Sanguis Novus

Chapter Five: The Sorting

"Lily!"

"I am awake...dammit," she grumbled, adding on the swear word. Her parents had always preached of finding more colorful and appropriate language than four-letter words to expressing strong emotions, and Lily had followed their lead faithfully. However, she had never felt so overwrought and drained in her entire life, yet still so energetic, and she could find no other way of putting it. "Remus, is there anything wrong with just closing my eyes for awhile?"

She lay back down on the bottom of the skiff, her small body curled into a ball, but she could no more sleep than anyone else. Visibly shivering, she reached for her cloak, which was lying nearby. Her heart was beating uncomfortably loud. Opening her eyes just a crack, she saw Remus looking down at her, obviously trying to see if she really was asleep.

She was finding it very difficult to stop fidgeting with the fringes of her cloak, her hands, and anything that could be fondled with. The mere sighting of Hogwarts had sent a plunging freeze through her body. As her eyes roamed over the aged stone walls, the innumerable turrets and towers, she dived off her seat on the boat and, instead, hid under it. Of course, she soon discovered it was more than cramped down there, so she moved to a more open space. Though she had shut her eyes in a feeble attempt to block out Hogwarts, the formidable appearance of the school and the accompanying feeling of awe kept her mind entranced, and James's constant sniggering didn't help either.

"Will you shut up?" she spat at them, giving up the false pretense of being asleep.

"Why? Disturbing your little nappy?" Sirius taunted. "Is little baby Lily nervous? Is she frightened of the big scary castle?"

"C'mon, quit it," Remus said, sounding unusually impatient. "I'm nervous too, and you've got to be too, right, Sirius?"

"Hell no!" He stretched leisurely, accidentally kicking Lily. "Why would I be nervous? Everybody knows what's going to happen. I'm gonna get sorted into Slytherin, be prefect, Head Boy, everything perfect and expected of a Black, and then when I leave Hogwarts, I'll be all fit to help Lord Voldemort purge the world of Muggles and Mudbl - "

"Shh!" James whispered, tilting his head at Lily.

"Huh?" Sirius asked, his voice still at an unbearably loud tone.

"She's one of...you know..."

"One of them?"

"Yes, you moron!"

"ONE OF THEM? HERE?"

"Shut up! My God, all of Hogwarts probably heard that, not to mention all of the first years. Well, there goes one year of peace. Great job, mate!"

"But, blimey, one of...she's a - "

"Will you please shut up?" Remus reiterated. "You'll, you know, disturb her and...we can't have her..." The exchanged glances of the three boys that followed signified that they understood what they had to do, and as different as each one of them were - the lord, the rebel, and the outcast - at that moment, they were united under a single purpose, and really, one that would carry them through the rest of their school days.

Sirius then looked away, seeming ill at ease.

The vibrations beneath jolted Lily rudely, and she sat up, rubbing her eyes. Dazedly, she swiveled around and found herself trapped. Forcing rationality upon her wild thoughts, she told herself it was just a wall - a very large wall of Hogwarts. She had come at last. With a soft grinding noise, the first years disembarked on the grassy slopes that led to the towering oak doors. And past those? What could be there? For the time being, she didn't dare to think about it. Trying to alleviate some of the trepidation, she staunchly fixed her eyes on the back of the gamekeeper's large overcoat, which she could still see through the pack separating them. He had been there to greet the first years at Hogsmeade train station, giving them all a cheery wave. She had found his eccentric accent and his nature oddly comforting.

"Don't be too nervous!" Remus told her soothingly.

"Yeah," Sirius remarked nonchalantly, "we'll catch you if you faint."

"I am not going to faint!"

"Wanna bet?"

"No thank you," she huffed, supremely indifferent.

"Great going, mate," James hissed in a joking manner as she stomped away. "I can tell you are going to be extremely popular with the ladies."

"Of course I will!" Sirius exclaimed, his face turning livid. "By third year, I'll have girls lining up in bloody long queues just to see me, oh, and then she'll see..."

"Why third year?" James laughed. "D'you first need two years to perfect your flirting skills?"

"Calm down, alright?" Remus said. "Lily's a little on edge, and it's natural for people like that to be a little irritable. Take it easy - don't raise your blood pressure before you have to."

"Filthy Mudblood, I'll kill her!"

"Okay, Sirius, that was uncalled for."

"I don't care. She had absolutely no right to talk back to me like that. After all, I'm a Black - "

"And," James cut in, "weren't you saying on the train that you didn't give a damn about your last name, hmm? So are you using it now as your defense?"

Sirius could not find a commensurate rebuttal for this indisputable fact and only stared glumly ahead at the swinging red hair off in the distance. Not wasting anytime, Remus caught up with a stormy Lily.

"He didn't mean it, you know," he said.

"That still doesn't give him any right to insult me," she said in a voice that was smoothed over but still barbed and dangerous.

"He wasn't insulting you."

"He insulted me, Remus, and he's been insulting me, and it gets really annoying!"

"Sirius just, you know, likes to joke around a bit. You'll just have to get used to it."

"But what if I don't want to?" she shot back venomously.

He thought for a while before answering.

"Because sometimes, we have to do things we don't necessarily want to do, but we still have to, right?" he countered. "Like me, for example. I - I almost didn't want to come to Hogwarts."

"Seriously?" she exclaimed, aghast.

"Seriously."

"Why would that be?"

"It's sort of a long story," he said, looking away. "Anyway, that's beside the point. It'll be hard, especially for someone so..."

"Someone so what?"

"Well," he started uncomfortably, "someone so strong-willed...with a short temper to boot."

Cringing, he expected a good verbal lashing from Lily for calling her such, but she only laughed.

"Remus, Remus," she sighed, "I don't think I've ever met anyone so brutally honest in my life."

He raised an eyebrow, about to say something. However, he, Lily, and the rest of the students were stopped just short of the front door. The gamekeeper lifted his massive hand and rapped on it a few times with his knuckles. The hollow throbbing sound of wood made her tremble. Within a few seconds, a witch with a taut and aging face, only further accentuated by the tightly pulled-back hair (black, like James's, Lily thought), appeared in front of them, casting an almost disdainful look at the first years.

"Thank you very much, Hagrid," she sniffed. "I will take them from here; you may head back to your duties. First years, follow me, please."

"Always nice ter help, Minerva," the gamekeeper named Hagrid said, bowing slightly.

Immensely frightened of the green-robed witch, Lily looked pleadingly at him, willing him to make eye contact with her. She didn't want to leave him - his height made him seem especially protective. Amazingly, she caught his eye, his demeanor half apologetic, half optimistic.

"That doesn't help," she muttered to herself as she was led into Hogwarts's vestibule, fit with a sweeping ceiling and candlesticks suspended in midair, their flames dancing perilously.

Despite her overwhelmingly dark thoughts, Lily couldn't resist being awed by the grandeur of the castle. Her drumming heart ceased to beat for a moment so swept away was she by the richness of the Wizarding world, her world.

"Welcome, first years, to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. My name is Professor Minerva McGonagall for those who do not know yet."

"We all know you!" James called out, flashing a smile at her and making many students laugh, though their gaiety was still fringed with unease.

Lily felt extremely out of place. She didn't know the Professor.

"Potter," she said lightly, "I thought I would see you here, but please, do not interrupt. There are those - " her eyes roamed across the crowd, seeming to look for no one in particular, and to Lily's horror, they landed on her " - who do not. Anyway, to continue before Mr. Potter here interrupted. The entire school is already seated in the Great Hall, which is further down this hallway. There, you will be sorted into your Houses, and after that, Hogwarts shall treat you to a delicious welcoming feast. At this time, I would like you to follow me into the Great Hall."

Here we go, Lily told herself, at last relieved of Professor McGonagall's sharp eyes. Here I am at last, the border between two worlds.

"Do you know what you're about to do?" Remus said to her under his breath.

"I believe so," she replied, breathing slowly to calm her palpitating heart. "I read about it in the book they sent me. They're going to 'sort' us all into 'Houses,' which are - hold on, I know this - Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Yes, that's right."

"Hmm, what book did they send you?"

"The Basic Muggle's Guide to Everything Wizarding, the updated edition."

"Well, I reckon a lot of people would've liked to have received that book over the summer."

"Why is that?"

"You already know quite a bit, especially for a Mu - I mean, Muggle-born."

"Do I? That book said it would only give me the very basics. Didn't want to spoil the surprise, I guess."

"Take a look at those half-bloods over there."

"Over where?" Lily complained, jumping up and down vainly in order to see them. "What do half-bloods look like?"

"Never mind," Remus muttered, pressing a firm hand down on her shoulder. "Stop hopping around; we're there."

Blood, she thought. I hate that word - it's all wizards ever bloody talk about. You think they'd find something else to be obsessed about, like the cinema. They love it so much they've even made words out of it: purebloods, Mudbloods, whatnot. But whatever brooding thoughts Lily had been thinking were dispersed when she walked into the Great Hall. The school's foyer was impressive, she thought, but this is a million times better. Following the lead of many other first years, she arched her neck back and gasped.

"It's the enchanted ceiling!" she heard someone say. "It mirrors the sky right above it."

Enchanted, Lily thought, would be an understatement. To her, it was as if the room had no ceiling, and the walls stretching upward unto infinite heights, the land of sun and clouds and perpetually blue skies. The night was a velvety black, bordering on the deepest shade of violet, a few stray wisps of cloud drifting by and temporarily obscuring the stars, the stars that were always so colorless - were their tints of a creamy yellow, faint blue, or simply white? - yet so dazzling that if all the candles in the school were extinguished, they would provide enough radiance to compensate.

Her head still tilted backwards, she accidentally bumped into the person in front of her.

"What the hell are you doing?" he hissed back, alarming Lily.

"I'm - I'm sorry, I wasn't watching where I was walk - "

"Shut up!" James said to her, his eyes focused intently on a point in front of him.

Taking his cue, she looked that way as well. Standing on her toes, she could see a tiny little wizard, carrying a wooden stool, dressed in the most eccentric robes she had ever seen hobble onto a raised platform in front of the first years. After setting the stool down, he brandished a ragged hat from behind him and, with all the care in the world, laid it on the stool's seat, as if he was consecrating the piece of furniture. One short bow to the hall later, he left the stage and all of the attention was fixed on the hat. Lily, for one, could not see what was so extraordinary about it. Had she been running the school, the hat would have been thrown away ages ago. To her disbelief, the brim of the hat ripped open and it launched into a song. However, the heat being emitted by the many candles was beginning to take its toll on Lily (along with the growing nausea inside of her), and she became disoriented and dizzy, her head splitting with discomfort and stabs of pain. Her unresponsive ears deflected the hat's words; her eyes shut to block out to throbbing in her head. Only the thundering applause from the students shook her out of her agonizing reverie.

"When I read your name from this roll of parchment," Professor McGonagall announced, Lily barely catching the words, "you will walk onto the stage by way of the stairs to either side, put the hat on, and then sit down on the stool. The Sorting Hat will then pass its judgment as to where you will be sorted, and after it has made its decision, please sit down at your House table." Unrolling a scroll of parchment in her hands, she called out, "Avery, Sebastian!"

The boy Lily had bumped into earlier now swaggered onto the stage, his chestnut colored hair catching the light of the candles. She heard a few shouts of, "GO AVERY!" from a table on the far left and she craned her neck to see it. Above them was draped an emerald green tapestry on which a brilliantly silver snake danced and seemed to be hissing with elation.

"Remus, are those the Slytherins?"

"Indeed," he answered somewhat disdainfully, his eyebrows furrowing.

Lily suddenly remembered that was the house Sirius said he was going to be sorted into. Quite honestly, she couldn't imagine someone as cheerful as him in a crowd that appeared as...well...something certainly seemed off about them. As she struggled to put a word to the Slytherins' bearings, a picture fleeted across her mind and she reached for it, yearning for it. The Slytherins, she thought, look a lot like someone I know...but impossible! I don't know a Slytherin by name. Annoyed, she looked away from the raucous table. Her eyes fell on James, and she noticed his slim body was quite still, though he, too, was looking on Avery with undisguised anticipation. As she felt her stomach lurch again, Lily looked into his serene hazel eyes, not knowing how anyone could remain so at peace, so unaffected and almost apathetic about something so life changing.

That's it.

That's it! she thought. The Slytherins - they're, why, they're practically bored by this insipid ceremony. For me, it's the most exciting and scariest thing I'll ever have to go through, and here they are, acting as if it was just another day, just another day in life. It's like...it's like they know. They know what it is to enjoy life, to indulge in life, to know what it is to be happy and comfortable so they don't have to take anything from the Sorting. They're...satisfied with everything they've already got and really don't care at all for this. Like James, except I'm sure he cares more than they do. Well, if he does, he definitely isn't showing it. The Slytherins - it's as if they're a totally separate class of people...like the First and Second Estates in France...

Fear flooded Lily. If they were truly like the upper class of pre-1789 France, then they would be just as oppressive, just as uncaring for the woes of others, the opposite of compassion, existing only to further their own cause. Dear God, she thought. One-fourth of Hogwarts is going to be made up of self-absorbed idiots. She looked over at Sirius warily. Well, she decided, he's an idiot for sure, but not of that kind. Look, he seems a little bit nervous!

"SLYTHERIN!" the hat shouted, sending shocks through her body.

Yells of all sorts, including rather rude and school-inappropriate comments, erupted from the Slytherin table, and she immediately decided that if the sodding hat put her in that house, she'd throw it in Professor McGonagall's face and storm out of the school. Better to be back with freak-hating Petunia than with people with no sense of restraint. Avery knocked the hat off his head without even the courtesy of placing it back atop the stool and joined his Housemates in celebration, a smug look resting on his face. Lily watched as a piercing gray-eyed student - at least, she assumed he was a student; he looked so very mature - lean over and whisper something in his ear. Grinning sadistically, the first year nodded. Curious, she kept her sight focused on the gray-eyed one and his neatly groomed blond hair. No, it wasn't blond but more of a silvery sheen. Maybe he could teach James how to brush his hair properly, she thought, snickering silently.

Turning away from the Slytherin table, she looked at Professor McGonagall.

"Black, Sirius!"

The thunderous shouts that filled the Great Hall provoked many students to shake their heads in disapproval. Lily, however, clapped her hands over her ears, thinking disbelievingly that the cheers for him were even louder and heart pounding than those for the previous student. Looking up, she saw minute particles of dust drifting from the seemingly limitless ceiling, a most precise measurement of the deafening sounds that threatened to make Hogwarts collapse. Looking mortified, the ingenuous faced Sirius stumbled onto the stage, also clearly alarmed by the unanimously positive response from his House-to-be. The beads of sweat dripping from his forehead were obscured as he, quivering slightly, lifted the Sorting Hat and placed it on his head. Abruptly, the cheers died down and it seemed as if a trance befell the Slytherin table. Heads bowed demurely and eyes cast down, they hardly appeared to be the boisterous noisemakers they were just seconds before. Why, she thought, it's as if they're worshipping him, like he's some sort of god, or maybe he's the priest and the Sorting Hat's a god, and they're waiting for the priest to interpret the god's words.

No one had to wait long for the deity's judgment.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

A deathly silence hung in the air; there were no screams of approval, not even scattered applause. Sirius, now having removed the hat, remained on the stage, his pallid face and soft eyes scanning the crowd of students, imploring them for some response. Feeling every bit sympathetic for him and his coldly distant Hogwarts greeting, Lily, too, looked around. There were the Slytherins - many were still stunned but most bore looks of hatred on their faces, their eyes shining like black jewels. There were the Gryffindors - half of them seemed as if they had been badly smacked, and the other half donning condescending looks.

"Mr. Black," Professor McGonagall said, her nostrils on the verge of flaring, "the Sorting must continue. Will you please walk to your respective House table?"

"Y-yes, Professor," he managed to croak.

Tripping over the stool, he made his way down to the ethereally quiet Gryffindor table, and found an empty seat. Cautiously, he sat down and then proceeded to bury his face in his arms. A muffled sobbing filled the Hall, and it sat through it, still soundless.

"GO SIRIUS!" James impulsively yelled, catching the entire Hall off guard.

Though he was clapping his hands so enthusiastically it was bordering on painful, his eyes were tightly clenched, trying to allow the tears to subside.

"Mr. Potter?"

The applause ceased.

"Yes, Professor?" he said innocently, looking up, his eyes dry.

"Would it be possible for you to stop causing such a racket? Your professors won't be having a good first impression of you, you know that."

A few good-natured laughs were heard, and this made James flush with pride.

"Well," he began slowly, "then I'll have to work extra hard to fix that, won't I, Professor?"

Someone wearing a delighted grin from the Ravenclaw table punched him lightly on the back and whispered something in his ear, provoking a stifled laugh on James's behalf. Ironing the smile off his face, he turned back to Professor McGonagall, his shoulders back and head raised high.

"Mr. Potter," she said harshly, "that can begin now. See me after the feast please."

"Ouch!" the Ravenclaw said out loud. "She outscored you on that one, Potter."

"Just shut your mouth, will you?" Lily snapped at him, eager for the Sorting to continue, though observing it only deteriorated her uneasy disposition.

Professor McGonagall, too, glared at him reproachfully as if to say, "If you keep up your antics you'll join your friend Potter after all this is over."

"Bones, Edgar!" she announced, her voice still laced with frustration.

Without knowing why, the Slytherins, led by the silver-haired student Lily had been somewhat interested in, began to mock him, calling him horrifying names that she tried to pretend she never heard. Why are they saying these things about him? she thought, taken aback by the Slytherins' enthusiastic vehemence. There doesn't seem to be anything - wrong about him. In fact, he looks extremely likable.

"FILTHY HALF-BLOOD!" someone yelled. "LET'S SWITCH YOU AND BLACK!"

Lily whipped around, her lower lip shaking indignantly.

"How dare they call him 'filthy'?" she scoffed. "They're the filthy ones!"

"Be quiet," Remus told her. "Don't say that."

"Why?" she pressed, though in a lower volume. "Don't tell me you agree with what they're saying? You've heard 'em! It's disgusting!"

"Of course I don't, but now isn't the right time to stage a protest. This is the way things have always been. There's no point in questioning them, especially at this very time."

"Yeah? Well, Martin Luther King questioned and protested against what had always been done, and look at what he managed to do!" she said, remembering having read a newspaper article on the American Civil Rights Movement.

"But this Martin Luther King person wasn't a wizard, was he?"

"I give up," Lily huffed, and immediately after she did so, the hat informed the crowd Edgar Bones was to be in Hufflepuff. The table to her right cheered on as the scarlet-faced boy joined their kind, but it was not to the outrageous level of the Slytherins. They look like a pleasant group of people, she thought. I wouldn't mind being in that House.

The next few Sortings or so elicited more jeering from the Slytherins that could not be outdone by the meek (in comparison) response from the other three tables. Not being able to hear any of the Sorting Hat's decisions, Lily threw her arms up in defeat, losing interest in the Sorting. Stomach gurgling, she darkling wondered when this entire ideal would all be over and she could settle down for a full and satisfying meal. At the rate this is going, she thought, it'll be a long night. With no dinner too, she added as an afterthought.

"Remus," she said, "I'm bored."

"How? Your name's almost up."

Wait...

My name?

"But, how is it...I thought there were going through people with last names that began with C!"

"Well, they just finished with the D's. You weren't paying attention?"

"Er, no," Lily tried to say in an offhand way.

"Shh, they're calling the next name! It might be you - I wouldn't bet on there being many E's."

Dear Lord, she thought, me? But...but I'm not ready for this! I'm not ready for it at all! Oh, God, oh, God, why do I have to get nervous now? Technically, I've been nervous since...I forget, really, but -

"Estelle, Helen!"

Simultaneously overtaken by relief and bracing herself for further noise from the Slytherins (or any other table at that), the rolling sound of murmuring filled the Hall. Students were jabbering to their peers in hushed tones, and Lily immediately realized that something had gone wrong. It didn't take long for her to learn what.

"Bloody hell!" James whispered, the blood drained out of his face. "A Muggle-born! Here! Now! In Hogwarts!"

Other first years nodded enthusiastically and gaped onward as Helen strode up to the Sorting Hat. She was of small build, her perfectly straight chocolate brown hair trailing down her back. Her face was trying to fix itself into more placid lines as if to say to the Hall, "Hah, so much for your little gossip!" but was failing dreadfully. A Mudblood.

Is this then, Lily thought, what it will be like when I walk up there? An entire room full for people just staring at me because I'm norm - er, a Muggle? No, I'm not a Muggle. A Mudblood - that's what they call me. A Mudblood. Muddy blood, right? That's probably where they got it from. There will be no one and nothing to welcome me but stares and odd looks. Maybe even Remus won't like me anymore and everything that I wanted and thought would really happen won't. And it'll just be like I was back at home: a total and complete freak, hated and suspected - of what? - by all.

Thus were her thoughts as she caught something that sounded remarkably like "Evans" and was goaded forward by a jab in the back. As her feet automatically carried her forward, she sent a fearful look at Remus, one that one only wears in the most despairing of circumstances. Remus, don't let me go...don't let me go to my death.

Oh, shut up, she told herself. They aren't going to stone you up there, though maybe the Slytherins might -

No! Positive thinking, remember? Right, now think positive -

She reached the stool. She willed herself to just plop the hat on and get it over with - the hanging silence, the dirty looks - but she couldn't respond. Her mind was reduced to nothing, a blank slate, and Lily found herself pivoting slowly to face the potential hostile student body of Hogwarts. Remus was mouthing, "Sit down! Sit down!" but she was not looking for him. This is it, she thought. This is what I've damned myself into doing: standing in front all these people who might as well be holding torches and pitchforks and making a complete idiot at myself all the while being teased. But it isn't teasing. It's something so much deeper, so much worse, and it hurts. She found her vision wandering over to Helen, the latest victim of this merciless mob, who was sitting at the Ravenclaw table being shunned by her fellow Housemates, all stony faced. She panned across the Great Hall, soaking in its magnificence, basking in its warmth, and closed her eyes. Her body surrendered to its allure, its beckoning for her to join in, to join Hogwarts.

Then she opened her eyes, her lids rising after what seemed like an interminably long nap.

The first person she noticed was the silver-haired Slytherin. He was watching Lily with an amused expression but one full of impudence all the same. Tempted to slap him, she had to settle with merely glaring back. He spoke.

"Dear Lord," he said loudly so that everyone in the Hall could hear him, "not another Mudblood? Goodness, these people just don't know what to do, do they?"

All four tables were consumed with laughter, and in dismay Lily swung her head around and looked at the professor's tables. To her revulsion, many of them, too, were quickly trying to smother their mirth. There was only one sitting there that kept his face impassive. She didn't know him, and he didn't know her (save for her name, which included her cursed last name), but there was something about his partly regal demeanor (and long silver beard) that assured Lily he did not sympathize but gently pushed her to do what she had to do and to complete it with an aura of elegance. It struck her: he's the headmaster. He's the one who let me in and let me be mocked not just in front of everyone but by everyone.

She found that she could harbor no resentment for him though. Tell me what to do, she implore silently.

He looked back at her, his eyes twinkling.

Cautiously, she placed the Sorting Hat on her head and sat down, blessed not to be able to be seen by the crowd.

Ah, finally, it spoke to her. I was beginning to wonder if that was the end of everyone. What a terribly small class that will be! I thought.

Should I talk back to it? Lily thought.

Oh, be free to do so! I'm here to divulge in all of your inner secrets and personality traits, even those you didn't know you had.

Umm...

Don't worry at all! It's no work on your behalf. I'm the thinking cap, remember? So, let's see, another Muggle-born, eh? Hmm, we seem to be having a lot of those this year.

Two? Two is a lot?

We usually don't have any! But, anyway, that's digressing. Well, this is going to be a tough decision. There's definitely that drive to prove yourself, but not in the accepted way.

"Accepted" way? What's what supposed to mean?

Oh, just the way most people would.

I want to prove myself?

Yes! Why, it's so outstanding on your list of credentials I can't believe I didn't see it the moment you put me on! Very smart and intelligent, no doubt, yes, that will take you far if you use it correctly. Ravenclaw? I shouldn't think so. Personally, I never liked Rowena much -

Wait, you mean Rowena Ravenclaw? The witch who founded the House of Ravenclaw?

Bravo! You're even smarter than what I had first expected!

You knew Rowena Ravenclaw? But...she was one of the Founders of Hogwarts. There's no way you could have known her...unless...unless...

I was there when she was alive?

My God!

There, now, everyone knows I'm Godric Gryffindor. Well, not physically, but still.

Huh, I certainly did not -

Enough! Sorry, dear girl, to cut you off, but there are people waiting for you to be done. Albus -

Who's that?

Gracious, do these questions never stop coming? Anyway, I am sure he would love what I'm going to do with you, and it would undoubtedly be a credit for me as well. Perhaps not in the short term...but -

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Swiping the Sorting Hat off of her, she sprinted to the Gryffindor Table and sat next down next to Sirius, her breaths coming in heaves. Now that it was over, she was entirely indifferent to the fact she was getting hisses instead of cheers, shifty glances instead of approving eyes.

"That took forever," Sirius said under his breath as the next unfortunate students took the stage.

"Did it?" Lily trilled in a high voice, still recuperating from the conversation she had with the Sorting Hat - or, more appropriately, Godric Gryffindor.

"Most people get their Sortings done in less than thirty seconds. Yours took at least two minutes. Must be a school record or something," he said casually, but the dark glint in his eyes betrayed him; clearly, the two of them were still avoiding each other slightly.

She couldn't find a reply for that (though it was tempting to begin a sparring of words) nor did she have the concentration to do so. Her thoughts were still dwelled upon her Sorting.

"There's definitely that drive to prove yourself..." "Very smart and intelligent...that will take you far if you use it correctly..." All of the enigmatic phrases the Sorting Hat had spoken left Lily in a terrible quandary. Half of what it (he?) had said registered as meaningless and had frightened as well as confused her. Firstly, could a hat - albeit one with wizard's spirit inhabiting it - really read so much of her inner self, more than what she knew of? Then, of course, there was what was actually said. She supposed, though, that as the year wore on she would learn what the Sorting Hat's almost prophetic words meant.

So deep she was in her thoughts that Lily didn't see Remus crash down beside her, his face shining and showing the most expression she had ever seen it show.

"Oh - your Sorting!" Lily moaned. "I forgot! I wasn't watching. Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, Remus, I'm really really sorry."

"Understandable," he said breathlessly. "After how long yours took, it's no wonder...but anyway, my parents are going to be so surprised! Gryffindor! Of all the Houses, I thought, and they thought, I had the smallest chance of getting into this one, and look at where I am. Gryffindor! That's mad!"

"That's great! I'm really happy for you."

"I still can't believe it. I want to say the Sorting was somehow rigged, but I couldn't. The Sorting Hat is always right. Always."

So, Lily thought, it will be right about me as well?

"And James?" she asked. "Has he collapsed of anxiety yet?"

"Of course not," he replied delicately. "If anything, he would jump up on stage and grab the Sorting Hat and put it on his own head. Professor McGonagall keeps on sending him looks, though. Don't think she's too pleased with him. He still has to see her afterwards, right?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Well, I feel bad for him." Remus's voice dropped to a lower register. "I've heard she isn't all that lenient with misbehaving first years. Imagine if he was sorted into Gryffindor. Professor McGonagall's the head of our House!"

Lily giggled. "Imagine that..."

"He's going to be in Gryffindor, alright," Sirius interrupted smoothly as if he had been conversing with them all along. "It's in his blood."

"Yeah?" Remus retorted, unusually stinging. "What about yours?"

The color drained out of Sirius's face, his eyes glittering ferociously.

"What did you say, half-blood?"

"Guys," Lily complained, "could you be quiet? I want to watch the Sorting now." Hah, she thought, like I really want to. For her, watching the first years go through the Sorting was like reliving the ordeal again...and again...and again, a succession of never-ending bouts of nausea and headache. She had only said that to break up the brewing rancor between Remus and Sirius, though God knows how that even began. "It always seems that whenever the word 'blood' is brought up, so is some kind of argument," she mused softly to herself.

"Hmm? What did you say?"

"Nothing, Remus," she stated a little too loud. "I was just wondering, you know, when the feast will begin. I'm bloody starving."

"So is everyone else," he groaned, grasping his stomach.

Feeling as if she was going to pass out due to hunger, Lily kept her attention on the Sorting long enough to see James hop down to the Gryffindor table, his face victorious. Curious, she watched on as Sirius congratulated him. His smile and praise were genuine, there was no doubt about that, but she somehow sensed that there was something stirring within Sirius, something that wanted to give James a good kick in the -

"Snape, Severus!" Professor McGonagall said. "After this, the feast will begin."

Shoulders hunched slightly forward, Severus shuffled his way to the Sorting Hat, and a mere moment later, he was on his way to the Slytherin table. Lily felt a looming tension break. The food was coming.

It was all over. There was no more to fear.

"Oh, no," she griped, staring on in annoyance as the headmaster stood up, lightly clanging his fork against the side of his goblet for silence. "I want to eat!"

"Students, faculty members," he began, his face warm, "welcome to yet another year at Hogwarts. New additions - our first years - " His spectacles turned to Lily " - may you have a wonderful stay this year and for the next six years to come. For those who do not know me, my name is Albus Dumbledore - "

"Albus!" Lily murmured, sinking back into the myriad of thoughts occupying her mind.

" - and if I had had the choice, I would continue to bore you to insanity with my speech...but not to worry. I shall honor all of your stomachs' wishes. Let the feast begin!"

And just like magic, mounds upon mounds of food appeared from literally nowhere, heaping themselves upon the tables' surfaces. Lily could almost hear the tables groan with the weight. Food, she thought, savoring the imaginary taste of roasted chicken in her mouth and the sizzling juices swimming down her throat, and begin piling random helpings onto her plate.

"Mm, dis i' blurry good," she managed to say through a mouthful of mashed potatoes.

"Lily," James preached solemnly, evoking much laughter from Sirius, "didn't you mother ever teach you not to speak when your mouth is full?"

"Of course not," a fellow student huffed. "She's a Mudblood, and they don't have anything called manners."

Her blood chilled, the light of the night dimmed, and the mashed potatoes suddenly tasted so revolting she wanted to choke it back out. No, she urged herself. Don't let that sort of person ruin it for you. Just because one Gryffindor thinks like that doesn't mean the others will.

"It seems they've found a new nickname for me already," she said coolly.

"And, trust me, it'll stick," Remus replied sympathetically.

"Oh, that does it!" she spat, throwing down her fork and standing up (though being so short and the hall so loud, no one noticed). "What's wrong with being of Mug - "

Sirius threw a restraining arm around her shoulders and threateningly pushed her back into her seat.

"Shut up!" he shushed. "We don't need the whole freaking school knowing that you're..." Remus sent him a subtle but reproachful look, and Sirius meekly continued at a much lower volume "...that you're not like us."

"Why would that be?"

Sirius and Remus exchanged glances?

"Hey, would you look at that?" James exclaimed, pointing his finger at the wall he was sitting opposite to. "Ghosts!"

Half of Lily wanted to shake him by his shoulders and scream into his face, "THERE - IS - NO - SUCH - THING - AS - GHOSTS!" but now that she was actually in Hogwarts and her Muggle rationality was being infiltrated by that of the Wizarding world, her doubt was ephemeral and just that. The pearly and translucent specters glided down to the tables, waving their wispy hands at students they were already acquainted with. A particularly fat-looking one was whispering something into the ear of another, vainly trying to make him change his brooding expression. One landed on the Gryffindor's plate of smoked salmon but, unsurprisingly, left no imprint on the food.

"So, have we our new batch of first years?" he said, his smile bright. "Ah, there you are. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Sir Nicholas - "

"Nearly Headless Nick?" James butted in. "I know you, well, I've heard of you. My dad talks about you all the time, but he just calls you Nick."

"Your dad?"

"He was in Gryffindor. And Head Boy, Prefect, Quidditch Captain, everything someone would want to be," he continued, though sounding somewhat spiteful.

"Yes, that would be a lot to live up to, wouldn't it?" Nick chortled. "Good luck with that...wait. You aren't Roman Potter's son, are you?"

"That would be me," James groaned, extending a hand. "He always told me never to shake hands with a ghost, but I fear that wouldn't be polite. The name's James Potter."

"James is a good name," Nick remarked. "Very strong, very good. Your old man'll have to come back to Hogwarts if he'll not be outdone by his son." Sulking, Lily saw him glower with pride. "Now, enough with formalities. Have you tried this pastry yet? It's simply marvelous, though - of course - I haven't eaten in hundreds of years. What a pity; I can almost taste it."

"Suck up," Sirius said flatly as Nick floated away, "using family connections like that."

"And what about you?" James swiftly replied, reaching for the pasty Nick had recommended.

"Well, clearly it didn't work with the Sorting Hat, did it?" Sirius chuckled.

"Apparently not! And I would have been pretty ticked if it did."

Lily, on the other hand, was growing increasingly drowsy. Excessive amounts of food often have such an enchanting effect on people's minds, a bit like alcohol except the sensation is much more filling. When Nick sat down next to her, however, her dreams of sleep instantly evaporated. She smiled at him, but his face was clouded and dark.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"You wouldn't happen to be Evans, would you?"

"Yes, that's me. Lily Evans."

She offered him a hand but he didn't take it. On the contrary, he seemed to shrink away from her, but maybe that was just her imagination. Actually, now that she thought about it, everyone but Remus was giving her a wide berth. Even James and Sirius were acting as if they could not see her.

"Would you like to know," he started, obviously sounding quite pained, "how things are going to work, since, er, you're not that familiar with it all?"

"That would help very much," she tried to answer in her sweetest voice.

I ought to ask James how he brown-noses so well, she thought, disgruntled.

"Okay, then. We've got the four Houses: Gryffindor - oh, by the way, I am your House ghost - Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin. The students aren't just categorized that way based on your personality, but this system is also in place to breed a little friendly competition, though in the past few years, it hasn't been exactly 'friendly.' Still, it's not so violent," he hastily added upon seeing Lily's mortified expression. "Er, right. Whenever a student does something particularly commendable, a professor will award his or her house points. Conversely, if a student does something that he or she shouldn't have done, then a professor will take off points. At the end of the year, the House with the most points is awarded with a trophy. It's a big honor to win. Gryffindor lost to Slytherin last year; hopefully we'll redeem ourselves this time around!"

She nodded in understanding, and Nick went off to chat with a nearby prefect. Mournfully, she watched his transparent form as it floated away, feeling the hollowness return. She had certainly eaten her portion of the food, and now her head ached for the support of a fluffy down pillow beneath it. Since such a thing wasn't present, a table would have to suffice...

The boundless sky stretched out around her, the sun bathing her in warmth, the breeze running across her skin. Never had she seen such a glorious day. There was not a cloud obscuring the light, but then the warmth was stolen from her and the chill leaped upon her, strangling her in its grasp. She wrenched her eyes open: a menacing shape was slowly moving toward her, and she tried to flee before it could get her. As it neared, she noticed a distinct rip on its side - the Sorting Hat. It landed over her, and she could see nothing, nothing but a black as boundless as the sky had once been.

"Wake up!"

Her arms groped about in the darkness, trying to hold onto something for support, but there was nothing...

A sharp jab awakened her.

"Finally! First years..." Struggling to her feet, she followed the prefect who had awoken her out of the emptying Great Hall. "Okay, all of your Housemates are a little farther on since they didn't fall asleep at the table. Turn left two corridors down and then go up one floor. Go and join them. I'm supposed to stand here and make sure no one like you gets lost."

Still too tired to disagree, Lily stumbled dazedly in the direction the prefect had pointed out. Hmm, two corridors down? she thought. Here's one, two -

She had hardly turned her heel when she was roughly pushed against the stone wall, her head nearly splitting in two. Her sleepiness disappeared, and all she could feel was fear, cold and impenetrable fear, pervading her entire body as she stood, shock still, looking into an unforgiving face. Discretely, her eyes roamed over him, his tall form, flowing robes, and hard-set gray eyes. And the silver hair, a blond so light it was almost no blond at all.

Then Lily knew him. He was the Slytherin that momentarily captivated her attention, and here he was, towering over her. If it was at all possible, she shrank even more against the wall.

"So," he drawled carelessly, "Lily...Evans. What an interesting name." She willed herself to remain silent. "Are you finding Hogwarts to your liking?" Thoroughly confused, she wasn't sure if that was a rhetorical question. He seemed to expect a quick answer from her, but under his stare, she could do no more than keep her jaw clenched tightly, her eyes fixed on his. "Oh, not good enough for your Mudblood tastes, I suppose."

In an instant, her pride rose up and spoke for her. "It's good enough!"

A throbbing pain shot across her cheek and she tumbled to the floor. Tears formed in her eyes, but she quickly wiped them away before he could see and further ridicule her. Paralyzed, she couldn't tear her eyes away from him as he slowly, threateningly approached her, a wand pointed straight at her. And she knew it. She knew what was going to happen.

He's going to kill me, Lily thought, her head spinning, and I'm going to die right here, right now, in the middle of a hallway in a school I've only been in for a few hours. He's going to bloody kill me!

But he only stood there. His glare was riveting. Slowly, he bent down, placing the tip of the wand near the base of her neck.

"What a beautiful girl you are," he said, half teasingly. "It would be a shame to kill someone...like you." He raised a hand and ran it through her hair, twisting its strands around his sure and steady fingers. Stop it, stop it! she screamed silently. Don't touch me! In all of the books she had ever read that involved romance, this was something to be enjoyed, to feel a man's touch, but Lily could not enjoy it. His stroking was utterly revolting, spreading poison through her. She insolently turned her head away, knowing how dearly she would pay for not being his whore. Almost reluctantly, he pulled back, but his face was still fixed in lines of amusement. He broke out in harsh laughter, his loose hair swaying. "Oh, God, you think I'm going to shag you in the middle of the school?" he asked. "A little full of yourself, aren't you?" Brusquely pulling her to her feet, his vice-like grasp cutting into her skin, she let out a moan of pain.

"Yes, you are beautiful, I'll give you that, but your looks are only a deception. Under your pretty self you're worthless, worthless and a shame to us all." His voice dropped to a dangerous whisper. "I'm warning you, Mudblood. We'll be watching, all of us. I don't know how you managed to worm your way here, but we'll make sure you'll go no further."

Storing his wand within his robes, he released her and strode away. He didn't go more than two steps before he pivoted, looking back at her. It was then Lily realized the full extent of his intimidating presence. Every part of him was impeccably built as if each part of him had first been carefully examined before being put together to create him. Closing her eyes, she could still sense him, standing nearby.

"My name is Lucius Malfoy," he said at last. "You'll remember that, won't you?"