All's Fair

Chapter Eight

Draco finally managed to calm himself down enough to get back onto his seat, and noticed that Hermione and Ron were still standing there, trying (unsuccessfully) to hide their confusion.

"Blaise? Pansy? Are you able to breathe down there?"

"I, hee, think so," replied Blaise.

He took a deep breath, and then sat next to Draco, Pansy joining them a moment later.

"Parkinson, you haven't told me if you'll take me up on the offer yet."

Ron opened his mouth to agree with Hermione, then realised that all he had been doing for a while was echoing her. He decided to wait until he had something better to say before speaking again.

"I'm very sorry, Granger, but I don't think so."

"Hey, what's wrong with Hermione?" asked Ron indignantly, making his very helpful input to the conversation.

"Well I'm sure that there's nothing wrong with her, but frankly I would much rather be challenged by you... Ron," said Pansy, putting emphasis on his name.

The redhead spluttered, not quite understanding what was going on but feeling that it would be a good time to get very embarrassed.

"Don't worry, Hermione. You don't need to be left out. I will accept your challenge in Pansy's stead. I'm sure that you'd prefer it like that anyway," said Blaise smoothly.

"Prefer?"

"But of course... I have something that I'm pretty sure that Pansy doesn't." Blaise paused for a moment. "You don't, do you, Pansy?"

"Hey!" shrieked the blonde in response, hitting her friend over the head with a toast rack.

"I suppose -ow, there's a lump forming on my head you vicious hermaphrodite--that the whole hitting thing was to avoid answering the question. Pansy, I never knew!"

Draco slapped Pansy's hand away as she reached for more table implements with which she could assault her very offensive friend.

"This is not," he muttered to them, "the image that we want those Gryffindors to have of our house. Blaise, leave Pansy's questionable gender to later. We must keep up the aloof and in control Slytherin persona."

"Okay, Draco."

"Sorry, Draco."

"Good. Weasley, Granger, Pansy and Blaise respectively accept your challenges."

"We look forward to beating you," said Hermione, attempting to be calm and collected, but in truth sounding rather like a frog.

"Whatever you want to think, Hermione. But I'm sure the pleasure will be all mine," replied Blaise with a smirk. "But you may go... for now."

"Are you giving us permission to leave?"

"Yes. In fact, we would love you to leave," said Pansy sweetly in response to Ron's indignant question.

"You can't order us about!" the redhead all but yelled.

"So you want to stay and have breakfast with us?"

"Wh- No! Hermione, we're leaving! Now!"

Ron grabbed his girlfriend's hand and stormed out of the Great Hall.

Most of the Slytherins that had managed to calm themselves down enough to witness the incident promptly fell off their chairs laughing again.

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"Why did I have to be the one to do this?" whined Draco as Pansy and Blaise propelled him into Care of Magical Creatures.

"Because you were the one that started this whole game, not us."

"But you were really happy about that this morning."

"Doesn't mean that we're going to do this particular bit of dirty work for you," grinned Blaise.

Draco was silent for a moment.

"Why did we have to do this spell?"

"Because it's the most effective one. Oh, and we get to know what underwear they wear as well."

"But I don't want to know what underwear they like!"

"Not even Potter's?" asked Pansy slyly.

"I don't really care what underwear he wears."

"Really?" questioned Blaise disbelievingly.

"The only thing about Harry's underwear that I care about is that he removes it for me!"

Blaise and Pansy sniggled. Draco realised that his statement had come out a little more loudly than he had intended it to.

"Right, I think we should get going. You know what order to remove stuff in?"

"Yes, mother."

Draco knew the order. He had been lectured on it constantly for the last three hours.

When Pansy had first mentioned the spell, he had been very excited. After all, who would not be excited about learning a spell that would allow you to look under someone's clothes and remove them layer by layer? The best thing was that the three target Gryffindors would not even notice.

Yes, it was a wonderful spell. But there was one rather large problem.

Draco really did not want to see what Weasley or Granger kept under their robes, as enticing as the prospects probably appeared to Blaise and Pansy.

Draco closed his eyes and braced himself as Pansy cast the spell.

When he opened them, nothing appeared different at first.

Then he looked at Ron, and found that if he squinted, he could actually see through the redhead's cloak. The worn jumper that the boy was wearing vanished as soon as Draco willed it to.

Right, he thought, I'll start with the Weasel, then do Granger. I can save the best for last...

Weasley really does have awful taste in clothes. A maroon jumper with a yellow T-shirt? Please.

And they're in such a state, I can hardly imagine what his underwear-

Oh.

Weasley doesn't wear underwear. What a 'pleasant' surprise.

Well, I suppose I can now officially abolish the rumour that red hair means red....

Oh Merlin, what am I thinking?

Will never tell anyone about what I have just seen.

Ever.

And possibly remove my eyes with a spoon once this is all over...

Draco shook his head a couple of times to get rid of the awful image that he was sure was now permanently imprinted into his memory.

He made quick work disrobing Granger, noting that the Gryffindor know-it-all seemed to favour rather interesting green lingerie over the granny pants that she had always been labelled as wearing.

Well, at least Blaise would be interested.

Draco was now able to turn to the last Gryffindor. Harry was staring avidly at his favourite teacher as he raved on about his great love for today's obscure yet horrific monster.

"Draco," said a voice from far off, "are you done? Do I say the wind spell yet?"

"No! Wait until I tell you!" he snapped.

"Okay, keep your hair on!"

Slightly paranoid about his hair after the flower incident, Draco quickly checked that he was still keeping his hair on. Once this was done, he returned to the task in hand.

Draco willed away Harry's untasteful tasteful jumper (In case I'm ever seen with him in public. Not that I'm thinking of the two of us dating or anything), then took a deep breath and continued with his T-shirt, trousers and boxers.

He then spent a moment reminding himself that if he ran over to the unsuspecting boy and shagged the living daylights out of him, all kinds of trouble would surely follow.

"Well then, Harry. I think I owe you some congratulations," murmured Draco as his gaze strayed from a chest firmly toned by Quidditch to the boy's lower regions. Which so happened to be of extremely impressive proportions.

"Come on Draco, you can ogle Potter when we blow all of their robes off. We already took their wands, it's not like they can do anything about it."

"Yeah, other people want to enjoy the scenery as well!"

Draco was silent, lost in a rather pleasant daydream.

"Draco!" snapped Pansy, and prodded his arm hard.

"Okay, fine," sighed Draco. "Go ahead."

"Yay," squealed the girl. "Ventus!"

A strong gust of wind immediately blew through the class, making almost everyone's robes flutter.

The exception to this was, of course, the three unlucky Gryffindors. The catches that held their robes on had been undone by Blaise, and with nothing to hold them on, the robes were immediately blown away... right into the Forbidden Forest.

There was a moment of stunned silence as the class stared in shock at their naked schoolmates.

Suddenly, a shaking Hermione raised an arm and pointed directly at Blaise. "You!" she shrieked.

"I'm sorry, Hermione, I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Oh you definitely know."

"I assure you that I don't. Why would I want to see you naked?" he asked innocently, but the look in his eyes gave him away to pretty much everyone... except Hermione.

The girl turned angrily to look at the class. "What are you looking at?" she all but screamed.

Nobody answered.

"Can somebody transfigure me some clothes, please?"

Still silence.

"Harry, make them do something to help!"

Harry made no reply. He was staring at Draco.

Draco thought that he could see the raven-haired boy's lower lip trembling.

This was not what he had wanted to happen.

He had wanted Harry to be embarrassed, yes. And he did not really care how Granger and Weasley felt.

But he never wanted to hurt Harry. Not like he appeared to have done.

Just as Draco was taking out his wand to make the unfortunate boy a cloak, Harry whipped around and headed off towards the forest, evidently in search of his lost clothes.

Draco looked back at the rest of the class. Apart from a large amount of staring taking place, nothing much was happening. He took off after Harry's receding back.

Draco caught up with Harry as the boy was about to enter the shade of the trees.

"Look, Harry, I'll get your cloak."

"Why should you?" came the angry response. "You think I'll forgive you for humiliating me and my friends if you get my cloak?"

"Well..."

"How could you do this to me?"

"Hey," said Draco slightly indignantly, "you embarrassed me first."

"Yeah, but it didn't ruin your reputation or anything. It was just a bit of fun..." Harry broke off with a sniffle, then turned to head into the forest.

"Accio cloaks!" Draco caught the flying garments and grabbed Harry's arm. It was freezing. Draco felt (if it was possible) worse.

Harry took them wordlessly, and slipped his on.

"Harry," said Draco, "I, uh," he blushed slightly, then tried again. "Trust me, you have nothing to be embarrassed about."

Harry stared at him hard for a few moments. Draco thought that he caught the hint of a smile before the teenager turned to walk away.