Sanguis Novus

Chapter Two: Broken Window

Lily tried to continue plowing through her book, but the image of Petunia relaying what she had seen - the owl, the book, her weirdness in general - to her parents remained burned in her mind. What would they say? She knew her parents were, when compared to their oldest daughter, very open-minded, but she innately knew that telling them when they came home, "Oh, mum, I'm a witch and I'll be going off to a school for weird people like me, is that okay?" just wouldn't seem...right, regardless of however tolerant they were.

The door slammed downstairs and voices filtered up to Lily, filling her with unusual dread. She was, under normal circumstances, the first one downstairs to greet them, a daughter genuinely pleased to see her parents. Today, however, the opening of the front door only brought further strain on her already-strained nerves. John and Prudence Evans both worked as teachers at the elementary school their children had passed through, which was possibly the main cause for Lily's lack of friends. Petunia, though deemed inferior in appearance and brains, was an invaluable tool for the school society elite due to her uncanny memory of gossip. People, however, thought Lily only managed good grades because of her parents' influences, and they thoroughly despised those kinds of students.

"That boy, I can't stand him!" Mrs. Evans complained, throwing what seemed like a thick stack of papers on the countertop.

"Look, Prudence, just calm down. He can be transferred to another class, I assure you that's possible. I've done it before - "

Lily chuckled; her mum was always griping about one student or another in a somewhat hysteric fashion, and on days when her mother was semi-quiet, Lily felt something was amiss. Her dad was the rational person in the family, the levelheaded one, usually dealing with the most troubling conflicts and attempting to pacify her mum. Guess they were made just right for each other, she thought. Well, I'd better tell them what happened before Petunia gets to twist the story into some huge tale about me keeping a dragon as a pet -

As she raised herself onto her feet, prepared for the worst, a thumping sound on the stairs sent her into shock. No! Petunia's going to get there first, and that just can't happen!

"Get out of the way!" Lily snarled, charging into her sister and sending them both tumbling down the stairs, landing in a heap in front of their parents.

"What are you doing, you moron?" Petunia screamed back at nearly the same volume. "Trying to kill me?" Rolling her eyes in perfect disdain, she rearranged her disheveled hair and faced Mrs. Evans with an impeccably angelic smile. "Mum, Lily would like to tell you something."

She sent a nasty look in her sister's way, but Lily tried to remain as unflappable as was possible with an aching elbow.

"I, um, I got this letter today. I'll go get it if you'd like."

"No, just explain," sighed Mrs. Evans, running her hand through her hair. "Sorry, dear, but I'm quite tired today."

"Well, I won't be able to go to secondary school anymore," she said, feeling defensive. "I'm...I'm going to another school. I've been accepted already, see, that's what the letter's about. I've been accepted to - " She took a deep breath, bracing for the reaction " - Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry," she quickly recited, as if she could slip those words past her parents.

Never had the ticking of the grandfather clock in the foyer seemed so deafening or the birds' twittering so ear splitting as Lily waited for her mum to lash out, "I never should have had you! You were a mistake, you freak!" or her Petunia, towering over her, a satisfied grin growing on her gaunt face, for something...

But Mrs. Evans' face showed only a slight surprise and joy, mixed in with...apprehension? No, wrong word. What was it? Certainly it was something Lily had never seen on her mother's face, almost a fear, a foreboding, but defiance as well, full of the fiery passion that had been passed from mother to daughter.

"Why, that's wonderful," Mrs. Evans remarked in the fashion of one discussing the weather, but that strange look stayed upon her face.

No, this isn't right, Lily thought. She's treating this like she was...like she already knew this was going to happen. And Dad - he looks just like Mum. This isn't right! Well, I wasn't really expecting anything, come to think of it, but I thought she would look surprised or angry - I almost want her to look angry - but not like this! Oh, definitely not like this!

"So, do you want me to get the letter?" Lily repeated, praying to be given a moment to sort this all out.

"We'd like to read it, yes," Mr. Evans said.

It took more than a few minutes to deliver the letter. Upon reaching the safe parameters of her room, Lily threw herself onto her unmade bed, pounding the pillow and the bedcovers, confused at her own behavior. There was nothing to be upset over. Her parents had taken the matter very well indeed, better than what she had been hoping, and even Petunia had limited her scorn...then why this sudden change in demeanor? But no, mood swing or not, she had to get a hold of herself and present the letter with a straight face.

Her parents took a liberal amount of time consuming it, and Lily swore they must have been trying to find the etymological history to each word. She began tapping her foot absentmindedly, and it was that sound that seemed to have knocked them out of their reverie. Petunia was standing by, looking equally bored and thinking that her parents should be working themselves into a pleasurable rage at her sister instead of pouring over that stupid letter.

"So?" Lily asked impatiently, unable to restrain her temper and devouring curiosity.

"Could we talk to you over in the living room?" Mrs. Evans asked, her face pale but set. "And, Petunia, could you take your lovely self elsewhere, preferably back upstairs in your room?"

Very put out, Petunia trudged up the stairs, still rubbing her throbbing arm. Missing out on more gossip about your freak sister really sucks, Lily thought nastily. She did as she was told and followed her parents into the familiar living room. As the name implied, it was there the Evans spent most of their time as a family, sharing amusing anecdotes from the past day. But to Lily, the room seemed rigid and distant, shunning her away from what was once full of warmth and ease. No, she cried out silently, not you too! I don't want to be a stranger anymore, not in my own home! She shrank into the sagging couch and waited.

"Before we begin," Mr. Evans said in a business-like fashion after cautiously closing the door, "I just want you to remember this: We are going to let you go to Hogwarts, if that's what you want."

"But," Mrs. Evans continued, "there are some things you need to be aware of. Just listen, okay?" Her face contorted with pain and torment as she reached for her daughter's hand, smoothing it tenderly. "I've noticed that, well, you haven't exactly been accepted at school. I don't want to make you feel bad, but I need to make that point clear. And Petunia? I know it always seemed we treated your little fights as a joke...in that sibling rivalry sort of sense, but I'm scared that maybe they've had more of an impact on you than we would've liked."

"Little fights"? Mum, Lily thought sadly, cringing as she thought of her past, you have no idea. You've never seen the water guns she and her friends bought with the allowance you gave her, the ones that they used on me. It was years ago. I can't even remember clearly, but you weren't there, Dad wasn't there, and they pushed me against the wall outside in the garden. They soaked me until I was sopping wet, and it didn't hurt, really. Just humiliated me completely. They told me not to tell anyone or more would come. I was scared...of them, of Petunia, and of you. I didn't know what you would say. I never told you. I never told you about people throwing little stones at me during break or taking my books, making me chase them to get them back. I never told you. I guess this is what they mean by "ignorance is bliss," huh, Mum?

Lily kept her face impassive as such thoughts scrolled through her mind.

"And you've never really told us everything that has been going on. I knew that having children would be like living with a secret. It's right there in front of you, but you'll never know it. With Petunia, it usually wasn't that way. She probably told me more than I would've liked, but with you, you never talked all that much as a child. When you were young, I can remember you would just sit there, without a word, staring out the window.

"We also think that you might find it easier to fit in at a place like Hogwarts. Lily, you're a brilliant child, and - " Mrs. Evans paused, her eyes welling up with newly formed tears. "Well, you're too good for this family and for this world. You were made for something better than this...and your dad and I are ready to do anything for you."

Oh, it's this speech again, the whole I'd-be-willing-to-do-absolutely-bloody-anything-because-we're-pretending-to-love-you-more lecture, Lily thought, disgruntled and yearning to throw something at her parents. Yet in spite of this, she felt some of the glumness that had settled over her shoulders like a heavy shroud lift, if only just a tad. Her mum was treating her with the maturity that was usually reserved for the more poised Petunia, and the seriousness, as much as it was intimidating, gave Lily a rare sense of worth.

"However," Mr. Evans broke in, "there is something you need to remember. Hogwarts might seem like some sort of paradise to you, but there will always be people who won't like you for some reason, okay? Just keep that in mind."

She nodded, not revealing her confusion. That's something I never thought my parents would remind me of, Lily thought. But I guess they're right. I'll have to keep my expectations low then.

"Um, okay," she said, feeling very uncomfortable. "So, um, d'you want to mail the letter out?"

"Sure," Mrs. Evans said, shattering the tense atmosphere, "but one more thing." Lily froze. No more lecturing! "What exactly do they mean by they're awaiting 'your owl'? Have you got an owl?"

"Yeah. She was the one who dropped the letter off, and she didn't leave, so I guess she's mine. I named her Regina. You wouldn't mind if I kept her as a pet, would you?"

"That's fine, but you didn't answer the first question. Why are they awaiting this Regina?" Mr. Evans repeated.

She thought she had read something in the guide on owls. I think they're used for sending mail, she remembered.

"They want me to send her to Hogwarts to tell them I'm coming. You know, like an R.S.V.P.? I don't know. I'll, er, go get her then."

Lily strode over to the door, her tiny frame shaking with unspoken relief. That's it, then. I'm going to Hogwarts! Sporting a grin, she yanked the door open, only to be knocked back into the living room by a heavy...well, she didn't know what it was. Her thoughts abruptly switched to the dream, the vision of falling from an infinite height...

"What are you doing here, Petunia?" Mrs. Evans scolded.

"Getting my book," she mumbled, blushing a furious crimson.

"The only book in this room is Lily's French Revolution book," Mrs. Evans said, her tone flat but bubbling with anger. "I didn't know you were interested in it."

"How long were you standing there?" Mr. Evans yelled.

"I wasn't eavesdropping, I swear!"

"Yes, you were - "

"I WAS NOT, DAMMIT!"

"Petunia!" Mrs. Evans screamed, her words cracking through the air and demanding silence. "I will not tolerate that sort of language in this household, understand?"

"But Mum," she whined, "I wasn't!"

As the screaming grew louder, Lily smirked in evil delight. She knew it was wrong to be feeling so satisfied, especially with her sister finally getting what she deserved (a nice long shouting session), but victory had never tasted so sweet. She couldn't help it...she had to say something...

"You know you're just jealous," she hissed superciliously.

A threatening quiet fell over the family, a sudden contrast with the calamity that had been occurring only moments before, but for only a second, Lily thought the din was entirely preferable to a strained and breaking peace.

"Jealous, am I?" Petunia mocked. "Why should I be jealous of someone like you? I know you're being sent to some freak school so you can feel like you're all perfect and that everyone loves you. But you know what? No one loves you. No one could ever love something like you, you spoiled brat. That's all you'll ever be, this stupid little girl who thinks everyone's just dying to meet and know you - "

"That's quite enough!" Mr. Evans scoffed. "Your mum and I didn't raise you to act this way to your sister!"

"No, Dad, it's okay," Lily said softly. "Just let her say whatever she wants to." Her piercing green eyes landed on Petunia's face, on the face of a sister she had tried to desperately to love and to think of as an idol. But the illusion of a warm and caring sibling melted away, and she was only looking at the startling complexion of an utter stranger, a stranger with whom she had lived her entire life under the same roof but never knew, never knew. Her sister's pale face tightened, but she said not a word. Speak, Lily commanded wordlessly. What insults do you have for me today? Still, nothing had escaped Petunia's talkative mouth.

Lily allowed her eyes to bore further into those of her sister's. Come on, if you really think you're that great, you'll look back and stare at me, just as I'm staring at you. But Petunia's head dropped, her eyes darting away. Seeing her intent accomplished, she turned to her parents, steel-eyed. "I'll be right back," she spoke clearly, and then dashed out of the room.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU BITCH!" Petunia screeched, chasing and clawing at her sister.

Lily scurried away, her eyes shut in fear, feeling that momentary triumph evaporate, knowing she would pay dearly for that minute of superiority. She hoped her legs would somehow acquire a few inches so she could outrun her taller, leaner sister. To Regina, she thought hysterically. Just get to Regina and then she will save you. She saved you from this world, so she can save you from Petunia. She flew into her room, ruffling the nearby curtains. She knew with instinct not to waste any time with the door because her sister could easily force it open, especially when charged as she was then.

"Regina, save me," she sobbed, throwing her body over the cage.

You can kill me, Petunia. Go ahead. Try it. Murder's fun, isn't it? Kill me, but you aren't going to without my owl beside me. Come on, you know you want to. You know that this is all you've wanted your whole worthless life: to see your sister's blood all over your hands. Come on, then.

"I'LL KILL YOU AND YOUR BLOODY OWL!" she shrieked as she launched herself at her cowering sister.

But Lily looked at her, eyes swimming and brimming with unshed tears, the two green pinpricks of pure and virginal innocence. Her face was composed; it reflected no fear, only a horrible resolve and determination. We will die together, Regina, and we will fly away together -

"WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME?" Petunia screeched, unexpectedly halting and looking sickened.

Lily looked on in amazement. Her sister had somehow grown wings...just like...just like that person in her dreams...but there was a beak too. She looked to Regina, startled, but the owl looked like she was enjoying herself greatly. Turning back to her sister, Lily could hardly tell Petunia was a human. Except for the fact the owl-human was maybe twelve times larger than Regina, she thought Petunia could've passed for a pretty decent bird.

Lily, she berated herself, don't have those thoughts! She tried to keep a straight face, but the mischief in her was surfacing...oh, why did common sense have to flee now? Her gaze settled on the descending sun, the subtle hues of the evening and twilight, so tranquil, so inspiring. And what a horrible shame it was that it would soon be ruined.

She whipped her head around, glaring at Petunia. Every fiber of her being was focused on one thought: Out the window, you. Come on, fly out the window...

Lily shut her eyes as she heard the window shatter in a crystalline explosion, shreds of glass littering the floor, and an accompanying, "AHH!" After hearing a sort of muffled clump and a shocking stream of curses she didn't even know existed, Lily felt very bad indeed for her mother's garden but spared no sympathy for her sister.

Alarmed at the crash, Mr. and Mrs. Evans trundled up the steps and burst into Lily's room. Before they could say a word, their daughter was on her feet.

"Mum, there was a little - " Lily paused. What could she call it? Certainly it wasn't her fault Petunia had been rendered into a bird, and although she had willed for her sister to be thrown out the window, she never physically picked Petunia up and tossed her outside " - accident," she finished firmly. "She sort of fell out there." Lily vaguely gestured to where the window once was.

"Petunia?" her mum yelled, sticking her head out of the window.

"SHE PUSHED ME OUT OF THE WINDOW - "

"I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!" Lily screamed back, but her dad beckoned her to stay silent.

"Prudence?" Mr. Evans said. "I'll go and take care of Petunia. You and Lily sort out whatever needs to be done, okay?"

As he hurried back down the stairs to answer Petunia's wailing, Mrs. Evans faced Lily and gestured to the owl.

"So, this is Regina?"

"Yeah."

Lily reached for a sheet of paper on her desk and began to compose a letter to Hogwarts.

To whom it may concern,

My name is Lily Evans and I have received your letter about Hogwarts. The owl that delivered it didn't want to leave my house, so is it okay if I keep her? And, yes, I can go to Hogwarts since that's what the letter's about.

Lily

After hearing her mum say it was okay, she placed it in an envelope and sealed it. However, it felt more like she was sealing herself off from the Muggle world.

"Regina," she commanded, "I'll need you to take this to Hogwarts for me, okay? You do know the way there, right?"

The owl hooted brightly and took flight, stretching her wings luxuriously (though the right wing didn't seem capable of being extended all the way) and dashing off into the sky. Come back soon! Lily thought.

Meanwhile, Petunia was still in the bush, shrieking in agony as her dad, without luck, tried to calm her.