Deer to Me

Chapter Eleven

Lily peered into the kitchen. There were trays and trays of cooling cookies all over the kitchen. She looked down at her partner-in-crime, who's blonde head was covered with a black hat to make him stand out less. They winked at each other and snuck into the kitchen, each heading towards a different end where their favorite variety was currently cooling. They both took a furtive glance around and reached out their hands.

"Hold it right there," A cold voice came from the doorframe. Lily and her accomplice winced at the same time and straightened up, putting their most innocent faces forwards.

"Hello Mum!" Lily cheered.

"I know what you two are doing." Mrs. Evans held a spatula in her hand and had the glare that Lily herself saved only for James.

"Mum, it's just one cookie!" Lily's second cried. "You have about fifty thousand more!"

"That's not the point, Oliver," Mrs. Evans began scooping a cooled pan into a basket. "These are for the bazaar tomorrow."

"Mummy, do I get to help this year?" Oliver cried, bouncing up and down.

"You get to be my special helper," Mrs. Evans said, ambiguously. Lily snorted. That meant that Oliver was going to be messenger boy.

"What did you sign me up for this year, Mum?" Lily asked, pulling Oliver into her lap, lovingly.

"Something easy, don't worry. I know this is your vacation." Mrs. Evans gave her daughter a smiling glance. "You will be at the face painting booth."

"Hey Lily," Oliver said, leaning back against her . "When can you show me magic?"

"After next May," Lily rolled her eyes, but still kept a smile on her face. "I've told you fifty times."

"Oh. Well, when am I going to get my letter?" Oliver asked, excitement in his voice.

"You may or may not get your letter," Lily reminded him. "But you'll get it in two July's if you do."

"Will you teach me?"

"Teach you what?"

"If I have magic, will you teach me?"

"That's what the professors are for," Lily reminded him. Oliver gave her a worried look.

"But I don't know any spells."

"Neither does anyone else. There are a lot of people just like you who come from all muggle families-"

"What is going on in here!?" Petunia hissed, sticking her bony head in the kitchen. "I have Vernon over, so stop talking about your abnormal-"

"Petunia!" Mrs. Evans's eyes grew large. "That is completely uncalled for."

She gave a quick and unbelievable apology. "Keep your speech to yourself." Petunia sneered and left the kitchen. Oliver turned back to Lily and frowned.

"I'm glad she's getting married. I was afraid she was going to be an old maid and I would be stuck with her until I left."

Lily's mother was part of a Ladies' Club that hosted a non-profit bazaar in the neighborhood to raise money to buy presents for the less fortunate children in the area for Christmas. Lily had always helped out, and it was something she looked forward to every December.

So she found herself at seven in the morning setting up her face paints and brushes and cups of water. She put her jacket around her tighter and frowned. She wished she could have created a little fire to keep her warm, or at least charmed her coat to keep her warm. The sky was completely clear, but the sun was not warming her up at all.

After painting flowers and such on some children's faces for a few hours, Lily peered out of her booth to see that the bazaar was in full swing. People were milling all around and she could see lots of bags in people's hands. Going back to sit down, she pulled out An Introduction to Aurors (a different book cover adorned the front, of course), and began reading it. One of the requirements was to completely cover the entire book during the Christmas holidays.

She heard someone walk inside and sit down and went for her brush, without looking up. "What do you want paint....ed..." she asked, trailing off.

"I want ‘James Potter is Sexy', or a JP and an LE with a little heart," came the cocky reply. James Potter was leaning on her little table with his cheek bared to her and an expectant look on his face, Sirius sniggering to the right of him.

"What...how....you....?" She couldn't voice the right question. He turned his head so that he was facing her properly and answered her questions one by one.

"Well, I wanted to see you, first of all. Second, I flew here. Don't worry, I used my invisibility cloak with Padfoot here. And I don't know what you were going to ask with the ‘you,'" he grinned. "But I'm making a donation, so you have to paint my cheek." To make a point, he threw a galleon into the jar. Lily glared at him and fished it out, giving it back to him.

"This is a muggle event," she reminded him. James nodded in understanding and pulled out a few notes. He threw them all into the jar in front of her and grinned, resuming his position of baring his cheek to her.

"What do you think, Padfoot?"

"I rather like, ‘James Potter is Sexy,'" he said, looking around. James nodded and looked to Lily who made a sound and dipped her brush in the paint. She paused for a moment and then a grin spread on her face. She took James's face in her hand and began painting, slowly and meticulously. James heart beat faster when her face came close and he could feel her breath on his face.

He heard snickering from Sirius and saw the delight in Lily's eyes and was suddenly worried for what was on his cheek. Lily sat back and dipped her paintbrush into the murky water. James looked to Sirius who was in all-out guffaws of laughter.

"What?!" James demanded. "Give me that mirror, Lily!"

"Nope," Lily snatched it away from his reach and laughed when he grabbed for it.

"Lily Shea! What on Earth did you write on that poor boy's face!" Lily frowned and peered out of her booth where her mother was standing. She beckoned James over to her and took his face in her hands.

"I suppose you are JP."

"Yes ma'am."

"I'm sure you're not a ‘smarmy git,'" she patted him on the shoulder. Lily muttered something like ‘that's debatable'. Mrs. Evans gave Lily a glare and turned back to James. "You don't have to donate anything, young man."

"Please," Sirius stood up, "Lily was only telling the truth. James here is a-" He chuckled "smarmy git."

"James?" Mrs. Evans gave Lily a sideways glance and then her eyes lit up. "So you're James Potter! Lily's always talking about you." Lily's face flushed bright red and her mouth dropped, gaping wordlessly.

"Nothing good, I imagine," he grinned, pleased as pie that Lily had been telling her mother about him.

"No, but I can see now that Lily was clearly overreacting," Mrs. Evans beamed. "You're such a charming young man."

"Why thank you, Mrs. Evans." Sirius rolled his eyes. James had begun to use the ‘I'm-so- charming-that-you-have-to-love-me' voice.

"But I don't think I can take you seriously until you wipe that paint off of your face." She went to go get a washcloth, but James, after looking around, whipped out his wand and pointed at his cheek.

"Scourgify," he said, simply and then put his wand away. Mrs. Evans was amazed.

"But-But you won't get in trouble?" she asked.

"Oh no, ma'am," James said. "I'm already 17."

"Really, now?" she said. "Fascinating."

"Yes, Mum, shouldn't you be going?" Lily urged. Mrs. Evans grinned at her.

"Actually, I just came to relieve you. Cynthia Rimes' daughter is here. So you can take your charming friends around and show them the bazaar."

"But-"

"But you'll do it." Mrs. Evans left no room for argument.

"I can certainly tell where Lily gets her charming temper from," James interjected, lightly.

"No, actually, she gets it from her father," Mrs. Evans beamed, walking away.

"So honestly, what are you doing here, Potter?" Lily asked as they walked around the bazaar. Sirius kept wanting to stop and examine the muggle things so they were by themselves.

"Well, Sirius moved in with me and we had all ready terrorized my family so we figured we'd come see what you were up to."

"He moved in with you?" Lily asked. "Why?"

"He ran away." James expression was stony. "His parents and their pure-blood nonsense again."

"Oh," Lily nodded as Sirius observed an alarm clock. "Poor guy."

"He's happier anyways," James said. "But anyways, we wanted to see what you were up to."

"I'm...flattered..." Lily said, giving him a strained smile. James seemed a bit put out, but cleared his throat.

"So what exactly is this?" He motioned to the grand selling and buying going on around them.

"My mum is part of a Ladies' club that does this annual bazaar to raise money for needy children around the town. I've always helped out," Lily said.

"Do you always paint mean things on people's cheeks?" He gave her a mock glare. Lily blushed and shook her head.

"Only special pricks, Potter."

"I'm touched."

Lily found it incredibly easy to talk with James Potter when he wasn't surrounded by other people and being a complete prick. Sirius had disappeared sometime during their conversation and so it was just the two of them walking around Lily's home town as the day progressed into afternoon and then evening.

One of the things that surprised Lily the most was the fact that James was so knowledgeable of muggles. She finally asked him about it and he explained that he lived in a muggle town called Godric's Hollow.

"But...I thought you were pure-blood," Lily said. James gave a little laugh and shook his head.

"I've got some muggle born and half-blood and all of that," James said. "But I do know that I can trace my lineage all the way to Godric Gryffindor."

"Really?" Lily smiled at him. "That's amazing."

"Yeah, I had no question on where I was going to be sorted."

"I wasn't sure that I was going to be sorted at all," Lily grinned sheepishly. "I thought that they'd check their list again and then look at me and say, ‘Sorry, we made a mistake. We meant another Lily Evans' and send me home."

This seemed to amuse James because he was laughing very heartily. She took some offense to this; she thought it was a very valid thought and it had worried her the entire train ride to Hogwarts.

"What's so funny?"

"Lily, nobody could mistake you for someone else, trust me," James said. "You're one of a kind."

To this, Lily blushed and they walked on in companionable silence. He turned to look at her when she shivered a little.

"Cold?" James asked.

"Yes," Lily looked back at him. "I loathe the cold."

"So I've noticed." James muttered. He looked down to the very warm jacket (his mum had put a Warming Charm on it to keep her Jamie warm) and then shrugged it off, handing it to her. She looked at it and shook her head.

"You'll be cold, won't you?"

"Nah, when you play Quidditch as much as I do, you tend to become immune to the cold." He offered it again and she took it, putting it on. Out of the corner of his eye, James saw her press her nose to the fold and smile a little bit. His heart leapt into his throat.

"It's getting dark," he observed, clearing his throat.

"You are so observant," Lily chortled back. She held the jacket closer to her and looked down at the road. "You're in the Auror Program, aren't you?"

"Yeah, defeating dark wizards runs in the family," he laughed. "Started reading the book yet?"

"Breezed through the first few chapters. I'm not so sure I want to do it anymore," Lily admitted. "I mean, if I loose it in front of a whole bunch of Slytherins, how am I even going to compare to the Dark Lord?"

James was silent for a little bit. "Why do you let them get to you?" he asked quietly.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because it's true?" Lily looked at him. He stopped her.

"How is it true?" he said.

"You know, I am muggle born. And maybe I'm not as good as they are-"

"Says who?"

"I'm not," Lily shrugged, shuffling down the sidewalk once more. Down the road was a playground with some nice swings, and she fancied a sit from walking around all day.

"Yes you are," James caught up with her. "You're twenty times the witch that they are."

"Not something to be broadcasting in the middle of a muggle neighborhood, Potter," Lily said through gritted teeth as an elderly couple walked by. James looked at them and then back to Lily.

"Not as if they can hear anything anyways, huh?" he nudged her. She glared at him.

"That was mean."

He retracted. "Sorry." He sat down next to Lily on the swing set and watched her rock back and forth for a few minutes. She sighed and looked up at the sky and James cleared his throat, looking down at the grass. "Is that the only reason why they get to you?" he asked. "Because you think that they're better than you are?"

"Not just that." Lily was very interested in the stars above them.

"Well?"

"I guess..." She trailed off and turned to look at him. "I guess that I'm terrified that if I make them mad that they'll come after my family. I feel like I'm fighting a war on two fronts. Defending myself, and defending the homeland."

"Have you talked with Dumbledore about this?" James asked. Lily gave him a wry look.

"Dumbledore? The headmaster? Sorry, James, but I'm sure that he doesn't really care about me. I mean, I'm just another muggle-born with a family, right?"

"You don't know him that well, do you?" he laughed.

"Well, seeing as I'm not the descendent of the founder of Hogwarts, no," Lily snapped.

James played with the swing chains. "Dumbledore doesn't care who you are. He treats everyone the same. Even if you're Godric Gryffindor's heir or if you're some slimy greaseball."

"James," Lily sighed, exasperated. "You really do need to stop being mean to that poor boy."

"I do nothing unless provoked!" James said, holding his hands in the air.

Lily gave him a dry look. "Does the fact that he ‘exists' count as provocation?"

"Yes."

She rolled her eyes. "You are so immature."

"Lily, you've got to understand something about my family. Ever since Godric, we've had this sort of malice against all Dark Arts. Someone in my family has been involved in the downfall of every single Dark Wizard in history."

"So?"

"So, we're kinda programed to hate any sort of Dark Wizard."

"That doesn't explain why you torment poor Severus." James felt nauseated. Poor Severus?

"Because he's obviously on the path to being a Dark Wizard. He knows more spells than some Death Eaters, I'd imagine."

"Well, obviously," Lily rolled her eyes. "You and Sirius attack the poor guy so much that he had to learn them."

"This was before he came to Hogwarts," James said.

"Do you think that you're better than the Slytherins who make fun of me just because I'm a muggle-born?" Lily asked. James paused for a moment, but obviously didn't make the connection.

"No, because you can't change who you were born as."

"But he can't change himself, either. Or maybe he doesn't want to change."

"Well then it's his own damn fault and he can deal with the consequences," James nodded. Lily shook her head.

"This is a losing argument, isn't it?"

"Yup," James said.

"So let's move on to something else."

"Ok." He sat sideways on the swing and looked at her. "How many blokes have you kissed?"

Lily almost fell out of her swing. She was blushing madly at him and sputtered for a moment until she finally answered, "That is none of your business, James Potter!"

"I'll tell you how many girls I've kissed."

"I know how many girls you've kissed," Lily hissed, wishing that the blush would leave her face.

"Keeping count?"

"No, there are 27 girls in our year? Minus the Slytherins, that's 5, so 22, and of course, myself, that's 21. Give or take about ten or fifteen under and older classmen-"

"Whoa whoa." James held up his hand. "I think you're confusing me with Sirius!"

"You both share the same girls right?" She had pursed her lips together. James shook his head.

"Try about 8," James grinned. "And five of them were girls from Godric's Hollow."

"Man-whore," she commented. James was stunned.

"That's not a lot, you know."

"Compared to the company you keep, I'll bet." Lily laughed and James laughed as well.

"Do you know, that every time I want to ask him something after nine o'clock, he gets all upset and tells me that he's with a girl."

Lily shivered, "That's disgusting."

"Tell me about it," James said.

"Oh please." She also sat sideways on the swing so that she could talk to him better. "I'm sure you've done it many times too."

James thought for a moment and seemed to be counting. "Well, if you want to talk the actual deed of ‘doing it', then I'd say 3 times."

"Three times?"

"Yes, but with the same girl. She was a muggle I had a fling with last summer."

"Really?" Lily said.

"You know, I do have needs and I can't wait around forever for you." James folded his arms in front of him and smiled. Even though she had red hair and green eyes...but James wasn't going to tell Lily that. "So what about you? I think we were on kissing, correct."

"If you must know James," Lily's voice was very matter-of-fact, "I have been kissed once. But it was a simple, innocent kiss."

James humphed, "Innocent? How so?"

Lily clicked her tongue inside her mouth and pursed her lips. She spoke as if the she was telling James that the ocean was blue. "Well, obviously, there was no tongue."

To this, James turned into a laughing pile of goo on the ground.

"What?!" Lily cried, blushing. "It's not that funny!"

"Oh, it was just the way you said it!" James cackled. He put his hands on his waist and gave Lily a very accurate representation herself. "It was innocent, there was no tongue. Like that's a gauge to tell whether or not something's innocent!" Lily sputtered and frowned. "Oh, Lily, that was great!"

"I'm so glad you enjoyed it." James looked up at her smiled.

"Come on, Lily. I'm sorry." He sat back on the swing and looked up into the stars. "Do you want to start heading back?"

"Sure," Lily said, standing up. James followed and moved to put his arm around her in a hug and she jumped back suddenly.

"What?" he said, concerned. "I'm trying to make amends."

She mumbled something that James didn't quite catch.

"Huh?"

"Fine, fine." He put his arm around her shoulders and she jumped again.

"I'm not going to strangle you or anything-" To that, Lily walked a few steps out of his embrace and gave him an odd look.

"Lily, jeez!"

"I just....don't like people touching my neck," she said. "It's a phobia I have."

A light turned on above James' head. He nodded. "So if....I do this?" He reached for her neck and to his complete and utter surprise, she uttered a shriek of terror and ran five steps ahead of him.

"Don't do that!" she hissed.

"Ok ok." He ran up to catch her and walked by her side for a few minutes. Then with a glance over to her, stretched out his arms and yawned, then dove straight for her neck. The same squeal of fright came from his studious Lily and she ran down the street, James hot on her heels.

They ran all the way back to Lily's house, where James finally caught her and pinned her onto the swing chair hands on either side of his neck. Lily was whimpering and James was laughing.

"Ok, ok," he panted, from running and laughing so hard. "I'm done."

In retaliation, Lily reached up and put her hands around James' neck. He stared at her blankly and then down at her hands. She frowned at him and crouched back on one side of the swing, her knees acting as a guard against James.

"So let's see," James leaned over to rest on her knees . "I have learned today that you have had one" he snorted "very innocent kiss, you have an evil older sister and adorable younger brother, you hate peanut butter, and that you have a phobia of people touching your neck."

"And I have learned," Lily squeaked. "That you are a mean and hateful person!" As the words came out of her mouth, she could not believe it. She was flirting with James Potter!

"But you already knew that," James smiled. "So are you going to trust me again?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"What if I give you Marauder's Sacred Honor I won't ever touch your neck again?"

"No."

"What if I cross my heart?" He put his head on top of his hands on her knees so that he was face to face with her.

"No," she said very quietly. Although, she didn't really have to speak very loudly because he was right in front of her.

"Hope to die?" He moved in closer and put his hand on her cheek.

"No."

"Stick a needle in my eye?" he finished.

"Please, could you? I've always wanted to see someone-" James closed the space in-between them (there wasn't much) and pressed his lips to hers. For a moment, they stayed like that until he moved and she pushed him away.

"James, stop." She pushed him away a little. James moved back to leaning on her knees.

"What? Don't worry, it was innocent. There was-"

"I don't know if I want this," she blurted out. James suddenly felt very cold.

"W-What?" he said.

"I don't know if I want this." She repeated with much more conviction.

"Why not?" James said. He thought that he was on a roll! He'd gotten more information tonight than he'd ever gotten with Prongs.

"Honestly?"

"Yes, of course," he nodded.

"Because you are an egotistical, self-centered, mean, hateful person and I don't think that I could, in good conscience be your girlfriend under those circumstances."

"Wow, not that honest," James laughed, but it was half-hearted.

"Sorry." Lily looked down at her hands.

"So....you want me to change for you?"

"No, James. You just aren't.....aren't what I want in a boyfriend." She sat up and walked to the door. "I'm really.....James, I'm sorry."

"The truth hurts, I suppose." His voice was very hollow.

"G-Goodnight James," she said, walking inside the door and closing it with a soft click. He heard a rustling in the bushes and a soft pop.

"Ouch." Sirius came out from the bushes. James looked at his hands and felt his eyes burn. He thought that he was getting better.

"Come on, Padfoot. Maybe....maybe it isn't meant to be?" Sirius sat down on the swing and put his hand on his shoulder.

"No," James looked determined. "This is war, Padfoot. I'm going to get her to go out with me if I have to change my entire personality."

"That's not a good sign, Prongs." Sirius pointed out to him. "Maybe we should discuss this with Moony-"

"No," James stood up. "I've got a plan. But I'm going to need your help. And Moony's too."

"Prongs, she's....mate, she's not going to come around," Sirius said.

"No, I think she's got some kind of feeling for me," James stared at the door realizing something and smiling a little. "Deep down."

"Why do you say that?" Sirius asked. James turned to look at him with a satisfied smile.

"She's still got my jacket."