The Awakened Sleeper

"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed."

--Carl Jung

Chapter 13

Transgressions and Transformations

Now that the excitement of the first Hogsmeade weekend of the term had come and gone, the anticipation of the first Quidditch game had taken its place. The inevitable surge of animosity between Gryffindor and Slytherin was in full effect. Unfortunately, so was the Hogwarts rumor mill. The news of Cressida's attack had traveled quickly, sending the rivalry between the two Houses to an unprecedented high. The tension in the Great Hall that Monday morning had created an eerie silence as members from both Houses shot icy glares at each other in between bites of eggs and toast. Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws followed suit, depending on whose story they believed--Evan's or Cressida's. Emotions were running high, and Lily predicted that Madam Pomfrey would have several victims occupying her beds by the end of the day.

As she walked into the Potions classroom early, she was both disappointed and relieved to see that Severus had not yet arrived. He had occupied a place in the back of Lily's mind all weekend. There were unresolved issues between the two of them, and as much as she wanted to work them out, she was also afraid that talking about them might bring their friendship to an end before it had a chance to begin. Before she left him on Saturday, it seemed as though Severus had forgotten about her perusal of his journal. But he'd had the remainder of the weekend to stew over her misdeed, and she was worried that he would shut her out the way he used to.

To ease her anxieties, Lily sat in her seat and began unpacking her supplies, rehearsing what she was planning to say to Severus in her head. When she heard the sound of the chair next to her being scraped across the stone floor, Lily launched into her carefully crafted speech.

"I feel really terrible about Saturday," she said, her downcast eyes evidence of her lingering shame. Admittedly, it wasn't much of a speech, but it summed up her feelings quite nicely.

"You shouldn't. I mean, it wasn't your fault, was it?"

These were not the words Lily expected to hear... or the voice she expected to hear, for that matter. She looked up in time to see James lowering himself into her partner's seat.

How does he know about what I did? she thought frantically. I haven't told a soul, and Severus would take a pleasant stroll through Hell wearing robes soaked in petrol before confiding in James. Lily thought it best to find out how much James knew without offering any information. Her current approach of staring at him as though he had just sprouted a set of antlers on his head wasn't getting her anywhere.

"It... wasn't?" she replied apprehensively.

"Of course not, Lily," said James, his voice surprisingly soothing. "You can't be with her twenty-four hours a day, can you? Nobody is blaming you for what happened to Cressida."

Relief washed over Lily as she realized that James didn't have a clue about her nosy little transgression. However, relief was immediately replaced with guilt.

Of course he's talking about Cressida, stupid. She's all anybody is talking about. If you were the friend to her that James seems to think you are, Cressida would be the only person on your mind. For what seemed like the millionth time since Saturday, Lily felt like the worst friend in the world. Ashamed, she said nothing in response, choosing to study the creases in the palms of her hands instead.

"Wait a minute," said James, his voice rising slightly, "has anybody been blaming you for what happened? It wasn't Sirius, was it? I know the two of you spent Saturday night with Cressida in the hospital wing. He didn't say anything stupid, did he?"

"Sirius was fine, James," Lily replied. "In fact, he said pretty much the same exact thing you just said."

"Oh. Good," he said, his cheeks reddening slightly. "I didn't notice Rosier at breakfast this morning, so I suppose he was expelled."

"Oh, haven't you heard?" Lily inquired disdainfully. "He wasn't expelled at all!"

"What?" James nearly shouted. "How could McGonagall let something like this happen? To hear Sirius tell it, she was ready to pick him up and throw him out on his bum herself."

"And he was right. When Professor McGonagall came to tell us about his punishment, she was livid. She told us that she had insisted that Evan be expelled immediately. For some reason, Professor Dumbledore said Evan had to stay here, but he wouldn't tell her why."

James shook his head, refusing to believe what he had just heard. "I always thought the headmaster was better than that. Sirius and I play a few pranks every now and then, and we get read the riot act. Rosier nearly rapes a girl, and he doesn't even get a slap on the wrist?"

"Not quite. It turns out that Evan has been banned from Hogsmeade visits, Quidditch games, and any other extracurricular activities. He also has to be escorted to and from classes and the library by a staff member, and he has to remain in Slytherin House when he's not in class. He even has to take all of his meals in their common room."

"For how long?"

Lily smiled. "For the rest of this term, all of next term, and his entire seventh year."

"Blimey!" James exclaimed. "They really pulled out all the stops, didn't they? But what happens when he gives one of the teachers the slip?"

"The headmaster has a way of knowing where Evan is at all times. Professor McGonagall wouldn't tell us how, though." Lily folded her arms across her chest fretfully as she said, "I wonder why Professor Dumbledore wanted to keep him here. It just doesn't make any sense."

"Maybe he wanted Rosier where he knew he could keep an eye on him."

"No... I think there's more to it than that. I mean, he can't keep Evan here forever, can he? He has to let him go home at the end of the term, right? No, I suspect that Professor Dumbledore has some other reason," she said, sighing in resignation. "I suppose we'll never know what it is, will we?"

Lily looked up as several Slytherins passed their table, unabashedly staring at both of them with loathing. She defiantly returned their glares until they looked away in disgust. When she turned back to James, she was surprised to see him grinning from ear to ear.

Confused, Lily furrowed her brow and asked, "What?"

"I never thought I'd see Lily Evans, Gryffindor prefect, win a glaring contest against a group of Slytherins. You're made of tougher stuff than most people realize, you know."

"Honestly," Lily responded, rolling her eyes, "how do you think I got into Gryffindor in the first place? My good looks and winning personality?"

Lily wanted to giggle at the absurdity of what she'd just said. However, when she noticed James studying her face, the laugh got caught in her throat. She felt as though James was taking in every nuance, every subtlety in her face, committing them to memory as if this was the only opportunity he would have to do so. As he continued to look at her, Lily felt her cheeks begin to warm. Being stared at in such a way was unsettling, but not as much as what came out of his mouth next.

"Well... I'm sure if those had been the requirements, Godric Gryffindor would have returned to accept you into his House himself."

Is he... flirting with me? Lily's stomach flipped at the thought. It now felt like an inferno was blazing under her skin. Stop blushing and say something, you idiot!

"That was very bold of you, James," she managed to say as she nervously tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "There's no question that you're in the right house, is there?"

"No," he said, "I'm a Gryffindor to the core. I bravely forged ahead... even though I was convinced you were going to slap me into the middle of next week." His grin took on a devilish quality as he added, "I was willing to take the risk."

Lily's stomach fluttered again, and she discreetly placed her hand over it. Your stomach should not be turning flips over James Potter! she admonished herself as she willed her body to stop reacting that way. Not wanting to give James the wrong impression, Lily felt it was time to steer the conversation in a different direction. She knew one sure-fire way to douse any potentially amorous feelings he might be harboring at the moment.

"I imagine that Severus will be here any minute, so was there something else you wanted to talk to me about?" Like clockwork, the jovial expression on James's face melted away at the mention of Severus Snape. Even though she felt it was for the best, Lily felt a slight twinge of guilt as she watched his expression harden.

"Yeah," he responded in a brusque, business-like tone. "I know we still have a month or so before we actually begin our tutoring sessions, but I was wondering if there were any books I should be studying in the meantime."

"Oh. Well, there are a few books that have helped me a lot over the years. I'll write them down for you and give you the list after class."

"Why wait when I can give you a couple of suitable titles right now?" inquired a voice from above with an all too familiar sneer.

"Severus..." Lily began, her tone imploring him not to say another word. Naturally, he ignored her completely.

"I've heard that Potions Basics for the Imbecilic has full color, step-by-step illustrations." Lily looked up to see Severus regarding James with a smug, self-satisfied expression as he said, "Of course, I doubt the library has a copy of My First Potions Book. You may have to order it from Flourish and Blotts."

James slowly tilted his head up, eyeballing Severus. "Thanks for the advice, Snivellus. I'll be sure and order a copy of What Every Young Wizard Should Know About Hygiene for you while I'm at it."

Lily cringed slightly and she saw Severus's nostrils flare a little. She felt like she should say something to stop them, but her experience on Saturday had taught her that she'd have to cause a major scene to do so. As tired as she was, she just couldn't be bothered today.

Recovering quickly, Severus dropped his bag on the floor, placed both of his hands on the table and leaned toward James. "As thrilling as it must be for Lily to have you drooling all over her, I'm sure she's ready for some intelligent conversation now--something that she won't be getting as long as you're sitting in my seat."

James rose out of the chair to meet Severus's gaze. The two of them stood there, staring each other down for what seemed like an hour to Lily, but actually couldn't have been more than thirty seconds or so. Then the oddest thing happened--James smiled.

"Sure thing, Snape," he said cheerfully, pushing the chair back and moving aside. Severus picked up his bag and walked past James, purposely bumping his shoulder as he made his way to his seat.

James looked down at his shoulder for a moment, as if contemplating whether or not he should retaliate. Instead, he turned to Lily and said, "I'll talk to you about those book titles later." To her relief, he turned and walked toward his seat in the back of the room.

"Oh, yeah," he called out loudly over his shoulder, "you might want to budge up a bit, Evans. You don't want great big grease stains all over your notes." As most of the Gryffindors in the room laughed uproariously, Lily could feel her face reddening again, due to equal parts anger and embarrassment.

I actually thought James Potter had changed, she thought as she silently seethed. I can't believe I agreed to work with such an immature toerag! She looked to her right to see that her partner's breathing had quickened. Without hesitation, she covered his hand with her own.

"Don't give in to the anger, Severus. That's exactly what he wants." Unconsciously, Lily began rubbing small circles on the back of his hand with her thumb. "Just calm down and talk to me. That'll piss him off more than anything else will."

As Severus looked down at their hands, Lily realized what she was doing and quickly pulled her hand back. She folded her arms across her chest and leaned against the back of her chair. "Of course, you did have it coming."

"What?"

"Well, you did start it, Severus."

"It was a preemptive strike. I knew he'd have something to say so--"

"--it was a case of 'I'll get him before he gets me.' That was very mature of you, Severus."

"Wasn't it, though?"

Lily turned slightly at the sound of amusement in Severus's voice. She was happy to see the barest hint of a smile on his lips. If he's making jokes, he's calmed down, she thought, relief relaxing her tense posture somewhat. As Severus began silently placing the items he would need for class on the table, Lily was struck with another satisfying realization.

He's talking to me, she mused. He's talking to me and he's being pleasant. That's a good sign.

When Severus stilled his movements, Lily took notice. His hands were gripping the edge of table, his eyes downcast, and his breathing deliberate. To Lily, it seemed that he was steeling himself in order to carry out some unsavory task.

"I... wasn't sure if you'd want to speak to me today," Severus said with trepidation.

"Why?" asked Lily. Puzzled, she ducked her head to see if she could catch his eye.

Severus took a deep breath, keeping his gaze on the table. Just as he was about to explain himself, Professor Slughorn bustled into the room and called for attention. Exasperated by his dreadfully bad timing, Lily wished that the Potions master would turn into the beach ball he so closely resembled and bounce back to wherever he came from.

"All right, then, everyone settle down," Professor Slughorn declared with forced joviality, waiting for everyone's attention. Lily briefly wondered why he seemed to be faking the cheerfulness that usually came naturally to him.

"It's been roughly a month since you were given your project assignments," he began with a smile that did not reach his eyes. "So today I'll be conferencing with you to assess your progress and offer assistance, if necessary. Since I'll be too busy conferring with students to effectively monitor any potion-brewing, I'm allowing you to use this time as a study period." With this pronouncement came a small chorus of appreciative sighs. As Professor Slughorn turned to prepare himself for the remainder of the period, his students began to clear away their Potions supplies.

Lily was still baffled by Severus's disclosure. She had made it very clear to him Saturday that she had every intention of speaking with him today. Seeing this brief transitional period as an opportunity to get some answers, Lily repeated, "Why? Why did you think I wouldn't want to talk to you, Severus?"

"Because I knew that Black would continue his smear campaign against me after the two of you left, and--"

"--you thought Sirius would manage to convince me that you played a part in Cressida's attack," Lily interrupted, her tone gentle with understanding.

"He certainly managed to convince Professor McGonagall," Severus replied contemptuously.

"Oh, Severus! You didn't get in trouble, did--"

"Miss Evans and Mr. Snape, I think I'll begin with the two of you," Professor Slughorn said with a soberness that was quite uncharacteristic for him.

Although she was irritated that he had once again interrupted their conversation, Lily forced herself to ask, "Professor, is everything all right?"

"Yes, Miss Evans," he replied with the same feigned happiness he had relied on when addressing the class earlier. "Everything is just fine! Now, I'm extremely interested in how my two star pupils have fared. How is the potion coming?"

Lily couldn't help noticing that he had yet to make eye contact with her. Since Professor Slughorn was bound and determined not to share what was bothering him, she decided to ignore his strange behavior.

"Well, sir, we haven't actually figured out what the potion is yet."

Professor Slughorn frowned as he made some notes on his parchment. "Hmmm... that is troubling. You've been working together on this, haven't you?"

"Yes, sir," Severus answered. "We've been researching since you first set the assignment and have come up short." It was usually difficult to tell what Severus was thinking, but the subtle strain in his voice told Lily that it bothered him greatly to admit that he was stumped.

"We decided on a different approach on Saturday, Professor," she said with a quick glance at Severus, hoping that this statement would take some of the sting away. "We're confident that we'll have it sussed out soon."

"Saturday, eh?" Professor Slughorn said rather distractedly. He took a deep breath, set his parchment and quill down on the table, and finally looked at Lily. "It's a wonder you were able to get anything done on Saturday, Miss Evans," he continued, his words laced with a whisper of woe.

Lily exchanged a quick, questioning glance with Severus before stammering, "B-beg your pardon, sir?"

The professor was nervously fidgeting with his hands, which were loosely clasped in front of him. "Please extend my apologies to Miss Corwin. I am very... ashamed that a student from my very own House caused her pain. Let her know that she can come to me if there is anything I can do to... to help."

Lily was dumbstruck for a moment. "Of-of course, I will, Professor Slughorn," she stuttered, forcing her brain and her mouth to cooperate with each other.

"I think Slytherin would have been a lot better off if the Sorting Hat had seen fit to place you in my House, Miss Evans. Perhaps some of your virtue would have rubbed off on certain students."

"Professor, you and I both know that if I had been Sorted into Slytherin, I would have been your only Slytherin," Lily wryly replied, a sly grin slowly inching across her face. "It would have made your job a lot easier, I'm sure."

"They may have surprised you. Maybe they would have accepted you with open arms."

"And maybe, by a freakishly bizarre set of circumstances, Severus and James Potter will bury the hatchet and become best mates." Lily stifled her laughter as Severus stared daggers in her direction. "It's possible," she added, turning her attention back to Professor Slughorn, "but highly unlikely... sir."

"Yes, I suppose the Sorting Hat knows best," Professor Slughorn replied, a trace of his usual cheery self emerging. "I have plenty of cheeky students in my House already. I don't think I could handle another." As he picked up his parchment and quill, Lily saw his mustache twitch a bit, and she knew she had successfully put an end to his gloomy mood.

"Well," Professor Slughorn continued after jotting down a few more notes, "all hope is not lost. You're cutting it a bit close, but you've still got time to brew your potion successfully. I suggest you discover what kind of potion you have sometime this week, or it will be too late."

"Yes, Professor," Lily and Severus said in unison. With a quick little bounce on the balls of his feet, Professor Slughorn turned to the pair of students sitting at the table next to them.

Lily turned to Severus and said, "That was very odd--"

"Shhh!" Severus responded, looking around the room as he did so.

Lily was peeved at being interrupted yet again. However, her irritation quickly turned into shock when she saw Severus discreetly aim his wand in Professor Slughorn's direction and mutter, "Muffliato."

"What did you just do?" Lily whispered frantically, her eyes widening in astonishment. "I can't believe you just cast a spell on a teacher!"

"I was surprised when I wasn't made a prefect," Severus randomly pondered aloud at a dismayingly high volume. "But I suppose casting spells on teachers doesn't quite make me prefect material, does it?"

"Say it a little louder, why don't you?" Lily hissed. "I can't believe you're being so cavalier about this!"

"Calm down. It's just a little spell that will allow us to continue talking without the fear that someone might overhear us. It is temporary and harmless. Trust me."

Lily cautiously looked around to see that Professor Slughorn was not paying them the slightest bit of attention, and neither was anyone else. "It didn't just work on him alone, did it?" she said, raising the volume of her voice slightly.

"I aimed the spell in his direction, but it actually works on anyone in the immediate vicinity."

"It's an awfully handy spell, isn't it?" As a prefect, Lily knew she should be turning Severus in, but her insatiable curiosity got the better of her. "Where'd you find it?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

Severus was being difficult on purpose. Over the last few weeks, Lily had learned that this was his way of being playful with her. Nevertheless, it could be extremely exasperating at times.

With a roll of her eyes, Lily said, "Fine, Severus. Keep your little secrets." Reaching into her bag for the professional journals Severus had checked out from the library, she added, "You'd better take out something to study to keep up appearances."

As Severus took several journals out of his own bag, he said, "I hope you didn't fall for Slughorn's little performance."

"Why wouldn't I take him at his word?"

"It is obvious that he's just trying to save face. Now that Evan's been exposed as a pervert, he's embarrassed and worried about the affect it will have on Slytherin and on him in particular."

"Of course you think he had ulterior motives, Severus--you're a cynic," Lily said matter-of-factly, her hand propping up her head as she flipped through the pages of the autumn 1975 edition of The Healers' Quarterly. "I, on the other hand, am an optimist. I try to see the good in people, and I choose to believe that he was genuinely concerned about Cressida."

"Optimism is a word used by trusting fools so they can live with themselves and the stupid choices they make based on their gullibility," he said smugly, his black eyes scanning the pages of the journal which lay open in front of him.

Lily's hand jerked, and she accidentally tore the corner of the page she was turning. As she quickly repaired the damage, she replied, "I should be offended by that, but I'm not. Instead, I'm just going to sit here, happy in the knowledge that without my gullibility, this little friendship we have here never would have happened."

Severus looked up from his journal, a bland expression on his face. "And that matters to me because..."

"You like me, Severus Snape," Lily drawled, flashing what she hoped was her most wicked grin at him. "Admit it." Although his facial expression never changed, Lily was delighted to see the affect these words had on Severus, his pallid skin blanching even more.

"I tolerate you," Severus responded a little too calmly. "Big difference."

"Says the bloke who was worried I'd give him the silent treatment today."

"I should have known I wouldn't have been that lucky," he mumbled.

"Oh, ha, ha," she acerbically intoned.

A comfortable silence descended upon the pair as they quietly regarded each other. After a few moments, they both returned to their respective journals. Lily smiled to herself as she thought about how relaxed she felt around Severus now. The two of them were in a good place, and she was loath to rock the boat. But if their friendship had any chance of surviving, there were still some issues they had to discuss.

Reluctantly deciding it was time to face the music, Lily anxiously tucked her hair behind her ear. "I was worried, too."

"About what?" asked Severus absentmindedly, the majority of his attention having returned to his reading.

"I didn't think you'd want to talk to me today either, especially after you'd had a chance to really think about what I did."

Frowning, Severus looked up from the journal. "After what you did? What are you talking--oh," he said as he cottoned on, "my journal. I'd nearly forgotten about that."

"Well, I didn't forget," Lily mumbled, wringing her hands underneath the table.

Severus took a deep breath, his mouth a grim line. "I was extremely angry about it--at first. After I had a chance to think about it, though, I realized that had our roles been reversed, I probably would have done the same thing.

"Of course," Severus continued, cocking his right eyebrow as only he could, "if I had done it, you never would have caught me in the act. I suggest that you never turn to a life of crime. You're not very stealthy, and you're a terrible liar to boot."

Lily's eyes widened in disbelief, not only because of his admission, but also because of his willingness to forgive her so easily. "So that's it? I'm forgiven just like that?"

Severus nodded slowly. "Yes. Truth be told, I had already forgiven you before you left with Black. Besides, I had other things on my mind this weekend."

"That's right! We've been interrupted so many times that I'd nearly forgotten what you said at the beginning of class. You said that Sirius managed to convince Professor McGonagall that you helped Evan. Sirius didn't get you in trouble, did he?"

Severus simply stared at Lily for several moments. Baffled by his strange behavior, she waved her hand in front his face and said, "Are you still with me?"

Severus knitted his brows together and leaned away from Lily's hand. "Of course I am, but..." His voice trailed off as his features relaxed. "You didn't listen to him?"

"Surely by now you don't think..." Lily couldn't believe that even after all this time, Severus still thought she believed him to be the type of person who could sit idly by while he knew someone was being harmed.

"You've been talking to me, but I'm not really sure what you believe about my... involvement," said Severus solemnly. His posture was stiff, and his fists were clenched on the tabletop.

At that moment, Lily realized that he needed to hear her say how she felt, just as she had needed to hear that he forgave her for what she had done. "When we first left you in that classroom, Sirius tried his best to convince me of how guilty you were. As gullible as I may be, I do have a brain. I told him that I know you a lot better than he does and that he was wrong about you."

"You did?"

"Yes, I did. Right away, I made it very plain that he couldn't change my mind. So he dropped it; never mentioned it again."

Severus was silent as he took in this new information. It seemed to Lily that he was still unconvinced.

"Honestly," she said with a reassuring grin, "do you think I'd be sitting here talking and joking with you all this time if I thought you had anything to do with what happened to my best friend?" She rolled her eyes and turned back to her journal before she muttered, "And you're supposed to be clever? Humph!" From the corner of her eye, Lily could see his hands relaxing.

"Thank you." The words drifted out of his mouth on a whisper so soft, Lily barely heard them.

"For what?" she asked, mimicking his soft tone as she turned another page.

"For... believing in me. No one has ever..." He left the statement hanging in the air between them, unfinished.

Lily's hand paused over the journal. Their conversation had gotten very serious, very quickly. She knew it had taken a lot for Severus to admit something so personal to her, especially in the middle of Potions. He had obviously put a lot of trust in his nifty little Muffliato spell. However, Lily had not. She thought it was best for the both of them if she steered their conversation in another direction.

"You don't have to thank me for that," she said nonchalantly as she resumed her page turning. "We're friends; it comes with the kit."

"The kit?"

"Mm-hmm," she answered. "Loyalty and trust are included in the Friendship Kit. It also comes with humor, understanding, and a sample-sized jar of annoyance."

"Well, my kit must be defective. I think I received an industrial-sized vat of annoyance in mine."

Lily turned slightly in her seat, facing Severus as she asked, "Am I really that bad?"

"On occasion, yes. But for the most part, I suppose 'sample-size' would be an accurate description," he muttered grudgingly. "To finally answer your question, no, I didn't get in trouble with McGonagall."

Lily released a relieved breath. "I'm glad. So, what happened?"

Severus turned back to his own journal, as a frowning Professor Slughorn walked by their table. He had his finger in his ear and was wiggling it inside the entrance of his ear canal, as if he was trying to dislodge something. Lily suspected it had something to do with Severus's spell.

"I was summoned to her office after breakfast yesterday," Severus said, his eyes glued to the journal in front of him. "She said that since such a serious allegation had been made she had to investigate it.

"So," he sighed as he continued, "she asked a lot of questions, and I suppose I gave the right answers. Seeing as she had absolutely no proof, just Sirius Black's word--which really isn't worth much--she couldn't connect me with the attack."

"And she let you go?"

Severus nodded. "She let me go."

"You should thank your lucky stars that's all she did," Lily mumbled. "I was there when Professor McGonagall found out what happened, and I don't think a word has been invented to describe how angry she was. It was really scary. To think that she might have unleashed just the tiniest bit of that on you..." She shuddered slightly at the thought.

"In all honesty, it really wasn't as bad as all that. I'm not saying that we had a laugh over it or anything, but she wasn't ready to rip me from limb to limb, either. Maybe she had calmed down by then, I don't know."

"I'm sure she never really believed it in the first place, but since Sirius was so adamant that you were involved, I suppose she didn't have a choice. Still, I'm sorry you had to go through any of that, Severus."

Lily looked down at her right hand, which was a hair's breadth away from his. Her fingers itched to give his hand a reassuring squeeze, but remembering his earlier reaction to her touch, she thought better of it. "You know, as much as I want to be angry with Sirius, I just can't do it. He was there for Cressida when I couldn't be."

"I know this isn't over, at least not for him," Severus murmured nastily. He lifted his head slightly as he said, "I can feel him staring at me, even now."

Without looking, Lily knew that he was right. Yet she nudged her bag off the table and onto the floor, quickly taking a look toward the back of the room as she picked it up. As expected, Sirius was indeed boring holes into the back of Severus's head with his eyes. Lily sighed deeply as she straightened herself in her seat. She was already beginning to feel exhausted by the inevitable prospect of having to convince Sirius to leave Severus alone.

"You're right; it's not over for Sirius, but what about you, Severus? Is it over for you?"

Severus was silent for a moment, apparently contemplating his response. "I'm angry, but not necessarily with Black," he admitted gruffly. "I think he is a complete and utter idiot, but I felt that way long before Saturday, and I'm fairly certain that he won't be proving me wrong any time soon. Having said that, if he stays out of my way, I'll stay out of his."

Lily was surprised by this disclosure. So if he isn't mad at Sirius and he isn't mad at me... Then it hit her. There was only one other person involved in this whole nasty affair for Severus to be angry with.

"So, it's Evan, isn't it?" she inquired. "You're saving all your anger for Evan."

"He--used--me." The words were strained through his clenched teeth. "I never would have been in the position to be accused if he hadn't put me there." Seeming to realize how tense he was, Severus relaxed his jaws. "I'm glad his parents are pulling him out of Hogwarts. I'll be rid of him for good."

"WHAT?" Lily's mouth exclaimed before her brain could stop it. She immediately clamped her lips shut to prevent another loud outburst from escaping. Muffliato or not, she was sure somebody must have heard that. She quickly looked around and was relieved to see that everyone else remained completely oblivious.

Once the initial shock wore off, Lily continued. "Evan's parents are withdrawing him?"

Severus frowned slightly. "Slytherins have been talking about it all day; I just assumed the news had made it through the length of the school's grapevine by now."

"But why?"

"His parents were none too pleased about his punishment. They're under the mistaken impression that he can do no wrong." Severus smirked and made a small, derisive noise in the back of this throat before continuing. "Apparently, the Rosiers are either incredibly deluded or incredibly stupid. At any rate, they're sending him to Durmstrang. They're going to let him finish out the term here while they make arrangements for him there."

Lily was quiet for a moment as she mulled over the implications of this new development. She didn't know whether to be thrilled or furious about it. On the one hand, it would be a relief for Cressida. She wouldn't have to constantly look over her shoulder for fear that Evan would somehow finish what he started. On the other hand, Evan had always struck Lily as a spoiled brat who was used to getting his own way. Now his parents had proven this to be true. By pulling him out of Hogwarts, his parents were reinforcing the idea that Evan could do whatever he wanted without having to deal with any consequences. In fact, the more Lily thought about it, the more she wanted Evan to stay at Hogwarts.

"Severus," she said distractedly, "do you know anything about Durmstrang? I mean, is it a good school?"

"Evan's parents wouldn't be sending him there if it wasn't. I don't know much about it, except that it has the second largest collection of Dark Arts books in Europe." Severus paused briefly and gave Lily a meaningful glance. "Three guesses where the largest collection is housed."

"Somehow," she replied as she looked at the stone walls surrounding them, "I don't think I'll need three guesses."

Lily saw the corner of Severus's mouth upturn ever so slightly before he said, "Unlike our own school, Durmstrang doesn't have a Restricted Section."

Lily felt a cold chill creep down her back as her mind put the pieces together. "So not only will Evan not be punished for what he did to Cressa, he's going to have easy access to some of the worst spells ever created."

"And that is why he looked like the cat that swallowed the canary when I saw him this morning."

"Of course," Lily whispered to herself. "That's why the headmaster didn't expel him. He must have been worried that Evan's parents would send him to Durmstrang if he did."

"Maybe I'll get lucky," Severus mumbled to his journal. "Maybe Dumbledore will boot him out anyway, now that he knows Evan's parents are going to send him to Durmstrang no matter what he does."

"No." Lily began to slowly shake her head, as if the action would erase the last few words out of Severus's mouth. "No, no, no! I can't believe I'm about to say this, but Evan can't leave. Maybe Professor Dumbledore can convince Evan's parents to change their minds."

"Why?" Severus lifted his head and regarded Lily as though she'd gone round the twist. "The sooner he's gone, the better off a lot of people will be. Besides, there is no point in trying to change his father's mind. For years, Evan has said that the only reason his father sent him here instead of Durmstrang was out of some sense of patriotic duty. Now that he feels that his son has been wronged, I suppose indignation cancels out patriotism."

"But Evan Rosier has to stay here at Hogwarts," Lily said, vehemently emphasizing her words by slapping her hand on the table. "He has to be punished for what he's done. He just has to be."

"Lily," Severus calmly intoned as he turned his head back to the periodical in front of him, "people may not be able to hear you, but they can still see you. Calm down, before you get both of us in trouble."

"You don't get it, Severus!" Her earlier reluctance forgotten, Lily grabbed Severus by the wrist as she said, "Not only have his parents given him a Get Out of Jail Free card, they're about to reward him by letting him go to a school that will teach him how to be even more of a bastard than he already is. It isn't fair!"

Severus blew out an exasperated breath as he tried to pry Lily's fingers off his wrist. "Look, it may not be fair, and it may not be right, but it is happening--whether you like it or not. And could you please release my arm?"

Blushing violently, Lily immediately did as Severus asked and folded her hands in her lap. "Sorry," she murmured, shamefaced.

"As I was saying," he continued, rubbing away at the dents left behind by Lily's death grip, "there's nothing you or I can do about it. Stop focusing on what may be and focus on what is."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You're worrying about something that hasn't even happened yet," Severus said in an exasperated tone that suggested he had grown tired of this topic of conversation. "Evan won't be here to cause any more trouble for you, me, or anyone else. That's something, isn't it?"

Lily was quiet for several moments as she let his words bounce around in her brain. When the full weight of what he had said settled on her, she could scarcely believe that the words had been issued from his mouth.

"Severus Snape... are you trying to tell me to look on the bright side?"

"Absolutely not," he answered with a scowl. "I don't tell people to look on the bright side. It is completely against my nature to do so." Severus shifted his eyes, quickly scanning the room as if to ensure they weren't overheard, his handy little spell notwithstanding. "Nevertheless, I forbid you to mention this conversation to anyone, on pain of death."

"On pain of death?" she repeated, covering her mouth to hide the hysterical giggling. "Oh, you sure know how to cheer a girl up, don't you?"

"Well, I seem to have tickled your fancy," Severus drolly replied. "Lily Evans is amused, and all is right with the world."

"I heard that, Mr. Personality. You were right, by the way," Lily mumbled reluctantly.

Severus cocked his ear in her direction as he said, "I'm sorry, I didn't catch that last bit. Would you please speak up?"

"I said you were right," she replied with a roll of her eyes.

"Since I happen to be right about most things, you'll have to be more specific."

"To the infallible Severus Snape, I apologize most profusely," Lily entreated, her hands clasped together in feigned reverence. "You were right about me looking on the bright side."

"I never said that! You never heard those words coming out of my mouth, so stop trying to put them there!"

Enjoying his protestations, Lily bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing out loud. When she was sure she would do nothing more than grin, she said, "There isn't anything I can do about any of this except be thankful that Evan won't be here to terrorize Cressa anymore."

"And the moral of today's exercise in procrastination is--"

"Erm... I thought we established that it's to look on the bright side," she interrupted, smirking.

"Noooo," Severus replied, drawing out the word as if he were speaking to someone with a limited grasp of the English language. "The moral is that I am always right, so you should have listened to me in the first place. If you had, we could have ended this conversation some time ago, and we might have actually got some work done today."

Lily scoffed, "I wonder how in the world I've been able to function these last sixteen years without your wisdom guiding every decision I make."

Severus briefly narrowed his eyes. "Have you always been this snarky?"

"Well, according to a source who shall remain nameless," Lily began as her mind briefly revisited her encounter with Sirius in the corridor a fortnight ago, "you tend to bring out the snarkiness in me."

"I'm serious, you know."

"Have you ever been anything but?"

"We've wasted the better part of a perfectly good study period with frivolities. Don't you think our time would have been better spent if we had, oh I don't know, actually studied?"

"Maybe," Lily replied thoughtfully, "but we needed to talk, and I'm glad we did. There's not a doubt in my mind that we'll have this thing figured out before the week is over, but since you're so worried about it, let's meet up later on and make up for all of the time we've... wasted." She went back to scanning the article in front of her as she waited for a response. After several minutes had passed, she looked up to see Severus frowning.

"You mean another study session... with just the two of us?" he asked.

"Is... is there a problem with that?"

"No, no, of course not," Severus answered while making a production out of turning the page of the book in front of him.

Lily was unconvinced as his swift response and body language confirmed that there was indeed a problem. Then she remembered Saturday and everything that happened before Sirius burst into the room--her outburst, her tears, his comforting arms, and his thumb wiping those tears away. Of course he doesn't want to be alone with me, she thought, a blush of embarrassment warming her face. He probably thinks I'm a basket case!

"Er... Severus?" she said with trepidation. "I usually only have one deranged outburst a year, and you happened to be there Saturday to witness it. I promise I won't have another breakdown, okay?"

Unmoving, Severus glanced at Lily from the corner of his eye. "Is six o'clock all right with you?"

He still wants to meet me! Lily thought. I suppose this means that he doesn't think I'm some weepy, clingy freak. Immensely pleased by this, Lily relaxed her tense shoulders and replied, "Six o'clock is just fine." With that, she returned to her reading, biting her bottom lip to keep from grinning insanely.