Lost

Chapter One

Hermione sat up straight in bed and screamed, coming to her senses she looked around the room in fear. To her relief no one had awoken, in fact the other fifth year girls were sleeping quite peacefully, some even letting out quiet snores. She sighed and gently lay her head back onto her pillow, trying to no avail to remember the horrible dream that had awoken her from her sleep. She squeezed her eyes shut in frustration, why couldn't she remember, as she ground her teeth together she saw a quick flash before her, it looked like Neville, laughing with the other boys in the dormitory, she felt a small smile shine through. At least he would always be there to make her smile, the picture faded and the feeling that something was wrong took over her body once again.

Suddenly three words flashed across the inside of her eyelids, 'the common room.' Her eyes snapped open in realization, and she stood as quickly as she could, not bothering to grab a robe to cover up her pajamas. She didn't know why she was going downstairs, in fact, everything about the night had been odd, especially the boys. Harry looked uptight, Ron oblivious, and Neville sad. She was acting abnormally as well, if a bad dream plagued her sleep she would wave it off, and go back to sleep, never had she gotten up to investigate things that popped into her head. Halfway to the door she stopped walking, feeling incredibly stupid she turned to go back to bed, before she could take a step she heard a loud bang, one that shattered the silence in the dormitory like a rock smashing a window. Then once again the Gryffindor dormitories were silenced.

She could hear her footsteps echoing loudly in the stairwell, the soft patter of her bare feet against the cold stone. Upon reaching bottom step she peered out into the darkened Common Room, everything seemed in order, but the dark lied. She reached deep into her pocket for her wand, whispering a 'lumos' spell, watching as light began to spew from her wand. The scene that lay in front of her made her scream again, tears formed in her eyes and she turned to run up the stairs, tripping and bruising her knees. Lying on the common room floor was Neville, gun in hand, blood spattered across the walls and mirrors that circled the crimson and gold room. She turned to look at Neville again, the pool of blood that surrounded his head stained the golden carpet beneath him, tears flowing down her cheeks she whispered his name quietly, "Neville."

She heard footsteps on the stairs behind her and looked up to see George Weasley standing above her, his red hair shining in the dim light of their wands, eyes only partly open showing that he had just woken up. His mouth fell open seeing the boy on the floor, and then his eyes traveled to Hermione, she had seen him first, alone, she found him.

"Hermione," he said quietly, "are you....okay?"

She cried out as he tried to get her to stand and then wrap her in a hug, pushing him away. She could only see Neville, hear him as he said goodnight to her, feel him as he gave her the hug before she went to bed. She could hear the footsteps of more students coming down the stairs, and then they all rounded the corner, most looking at her for an answer, their eyes prying into her. She turned and ran, not caring that her feet were becoming wet with droplets of his blood. Pushing open the portrait savagely and running into the hall. She stumbled through the halls, going deeper into the maze of a castle thinking about the last moments with Neville, about his blood covered body, about how she could have prevented everything that had happened, prevented him from killing himself. As she rounded a corner she tripped ungracefully and slammed into the ground, letting the sobs rack her body she pictured the blood bath, which she had witnessed.

"Hermione," George's voice was warm but firm. "Hermione, get up, please look at me."

She raised her head to stare at him, tears blurring her vision, and took his hand as he offered it to help her up. She stood and almost fell again, things were too hard to handle, she wondered why he would do that to himself, what motive he had, his life hadn't been as bad as he perceived it. Now people would hurt inside because of his selfishness. She would hurt, she felt hate course through her, couldn't he tell how much she cared for him? As her knees gave out beneath her she felt his strong arms wrap around her. She began to sob harder against his chest.

"Why," she choked out, "why would he do that?"

"Shh," he said comfortingly, "I don't know, he thought everything was to hard to handle, he

thought that things would never get better."

She slammed her fists against his chest angrily, "That's not fair," she screamed.

He stood there, pressing her closer, letting her scream and hit him, understanding the pain and horror that her eyes had unexpectedly come across. Her sobs soon turned to whimpers, although her sobs had quieted her shoulders still were shaking.

"He's not allowed to leave," she shouted angrily, scaring George again. "He has no reason to leave, what about the people whose lives are unbearable, what about his Grandmother, what will she do? What about us? Me?" She sighed in anguish.

He tried to comfort her, only to find himself crying as well. He wondered what on earth had possessed the boy to kill himself, he had no reason, sure his life wasn't the greatest, but he hadn't been subjected to the physical and mental abuse like Hermione. Hadn't had to watch over his shoulder every night like Harry, needn't worry about money like himself, the idiot boy had no fucking reason to leave this earth.

"Ms. Granger, Mr. Weasley, what seems to be the problem here," Professor McGonagall said sternly, looking at the students with questioning eyes, "do you have any idea what time it is?"

"It's Neville," Hermione whispered, "He, he..."

"Get on with it Miss Granger, what about Mister Longbottom?"

"He killed himself," George finished, seeing Hermione falter.

"Excuse me," the professor looked astonished. "If this is some kind of joke Mister Weasley, I assure you, expulsion is in order."

"It's true," Hermione coughed out. "He killed himself, I found him in the common room, he was..." she started to sob again.

McGonagall frowned and the creases in her face seemed to grow deeper, "Follow me, it seems that you both should stay in the Infirmary tonight, I'm sure you'd agree."

George took Hermione's hand in his and they followed the professor, still trying to fathom what they had discovered.