Deer to Me

Chapter Twelve

"Lily, honey. You've been so quiet this morning," Mr. Evans said, looking at the rearview window. Lily was holding a blue jacket to her chest and watching the buildings fly by as the family drove her to King's Cross. "Something on your mind?"

"Just....thinking about school," she smiled at him. It wasn't a complete lie. A few thoughts swirling in her head had to do with school, or, more importantly, the Auror classes that she was beginning. The book she had to read over the past three weeks was full with some of the most complicated spells and potions that she'd ever seen. Thinking of Auror classes led her to think of the Slytherins, who were probably going to be more and more abrasive to her now that she was doing this.

She looked at Oliver who was ecstatic that he got to go past the barrier again. She was worried for her family, what if something happened to them while she was gone? What if the Dark Lord decided to go after them?

Then, there was the biggest thing on her mind. She looked down at the simple blue jacket in her hands that no longer smelled anything of James (she might have worn it a few times....or maybe everyday). He had invaded her every thought since she last saw him. His completely and utterly hurt expression and the way his eyes just mirrored his breaking heart. And the way that his lips felt on hers. And the way that she could just unlock her heart and talk to him for hours. And the way-

She let out a sigh of frustration. Once she got back to school and remembered just how much of a jackass he was, everything would be back to normal. She would give him his jacket back, laugh about how stupid she was to take it, and be sure not to look at him in the eyes because she might start crying.

Her father and brother were kind enough to offer to carry her bags to the station while she, Petunia, and her mother walked behind them. Lily was becoming visibly more nervous as they made their way towards Platform Nine and Ten. She slipped through the barrier with her father and brother and her mother and Petunia followed.

With a quick glance around the station, Lily felt safe that James had either not arrived or was already on the train. She turned to the rest of her family and gave them all hugs goodbye.

"So you'll be able to do magic when you get home next summer, Lily?" Oliver asked.

"Yes," she grinned. "I'll show you some good magic, all right?"

"Lily, darling, there is that charming boy, wasn't his name James?" Her mother cooed, looking towards the platform door. Lily turned and felt the pit of her stomach drop. James was there with his mother and father and Sirius, who Lily remembered was living with James now. James' mother made her smile because she was fussing over the two of them like a mother hen. She fiddled with James' hair and he ducked away from her hands.

James' father was giving the boys some wand movement instructions and making James smile. It wasn't a mean smile or even a big-headed one, but it was a nice smile that made Lily's stomach flip-flop.

"Lily, I'm going to take these bags to the compartment, all right?" Mr. Evans said, hoisting the bag onto his shoulder. "Come on, Oliver."

"Ok, Dad," Lily nodded, watching as Mr. and Mrs. Potter left their two sons to their devices. Sirius was the first to spot her and nudged James. He turned to catch her straight in the eyes and then looked down to what she was holding in her hands. He and Sirius made their way over to her and she met him halfway.

"Hi." Her voice was very soft like she was in a library.

"Hi." His voice was equally soft.

"Um, you left your jacket." She thrust it at him, not looking at him in the eye.

"I know."

She heard a disapproving click behind her. Lily turned to see Petunia with an upturned nose.

"So it's his jacket that you've been wearing every single day for the past three weeks." She looked at him and Lily wanted to crawl into a hole and die. After murdering Petunia, that was.

James couldn't respond to that and he just nodded dumbly. Sirius was snickering.

"Um, James. This is my sister, Petunia." She felt the blood rushing to her face.

"Hello," he smiled at her. Sirius looked at her and made a very loud sound.

"Oh, and his friend Sirius." Sirius, never one to be shy in front of a lady, booted James out of the way and made his presence known to Petunia.

"Such a lovely name," he grinned. "To fit a lovely woman."

Lily gaped at him. She loved her sister, but she was most certainly not lovely. She was rather horse-faced and boney. James knew that this was a line he used often and just sighed. Petunia seemed taken aback.

"Excuse me?" she sputtered. Sirius took her hand and was about to kiss it when he noticed the giant rock on her left finger.

"Sweet Merlin...." he whistled. Petunia snatched her hand away from Sirius and huffed away. Lily's parents and Oliver were coming back, and Oliver, seeing Lily with two guys, ran over to her.

"Hullo." He gave James a once over and noticed the jacket in his hands. Then he turned to Lily a slight smile on his face. Lily blushed even more and looked away/

"Is this your brother?" James asked.

"Yes." Lily put her hands on his shoulder. Somehow, leaving Oliver out in the open with James Potter in front was a very scary proposition.

"How old is he?" James asked.

"I'm nearly ten," Oliver said, proudly. "And I'm going to Hogwarts, too. Only Lily says I have to wait until I get my letter. But I'm convinced I'm a wizard."

"Are you?" James said, pulling out his wand. "Do you have one of these?" Oliver made a sound and looked like a kid in a candy store.

"Wow! Lily's doesn't look like that!" James bent down so that he was at Oliver's level.

"Yeah, every wand is different. Mine's mahogany. Wanna hold it?" Gently, Oliver held the wand and flapped it around a little bit.

"Neat," he said. Lily's parents cleared their throat behind them and Oliver handed the wand back to James. Lily followed him back to her parents and gave them kisses and hugs. Boarding the train, she walked down the hall, looking for an empty compartment when the door opened. Lily was half-afraid that it was Bellatrix, but it was Emmeline Vance, along with a few other Ravenclaws.

"Hullo Lily," Emmeline smiled. "I had some questions on the book. I was wondering if you would like to talk about it?"

"...Sure." Lily stepped inside and smiled at the Ravenclaws, all strangers to her. They were introduced one by one by Emmeline, but Lily couldn't possibly remember them all.

"Did you get a lot of this book?" Emmeline asked when the other girls had broken off into their own little huddle.

"Not really," Lily admitted. "But I don't think we're supposed to understand it, do you?"

"I hope not," Emmeline said. She gave Lily a piercing look. "Are you scared?"

"What?" Lily was caught off-guard, thinking about mahogany wands.

"Are you scared about becoming an Auror?"

"No," Lily shrugged. "I'm more scared for my family."

"I saw them," Emmeline nodded. "Muggles, right?"

"Yeah," Lily admitted.

"My mother's muggle-born."

"Really?"

"Yes. She said she always had a hard time in school because of it."

"It's no picnic," Lily laughed. Emmeline nodded and grinned.

"Lily?"

"Hm?"

"You know that we're the only two girls in the program, right?"

"Yes."

"I think we should stick together."

"I agree," Lily laughed. "It's us against all of those boys."

"Don't you know who's teaching the course?" Emmeline asked. Lily shook her head. "Frank Longbottom." She raised her eyebrows suggestively. "He's not too bad to look at, if you catch my meaning."

"No, I do," Lily smiled half-heartedly. She didn't think that she could possibly even think about another guy until she got James Potter off of her mind. Somehow he wouldn't leave her alone.

"Prongs, get that stupid grin off of your face," Sirius growled at him. James looked at him and sighed.

"So what exactly happened?" Remus inquired, opening up a chocolate frog.

"Lily handed him the jacket and then Lily's sister, rather hot-"

"She was not," James snapped out of his daydream to give him a disgusted look. "She was horse- faced and boney."

"Yeah, but she had a nice figure," Sirius shrugged. James made a retching sound and clung to his jacket.

"I'd rather take my Lily, thank you."

"So what did she say?" Remus pressed. "Lily's sister."

"Well she told Prongs here that Lily'd been wearing his jacket every day," Sirius snorted. James sighed and buried his nose into the folds of the jacket.

"It still smells like her," he grinned. Sirius took off his own jacket and pelted James with it.

"I hope we don't have to deal with this for the rest of the year," he groaned. James threw his jacket back and gave him a serious look.

"You know, this means that if I want to stay in her good graces, then I've got to stop being such a prick."

"Should we begin praying for a miracle, then?" Remus grinned. James threw him a dirty look.

"Actually...I was thinking along the lines of you two helping me out a bit." He looked at Sirius and then clarified, "Or maybe just Remus."

"What now?" Remus asked.

"Well, I want you to remind me, at least when Lily's around, when I'm being a jerk."

"And I should do this because...?"

"Because you're my friend," James pleaded. Remus sighed.

"Will you stop tricking Lily in the forest?"

James looked at him oddly. "But then how will I know whether or not I'm doing the right thing?"

"James, I refuse to help you unless you stop spying on her," Remus told him frankly. James glared at him and then moved to the other side where Sirius was waiting.

"Will you help me?" he asked. Sirius shrugged.

"I don't know how much of a help I'm going to be, I'm usually the big jerk there with you, mate."

"So what am I supposed to do?" James frowned.

"Maybe, you should begin from the inside and figure out just what is right and wrong for yourself," Remus said.

"Inside out, huh?" James rubbed his chin in thought. And he realized that he needed to shave. "I just might do that."

"And then you'll realize that spying on her is a wrong thing to do," Remus finished.

James thought about it for a moment and then shook his head. "Nah."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Hopeless."