Life After Living

Chapter Thirteen

If I smile and don't believe

Soon I know I'll wake from this dream

~Hello, Evanescence

Ron knew he shouldn't have been surprised when his bed shifted of its own accord, but Harry had been so quiet that Ron hadn't heard him coming. The only indication of his surprise was a small exhalation of breath. He pulled the blanket away from him and Harry slid in next to him. He welcomed the warmth of the smaller boy and hugged him close.

"Ron," Harry said after a few minutes had passed. His head rested on Ron's shoulder, arm draped over Ron's chest.

"Yeah?"

"There's something I should tell you. I thought maybe I wouldn't, but it wouldn't be right not to."

"You weren't kissing my sister in the drawing room before cake were you?"

"Of course not! Ron, that's gross."

"I agree. Please don't ever do that."

"I have no problem with that. But Ron, we weren't talking about Quidditch."

Ron was silent for a second. "I didn't really figure as much. Ginny wasn't able to hide her surprise very well at the news." Another few seconds passed. "What were you talking about?"

"She asked if I liked Hermione, if I had told you as much and that was why you had backed out on Hermione. I was too surprised by it, but I thought maybe I could convince her that maybe that was the case. I thought it would be easier that way."

"That would be a pretty good excuse," Ron agreed.

"But your sister is too smart for that." Harry's hesitation hung in the air. "She asked me if I had feelings for you."

Harry felt Ron go rigid beneath him. "And what did you say?"

"I'm sorry, Ron. I couldn't hide my surprise. I tried to play it off just as easily as I had with the idea that I had feelings for Hermione, but I just couldn't." Harry was quick to continue. "She only knows that I have feelings for you. She knows nothing else. She has no clue. And I made her promise not to tell a soul."

Harry couldn't take the silence after a while. He sat up. "I'm very sorry, Ron. You know I'm not good at lying. If you want me to--"

"Shut up, Harry," Ron interrupted. He pulled Harry back down against him, resuming their previous position.

"I understand if you're ashamed of this," Harry said quietly.

"I'm not ashamed," Ron answered. "Not in the tiniest bit." Harry relaxed against him. More minutes passed in the darkness. Harry was almost asleep with Ron spoke again. "She won't keep her promise. She'll tell Hermione. She won't be able to help it."

"I'm sorry," Harry said again.

"Maybe it would be better if someone knew. Keeping a secret is fun and all, but only for so long. We'll just have to see how long Ginny can keep one."

"I want this, Ron, but..."

"We're not going to be able to keep this a secret forever."

"Weren't you the one that originally brought up keeping this a secret?"

"Well it wouldn't be the first time this week that I've had a drastic change in opinion."

There was another lull in the conversation as both of their minds processed thoughts. Ron let his fingers comb Harry's hair. "I don't want to ever have to question whether or not this is real," Harry whispered after a while.

Ron paused in his combing for only a moment. "It was shockingly sudden, Harry, but that doesn't make it any less real. It will be real because we make it real." Harry turned his head to look up at Ron. Ron looked back down at him. "What?"

"Have you always been this smart, and I just didn't notice?" Ron laughed and answered the question with a kiss.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

He'd been wandering the halls alone, escaping the hissing sound, when he had come upon the cat. He knew instantly that the cat had to be related to the horse of his previous dreams. Their coats were identical in that they changed color with every movement. It appeared that the cat was glittering as it moved along the corridor, candlelight bouncing off its satin fur.

It seemed that he followed the cat for ages, weaving in and out of corridors and around statues. It was only when he stopped to lick his paw that he realized that he too had become a cat. Stumbling up to a piece of shiny armor, he made the discovery that he wasn't just any cat. He was a panther cub, with black fur covering his body.

The other cat rubbed up against him and he turned to find a lion cub next to him. A tuft of burgundy hair rose from the top of the lion's head as it purred. When it turned he saw a red mark running down the length of its shoulder, a vicious scar. It licked his nose and scampered away playfully. Letting out a playful growl he bounded after the lion cub.

The castle had many small spaces to run in and out of, but neither cub would go anywhere near the dungeon. The lion made a whimpering noise when they strayed too close. He didn't blame it. He didn't like the dungeon much either.

When they came upon the Great Hall, the lion didn't hesitate in the least before bounding in. He followed after the golden fur ball at a trot. He almost tripped over the lion as he entered the doors.

The horse was neighing in fear as the snake wrapped itself around the larger beast's neck. Fangs sunk into skin and the scream of pain from the horse was deafening. The lion hid his face beneath his clumsy paws. He could only stand and stare as the transformation happened.

It seemed as though the snake and horse melted into each other. With the reports of pain and fear from the horse, the hissing began louder than ever before. The hissing was coming from the horse now, though. He stared in horror as the horse flicked its forked tongue. Scales began to erupt across the horse's body. Its bones began to break and shift as if it were a werewolf under the full moon. Smoke rose from its nostrils.

He yelped in surprise when the lion nipped at his leg. With begging eyes the lion urged him to follow and they fled the Great Hall. They escaped down a narrow hall and when they came to the end he found himself in the Drawing Room. The lion was gone. He was human again and on all fours. The hissing remained.

He raced from the drawing room and took the stairs as many as four at a time. He tripped on the last set and landed hard on the landing. He scrambled up and made for the door to his bedroom. The hissing had only increased in volume. A light caught his eye as his hand grasped the doorknob, and he turned and found himself looking to the stairs to the attic room.

The hissing stopped immediately. It was dead silence for many moments before he heard the next sound. It was almost so soft that he missed it. It came again, though, and this time he knew he hadn't imagined it. Someone or something was whining. He heard a pant of breath and was at once running for the stairs. He knew he missed a step for he found himself falling. He heard another whine as he continued to fall. He screamed out as the darkness enveloped him.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

"Sirius!" It was the flailing that woke Ron before the scream. The adrenaline pounded in his ears as he struggled to get a hold of the screaming boy in his bed.

"Harry. Harry, wake up." There was a panic in his voice and as Harry continued to flail and scream it deepened his voice. "Harry."

"Sirius, help!" Harry shouted, his body twisting as if he were falling.

In a last ditch effort, Ron grabbed Harry's shoulders and shook. "Harry!"

Harry's eyes snapped open and he grabbed Ron's arms. "Ron. He's here." Harry struggled against Ron, but the redhead kept him pinned to the bed. "He's here! I heard him. He's alive. Ron, please."

"Harry, it was a dream."

"No," but his voice broke. "No. I heard him. He's here. He's upstairs." Harry wasn't struggling anymore. Ron sat back on his heels and released Harry. Moonlight shone through a space in the curtains lighting a line down his freckled face. "He's alive. I know he is," Harry choked out.

"Harry," Ron said gently. There was a flare in Harry's eyes. He pulled himself from Ron's arms and got up.

He was midway between the bed and the door when the door opened. Light from the hall flooded into the room and sparked in Harry's eyes. He planted both feet in a stance that clearly conveyed fear. Ron stood instantly at the sight of Remus. "Is everything all right?" the older man asked. "Harry?"

"What are you hiding?"

"Harry," Ron spoke. He moved forward between Harry and Remus. "It's okay, Mr. Lupin. I've got him." Remus looked at Ron a little surprised.

"No!" Harry pushed Ron aside. "He's lying to us. They're all lying to us!" It was then that Arthur and Molly appeared behind Remus, blocking the light from the hallway. They were in their nightclothes looking bewildered. Ron could see that Harry was starting to panic. He was sure the whole house was awake now. Harry looked at Ron with fear in his eyes. "They're lying!"

"I- I think I'll go make some calming tea," Molly said and scuttled off. Ron put a hand on Harry's arm.

"Harry, please." Harry turned to Ron sharply. Ron only gripped Harry's arm tighter. He could feel Harry shaking beneath his grip. "Mr. Lupin, it's quite all right. He just had a bad dream is all." Remus hesitated. "Dad, please."

"It's... very early," Arthur said. "You two should get back to sleep."

"I agree," Remus said. He looked at Harry and then at the nearly untouched bed. He glanced quickly at Ron's bed and its tangled sheets before turning and following Arthur out of the room.

Ron let go of Harry's arm, but not before turning the smaller boy towards him. "Harry."

"I can feel it, Ron. There's something they're not telling us. I just know. Merlin, Ron, am I going crazy?"

"No, Harry, of course not!" Ron pulled Harry into his arms. Harry leaned into the hug, wrapping his own arms around Ron. Pulling away, Ron hesitantly placed a kiss on Harry's lips. "What happened? What did you dream?"

Harry stepped away, taking a seat on the edge of Ron's bed. "I can't."

"What are we, Harry?" Harry looked up confused. "Besides being best friends we're, what? Boyfriends?"

Harry answered quietly, "Boyfriends? Yeah. I suppose. Something like that."

"Then let me help you." Ron sat down next to Harry, taking his hand. "Tell me what's in those dreams that scares you so much."

"I can't tell you, Ron."

"You can't tell me? Or you won't tell me? Can you not remember them? I never remember my dreams."

Harry looked down at his hands. "I remember them."

"So you won't tell me?"

Harry closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. "I don't know what it is. I don't know if I'm being shown a lie again or if it's just a silly dream. It scares me." Ron waited silently. "Before it was just myself."

"And this time you weren't alone?"

"No. There was a cat. He reminded me a lot of the horse."

"There was a horse?" Ron studied Harry carefully.

"There's been a horse for a while now. His fur... it's... different. And the cat had the same fur. And then he became a lion cub and I was a panther cub." Ron looked at Harry oddly. "Always, there is the hissing and then the snake. The snake bites the horse. This time... this time the horse began to change. The horse and snake became one. He... I think the horse was becoming... a dragon."

"A dragon?"

"Yes."

"And..." Ron hesitated before asking, "Has there ever been a badger."

Harry looked up at him. "No."

"A crow?"

Harry shook his head. "No. Why?"

"I don't know." Ron looked away.

"Do you think he's sending me this dream?"

"You-Know-Who?" Harry nodded. "He could. I--"

There was a soft knock on the door and Harry stood. He went to his own bed and sat down as Ron spoke. "Who is it?"

"It's me," came Hermione's voice. Ron looked over at Harry.

"Come in," Harry answered. The door cracked open and Hermione's head appeared.

"The adults are down in the kitchen having a discussion. Is everything all right?" she asked. Harry was silent. She looked to Ron for an answer.

"Harry thinks Sirius might still be alive. That perhaps they are keeping him in the attic room."

"But Molly said they were only keeping dark artifacts up there." Ron nodded his agreement.

"I know it doesn't matter what I think, but--"

"Oh, Harry, honestly." Hermione placed her hands on her hips.

"Who would want to believe me anyway? Especially after what happened at the Ministry."

"Harry, that wasn't your fault!" Ron said heatedly. "Do you want proof, is that it?"

Harry looked at Ron timidly. "Ron, maybe--"

"No. You think they're keeping Sirius up there. Maybe if you saw for yourself that he wasn't it would help." Hermione looked about to argue, but shut her mouth, a thoughtful look on her face. "Come on." Ron grabbed a lit candle and opened the door. "Let's go."

Harry stood, but didn't move forward. "He's right, Harry. Maybe we should go take a look." Harry nodded and followed Ron out of the room.

As Ron led the way up the stairs Harry looked back at Hermione, who gave a faint smile, before following after. Ron waited by the door until Harry reached him. "You'll see that he's not up here, Harry. If it's what you need than let it be done." Harry turned when he felt Hermione's hand on his arm.

"We'll be right behind you, Harry."

Harry took a deep breath as he put his hand on the knob of the door that stood between him and the attic room. He didn't know what to expect. He had less of an idea of what could actually be behind the old wooden door. His dream echoed in his mind. The whine and pant of breath seemed to be in his ear again. He wanted nothing more to open the door and find Sirius waiting for him inside. After another breath he tried to turn the knob. The door was locked. He took another breath and mumbled an unlocking spell. The knob turned freely. Hermione sent a startled look in Ron's direction. Ron silenced her with a hand.

Everything beyond the door was shrouded in darkness. Harry moved into the room, stepping lightly. The only senses available to him in the darkness were smell and sound. The room was completely quiet. The room almost smelled sterile to him, but it had an underlying smell he couldn't quite catch. There was no evidence to his nose that a hippogriff had ever lived in the room.

"Ron, the light," Harry heard Hermione whisper from the doorway. Candlelight flickered into the room as Ron entered. Harry watched as the light flickered along the floorboards and then across the walls. Harry made out the small attic window that was heavily draped as the light moved over it. The light then lit on a small table on which sat a small basin and a jug. A folded cloth lay next them. Harry took a step forward as the flickering light reached a large canopied bed that was as heavily draped as the window. He looked back to see equally startled looks on the faces of Hermione and Ron. There was no trace of any dark artifacts in the sparsely furnished room.

As Harry moved forward, and the light with him, he saw a chair sitting next to the left side of the bed next to a bedside table. An unlit candle sat on top of it. He moved around to that side of the bed, having only to wait seconds before the light followed him and he felt the presence of Ron and Hermione behind him. Hermione made a barely audible concerned noise as Harry's fingers curled around the silk fabric of the bed hangings. With a quick movement fueled by anticipation, Harry pulled aside the crimson drape. Candlelight flooded into the enclosed space, glinting off silvery hair and ghostlike pale skin. Hermione gasped aloud and the light wavered.

Harry found himself breathless with shock. His eyes took in the crimson coverings marred with the lifeless pale form. Sticklike arms lay over the blankets that were pulled up not quite covering the top of a pale chest and neck. The silvery blond hair contrasted sharply against the pillow. Harry found himself staring at the young, pale, unconscious face and the pointed nose as Ron hissed behind him, "Malfoy."

Harry felt his stomach sour at the sight of Draco Malfoy lying unconscious before him. Emotions came in waves as the shock relented and was followed by horror and then fear and finally disgust. Anger welled inside him. The Order had been hiding this from him. There was a Malfoy under the same roof as them and they hadn't told him. There was a Malfoy in Sirius' bed.

Harry leaned forward, using his knee to boost him up, and roughly grabbed Draco Malfoy's arm. He turned it over inspecting the forearm. "Harry!" Hermione gasped, but he ignored her. He reached across Malfoy's form and turned the other arm over. It was as clean and unblemished as the other. Harry sat back, his hand shaking.

"Why didn't they tell us?" Harry could hear the anger in Ron's voice. "How dare they keep him here."

"Ron, there's obviously something wrong with him," came Hermione's reasoning voice. "I wonder what happened to him. He looks so..."

"Dead?" Ron offered. Harry glanced back at them before looking back at Malfoy. Looking harder at his sworn enemy, Harry saw his chest rise slightly. Draco Malfoy was not dead, but he looked to be. Harry's eyes trailed up again to Malfoy's shoulders. A speck of black on white where the blanket touched the very top of Malfoy's chest caught his eye and he reached forward again.

"What are you doing?" Hermione asked.

Harry ignored her again, grasping the blanket and pulling it away. The blanket fell away as Harry gasped, taking in Malfoy's marred chest. Covering the entire expanse of Draco Malfoy's pale torso was a large black skeleton head burned into the flesh. The opening of the skeleton's mouth was even with the belly button where a snake emerged, its tongue disappearing around Malfoy's side. Hermione screamed as the light dropped and went out.