him walking in a passage near the dungeons. Malfoy. It was a secret one, one of the passageways that only you and I knew about, or so I thought. He fell right on top of me in a rather compromising position. It was the look in his eyes that made me do it. So I kissed the bloody bastard. It was just a joke, I thought it would infuriate him. We never spoke a word when we were together but it was quite often. I wasyoung, and he was even younger than I. Some days I would get frustrated waiting for him for hours, but he seemed to know when to see me.

Like you said, Fred, you and I were practically one, a single person. It wasn't fair, was I only to be remembered as a Weasley twin? Even if I could break that reputation in one person's mind it would set me free. And so it did. Draco and I...our relationship was lust. A side that none else had seen from me. It was ridiculous, which made it all the better for me. The thrill of his lips, a tender brush past him in the hallway would cause a tingle up my spine. It could have been anyone really, any willing person that happened to bump into me. I needed a secret from you. It became so much a part of me that you never even detected a lie. It was all timing. But then it wasn't. It was he. Draco. He was mine, only for me. I wasn't sane, I...I don't know what I was. Just breaking rules and landing myself in detention was stupid. This was better, real. An affair with the enemy, a dreaded relationship. It would destroy us if we were discovered. Those thoughts just made me relish our time together even more. It was pure beauty. A pathetic little bastard, he was. Although I was too. We were meant for each other. It was stupid and beautiful. Lame and sexy and dramatic and illegal and against every rule spoken and unspoken. Outlaws we were. It was great. No one ever guessed. I never feared that they would. If someone were to find out, who would believe such a story? Every Weasley was known to despise the Malfoys. I myself did. I hated everything about Draco. Every motion of his hand to the sweat on his brow. I hated him. I hated my love for him. Our passion. Our passion was unmatched and young. It was over when you and I left Hogwarts. I never said good-bye. I've never even heard a tender tone in Draco's voice. I never did once." George concluded his reminiscing.

Fred sat dumbfounded at George's speech. It seemed so much apart of his twin for so long that it was impossible to separate the love-Draco side of him from his pre-Hogwarts self. It seemed again, only apart of the bizarre nightmare Fred was having. Laughable really, all these incredible fucked up lies people live through. Desperation, the natural need for companionship. Not once did he question the truth in George's words. It wouldn't have fit the nightmare for it to have all been a lie. Their natural bond was a lie. What is a lie? It is a life.

"So there's your way out. I can't just let a person go die. Condemn them to evil, not my brother. I don't care who you are, or how stupid you've become. We are still one person, brothers. We share blood, that's a bond you can never be rid of. You think I can let myself live if I don't try to save you? Well I can't. I have some pride. You know what I have to do..." Fred knew exactly what George was suggesting. Tears filled his eyes from the new, stronger bond they now shared. Now there really was nothing between them. Nothing but lies, which mixed with the truth so often, it became partly truthful itself.

"You would do that for me? Draco...what if he laughs in your face. Passion, can it overcome evil? What if he laughs, slams the door and leaves you there. We'll both be gone."

"Look, I bet your not the top priority on Voldemort's list. It's the only shot you have anyway and you've been selfish enough so far, at least let me feel like a hero for a little while. We share pride, Fred."

The brothers did not sleep through the rest of the night but rather silently contemplated the many routes the coming hours of the morning could bring. When dawn broke through the sky a few hours later in the enchanted window of the room, George spoke not a word to Fred but caught his eye nodded and left to exit the grounds of Hogwarts.