Esprit de Corps

Chapter 15

Dumbledore looked up from his desk as his door flew open to reveal a very weak-looking Harry Potter in the doorway.

"Hello, young Harry," said Dumbledore pleasantly, "what brings you here? Shouldn't you be in bed?"

Harry nodded slowly and sank on a chair, which transfigured itself into a stuffed couch at a movement of the Headmaster's hand.

"I don't want to stay at Hermione's house anymore, sir," Harry said flatly.

"Does this have anything to do with what happened yesterday?"

Harry nodded. Dumbledore shook his head.

"Have you consulted your friends about this?"

"No, sir. I Apparated before they awoke."

"You Apparated inside Hogwarts?"

"Yes. I asked the castle, and she agreed to allow me in."

Dumbledore nodded.

"I'm afraid I must decline your request, Harry. You must consult your friends first."

Harry stood up and put his hands on Dumbledore's table, leaning over slightly.

"You don't understand," he said urgently, "they are in danger because of me. They will be imperilled as long as I am around them..."

"I'm sure they know what risk they took when they vowed to be there by your side, my boy."

"But they don't deserve to be in mortal danger!"

"Neither do you, Harry," said Dumbledore quietly.

"I don't have a choice, sir. They do. They're not taking it merely because of me. I don't want to ruin the lives of the people I care about. I don't want them to end up like Sirius..." A tear made its way down his cheek.

"You can't run away from them, Harry."

"I have to. It's the only way to keep them safe - even if they hate me for it."

Dumbledore opened his mouth to say something, but he was interrupted by a flash of fire. Remus' head appeared in the fireplace. He looked anxious.

"Remus? What's the matter?"

"Professor - Ron and Hermione just owled me. Harry has vanished."

"Don't worry, Remus. And tell the children not to worry, either. Harry is with me."

"Thank Merlin!" relief flooded the werewolf's tired face. He took his leave.

"See how much they love you, Harry?"

Harry nodded guiltily.

"It will be better for them if they hate me," he said quietly.

"Stop acting like an idiot, Harry!" said Dumbledore angrily.

Harry looked up at the Headmaster, his eyes full of tears.

"I have to! Do you know how much it hurts me to see them in trouble on my account? Have you any idea what it was like when Ron was hit by the chess piece in our first year so that I could go on with my idiotic heroic act? What I felt when Hermione was lying petrified in the Hospital Wing - which wouldn't have happened if I had not been there? When Cedric died in my place? When Sirius died because he came to save me? And yesterday - when I saw that beam of the Killing Curse advancing towards Ron? You can't imagine what it feels like to see people hurt - or even die - merely because they have dared to love and care for you when no one else has...I'd rather be alone than see more people hurt because of me..."

Dumbledore couldn't resist putting his arms around his favourite student in a fatherly hug. There was a flash of light as the white blossom appeared on Dumbledore's wrist. Before he could say anything, however, he felt Harry sag in his arms.

The chair turned into a couch as Dumbledore laid Harry on it.

"What am I to do with you, my child?" he cried.