Switched Shoes

Switched Shoes

Chapter Two: I'm you, and you're me

The onlookers were quite obviously thinking that Parkinson and Hermione had gone insane. Why did Hermione suddenly scream at Parkinson? Wasn't it supposed to be the Slytherin that was angry? And most of all, why did they act so, well, strange? They were staring at their own hands as if they just realized they had them. And just what was with the unfortunate thing? What was unfortunate?

All of a sudden Hermione (really Parkinson) whirled around to face them. "What are you looking at," she hissed. "Go away!"

The onlookers looked some more. That was completely un-Hermione! But then again, when the top student was angry (oh yes, they've seen her angry), she was very unpredictable indeed.

Talking to each other in soft voices and wondering what in the world happened, the other students walked off to their own classes and left the two students to themselves.

Making sure no one was nearby, Hermione walked over to Parkinson and gawked. It felt very strange to be staring at her own face.

Parkinson smirked. "Finally noticing how ugly you are, Mudblood?" Amazing! Parkinson sounded exactly like her!

Hermione glared at her. "Shut up! At least I don't have your pug nose!"

"What?! Drakey said it was very cute!" It was Parkinson's turn to glare. Parkinson touched her nose; then remembered it wasn't her nose but Hermione's.

Hermione snorted and then began to laugh outright. "Drakey? Said it was cute? Haha! He must have been drunk at that time! Your nose wouldn't be cute on anything other than a pug!" Even if she heard Parkinson say Malfoy's nickname a thousand times (which Parkinson did), she would still double over with laughter. Drakey was an extremely cute nickname, but it didn't suit Malfoy.

"Humph! Well, I don't need a filthy thing's opinion. My nose is cute; you're just jealous!"

Hermione rolled her eyes. Forget about arguing otherwise. It was evident Parkinson had enough energy to argue with her all day about a nose.

Suddenly Parkinson was serious. "What happened? Why am I in your body? Why are you in my body?"

Hermione shrugged. "How would I know?"

Parkinson's eyes narrowed. "You planned this, didn't you?" she accused. "You planned this all out!"

"Excuse me, you think I want to be in your body? I'd much rather be my own smart self, thank you."

"I don't believe you," Parkinson said coldly, but some of the suspicion had left her. Granger wouldn't lie to me, would she?

"Fine. Don't believe me. But I want to know why too. I'm going to Dumbledore!"

"That old idiot? He doesn't know anything!"

Hermione didn't answer and began to walk away.

"Fine! I'm going too! Even if he is an old idiot, he might know the reason for this mess!"

* * *

Moments later, they were at the stone gargoyle.

"That's so ugly," Parkinson murmured, with her arms crossed across her chest.

Hermione rolled her eyes. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately. But really, Parkinson just has to remark on the appearance of everything, doesn't she!

"Well? Open it!"

"Haven't you been up here before?" Hermione asked scornfully. "We need to know the password or else it won't move."

"Then what's the point of coming up here?" Parkinson snorted. "Do I have to wait until the batty fool arrives or finds out we're here?"

"We. Besides, we can take a guess."

"Real smart, Granger. We can spend all eternity trying to guess the stupid password if Dumbledore doesn't come."

"'Course he'll come," Hermione said absently. "Um, lemon drops?"

"Lemon drops? What the hell is that?"

"Some Muggle candy. Erm, how about Drooble's Best Blowing Gum?"

The stone gargoyle remained still. It's eyes glared at them and Hermione shivered. Alive or not, it sure scared the heck out of her with it's malevolent eyes!

"For a top student, you sure don't act very smart! Just move, already!" Parkinson kicked the gargoyle hard and then howled with pain. She hopped on one leg, wincing.

Hermione sniggered, but stopped when the gargoyle moved suddenly. Parkinson stopped hopping and stared at it incredulously.

"Was that the password?" She asked in wonder as she followed Hermione in.

Hermione knocked on the door that led to the headmaster's office. "Professor?"

"Come in, Miss Granger."

Hermione turned the doorknob and stepped into the office. Professor Dumbledore was sitting at his desk and looked up when they came in.

"Ah, Miss Granger. Here with Miss Parkinson?"

Hermione's jaw dropped. "W--what? How do you know I'm Hermione and not Parkinson?"

Dumbledore smiled placidly. "I try to know as much as I can about the pupils."

"Um yes, Professor," Hermione said. "I have, um, something to ask you. See, something weird happened today and we, um, want to know why."

"And what just happened?"

"I thought you said you knew!" Parkinson blurted. "Whatever. We switched bodies for some reason and now I want to change back!"

Hermione sent Parkinson a look that said, Have some manners, will you. "Do you think you can tell us why it happened?"

Dumbledore sighed. "I do not know everything, Miss Granger. I do not know why such a thing happened."

"And they call you wise! Ha!"

Hermione scowled. "Do you know anything about it? Has it happened to other people before?"

"From what I know, this has never happened to others before. This is a first."

"Do you know . . . a cure?"

Parkinson snorted. "If it has never happened before, then how can there be a cure?" Nevertheless, Parkinson was hopeful.

"No, Miss Granger. I will have to research this extraordinary accident. However, both of you, you must not keep this a secret. You must act like the person you're now."

Parkinson groaned. "I can't stay in this bloody body forever! I just can't!"

"Oh, shut up. Well, thanks anyway Professor. We'll just go now." Hermione looked disappointed but walked out of the office. Parkinson tagged after her.

"Isn't this great, Granger. I'm you, and you're me."

"Don't think I'm happy," Hermione snapped. "Like I want to be snooty you! Hey, where are you going! Gryffindor dormitories are this way!"

"Why would I want to go to Gryffindor dormitories?"

"Because, you prat," Hermione explained impatiently, "we're supposed to act like each other! Remember?"

"Oh, please. I'm not going to miss this chance to get back at you. Imagine what I can do to you!" Parkinson sighed dreamily. "Missing homework, detention, it's a dream come true!"

I thought you thought it's a disaster. "You wouldn't!"

Parkinson smirked at her. "Oh yes I would!" She grinned wickedly, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. "Imagine all the possibilities!"

Hermione narrowed her eyes. "Imagine what I can do to you! It's a dream come true for me too! I can sully your reputation and make you be nice to Gryffindors! I can make you date Neville!" Ha, that's a good one. Poor Neville, though. "I can make you do well in everything and stay away from Malfoy! Imagine all the wonderful possibilities!"

Parkinson's face paled. Good grades? Nicey nice Pansy? NEVILLE? And worst of all, no more Drakey? Her face paled even more.

Hermione folded her arms and stuck up her chin. "Just because I'm a Gryffindor doesn't mean I don't play rough! Unless you do what Dumbledore says we should do!"

That was the final straw. Parkinson gave in. "Fine! We'll meet during lunch and you can tell me everything! Happy?"

"Yup. Very." Hermione gasped. "We missed part of Potions! We need to get going quick!" She looked frantic and grabbed Parkinson's arm. "Hurry!"

"Argh! Let go! I'm not getting in trouble anyway! I'm a Slytherin!"

"Not now you aren't! Hurry up!" The two of them raced down to the cold dungeons and arrived breathless. They barged in and the class raised their heads to look at the late arrivals.

"S-sorry, Professor," Hermione gasped. "We needed to see Dumbledore about something."

Professor Snape nodded, his cold eyes sweeping over Parkinson. "Five points off Gryffindor for tardiness, Granger."

Hermione swallowed, and walked over to the empty seat next to Harry. Partly there, she stopped and remembered. She wasn't Hermione anymore. She was Parkinson. She couldn't sit next to Harry or people will get suspicious.

This is harder than I thought, Hermione thought. Who does Parkinson usually sit next to? Of course. She sat next to Millicent Bulstrode, Blaise Zabini, and several other girls Hermione didn't know the names of. Legs feeling like jelly because of her new seat, she walked over, sat in the seat, and smiled weakly at her new "friends".

Blaise leaned over and her golden hair swished onto Hermione's desk. "Where were you, Pansy? Were you really with Dumbledore and Mudblood? Were you snogging?"

Hermione was revolted. Why in the world would she choose snogging over education? "Yes, Za--Blaise. We needed to discuss, uh, something important."

Blaise arched a perfectly plucked eyebrow. "Really? What important something?"

"Um, er, I suggested that maybe we should have, er, another Yule ball!" Hermione felt herself nodding and felt proud of her brilliant lie.

"That's perfect!" One of the girls sitting there whispered. "That's a brilliant suggestion!"

"But what about Granger? Don't tell me she was there to suggest the same thing?" Damn. Blaise wasn't as stupid as Hermione thought to be.

"Uh . . . she, um, wanted to know if she could take an extra class." And then for good measure, she added, "The bookworm."

Is this going to be for the rest of the year? Insulting myself? What fun is that?

"All right." Blaise leaned back in her seat. "That's a great suggestion though, Pansy. You'll be going with Draco, of course." Blaise yawned. "I don't know what you see in him, Pansy. He's just another guy." Despite Blaise's words, Hermione could detect envy.

Hmmmmm, did Zabini and Parkinson fight over him and did Parkinson win? Or did Zabini give him up? Two seconds later, Nah.

"What ingredients go into the Sleeping Potion?" Snape asked the class, his eyes searching for a victim. His eyes landed on Neville, who instantly turned white.

"Longbottom?"

"Um, er, beetle eyes?" Neville guessed nervously.

"Beetle eyes? No, Longbottom!" Snape snapped. "There's a reason you buy textbooks, you fool!" Neville whimpered and Hermione couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Hermione's hand shot up, completely forgetting she was Parkinson and not herself.

The entire class looked at her in surprise, particularly her new friends. Even Snape looked surprised. He was so surprised he didn't notice that Parkinson's (who's Hermione) hand wasn't up.

"Miss Parkinson?"

"The ingredients that go into the Sleeping Potion--" Hermione faltered. She had looked at Parkinson and saw the glare directed at her. She remembered that she was in Parkinson's body; therefore she should be acting like Parkinson. "Um, I forgot." She smacked herself mentally for making such a stupid mistake.

"Ten points to Slytherin for a good try," Snape said. His eyes suddenly snapped to Parkinson, who was looking at her nails.

"And you, Granger? No answer this time?" Snape sneered at her. Parkinson didn't look up, but instead examined her nails more closely.

* * *

Parkinson groaned as she trudged to her new seat. She looked at Ron and Harry scathingly.

"Hermione!" Ron said. "Where were you? Why were you late today?"

Parkinson ignored him.

"Hermione?" Harry asked. "We were worried! You're never late!"

"I was seeing McGonagall about something," Parkinson answered stiffly.

"About what?" Ron asked curiously.

Nosy git, Parkinson thought.

"None of your business! It was something private."

"Oh." Harry and Ron looked at each other in surprise.

Parkinson leaned back in her chair and looked over to where Hermione was sitting. Merlin, why do I have to be stuck with these dorks? She thought crossly. Why does the Mudblood sit with them anyway?

She held up Hermione's nails and cringed in disgust. Now they were her nails. The nails had been chewed and needed a serious manicure. Well, they would get one soon if they were Parkinson's nails.

Dimly aware of the question Snape had just asked, she snickered when she heard that buffoon of a person, Longbottom, stammer. It was even more of an enjoyment when she heard Snape call him a fool.

She snapped to attention when out of the corner of her eye, she saw the Granger girl raising her hand.

What is she doing? Parkinson thought furiously. She's supposed to be me. Her hand shouldn't be up!

Parkinson turned around and gave Granger the fiercest glare she had. Ha! So much for keeping everything a secret! I'm doing a better job than her!

Granger must have seen her, because she said she forgot. Parkinson almost sighed in relief--until Snape turned on her.

"And you, Granger? No answer this time?" He sneered at her.

Ignoring him, she examined the cursed nails. I'm going to need to get a manicure soon, she thought.

Harry nudged Parkinson. "Hermione!"

"What?" She snapped at him. "Can't you see I'm busy?"

"B-but . . ."

"Five points off Gryffindor for yelling at a fellow student," Snape said silkily.

"Shut it," Parkinson said to him. The Gryffindors gaped at her. "You're just taking points off because you hate us. Besides, don't you hate Potter?" She had forgotten to call Harry by his given name.

"Another fifteen points off."

Parkinson ignored the warning signs and went on. "And is there something wrong with me not having an answer? I don't see anybody else with their hand up, so why are you picking on me? And why the hell are you waving your arms like that?" The second question was directed at Hermione, who had been waving her arms frantically to get Parkinson's attention.

"Detention, Granger." Snape's voice was dangerously quiet. "Another word out of you and you'll have a week of detention."

Parkinson froze.

"Shit!" She was about to say some curse words but stopped. Never mind, I'm not doing a better job than her. I totally got detention for her!

"Ten points off for foul language, Granger." Looking up, Parkinson noticed he looked mildly surprised.

"Sorry," she mumbled, trying to make up for her monstrous mistakes. I'm going to be in big trouble at lunch . . . especially if Granger's going to look the way she is now.

Hermione's expression suggested big trouble. Very big trouble.