Oscillate Wildly

"...Afternoons when we sat in your room, they meant more to me than any living thing on Earth. They had more worth than any living thing on Earth."
- The Smiths

"Oh, God."

Harry was in such a state of shock he nearly didn't realise those words had escaped from his own lips. His mum and dad looked just as he remembered from the Mirror of Erised, only older. Lily still possessed her dark red hair, but a few wisps of grey were evident and worry lines surrounded her eyes. Looking at James was like looking into a mirror and only James's age and a differently shaped eye and nose separated the two. His hair stuck up in all directions and he nervously tried flattening it with his hand as he gazed at his son.

His mother tentatively approached Harry and said in a formal tone, "I'm very pleased to see you again, Harry. Do you know who I am?" Harry could only manage a mute nod, his mouth hanging slightly open.

James came over to the two of them and placed a protective arm around his wife. Lily leaned heavily on him. Eyes filled with tears, he managed to whisper, "Welcome back, Harry. We've missed you very much." Harry tried blinking back tears himself and was unsuccessful. It was quite a lot for him to comprehend, but the elation he was feeling easily defeated any lingering confusion.

Harry understood that this was the first time he'd heard his parents speaking to him. To him. Not while screaming in terror, not while begging for mercy, and not from a greasy git's Pensieve. His parents were with him. He had parents. Harry no longer knew what he wanted, but he knew that right now, he didn't want to leave this place.

Dr. Mason smiled and told the reunited family that he was just going to get coffee and would be right back. None of them paid him any mind. Finally, after a moment, Lily completely engulfed Harry in a hug, despite the fact that he was already taller than she was. Her tears now flowed freely and she sobbed into Harry's shoulder.

James led his wife and son to the couch. His parents flanked Harry's sides, holding hands over his shoulders. James smiled, making his eyes crinkle. "Well," he said with a bit of laughter in his voice, "we have a bit of catching up to do, don't we?"

"Oh, yes," said Harry. "I... I really can't believe this is happening. This is too much. It's unbelievable." Harry heard Dumbledore's voice warning him that Voldemort would shape his reality to fit Harry's desires. Angrily, he squashed the old man's memory from his head and turned to Lily. "Tell me whatever you want to tell me."

Lily looked thoughtful and asked, "Do you remember us at all? We...well, we know that we're...not there...in your world. Dr. Mason has a theory about that, but...."

Harry shook his head and regretfully replied, "I don't remember you at all. Where I'm from, you d-died from a curse when I was only a year old. It's how I got this." He pointed to his forehead.

James face twisted with anger. "That was no curse. Well, not unless you consider Dudley Dursley to be a curse. And considering what that...brat...." James trailed off, glancing at his wife. He obviously wanted to use more colourful language, but held himself back. James continued, "Considering what that brat did to you, I certainly do. He nearly killed my son. That's not something you can forgive."

Shocked, Harry's eyebrows flew upwards. "Wait. Dudley did this? That's how I ended up here? Because of Dudley?"

Lily nodded sadly. "It was supposed to be such a perfect day. I'd invited your school friends over for a birthday party. Oh, you were so adorable, running around with them, smiling and laughing. But then, you were always popular."

"You get that from me," James interjected.

Rolling her eyes, Lily continued, "I invited Dudley out of obligation. Petunia" - At the name, James pulled another face – "begged me to invite him. I did it because he's part of our family."

Interrupting again, James declared, "That boy is no family of mine!"

Lily sighed and Harry knew this was an old argument between his parents. "When Dudley saw all the attention you were getting, he grew very angry. After opening your presents, Dudley called you over to him. The rest happened so fast, I couldn't stop it."

Soothingly, James told her, "Shh. It wasn't your fault."

"He'd always been bigger than you," she continued.

"Fatter," James said matter-of-factly. Harry smiled wanly.

"He attacked you and you tried to run away, but he threw his whole weight into you. You slammed into the door to your bedroom. The doorknob, to be exact. Dr. Mason told you that already, right?" Harry nodded.

James, his face ashen, said, "I ran over to you as soon as I saw what was happening. When I got there, you were already unconscious and your head was covered in blood. You were brought here and you...you were in a coma." James and Lily looked at each other, overcome with emotion, as Harry angrily rubbed at his scar.

Dr. Mason returned then and handed cups of coffee to Harry's parents. When he returned to his desk, he faced the trio on the sofa and eyed them carefully. Dr. Mason said, "I expect your parents have told you the circumstances of your stay?"

Finally managing to find his voice, Harry said, "Yes. They told me it was all Dudley's fault. Nice to know he's an arsehole here, too." Lily gasped softly, but his father just chuckled.

"Language, Harry," said Dr. Mason, but he was smiling a bit, too. The doctor rubbed his tired eyes. "Have they told you anything about what's happened since you've arrived here?" Harry shook his head.

Dr. Mason nodded and said, "As I told you before, you were in a coma for a year before waking up."

"We were all so excited when you woke up," Lily said. Harry was awash with guilt.

"You woke up just before your eleventh birthday, but you weren't the same. You didn't recognise your parents or any of your other friends or relatives. When you were asked a direct question, you would never answer, preferring to talk about Hogwarts," said Dr. Mason. "However, when we would ask about your parents, you would hide under your bed, curled into a little ball."

Curious, Harry asked, "Why would I do that?"

Dr. Mason sighed and said, "When you climbed under your bed, you would tell us your parents were dead. For a month or so, you said they'd died in a car crash. Later, you would tell us they died because of the Abracadabra curse."

"Avada Kedavra," Harry corrected automatically.

"Ah," replied Dr. Mason, quickly jotting down notes on a pad of paper. "That's not Latin, is it?" Harry shrugged. "Interesting. Most of your phrases are in Latin. Which brings us to an fascinating tangent, at least from an academic viewpoint. How could an eleven-year-old boy know so much Latin to come up with syntactically correct spells? On the other hand, how many eleven-year-olds could create and maintain an imaginary universe for five solid years?"

Harry shrugged again, but wondered what that meant. He certainly didn't have a vast Latin background that he knew about and filed away that little bit of information to think about later.

Dr. Mason continued the story. "As I said, you hid under your bed for a good deal of the time. You were often heard muttering about your cupboard, you told us spiders were all over you. When we would try to pull you out, you'd scream because you thought you'd be in trouble. Harry, you would insist that Vernon Dursley put you in your ‘cupboard' and that you would be punished again if you came out.

"The morning after your birthday, we found you sitting on top of your bed instead of under it, for once. We were happy, but you weren't. You kept telling us you just wanted your letters. In fact, you insisted you had to get your letters and tried sneaking out of the boys' ward several times. Hogwarts started coming up in the conversation not long after." The doctor spread open his hands to indicate everything he'd just said was up for discussion.

In nearly a whisper, Harry asked, "How much do you know about Hogwarts?"

"We know some of what you see, but not everything. Some names we have, but not all. You speak quietly much of the day, but it's as though you're participating in a conversation of which none of us are a part. Sometimes, though very rarely, you answer our questions, but if we try telling you anything of this world, you ignore us and go back to muttering. Also, on several occasions you've gone completely catatonic, not moving or speaking for days, or even weeks, at a time."

Patting Harry's hand, James said, "It's been a very difficult five years. We visit you all the time, but you always look through us." Lily gave her son an awkward, sideways hug. When Harry hugged her back, he felt a slight twinge in his head and briefly closed his eyes.

When he opened them, he was back in Hogwarts. Harry screamed out "NO!" and was greeted by Ron and Hermione's concerned faces. They rushed over to his bedside, where Harry yelled "NO!" over and over again.

Hermione, panicking, asked, "Harry, please – please stop! Are you all right? You passed out again, but you came back very quickly this time!" Harry momentarily stopped shouting and looked to Ron for confirmation.

Glancing at the clock in the hospital wing, Ron nodded. He said, "Yeah, it's only been a little over an hour. Same place again?"

"Yeah," said Harry, suddenly filled with regret. He looked off to his side for a moment, deep in thought, and wondered if that would be the last chance he'd ever have to see his parents again. It wasn't fair. He'd already lost them once before. Then he lost Sirius, too. And now he'd probably lost them all forever.

That was my only chance to be with them. He hastily wiped at his eyes before his friends could see the tears threatening to fall again, but it was too late.

"What did you see this time?" Hermione inquired softly.

"I didn't have any pain coming back this time. None at all. In fact, I only closed my eyes for a second and when I opened them, I was back here."

"So, why were you shouting?" asked Ron.

Harry decided then that he might as well tell them, as it didn't help any holding it in. He said, "I saw...I saw my parents. They were at the hospital. They're alive there. I was in a coma because of Dudley. They're alive. Voldemort never killed them because Voldemort doesn't exist. They were with me. They spoke with me and it was the first time that I can remember it." Harry glanced at Ron and Hermione's dropped jaws for a moment before looking away. Hermione rubbed Harry's arm and he sighed dejectedly, closing his eyes in pain.

Surprised, Harry opened his eyes in Dr. Mason's office again, with his parents still at his side. It seemed like very little time had passed since he'd last been there, which was confirmed when James told him he'd gone glassy-eyed and unresponsive for a few minutes. Shocked, Harry watched his father suddenly grow angry, though the anger wasn't directed towards him.

"I want to know," James demanded, "what exactly you can do to stop this from happening to my son." James eyed Dr. Mason warily and Lily placed a warning hand on her husband's forearm.

Dr. Mason said, "Harry alone can stop this from happening. I believe he is trying very hard to stay with us. He's never returned from his catatonic state so quickly before. It gives me hope and it should do the same for you."

The mood in the office shifted considerably. Before, Lily and James seemed filled with hope and nearly giddy with the promise of having their son back in their lives. Now, with reality settling in again, each clutched at Harry almost painfully. He believed they might actually be trying to physically restrain him from leaving their presence again and he wasn't all that startled that he might want that, too. He grabbed for his mother's hand and squeezed it tight.

Three loud knocks sounded at the office door, breaking the room's sober atmosphere. Confused, Harry looked to the three adults present, who now looked quite a bit happier than they had a moment ago. Dr. Mason stood up to answer the door, telling Harry he thought there might be someone he'd like to see on the other side of the door. Harry's curiosity took hold of him and he eyed the door with slight suspicion. The someone at the door knocked again, this time more impatiently.

Dr. Mason greeted the person on the other side of the door. When the man answered, Harry felt his stomach drop to his knees, but he leaped up to embrace him, anyway. "Sirius!" he shouted, his voice muffled by having his face buried in his godfather's shoulder.

Sirius Black was alive.

"Harry," breathed Sirius, his voice filled with emotion. "I take it you know who I am?" Harry managed a nod, though his face was still pressed to Sirius. He reluctantly pulled away.

"You're supposed to be dead!" Harry said half-accusingly. "You fell through the veil and you left me. It was all my fault." Harry's voice wavered dangerously and he wondered when exactly he'd become such a big crybaby. If this truly was all a big stunt by Voldemort, - if Sirius and his parents were impostors - he would make him pay. Over and over again, if at all possible. Harry felt a surge of anger, which was quickly quashed when he remembered the three people in the room.

Sirius broke out into his familiar grin and Harry observed that this was the way Sirius was supposed to look. Without the years in prison, Sirius was still handsome and his blue eyes had a child-like quality that Harry doubted his own eyes even held. "Group hug!" he shouted and the Potters laughed. They did, however, comply with his request and surrounded Harry. As his mum, his dad, and his godfather nearly squeezed the life out of him, Harry never felt more loved or accepted. He felt like he belonged.

Lily, James, and Sirius chatted with the familiarity that only long-time friends could achieve. Harry was briefly overcome with the feeling that they were monopolising his doctor's office, but the man was listening to the threesome with almost as much interest as Harry was. It occurred to Harry that if Dr. Mason had truly been Harry's doctor for the past six years and in such an intimate environment that he would indeed have an intense interest in Harry and his family's lives. He caught the doctor's eye and smiled, a gesture which was quickly returned.

Sirius nudged Harry and asked, "Harry, do you remember me telling you how these two met?" He jerked his thumb in the direction of Harry's parents.

Harry shook his head vigorously, hungry for any information he could obtain. Sadly, he replied, "I don't have any recollection of my time here... before. Tell me."

If Sirius was uncomfortable with the subject of Harry's other life or the memory loss that supposedly accompanied the accident in this one, he didn't show it. With a mischievous gleam in his eyes, he said conspiratorially to Harry, "Well, she was mine first. Mr. Potter over there stole her right out from under my nose."

Harry gaped. "You mean you dated mum first?"

With mock solemnity, Sirius nodded. "Oh yes," he said, teasingly. "Ms. Lily Evans sweetly agreed to accompany me on a date after we met in a pub, only to lock eyes with my best mate while we were all out to dinner. It was the first and last time I'd ever seen your father speechless, you know." This statement earned him a cuff about the ear, courtesy of James.

James retorted, "Well, if I was a girl out with you, I'd have fallen for the first good looking bloke I'd seen, too!"

"Now, now, boys. You're both pretty," said Lily, jokingly. "I just have a thing about men in glasses. You never stood a chance, Sirius."

"It all turned out okay," Sirius assured Harry. "I met a drop-dead gorgeous blonde that night and your mum married your dad." Sirius and Harry looked at the old marrieds, now snuggling on the sofa. Sirius pulled up a chair, facing Lily and James, and motioned for Harry to do the same. "Well. Maybe Lily got the short end of the stick." Harry laughed and Sirius earned himself another playful punch, this time from Lily herself.

"You don't know how happy I am to see you," said Harry to Sirius a little while later. "You're the closest thing to a father I've ever known." He glanced at his parents to gauge their reaction, but they seemed relatively calm. "Ever since you...died, I've been so lost. I needed you there, but you weren't."

"I'm here now, Harry," said his godfather, enveloping him in another hug.

"We are, too," said his father as he rubbed Lily's back. "You're safe here."

Dr. Mason said, "Yes, Harry. You're safe here. Promise me you'll work as hard as you can to stay with us."

After a moment's hesitation, Harry agreed, even though he had no idea how to achieve this, because he desperately wanted to keep these warm feelings he was experiencing. To his family, he said, "Tell me another story."

"Ah," said Sirius fondly, patting Harry's hand. "I remember the first time I laid eyes on you. You were only six hours old. Your father handed me to you, though your mother wanted nothing more than for us all to get out so she could get some sleep. You were so tiny, I could have held you in one hand."

James agreed. "I think I tried that, too. I was lucky Lily was so tired or I probably would have been beaten senseless." Lily swatted at James's arm.

Sirius glared at his best friend and said, "Will you please hush up for once? I'm trying to tell a story!"

James threw up his hands in defeat. "Fine, fine. I know when I'm beaten – and outnumbered," he added, glancing warily from Lily to Sirius.

"Where was I? Oh yes - I wanted to hold you in one hand, but didn't because I'm smarter than your father and I know Lily would have killed me." He smiled at Harry and said, "You had ten perfect little fingers and ten perfect little toes, the most gorgeous pair of green eyes courtesy of your mum and the worst case of bed head I'd ever seen. It left no doubt who your father was, at any rate. Ow!" Sirius broke off when James issued a quick kick to his shin.

"Anyway, it was love at first sight, which was saying a lot for me because I'd never known what that felt like. When I looked at your parents, I knew it was the same for them. We were all absolutely besotted by a twenty inch creature wailing his brains out and who'd just shit his nappy." Harry blushed deeply and Sirius laughed at his reaction.

Fondly, Lily continued, "When we told Sirius that he was going to be your godfather, he had such a look of shock and pleasure on his face. In fact, he was so shocked I made your father take you from him because I was afraid he was going to drop you."

"He's right, you know," said James. "We were all absolutely in love. As were your grandparents and our other friends and just about everyone else that came in contact with you. We still are."

Harry looked at them with surprise. "I have grandparents?"

Lily chuckled. "Oh yes," she replied. "Four of them, all of whom have been waiting a very long time for you to come back to them. We've all missed you very much."

Dr. Mason cleared his throat, obviously regretting having to interrupt the reunion. "I'm sorry, folks," he said. "We need to be getting Harry back. He's still having episodes, so he'll have to stay here for observation and we want to run some tests." At seeing Harry's crestfallen face, he assured him, "You'll see your parents tomorrow, I promise. You should eat and get some sleep, though, and I have another patient meeting me in a few minutes."

Harry embraced his parents and Sirius once again. His mum placed a kiss on his forehead and promised, "We'll see you tomorrow. We'll be back. All of us." It was almost painful to watch them all leave. Defeated, he let an orderly he couldn't identify lead him back to the Upper Boys' Ward.

On his way back, he saw Draco Malfoy being led in the direction from which he'd just come. Draco didn't look well. Dark circles could be seen standing in relief from his pale face and he looked steadfastly at his shoes, hands clasped in front of his body. Something about his whole body spelled defeat and Harry was reminded of Sirius's time in 12 Grimmauld Place. As the two boys passed, Draco looked up and met Harry's gaze. The pair stared at each other for a moment and Harry was overwhelmed with the urge to reach out to Draco. The two, almost imperceptibly, brushed hands and continued in opposite directions down the corridor.

Before Draco was out of sight, Harry felt a slight burning in his scar and, recognising the symptoms, whispered a desperate "No!" to himself. He briefly closed his eyes once again.

And opened them in the darkened Hogwarts hospital wing. It took him a minute to acclimate to his surroundings, which made sense, as he'd just been upright, walking, and in bright light. Now, he was in near darkness, prone, and well, obviously not doing a whole hell of a lot of walking. His stomach rumbled and he wondered if his hunger was cumulative.

Probably not, he reasoned. I honestly can't remember the last time I ate, but I'm obviously being fed both here and there. Still. It would be nice to actually be present for a meal.

Considering it was the dead of night, there wasn't much hope of calling Madam Pomfrey for some food and he really didn't want to deal with her if he was caught sneaking down to the kitchens, so he settled for hunting for food in the hospital wing. He fumbled around his bedside table for his wand and muttered a quick "Lumos" under his breath.

Jackpot! Next to his bed, someone had left several Chocolate Frogs. Probably Ron or Hermione, thinking that he might wake in the night. He unwrapped a Frog. Just when he was about to shove it in his mouth, he noticed movement in the room. He dropped the chocolate and groped for his illuminated wand, which he'd placed at his side.

"Potter," spat a voice from the darkness. Malfoy emerged from the shadows, an almost psychotic look twisting his pale features. Despite the fact that by the look on Malfoy's face, Harry was probably in mortal danger, he paused to observe that while Draco wasn't exactly beautiful, he certainly had some interesting features.

What the hell is wrong with me? Harry shook off that traitorous thought and prepared for Malfoy to make the first move.

"Potter," said Malfoy again, approaching the bed. "Look at Dumbledore's Golden Boy now. Laid up in a bed, having fainting spells." He placed the back of his hand to his forehead and sighed dramatically. In a high voice, he mocked, "'Oh, someone save me!'" Malfoy snickered.

Harry sighed and calmly asked, "What do you want, Malfoy?"

"I just wanted to see if the rumours were true. Harry Potter's been done in by his own head. Well," he said, sneering, "I always knew you were cracked. It's about time everyone else did, too." He now stood so close that Harry's knees were brushing against Malfoy's thighs. "The Dark Lord was eventually going to break you. Father always said so. And he'll escape from Azkaban any day now."

At first glance, Malfoy seemed to look triumphant, but Harry thought his words lacked conviction. In fact, there was a look of defeat that reminded Harry heavily of the Draco he'd just left at St. George's.

Still scared of Voldemort, are you? I wonder if you're better off at St. George's too, even with your father dead.

Draco looked at him sharply. "What did you just say?"

"Oh shit." Harry had spoken out loud. "Listen, Malfoy, you weren't meant to hear that. Sorry. I was just babbling." Before he realised what he was doing, he reached out to grab Draco's hand. Draco's eyes widened, but the two stayed in that position for a beat, with Harry's hand atop Draco's. Then Malfoy turned tail and ran away from Harry at top speed.

Harry stared at Draco's retreating form for a moment, then retrieved his fallen Chocolate Frog, using the guiding light from his wand. "Well," he said out loud to no one, while chewing thoughtfully, "that was interesting. Nox."