The First Marauder

Remus tiptoed towards the common room, the Fat Lady snoozing gently in her frame. He placed the small bag of ripped robes on the floor and crept right up to the painting.

“Psst,” he whispered gently. “Hello?”

“Hm?” the Fat Lady grunted groggily. “What is it?”

“Crumple-Horned Snorkack.” He murmured a little louder.

“Hmm.” She assented, the portrait swinging forward much slower than normal. Remus collected his bag, climbing silently through the hole and continued his careful trip to his dormitory. Turning towards the boy’s dormitory, he crept across the common room, blessing the thick carpet to muffle his accusing footsteps.

“Where have you been, Remus?” the voice almost sent Remus’ body up into the dorms above. He jumped and turned so quickly it made his post transformation blurry head spin and jolt.

“James, you scared the Flubberworms out of me.” Remus breathed, holding his chest and placing the bag on the floor. James didn’t look at him from his seat on the windowsill, he merely continued to stare absently through the rain-splattered window, his chin resting on his arms loosely curled around his knees.

“What are you doing up this early?” Remus asked, walking across to the nearest chair and sitting gingerly on the arm, the gash in his side throbbing threateningly. He would have to check that in with Madam Pomfrey at a more decent hour.

“I could ask you the same question, though I doubt I will get a truthful answer!” James exclaimed, his eyes darting to his friend before returning to the window. His voice was cold and hard, sending an icy shiver down Remus’ spine.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Remus asked, his voice clearly showing the pain flaring through him. James chanced another glance at him, seeing his tired face framed by sandy brown hair full of the utmost confusion.

“James?” Remus asked, his voice wavering dangerously.

“Have you even been to bed, Remus?” James looked at him fully, the hurt also clear in his own face, his usually sparkling hazel eyes that shone permanently with laughter looking as hollow as a Dementor’s hood. Remus paused a moment too long before smiling broadly.

“Of course I have, you dozy prat.” He muttered, trying to hide his guilt with a laugh that was a little too rehearsed.

“You sleep in the forest now? What, among the Centaurs?”

“What?” Remus desperately tried to keep his voice upbeat, but his breathing was rapidly quickening as his thumping heart threatened to burst from his chest into a bloody mess on the floor, just like he had left that bird his jaws had clamped into merely hours before.

“I watched you come back, Remus. Returning from behind that nutty tree Dumbledore planted last year just before we arrived.” James looked back to the window, staring at the steadily lightening ground. The Whomping Willow swayed gently in the breeze, before a branch soared through the air at an alarming rate, birds flying off into the air with a screeching call.

“You… you’ve been spying on me, James?” Remus struggled to look innocent, but again his heart was thumping and tears were forming behind his stinging eyes. This couldn’t be happening. He had worked so hard to keep his secret, to keep his friends, and now they would abandon him just like everyone else had, everyone except Dumbledore. He alone remained in Remus’ life after finding out what he was.

“I was watching.” James retorted slowly. “Spying would suggest I believed the person I was watching was lying to me.” His eyes came up to rest on his friend, tears slipping down both of their cheeks, soft betraying tears of the cracks only just becoming visible in a perfect friendship. “Are you lying to me, Remus?”

“A… about what?” Remus wiped the tears from his face, but while the shining tears had been erased, the betrayal remained, shining more than ever.

“Your mother, how many times was she ill last year?” James’s eyes were cold and accusing, the tears clinging to his eyelashes the last remains of trust in the boy sitting opposite him. Remus counted carefully in his head, half to remember how many full moons he had lived through under the careful watch of the headmaster, half to give himself time, time to come up with an explanation, time to ready himself for the look of loathing in his friend’s eyes.

“Nine.” He knew the instant he said it how stupid it sounded, how unbelievable.

“Nine serious illnesses in ten months, Remus, she must be seriously unlucky.”

“It wasn’t nine different illnesses.” Remus defended quickly. “She’s very ill, but sometimes it’s worse than others.” He stared at his feet scuffing against the carpet as he swung them back and forth nervously.

“You know, I’m not the only person who has noticed your regular leaving. That slimy git Snape was making jokes at dinner.” A bolt of fury lit James’s eyes like lightening in a thunderstorm. Remus’ eyes shot to meet James’s.

“What, what did he say?” Remus’ voice was wavering with worry and anger. James working out his secret was one thing; if he had in fact, come to the correct conclusions, however, Severus Snape working it out would be the end of his masquerade. Snape would tell everyone in the school and then the owls would start coming. Students parents sending Howlers to Dumbledore about him. Howlers calling him a monster and a half-breed. Howlers screaming about how they didn’t want filth like that attending school with their children. James was silent for a moment.

“He said your mother must be an invalid and you have to change her…” He stopped, “you have to help her with monthly problems.” Remus trembled with rage, something James noticed easily.

“Sirius and I are serving a weeks detention with Professor Stickleburn, but on the plus side, Snape was sporting a nice set of tentacles.”

“Thank you.” Remus whispered, tenderly tracing the weave of the armchair with his fingertips.

“It comes at a price through, Remus. You know we would all do anything to protect the other, and what you tell me now will go to the grave. How long have you been a Werewolf?” his voice was soft, curious, much to Remus’ surprise, there was not a hint of malice to be found. Remus knew James was watching him intently, and he didn’t have the heart, or the energy to lie anymore.

“Longer than I can remember.” He sighed, his fingers shaking. “How did you know?”

“You disappear every night of the full moon, you’re always tired afterwards, you try and hide the scars on your body, but I’ve seen them,” he paused slightly, his lips curling into a small smile. “You eat the rarest meat I have ever seen just before the full moon.” Remus smiled lightly, he did get cravings for hardly cooked meat, and no mater how rare he had it; it was always overcooked.

“How long have you…”

“About two months. I wanted to make sure I was right.”

“And do Sirius and Peter know?”

“Sirius down, but he would never ask you. Peter on the other hand is as dense as a Hufflepuff. He has no idea.” Remus nodded slowly, looking up to James.

“I’m sorry I lied to you.”

“Don’t worry about it. I just don’t understand why you didn’t tell us, we’re best friends.”

“James, it isn’t like a stupid secret like my father’s a Muggle, I couldn’t tell you.”

“But why?” Remus remained silent for a moment; James had been popular from the first day of school. He was outgoing, funny, talented; how could he make him understand the fears of an outcast?

“You see how people react, and the more you see that reaction, you start believing them, believing that everyone will react that way.”

“Remus, that’s rid…”

“James, you could turn up tomorrow with a dragon and people would like you more than they would a Werewolf.”

“You know, Remus, Sirius and I were talking, maybe we could come with you. Help you through it.” James was smiling gently at his friend, a smile that warmed Remus’ heart for a moment before he shook it away.

“I would bite you.” He replied.

“It wouldn’t be so bad. We could have a right laugh.” Again, a warmth spread like spilt potion through Remus’ body, but when he closed his eyes for a moment, he gasped at the image that resided there, his three best friends, lying motionless on the floor, blood pooling around them from what he had done.

“No, James. That won’t happen.” Remus’ voice was hard and commanding. “I would never forgive myself.”

“Thought you might say that.” James grinned. “So we’ve decided on a course of action.”

“And what’s that?”

“We’re becoming Animagi.” James looked so proud of himself that Remus couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow grinning.

“Excuse me?”

“We’re going to learn how to transform into animals like old McGonagall. I read up on it. Werewolves get on well with other animals.” Remus could feel his heart slowly swelling as if someone was pumping a steady stream of air into it.

“You’ll have to help, obviously. Sirius and I are hardly the studying type.”

“I’m sure I can help.” Remus grinned. “You know you have to register.”

“Moony, my Werewolf friend,” Remus and James both grinned. Remus liked the name Moony instantly. James raised an eyebrow, his eyes sparkling playfully.

“Where would be the adventure in that?”