- Rating:
- PG
- House:
- The Dark Arts
- Characters:
- Sirius Black
- Genres:
- Drama Drama
- Era:
- Multiple Eras
- Spoilers:
- Philosopher's Stone Prizoner of Azkaban
- Stats:
-
Published: 08/23/2005Updated: 08/23/2005Words: 568Chapters: 1Hits: 161
Soul
Snuffles7
- Story Summary:
- They said that he was crazy. That is, he was insane. That was because he sat in Azkaban for twelve years and acted normal; and yet he was deemed crazy. They said that he killed twelve Muggles and one wizard. They said that all he did was laugh when he was caught. They said that he ratted out his two best friends and caused their deaths. They said he felt no remorse. They said that he never shed a tear. They said that he couldn’t love. They said that the dementors couldn’t take his soul because he didn’t have one. Definate PoA spoilers with a slight hint of OotP. One-shot fic.
- Posted:
- 08/23/2005
- Hits:
- 161
- Author's Note:
- This is dedicated to the memory of Sirius Black, James Potter, and Lily Potter.
Soul
They said that he was crazy. That is, he was insane. That was because he sat in Azkaban for twelve years and acted normal; and yet he was deemed crazy. They said that he killed twelve Muggles and one wizard. They said that all he did was laugh when he was caught. They said that he ratted out his two best friends and caused their deaths. They said he felt no remorse. They said that he never shed a tear. They said that he couldn't love. They said that the dementors couldn't take his soul because he didn't have one.
But Sirius Black did feel. He had a soul. He could prove it to the world. If only they could see him on those days that sparked memories of a life that he never fully got to live; a life that James and Lily Potter could never live again.
Every July 31st, he sat down on his cot and picked up a small rock. With this rock, he would right the words Dear Harry on the wall of his cell. He wrote his godchild a letter every year, wishing him a happy birthday, telling him that he was innocent, that he would be back for him soon, and that he was sorry.
Every September 2nd, he laid down on his cot and closed his eyes. He tried to picture Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in his mind's eye. He would see all of his dear friends: Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, James Potter, and Lily Evans. They were all smiling at him. It was as if they were waiting for him to come and join them, though he knew that he never could.
These days were usually happy for Sirius. He loved celebrating things like Harry's birthday, or going back to Hogwarts, or any of the other numerous things that stood out in his mind. Sirius even celebrated the day that the Marauders pulled their first prank on Severus Snape. This usually brought the dementors on though, and then Sirius would be really miserable again.
The dementors got bits of his soul every day, except one: October 31st.
Every Halloween, Sirius would lie on his cot and go back to October 31st, 1981. He had been there so many times now that he could hear James telling Lily to hide as he fought Voldemort, and Lily screaming as she protected Harry. He heard their voices, even as he screamed. He knew that he would never be able to hear those voices again. Ever. James and Lily would never be coming back. Anger would swell in him as he thought of Peter Pettigrew laughing over their deaths. Love for his lost friends flowed through his veins. The thought of Harry living without his parents, with Muggles that hated him, and not knowing the truth caused him to cry out in pain. Then, Sirius Black would take his head in his hands and whisper softly: I'm so sorry James. I'm so sorry Lilly. I'm so sorry Harry. Then he would cry.
The Mad, Soulless, Betrayer, Voldemort-Supporter, Murderer Sirius Black would cry himself to sleep every Halloween night.
No one ever saw him do it. Even if they did they wouldn't care. They all thought that he was crazy. They said that he had no soul. But he did. He could prove it to them if they could only see.
Author notes: Please review! This is a very important fic to me, as I always pictured Sirius like this.