My Life is a Movie

Chapter 2: Movie Night

"Mr. Malfoy! Mr. Malfoy! I have something of yours."*

"Mine? I don't know what you're talking about,"* Lucius Malfoy proclaimed with a manner of arrogance.

"Boooo!" Ron yelled, throwing popcorn at the man on the screen.

"Oh, I think you do sir. I think you slipped the diary into Ginny Weasley's cauldron, that day at Diagon Alley,"* Harry countered.

"You do, do you?"* he asked as he handed Dobby the diary. "Why don't you prove it? Come Dobby."*

"Oh wait, here comes the best part," Hermione proclaimed in excitement. The four young teens sitting in the dark, but comfy, family room quieted themselves so they wouldn't miss a single word.

"You've lost me my servant!"* the older man accused. He then pulled out his wand from the top of his walking stick and pointed it at Harry.

Dobby's eyes narrowed at his former master and warned, "You shall not harm Harry Potter!"*

The man was not listening however, and as he began to cast the worst of the Unforgivable spells, Dobby blasted him off his feet, throwing the older man unceremoniously against the wall.

Clapping, loud whistles, and shouts of "Go Dobby!" and "Take that you filthy bastard!" were heard throughout the room. As the movie finished Hermione walked over to the telly to turn it off and get the DVD from the player.

It had been five days since Hermione had met Todd and learned everything she could about the whole Harry Potter craze. She now knew that there weren't just movies out there about Harry, but books, magazines, websites, and even Harry Potter merchandise. Todd had told her how the books had come out first and then the movies; each one focusing on one year of Harry's life at Hogwarts.

The thing that confused her though was the fact that the first book came out in 1997. She had initially thought that maybe the author had simply written the books after all the events took place, but how can that be when the first book came out nearly two years before they even started at Hogwarts, which was in 1999.

This led her to believe that perhaps the author was some kind of Seer or Prophet. This idea excited her because she thought that maybe the author might be able to help them in the war against Voldemort.

After thanking Todd graciously and getting his email address so she could keep in contact with him, she quickly hurried home so she could owl her friends about the new info she had just acquired. They were all rather sceptical at first, but when Hermione assured them it was all true and that she in fact had already obtained the complete set of books and movies, they flooed over to her house to see for themselves.

Now Hermione, Harry, Ron and Ginny were all in Hermione's family room having just finished watching Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. They had been there for several hours now, discussing the whole predicament and watching the first two movies.

"Oh Harry," Ginny yelled in an overly girly voice as she got up from her seat on the floor. She ran over to Harry, nearly tackling him over. "You're my hero!" she said playfully as she threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly and giggling uncontrollably. Harry, who was sitting in the middle of the couch, merely shrugged as he embraced her back.

"There, there Gin," he told her while patting her back gently. "It's no big deal. All in a day's work I always say," he said nobly with a smug smile on his face. Ginny just laughed more.

Harry, who had just arrived at the Burrow when Hermione's first owl arrived, was feeling somewhat better than he had been over the last few weeks. Of course he still hadn't gotten over his godfather's death, or the facts of the prophecy that were presented to him by Dumbledore right before he left school, but he had somehow learned to suppress his feelings outwardly, allowing him to be more of himself with his friends. However, after hearing that most of the Muggle world knew who he was still seemed too surreal for him to grasp.

Ron rolled his eyes and shook his head. "You know, I hate that git that plays me," he said with a revolted look on his face. "I mean, he doesn't even look like me!"

"Sure he does," Ginny said as she casually ran her fingers through her shoulder length red hair and sat back on the couch next to Harry. "He's just cuter."

"WHAT?!" Ron exclaimed, looking appalled. "Are you bloody mad woman?! He is not cuter than me. He kept making those disgusting little faces, and talking in that annoying high pitched voice. I don't do that!"

Hermione sat down on the other side of Harry and replied, "Ron, you're just jealous. Besides, those faces he makes aren't disgusting, they're adorable."

"Yeah," Ginny agreed, "and you do talk like that sometimes."

"No I don't," Ron insisted.

"Sure you do," Ginny replied simply.

"No, I don't!"

"Yes, you do."

"NO. I. DON'T!"

"Oh crap Ron! Look, a spider!" Ginny cried out, pointing at a spot on the floor near Ron.

"Sp... spider? Where?" Ron exclaimed in a high pitched voice, jumping up from his sitting position.

"Ha! See, I told you," Ginny snickered. Harry and Hermione laughed as their best friend's face turned flush with embarrassment.

"Shut it Gin. That wasn't funny," Ron scowled.

"Yeah it was," was Ginny's good natured reply.

Ron glared at his sister as he took his seat on the floor once more, but not before quickly scanning the vicinity to make sure there really wasn't any spider.

"Anyway," Harry said before another fight between the two siblings could break out again, "what book are you on now, Hermione?"

"Oh, I'm halfway done with the fourth book," the brunette informed him. She got up from her seat and walked over to a small wooden desk on the other side of the room. She picked up a set of books and brought them to the coffee table. She grabbed the first three books and started passing them out. "You guys can start reading the first three if you want. Or we can watch the third movie first."

Harry, Ron, and Ginny each looked down at the book in their hands and started flipping through them, reading the chapter titles and looking at the little illustrations. "I found that the books are more accurate than the movies, but they still contain some discrepancies."

"I see," Harry replied, not looking up, he was too preoccupied with the picture of Norbert in the first book. "So did you find anything that can help the Order?"

Hermione frowned. "Well not exactly," she said as she walked over to the desk once more and brought back a thin spiral notebook. "I found some details that might help and I wrote them down, but there wasn't anything too significant." She handed the notebook over to Harry so he can take a look for himself. "The books are in third person and they mostly follow you. So far, there was only one chapter that followed what Voldemort was doing."

Although Hermione briefly noticed Ron cringe at the mention of The Dark Lord's name, she continued anyway. "But it was because it was a dream that you had," she informed. She looked at Harry worriedly. "This means we can't let anyone besides the Order know about this. If this info falls into the wrong hands..." she let the sentence hang, not even wanting to think about what might happen if Voldemort or one of his death eaters found about this. They would know everything about Harry; his thoughts, fears, strengths, weaknesses, everything. She shuddered.

"But you did say that the author put a powerful hex on everything so no wizard or witch could go anywhere near anything Harry Potter related, right?" Ginny asked. "You know, like the spells they used during the Quidditch World Cup, the ones that cause you to remember something important when you get too close."

"Yes, but she neglected to put any on the cast and crew of the movies, remember? That's how I found out about it. Come to think of it, she didn't put any on the fans either," Hermione said as she remembered the two young girls from the café that had asked Todd for his autograph. "Suppose some Death Eater was walking down the street and overhears a conversation of a group of Muggles about their favourite movie, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban?" Hermione asked, shaking her head. "I just wish I knew the spell she used so I can cast it on them myself."

"You don't know it?" Ron asked, bewildered. "But how can you do the counterspell on all these," he gestured towards the books and DVDs on the table, "if you don't know the original spell in the first place?"

"The spell wears off from the object when someone tells you about it. That's how I got the books and movies," she told them.

"But I thought you said it was powerful. How could it just wear off?" Harry asked.

"Well I'm not quite sure," Hermione replied honestly. "But I know it's powerful because it works on Muggle relatives as well. When I first got the books and was reading them in my room, my mum tried to come in, but when she reached the doorway she remembered that she needed to turn off the oven. After it happened about three times, I came to the conclusion that it must be the spell. So, after finally telling her about the book, it stopped happening."

"Hmm..." Harry thought for a moment. "That explains how The Dursley's didn't know anything about this." He looked back down at his book, staring at the cover which had a picture of him flying on his broom. "Why don't we just contact the author?" he offered.

Hermione looked doubtful, "I'm not sure if that's a good idea. We don't exactly know if she's on our side or not. We have to see if Dumbledore knows her first."

Ron's eyes brightened as an idea came to his mind. "Of course she's on our side," Ron insisted. "Anyway, it's brilliant. She's the author right? So she has to make it end with Harry winning. I mean, he is the hero. It only makes sense doesn't it?"

"Just because she's the author doesn't mean she can make things happen," Hermione told him.

"What are you talking about?" Ron asked confused. "Authors are the ones that make up the story aren't they?"

"Don't be daft," she scolded. "She's probably a Seer and just predicts the events before they happen. If we need to contact her for anything, it's to find out if she knows what's going to happen with Voldemort."

Ron winced again and Hermione just rolled her eyes. "Ron, just get over it already."

Suddenly Ginny gasped as she thought of something. Everyone turned to look at her questioningly. "You said there's only going to be seven books right?" she asked Hermione. The brunette nodded. "So, that means more than likely all this is going to end by your seventh year," she said gravely as she looked around the room. Harry, Hermione, and Ron looked at each other as they let Ginny's words sink in. She was right. All this would come to an end within the next two years.

After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Hermione cleared her throat and spoke, "Well, let's at least finish the last movie, so we can go talk to Dumbledore when we're done."

She went over to put the third movie into the DVD player. "He's going to stop by the Burrow tonight, right?"

"Yeah, that's what mum said," Ron replied. "He's stopping by for a while after the Order meeting."

"OK, well, we should be about done by then."

The room quieted down as the first scene opened to Harry alone in his dark room, playing with his wand under a blanket.

***

"Well, that's the last movie." Hermione responded from her seat on the couch. "They just started filming the fourth one, so it's not done yet."

"When will it be finished?" Ginny asked curiously.

"Todd said it should be out around November of next year," Hermione answered. A simple "oh" was heard as the four teenagers sat staring at each other.

Harry noticed Ron grinning slightly and asked, "What are you thinking about mate?"

Ron turned to face his friend, "Don't you think that actress that plays Hermione is fit?" he asked, his grin broadening devilishly. Harry smiled in understanding and was about to concur when Hermione interrupted.

"What are you trying to say Ronald? You think she's better looking than me or something?" Hermione glared down at her friend who was still perched on the floor.

"No, no. Of co... course not," Ron stuttered. He scooted away slightly, afraid he had gotten himself into something he couldn't handle. Harry, feeling sympathetic towards his friend, tried to help out by changing the subject.

"Hey, did you guys notice how some of the actors look like us, I mean, not us, but the characters they're based on, but others don't?" The other three looked pensive for a moment.

"Yeah," Ginny began, "a lot of the guy actors look almost exactly the same as their counterparts, especially Ron's and Malfoy's, but most of the girl actresses look nothing like us." She looked around at them thoughtfully, "I wonder why that is."

"They probably wanted the girls to look prettier than you, and..." Ron started; he was unaware of the angry expressions that shone on the girls' faces when he spoke.

"Excuse me!?" Hermione demanded incredulously.

Ron jumped at her tone, his blue eyes widening in fear as he finally realised that he had made yet another mistake by opening his big mouth.

"Er... I mean... uh..." He looked at the odious scowls on both girls' faces. "Um... you didn't let me finish," he said looking desperate. "You see, I was about to say that, umm... that... well, that they wanted the girls to look prettier than the real characters, so... uh... I mean, you know, they couldn't find anyone as beautiful as you, so they just settled for those average looking girls," he made up lamely, a hopeful smile on his face.

The girls continued to glare at him.

Harry shook his head slightly, deciding to help out his friend from another bad situation for the second time in less than two minutes.

"I think you're right Ron," he said confidently. The girls turned their heads to glare at him as well. "Of course they couldn't find anyone more beautiful than them. Nothing can compare to the original."

He flashed a charming smile at both girls in turn and put an arm around each of them. The girls smiled back at him, obviously pleased with his comment.

Seeing their smiles, Ron sighed in relief, thinking he was out of trouble, but as soon as he let out his breath, they snapped their heads back towards him and sneered. He immediately straightened up and prepared himself for a verbal attack. Harry sighed, wondering how Ron could get in so much trouble so fast.

"So we finished the movies and you're pretty much done with the books Hermione," he commented, looking at her. "Is there anything else we should know about?"

Tearing her eyes off Ron, Hermione turned to face Harry's general direction, a meditative expression on her face.

"Hmm... what else is there?" she asked herself out loud, tapping a finger to her lip as she thought. "Oh yeah," she said suddenly, getting up and walking over to the desk once again. "I can't believe I almost forgot. How can I be so daft? This can really help us," she was mumbling to herself. Her three friends looked at her inquisitively.

"What can?" Ginny asked as Hermione carried something over to the coffee table; she sat down on the floor in front of Harry and Ginny. Ron moved next to her to check out the flat rectangular object she had placed on the table.

"Websites!" Hermione exclaimed happily, opening up the laptop.

"Web... websites?" Ron asked in his high pitched voice. "Like from sp... spiders?" He backed away quickly from the computer.

"Don't be silly Ron. Websites don't come from spiders, they come from computers. That's what this machine is here," she explained, pointing to her laptop. "Websites are simply just collections of information separated into pages that you can access online."

Ron still didn't understand what a website was, but stepped closer to the machine tentatively to get a better look.

"There are probably millions of Harry Potter sites out there but I can only get to a few of them because of the spell."

"Did you say millions?" Harry asked disbelievingly. Growing up with Dudley, he had already known what websites were, but knowing that there were that many dedicated to him made him feel slightly ill.

"Well maybe not millions," Hermione replied distractedly, typing and clicking away on her laptop, "but close enough. Anyway, the only sites I can access right now are the few that Todd told me about. Oh, and the fan fiction ones as well," she added, and then shook her head not wanting to think about that particular subject.

"What's fan fiction?" Ron asked.

"I still can't believe I almost forgot about the websites, they have so much information we can use," Hermione told them, her eyes focused on the screen in front of her. "Well, kind of. I mean, they don't offer as many actual facts as the books, but a lot of fan made sites contain theories of what people think might happen in the upcoming books."

"What's fan fiction?" Ron asked again.

However, Hermione simply continued her rambling. "A lot of the theories make sense, so I'll have to write those down so we can show Dumbledore." She grabbed the notebook that she had shown Harry earlier from the other side of the table. "But, some of these other theories are just ridiculous."

"Like what?" Harry asked.

"What's fan fiction?" Ron persisted.

"Like Neville being Pettigrew's son, or Dumbledore being your grandfather. There's even one about me being Voldemort's long lost daughter!" she cried out, surprised by how someone could think up something so preposterous.

"What the bloody hell? That's just stupid!" Harry exclaimed. Ginny nodded in agreement, too shocked to say anything at the moment.

"I know," Hermione agreed, "That's what I was thin..."

"What's fan fiction?"

"Damn it Ron," she replied, frustrated. "Fan fiction is when a fan writes their own story based upon and using the characters or locations from the book or movie."

"Oh," Ron said, his brow furrowed. "Why didn't you just say that?" He wondered why it had taken her so long to answer such a simple question.

"Because, it creeps me out," she replied hesitantly.

"Why?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

"Because. Most of the time the stories are about a couple," Hermione admitted.

Ron looked at her confused. "A couple of what?"

Hermione looked at him annoyed. "A couple. You know, like two people. A pair."

"Oh... So?" Ron still didn't understand why it would creep her out so much.

"So, it's just weird how they would pair people together like that." Hermione turned her head down, looking away from him.

"Oooh..." Ron responded, finally understanding. "Eww, you mean like you and me?" he asked, horror-struck.

"Yes, exactly," she replied, matching his disgusted look. "Isn't that bizarre?"

Ron thought it over for a moment. "You know, now that I think about it," he started. "I noticed in the movies, especially in the third one, that our characters seemed..." he paused, thinking about how he should word this. "They seemed like they liked each other a bit more than normal," he established. "Do you think it means anything?" Ron wondered if maybe it was a foreshadowing of something that was going to happen in the future.

"I don't know," the brunette admitted truthfully. "I hope not."

"Hey!" Ron responded, obviously offended.

"No, I mean, it's not that you look bad or anything."

Ron frowned at her.

"Because you don't," Hermione assured quickly. "It's just, you know. You're like a brother to me. And, well..."

He laughed at her uneasy look, "Yeah, I know what you're saying." Ron placed a gentle hand on her arm and smiled. "I feel the same way."

Hermione smiled back, happy the conversation didn't lead to anything more awkward. "Do you want to know what ship is bigger than ours though?" she asked him, a mischievous smile on her lips.

"Ship? You mean like a boat?" Ron asked, a hilarious but cute bewildered look forming on his face.

She laughed at him amiably. "No. Ship. As in relationship. Like a pairing," she explained.

"Oh. Er... Ginny and Harry?" Ron answered.

Hearing their names, they looked at Hermione to see what she would say.

"No. Although, that pairing is quite popular."

"Really?" Ginny asked in awe, happy that many people thought she and Harry made a good couple, even if she was seeing Dean Thomas at the moment.

Hermione smiled and nodded.

Harry and Ginny looked at each other uncomfortably then looked away.

Ron tried again, "You and Harry?"

"Nope."

"Ron and Harry?" Ginny contributed playfully.

"No," Hermione replied, her smile growing wider. "But you're close."

"Huh?" Harry cried out, looking horrified.

"Who is it? Who is it?" Ginny asked, bouncing up and down with excitement.

"Harry and Malfoy!" Hermione revealed gleefully, her toffee colored eyes dancing with cheer.

Both girls burst out laughing, while Ron on the other hand, was so appalled he looked like he was about to be sick.

"What?!" Harry yelled in outrage. "How the bloody hell can Malfoy and I be a more popular couple than you two?! I mean, hell, I can even understand pug-faced Parkinson and me. But bloody Malfoy?" He started pacing the room hurriedly, "I hate that blasted prick! How can they think that that stupid ferret faced little - "

"Harry calm down," Hermione said, as she rushed over to him and placed her hands on his shoulders to stop him from pacing. "I didn't say you guys were the most popular pairing. I just said you had a rather large following."

She tried to stop herself from laughing, but it was too hard when she could see Ginny from the corner of her eye giggling silently.

Harry groaned loudly.

***

When Harry had calmed down and the girls' laughter had died away, they crowded around Hermione and her laptop once again to see what they could find. After a few minutes Ginny wondered out loud, "What is the most popular pairing?"

Hermione, however, did not answer.

"Hermione?" she asked, trying to get the other girl's attention.

"Hmm?" was the only reply.

"What's the largest pairing?" Ginny asked again.

"Oh, er..." Hermione mumbled something incoherently.

"What did you say?"

"Er, me and Malfoy," she said softly.

This time, the boys started laughing noisily. Hermione turned her head to stare angrily at them.

"What's so funny? Is it so hard to believe Malfoy would want to be with me?" she asked harshly.

The laughing stopped abruptly. Both boys looked at her cautiously. Harry, being more used to dangerous situations decided to respond first.

"No, of course not," he assured her, taking a few timid steps closer. "We, er... we merely found it hilarious that people would even consider a kind, intelligent, beautiful girl like you being with a spoiled, arrogant, egotistical bastard like Malfoy," he told her honestly.

"Yeah 'Mione," Ron put in, "We know Malfoy is way below your league. It's just funny to think that there are people out there dumb enough to deem him your partner."

Hermione stayed silent as she surveyed both boys, trying to decide if they were telling the truth. Seeing the sincerity in their eyes, she said, "All right, fine."

She didn't really know why she had gotten so riled up when they started laughing, but when they did, something just made her feel saddened. When she first learned of the fact that many of the fans had thought that she and Malfoy made such a great couple, she had felt disgusted.

How can someone actually think we're even remotely compatible? Hermione had asked herself. We hate each other with a passion, and we have nothing in common. Besides, Malfoy is such an insufferable prat. Where do they get off thinking we're perfect for one another?

However, curiosity got the better of her and she decided to read a few of the stories herself, just to see what others possibly saw in her and Malfoy. The first few stories made Hermione feel dirty, they were filled with smutty scenes and barely had any plot at all, so she didn't even bother to finish reading them. Others were just so random she couldn't possibly follow what was going on, so she quickly moved on in her search. Finally, after about the tenth story she came across, she had found one that was absolutely amazing. Not only was it well written and eloquent, but the transition from hate to tolerance to friendship to love was realistic and utterly romantic. Hermione couldn't help but wish it did happen to her, even if it was with Malfoy. Actually, the whole story had left her feeling quite flattered that people wanted her and Malfoy to get together. If only he was like his character was in that story.

She sighed at the thought, Oh well.

Harry and Ron shared a weird look with each other as Hermione seemed to be contemplating over something in her head.

Ginny, who had also noticed the faraway look on the other girl's face, decided to find out what was wrong. She placed one of her hands on her friend's shoulder and said, "What is it Hermione? Is everything OK?"

Hermione looked at her friends and saw looks of distress on their faces. "Oh yeah, I'm sorry," she assured them. "I don't know why I got so upset. I guess this whole thing is just too much to handle."

She shook her head and smiled slightly. "Anyway, we don't have to worry. I know for a fact that, Malfoy and I will never get together." She looked away from them, trying to hide the blush that was starting to creep onto her face. She went back to her laptop and the others followed. "The author said so herself on her website."

"Really?" Harry asked, more interested in the fact that the author had a website, than with any relationship having to do with his best friend and that filthy ferret. "What else does it say on her site?"

"Well," Hermione started. "Let's just have a look, shall we?" She started typing away at her laptop once more. The three others swarmed around her, trying to glance at the screen as well.

They looked over the author's site enthusiastically. Each of them trying to find all the hidden prizes scattered throughout it, while also thinking about which bit of information they could add to the notebook.

An hour and a half later, (much of which was spent waiting for the 'Do Not Disturb' door to open on the author's website) the four found themselves relaxing peacefully, drinking tea Hermione had made and eating some left over popcorn. They were all worn out from a full day of researching all they possibly could about this crazy new situation. All they wanted to do for now was rest.

"Well today has been quite informative, don't you think?" Hermione asked Ginny coolly. She and Ginny were sitting lethargically on the couch. The two boys were stationed on the floor in front of the TV, watching what appeared to be a very entertaining comedy. They had already filled up the thin notebook Hermione had originally started writing in, as well as half of another.

"I suppose it has, hasn't it?" Ginny replied, turning in her seat so she could braid Hermione's hair. "We need to get going soon though."

Hermione looked at her watch and sighed, it was almost 11:00 PM. "Hmm... I suppose we do." She turned her head slightly to look at the boys as Ginny continued to play with her hair. "Come on guys, we need to go now."

However, the boys were too preoccupied with the sitcom to hear her. She tried again, "Guys, come on, let's go."

Still no response.

Hermione groaned exasperatedly.

Ginny giggled softly; amused by the boys' lack of attention to anything but the telly, and the anxiety it was causing her easily agitated friend.

"Here, let me help," she offered with an impish gleam in her eyes. She stood up from her sitting position and shrieked convincingly, "Eww, look! Another spider!"

Ron immediately whipped his head around to see where his sister was looking, his face almost an exact replica of the expression the actor makes - the one he had earlier complained of as disgusting. Seeing the playful smirk on his sister's face, he scowled.

"Would you stop doing that?" he groaned. "I told you, it's not funny."

"And I told you it was," Ginny informed him. "Come on, we need to go now."