Harry Potter and the Silent Siege

Chapter 11

The Day After

The sixth-year Gryffindor boys' dormitory was bathed in pink light from the autumn sunrise. Somewhere on the school grounds a rooster crowed, owls squawked in the owlery, and Harry Potter opened his eyes.

And then he remembered what had happened the day before. And it was all he could do not to pull the covers back over his head and try to sleep again.

But Harry forced himself to wake up. Though he had not yet looked at his watch, he knew that at this time of year, the sun rose only a little before breakfast and he still had lessons that morning after all. Harry was starting to agree with Professor Sprout that it was criminal to hold a dance on a school night and expect students to go to classes the next day.

Around Harry, his other roommates were slowly rising. Dean was shaking his head to clear the cobwebs, Seamus couldn't seem to stop yawning, and Neville looked as if he had been struck in the head with a heavy pole. But Ron was still fast asleep. Harry was about to wake him for breakfast but then thought better of it. He doubted whether Ron had gotten to sleep very early the night before. He decided he would wake him if he was still asleep when he returned from breakfast.

Harry got dressed and walked down the steps into the common room which was full of the usual early morning activity on a school day. Students were spilling out of their rooms, walking in and out of bathrooms, avoiding bumping into each other, and finally leaving for breakfast. The only difference on this morning was that things were unusually quiet as the sleep-deprived Gryffindors stumbled about like the living dead.

Which was perhaps how Hermione managed to remain fast asleep, curled up in a ball on the sofa like a hibernating hedgehog, covered in a blanket of scattered S.P.E.W. parchments.

Harry walked over to her and sighed. Gingerly, so as not to wake her, he picked up his best friend's scattered notes and placed them back into a folder which was lying on the table and then walked down to breakfast.

The hall looked much the same as usual. There was little indication it had been recently used for anything different. For the first time, Harry found himself a little curious about what had taken place here the night before. He supposed he could ask Ron and Hermione but he doubted they would be in the mood to answer his questions when they finally woke up.

Harry walked toward the Gryffindor table and was surprised to see Ginny sitting by herself near the middle. He thought of walking toward her but then hesitated. He had enjoyed himself very much with her last night at first. He had forgotten all about the Death Eaters and their plans. He had rarely felt anything take him out of his fears and problems so completely, other than Quidditch.

But then things had very suddenly changed. Very quickly, Harry had not felt relaxed and carefree at all. Harry felt a horrible anxiety come over him when he remembered how Ginny had asked him to play wizard truth. Why had she wanted to play the game and why had she seemed to egg him on to ask harder and harder questions? The more he thought about it, the more uncomfortable he felt.

But worse than this was the fact that Harry himself had asked her about the Valentine. He wasn't sure what could have possibly made him do that. The truth was, of course, he had been curious about it for years, but that was no excuse. He could only conclude that Ginny had somehow gotten him worked up about the game. Whatever the case, it had been a horrible mistake. Harry suddenly felt very queasy. Seamus and Dean walked in and sat near the head of the table. It would be very natural to go over and sit next to them. But Harry knew he had a duty to be fair to Ginny. He couldn't let this hang and drag on. And he knew he wouldn't get a better chance. Ron was in bed fast asleep. He wouldn't have to know anything.

Harry took a deep breath and put his tray down in front of Ginny.

Ginny, who seemed deep in thought, looked up suddenly, jumpy and startled again.

"Sorry," said Harry.

Harry immediately noticed that Ginny looked very pale and almost frightened. As she looked him up and down for a moment, Harry had the curious feeling she was trying to make sure he was still there. Then Ginny abruptly smiled and a little color returned to her cheeks.

"Hi, Harry," she said.

"Are you all right, Ginny? You look a little pale," asked Harry.

"Oh," said Ginny, looking a little non-plussed. "I - I'm fine. I just didn't sleep all that well last night."

"Oh, I'm sorry," said Harry, a little stiffly. "Where are your roommates?"

Ginny pointed over to the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff tables where Catherine and Amanda were sitting respectively. Each seemed deep in conversation with their dates from the previous night. Indeed, as Harry looked all around the hall it seemed that inter-house relations were at an unusual peak.

"Oh," said Harry, turning back to Ginny. "Listen, Ginny, about last night."

Ginny was smiling even more broadly now but Harry did not notice as he was looking down at the table.

"I - I really had a good time, I mean, especially the dancing. Thanks for showing me the new song spell."

"Maybe we can do it again some time?"

"Oh, yes. I - I hope so. Ginny, look, I want to apologize about something, though."

Ginny's smile quickly faded. "Apologize? For what, Harry?"

"W - Well." Harry studiously examined his wizard puffs. "I, I, er, shouldn't have really asked you that question about the Valentine. The truth is I - I just got a little carried away with the game but I - I really should have considered your - your privacy."

"You're supposed to ask people private things in wizard truth, Harry. I could always choose not to answer."

Harry suddenly felt like his esophagus was tied in a knot. "Well, OK, but the truth is I don't really need to know and - and perhaps we can just forget about it - not the evening, I mean," he added quickly, "just about that one question."

Harry looked up hopefully and found that Ginny had gone back to looking very pale.

"I see, Harry," she mumbled. "Th - that won't be any problem." She suddenly stood up.

Harry became concerned. "But you haven't finished your breakfast?"

"Oh, uh, actually, I'm a little bit of a hurry. I have a parchment left to finish before class this morning. So, well, perhaps we'll see each other sometime later?" Ginny forced a smile.

"Oh, oh, OK."

Ginny left and Harry continued to sit at the table alone. It hadn't been the most comfortable of conversations but at least it was over now. Their friendship could develop much more easily. Ginny would have no misunderstanding about his feelings.

***

Ginny walked outside the Great Hall and paced around the staircase outside the main door for a few moments as if she was lost. She suddenly realized she wouldn't be going to class again that morning. Fortunately, it was Binns and she strongly doubted he would notice. Still, Ginny reflected to herself, if she kept missing classes like this, it wouldn't be easy to get her Prefect badge next year. Then she realized she suddenly didn't care about her prefect badge. In fact, she didn't care much about anything.

Ginny walked past the staircase and down the corridor to the other wing of the castle. All things considered, Ginny was very proud of herself that she had made it all the way into the out-of-order toilet and closed the door behind her before bursting into tears.

***

Harry finished his breakfast and started to walk out of the Great Hall. He'd supposed he would feel much better after talking to Ginny but he now found he felt somewhat empty. Harry made it halfway up the first flight of stairs back to Gryffindor Tower, thinking about his conversation with Ginny when he suddenly realized that Ron and Hermione were still asleep back in the common room. For a moment, he thought of leaving them to it but then he remembered: two years ago having been selected into the Triwizard Tournament, afraid to leave the common room himself, thinking of leaving Hogwarts even, but then a friend and a piece of toast intervened. Harry walked back into the Great Hall, put a few pieces of toast on a plate and took the plate and a cup of orange juice and went back up the stairs again.

When he arrived in the common room, Hermione was no longer asleep but was sitting down at one of the tables with her Arithmancy book open. She still had the S.P.E.W. parchments next to her on the other side but this time she hadn't opened the cover. She looked up as Harry approached.

"Uh," he said. "I - I thought you might like some breakfast."

Harry wasn't at all sure how Hermione would react. She looked up at him for a moment, not saying anything, then suddenly burst into tears, walked up from her desk and drew him into a bone-crushing hug.

Harry put one arm around Hermione and used the other to hold out the plate at arm's length so as not to upset its contents. Hermione finally pulled out of the embrace.

"Oh, Harry, I'm so confused," she said.

Harry didn't really know how to reply. He wasn't sure he felt any clearer than Hermione.

Hermione looked down at the breakfast. "I - I'm not really very hungry at the moment but thank you."

"Perhaps you'd like to go for a walk then?" suggested Harry.

It was obvious from look on Hermione's face that she felt it was an excellent idea but then she looked down at her watch. "Oh, but, Harry, we can't - we've got Care of Magical Creatures in fifteen minutes."

"Hagrid will understand," Harry replied softly.

"No, Harry!" protested Hermione. "We can't just take advantage of Hagrid like that. And we can't go around missing classes. We'll lose loads of points if we're caught!"

Harry gently took hold of Hermione's shoulders. "We're not taking advantage of him. Look, Hermione, something happened between you and Ron last night. You obviously need some time to deal with it. You're not a machine. We'll go have tea with Hagrid later. He'll understand."

Hermione reluctantly nodded and left the common room with Harry. They had made it to the portrait hole when Hermione stopped and looked back anxiously at the boys' dormitory.

"Is he - " she began.

"He's still asleep, I think," finished Harry. "I doubt he got to sleep very early last night."

"I didn't get to sleep at all," said Hermione, now walking again and leading the way out of the portrait hole. "I finally came out into the common room to work on some S.P.E.W. things and then I must have dozed off in the chair."

Harry and Hermione walked out onto the grounds. Harry had thought Hermione would start talking to him after they left the Great Hall but she didn't say a word. She led him in a large circle around the lake. It was another cool, clear day. A slight breeze blew off the surface of the water like an echo of the furious winds of the day before. Harry watched as the giant squid poked out its head from the surface of the water but then, having tested the air and found it too cold, retreated back into the murky depths.

Hermione remained silent as they completed the circle and returned to the front entrance of the castle. Harry was about to open his mouth to say something when Hermione made another turn and started a second circle. Finally, when they had nearly reached the far end of the lake again, she said very quietly:

"What will happen to you, Harry?"

Harry was very surprised. Is this what she had been thinking about all this time?

"Er, what do you mean, Hermione?" Harry asked.

"If Ron and I - " Hermione stopped and shook her head, as if in disbelief. "I don't know," she finished, her shoulders sinking.

They walked in silence for a few minutes then Harry finally said:

"What happened last night?"

Harry wondered whether Hermione would flinch at the question but if she had felt it was none of Harry's concern, she did not show it. She hesitated for a moment, then launched in an unabridged account of her date with Ron.

"So," said Harry, after she had finished, his brow creased in perplexion. "You, er, you told Ron that you really just wanted to be friends and then a few minutes later you - you were, er, well - "

"Snogging him senseless, yes," finished Hermione.

"Well," said Harry, unable to resist smiling. "It doesn't seem a little strange."

"Oh, Harry, don't you understand? I - I was nervous again. Everything seemed like it was happening so fast. I just felt so - so out of control. Oh." Hermione groaned and flailed her fists in the air. "I was so incredibly mean and horrible to him. All those things I said. I really hurt him, I know. I wonder if he'll forgive me."

"Hermione, you know, I really think he'll just remember how the evening ended."

"Really?" Hermione looked at Harry anxiously.

"Really, Hermione," said Harry with certainty. "Trust me."

They walked in silence for a while longer. The squid had now decided to poke its head a little further above the water. Hermione and Harry were soon approaching the castle again. Harry wondered whether Hermione was going to make yet another turn when she said very quietly:

"I wonder what will happen now."

Harry looked at his friend with continued surprise. "What will happen now?" he repeated. "But Hermione, obviously you and Ron are in love."

"I know," said Hermione, making a fist again, "but, Harry, what's going to happen to us, the three of us. I mean - the three of us were friends together - are friends," she added quickly as Harry looked alarmed.

"Well, you won't stop being friends with me, will you?"

"No, of course not, Harry. It's just - it's bound to be different. If Ron and I start a different kind of relationship, then things are bound to change between the three of us."

"All people change, Hermione."

"No, Harry." Hermione stopped walking and turned around to face him. There were tears in her eyes. "Stop being so noble all the time. Be angry with us!"

"I'm not angry with you or Ron, Hermione," Harry replied with a quiet conviction. "I'm happy for you. Maybe you don't want things to change. But they already have. You can't pretend that kiss didn't happen. You can't pretend you don't love him. And if you do, it will make things much, much worse for all of us, believe me."

Harry and Hermione saw movement out of the corner of their eyes. Both turned to look at the castle and saw that Ron was no longer in his bed asleep. He was walking very tentatively through the grounds toward them.

Hermione turned back to look at Harry, reached up, and gently kissed him on the cheek. "You really are a great wizard, Harry Potter," she said. "And a good friend." She squeezed his hand and then turned away to walk toward Ron.

Ron continued to walk toward them but his steps seemed to grow even slower as saw Hermione and then Harry move toward him.

But Hermione half-walked, half-trotted toward Ron as if she had made up her mind about something. Harry half-expected Ron to turn on his heels and start running back to the castle but instead he just stood there frozen. Hermione reached Ron with a broad girlish smile on her face. She took his hands in hers and slowly looked up at him. "I'm sorry, Ron," she said, without hesitation. "I said a lot of things I didn't really mean last night. The truth is I love you."

As Harry moved closer to Ron, he could see dull amazement written across his features. He tried to open his mouth to reply but only made a gurgling sound that reminded Harry of a frightened toad.

Hermione did not seem to notice. She put her arms around Ron and snuggled her face in his chest.

Ron stood there like a mummy for a moment. Harry, who was standing behind Hermione, made an anxious grabbing motion with his arms. Slowly, Ron closed his arms around Hermione. He now looked completely stunned.

Harry watched his two friends hold each other for a moment and then, when it seemed like they weren't going to move out from the hug any time soon, he cleared his throat and said awkwardly:

"Well, er, well, I, er, will j - just go on ahead then, shall I?"

Hermione looked across at Harry and smiled, her face still buried in Ron's robes. She didn't seem the least bit embarrassed to be holding Ron in front of him. "OK," she said.

Ron was apparently still incapable of speech so Harry slowly turned and began to walk back to the castle by himself.

But when he had nearly reached the door, he could not help pausing and looking back at his two friends who were now holding hands and talking. He found himself thinking back to the first day of school. It seemed like ages ago now when he, Ron, and Hermione had touched their paper cups together and vowed to get to the bottom of whatever was going on in the school, just like they always did. He had meant what he'd said to Hermione but as he walked through the castle door alone, he somehow couldn't help but feel a little lost.

***

Harry took it upon himself to go to the owlery and send a note to Hagrid apologizing for their absence in class, imploring him not to take any points from Gryffindor, and promising to explain it all to him over tea. Fortunately, they had no other lessons that morning as Harry doubted whether Ron and Hermione would have turned up for those either.

He went down to the Great Hall and found a seat next to Amanda, Dean, Fred, George, and Fred and George's friend Lee Jordan with whom they had apparently stayed in Hogsmeade the night before. Harry was very glad they had not found some way to stay in Gryffindor Tower and witness Ron and Hermione's kiss, but his relief was short-lived. The news about the kiss had traveled fast and Fred and George were eager for information when he walked in.

"Is it true, Harry?" asked Fred.

"Fancy Ickle Ronnikins," said George. "His first kiss."

"Have you seen them this morning?" asked Fred.

"No," Harry lied.

"They weren't in Care of Magical Creatures," said Dean unhelpfully. "Come to think of it - " He looked at Harry quizzically but stopped talking when Harry shot him a venomous glance.

"The one snog wasn't enough, I guess," said Lee.

But Fred wasn't paying much attention to him. He had stood up from his seat. Harry followed his gaze and saw Ron and Hermione walking into the Great Hall, hand in hand. Ron seemed to be bending over so that no one would notice him but Hermione did not seem particularly concerned. Not, that was, until Fred, George, Lee, and Dean broke into an enthusiastic round of applause.

Harry immediately stood up, took his wand out of his pocket, and looked menacingly at the others. They stopped clapping.

"All right, Harry, all right. Just take it easy," said Fred.

"This place definitely needs lightening up again," said George, to which Fred nodded.

Ron and Hermione took seats across from Harry and reluctantly let go of each other's hands so they could eat. Neither said anything at first but after a time Amanda and Dean got involved in an animated discussion about the exact nature of Binns' prior relationship to Henrietta Handsdowne, and Fred and George started talking to Lee about a joint marketing scheme between the twins' joke shop and Lee's new tarantula breeding farm. Hermione quickly swallowed a bite of pork pie and leaned over to talk to Harry.

"Listen, Harry," she said, elbowing Ron in the hip, who quickly sprang to attention. Harry noticed that they started to hold hands right away again. "We just want you to know that we hope you won't feel, well, awkward or anything because of this."

Ron nodded eagerly. "It'll be just like old times, mate. The three of us will go around and do everything together. Well, maybe not everything - " he added unnecessarily.

"What Ron means," Hermione went on before Harry could interject, "is that we don't want you to feel like we're, well, abandoning you or anything."

"We - " Ron began.

"Look." Harry put his glass down on the table a little harder than he had intended. He wasn't sure what made him feel more disturbed, the fact that Hermione and Ron seemed obsessed about the effect their relationship might have on him or that two individuals who had spent most of the last five-and-a-half years at loggerheads were now speaking in tandem. "I told you already I don't mind if you're going out. I'm happy," he said slowly as if talking to two small children. "I - don't - want - any - more - rows."

Hermione continued to look uncertain but Ron took his hand away from Hermione's and began eating again as if the matter were closed.

"By the way," he said. "You missed a rotten party last night. The ghost orchestra was awful. 'Xpect you got a lot of work done, didn't you? Wish I had," he added though Harry doubted he wished anything of the sort.

"Oh, I don't think Harry got very much work done last night," said a voice to their left.

Harry turned around to notice that Fred had moved away from the conversation about the size of Lee's new tarantulas and was listening to their every word.

"He wasn't doing much studying at all when we were up there," said George, a horribly evil twinkle in his eye. "He seemed a bit preoccupied."

"With what?" asked Ron.

"With whom, more like," replied George.

Harry felt a horrible sensation in the pit of his stomach as he became aware that Amanda, Dean, Fred, George, and Lee had all now abandoned their conversations and were hanging on every word.

"I won't mention any names," said Fred, "but she has red curly hair and we've known her rather a long time."

Hermione and Amanda gave sudden quick gasps but managed to cover them before Harry noticed.

"Ginny?" said Ron between bites of roast potatoes. He shook his head dismissively. "Harry doesn't fancy her," he said with conviction. "Of course, she used to have that crush thing on him but she's over that now," he explained. "I had a good talking to her about it a couple of summers ago." He smiled, clearly pleased with himself.

Harry looked up at Hermione but found she seemed to have become very interested in the texture of her mushy peas.

There was a strange silence for a moment. Then Amanda excused herself and quickly took her plates to the other end of the kitchen, where they were received by a house elf who looked as if he had just been given an early Christmas present. Hermione quickly followed, muttering something about needing to post an owl. Ron looked between his food and her with a torn expression on his face.

Harry had nearly finished eating also and considered leaving when Hedwig fluttered down to the table in front of him with another official-looking Hogwarts letter in her beak.

"Not Snape again," said Ron.

Harry took the envelope and opened it carefully, not quite sure what was going to come exploding out of it this time. He found a thick parchment containing a short letter composed in elegant handwriting:

Dear Mr. Potter,

The time has come for us to begin our extended lessons in Defense Against the Dark Arts, which I understand Professor Dumbledore discussed with you at the beginning of term. I see from your schedule that you do not have any other obligations this afternoon at 4 o'clock. I would like you to meet me then on the small field adjacent to the Quidditch pitch.

Sincerely,

A. Nevins

The parchment was signed with both the red Hogwarts seal and another imprinted seal under Nevins' name. Harry studied the seal carefully. A wizened-looking wizard who reminded Harry of Dumbledore held up a wand which was emitting sparks. The wizard moved back and forth as if searching carefully for something, causing the very texture of the parchment itself to change as it did so. All around the imprint of the wizard in a circle were written the words:

ORDER OF MERLIN, SECOND CLASS

Harry looked at the seal with interest for a moment. He knew of only three other people who had received the Order of Merlin: Dumbledore, who had received the Order of Merlin, First Class; Wormtail, who had received the Order of Merlin, Second Class for confronting Sirius; and Gilderoy Lockhart, who never ceased reminding people that he had received the Order of Merlin, Third Class. Harry knew that the Order of Merlin was not given out lightly. Nearly everyone in the wizarding world knew of the awards Dumbledore, Wormtail, and Lockhart had received. But Harry had never before known that Nevins had received the award, too. Dumbledore hadn't told him, nor had Nevins himself. He wondered why.

"He didn't give you much notice, did he?" said Ron, who was now looking at the letter that Harry had let fall thoughtfully to the table.

"I suppose he wants to keep me on my toes," replied Harry. "I wonder why he didn't start the lessons before now."

Ron shrugged.

Just then, Hermione walked back into the hall, a little breathless.

"I've just seen Hagrid," she explained. "He wants to know if we can come for tea at 3:30. I said yes."

"I've only just heard I've got to take Defense Against the Dark Arts lessons at 4," replied Harry. "Can't he make it tomorrow?"

Hermione looked a little anxious. "I don't think so, Harry. I think we'd better go today."

"He's not mad at us, is he?" Ron asked.

"Well," said Hermione hesitantly. "Not exactly but I still think we ought to go. Even if it's just for a short while, Harry," she added to him.

Ron and Harry shrugged their agreement and the three of them picked up their plates and left the Great Hall. Ron and Hermione started holding hands again and hurried a little faster out of the hall as Fred and George broke into another round of applause on their retreat.

***

Ginny sat in the bathroom, humming a tune from the Weird Sisters that kept finding its way into minor key. She was interrupted by a loud tapping sound on the outer door. She thought of ignoring it but the tapping grew more insistent. Feeling slightly curious, Ginny got up and moved toward the door. She pushed it opened and jumped back startled as a tawny owl quickly dropped a white envelope into her hand and then flapped its wings hurriedly and took off down the corridor and out of an open window.

With curiosity, Ginny took the envelope and opened it, taking care to move back into the bathroom as she did so. She read a short hastily scrawled letter.

Ginny,

I just heard at lunch. You were with Harry last night? Where are you, anyway? Well, you have to tell me all about it. I'll be busy the rest of the day but maybe we can meet up tonight.

Hermione

Ginny frowned as soon as she had finished reading the letter. An angry flush grew in her cheeks as she tore it up. She was about to throw it in the toilet when she thought better of it and stuffed the remains of the letter into her pockets. Feeling this was an unsatisfactory conclusion to her frustrations, Ginny pounded a fist on the door of one of the stalls. She then sighed and decided that since she was on her feet, she had better start making her way to Potions. Maybe the excitement of another afternoon wondering whether her head would accidentally transfigure into a mushroom would take her mind off things.

She left the bathroom and walked briskly down to the Potions dungeon. As she got nearer, the corridors started to fill up with the fourth-year Slytherins and Gryffindors. She heard someone call her name but decided to ignore her. She wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone, but then she heard her name again and turned around to see Amanda running down the corridor toward her, panting slightly, her cheeks full of color.

"Ginny," she said. "Where have you been? I've been looking for you ever since lunch."

"Oh, around," replied Ginny vacantly.

"Ginny, what's wrong?" asked Amanda. "You look like you've been crying."

"It's nothing." Ginny turned to start walking into the Potions dungeon.

"Ginny, wait," said Amanda.

Ginny stopped walking and turned to look at her roommate.

"I - I'm sorry about what Catherine and I did yesterday. It was a bad idea to try and force that Hufflepuff boy on you. And I heard that you and Harry were together last night. I guess I was wrong about that, too."

Ginny suddenly found herself feeling a little better. "You weren't wrong," she smiled wanly. "He's never going to fancy me. I know that now. I think it's best if I just try to be his friend."

Amanda looked a little confused but then went on. "Ginny, I - I've been really worried about you lately." She looked around at the bustling students and drew Ginny into a corner of the hallway just past the classroom door. She lowered her voice and said: "We used to be quite close but I feel like you're slipping away now. If it's about Harry, I'm sorry."

Ginny looked back at her guilelessly. "We always do our homework together and we sleep in the same room."

Amanda frowned. "That's not what I mean, Ginny. You've become so withdrawn this year. It's not like you. If there's something wrong, maybe we can talk."

Ginny looked at Amanda for a moment. She considered very seriously telling her friend about the nightmares but she wasn't sure how to begin.

"If it makes you feel better," Amanda went on. "My evening didn't go very well either."

Ginny frowned. "I thought I saw you with your new boyfriend this morning."

Amanda snorted. "You saw the end."

Ginny suddenly smiled and took hold of Amanda's arm. "We should definitely get together and do something. Remember when we went Christmas shopping in Hogsmeade for the first time our third year?" Her face brightened at the memory. "And the look on Catherine's face when you bought that horrible bright orange dress?"

"It wasn't horrible!" Amanda insisted, but she was smiling, too. "Hey," she said, her face lighting up. "We should go to Hogsmeade together in December, just the two of us. I think Catherine will be busy with her boyfriend." She frowned a little.

"OK," Ginny smiled again and she and Amanda walked together into class. She found herself spending the first few minutes of the lesson imagining that she had gone to the dance with the Hufflepuff boy after all. She imagined his tall handsome face, slowly becoming less nervous as Ginny led him confidently around the dance floor, smiling in encouragement. Maybe she should go and talk to him, get to know him. Amanda and Catherine were right. She couldn't wait around for Harry forever.

Maybe then the nightmares would stop.

***

Hagrid poured four cups of tea and frowned down at Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

"I didn't say nothing to no one, o' course," he said. "Sure yeh had a good reason, but all the same." He looked down at them expectantly.

Harry wasn't sure if he should be the one to say something. Then Ron slowly took hold of Hermione's hand.

Hagrid looked down at them curiously.

Ron cleared his throat and a deep red began to suffuse his cheeks. "Er, well, Hagrid, H - H - Hermione and I...." He broke off and looked a little hesitantly at Hermione.

Hermione smiled confidently and drew his hand closer to hers. " - are going out," she finished, smiling.

Harry couldn't help smiling himself as a boyish grin broke over Ron's face. Hagrid gave a triumphant yell which Harry was sure would blow the roof off the top of his cottage and Fang responded with an alarmed bark. Ron's grin did not fade even when Hagrid pulled him and Hermione into a bone-crushing hug and decided to celebrate by offering them some of his infamous treacle fudge.

"Always knew yeh'd end up together," said Hagrid beaming, apparently having forgotten all about the missed class. "Said so to Fang years ago. Mind yeh take good care o' her now." He wagged a finger at Ron.

Ron nodded a little stupidly, the grin not leaving his face.

Hagrid kept smiling as he looked at Ron and Hermione holding hands. His smile faded slightly when he turned to Harry who was studying his treacle fudge warily.

"Never mind now, Harry," he said. "There's plenty o' time left fer yeh."

Harry shrugged.

Hagrid mock-threatened the three of them with a detention if Ron and Hermione didn't tell him the full account of their strange transition from friendship to love. They both contradicted each other with the details but seemed in too good a mood to let this spill over into an argument. The hut shook on several occasions as Hagrid let up occasional shouts.

Finally, Harry said:

"Er, Hagrid, I hope you don't mind if I go. Only, I've got to meet Professor Nevins for extra Defense lessons."

"Sure, sure, off with yeh, then," replied Hagrid, still smiling. "Say, er, Harry?" he said again as Harry was about to walk out of the door. "Yeh've been having extra lessons now?"

"This is the first one, actually."

Hagrid seemed to frown for a moment. "Ever get to talkin' with, er, Professor Nevins?"

Harry regarded Hagrid curiously. "Just in class. Why?"

Harry was certain it was his imagination but for a moment he thought he saw a flash of fear move over Hagrid's features but then he smiled again.

"Oh, it's nothin'," he assured Harry. "Off with yeh then. He won' like it if yeh late."

Somewhat reluctantly, Harry left the cabin and made his way toward the Quidditch pitch.

After he had left, Hagrid smiled at Hermione and Ron again.

"Well, yeh two." He shook his head. "Imagine that." He sighed. "If yeh don' mind now, I suppose I'd better be dealin' with these cabbage patches again; somethin' keeps comin' in the night and eatin' 'em all up. Dunno what it is, yet."

Ron stood up followed by a slightly reluctant Hermione.

"S - so about the class," Ron started nervously.

Hagrid made a sound like a neighing Hippogriff and waved his hand dismissively. "'S not every day yeh fall in love. Mind yeh, don' let it happen again."

"We won't," chorused Ron and Hermione.

"Good, now off with yeh."

Ron made toward the door but Hermione did not move. She suddenly looked a little anxious.

"Hagrid," she said. "I wonder if I could talk to you about something."

Hagrid looked a little surprised and checked his watch again.

"Please," said Hermione before Hagrid could protest that he had something to do. "It's very important. I'm worried about Harry."

***

Harry trotted quickly to the small field next to the Quidditch pitch which he had once used for practice when Slytherin had booked the regular field. He found Nevins sitting calmly on an incongruous swivel chair which Harry suspected he had conjured.

"Hello, Harry," said Nevins quietly as he approached.

"I'm not late, am I?" asked Harry, a little anxiously.

"I don't think so," said Nevins as if the matter did not concern him very much. He drew himself up a little and looked at Harry with a characteristically unreadable expression.

"Do you why you are here, Harry?"

"Yes," replied Harry. "Professor Dumbledore said that I was to receive extra Defense lessons."

"I have known Professor Dumbledore for a long time, Harry. He has told me that you have already developed exceptional defense skills. Of course, I wanted to see this for myself. That is why I have waited so long to begin our extra lessons."

Harry nodded. Professor Nevins seemed much different from the teacher who had kept the class on their toes all semester with a mixture of inscrutability and arrogance. He was speaking to Harry now with an unusual candor. Harry realized for the first time that Nevins had never called him by his first name during class but he was using it now as if they were good friends. He had the sudden impression Nevins realized Harry would not need any encouragement to pay attention in these extra lessons. Harry knew full well the power of the Dark Arts and Harry had no doubt that Nevins knew it, too.

"I am pleased to say," Nevins went on, "that Dumbledore was right. You will indeed make an excellent Auror, if that is what you choose to do. But I'm afraid," he added, his expression darkening slightly, "that we are not here because of your future career. I'm afraid we are here to make sure you remain alive to have one."

Harry found himself taking a step backwards. He felt a sudden twinge of dislike at Nevins. He, Harry, had spent a good part of the year trying to forget about the threat that hung over him the moment he left the friendly confines of Hogwarts and the surrounding area. He had convinced himself that he should trust Dumbledore and Sirius, that they had everything under control, that the threat was, perhaps, not so great after all. And here was Nevins reminding him of the danger he still faced. As if he needed reminding.

But Harry just nodded. He did not want to discuss the matter with Nevins. He certainly did not want to show him that he was afraid. Dumbledore wanted him to take the extra lessons and he would trust Dumbledore.

Nevins took out his wand. "I think we'll start today with a relatively simple spell, learned by most Aurors, but usually not taught until after N.E.W.T level. I imagine you will be able to master it, however, not without some difficulty, of course," he added, seeming to regain for a moment some of his usual classroom demeanor, "but master nonetheless."

Harry nodded again.

Nevins looked at Harry gravely. "I have no doubt you know full well, Harry," he said, almost softly, "the danger of ambush. I fear it is unlikely that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named will simply send one or two Death Eaters after you. It is, I'm afraid, much more likely that he will send many of the Death Eaters at his disposal as he did when you and your godfather were attacked outside the forest. And you may not always have your Firebolt at the ready."

Harry had not realized Nevins would have known about Sirius. Dumbledore must trust him more than Harry realized. Harry continued to listen with renewed respect.

"This spell can give you both the element of surprise and effective positioning from which to form a counter-attack," Nevins explained. "Watch closely."

He pointed his wand at himself and cried: "Levitatus."

Harry stepped back in awed surprise as Nevins quickly flew thirty feet into the air, twisted and turned, and then landed about twenty yards away. He performed the spell again and put down gracefully on the ground just in front of Harry, smiling.

Harry felt an almost boyish enthusiasm spread within him that was difficult to restrain.

"That was wicked, professor!"

Nevins smiled. "And now your turn, Harry. Enunciate: Lev-i-tat-us."

Harry took a small step away from Nevins who retreated himself. He took out his wand and was ashamed to see his hand trembling slightly as his enthusiasm quickly turned to anxiousness. He clenched his fist and forced himself to calm down. He did not want Nevins to see that he was nervous about performing the spell. Nevins thought he performed well in Defense Against the Dark Arts and Harry was certain he did not want to give Nevins any cause to doubt him.

Harry took out his wand, pointed it at himself and cried:

"Levitatus!"

Harry swallowed his saliva as his feet left the ground and he rose high above Nevins who looked up at him. At first, he felt the pleasant sensation of weightlessness that sprang up whenever he flew on his Firebolt but after Harry had risen about ten feet in the air, he became uncomfortably aware that there was no broomstick under his feet now. He felt his movement gradually begin to slow and knew he had reached the apex of his flight. Then sky and earth seemed to suddenly melt together as he plunged fast to the ground. The world kept spinning around him until he felt something smash very uncomfortably into his right hip and realized that he had landed very awkwardly back on the field.

Harry tried to stand up but winced as his hip throbbed in protest. He looked up to see Nevins standing over him, a half-smile spreading over his lips. The hip throbbed again and Nevins' face started to twist like a mirror at a carnival as tears of pain sprang to Harry's eyes. He forced them back.

"Not bad, Harry," said Nevins. "Not bad at all. You made good height on that one, for a first attempt. Now, try to visualize when you say the spell. Imagine yourself as a bird flying in the sky, or flying on your broomstick," he added, pleased with himself at the idea. "Yes, Harry, imagine yourself flying on your Firebolt. That will help you to get more height."

Harry wasn't sure he wanted to get more height if he did not first learn how to control himself while he was in the air. But that was the last thing he wanted to tell Nevins. He just nodded to him, pointed his wand at himself and then closed his eyes and imagined himself flying high above the Quidditch pitch in a game, searching the ground below him for the golden snitch.

To Harry's horror, this visualization worked even better than he had feared. He flew into the sky like a rocket, flying higher than the trees and almost as high as the stands in the adjacent Quidditch pitch. He experienced again the same sensation of freedom that coursed through his body as he glided around the sky on his broomstick.

But this feeling was very short-lived indeed. He felt himself start to slow down and plunge horribly fast to the earth. He imagined the pain that would seer through his body as he landed hard on the ground. He willed himself to slow down, to stop tumbling, to gain some kind of control over his movement. For a moment, he steadied himself and found he was gliding down like a fly with his legs and arms outstretched. He looked down and saw Nevins looking back up at him. He wondered if the Defense teacher would cast a spell to slow his fall. For a moment, he thought he must do: Harry would be horribly hurt as soon as he hit the ground. Nevins would not want that, surely? Surely it would defeat the purpose of learning new Defense Against the Dark Arts spells if he was too badly hurt to use them? But Nevins stood on the ground impassively with his arms folded and his wand tucked back into his cloak. Almost immediately after he saw this, Harry felt himself tumbling again. Sky and earth churned together like yolk and white in an egg beater. Harry gritted his teeth and steeled himself against the pain of hitting the ground.

But no, he thought to himself suddenly. He would not resign to the pain. Nevins had landed upright and so could he. Harry realized he was still clutching his wand in his hand. Perhaps he could slow his fall. But no, he realized, remembering with dread his steady fall to the ground when Lucius Malfoy had stolen his Firebolt. He had not known any spells that could save him then and he still did not know any now. More out of desperation than hope, Harry stretched out his wand and pointed it in a steady horizontal direction. He did not use any spell but he suddenly felt his body begin to right itself, even if he was still traveling at a fast speed. He was now looking at the ground again. Keeping his wand steady, he moved his body to a vertical position and succeeded in landing feet first on the earth. Such was the hard impact, however, that Harry immediately fell into a rough heap, this time on his left hip. Both of his hips and ankles throbbed in pain and this time, the best Harry could do was sit up on the ground as Nevins walked over to him.

"I see you've learned how to control yourself in mid-air," he remarked casually. "In time you'll find that if you level yourself when you begin to fall, you'll be able to use your wand to cast defense spells against your attackers below."

Harry could not imagine how he would ever graduate to this level when he hardly felt able to stand on his own two feet.

Nevins stretched out a hand to pull him up. "You've made great progress. We'll spend the rest of the lesson learning something a little more subtle. I wouldn't want you to end up in the hospital wing after your first session."

But Harry did not take hold of Nevins' hand. Instead, he hoisted himself up painfully on his protesting ankles. "No," he said.

Nevins raised an eyebrow.

"I want to learn this spell and get it right - today," Harry said through gritted teeth.

Nevins didn't say anything for a moment, appearing to consider Harry's request. "Very well, Harry," he said finally.

They continued to practice for at least another hour. Each time, Harry flew higher into the sky and eventually further from his original position. And each time, the fear of pain forced him to concentrate hard to steady his fall until, at last, he landed with his own two feet on the ground, stumbled a little then, like a gymnast tumbling off a balance beam, steadied himself and did not fall.

Nevins jogged over to him, clapping. "Very good, Harry," he said. "Very good, indeed. You've exceeded my expectations. And now, I think we'd better end the lesson here. And I'm afraid you will have to go up to the hospital wing."

"I - don't - need - " Harry croaked in pain, unable to finish his sentence. Every bone in his body seemed to have landed on the ground at least once during the exercise and all of them stung.

"You are very brave," said Nevins, almost inaudibly. "Like your friend Ron. And your father."

Harry looked up at Nevins suddenly. "Professor Dumbledore said you knew my father?"

"Yes, Harry. I taught him as I am teaching you. I was Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts when your father was at school here. He, like you, showed exceptional defense skills."

"But I thought - Professor Dumbledore said you were an Auror?"

"I was. I left Hogwarts your father's sixth year to go into training as an Auror. I thought I could make a much greater contribution in the fight against You-Know-Who as an Auror than sitting in front of a classroom at Hogwarts. I completed my training and served as an Auror for many years. But as I told your friend Ron, I was in Ravenclaw, not Gryffindor. I always had a quick mind but you need more than a quick mind to be an Auror. You need bravery. And you are brave, Harry."

"But Professor Nevins," said Harry. "I'm sure you must have been brave. You received the Order of Merlin, Second Class. It said it on your note."

Nevins lips became very drawn. "I wish it didn't. The Order of Merlin comes with an unbreakable spell. It seals itself onto every letter written by the bearer to guard against," Nevins smiled ironically, "modesty."

"But why wouldn't you want people to know you received the Order of Merlin? Surely it's a great honor. You must have done something - "

Nevins' face grew very dark. "That's enough for today, Harry," he said sharply. "Now, please, get up to the hospital wing."

Harry wanted to open his mouth again but he could see that he had touched a nerve. Whatever it was, Nevins wasn't willing to discuss it, not to him. He nodded slowly and made his way stiffly across the lawn. Nevins made it clear he would walk Harry to the hospital wing himself. When they reached the hospital wing, Harry was slightly surprised when Professor Nevins told Madam Pomfrey that he had received some injuries while practicing Quidditch, and that Nevins had found him and helped him to the ward.

Harry did not seem to hear Madam Pomfrey as she fussed about his various wounds, complained that he had a broken right hip (which she mended with great ease), and that Quidditch would be the death of him sooner or later. He was thinking about his talk with Professor Nevins. Why had he seemed almost ashamed to receive the Order of Merlin? Was he a fraud, just like Lockhart and Wormtail? Harry was still not quite sure what to make of his Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, but somehow he felt this didn't ring true.

Finally, Madam Pomfrey told him with typical reluctance that he was free to go but that he must make sure to get plenty of rest. Harry had no intention of disobeying her this time. It was nearly time for dinner but Harry did not feel hungry. He made his way up to Gryffindor Tower. He wondered if Ron and Hermione were about and what they would think of his Dark Arts lesson and Nevins' strange secret.

But when Harry reached the common room he saw right away that he wouldn't be talking to either of them anytime soon. Ron lay curled up on the sofa, fast asleep. Hermione lay on top of him, also asleep, her unruly hair scattered across his chest. Both of his two friends wore smiles of contentment and serenity as if falling asleep in each other's arms was the most natural thing they had ever done. Harry wanted to feel happy for them: he felt as exhausted as they looked yet his face could not seem to curl in the same blissful manner. He tried to imagine what it would feel like to sleep on the sofa with Cho but somehow this thought made him feel hollow. Sighing, Harry walked up the stairs to his dormitory, got into bed, and fell quickly asleep. He did not wake again until the following morning.