The Last Days of War

I am scared. I have never been more afraid than I am now. Of coarse I have experienced fear but this kind of fear was a on a different level. The level it is on now is beyond recognition. I Harry Potter, the boy who lived, leader of Dumbledore's Army, the supposed hope of the light is deathly afraid. No, I am not afraid to die, but I am afraid for those who I am fighting for; my friends, my family, my love, everyone. I cannot bare the fact that if I fail to defeat Voldemort than everything and everyone will be gone. There is no doubt in my mind that Voldemort, if I fail, will take over the world. The whole world... Can you image that? I have, in many vivid nightmares. In these dreams I see things no one should ever have to see...It was horrible...Corpses lined the streets, the few survivors running for their lives, people screaming out in pain, babies crying for their mothers who will never come back...I cannot bare that weight on my shoulders. I cannot! I am on the brink of going insane...but I can not go over the edge. The fate of the world lays with me...Oh how I wish that this never happened. I wish I could be a normal 18 year old, but I can't. I have to be the bloody savoir of the world! I can't take it!... No, but I can't loose it not when we are so close. The last battle is vastly approaching. I feel it in my bones...

The war has not gone well so far for either side. We have lost many good people and the other side; they have lost 'people', if you can call them that. Even with our losses we still have the upper hand. Though we are matched in numbers we are fighting with our heart and soul. They are just fighting. We have had our share of victories and defeats but we are close now, so very close.

The battle today was perhaps the most intense so far. It lasted for several hours but we have suffered tremendously. At role call 200 did not respond. Everyone of those brave men and women gave their lives so we could live on. I shall not let them die in vain! When roll was over I went into my tent and cried. Yes, I admit I cried. I cried for those who are gone...Fred, Dean, Justin, Arthur, Remis this list goes on and on. Hermione came to check on me and discovered me. As always I pretended that nothing was wrong but she knows better. She comes closer and looks into my eyes. Why must she always do that? When she forces me to look into her eyes...I feel like killing myself rite then and there. Her eyes show everything we have been going threw. Those once bright beautiful brown eyes now dark with sadness and despair, I can't take that. She gazes into my eyes and I feel her eyes piercing threw my very soul; she alone has that effect on me. She can read my darkest fears with a gaze and I hate that! She breaks the gaze and looks the ground. I see her eyes tearing. I take her into my arms as so many other times and comfort her. Sometimes I forget that I am not the only one feeling these emotions.

Today is the day, the day that I will fulfill my destiny or die trying. I wake from my light sleep and grab my cloak and wand. I exit my tent and walk towards another. I stop outside the opening and take a deep breath. Should I really do this? I shake my head clear and step into the tent. Thankfully she is still asleep. I walk over to the cot and gaze down at her. I take my hand and brush it across her soft skin, perhaps for the last time. I remove my hand and reach into the breast pocket of my cloak pulling out the letter I wrote last night. I smooth out the crumpled paper and place it down next to her wand, where she is sure to find it. I lean down and give her one last kiss before I leave. I stop at the opening and get one last look before rushing out into the misty morning.