I Kept Trying to Forget That Night, But...

Prologue

It was a clear night, and the moon shone brightly down on the blackened ruins of the house. Within them a tall, cloaked figure paced backwards and forwards, muttering. At first it might seem as if he was talking to himself, but then the watcher might discern a small shape on the floor: a tiny baby, wrapped in blankets. And then the watcher might realise that in the shadows in the corner of the room lay two scarred corpses: the infant's parents. Suddenly the pacer came to an abrupt halt and faced the child.

"And so, Harry Potter," he sneered, "this is the end for you. But the beginning for me." Then the words of the Death Curse screamed through the air, green light flickered...

And suddenly there was silence. The tall, skeletal form of the wizard had disappeared, and everything was suddenly silent. And from a hiding place behind a wall, out crept the sole onlooker, shocked and confused, and comforted the crying child.

Chapter 1

Harry awoke on the morning of his birthday feeling dejected. He had, as usual, received presents from his friends in the middle of the night, yet the thought of this failed to cheer him as it normally did. Somehow this year, after his near-death experience at the end of the last term, it felt extra depressing that his only extant kin would yet again choose to ignore his birthday.

He trudged downstairs, and was received by a wave of commands.

"Fetch the mail!"

"Come and fry the eggs!"

"Now today, boy, you're to wash the car and repaint the fence," he heard his Uncle Vernon call. He sighed and wearily collected the post from where it lay underneath the letterbox. As he returned to the table, however, something caught his eye. A letter for him?

Harry slit open the envelope quickly; he couldn't help but remember the last time he had started opening a letter at the Dursley's breakfast table, but fortunately at that moment the presenter on the blaring television announced that Dudley's favourite TV programme had been cancelled, and Dudley's wails distracted attention from Harry's letter. Out of the envelope slid a bright purple card with 'Happy Birthday' emblazoned on the front. And then, before Harry could open it to find out who it was from, out of the card slipped an envelope, on which was written, neatly, 'Mr and Mrs V. Dursley'. Harry stared at it in amazement. Who would want to send him a birthday card, and yet wouldn't send it by owl and would enclose a letter to the Dursleys?

"What's that?" Aunt Petunia suddenly snapped, her hawk-like eyes finally spotting the card (not that it was hard, with the brightly coloured cover).

"It's a birthday card," Harry said, slightly indignant that he should feel like he had to hide the fact that he had received a card on his birthday. "And there's a letter enclosed for you and Uncle Vernon." He handed it to her and quickly scanned the card as she and Uncle Vernon narrowed their eyes suspiciously at the letter and opened the envelope. The card read :

Dear Harry,

First of all, happy birthday! I realise that the card might have come as a bit of a shock, so I'll explain why I sent it (apart from to wish you birthday greetings, of course). Professor Dumbledore has asked me to take you to London for the weekend at the end of August. I needed to ask your Aunt and Uncle's permission, obviously, and I felt that Muggle post might make a better impression than an eagle owl swooping down the chimney!

Yours,

Remus Lupin.

A few weeks later, Harry was awaiting Lupin's arrival impatiently. He must have written a very persuasive letter, because, although Uncle Vernon had worn a large frown for several days after receiving it, and for several days before he was due to arrive, he had raised very few objections. Now Harry was sitting on his case in the hall (as Lupin had instructed him to take all his Hogwarts things with him), wondering how his ex-teacher would arrive. He hoped there wouldn't be a similar sort of mix-up to what had happened when the Weasleys had tried to come by Floo powder. But then, if Lupin had written a normal Muggle letter, surely he'd know to use Muggle transportation? Harry's fears were put at bay as the doorbell rang. He stood up quickly and answered the door, his aunt and uncle hovering disapprovingly at the back of the hall.

"Hi Harry!" Lupin said as the door opened. He looked just as he had two years ago, smiling and bright, yet with a hint of fatigue, and grey hair around his temples. "Ah, and this is your aunt and uncle. You must be Petunia," he said, walking in past Harry's things and extending his hand to Aunt Petunia. "I believe we met at Lily and James's wedding."

"Please don't remind me of that," Petunia said coldly, ignoring the hovering hand. "I've spent over 15 years trying to forget that freak affair."There was a tense silence.

"Ah, well," Lupin replied uncertainly. "Um... We'll be going then, here, let me help you with your case, Harry." And with that he hurried him out of the door. "It's sad when Muggle-wizard relations have deteriorated that far," he muttered, half to Harry, half to himself. Harry, meanwhile, was pleased to be seeing a car in front of him, and not anything more unusual. "Just get in," he said, "I'll put your case in the boot." They sped away down the motorway towards London, and a heavy silence pervaded the car. Harry didn't know what Lupin was thinking, but numerous questions were running round Harry, and yet he didn't feel he could ask any of them.

"Professor, I mean, erm..." he said finally.

"Just call me Remus."

"Well, er, Remus, I was wondering-"

"No questions until London, Harry," Remus interrupted. "We'll talk then, when we're somewhere private, but not before."

When they finally arrived in London, and Remus had parked his car in a hidden wizarding car park, Harry was bursting with unanswered questions. However he had to keep silent still longer, until they reached the Leaky Cauldron, and Remus led him up to the 2 rooms he had booked, and, after Harry had dumped his luggage, brought him into his own room and shut the door carefully.

"Well, Harry," he said. "I made sure that I got this room in particular, as it's magically soundproofed and safe from prying ears. So, we can finally have a proper talk. I think I'd better start, though, as there's a lot to say. Then, if you've got any questions left, you can ask me. Okay?" And so, with Harry seated on the bed, Remus, leaning against the door, began to tell him what had been happening that summer.

Or rather, what he couldn't or wouldn't tell him about what had been happening that summer.

"Harry, I know this might be hard for you to understand, but we're going to have to keep you in the dark about a lot of this. You're only going to be told as much as the majority of the wizarding public knows. Dumbledore sent me here, mainly to tell you to steer clear of any strange happenings. You're just like me and your father and the others were when we were young, too curious for your own good, and always getting into trouble of some sort, but the difference is that your father and I didn't have an evil, power-hungry wizard after us. Nothing's changed Harry. Voldemort's back, and he still wants to kill you. Hopefully your experience at the end of last term has taught you that much, but you have to understand this : he's out there and he's looking for you. He wants revenge. He's made his presence known in some small ways, but nothing conclusive enough to persuade Fudge, or the Daily Prophet, that he's back. Everyone's jittery, though, and it wouldn't take much to instigate a full-scale panic. So no talking about what happened last term, no adventures, no breaking school rules, and definitely nothing illegal!"

Harry nodded and looked at the floor, feeling guilty. Remus didn't know that he had already been reading up on an illegal curse that summer. He remembered his last meeting with Voldemort well, and he didn't want to be stuck for spells to cast like he had last time. He had learnt the Avada Kevadra killing curse, and he hoped he had a chance to use it on the evil that had killed his parents. He clenched his fists by his sides.

"Now, Harry," Remus continued, "thankfully Fudge has at least listened to one bit of the advice Albus gave him last year. The Dementors have been removed from Azkaban. They're no longer in Britain : the Americans have been wanting to buy them off us for a long time. Of course Fudge didn't do it voluntarily. But somehow it got leaked to the press that at the end of your third year one of them had almost administered the Kiss on you. Well, you've got a lot of fans out there, and the anti-Dementor lobby got a lot stronger after that." He smiled suddenly. "Albus can be pretty cunning when he puts his mind to it."

Harry walked away down the corridor to his own room thinking hard about everything Remus had, or hadn't, said. He was also considering carefully the merits of trying to learn the Avada Kedavra. It was, after all, one of the three Unforgiveable curses which could earn you a life sentence in Azkaban. On the other hand, he didn't think he'd like to be unable to kill Voldemort if he had the chance. Though of course having the chance would depend on his being alive next time he saw Voldemort. And considering the fact that Remus seemed to be very worried, that might not be the case. He had almost reached his room when, deep in thought, he bumped into someone. Harry helped the startled man pick up his papers, and then turned into his room and slumped onto the bed. He could do with a break. Perhaps a day or two without the Dursley's, and with Remus, would do the trick. Unless there were any more conversations about the vicious murderer on his tail.

Harry spent two carefree days in Diagon Alley with Remus, shopping for his school things and talking. Harry was especially curious to hear about his father when he had been young. Soon, however, Remus had to return to work, and so, the Monday before school started again, he dropped Harry off at The Burrow, to spend the remainder of the holiday with the Weasleys.

"Harry!" Ron came running out to greet him when he saw the car draw up. "How've you been?"

"Well, most of the summer I've been with the Dursleys, so not great," Harry replied. "But staying with Remus in Diagon Alley has been loads of fun. How 'bout you?"

"Well, I've just been bored out of my skull, to be honest. Normally I'd at least have Fred and George to hang around with, but they're busy with their joke shop."

"Your mum's letting them have one?" Harry asked, though he had a feeling he knew why.

"Well she didn't have much choice really, after someone invested in their company. Imagine investing in a company run by Fred and George! You'd have to either be really thick, or have never met them!"

"Yeah," Harry agreed hurriedly. "What about Hermione? Have you heard from her?"

Ron's expression darkened.

"She's in Bulgaria with Krum," he said shortly. "Haven't you been in touch?"

"Well, yeah, I was earlier in the summer," Harry said, slightly shocked by his friend's reaction. "But I thought she might be back by now." Ron shook his head.

"She doesn't get back until the 31st of August. She's having such a great time with 'Vicky'!" he spat. "I'm surprised she even found time to send you a present!"

"Oh, she did, it was a really nice set of Quidditch gloves, and the autographs of the Bulgarian team. I suppose Krum must have..." Harry tailed off at the sight of Ron's frown. "Erm, I'll just take my case upstairs shall I?"